SECRETS FROM MY BABY-GAY DIARY

[@debbie7989]

"it's juliet and androgynous juliet" im crying

[@KearaGraves]

i died when i read it😭😭😭

[@edelweston5068]

@@KearaGraves don't CYE u are so cool

[@noonelooksatusers]

XXDDD

[@the_zster_official]

lol i wish i was androgynous!

[@eddiespaghetti2734]

so did all lesbians go through not being able to get over their first real gay crush????

[@conlon4332]

YES YES YES YES. I was seriously obsessed! I literally couldn't imagine my life without obsessing over her! It was A LOT. I'm not proud of it, and I wanted to get over her for months - watched so many KZbin videos - but it was impossible. Eventually it just happened naturally, but nothing I did made a difference. Honestly I really hope nothing like that ever happens again as it's pretty scary how she consumed my life and how little control I had. I also don't know if I learned anything that would make another time any different - as I said I eventually (pretty out of nowhere) became pretty apathetic towards her, but I've no idea how and it didn't seem to be to do with anything I did, as hard as I tried to get over her. Oh well, it's been years and nothing similar (all-consuming) has happened since, so fingers crossed.

[@tinakrisnaibot3233]

She isn't a lesbian!

[@oldenoughtobeyourmom221]

Yes

[@sofias4777]

she is pansexual i beleive, so i think a more inclusive thing to say is wlw or queer women but also yes :))

[@mindy5027]

Yep, in middle school I had a friend and we would hold hands and walk to classes together and flirt and be gay but neither of us had totally realized we were queer yet (shes bisexual and I'm a lesbian) but we would even talk about how when we got older we would travel the world together and get married but "just as friends" lol. I'm 19 and she's 18 and we recently reconnected after not speaking all throughout highschool and we both came out to eachother and talked about how we were crushing on eachother in middle school. We both admitted to even checking the other persons Instagram to see how they were/what they were doing every once in a while. I moved out of the state around the time we stopped taking but im visiting her in Nov. Which should be..interesting and good I hope lol. (Theres still a small piece of me that thinks maybe just maybe something will happen but either way I just at least want to be friends)

[@evab1410]

I recently found a poem I wrote when I was about 9 and it went: "This is a sad poem about a woman with no man: Once there was no man, Oh well... so be it" Maybe I was a super young feminist (rejecting the idea that a woman without a man is sad) or I was not able to see myself with a man (because...gay), or both! I didn't journal much as a kid, but I love I still have this

[@KearaGraves]

I LOVE YOUR 9 YEAR OLD SELF OMG whatta queen😂

[@princessthyemis]

I LOVE THIS

[@sonder_safety]

bahahaha this is the funniest thing

[@Iamthelaw.]

How are you gay at 8

[@lazyweirdohehe]

@@Iamthelaw. well ur born with gayness

[@charlenechan8189]

OMG THIS IS ABSOLUTELY ICONIC BABY KEARA WAS AN ICON. THE VOCABULARY THO 😭 SHAKESPEARE COULD NEVER

[@jennsumbera6435]

THIS WHOLE VIDEO WAS EVERYTHING FKJDSHGS. PLS U ARE SUCH A MOOD KEARA, IT WAS SO CUTE AND FUNNY AND I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

[@walker8068]

I remember picking out boys to have a crush on during primary and then getting uncomfortable or grossed out when they liked me back. Turns out I was a baby gay not willing to except I had a crush on my best friend, probably why I hated her boyfriend…. 😅

[@ariiiiiiiiiiiii6583]

omg i 'picked' boy to have crushes on to

[@anystuff241]

Well- same. I'm pan but as I the first time liked a boy that actually liked me back as soon as he started to text with hearts I got so uncomfortable that I told him it was a prank. He was really hurt but after that we kinda became friends. Later on he got a crush on me again but this time I was like no, let's stay friends. (and then I have more tea to that but it's not the point so...)

