How to Convey Emotion in Your Writing | Writing Tips

[@writeitdown2013]

Thanks for posting on this topic, it's so important and challenging. Film and television have the benefit of actual people to convey emotions, but writing stories requires simply the power of the written word, conveyed with subtly

[@ShaelinWrites]

Definitely it's a totally different challenge in fiction vs. film! Studying film and screenwriting can for sure help with writing emotion, I think, by observing how actors subtly express emotion, or how screenwriters use showing to include emotional subtext in a script.

[@N.Traveler]

"Don't just show what the emotion feels like, describe how *the character* feels it" Omg, this was the piece I've been missing! Thanks so much, Shaelin! I'd pay you a million to be my editor. I have the talent of making people cry about my books, except it's my writing they cry about, not the story... When you talked about subtlety, I immediately thought about the 'lamp light scene' in Bohemian Rapsody.

[@ericbell7919]

You're funny

[@Диана-я5э1к]

Just want to give an example of one moment I decided to use a label instead of a description: my character is autistic (I am too) and in his specific case his mind works around all the labels people taught him in order to make the process of assimilation of a complicated emotional concept easier for him. So, instead of being able to directly link the feeling to its name, the feeling remains unexplained bc all he knows is the name, therefore sometimes oversimplifying complex emotion as "sadness", since people never taught him, as a child, to fully comprehend different types and causes of sadness.

[@dukeofdenver]

This came at a very good time for me. I'm writing a group of children dealing with the loss of a father, and I was just doubling down hard on the physical descriptions of grief, and it was getting quite repetitive. I didn't know another way. Thanks.

[@blabbinglobster]

Good luck with your manuscript. It sounds really good.

[@Adbhut]

Working on my book which deals with this as well! all the best!

[@gamewriteeye769]

I have a character who has roughly the same emotion but it gets gradually worse, from scared, to dread, to being irritable, to gaining a burst of confidence, to being reminded of the fear again, and burst of rejecting the fear with confidence to fear/dread again at the reminder. And they fall over and over and freeze when the dread gets too high. This happens over the course of introducing them in the first three chapters, plot events aside. I know now their arc is sped up to devote more time to the main characters, but still, coming back to this video, I can't help but notice that, and I don't know if it's a “bad thing” to have a character have a consistent emotion they fall to that bell curves in severity by the plot moving.

[@riverAmazonNZ]

Helpful, thank you. My main character in my WIP is emotionally repressed, so I’ve had extra work to make sure that comes across and he doesn’t just seem cold-hearted. I made the emotions a bit too subtle in the first draft.

[@Adbhut]

Sounds good, all the best!

[@rosereddened]

One of the most useful pieces of advice I ever got was in a playwriting class I took like a decade ago. It was that you want to keep the emotional intensity of your work varied, and build up to a higher intensity over time, rather than start there, because then you have nowhere to build to. I feel like this is true of writing emotion - that if you're always trying to convey "she felt sad" with "the rain listlessly spattered the windowpane" type sentences or whatever else, no matter how good the individual expressions are, it's going to look like overkill. The example you use of the small moments of grief (or another feeling) being the most impactful works because that small moment isn't what the audience *expects*, which is also true of a dramatic moment. If you always convey feelings in the same way, because you've come to like it or think it's clever, your readers will pick up on your style of writing rather than on the story. Or at least that's how I feel reading books when I notice this sort of thing lol

[@shanthi4855]

For once I'm early!! But thank you so so much for these videos. They really help me as a young writer to improve my writing.

[@ShaelinWrites]

so happy they help!

[@tsentenari4353]

14:45 "sometimes when a character receives terrible news, the most impactful thing is the personal subtle little thing they do" ... More to do with the psychology than with the writing as such: What always gets me is when initially, the character seems to take the news surprisingly well, possibly even makes some flippant remarks about it ---- only to be overcome by an emotional meltdown that seems to come out of nowhere later down the road, as something seemingly totally innocuous is happening. This contrast between the forceful cataclysm building up subconsciously, and the lack of awareness of it of the conscious, reflecting part. Or maybe the futile attempt to best it, keep it from surfacing. (Almost a bit of a trope by now, but gets me every time.)

