Sam's Toxic Family Hits Different As An Adult: Analyzing Her Narcissistic Parents

Sam's Toxic Family Hits Different As An Adult: Analyzing Her Narcissistic Parents | Danny Phantom
Whether you consider Sam Manson’s family toxic or not, there is no doubt that their relationship hits differently now that we’re adults. In Danny Phantom, Sam and her parents couldn’t have been more different from each other. Sam was a goth but her parents were super bright and peppy, and the show never outright explained what made Sam so different from her Mom and Dad. But it could be a sign of something much deeper in their home life. So, the only sensible thing to do right now is to analyze one of the best Nickelodeon shows of all time to see how Sam’s possibly narcissistic parents created an iconic and rebellious Goth Queen.
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[@ghostspider2056]

I once heard of a family that dresses and decorated their house like the 1950s, except for the son because the mom didn’t push it onto him and they respect each other’s interests.

[@kimawhitehawkjordan7714]

I saw it too the young man said as well "yea when i have friends over I tell them yeah mom likes it this way but cmon into my room it's more like me."

[@therealjaystone2344]

Imagine if it’s a religious themed

[@Deadline_83930]

Laci Fay, been following her channel for a few years and they really are living their best lives while respecting their son’s life and choices 🩵

[@marthagilbert3459]

Now that sounds like a real healthy family relationship.

[@tomboyjessie1352]

Oh yeah I think I saw something like that on YT a while back!

[@Essio.Coshibari]

I remembered thinking as a kid, "Her parents are just normal and she's just trying to be edgy and different". As an adult I realize how messed up her parents actually are.

[@TheCartoonCorruption]

same!

[@villamiles]

Well, as a kid I thought they were weird and creepy af so that explained a lot of things 😅

[@lucasmartinez5703]

As a kid, I thought her parents were always condescending.

[@oisinlynch8427]

@@TheCartoonCorruptionSam as her narcissistic moments

[@quincyconnors9391]

​@@oisinlynch8427And we know where she gets it from.

[@brettglover135]

Sam's parents whole entire thing is basically we're rich we're better than everyone else BECAUSE we're rich, SO WHY AREN'T YOU DOING IT TOO?! BE LIKE US SAM!

[@jasonmunozjr]

Didn't they get their comeupments at last?

[@barikareese]

This is how I interpreted their behavior as a kid. Now that I think about it, it's probably because my parents did the same 😢. I related to Sam so much as a kid because your kid's happiness should be more important than the family "image".

[@ballmunch6714]

its litterally a republican family

[@brettglover135]

@@ballmunch6714 no not really, her parents are just a couple of rich snobs that think we have money therefore we better, and their problem with Sam boils down to you are a girl and being a goth isn't real it's just a teen fad and you are rich and you need to act like us because you come from our family which means you should want to flaunt being better than your peers.

[@ballmunch6714]

@@brettglover135 sounds like a Republican mindset

[@DarkLore1992]

It's great that despite their differences, Danny's parents never held anything against Sam. Danny really had great parents.

[@samanthawright9589]

Well they didn't really like her parents, but yeah, they never had a problem with Sam

[@kokichioumatheliar8081]

​@@samanthawright9589for real even Jack prepare a ring for her

[@amethyst_cat9532]

Their poor design and lack of lab safety was responsible for his undeath

[@walterpetersen776]

​@amethyst_cat9532 According to Butch Hartman Ghost World is Earth

[@marthagilbert3459]

Danny's parents are better than Sam's.

[@jillianefaithcobre8637]

Not all goth and edgy person are bad, and they are not always toxic, cynical, and whiny. They’re just fashion emotions and a person they wanted to be.

[@mrsnayarlhats4242]

Some of them are nice people that are gentle as a sheep

[@kaitlinwhite4918]

Most of us are gentle and helpful, even if we're whiny and I wouldn't say we're "cynical" most of us just have an extremely dark sense of humor and it translates as "cynical" to outsiders. Some can be toxic but it usually has to do with upbringing. I'm not trying to make you feel bad or anything I'm just giving my input as a goth person.

[@chubbyninja89]

Well, I have to disagree with that statement, at least from what I've seen. I mean, I find goths to be kind of hilarious, as they want to try to "be themselves" so much that they just become a fad rather than their own truly unique persons. From what I've seen here and there, many goths would've just been better trying to talk things out with their parents and such trusted people instead of trying to mold their persona around being dark and gloomy all the time, as that does in fact make them look ridiculously edgy and such.

[@kaitlinwhite4918]

@@chubbyninja89 some parents just can't be responsible or are stuck in a mindset where blatant insults are "made out of love" and you just cant get through that you don't want to be like them and you're more comfortable being different and having a different opinion of life. Look up "kitchen sink" by twenty one pilots

[@BlackCroft666]

Most people aren't to be honest. There are just some bad apples like everywhere, especially online. People are nicer offline usually especially on festivals.

