Sardonicast 173: The Substance, Borderlands, Cabin Fever

[@eugeneimbangyorteza]

The Substance felt like a South Park episode with the skin of a body horror movie. I'm kinda surprised it's not marketted as a dark comedy.

[@michaelstrong5383]

That's a really brilliant description of the movie. I laughed at how insane the last half hour of it was.

[@THELIVINGSEB]

I didn’t know anything about the body horror, or the comedy, when I went into it - but I loved the surprise and honestly wouldn’t have it any other way

[@SallyMankus130]

The reason it doesn't quite work is because it's weirdly cartoonish and yet not cartoonish enough in order for it to be dark comedy. It's like there's always this self serious idea sprinkled over everything which prevents it from entering the fully comedic zone. If it was kind of poking fun at how obvious and silly the metaphors were, then it would be more successful.

[@rashbeep]

i definitely heard the south park ending credits music at the end

[@yggdrasil2]

OMG I had the exact same thought while watching it lol. It reminded me of episodes like Goobacks or Red Man's Greed where the characters constantly make the wrong choices in bizarre situations.

[@MrBump2]

The Substance might be my favorite thing I have seen this year. Loved it.

[@Dethmaster64]

Lionsgate releasing The Crow (2024) right after Borderlands is one of the greatest cinematic one-two flops ever

[@1997residente]

Megalopolis: Make it 3

[@CrimeFighterFrog]

@@1997residenteMegalopolis can’t be that bad

[@alexanderfreeman3406]

Lionsgate are at least smart enough not to spend their own money on that garbage.

[@slimnave4846]

​@@CrimeFighterFrog lol

[@CrimeFighterFrog]

@@slimnave4846 no way 😭

[@archive6094]

The Substance is probably the first time I've smiled at a horror movie in years

[@zacharysieg2305]

That third act was the perfect culmination of everything it set up, and it tickled me that one of the special thanks credits went to “All the extras in the theater that got sprayed with blood!”

[@legochickenguy4938]

tons of smiles but also very disturbing. great movie

[@MM-jc7uv]

Horror? It was really a dark comedy, literally nothing scary about it. I feel like horror and body horror aren’t really the same genre at all in a lot of cases

[@DantinozMC]

@@MM-jc7uv I found it very disturbing, although I'm not a regular horror connoisseur. Memento mori.

[@lostielizzie]

Sometimes I can still hear Ralph's echoey, broken, microphone laugh.

[@zeebooboo9663]

The ghost of Yankee Jim I miss him too

[@mabusestestament]

Why did he leave?

[@Grogeous_Maximus]

@@mabusestestament Drugs.

[@lostielizzie]

@@mabusestestament Things just were never the same after him and Alex argued about sports for that one episode, very sad.

[@TLPlays123]

​@@lostielizziewhat episode was that?

[@landminelover926]

Watching The Substance in a packed theatre was one of the best experiences I've had with a movie in years. Everyone was cackling during the whole last act, it was awesome

[@adamlouie1503]

I love how timeless the Substance is, like it feels like it exists in both 2024 and in the 70s. Similar to how something like Bottoms feels like it takes place in the 50s but has the dialogue of 2023 while being a 2000s type of film

[@PauLtus_B]

Bottoms is a movie from a genre that's probably best left in the past. …but then it's actually so much fun. It's good proof that basically any type of movie can work given enough effort.

[@mabusestestament]

Wait what, Bottoms? That ‘female fight club’ movie? How is that not clearly a 2020s movie?

[@BSBSDerivative]

​@@mabusestestament I think the exaggerated football culture of the film i.e. Principal openly abusing students over football is what they meant by 1950s But idk I've not been to America maybe it is like that

[@PauLtus_B]

@@mabusestestament The story is built around the main characters setting up a ludicrous plan trying to get laid. That's very 2000s horny teen sex comedy. "That ‘female fight club’ movie?" Have you actually watched it?

[@capsjukebox]

Alex’s opening just sound like MK ULTRA trigger phrases for mass shooters

[@cirquedemonday]

Lmao

[@phoenix2903]

You got me with that one 😂

[@CirclesForever]

The Substance reminded me of Titane, so I looked it up and both directors went to the same french film school at the same time (La Fémis) which probably doesn't mean that much but I felt validated for thinking of Titane when watching The Substance

[@christucker7655]

Weird how I watched Titane for the first time the day before the substance complete coincidence

[@sammahoney9343]

They also both had really promising, solid debuts that gave us a small taste of the insanity that their sophomore films would bring. Hyped to see what “Alpha” will be

[@dayoldbaguettes]

I believe the special effects director (? Not sure of exact title) was the same too!