[@ohdarling6657]

I cant believe that i am almost a hour late just because i was writing lol

[@ShaelinWrites]

I love that for you !!

[@edenmckinley3472]

It's the little, subtle emotional responses that get me the most. In my book, the MC's little sister died the day after his eleventh birthday. The last gift she gave him was a little stone cat figurine. I described her death in the prologue, and at the beginning of chapter one, the first thing the MC does when he wakes up in the morning is to grab the stone cat off his nightstand and rub it. Throughout the book, when he gets put in emotionally wrenching situations, his coping mechanism is to rub the cat. At the end of the book, once his character arc has been completed and he has gotten closure over her death, he meets a little girl who is crying, and he gives the cat to her. Symbols like that can be very impactful, and I hope I'm doing it right. Thanks so much for this video, writing emotion is tricky.

[@mirzunayedali1724]

late reply but i felt sth indesribable when you talked about the cat thing. i think's it's beautiful. Gj buddy. I have a shtick with my char (it's kinda similar) where his trigger finger twitches everytime the guilt of whatever he did before comes to haunt him because all of of his regrets come from pulling the trigger. it's only with he's with certain chars his hands are steady. bit diff, but kinda similar too.

[@edenmckinley3472]

@@mirzunayedali1724 Thank you! I really like what you did with your character. Almost like the guilt is so uncontrollable that it needs a physical expression, and it comes out in a nervous twitch.

[@IsabelA-hp9yt]

You totally had me at specificity. I find it incredibly hard to add enough emotion, but I just loooove the thought of the special emotion-potion-sauce. Thank you so much!

[@cliffashieh3778]

I actually teared up at the handshake example. That was from the top of your head? Freaking brilliant

[@imaginativebibliophile549]

Shaelin, I believe often the subtle emotions are the most beautiful in a story. My stories are character driven and the plot is fueled by their desire, which brings about a journey. Emotion can be weaved into a story through the character’s experiences for the reader to resonate with them. I certainly want to do my character’s stories justice. The part of the story that is easiest for me to write is the ending and it feels emotional for me to have traversed this journey with my characters. I love you

[@evennot]

Yes! Subtle description is the best! Also in case of restrained emotions, subtle mundane clues for what's actually happens in the head of a character can be sprinkled throughout the story, so when the story finally unveils the feeling, it hits better, cause these clues would add more gravitas to it, and the reader might forgive some problems with the story after realizing that there were some hidden things that might seem not logical at first. At least I do so

[@poofreads]

I’ve had that struggle of describing an emotion and then stating it lol and yes I thought I was being clever haha thank you for the advice!!!

[@ssssssloth]

STEALING ROAD SIGNS IS AN AESTHETIC I NEVER KNEW I ADMIRED

[@ShaelinWrites]

honestly same

[@steelegagnon5273]

Writing college essays, and this video actually helped more than my english class in school honestly.

[@AlyssaMatesic]

I LOVE this video! As an editor one of my most common suggestions is to describe body language and other relevant actions/details to convey emotion. Thanks for the awesome tips!

[@zerujah]

Hello from Germany! Thanks a lot, Shaelin, for sharing your knoledge +experience with us! There is almost no topic on your chanel I haven't struggled with and no video that didn't help me. I highly appreciate writers like you who invest in others instead of keeping their knoledge to themselves like a secret.

[@elisa4620]

Or who use their channel as an advertisement for experience online courses. Some only submit surface-level stuff and constantly say to go further you have to subscribe to that or their patreon...

[@Kimthecatlady]

My mom came in and commented on how neat that bookshelf is. Also, she loves the plants, lol.

[@keirstenwahlberg6476]

I'm grateful for this because when I write I sometime unintentionally tell instead of show. Use words like the character was angry, sad or happy. I think I will have to make a conscious effort to rewire my brain.

