sam

i have officially "given birth to myself" after 9 months. :) doing really well!
- major weight redistribution!
- gotten sick SO MUCH this year. virus? allergies? nutrition?
- HURT MY VOICE trying to sing. i was too damn joyful. - you get to hear me sing. eep.
- used the men's bathroom a couple times & "passed" at the gap
- need to learn to give myself my shot to be self-sufficient to avoid issues / complications in the future. alternate delivery methods: subcutaneous into butt or 6 month shot.
- finally re-recorded my voicemail message. before/after
- my laugh is really loud and deep. embarrassing / getting used to it.

[@angaloo23]

You're Welcome! Yay! For being self sufficient. I had problems with the subQ in the belly, but I had different medicine so I assumed it was the meds. I actually think some people do subq in their legs. Can't wait to hear how it all turns out.

[@JustMxAsh]

It's so great to see you this happy :D ... gives me hope that maybe one day it could happen for me to. Sorry you hurt your voice but yu still sound good and look great too.

[@SamC74_Est_2006]

HUGE voice change! And I like the haircut! So happy for you!

[@videokidsam]

@Popeslave hehe, thanks, radford!! i am SO looking forward to it.

[@videokidsam]

@Heather1415 thank you again for the tip about reelout! you are right, i should check out that video again. i am just so used to my friend doing it for me that i don't feel like i have to learn how to be self-sufficient even though i know i need to be in the long run...

[@videokidsam]

@sirdextrose hey thanks for the awesome comment. yeah, the confidence is slowly rising. :) good luck on your trip!

[@videokidsam]

@lizliz1225 hey liz!!!!! long time no see! thanks for the suggestion, but the big thing i have heard about the patches is that the adhesive is crazy irritating to the skin since you have to wear it every single day. :( so far still can't give myself my shot but i am working on getting smaller needles and taking tips from people and have a super awesome friend who "does me in the butt every week when i am ready." :) i hope school is going well!!

[@videokidsam]

@bbbbakey hey luke! thanks! you know the weird thing? i didn't even notice the drop this month. i think i kept confusing it with "morning voice" and that just not wearing off throughout the day. :) -- i wash my face morning and night with some clarasil stuff, regular over-the-counter. also, moisturizing with a really sensitive skin stuff (neutrogena) has been really helpful right after fash washing. and i keep my fingers really crossed. i've got a bunch of acne that you can't see in the vid.

[@bbbbakey]

Hey Sam! Wow, major voice drop. I am really surprised how long it takes to settle into a consistent range. Cute outgoing message comparison clip. Looking great--how do you keep your skin so clear? Men's bathrooms smell so rank...SO rank. It never ceases to shock me and I always want to mention it to other guys before I realize that they've never experienced the floral haven of the women's room. Long chain T esters (like Nebido, Reandron) for 6 month shots aren't available in US yet, bummer

[@videokidsam]

@0HeyJude0 thanks jude!! i will totally search around a bit. honestly for me i think anything beats an inch and a half needle myself into my thigh. eep.

[@viewhue]

About figuring out how to sing - you need to place yourself lower down in your throat. You're going for notes that are too high for you now, that will definitely hurt you. At 08:22 you find the right spot for a short while - that's were you need to be now - singing an octave lower than you used to. Try to think of it as what you're doing wrong is turning your chin upwards and pushing out high notes; lower your chin and release the notes, almost as if by relaxation. Practice low vibrating hums.

[@videokidsam]

@BeatlesFan51620 right? oh man the gut. i am actually less bummed about the gut than the lack of diminishing hips. humph. -- glad you like the music! hehe, it was random, just the stuff i've been listening to these days. -- thanks!! excited / getting nervous for top surgery, but mostly incredibly excited!

[@TheSLOfox]

Hey Sam, that's great that you're doing well!

[@Popeslave]

You are freaking hilarious. :) Can't wait to meet you this summer!

[@videokidsam]

@ZeBeFruity thank you!! ooh, good call on the emergen-c, i love that stuff and was taking it regularly for a while and then stopped, but i can't remember why. maybe i ran out... good call though. i'll get back into it.

[@videokidsam]

@MrImportrans it was so scary though! yep, tried with the smaller needles. how do you get yourself to do it? -- nope, i won't be able to be in boston for pride. i'll be around in july, though, after surgery recovering. :)

[@TyGuy1313]

If you take a multivitamin, my doc said the best kind would ones specifically for post-menopausal women. I however, just take gummy vitamins because they are fun and I don't forget to take them =] I got sore throats A LOT my whole first year on T. I think it was just all the changes going on with my vocal chords. It took me 15 months to give myself my own shot...