[@danieltrevinoc]

You could've tricked me into thinking Ducourneau directed The Substance until the 3rd act started

[@Ripcookiethief]

That's a good find CirclesForever. Thanks for sharing.

[@talesfromthetrip]

It’s an amazing feeling when I see a great film and Adam loves it too

[@redbeard8846]

I always thought Eli Roth is Zachary Quinto. Never seen them in same room so... Suspicious!

[@michaelstrong5383]

It's time to talk about the most nauseating film of the year that makes you question what went on inside the director's head when they made it. Oh, and also The Substance as well.

[@V2Itself]

I saw the substance twice in theaters and am liking going to see it again. I genuinely believe it may be my new favorite film

[@jonfro-mez]

"This one would be good to see with your family" -Alex, talking about the substance. I actually did see it with family, I went with my Mum to an early screening here in Australia. She said she enjoyed the movie and related to it a bit. She's not famous but still feels pressure by society to look younger and also doesn't like her body starting to get frail.

[@1997residente]

Eli Roth was LUCKY enough to say yes to Inglorious Basterds when Adam Sandler said NO By the way, Roth was one of many who tried to cancel Jonathan Glazer after his oscar speech against Israel.

[@luiginastro8831]

Adam Sandler as the Bear Jew would've been... interesting.

[@snowballthepro2926]

​@luiginastro8831 I would've loved to see it, but it was either that or Funny People. Shame we couldn't get both.

[@Ragnarok540]

Adam Sandler said no a Tarantino movie??? Not sure if that's impressive or disappointing.

[@artkub5396]

And it wasn't even against Israel itself. What a loser.

[@Dog-999i]

And Israel did not return the favor to Eli Roth. Nobody wants to see his trash.

[@Slugthing]

I was at the Midnight Madness for The Substance too, my pals and I got to sit right behind the director which was pretty crazy

[@ChicanerDiMarty]

So far, The Substance is the best movie I've seen this year. I don't think I've ever felt so overwhelmed by the end of a movie. I say this in the most grotesque and fun way possible.

[@slimnave4846]

It's a real shame Ralph forgot to "switch" every 7 days...

[@Tyler.the.contentcreator]

RIP Ralph. It’s a shame he couldn’t cross the Borderlands

[@Dethmaster64]

He used The Substance and is now stuck as Macon The Let’s Player for a week

[@Dog-999i]

He got deported to Megalopolis.

[@ashcrimson5148]

LMAO I don't think I'll ever get tired of these.

[@SamWill1999]

I love Cabin Fever and thought his Thanksgiving movie from last year was solid

[@fromvault801]

I've played about 4,000 hrs of Borderlands and had no intention of seeing the film. So I appreciate your suffering. Kevin Hart drank pee I guess Wondering if Eli Rother was just a director for hire so that he could get funding for Thanksgiving

[@Stardonis]

I appreciate your podcast name. This makes me proud.

[@shitpostheavy]

Caught this comment. Good one

[@FilmFallon]

I ran the Berlin marathon in agony while listening to this episode. Thanks for the help 🩷

[@Abcd-up3us]

Saw The Substance in a late night viewing, in a completely empty theater, absolutely amazing experience. Amazingly weird and incredible movie. Especially more creepy at points because of being in a cold empty theater. I thought a little bit gratuitous with the nudity, but I will say, Sarah Qualley is a drop dead gorgeous woman. And that scene when she opens the door to talk to the neighbor guy, I literally said “oh my god” a couple times out loud during that scene because she’s that pretty. But I do wanna say, while the overlying theme everyone talks about is about infatuation with youth in Hollywood and how it’s messed up, the real theme I felt, is about the cycle of addiction and self hatred. How addiction seems from an outside perspective compared to the first person perspective of an addict. And how it can overtake your life more and more over time, and ruin your life.

[@somerandolad]

Borderlands left me feeling bored... erlands.

[@tofutoph]

It didn’t give you cabin fever and make you want to take the substance.

[@danielkoegler7773]

The substance shot to my top 5 of all time so fast it’s unbelievable

[@longlivethesheet4561]

The Substance deserves all the love it’s getting and more

[@dmwoods5]

It felt like David Cronenberg decided to remake Death Becomes Her haha. Good movie!

[@Jezzascmezza]

The discussion about "ending explained" content around 1:54:00 made me think about clickbait 2.0. Or it's like evolved clickbait. The title says something so thunderously obvious that you think to yourself that surely the answer can't be so simple, and then you click, then you find the answer is that obvious, and nothing matters anymore because they have your click. I saw an article for 'Scarface ending, explained' once and nearly slammed my head through my desk.