[@annhugo638]

Great video! This week in my fiction course we chose a favourite short story to analyze. And I chose "I Will Never Tell You This."

[@tsentenari4353]

12:49 loved your description of the two very different perceptions of the field

[@sumayyahkhan8897]

Writers where you at???!!!

[@diogocasstro]

hello

[@izunshirucreepercat3732]

Lol

[@lowercase_ash]

Hi

[@ninanadine1185]

Hi

[@blenditlikebrian568]

Love the moon phases behind you.

[@alytreeps]

This channel, Reedsy, and Film Courage are the best resources for novel writing imo ❤️

[@everynewdayisablessing8509]

Yes! Also "Diane Callahan - Quotidian Writer" channel.

[@alytreeps]

@@everynewdayisablessing8509 absolutely

[@ScullyPop]

Gosh, it's been too long. I forgot how good you break down novel writing.

[@Mana_Ski]

Your example for the hopeless memory is one of my biggest inexplicable childhood fears 😂

[@rustynail7796]

as somebody who writes in third person objective but in a story that's still character-driven, these are so helpful thank you so much lol

[@TheGarethHowell]

Please make a podcast. I would love to listen to your advice all day!

[@Name-zf7qc]

You have NO IDEA how long I’ve been hoping you’d cover this topic! Haha :)

[@michaelcartuccio4851]

She would make a great writing teacher some were in Canada or university in Canada or USA

[@gristlevonraben]

Yeah, I agree. She has a great teaching ability; approachable, informative, flexible point of view, funny, kind, pretty, sassy without being bratty, articulate, and brings energy to her topics. Perfect college professor, and/or writing guru. She has an elegant strength, which always brings to my mind a classical vibe.

[@michaelcartuccio4851]

I agree but funny? Okay? I don't look at cute miss Bishop and say wow she is the next Eddie Murphy?

[@gristlevonraben]

@@michaelcartuccio4851 you are either lacking in a sense of humor, or haven't seen many of her past videos.

[@tia2108]

@@gristlevonraben what does being pretty have to do w teaching ability lol

[@gristlevonraben]

@@tia2108 in our somewhat superficial society, which I do not endorse, appearances aide success, do they not?

[@MxZui]

Ahhh just what I've been needing!

[@phangkuanhoong7967]

i've actually been waiting for your take on this topic for a long time XD Thank you!

[@daedricdragon5976]

I like how around 8:10 you pretty much debunked free will lol! Thanks for the video! I found it quite useful :) And as always, specificity is 42.

[@andydrawsthings6409]

This is exactly the video I needed rn! YOU'RE AMAZING!!!!

[@RiaxaraCo]

Hey so I just wanted to say that I love your content!! (It makes great background noise while I’m writing and it keeps me focused, plus your advice is great.)

[@didyoujust7810]

Really needed this video! I struggle with emotions the most in my writing, for someone who has so many mood swings. 😅

[@jadegeorge9998]

I was asking myself this question the other day. It's like you're reading my mind. 💖

[@leech1355]

When you reached behind you I thought you were going to pull a book out and start dragging it But you were just thirsty and needed your drink 😂

[@kimberlypompey1243]

You said a feel and I went 'neverending no matter how close you think you get to escape

[@JRTProds28]

My favorite example EVER...in All in the Family sequel Archie Bunker's Place, when Edith passed away. After the funeral, etc., her husband, Archie, sees her slippers in the corner of the bedroom. Soooo powerful.

[@ShaelinWrites]

Wow that is a great example! Those kinds of details are so powerful!

[@JRTProds28]

@@ShaelinWrites I "borrowed" it in my WIP.

[@nessie968]

Damn I'm getting teary eyed just thinking about it. I never read this lmao

[@the7thseven873]

And so We Learn✨🐥

[@kimwicks5540]

This is such an interesting topic , thanks for covering it! Also pls u look so pretty

[@jerimyabejaran3575]

gay

[@kimwicks5540]

@@jerimyabejaran3575 indeed

[@olivierballou392]

I was just struggling with this. Perfect.