[@nitzan3782]

Wow, these are all excellent points. I thought they despised Danny because they saw him as an accessory to her "goth phase", but considering he, and especially his parents, gave her the validation she didn't get at home, it might have run deeper. It was always clear she was goth to rebel though.

[@aceblaze2049]

Not only that but even after the reveal of ghost being real his parents, specially his dad was still seen as the town crazies and mess up. They'd very much look down on them and worry what it looks like for their daughter to associate with them

[@michigokuroichi46]

Honestly I always felt Sam and I were kindred spirits. And for me(and I think for her as well) it was never a thought in our heads such as " I want to rebel". It was more of an expression of "If I don't fit your mold, then I am just going to explore myself." And the "gothic""punk" and "alt" have a lot of different colors pallets (though most do include plenty of black) different layers of styles and even a lot of ways to mix and match different peices. Like you can have a smaller wardrobe and still make different styles because of the cross overs in color pallet. Also fo me I just always enjoyed the look of it. In fact I started dressing "goth" way younger that most people ever did, with only mild push back from my mother.

[@andrewdilbeck9842]

Her grandma was the only one who cares.

[@annlouiserainey4888]

I’d call these parents overbearing, overprotective, and even too blind to listen to what their daughter wants in life.

[@loganthomas3575]

and it will lead her to cut them off at one point when Sam becomes an adult

[@gh0stgarbage]

Exactly, trying to attach a stigmatized diagnosis to it just makes people with NPD look like evil abusers- and while untreated narcissists can be, it doesn’t mean they ARE just because they’re struggling with a personality disorder.

[@hajimeyoshinori4161]

100th like

[@talklalala1292]

They only keep eyes on them self

[@benjaminfeld6388]

I'd like to think that, to some degree, Sam's parents may have thought they were actually doing the right thing and trying to keep their daughter on the straight and narrow. But of course that in no way means that they were right.

[@lesterwilliamsjr649]

I think Sam and Gwen from Total Drama would become friends if those shows ever made a crossover.

[@sarahhenry1845]

I believe that. They would have the most awesome horror movie marathon. Now I'm jealous.

[@walterpetersen776]

If Paramount buys the rights from lemon squeeze productions then it would happen.

[@HellVirus0919]

Yes

[@HellVirus0919]

@@lesterwilliamsjr649 oop

[@HellVirus0919]

@@lesterwilliamsjr649 OH YOU MAKE BOOKS?? THATS SICK

[@LadyDragoncat]

They actually thought dressing their daughter up like a Barbie doll made them look like good parents? It's no wonder Sam preferred darker colours. I do, too. Every colour has a place in the spectrum.

[@catbatrat1760]

"Every colour has a place in the spectrum." That's beautiful.

[@katelynthewhitewerewolf6376]

​@@catbatrat1760 I like dark colors too and I like Sam but I don't like her parents and never did.

[@noireisbest6786]

Yea, the obsession with clothes and dressing like them is extremely common with parents and grandparents like this. Like to the point of even insulting you for how you look, even if you look typical for the situation. I usually avoid the term "narcissist" but my grandfather loves to say people are "dressed like clowns". There's that edge of extreme judgment over really trivial things as well an obsession with image. And the more you reject these people and their ideals, it seems like they get angrier and angrier.

[@queenofcats9240]

My oldest sister has always been the one to say something about what I’m wearing. I don’t even have an aesthetic really. I just wear casual clothes mostly but I wear a lot of baggy and shapeless clothes because I feel more comfortable in them. My sister always says stuff like “You’re never gonna find a boyfriend if you don’t show your figure a bit” or “You know all your friends keep you around because they know you don’t dress cute so any boys y’all meet will like them and not you” She’s tried to buy me crop tops and short shorts but I never wear them and she’ll get agitated at me for not wearing them even though I’ll tell her I don’t want them

[@liberty1212]

yep yep yep - my mother was obsessed with my image and style. wore something she didn't like? "you look odd" "people will think you're a fuddy-duddy" "you have to wear skinny jeans"( i have big legs). i could go on, but to this day i still hear those words when i think i look nice, and thus my fashion is very limited. fully self-aware of it but can't break out of it.

[@benjaminfeld6388]

Clowns? Clowns are supposed to dress in bright colors and be funny. So if anything Sam's parents are the ones that were trying to dress their child like a clown.

[@alexisgrunden1556]

I feel like one of the only things Sam's mom got right was the prom dress she got for her. (The first dragon necklace episode) For once, she got something that was exactly her daughter's style, and Sam looked like a vampire queen.

[@cheshirenevande4701]

I hated her parents. They always wanted her to be something she wasn't and wanted her to dress in things she hated. It resonated with me as my family was ridiculously strict and out-of-touch.

[@benjaminfeld6388]

I'm not trying to make excuses for Sam's parents' actions. But maybe at least part of the reason they tried to discourage their daughters actions with because they associated goth clothing and goth lifestyles with witchcraft, or at the very least they thought that if they allow their daughter to continue to rebel she grow up into some sort of criminal. Then again, I could be wrong and it could have just been out of some form of narcissism.

