Shadow Work: How To Stop Projecting Your Shadow & Break Your Trauma Bonds I New Course, Watch Now

[@jordanthornton]

I know that not everybody can afford an online course, but I hope that the fifteen videos in the Shadow Work Playlist will support the next steps of your shadow integration journey. I created this free playlist to function like a crash-course on shadow psychology with the intention of being as accessible and actionable as possible. I didn't want to stash the basics behind a paywall or email signup - I would rather you keep learning right here on KZbin. You can instantly access over five hours of beginner-to-advanced shadow work exercises and lectures with the free playlist linked in the description. Make sure to take your time with the guided exercises, and don't forget to buy the golden books. Jordan P. S. I want to say a heartfelt thank you to this comments section community. My channel is niche, and you've seen the Inner Work Library slowly expand over the last two years. I feel fortunate to receive such deep and genuine connections online, and KZbin recently told me that there have been more than 4000 unique commentors across my entire channel. Thank you for showing up, I appreciate you. If you want more depth, we can meet inside the library: courses.jordanthornton.com/shadow-work-library/

[@IrisWORKS555]

Thank you for your service sire 😭🩷

[@SunraeSkatimunggr]

It has taken me up until maybe three years ago for me to forgive both my parents for what they did and didn't do. I am now 67 years old and that healing came in progressive stages, starting with therapy, then shamanic study, which does heavy shadow work, then years of making my own mistakes with my own kid, then finally seeing that my parents did the best they could for as messed up as they were, to actually seeing some of the more loving things they did do, which I was too blinded to see. I actually feel real love for them now.

[@jordanthornton]

Thanks for sharing some of your story here, it’s a great reminder of how these things really do take time… but are absolutely possible. I appreciate you taking the time to write this 🌲

[@silverly0]

This was very sweet to read! Amazing work and journey you have been on.

[@mindfulpaths101]

"what are the shadow benefits of not moving on and not healing this hate bond" 🔥🔥🔥powerful question

[@jordanthornton]

Hard hitter, but it's one of those questions I find myself asking on a monthly basis with various personal shadows. It's a great principle, glad it helped.

[@mindfulpaths101]

@@jordanthornton another one: what shadow disbenefits would occur if I was to let go and be empowered. I.e. Id have no excuse to not be authentic and being authentic and being seen would mean I’d be vulnerable to rejection which I believe I wouldn’t be able to handle 👀… But now I know this… what next? Because I feel like me knowing this is fantastic but it still dominates. How can I convince myself that I could handle rejection? I know logically rejection is just incompatibility and whilst painful it’s not reflection of my worth… yet I can’t shake its hold on me!

[@saloshniejagathesan1577]

Fear of being re traumatized?...

[@nicoleconnor_]

The level of honesty that gets unearthed here is very powerful. Detatching from pain is like shedding a diagnosis; it fundamentally alters your identity. I remember learning how to get radically honest with my Self about what needs were getting met so long as I remained in pain. Once I knew I could heal, I then had to decided if I wanted to, and face all of the ways I was choosing to self-harm if I didn't.

[@jordanthornton]

That radical self honesty is deeply confronting, in the best ways possible. It’s clear you’ve done this work too, Nicole.

[@semanil1285]

I’ve been to therapy for I believe 6-7 months now and while answering the questions I felt like “been there done that” but I am here because something is missing. I think I am at the stage of faking forgiveness or sometimes feeling like I did forgive these people and then something happens and it feels like I didn’t. I will ponder over the last question because I think I never asked myself that question directly.

[@LOVE_ALL_AROUND]

I came across your channel a few months ago. Last few years I have been doing shadow work and didn't know it until this last year. So, I am working on this integration in myself in loving more AND hating more. Hating the people who molested me. Hating my late mother for neglecting me and my siblings. Hating the victimization of people and our planet. I feel split. Thankfully I found this content on KZbin and started sound therapy recently. THANK YOU!

[@jordanthornton]

I'm glad to have provided something for you as part of this journey, and likewise hope you're getting the most out of the playlist and series here. Thanks for taking the time to comment and introduce yourself.

[@yootoob1001001]

This exercise is fantastic and I'm glad you've made it understandable and available to anyone who wants to work on themselves. Thank you, Jordan.

[@jordanthornton]

Thanks for being here and taking part, I hope you continue to enjoy the playlist! More exercises in there for your shadow integration - good luck!