[@reenasingh6275]

You are very well-spoken and articulate. Perhaps write out a structure for your youtube scripts to stay concise and succint, to avoid seeming convoluted. Other than that, greatness!! Keep it up Shaelin. Subscribed!

[@AdamFishkin]

I've never stolen a road sign either. I did jump off a bridge once into ice-cold water screaming "To hell with you people!!", and swam about 200 meters or so while ranting like a loonadoo until my body stopped working. So I quite understand what you mean by impulsiveness.

[@ashirahelat4749]

You blew me away You are so authentic

[@elliejeanroyden]

Thus was an incredibly rich and valuable video thankyou so much!

[@nabilamiah3814]

Been waiting for the day Queen Shaelin made another writing advice video.

[@Michelle0320-k7e]

Loved this! Can you maybe do one where you give some examples of showing not telling like specific word choices? I'm writing a scene where the main character is feeling anxious and scared but has to keep a show of composure and I know that you must show not tell, but I'm running out of ways to show

[@elisa4620]

Is it written from the character's POV?

[@Michelle0320-k7e]

@@elisa4620 It's in close third person!

[@hafsamumtaz8451]

Aww thank you so much, Shaelin! Your videos are always so helpful! I love how succinct and specific your words are. These tips are great! Love you, bruh. 💖

[@dixie7927]

Totally agree emotion plays very important role in writing, I cannot even sit down in front of paper without right emotion, I find music helps, not sure if anyone else is using it

[@Crivin48]

This channel would not be an amazing channel WITHOUT specificity.

[@bartimusprime5652]

This has really helped me out so much. Thank you! Subscribed 🎉

[@sethrakes1991]

Look at how your top 3 favorite authors convey emotions and imitate some of their sentences with your own characters/verbs/nouns. Also, I recommend buying The Emotion Thesaurus.

[@0915SJ]

You really inspire me to write! Can't thank you enough for these videos 💕

[@melodid5023]

Okay.. so I have a novel with 3 povs and a narrator as an own charakter that has thoughts and feelings XD now it's super complicated to colour the setting and scene with the emotions of the narrator while also considering the emotions of the pov charakters XD just saying that I picked an EXTRA easy pov style because I'm stupid! Thanks for the video Shaelin. It helped a lot :)

[@waffles5238]

7:19 I have never heard something more relatable

[@Douchebagus]

Wow, this is a really good video. I was skeptical at first but this was enlightening.

[@bobbiebrownn]

Your really good. Iv decided to write books and your vids are helping

[@timsfitz9]

Very good. Thank you. I already do this, but its nice to hear I'm on the right path.

[@johndent5251]

Thank you for Your videos Shaelin, they're articulated so well.

[@emmazhang2418]

“ive never been so angry ive stolen a road sign” -shae

[@Jman2543]

Extremely helpful, and clear to the point! And to convey my own emotion, "You're beauty is as peaceful as the coming of dawn, hair as elegant as the flowing ocean tide, eyes filled with all colors mysterious as the sea!" Sorry I just felt that so natural in practicing to show emotion and couldn't help it especially being taught by someone as beautiful as you :)

[@izzy6696]

All of your videos are so helpful, thank you !! :-)

[@johnparnham5945]

Thank you for this video. I really struggle with conveying emotion without blatant telling. The advice you give is really helpful.

[@bpserpents]

Your videos are super helpful~

[@billyalarie929]

i think one of my major problems wrt showing is..... for instance, "tightened in my chest" is not a phrase i would've immediately picked up on as the emotion of "sadness". for instance, my chest tightens, mostly, when i feel my anxiety rising (mainly due to.... having an anxiety disorder. typically there's no real motivating factor to it, for me) i wonder, though, if i'm thinking too on-the-nose, where i'm thinking of emotional descriptors as things that can be assigned to only ONE umbrella emotion (like sadness). because like i said, the tightness in my chest is not something i personally experience with sadness. then again, is that actually true? am i just not in tune with what's going on with my body when i feel this or that emotion? what a complex thing this is.