[@ilonashumiha]

@@benjaminfeld6388 Like the Beifongs, they are spoiled and pampered by wealth. They will do anything to look like saints in the eyes of others, but in reality they are not saints at all. For them, as well as for Toph’s parents (“Avatar. The last airbender”), the meaning of life is the motto “Appear, not be”

[@SilverScribe85]

Looking back, I DO commend Sam on being such a rebel in a rather oppressive society like that of Amity Park's. The town has a shallow idea of what beauty is, a corrupt government that puts that of the former president to shame, a record of public school bullying that SHOULD'VE brought the hammer down on Casper High (i.e. close it down) and a slipshod public school system where the teachers essentially let the "popular crowd" do whatever they please. Still, on the other hand...for someone who was all about not conforming to the ways of society, Sam seemed rather eager to have the people of Amity Park conform to what SHE wanted. Seriously, I'm glad vegan-friendly foods have become a lot more various and tasty compared to Sam's "ultra-recyclo vegetarian" preferences. I'd pick an Impossible Burger from Burger King over one of those turf-wiches or tofu soy melts ANY day of the week. Sam's behavior in Phantom Planet was particularly hard to swallow for me, considering how Danny does most of the ghost hunting work (and thus carries more stress than his friends do)

[@HotelKatz]

I think the harder her parents try to make her conform to their ideals, the harder Sam tries to make others conform to her ideals in some sort of trying-to-rebel-by-unwittingly-mimicking-your-parents thing, like a variant of the Horseshoe effect. Her parents try to make her eat meat and they don't like Ultra-Recyclo Vegetarian? She rebels by trying to get others to eat Ultra-Recyclo Vegetarian meals and to take away non-Ultra-Recyclo Vegetarian meals. The reason I think meat is an anger trigger for Sam is her Great-grandfather in-universe-invented the deli toothpick cellophane-twirling device. Her parents don't work, but probably praise the device and meat to the point where it's a real sore spot for her. I'm probably wrong, but I had fun thinking this theory up. I also had to re-write it because KZbin ate the second paragraph.

[@SilverScribe85]

@@HotelKatz In the end, though; most if not ALL of Sam's actions (to me) sometimes come across as rather hypocritical

[@chubbyninja89]

@@HotelKatz Good point. I never watched this show as much as some others, but I do kind of remember Sam doing stuff like trying to force others to accept her views and such, which does come off as very hypocritical if she was trying to be different from her parents and all. I do hate how certain groups try to do the same sort of stuff while trying to shout that they're "tolerant" and "opened minded".

[@nellewoodruff6337]

For real. I thought it was just a case of early installment weirdness from the meat episode but no, she's like that for nearly the whole show

[@SilverScribe85]

@@chubbyninja89 To top it off, many of Sam's efforts to "make the world better" only make things worse (as seen when that lunch lady attacked in Episode One)

[@youngbounty1394]

IMO, I never saw Sam’s parents as being narcissistic, so much as they had issues with being controlling. There are parents with this issue and narcissism often has nothing to do with it. My interpretation is that Sam’s grandmother once lived that lifestyle while raising Sam’s mom or dad (mom most likely since she seems the most controlling). She grew up and was raised under a rebellious and punk mother that dressed her in pinkish, rebellious clothes when all she wanted to do was play with dolls and wear bright clothes. She doesn’t want her daughter to have to end up like the mother that she felt was too controlling and forcing her rebellion on her. As a result, she became no different from her mother while her mother learned to love and accept everyone’s wishes and desires that aren’t hers. I have a headcanon that as Sam gets older, she mellows out due to wanting to stop the cycle of control her mother and grandmother placed on their daughters. Sam learns from her mother and grandmother that she can’t control what happens to her friends, lover or any children she may have. However, she can control her actions and choose to be the mother that nurtures her child and supports whatever they decide to wear or do in life.

[@kaytorasaunders-xq3wt]

I saw someone wants mention that Sam's pushy self-righteous attitude is probably a result of the way her parents had to be pushy towards her never thought of it that way

[@fablethewolf825]

I don't think Sam deserves flak for having character flaws. She's fourteen, still a kid; and kids are not the most easily tolerated group of people by nature. It'd be like labeling a kindergartener as an idiot because he can't solve this complicated math equation that has actual mathematicians stumped. Yes, Karen, your little mini-me is some kind of super-child that was practically born walking and speaking in full sentences, but this is not actually the case for most children.

[@Sonicsgirl13]

Exactly! It drives me nuts seeing folks be like "Sam is toxic" " Sam is awful" She's a 14 year old girl with narcissistic parents trying to find her place in life. While admittedly the choices she makes do at times cause trouble, it only shows that she is imperfect and goes hand in hand with her rebellious nature against her parents as well as society. If it wasn't for Sam, Danny would likely be at a worse spot in his own life; no ambition or drive to try and do better. She does get slightly better as the show goes on and even learns a lesson of her actions as well. She's far from perfect and that's okay.