[@walker8068]

@@anystuff241 I relate to the hearts omg

[@imameme3185]

@@ariiiiiiiiiiiii6583 oh my god, ME TOO! like jeez

[@nella2852]

"literally and figuratively..." had me dead 😭💀

[@AydenGraceMusic]

It’s funny when people think I suddenly became bi, or being gay is a choice, because look at my old journal entries, you’ll see it wasn’t a sudden “decision”. It was a life long discovery

[@maggie5018]

It’s so sweet how you want to slowly share more and more of yourself with us here. I can see from u younger self journals that you’re a really smart, kind and valuable person! So glad to be a part of ur community

[@slaysweetie21]

WHY DID THAT PROM STORY SOUND LIKE IT CAME FROM A WATTPAD STORY LMAO

[@KearaGraves]

FOR REAL THO. I COULD WRITE A FANFIC. WHY DIDN'T I???

[@slaysweetie21]

@@KearaGraves PLSJSJD ITS NEVER TOO LATE TO 😭😭

[@KearaGraves]

@@slaysweetie21 TRUE... 😏

[@CursedChildOfTheFae]

THAT'S WHAT I WAS THINKING!!!

[@eca7726]

it's so nice to feel like a hopeless romantic high school student again, thank you for making this. Pls do this again (only if you want to 😂)

[@tanapsycho1008]

im in highschool rn and i can't get this girl out of my head so im glad im not alone (shes so pretty; crying and throwing up)

[@urgayfriend]

I’m in middle school and I am still a hopeless romantic #rejection

[@tiny.elephant9695]

I am in that phase rn😔

[@Nerdykay]

Hahaha it was super funny and cute! “Juliet and androgynous Juliet” that was hilarious! Thanks for sharing Keara, it made me think about myself and figuring out my sexuality.

[@Travel_and_kittens]

“It's Juliet and androgynous juliet”, why is this describing my life so well? (✨🏳️‍🌈I AM ABSOLUTELY GOING TO USE THIS SENTENCE 🏳️‍🌈✨)

[@mintchocolatechip8673]

lmaooo I love thisss I wish I would've written down my feelings when I started questioning so I could look back on it and cringe a little bit as well hahah

[@lassam333]

So interesting what things you find out/remember going back through memory lane. Do still have contact with "Juliet" ?

[@KearaGraves]

she's still a friend of mine! we catch up once in a while! :)

[@mirrorball_12]

Already know from the title that this video I gonna be one hell of a video, love ya Keara hope you are doing well this must have brought so many nostalgic memories ❤

[@ilistentogirlinred3097]

"but instead of romeo and juliet it's juliet and androgynous juliet." LOL I love this so much.

[@daddyvr6858]

I'm so ready for the para social slumber party vibes

[@conlon4332]

I'm pretty sure "you can't help who you fall in love with" is a saying. Like, maybe a mushy teen romance saying, but still. I don't think you invented it.

[@aragingqueergirl9501]

Otis said it in sex ed season 1 so 🤷‍♀️

[@KearaGraves]

OPE... i didn't think i was that smart anyway hahahaha

[@the_zster_official]

It’s from girl in red

[@sheanentheong]

Hi Keara! Um I'm thinking of starting a gay social club in college but idk what do people do in gay social clubs lol. If I'm not mistaken, you were in one for a while in highschool. Can you tell me some of the things you did? It would be really helpful. Thanks. Love you 💕

[@awkweirdabby8352]

Hello! Currently about to be president of an lgbt club at my college. Some of the stuff we did in previous years: education/lgbt history, celebrate coming out day, educating allies, make bracelets with your pride flag, letting people rant about their struggles, halloween party, lgbt safe prom, crafts, advocating for lgbt rights on campus. Open mic/art show, chalk drawing, trips to lgbt museums or movies/musicals if anything is nearby. Oh also watching movies and short films and stuff with representation together. The most important part is that you’re there as a calm, safe space especially if your college isn’t super liberal. Feel free to email me!

[@sheanentheong]

@@awkweirdabby8352 thank you so much! 💖💖

[@awkweirdabby8352]

Sheanen the Ong np! Good luck!! 💗

[@nicegenderbro8814]

But I think you also have to be careful not to out people who attend before they're ready

[@sheanentheong]

@@nicegenderbro8814 yeah I also thought about that 😭 it's gonna be tough

[@sehersings2543]

Omg what you read from your past sounds like something I’d write in my journal now lol

[@hannahmcadie2470]

i have so many diaries from when i was a kid and i KNOW there’s so many baby gay moments in them

[@melkorokam]

girl you were writing whole fanfics i cant 💀

[@kfc6029]

this is so funny to me because i had a very similar 'not knowing im gay' growing up story haha

[@angelpragyaminz1950]

I've never been this early to Keara's video before!! love you!!