[@ArthursAtman]

I can move on, but have no real ability to forgive in a deep sense. Worse, I can't forgive myself for letting people take advantage of me...all I can do is get stronger, erect better boundaries, and simply stop betraying myself or weakening myself. That's as far as I've gone on this journey man. Miles to go

[@ArthursAtman]

I'm not even healthy enough to require vengeance. I've got to testify next month against someone who assaulted me, nearly ended me, and I'm actually testifying in his divorce/custody hearing, just to protect the wife and child--not even for me (it is a loathsome burden I don't need, to be honest...rather just having nothing more to do with him). I honestly don't even want to hurt this man; simply protect innocents...and yet, I feel this intense shame, b/c I probably do have a social duty to put him behind bars...but he was my friend, still love the guy...don't actually have ill-will, oddly enough

[@ENSO-wildsound]

I find these videos pair well with Heidi Priebe's shadow work vids. She has a bit of info around shame though, as she studied that in her master's. Or you can check out "healing the shame that binds you" by John Bradshaw. Shame is a huge heavy weight that stops or restricts healing 🪶 I wish you all the best in your healing ❤

[@33candycandy]

Your content is top quality , thanks you for your hard work🙏🏼

[@Surrender..]

1. Who have you not forgiven? 2. How did they fxck you up? 3. How does the memory of this relationship/part of your story is still hurting you? 4. Are you willing to heal this hate bond / Are you willing to forgive them/ to move on? Yes or No (Somatic Experience needed) , either is okay 5. What are the Shadow Benefits of not moving on/not letting go / not healing this hate bond? (Usually Victimization)

[@waakkeuppp]

4:27 so important - I’ve waited years to hear that - thank you Jordan

[@Rhiannon_Rose]

Thank you, Jordan ❤ This is a powerful process walk. Appreciate you.

[@jordanthornton]

It’s a heavy video - was heavy for me to teach and review, so I appreciate you taking the time to sit with me, Rhiannon. 🌲

[@yinglan9606]

I appreciate how raw this exercise is. I will keep these questions, especially the last one, at hand to check myself

[@jordanthornton]

Hard hitters, but absolutely worthwhile. Thanks for taking part 🌲

[@daridari755]

Thank you for sharing this Jordan. I appreciate the authenticity you advocate. Its not often seen in day to day life

[@jordanthornton]

Cheers, really aiming for true depth with this course, and I've been hearing excellent things from the students on the inside. Consider checking it out if you want a structured educational experience - wishing you well!

[@gitu_tg]

Thank you, Jordan 🎉 2 days in a row!!!

[@jordanthornton]

Can’t contain my excitement to finally share what I’ve been working on this year 🙌🏻

[@IrisWORKS555]

Omg I was triggered like crazy when I heard you say « hate bonds » my whole body was not happy during the video but I am eager to heal . I remember when I stumble on your Channel maybe 2/3 years ago. The first video I saw was about the book Born To serve. After that I binged a lot of your analysis and I stopped but I came back since 2/3 months. You are a true inspiration your work is deeply appreciated and I am looking forward to buy the courses one day 💕

[@jordanthornton]

Yes, I just saw your other comment and left a longer response over there. I appreciate your long-term commitment to this work, and especially your willingness to sit with that discomfort in this video. Thank you.

[@JennyBesserit]

I laughed out loud at the hate bond joke 😂😂😂

[@gailaltschwager7377]

Thank you so much, Jordan!

[@jordanthornton]

Of course, this is a hard hitter. Hope you find value here.

[@gailaltschwager7377]

@@jordanthornton I'd love to say that I've forgiven everyone I've perceived to have done me harm, but the best I can say is that I see their pain. I still don't want to be around them.

[@kadeemallory320]

Thank you for that video 🙏♥️ This may sound weird but my biggest leap in healing shadow work was when I quit coffee. Coffee keeps us in a state of fight or flight and it is a huge barrier for healing to take place. Some people may get triggered by that suggestion… pay attention to those triggers… they are indicators🙏♥️

[@jordanthornton]

Yes, for some people it can really get in the way! I'm glad you found the right path for yourself - and can imagine the impact. I likewise needed to give up drink and drugs to get anyway with my personal shadow work - going on five years sober, but yet to give up coffee like yourself!