[@katelynthewhitewerewolf6376]

​@@Sonicsgirl13 I never hated Sam she's one of my favorite characters it's her parents I can't stand.

[@maxinesteuer1959]

I definitely think Sam and her parents were a closed feedback loop - the more they pressured her to be “normal,” the harder she’d go trying to seem unusual and weird, and the more they’d try to control Sam by limiting her options.

[@maxinesteuer1959]

I think that Sam always would’ve been a little odd - her parents wanted a debutante, not an activist, and that was always gonna be a source of conflict. But instead of welcoming or just allowing her interests, they doubled down on trying to turn her into a Barbie doll. Which I bet made Sam even MORE rebellious. Like, what do you wanna bet she was initially just vegetarian, but started coming up with more limitations just to avoid letting her parents make it seem trendy? Would Sam have still gone out of her way to dress dark during the summer heat wave episodes if she didn’t NEED to express herself through clothes? Yes, how you dress is the loudest way to express personality, but it was also something her parents couldn’t take away. Sam would buy her own clothes, or else dye and cut whatever preppy outfits they tried to force on her.

[@Izzy-cp8yt]

Honestly, as a kid Sam was my favorite character, and as an adult I understand why. She had the control and freedom I craved, even if she had to claw her way to having it.

[@carolinemckee7009]

You know, if this show was written today, I feel like Sam's parents would be one of those social-media-families who centers their whole lives around keeping up the persona of a charming 1950's family and turn every aspect of their personal lives into content. Either that or they'd be the heads of the local HOA

[@melaniescribbles]

As an adult goth; Maybe there would be elements of both if there was a modern-day version of this show? Like, Sam's parents DEFINITELY would've been in an HOA alright. 🤣Especially Sam's mom. Just saying; I can 100% picture her actually being friends with the local HOA Karens (because let's face it; HOA's are basically Karen nests). And I could definitely picture Sam just trying to live her life despite her parents literally filming EVERY aspect of their lives at home in their downtime, with her complaining about being filmed without her consent on more than one occasion on the show. Just saying; tell me that you couldn't picture Sam's mom going for a mix between tradwife videos and family vlogger videos; like, she wouldn't be trying to film some 'Cooking breakfast with my daughter!' style video at some point, but Sam would just either just cover the camera with her hand like 'I don't want to be filmed, and I know my rights on that one', or just trying her damndest to make the footage unsuable once her mom gets pushy about it.

[@redmaxxs]

If you think about the grandmother who was rebellious and was probably embarrassing her daughter. Which probably made her reject her mother's behavior made her become proper and she wanted to make sure her daughter Sam didn't become like her mother.

[@levievil9220]

Which failed

[@redmaxxs]

@@levievil9220 True. Which reminds me of Toph. She was a really rebellious laid-back mother which caused one of her doors to be uptight and proper and the other daughter likes her. Either way it's an interesting dynamic. At least you can tell a little Sam parents care for her. So many bad cartoon parents.

[@levievil9220]

@@redmaxxs toon did care just she didn’t want to raise her kids like her parents after all she didn’t like it so she tried a different method

[@loganthomas3575]

Back when I was a teenager, I hated Sam’s parents and I thought they were narcissistic and as an adult, I still think they’re narcissistic.

[@knightwolf9863]

You did a righteous job providing a character analysis between Sam and her parents. Although, I think you forgot about the part were they were very rich and flaunted their wealth in lavish ways. Like, when Sam got sick they hired a medical team to be at her bedside to keep her well.

[@Ren-wi1gf]

Eh. Were her parents excessively controlling? I think they emphasized it but to say that's how it always is it not definitive. Realistically, Sam is a good natured girl, if her parents were truly narcissists, not just have some narcissistic traits, she wouldn't have turned out so strong natured, being a child of narcissists tend to lean towards pleasing their parents for fear of negative reprimandation and psychological gaslighting and punishment. Were they as accepting as Danny's parents? No, Sam's parents care deeply about appearances. However, keep in mind that the grandma still loves her daughter and her flaws, and gives breathing room for Sam when faced with her overbearing parents.

[@kaytorasaunders-xq3wt]

That's one thing Danny and Sam have in common they both come from messed-up families jack and maddie are smart but they let their obsession with ghost cause problems causing Jazz daughter to try to be a parent to Danny and she also has her own problems like being a know-it-all in a busybody imagine what kind of in-laws jeremy and Pam will be like towards danny

[@ofcatsandcrepes2080]

I wonder why her grandmother never stood up to Sam's parents and told them to chill out. Was she afraid of them too? Is one parent more controlling than the other and Ida is quietly trying to get them to stand up for themself too against ther spouse?

[@noireisbest6786]

She is an elderly woman and there's no telling how violent they might get with her or Sam. People in abusive situations aren't always proudly standing up to their abusers with their chest out. Sadly, when you're in that position, you have to do more subtle stuff.

[@stephj505]

Especially since Sam was(presumably) her only grandchild.

