Should Girls Make the First Move? | Christian Dating Advice

[@shaylifeflower]

i texted him first, and i always text him first so i guess i have already came off “desperate” but it’s kinda hard to keep waiting and waiting when you have waited for so many years , and don’t even have anyone to talk to

[@Meloooody1357]

Very trueeeee 😢 it can be frustrating

[@erheetrherh2659]

Hey props for you taking the initiative.

[@sAbr1na2000]

@@shaylifeflower you are actually so brave not desperate! I wish I could send him a text, but for now I'll just wait and see what will the future bring ! :)

[@heythere6983]

It doesn’t come off desperate. If someone interprets that behavior as desperate then they are immature. No one should feel weird for simply talking to someone. It’s all the pre emotive self inflicted insecurities that sabatoge our interactions. You should let your communication be the filter. If they don’t like it, they would probably be an immature communicator

[@3unhy3]

Wow! You guys are literally my age, but so wise and mature. I’ve watched almost all of your videos before deciding to subscribe as there is truth and wisdom in your lessons and life experiences. Such godly man and woman! Praise ❤

[@crys7884]

I just came across your guys’ channel and now I’m binging all your videos!! Y’all are so wise and getting this type of advice from a Christian perspective is so key, thanks guys!!👏🏼

[@samandsadie]

Welcome to the channel and to the family!! We’re so glad The Lord is using our videos! All glory to Him! Thanks for watching 😃

[@eaglea657]

YEEESSSSS!!!! Give tips on initiating! As a Mom they need to hear advice from Godly ppl not just Mom and Dad😂

[@lucycoons]

I love this you guys 💗 so grateful the Lord is leading you to make this type of content! Loving it! Bless you both 🙏🙏✝️

[@kasiakurowska9243]

I love you guys! You`re such a refreshing shower for my desperate mind and soul. As an almost 27 year old, pretty decently looking and quite a modest woman (taking care of all that washing stuff xd) almost a dentist, have never been pursued by any man... so can`t wait to see your next video!! This video as always so valuable :)

[@hermanmelville3368]

Nie łam się. Przyjdzie kryska na matyska ;)

[@kosmicznystworek]

😊😊

[@michaeldyoung5788]

Thanks for sharing. You are not alone. May the Lord brings a wonderful husband to you :)

[@danilaroche1156]

Give the desperate stance to God. Lay it down. Men can sense this a mile away. Recognize that the dating/courtship dynamic has been cruelly altered and perverted by Satan. Pray for the men. This is spiritual warfare .

[@khristineestoso5684]

OMG THIS IS JUST WHAT I NEED RIGHT NOW

[@michaeldyoung5788]

I like you guys’ videos. Thank you a lot! I do wanna say what Sadie did (following his IG first) makes a huge difference. She sent signals that she is at least not opposed to him (and using you guys words, making herself available), so he can easily initiate the conversation. I wish more girls would do this. When she takes a step forward, she finds happiness. When she takes a step backward like lots of women do nowadays, that only causes loneliness, for both her and the guys. What should guys do when girls he is interested in don’t make them available, or show no signals?

[@vivaeuropa]

If they don't invite, don't do anything unless you feel God call you to. In the book of Ruth, we see Boaz is kind, then Ruth is kind in return and is inviting. Then we see Boaz pursue her. Before a woman invites, a man doesn't pursue. It's like crashing a party you weren't invited to maybe you get in but if you were invited you know without a doubt you're in. A woman who also fears too much of a man's rejection of her invite so isn't inviting is a red flag; she needs to find her worth in Jesus more before possibly dating someone.

[@danilaroche1156]

Unfortunately, most women are fearful to show interest or be inviting. Satan has made both sexes wary, suspicious and a bit standoffish. Just be friendly and natural. Not too contrived. Think of her as your sister in Christ, not a conquest. Be warm.