[@Jezzascmezza]

(like, I love the Scarface ending, but anyone who's seen it knows how straightforward and direct the ending is. The only interesting angle I guess you could take is exploring how that PS2 videogame boldly rewrote the ending)

[@oops6876]

There was only 5 people in my audience for the Substance which bummed me out. I would’ve loved to see it with a packed crowd

[@snarkcast483]

Alex sounded schizo there in the beginning.

[@DooF_Moppet]

It sounded like an Alex Soundboard filled with stuff he never said before

[@WiloPolis03]

Legit sounds like an AI bot given a voice, like JackGPT

[@cringusmoss9937]

That's Adam's voice at the beginning.

[@Yandings]

@@cringusmoss9937 He's talking about how Alex just started Rattling off Borderlands quotes in the first minute

[@cringusmoss9937]

@@Yandings I was making a joshua

[@KERSTEN27]

Razzies for Cate Blanchett, Jamie Lee Curtis and Kevin Hart

[@edge1rated2superstar]

For Lady Gaga and Todd Phillips

[@KERSTEN27]

@@edge1rated2superstar Big razzies for these two.

[@Transmission_Rory]

Regarding that "Woke that detracts from viewing experience" question, you lads mention the most common example of filmmakers not being sincere with the diversity. But one that I see here or there is when a filmmaker firmly believes in what they're getting across, but botches it in the final product. Black Christmas 2019 would be one of them, but others like Charlie's Angels, Bros, and Don't Worry Darling are some that spring to mind for me. Bros because it was a case of Billy Eichner trying to be a leading Rom-Com man, even though he lacks the likability or humbleness to pull it off (Not to mention how he blames straight people for the film bombing even though there were other factors at play). Don't Worry Darling because it had no clue on how to handle its feminist commentary (Trying to be a satire on Jordan Peterson using an "allegory of the cave" format, even though the story is riddled with plot holes and taking bits and pieces from superior works of art). There's just a level of narcissism and hubris when you see these projects come up, with those involved thinking that because they're catering to a certain identity that they've got in the bag, when there's a lot more that has to be done to win the crowd over. Something like the Barbie film knew that alienating the audience wasn't the right move, as it could sour the release (Like what happened with Ghostbuster 2016).

[@deadsaneartistfreelancer3281]

I saw The Substance last night. It was indeed a great fun watch. the 2 hours flew by, it was that entertaining. I wonder if a sequel is possible?

[@killaspongebob666]

Adum honey I'm sorry the substance isn't getting a nom

[@cros_nest]

Children's television show movie is such a good way of thinking of Borderlands. I saw it in theaters & there were two young boys (10 or 12 year olds I would guess) in front of me that had an absolute blast. They were trying to get everyone to clap at the end.

[@-k-b-]

The real genius moment of this movie was the young doctor's "Matrix" being an old husk. Felt very Lynchian. A lot of moments throughout this movie reminded me of Mulholland Drive in particular. I'm glad we still get movies like this! Surrealism taken to the extreme!

[@Redditfanboy-v2s]

Great video bro

[@PauLtus_B]

Why isn't Borderlands an animated movie on like half the budget?

[@auriculus3058]

The Substance should be nominated for Editing Cinematography Production Design Actress (Demi Moore) Makeup Sound Director Costume Design and probably also for Supporting Actress / Actress (Qualley) Supporting Actor (Quaid) Screenplay

[@lukec6d9]

The editing was actually perfect in every way

[@operation_turtle]

It's easily one of the best made films

[@zacharysieg2305]

YES Yes to all of these!!

[@auriculus3058]

Qualley for Actress or Supporting Actress? I think she deserves Actress but then she'd have to compete against Moore

[@slimnave4846]

@@auriculus3058 original score

[@TimPortantno]

52:36 "Uwe Boll" would have made a better movie" was literally my first thought when the review started

[@iamnotthatguy7166]

gearbox has some balls to announce the 4th game immediately after the release of this thing.

[@ivanskoric1168]

i'm sorry Alex, but Kramer and George are way funnier characters than Elaine, not even close bro

[@Dog-999i]

They’re all funnier than Jerry the pedo though.

[@-AtomsPhere-]

No way

[@ColombianThunder]

RIP Ralph. Cabin Fever

[@stringer4434]

Cannot wait to hear the megalopolis discussion

[@zeebooboo9663]

I love the borderlands games and i think an eight episode animated series showing the fall of New Haven and the rise of Handsome Jack would've been cool, showing the events leading up to Borderlands 2. Borderlands is hyper animated and colorful anyways and they could've used the og voice cast and I'd be happy. Didnt even see this movie.