[@oooh19]

Her grandmother told her she rebelled when she was younger

[@UniMakesStuffs]

I can't say it's exactly the same as everyone is different but my grandma would often take my side when it came to my mom being a bit mean to me. It all depends on culture and beliefs. It could be keeping relationships together despite the control freak issue. Being in a predicament like that can cause the child to feel conflicted to maintain a better relationship with.

[@rabbitherochlo]

im pretty sure the parents would’ve put her in an elderly home if she spoke up

[@19WolfGirl74]

I always thought that Sam was a teenage oops baby and her parents became toxic as they struggled as teen parents. Maybe they didn’t love each other anymore? Maybe they wanted to force the “picture perfect family” image onto Sam so they could say they were great parents, that they didn’t marry too young, that it was never a mistake. That Sam wasn’t a mistake. And became toxic trying to fix their past through their daughter because she’s probably the only thing holding the family together at that point.

[@doll9340]

I always thought her parents were part of the reason of why she's goth but also just as her personality and to give the show some diversity in characters

[@Jojo-be5im]

I think Sam is a great example on how to make a goth girl character, because not every goth girls need to be MEAN or 'edgy' to look cool, Sam was a goth yeah, but she also had a soft side not many goth girl's have in them. And that too me, is why I think Sam was well written in Danny phantom

[@RinitaChan]

My parents were only a bit similar because they were brighter and perkier, but I was more into a dark aesthetic almost my whole life. Mine - while not always 100% on board with all of my fashion choices - kinda just accepted that this was just my style, I wasn’t depressed, and that gothic style/aesthetics/horror things made me genuinely happy. My mom and dad were a lot closer to Ida Manson, thank god.

[@monkeycat48]

I swear when it came to Sam's parents I really hate them with every atom of my life. They are the definition of narcissistic psychopaths and I wouldn't be surprised if Sam literally broke ties with them as soon as she turned 18. I mean judging by Sam's intelligence she'll probably be doing better without her parents involved in college.

[@kylepennington-hirth9129]

I feel a kinship with Sam. I'm not goth nor have i ever been, but I grew up with narcissistic parents and sister. It was a nightmare. I came out of it alright though because of my amazing friends.

[@montanajackson3713]

I wish ida stood up to Jeremy and Pamela and told them off, plus have her gain full custody of her granddaughter.

[@adriannaranjo4397]

The only sin Sam committed was the lunch menu

[@MegaManDBZX]

It kind of makes sense Sam is as awful as she is when you see her parents.

[@callanightshade8079]

See, I didn't go full out goth in school but I related to Sam. I liked dressing in dark clothes because it made me feel good, I liked creepy dark things, I liked drawing even though I wasn't really an "art kid" I was just myself. I had friends from all over. Some were more gothic, some were just socially awkward like I was. We all found our own ways.

[@Channeleven2345789]

You say narcissistic, I'd say a byproduct of a show played by one-dimensional characters by writers who feared the third dimension.

[@grth-is6xv]

You gotta admit Sam's a bit toxic herself for pushing her ideals on Danny and Tucker

[@Lady-Wendym33]

Yes

[@AnInkStick]

Frankly, she’s just as bad as her parents

[@samanthawright9589]

Well that is understandable considering how this video explains her parents, more or less mimiking them

[@nave712]

True

[@tierefuerimmer9635]

Like how? She stood up for her beliefs but Sam never tried to be outright violent. I mean there was that one time she was brainwashed by Undergrowth

[@TravellerZasha]

I wanna try goth fashion now. Definitely not because I want to rebel against my family after never being allowed to self express.

[@AmeliaBerdel-xv3wp]

I'm glad that the Only family member who accepts her for who she is is her grandmother

[@halloqueen666]

I see a LOT of myself in Sam and her family. Three years ago I started dressing more gothic and my parents did NOT like it. I also come from a fairly wealthy family who cares a lot about image and reputation. They tried buying me clothes they liked, insulted me, judged me. I wore clothes they approved of whenever I was around them and brought my own clothes to change into in my car after I left. There were so many things they forbade me from doing, like getting piercings, getting a motorcycle, getting tattoos...guess who has all three of those things now? I got fed up and started dressing how I wanted to around them, and doing what I wanted to do. And i'm not even a child like Sam either, I was 21 years old when this started. To this day they're still trying to get me to dress the way they want and they hate my look, scowling anytime a family member or friend says something about my look. Still trying to get me to wear what they want. They even tried to get me to take my nose ring out before this Thanksgiving because they didnt want to hear my grandparents complain about it (which they never did, by the way). It's sad they care more about what others think of me (and by proxy, them, according to them) rather than what makes me happy. I don't have a supportive grandmother really but I do have a supportive little brother, he's been my rock and I trust him with anything. So yeah that turned a bit into a rant but in a way, it was refreshing to see a character on the TV screen go through the exact same things I did, and this video was refreshing too. For a time I felt disgusting in my own skin due to my parents. Now I feel confident, free, and, most importantly, like I'm being myself.