[@itsbeeva]

I agree with being friendly etc. but that can also be confusing ‘cause it could just be their personality and they’re like that with everyone😣 I think showing a lot of interest and asking questions that could be relevant in figuring out marriage compatibility could make that romantic interest rather clear.

[@frankrault3190]

It's such a relief hearing this, thanks a lot for sharing!!!

[@marketa4074]

I just really love how you articulate and your voice, Sadie, you are a fascinating woman 😊

[@jennifergonzalez9129]

Such a blessing to hear all of this, thanks!

[@eaglea657]

So glad to read the ladder comment about yoga we see so many deliverances with people with yoga so glad you're not into it thank you Jesus

[@evansheyliger]

Great video. One thing to note, a man might not pursue because he’s simply not interested, not because of fear.

[@emmabotaz8973]

So good! Also, Sadie started the episode like Sam, you guys so cute.😂😊

[@m_jay5]

As a single guy with high functioning autism (Asperger's Syndrome) I would be absolutely taken aback in a very positive way if a woman made the effort and first move to ask me out!

[@JohnnyPendleton]

When a girl makes a move it is around 85-90% that she will get with the guy.

[@ishowslow9217]

If she's a Godly woman I would say that that increases even to a 98%

[@StrawberryJamJam29]

I’m still waiting for this to happen lol. Approached a few guys in the past and nothing happened/got rejected. I’m 28 and have never been approached by a man. I find most men to be very passive. I got catcalled a lot by non-Christian men. Never experienced an assertive, respectful man approaching.

[@danilaroche1156]

That's never worked for me. I am considered pretty. I was a very successful model back in day. Making the first move was always a big mistake. The guy would be flattered, initially. Then he'd treat me like trash.

[@danilaroche1156]

​We need to pray for men. Your right about most of them acting passive. Satan has shifted the dynamics of courtship and marriage. This is spiritual warfare. Be the best daughter of the Most High. Dedicated, righteous, gentle, feminine. I'm certain God will bring you a great man.

[@ThriftyAir]

Wait actually?! 😭

[@mattersofthemind1631]

Thanks for this advice Sadie and Sam. I was so into this church guy from age 12 till recent. I decided to let him go before my upcoming 18 birthday. I believe that he's not the one for me At first I blamed myself. I thought I wasn't a good Christian. I felt like he judged me or took me to be not a good Christian because I am Catholic he's pentecostal. I believe that at the right time God will bring me the right one I couldn't chase them using my feminist mindset

[@harbar3000]

Get rid of your feminist mindset right now.

[@danilaroche1156]

Don't blame yourself. You have time. Focus on Christ and get away from Catholicism. It's an evil system.

[@anusha_joshua]

Crystal clear answers! God bless !

[@jamielogan7133]

Shabbat slalom✌🏿 everyone😃

[@faith8484]

Brother, It was last week, God gave me some courage and I prayerfully texted a pastor's daughter when she all of a sudden reposted my WhatsApp status where I shared God's word. Never met her though, but her simplicity in her dressing and a little bit of what she shares online about God attracted me. What is really demotivating is that she hardly says a word and replys in single words. Now, I feel like not talking to her ever again. Will that be a good attitude?

[@Lenachkakorovka]

I am not an expert, but a lot of people talk about God on social media, but in reality, they live a non christian way of life. And her berely responding to you means that she isn't interested at all! Especially if she's the daughter of a pastor, that means she has a big friend group of male and females where she isn't looking on social media for anyone. But I really recommend you just trust God and seek Him above all else, and He will bring the right one who is praying for a man like you:) God definitely knows your needs.

[@faith8484]

​@@LenachkakorovkaThank you for your encouragement. God bless your heart 🙏🏼

[@ausbren]

Absolutely love this channel! 🇦🇺

[@samandsadie]

So glad to hear that Brendan!! God bless you!

[@sylviamjames]

Love you guys! I see God all over you!! 😊 yes, lord willing I would love to hear more.