[@ShaelinWrites]

I think it's important to consider that that example was lacking context. Many physical responses to emotions 1. could apply to multiple emotions or 2. are completely different depending on the person. But, we'd probably know that it was sadness in the piece because the situation the character is in would be one that would evoke sadness. That's why the specific context of the emotion and the character is so important to consider! That sentence was just a quick example to illustrate a point about how to avoid labelling.

[@billyalarie929]

​@@ShaelinWrites oh yeah, it was definitely a great point to bring up to help me to remember to avoid labeling. but you also bring up a great point about context. it DOES matter, and i can write this or that physical response, and i suppose that as long as the context seems to fit well enough, then.... it works well enough. so, you really validated a LOT for me by saying that. i don't have to be thinking of it so much in terms of assigning a 1:1, because emotions and their reactions are rarely a 1:1 relationship. so, as ever, thank you. i feel like you just alleviated a LARGE number of years of creative anxiety that i've been going through. :)

[@ShaelinWrites]

Definitely don't worry about whether a certain response to an emotion is 'wrong' because everyone experiences and reacts to different emotions differently! That's why it's all about exploring what emotions mean to your specific character, since it's different to everyone, and exploring the character's unique emotional response is what makes it interesting. There is no general right or wrong, just what makes sense for the character!

[@billyalarie929]

@@ShaelinWrites seriously, thank you so much for this. i feel like i can breathe again. i'm actually getting emotional myself, ha ha ha this is not awkward at all ha ha ha

[@chrisbonnett6783]

The emotion resides within the reader, not the character. You show the situation and the reader places themselves in the story and they feel the stress, anger, sadness, empathy, etc. I don't know why this is so hard to understand. "Joe slammed the door on his way out."

[@mariorita]

You sure did spoke my mind

[@aidenignition]

Around 7:00 where you were talking about how the character would react to this emotion. I think a simple way of saying what you said is to think of how to externalize the emotion. For me, I have learned to keep my own emotions to myself most of the time, and I find myself forcing my characters to do the same. However, I think if you have a scene where emotion builds, it HAS to lead to something external happening. Otherwise it becomes kind of a dead end. Imagine we're watching a movie, and seeing a character reacting internally to their emotions and then the scene ends and the plot just keeps going and there's no pay off. That is sort of the problem I was running into with my first novel. I think it would be really cool to use this as a plot device, but done unintentionally, it doesn't work.

[@billharm6006]

Seems to me that emotions arise when event and expectation collide. Thus, knowing a character's expectations should help to define the nature and extent of their emotional response to an event. Consequently, when a character has an emotional response, it implies one or more related expectations and their importance to the character. In future, the implied expectation(s) should be honored unless/until the character arc accomplishes a change of expectation. Constructive feedback?

[@KJ-zr2ko]

Thank you. That was helpful.

[@diogocasstro]

almost all of my OC's have a chaos energy and the Main one has Anxiety yey...

[@kennasweet3797]

I get anxiety just reading this but SAME why do I do this to myself lmaoooo

[@diogocasstro]

@@kennasweet3797 I have no idea but... I agree with you lol

[@danieljaygrossett-author]

great vid, loads of great advice, thanks

[@JoannaMurray]

In ‘The Radetzky March’ by Joseph Roth there’s a scene where the characters are preparing for a picnic in the sunshine and then the First World War starts and suddenly there’s a thunderstorm.

[@cloudthief8918]

Pathetic fallacy gets really melodramatic sometimes

[@blueskullzgaming1658]

Its interesting on how you describe emotion

[@jeffj4440]

excellent advice. thx.

[@miiixxx]

Every time you post a video, I leave your channel smarter! So thank you so much Shaelin!!