[@katarinaclaes96]

I really loved watching Danny Phantom 😁

[@shawnaj72]

I wonder how Jeremy And Pamela are going to react When they find out that there daughter, Sam is dating Danny?

[@DavidJames-mr6rd]

I would say would not want anything of it. But since Danny save the world from a ghost meteor plus all the other times he the town. Everyone would treat them like monsters from the whole town if they don't allow it. So they have to be fine with and get in trouble if they do anything with sam.

[@nicholase82]

​@@DavidJames-mr6rdNot if the new graphic novel is anything to go by.

[@amandaslough125]

​@@nicholase82They might use it as a means of social power, by association, but still just hate Danny.

[@tireddoggamingtales2091]

Yeah they're definitely narcissistic, because frankly if you literally tried to control how your child looks every single day and make them try to match your look that definitely makes you a narcissist. Which goes without saying is not okay.

[@AuroraFlamini888]

Having grown up Goth, I think one of the problems is other people ask why, like something had to have happened that was fundamentally different than other people. Plenty of adverse and traumatic things happen to everyone, but not everyone explores why, and not even everyone who explores why ends up looking a certain way or (to get on my goth box) listening to the genre of music literally called "Goth" and all it's sub genres. Okay, reminding people it's a music subculture with a look associated with it that gets commodified done. Back to stereotypes, no one in my immediate family when I was a teen (my younger brother as an adult changed his mind and I'm proud) liked that music or look. They'd seen it before and heard some Bauhaus back in the day, sure. Had adult friends into it. But they really did worry about what other people would think, and if it meant they were doing something wrong since I wasn't wearing rainbow tye dyes anymore. I think it got to specifically my mom a lot. Especially because I did, like everyone else in the family tbh, have depression too. I think they confused the two pretty hard, and blamed one on the other, and vice versa. Actually, that was one of the worst things to impede any kind of emotional recovery because people were telling me that fundamentally, all the things that brought me joy, and creative abundance, was ruled by depression. I got harassed and treated differently so much for it out of a misunderstanding, that TREATMENT was making me more depressed, not looking that way or listening to that music!!! Having to reclaim everything I love from depression: there are so many many more themes in that music and art to enjoy and save. And trying to not like those things only made me an angry and bitter person pretending I was past it all because I was trying to be mentally better in the ways I was told was "mentally better". Sometimes, we just like the art we like. I never STOPPED being a lovey enthusiastic hippie hearted little girl, I just ALSO had other interests that I personally never saw as being in conflict until people stopped seeing me, and started seeing their preconceived ideas on what someone who LOOKS like me MIGHT be like. This stuff really teaches you important lessons on perception, and how we approach other people.

[@AuroraFlamini888]

I loved this character as a little girl, btw. Thorn is definitely closer to an actual goth on the basis of sounding like Inkkubus Sukkubus in her music. :) Anyone who liked the Hex Girls and how they sounded as a kid should check out Goth Rock from the 90s. I am pretty sure in hindsight it was a reference to them. Mephisto Walz is also fantastic and a classic for a reason.

[@Midnight0Mistress]

When i first saw her parents, i was so disappointed because there was the episode where she said that her parents bought her a dress for prom and it was a beautiful gothic design and it made me think that her parents were awesome people. And then i get these people...

[@NeverSober8008]

It’s just one-dimensional writing, they didn’t give the parents any depth as characters in the show. They were just props for Sam’s character as a teenage goth rebel.

[@cheshiretiger5698]

Sam also has a short ponytail perhaps as an omage to her grandmother

[@armorbearer9702]

The irony is that Sam's great grandfather would probably be like Danny's parents. A kooky inventor that is dedicated to his craft.

[@greyworld6242]

Honestly this still doesn’t make me care for Sam. Sorry.

[@diamondly6250]

the whole video is him just repeting himself like 30 times

[@hardworkerforlife4081]

Wish they made a college version this show felt like it could have went on for years

[@natashagc467]

Damm i feel her, my parents are the same but a bit less intense yet when they try to make me where somthing that I didn't like just because it looke "prettier" or that they wanted me to change because they did't like the colors, I would kind get mad at them and shout then storm out..... Then I would feel bad for doing that and apologizes (or they would guilt trip me into apologize)

[@MoonshineTheDragThing]

Is nobody gonna point out how Sam's eyes don't have pupils?

[@alexdeghost2729]

These two do actually have a good moment. Not joking, they both willingly attempt to volunteer to more than likely die wearing the Ecto-Skeleton.