[@attackofthecopyrightbots]

Ties to tales would be cool too

[@BuddhaBot]

42:25 Titular character? Does Alex think Kate Blanchetts characters name is Lilith Borderlands?

[@pfergee]

To lightly defend Eli, Thanksgiving (2023) was pretty rad

[@Michael-cv5wk]

Guys lets not forget that the movie with a "jumping on a butt plug" scene won best picture

[@gabesinclair1401]

the substance was amazing. horrifying, hilarious, morose, and everything inbetween. i might have to see it again before it leaves theaters.

[@skellybean8659]

For me seeing The Substance in theaters was the perfect experience.

[@Jezzascmezza]

Alex's mix-up at 1:49:44 made me realize how similar Ralph Fiennes and Christopher Eccleston look

[@SonicHaXD]

57:09 I think Alex was thinking of Forspoken XD

[@martinavila7401]

Didnt like the Subtance all that much but some moments were funny.

[@Tyler.the.contentcreator]

RIP Ralph. It’s a shame he used too many substances

[@andrewbaillargeon1459]

Alex was giggling like a school girl this episode. Good stuff

[@kinnykiran]

Joe Abercrombie is one of the best fantasy author existing now.

[@noho_hank7627]

Was I the only one who was reminded of the Rat King from last of us part 2 when I saw the monster in the Substance?

[@TheVarietyVendor]

I hope not. It's perfect as a stand alone.

[@bottlemanic]

The substance is my film of the year. Best film I've seen since RRR

[@DinDagaw]

Blanchett and Curtis characters are 20 years old in games

[@Tyler.the.contentcreator]

Looks like the Cabin Fever got to Ralph. May he rest in peace

[@ethanwalker1459]

I've not laughed so hard at a movie in a long time till the ending of this film

[@Hulksterx]

The substance was like a feature length Tales from the crypt episode. Very different movies but it blew Furiosa out of the water in my opinion.

[@josephirizarry5195]

Very true, that was one thing that came to mind during my first viewing

[@josephirizarry5195]

I was also reminded that Demi Moore was also in an episode of Tales From the Crypt

[@brosephdudeguy]

Thanksgiving (2023) is pretty close to having that cabin fever badness schlock. Not as funny but still fun.

[@VIDEOgameDROME]

You guys gonna cover Strange Darling? It was shot on 35mm FILM! 😂

[@shitpostheavy]

HOW HAVE THEY NOT COVERED THIS YET

[@knightfallprotocol]

The people talking about the substance online are not doing it any favors. I had no interest in watching it because all i heard was that it was gorey and gross and theres body horror and blah blah blah. And i immediate assumed that it would be another terrifier type movie where they use gore to cover up the fact that the plot and characters are as interesting as drywall. After watching it for myself, man does this movie make the terrifier movies look like they were made by children.

[@mhgyrosteel463]

best part of the movie was demi moore and the soundtrack . everything else was a mess .

[@sjoerddondersteen1337]

1:38:18 real recognize real S/O Chris Gay Gun & The Snark Tank Bois

[@ColombianThunder]

50:45 Joe Abercrombie is the writer of the First Law book series. He's quite good. Had nothing to do with Borderlands.

[@danielaxc2900]

I'ma let y'all finish, but John Carpenter talking about Reagan was the best movie review of all time.

[@waylander-su7og]

Lionsgate also signed an agreement to let AI train on their library so that's some more money for them.

[@attackofthecopyrightbots]

I mean I could tell he was quoting the movie in the beginning even if I haven’t seen it guys

[@sassytabasco]

"If Fallout can be a good show, this could have been good." See I don't know if I agree there. Fallout was good off the back of a cannon that actually like... Has some good writing. I mean not lately, but you know what I mean. There's a lot of viddy games with "good stories" from the late 2000s and early 2010s that kind of get away with having horrible stories and characters, but gamers don't care because it's a video game. Uncharted, Gears of War, Mass Effect, Fallout 3... Like, these are the kinds of scripts that would get you laughed out of the writers room for a SciFi channel original movie. But the game's industry just has lower standards for that sort of thing. A movie adaptation of Borderlands is a baffling idea, because it's kind of the worst of all worlds. Even when people like the characters, it's more of a memetic kind of appreciation. Like, oh, the character said a quip in the background while I was shooting raiders, haha fun-e. It's like, early 2000s webcomic humor. So trying to adapt that storytelling style into a medium that demands such a concretely linear narrative? A narrative that demands that the quips are now the POINT OF THE STORY?? That seems nigh impossible. It'd be like casting Timotheé Chalamet and Tom Holland to play Gabe and Tycho in a live action Penny Arcade movie. I mean this is the game that has a double rainbow easter egg. I don't know what they were expecting.