[@jennsumbera6435]

WHEN U SHOWED THE L&F PIC MY HEARTTTT-

[@eddiespaghetti2734]

me too🥺🥺🥺🥺

[@ericag321]

I just did a super similar thing recently going through all my old journals and cringing at all the closeted self talk 🤣

[@helenacorrea6620]

OMG! Everthing you felt I felt too at the same age! WOW! Boys in my classes had crush on me, but I didn't care and looking back today I was very mean to them lol. I was always in the boys group but I don't remember of having a huge crush on a girl at that age like before ten or 11 or 12, but I have today and it's a friend soo I deal with that pain :( Anyway, thank you for sharing your baby gay stories, that was really funny! LOVE YA! Take care!

[@hannahbanana9901]

did we all collectively have our first gay crush on our best friend or am i the only one lol. it only lasted like 2 weeks :(

[@viktorieprazakova5606]

part two please, i could watch this content for hours!

[@kaiya33123]

This video made my day!!

[@ericaschoenberg7782]

this is such a mood lmao!! I have a whole box of old diaries in my closet but there’s no buildup to the gay?? so ive been stalking my own tumblr posts from early 2012 trying to figure out When I Knew lolol

[@shadowcat4529]

Omg this whole thing is so relatable as I'm still in school and WOW that was cringe but super funny and cute!

[@itz_ary]

I loved this so much. I still live with my parents (cause i'm in highschool and can't afford an apartment yet) so journalling just isn't in the cards for me. Like a couple of years ago I was maybe 10, 11. I kept a diary and I wrote about my crush in it both boy and girl but i didn't know i was queer yet so i described girl as my "very close best friend" but i legit described the boy as my crush and my parents got suspicious of me writing in it all the time, snooped through my room, found it and read it. Next thing I know i'm called into their room, they yell at me for HAVING A CRUSH in the first place then proceed to tell me I can't have one until i'm old enough to be MARRIED😭. Luckily they didn't pick up on the "very close best friend" bs or I would've been SCREWED. Sucks to have conservative Christian parents sometimes. Like they can insult someone pissing them off on the road by going too slow but I have one crush and Pandora's box is suddenly open. I'm probably NEVER coming out to them.

[@landslave]

You are SO GENUINE. How can we not be on team Keara? I hope you and Lauren love and live an epic life together for 70 yrs. And I hope you both understand you each won the lottery in spouses/wives/husbands.

[@kathleenpallotta]

KAOPDASKDDJHD that was funny. Don't feel too embarassed though, that's probably what EVERY baby-gay diary looks like 😂

[@avaball2345]

This was so funny i can understand how you felt while reading just trying to kind of change your emotions by reading in a different way 😅 love you keara

[@kayladennison7986]

Her: boys haveing crushes on me and me hateing it Me: MY HOLE LIFE RN

[@eca7726]

I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT THISSSSS

[@justinfelt748]

Hi, Keara!😊😊😊😊😊. This is amazing! I have never seen your old diary before in 2010. Also, the picture of you as a baby, it's so beautiful that I can cry happy!😢😢😊😊💙💙💙💙💙💙. And right now, you're all grown up and become the prettiest girl in the world with cool, positive vibes.💙🌈💜🌈💙🌈💜. I give this video a 10+ for your beautiful diary stories!⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐👍. I love you so much, Keara. You're the best!😊😙💙💙💙💙💙🌈💜💜💜💜💜💜😊⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐👍

[@내이름은애승]

I watch every video by x2 but yours I watch it on normal speed bc I just want to enjoy it as fully long as possible its so fun!! Thank u sm for making these videos Keara:) love from South Korea💖❤️💖❤️💖❤️😍😍😍 hope u see this!!!😊

[@ananunez4887]

and you will see you 20 years today and you will feel tenderness

[@em4200]

“because i don’t really care either” ME WHEN I WAS IN MIDDLE SCHOOL

[@tuxedosam5400]

The way you read this made it sound like some really strange Wattpad story, and honestly that’s how I wrote in my journals too 😂

[@BoolilyT]

can't wait to look back on my present writing lmao

[@stephtaylor6292]

Omg Keara! Please! I need more of this! .....was just getting into it the gay angsty teen vibes... my kinda content. :)

[@steph_0085]

LOVE this! Great vlog. She’s That Girl would make a great title for a les romcom movie..