[@videokidsam]

@bbbbakey BUMMER about the nebido and reandron not being in the US! thank you for that info! i wonder when...?

[@videokidsam]

@YaninBananin hehe, yes hedgehogs do rule, just not on the back of my head. :P thanks about the throat. now i've got some full-blown virus OR allergies. just don't know which. HUMPH.

[@videokidsam]

@viewhue yeah i definitely want to learn more about harmonies and half steps. i just don't know that stuff. you know, i've been trying to find some lower voices and a LOT of cisgendered male singers have really high ranges! the beatles are out of control! ooh, tracy chapman, that does sound relaxing!

[@videokidsam]

@viewhue @viewhue thank you for this advice! i will definitely try the chin thing. yeah, i sometimes still can't tell when a note is going to be too high and then i am already straining by the time i realize its probably not a good idea. the octave lower stuff just seems SO LOW a lot of the time (though i totally agree 8:22 is my favorite) and i wish there were an in between where i could sing that isn't as high as the singer but not a full octave lower and still the right note. does that exist?

[@MrImportrans]

Try Sub-Q in your belly again. It's usually hit and miss (well, unless you used the IM needle for your stomach, then it'll hurt, you need small needles for it) and one can be really painful and the next can be painless.

[@videokidsam]

@TyGuy1313 hey thanks for the thoughts. i think a vitamin is in my future. yeah, i am hoping the throat thing is T related. we shall see...

[@videokidsam]

@angaloo23 mmmm gummy vitamins. yes! -- yeah, i need to do some major investigation about the subQ again. its just been super easy to have my friend do my shot IM in my butt, but i need to be self-sufficient. thanks!

[@videokidsam]

@TheSLOfox thanks!!

[@videokidsam]

@YaninaKramskaya it finally did! it just took swimming in the ocean! the salt water has been amazing. :)

[@videokidsam]

@BlatantGenderFuck hey buddy! thanks for the sweet note. i know you'll find a comfortable space too. each in our own time and own way. :)

[@videokidsam]

@SamC74 THANKS!

[@MrImportrans]

@videokidsam I just don't think about it and push through... sometimes it hurts, but most of the time it doesn't. Hope to see you in july then ;) You sound great!

[@videokidsam]

@eawass thanks!!

[@viewhue]

@videokidsam One that will automatically match the singer no (- in case you're singing along to something, otherwise you can just lower it half a step - if you have access to a guitar and a capo it's easier to fiddled about with that but still have some support and something to match), but you can experiment with harmonies.. Something else to try is singing along with lower voices. hrm... I wonder how Tracy Chapman would work for you - might just help in finding that lower relaxation.. thingy:)

[@videokidsam]

@aaryntalks aw thanks so much for the sweet message, dude! :) yeah things are going great these days. i am really happy. :D i hope you're doing well.

[@YaninBananin]

hedgehogs rule! eh, but I guess maybe not when living on your head…I think I have like 5 little ones burrowing in the back of mine ;) Dawson’s Creek, hell to the yeah, and I’m sorry your throat still hurts :( hope it gets better soon.

[@videokidsam]

@lizliz1225 ah, not a bad solution. i'll keep it in mind. :) wow! time goes so fast! congrats on finishing school!!!

[@angaloo23]

Glad things are going well. One A Day makes gummy vitamins I've seen them at Target Also there are a lot of options for sub Q injections. I know you can do them in your arm which doesn't help with self sufficiency, I guess it also depends on the fat on your body. Good luck with your search for answers there.

[@ZeBeFruity]

you look amazing! i wonder if you might enjoy Emergen-C packets. T Joes has them really cheap.

[@videokidsam]

@Hundkoppel Ah you're really nice! :)

[@pi515]

good luck with ur top surgery this summer, sam! i'll be at the gender odyssey conference too (just registered yesterday!) so hope to run into you there. :) very best.

[@eawass]

ridiculous voice change! congrats sam!

[@angaloo23]

Glad things are going well. One A Day makes gummy vitamins I've seen them at Target

[@Hundkoppel]

Ah you look good! Ah you sound good! Ah I´m so jealous!

[@videokidsam]

@postgender thanks, carson!! :) xo.

[@videokidsam]

@pi515 hey that would be awesome. say hey!!

[@videokidsam]

@FatCDTrans :)

[@MrImportrans]

Oh, and are you still planning on going to the pride parade in Boston the 11th?