[@sabe11a39]

The Substance WILL win best Hair/Makeup

[@C.G.Jr.]

18:28 - i did lol, saw the film with my mom 🤓 my father just died & we gotta take the edge off somehow

[@livchamps9573]

Kate Blanchett as the titular character, Kate Borderlands

[@hpalpha7323]

I thought Tiny Tina was really funny the first time I played Borderlands 2

[@Asherbw]

day #34644 of waiting for a Caché discussion

[@esotericVideos]

57:40 Adum, I don't think calling out Eli Roth on his age is helpful. People's age doesn't define them, and insulting them over that really isn't fair cuz it's not like anyone can do anything to change their age. I think the same message could be achieved if you just say Eli Roth seems very out of touch and unfunny. Adding on this "and he's also old which makes him lesser" seems unnecessary.

[@ddash96]

A funny t shirt idea i have is if adum n alex were drawn goofy doing the siskel ebert thumbs up thumbs down post. Or at least something similar if they could get in trouble for that

[@MrSpoodersaurus]

My brother hates everything Borderlands

[@pattyayyy]

Voiceless sounds like it’s got randy written all over it

[@lukas4112]

I felt that The Substance was very surface level and substance-less ironically lol. It’s messaging is totally dated already

[@PhantomicGekko]

Yeah. I'm really confused if everyone saw a different movie than me.

[@burgerpocalypse]

what if eli roth was actually eli goth???

[@Dog-999i]

PANCAKES!!! No pancakes!

[@YungKofta]

Sardonicast dad hats please

[@grkpektis]

@19:46

[@Dog-999i]

Lionsgate and Sony are easily the worst studios in Hollywood! They just dump out diarrhea after diarrhea and call them “movies”.

[@AnimeGIFfy]

the substance for me felt way too long and repetitive.

[@eviee9693]

Might've been the uncomfortable seat or my need to pee but I wouldn't have minded if 20 minutes was trimmed from The Substance.

[@LuckeGabriel]

The Substance will fix that.

[@johnwise9811]

Day 85 of asking for an episode on the Evil Dead trilogy

[@originoflogos]

Who deleted my comment??

[@mindlander]

Me.

[@VIDEOGEDDONx]

Things haven't been the same since Tom Hooper sent that pack of cats to s*#!!*@$ and p*#+%! Ralph for his take on Cats (2019). Wherever you are Ralph just know we love you 😢

[@mediaikonz]

Tiny teena... Oh kevin hart? 😂

[@tonywords6713]

The Trump biopic was in production for like the better part of ten years and clearly isn't a "conservative movie" lmao

[@giorgiopayne2875]

I mean this with all due respect, but Adam only thinks that knock knock is the worst film ever made because he is gay haha. dont get me wrong, i think its a bad movie too but atleast there were 2 very attractive leads and some very funny moments

[@tofutoph]

I’ve never seen it but I realized Ana de armas (the girl from Blonde) is in it lol.

[@eamk887]

Implying that if he was attracted to the two main leads, he would like the movie all of the sudden...?

[@giorgiopayne2875]

@@eamk887 i didn't say he would like the movie all of a sudden. i literally said i think its a bad movie too. i just doubt that he would think that it is 'the worst film ever made'

[@attackofthecopyrightbots]

Damn Adam I know you don’t know who Joe Abercrombie is cos you don’t read fantasy but jeez dont gotta act like his existence doesnt matter

[@SallyMankus130]

"Cronenberg is still making movies, just not good movies." Yeah, his last film The Shrouds is far better than The Substance.

[@funkychicken4509]

Noooooooooo

[@ashcrimson5148]

I thought his last film was Cosmopolis.

[@HorseJoint]

“The Substance”. Best Horror film of 2024 so far

[@stevebutters306]

I do love yall but when you talk about politics I have to bounce. It's guy who sounds like he has no political opinions on anything talking to a blatant lefty. I love both of you, I don't mean that in any way as an insult, you do you, but it doesn't spawn the most productive discussion. I do appreciate you criticizing the conservative films you mentioned based on actual merit, or lack thereof, however. Thank you for not just smacking them down as evil rightoid bigotry.

[@mindlander]

Haha so you didn't bounce.