[@nanadecarvalho7840]

This was so sweet Keara 😂 Teenage angst was such an intense feeling.

[@nikipomu]

u wrote the diary like a whole gay romance novel and I love that

[@meikelezer8203]

Teen keara was very angsty hahaha loved this video

[@epicme7032]

Those journals are so fricking relatable, wasn't laughing coz it sounds bad, was laughing coz i felt so understood lmaoo 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@diewertje9810]

Adorable , I was cracking up the whole time

[@idibidi3724]

9:30 >>>> Insert THAT short clip from Tom and Jerry where Jerry is calling Tom over. You know which one I'm talking about. 😶😝

[@debbie7989]

what you said at 6:38 ...... when i tell u it's like im hearing myself 😭 so relatable

[@MargoMB19]

Omg I'm feeling secondhand embarrassment so hard! You are really brave to share all this, I can't imagine sharing my diary entries from that age with anyone (mine were usually a lot less coherent and rather stupid though).

[@caryllannetrasmonte4325]

I literally did not have a boy crazy phase unlike my peers which made me thought maybe romance isn't for me, but then I was just actually gay

[@yesxiloveyouthemost]

I loved this so much, and it's very much relatable ;) you're not alone in this!

[@harleyquiinnnn]

i wish you did more of this 🥺

[@Darkstarproductions1]

Omg this was priceless lol. We have all been there, well, mostly haha. It's very cool how you kept all your diaries that far back, I remember some of mine, but I didn't keep them because my handwriting was terrible. Today I keep a diary, but I do what the iconic Anne Lister (Gentleman Jack) did & I write anything personal in code, so no one else can read my cringy words lol

[@TinaMey]

I have such a baby gay diary as well and whenever I read it I cringe so hard. It’s so funny and so obvious how gay I was. But it took me many pages before I actually questioned myself :’D

[@kamilamendes687]

9:52 "rEaLly SetTiNg tHe ScEnE, what an angsty teen bedroom vibe" "It was not my own bedroom, it was like my friend's bedroom"

[@slaysweetie21]

LMAO PLS THE SECOND HAND EMBARRASSMENT I FELT THROUGH THE SCREEN OF LIL KEARA 😭😭

[@user-sc7rp8ks7s]

Senior Keara had their wattpad moment

[@dahli8043]

"its juliet and androgynous juliet" I LITERALLY LOST IT I HAVE A HEADACHE FROM LAUGHING SO HARD

[@ko-lq7vu]

“you can’t help who you fall in love with” sounds kind like “the heart wants what it wants” so maybe that was the saying?

[@aggressivecatnamedtiny2462]

1:06 awwwwww alil deja vu 🥺 who else came form that show🥺

[@_thismess]

9:00 bruh this sounding like a whole fanfic

[@cinnamonroll9375]

i just realised this is quite long so um sit tight haha sorry for rambling i remember this one time in like year 6, my friends were getting on my nerves asking me if i had a boyfriend all the time. i didn’t really know i liked girls, just that i was a bit “odd” as i remember writing once. (i didn’t like boys as my friends did, i think i meant) anyway, one day i just decided i liked this boy in my class who i’ll call sam. all my friends were obsessed with the fact i “liked someone”, so they asked him out for me without my permission (shocker!!). i think after that i dated him for a while. we went to the cinema once, and saw each other at someone’s birthday party. i think i got quite weirded out that i was dating him and felt mean seeing as i didn’t like him. so, one day, i asked him if we could just be friends, and he blew his top. he told everyone i was gay (i think everyone was already a bit suspicious of this since i wasn’t really like them in that way.) thinking back to this all, it was very silly and i wish i could have just not pretended to like someone 😅

[@stephensullivan4696]

God this video made my heart burst I'm shaking right now

[@KrissyFizzle]

Your handwriting was so pretty 😩❤

[@bil_gor1223]

Idk why but this video reminds me of when me and my friends found a breakup poem in the school bathroom that was obviously written by someone who was like 8 or 9. It was like, “Roses are red Vilets are ble And your soul is black For brecking up with me” It was really sad and funny at the same time!