[@t.k.mcneil1186]

There are also descriptors associated with emotion without naming it. Examples would be something like “vibrated with sweet elation” or “radiated a vengeful ire.” They each imply happiness and anger without actually naming either.

[@satyestru]

I just posted on r/writing about this, and now I might as well go delete it! Thanks, Shaelin!

[@johnchukwuzitere9539]

I wish I could get a list of things that can be shown and things that can be told.

[@ShaelinWrites]

Unfortunately it would be impossible to make one! There are no things that must always be shown or must always be told. It's just about using your discretion based on what you want to accomplish in your piece!

[@shubhrantkhare9439]

Oh great 🤟

[@jamiecolwell8489]

Hey Shaelin!! Do you have any tips for people that want to start an authortube channel? I’m thinking of starting a blog and KZbin channel for my writing and to share tips and create a community! Any tips for that? Thanksss

[@pauline_f328]

10:30 I think this might just have unstuck me, my greatest thanks

[@BlackHermit]

3:06 can anybody please tell me what juice this is?

[@nessie968]

Pumpkin juice

[@BlackHermit]

@@nessie968 Finally someone answered! Thank you so much, nessie!

[@nessie968]

@@BlackHermit no problem lmao I'm not even certain, just a guess xd

[@saynotoextremism7026]

I love you Shaelin 😘

[@thevintageplaylist7191]

This is sooo good

[@elchiponr1]

I love you. great videos

[@Dora23Jan]

Is it okay to describe every emotion rather than, telling, what I mean here is, is it okay to show and describe how they felt every time?

[@ShaelinWrites]

There's no rule for how often you should tell vs. show, so you have to just use your own discretion. Showing is more visceral and engaging to read, telling is more efficient and direct.

[@davidsayersrn]

I think you inspired me to write fiction

[@zetjet9901]

7:40

[@elizabethbrown8833]

Writing is an emotional issue for me. And thsts before I even start.

[@ninanadine1185]

I wish you were my English teacher :(

[@r33mickey]

emOtion pOtion

[@uncleanunicorn4571]

My problem is how to convey emotion in non humanoid robot a.i.'s with their own feelings.

[@lowercase_ash]

I'm not as knowledgeable as Shay but I would describe like, say, fear as a thrill of energy, tiny engines firing up and getting ready to propel them away from the bad thing, fluid shooting through their veins to their joints, their entire body preparing to run, to flee, to get *away*. Or smthn idk

[@ijuka]

I don't really agree with this, fundamentally. Some emotions might cause a person to act, but oftentimes, it doesn't change the way they behave at all. Most adults are pretty good at hiding emotions. Personally, I'd feel like you're teetering towards melodrama if you constantly make your characters react to emotions in an obvious way, as it doesn't feel real at all. I also feel like you're going about it the wrong way, since all your examples had unrealistically simple emotions. People don't actually feel anything as simple as "anger", that is an abstraction. People also tend to feel numerous emotions all at the same time, which these sorts of techniques cannot properly convey. I'd say that none of this video hit on the correct way.

[@legal040]

damn, the parrot thing made me sad and i didn't even read the book

[@Animatty]

Me: *Is mad* LeTs Go StEaL a SiGn

[@ShaelinWrites]

sometimes it happens!

[@Animatty]

@@ShaelinWrites O my goodness I really didn't expect you to respond to that! XD Just wanna say that your videos are awesome and SUPER HELPFUL when I need help with my writing! Thank you for doing this vid especially. Helped a ton.

[@flatdude4667]

@@ShaelinWrites Yes it does happen. Actually (true story) in my younger days, a friend and I stole a 5 foot plastic policeman from a pier one evening. It was cemented to the pavement-took a lot of effort, but we pulled that sucker up and threw it into the boot of my car. We then left it standing outside of a police station. It was a stupid and pointless act, but had the desired effect of releasing my anger at the time. FYI no plastic police men, and or road signs have been harmed since. :-) Thanks for your videos Shaelin, much respect for what you do.