[@kadeemallory320]

@@jordanthornton Huge congratulations on giving those up 🙏♥️ I have realized it’s not about demonizing things but realizing what is holding us back and why we have chosen those things to hold us back. Let me know if you quit coffee and what you experience after letting that go 😊

[@ENSO-wildsound]

Nervous System Regulation is it's own thing imo, I can't drink coffee and never have due to heightened hypervigilance. My previous partner needed coffee to exist in the morning. What works for one doesn't work for another - but emotional buffering is great for resisting emotion. A lot of people use drugs and alcohol. Sugar. I'm sensitive enough to cut out refined sugar. But I'm not going to tell others they have to quit sugar. I just do what's best for me and share why - like sobriety is better for integration. If you consider coffee to be bad for you in that way then that's fine, for you.

[@airdrumchick]

Exellent video 🙏🏼💯

[@jordanthornton]

Thanks for being here!

[@Victor_Vincent_Vurpillat]

Amazing content in this video Jordan. Not sure if this will help anyone, but one of the techniques that allowed me to move forward was: Forgiving the "WHY" they did it, but not "WHAT" they did. It is a small distinction, but I found it helpful for me.🌲

[@jordanthornton]

Really nice perspective shift for those who need to hear it - cheers! 🌲

[@JennyBesserit]

This is an excellent video

[@jordanthornton]

Thank you, different level of quality and energy inside the course.

[@Saoussennelina]

I tried to forgive my mother, she was emotionally unavilable at times and highly critical, her way of treating me hurt me alot especially because I'm a highly sensitive person... Now that I'm a mother I understand that her being that way wasn't really about me, it was about her own trauma and the feelings she had... I'm now starting to experience the accepting phase and it's emotionally more agreable, I like the peace that comes with it...

[@jordanthornton]

Thank you so much for sharing some of your story. It takes a lot of strength and self-reflection to forgive and understand our parents. Your comment is a reminder that healing and growth are possible.

[@hisham8365]

Jordan I can’t find the playlist with the practical techniques for shadow work u had on your channel? Did u private them cause i was using the videos on it to integrate the shadow and learn the techniques u provided us with.

[@jordanthornton]

That’s the old playlist unfortunately, those videos are about two years old and I’ve decided to delete them so I can make space for an even better Shadow Work Playlist. I’m uploading fifteen new shadow work videos over the next month, and you can find the playlist linked in the description here. The old videos had their charm, but we’re upgrading! 🔋

[@MichaelWilliams-bx2ty]

You had to hit us with the hate bond joke.

[@jordanthornton]

Didn't know when I would get another opportunity.

[@MichaelWilliams-bx2ty]

@@jordanthornton shocking. Utterly shocking.

[@shums77]

❤❤❤❤❤

[@Ayodiba]

With all this reading :) perhaps a video on the mindset of reading may be helpful? How to not apply the Victorian mode of focus but to see attention as a moment to moment renewing of interest. To not read fast but at a hypnotic enchanted pace. Edit - out of curiosity, did you ever read a course in miracles?

[@jordanthornton]

Check out episodes 104 & 80 - they both answer your question in detail and give you a glimpse into my personal process! In terms of ACIM, I have but it's never been significant for me personally. I think it came a little too late in my reading into Christian mysticism, I had encountered more personally moving work such as Mysticism by Evelyn Underhill.

[@Ayodiba]

@@jordanthornton will check them out again, the idea of immersing into the essence has stuck. Everylyn Underhill and Alice Bailey, I’m waiting for a moment, their words are clear but felt too powerful at the moment.

[@ArthursAtman]

Hahah, I enjoyed the Bond joke

[@mission1-2-1]

Would it be far fetched to suggest trauma bonds can be held against the self? I'm thinking toxic shame.

[@jordanthornton]

Interesting connecting, I think that could be possible.

[@yaronhamu176]

Where I can find the 36 book list?

[@jordanthornton]

It's my private course, but you can check out this playlist and my latest 24 book video for some general recommendations - good luck.

[@yaronhamu176]

Thank you for your reply 🎉

[@Surrender..]

Don't play this card forever (Story-Frame)

[@sandraumney5516]

Argh. I’m 58. No one is a write off at any age but I know what you mean.

[@rshicks256]

+1

[@jordanthornton]

🌲🌲