[@Phantomx1989]

I don't think there was a lot to think behind the scenes, even if there's was some continuity, Danny Phantom was more an episodic show, so probably this was just a joke, putting a goth like Sam with the bright parents just to make a joke with how different the parents were with the daughter The grandma being supportive was probably just the typical "grandma is always on grandkid side" kinda of thing Maybe there's was some deep writings for Sam's family, but since this show was episodic and before the more deep cartoons of today, will say that this was more for the joke

[@joshuaking3731]

There are a few things youre missing, i think youre on the right path, but slightly missing the mark. That being I dont think they were fully narsasistic. They had narsasistic tendencies, but werent full blown narsasists. 1) They did dislike Danny, but Sam was allowed to pretty much do whatever she wanted, including hanging out with Danny. The only time they interfeared was when they felt Danny was really dangerous, or the one negativly influencing their daughter. 2) Danny Phantom takes place in the early 2000s, a time when boomer parents, who were stuck in their ways, had a hard time understanding their children if they were a little different. Rebellion was high. In fact, the goth craze was very similar to the punk phase of the 90s. Shes just very uncomfortable with how bright and cheery her family is, so goes to the oposite extreme. 3) This is the big one, that might actually explain everything. Sams family was loaded. Extremely wealthy. Her parents atritude is very similar to rich families trying to avoid embarasment from the other rich families. Sams grandma is also telling when it comes to their families wealth. They could be new money. Newly wealthy people who are trying increadably hard to fit in with high society, and their daughter simply rubs against that. So they try to make her look like she fits in. The dresses arent even what anyone from that era would wear. More like 1950s country club. Almost like its what someone new to money thinks wealth would look like. Like I said. I dont think they are complete narsasists. But they do have narsasistic tendancies.

[@icecreamhero2375]

She could be friends with Robbie from Gravity Falls. LOL

[@ellesandralady8596]

Danny's parents never had moth Sam or her choice of clothing or anything about her. But even when I watched the show, her parents are nuts because they show no support of anything when they are on screen

[@Tony-zm8ns]

To be fair; I don’t think that anyone who liked pink or those styles would ware those outfits.

[@renanel8915]

Even when I was a kid, I saw something was off with her parents judging by the bright colors and overly-happy expressions they wore. But I couldn't figure out what.

[@domobfdi5480]

I always have to wonder why these kinds of moments hit so differently as an adult.

[@roxanne1762]

I think Sam loves her grandma more

[@LegendStormcrow]

Girl boss, gate keep, gas light. Why apply those to Sam? That's the mother. It's all toxic.

[@universal1771]

I don't think her parents were toxic maybe narcissists but they most just wanted to protect their child from something they seen as bad. Honestly it seems that people like you think you can do whatever you want without judgement. Maybe try seeing it from the parents perspective.

[@HeadFullaStuffin]

Sam's parents may also be caught up in that "Keeping Up with the Joneses" mentality, given that the Manson family is clearly VERY wealthy. The society lifestyle that tends to come with that amount of generational wealth has a certain preppy, proper aesthetic attached to it. Sam may be rebelling against that moreso than her parents being diagnosibly narcissistic. This also better explains the disdain her parents have for Danny and Tucker, given that neither of them are in the same tax bracket. Sam wants to be more normal and down-to-earth, whereas her parents may want to only be around other high society folks. If i remember correctly, they were instantly enamored when they met Vlad, further solidifying that they only make friends with their wallets in mind.

[@DroseraNara]

I dunno, they were always creeps to me, but I was raised by a goth so I guess I got that 'toxic positivity is bad' lesson early.

[@tessamitchell7597]

Yikes! I can relate to Sam, even though it’s much harder to deal with when you have divorced parents and one parent who’s narcissistic and the other parent is an anxious parent. Just toxic tendencies all around. Imagine that on top of having a disability that you were born with.

[@maskyisabadass3355]

When I was a kid I never liked Sam's parents and need help. I become goth when I was a teen and still am now I am a adult now. I now can wear black and skull themed look since my mom wouldn't let me.

[@raven3067]

I think Sam's natural hair was blond. But her being can only mean that she dyed it black.

[@cierrafriend2185]

Sounds like Sam is a lot more like her parents than she thinks. Her grandma is a mega rebel. Her parents like order. The opposite of what her grandma would have raised them into (whichever one is her kid). Everyone in this family is lowkey a badass rebel and dont even know it. Rebel by doing the normal stuff and your rebel mom is confused why you want rules. Grow up and now your kid is suffocating under your rules. Cycles.

[@PastelPrinceVT]

I didn't really read them as narcissistic from how the show portrayed them. Narcissism relies on the idea of their own egos and sense of superiority/inferiority being fed by these controlling actions and how others perceive them. Having grown up with a narcissistic parent, in the privacy of one's home, there would be no need for the pretense of love or care from her parents. I think they were just really socially conforming parents who tried their best but weren't helping the situation. However, Sam as a character became who she wanted to be as a result of this. I see it as well intended but misguided parenting

[@the1magageneral323]

Sam herself is a narcissistic person, she is a hypocritical soapbox character. Sam rebels just to spite her parents.

[@Commentsurveillance]

Sam is only a metaphor for Vladimir Lenin, it’s obvious

[@Ando1428]

Never intended to hurt someone and going to hurt someone are very different. Her very entitled attitude let her think it was a good idea to let loose a 400 lb purple back gorrilla. She knew best she did action without thinking of possible consequences. Good thing sampson is a good guy.