[@eddiespaghetti2734]

hiii lgbtq+ community🥰🥰

[@mintchocolatechip8673]

hey ;)

[@eddiespaghetti2734]

@@mintchocolatechip8673 hello!!!!

[@someone25915]

heyy :))

[@_-maxine-_9460]

I just found your channel, I really like your videos!!

[@sydneymarie7255]

why did we all resort to writing poetry 😭😭😭

[@corinneadair2119]

Omg that isn’t cringe that’s so FREAKING CUTE OMG I’m 16 and whenever I try to Journal I get embarrassed and worried that someone will find it so I rip up the paper and throw it away lmao

[@valentinaosoriogonzalez3692]

OMG, this just made my whole day 😩

[@earlybirddreamful]

YOUR PALM (not hand lol idk the english word), i had to try doing that again, instantly (failed cause i don't have any hairstyleskills that pass braiding sth as in literally sth lmao, and my tophair was too long for the exact look) also i find it really nice that u censored stuff cause it shows other people they don't owe anyone exposing things that feel private!

[@linloo111]

Do you mean their ponytail? (Yes, that's a real word. Language can be funny sometimes. 😆)

[@ionataberham5983]

so cute! I wish I journalled more!

[@raine5384]

LITERALLY AND FIGURATIVELY IM DYING

[@AD-hs9su]

😂🤣🤣🤣wow it just brighten up my day!! 😂 part 2 plsss

[@Sophia-qq2ys]

Sounds like a whattpad story

[@hannahmaggieberdine2397]

My old diaries are just denial central lol

[@theyeetmaster9688]

Am I the only one who had Little Miss Perfect playing on repeat in their mind during Baby Queera's after-prom party story?

[@theoneandonly1810]

This reminded me of myself in the 5th grade. I picked boys who were taller than me (because I was pretty tall and I didn't want a boyfriend being shorter that me. I know very cliche) and seemed pretty ( and sometimes they weren't even pretty). I wanted to convince myself I had a crush on one of them ( I don't even don't know why I did it) but I always wanted to be friends with this one girl (probably had a crush on her?🤷🏻‍♀️) In grade 3 and 6 I had almost the same problem (wanted to become friends with some girls). Now it turns out I'm bi 😂

[@clemensfarver3028]

I would love you as though I was a girl. Girls have taught me so much. I 💘 love how girls love and need loved.

[@loupelizzo2399]

I love and enjoyed your diary and love this gay readings and thank you so much for sharing your diary. Just a great video

[@speabi7203]

7:53 keara… this sounds like my old FanFiction.

[@kenziestoneman7141]

Sister I just have to let you know you are a Beautiful Queen👑, I hope you know it now and remember it your whole life you are Beautiful and we all Love you just as You are!!!!!

[@blandinelong33]

Oh, oh I need this so much.

[@soleneptune9498]

That second hand embarrassment almost killed me great video😂😂😂🤦🏾‍♀️

[@ajabtambuwala6172]

why do we have the same journal entries ??????!!!!

[@lizzylui5089]

This should be a Wattpad story

[@meyathehuman9780]

2010 you in that first entry really said "material gworl🤪"

[@luvvstayayay2623]

PLS DO PART TWO 😃

[@tan_tanii]

I USED TO KEEP A DAIRY, AND ONE IF THE THINGS I WROTE WAS LITERALLY HOW JEALOUS I WAS OF THIS BOY WITH MY BEST FRIEND, AND I KEPT SAYING LIKE "omg, this boy is keeping me away from my bestie" AND THINGS LIKE THAT. OH, LITTLE 11 YEAR OLD ME, YOU DONT KNOW IT YET, BUT YOU ARE FRUITY

[@adelalidarikova2962]

I died at the brackets

[@airavatara]

I feel like I'm gonna have a heart attack bc 3 minutes into this video I realized that I have a journal from grade 5 where I unknowingly admitted to having a crush on a girl. And my mom encouraged us to journal so she could read them. Obviously I have trust issues and now I'm afraid my h*mophobic mom read that AAAHHHHH

[@rachellerios3739]

Your Diary is literally my life right now lmao 🤣 I'm a awkward baby gay hahaha

[@ellouisebadger849]

Really cute video idea 🥰

[@thatmarvelshifter]

GAY-BIES UNITE~

[@kennedysamuel6647]

God this vid is my fav of all time now😂😂