[@alexisdominey6487]

We need a compatlrison of Sam's parents and Robbie's from Gravity Falls. Even though we see very little of them, they seem to be far better than hers.

[@althea_sirius]

I feel like she would've ended but being the girl boss goth queen we know anyway but the way her parents are only pushed to do so even more. So a little bit of both. I wouldn't have been surprised if her grandma became her primary guardian in the show if they had gone that route.

[@iinsomniick]

i loved danny phantom as a kiddo and i don’t remember ever seeing sams parents 💀

[@helRAEzzzer]

It's teenaged rebellion. She's the archetype of teenaged rebellion. Teens who rebel, typically, are just trying to find an identity separate from their parents. It's not that deep. Speaking as someone who had a controlling father, teens who DON'T rebel are the ones holding up the "help me!!" signs. Unless you want to walk right into more abuse, you do NOT rebel.

[@Ando1428]

Her parents not liking danny are mostly based on danny parents. Jack and maddy are known as the town loon and crazy person. They have a bad reputation.

[@matthewfranks2198]

Glad she had her grandma to support her

[@MrRonald327]

It helps explain Sam’s attitude.

[@Shockerpitzwei]

1:47 Something tells me the name Pamela manson. Is a double reference right there.

[@andrewkind2820]

Are they even her real parents her hair and eyes are completely different from either of them

[@davidcase8635]

Timmy's parents would get along with them.

[@TheMrfoxguy]

People who are usually always cheerful and happy havevsome demons deep down and are a time bomb like when ned flanders blew up in the hurricane neddy episode

[@nghstudios65]

Now that is some borderline "Breakfast Club" level stuff right there. And I've only seen The Breakfast Club once.

[@LordSiravant]

Her parents were definitely narcissistic control freaks, and wanted her to be more like them because her rebellious ways were an insult to their pretty perfect image. Unfortunately, like with many real-life children of narcissistic parents, she's internalized some of those traits, such as trying to force her own views on others, but because she's still only 14 years old, she's not mature enough to reflect on the fact that she's more like her parents than she would want to admit. This is actually common in children raised by narcissists. There's even a term for it: FLEAs, or Frightening Lasting Affects of Abuse. Basically FLEAs are maladaptive behaviors abuse victims unconsciously pick up from their abusers. Sam was honestly in a similar position as me: control freak parents and a more supportive grandmother who would try to subvert them whenever possible.

[@laurabentz7898]

Amazing video 😊

[@aeoifjapefijl]

I love being reminded of how awesome this show really is haha

[@ericastones1052]

I got 1950s vibes from them and I hated them pushing their ways onto her. I am a goth I respect Sam being true to yourself a thing I had to wait until I got into college I was able to be free.

[@sohanarahaman8070]

Man I agree with this, honestly with this does video about Sam’s parents and Danny Phantom.

[@kingdae2022]

Kinda like a constant fight between Spencer’s/ hot topic and Abercrombie and fitch lol

[@NottheReal]

Dam this was kind of sad..

[@mileslugo6430]

The fact that she still wears black on black. I don't think Sam's parents are all that controlling.

[@Frankibunny]

Sam's parents freaked me out they look like 50s zombies to me

[@penieweenieselenie7435]

Stay true to yourself, even if everyone tells you you're not good enough

[@spookyanimecatloving101]

I remember being a kid, my folks are just very different from each other I mean I knew my folks were messed up I just didn’t realize how messed up like for a sample mother is fact controlling in an way at times but in an same time she is fact supported in an way I think 💭 because we remind her so much of her in an way, my father is will is him but he does in fact support my choices in life even if he doesn’t like it I know he’ll support it no matter what he mean he’s Coolio with it + he doesn’t Idc yeah, anyways, my folks my be different from each other but they do in support me and my siblings no matter what cost in an way yeah and the person I was very close to she was also very supportive of me and my siblings yeah, go sam!.

[@mrsnayarlhats4242]

Well as 26 year old adult I do still live with my parents but they don't like me taking to people online but I rebelled in silence basically without any violence or brute force I learned to keep my mouth shut and eyes peeled and my finger on the tablet off button and ear buds in the ears if I'm having a major problem on the internet with someone who keeps harassing me or keeps making new accounts to harass me with then it's time to delete my accounts and hide and I stay in my room with the tablet and I always listen for movement and telling little white lies to keep things safe

[@mrsnayarlhats4242]

And so far I made awesome friends and I got lover who is 22

[@Markus2E5I6]

If Ida was such a rebel how did her son/daughter become such preppy people? Did she raise him/her differently?

[@crazygamer_1082]

Some people are just different than their parents it’s not too weird. Plus Ida probably had a change of personality because of her kids. After all, you can’t run around living your best life with a kid to look after. It’s irresponsible 😂

[@oooh19]

Nope not all parents are the same and so many people are different than their parents and maybe even their spouses or peers influenced their styles and behaviors

[@cheshirenevande4701]

I believe it was Sam's mom. She was bright and peppy and hated her mom's tendencies. So, she pushed it onto Sam in an attempt to rewrite her own past.