[@laurensmith5649]

What a coincidence! I’m reading the book of Ruth right now! Sweet little God wink.💕

[@vshah1010]

The rule is the same whether you are a Christian, or another religion, or an atheist. The rule is that men always have to approach first and certainly speak first to the woman. The woman can give a non verbal sign, but the man has to speak first.

[@chinazagrace4]

What a awesome and informative vid ❤ Much love 😍. Sadie : brush your teeth 😂😂🤣🤣 it really got me

[@theapexpredator157]

I don't think there is an issue with a Woman Approaching/Initiating/Making the First Move on a Man. Religion really has nothing to do with it or at the very least, it shouldn't... So long as the Woman feels it is done in a Wise and Good Conscious way and she respects the man in case he rejects her, then it's totally fine. Also, I don't see what's wrong with making it clear that one is Single. It doesn't have to mean that one is only thinking about their relationship status...

[@truckdriver3737]

Yes my wife did!!😍😍👍👍

[@_xBrokenxDreamsx_]

it doesn't matter who makes the first move you won't remember anyway. women are the ones who determine whether the relationship is going to happen and what its tempo is going to be. you need to get to the talking phase to see if there's a connection so go ahead and strike up a conversation.

[@megandraving]

thank you, this is helpful! 🥰

[@Randy-us1uf]

Do yall have any advice on dating? I met this girl I was talking to for a week in person and the date seemed to be going well but a couple of days after she just started talking to me less and I don’t know if she loss attraction to me or if I did anything wrong. Im really trying but I’ve been unlucky in relationships.

[@LimeintheCoco]

Work on your fitness and bank account. Never chase these modern women.

[@crystala5033]

Maybe try initiating conversations/dates with her again. If she doesn't respond or seems uninterested, you will have clarified that she has moved on.

[@LimeintheCoco]

@crystala5033 Um, no. That is a major sign of weakness and desperation and she will sense that. He should have moved on when she started talking less. She was clearly not interested. Time for him to get his body right and talk to multiple women at once.

[@crystala5033]

@@LimeintheCoco We don't know the full details of the situation. She's talking to him less, but she is still talking to him. Anything could have happened. She could have lost a relative, had to work overtime at work, anything. I don't suggest clarifying explicitly, but asking her out again and seeing if there is a response one last time might be a good idea, if he really likes her.

[@LimeintheCoco]

@@crystala5033 If anything, he could maybe send one last text to this one. It should have never gotten to the point wheres hes asking for advice on the internet about one girl he went on one date with. Us men, need to have an abundance mindset. We should never keep all our eggs in one basket. Hopefully this young man is talking to several different girls. Times are different now. Dating isnt like how it was for our mom and dads.

[@emmaricky8884]

Blessed 🙌 😇

[@belindanunez6337]

I loved this 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

[@LeahMwende-v2t]

I love your videos .

[@lukegarcia5788]

In today’s society where men are called creepy for approaching women. I do think that woman should in fact make the first move!! Why would I approach a woman if she will possibly label me as a stocker?? Another thing that I might add. I personally don’t pick up on woman’s subtle signals!! She literally has to ask me out. Or I simply won’t know that she’s remotely interested in me!!

[@heythere6983]

I definitely don’t like to chase women. If a women is distant I take it as she didn’t have appreciation for whatever I have to offer (after we established communication and she doesn't seem to make an effort). It also creates the vibe she is sending signals to leave her be. Since I don’t have a sense of desperation to force anything , I frankly don’t chase. Only if something has started will I be a bit persistent, even then it’s gotta ping pong back and forth with the interest being overt on both sides. It’s not desirable for a women to be distant. However if she is available and nice then I am 100 percent encouraged to continue. Idk why women think guys like them to play hard to get. I feel this only attracts the worst types of guys. It encourages guys to overly pursue, try too hard for approval or not know when to stop. If a girl plays hard to get , then when she decides to change her mind on the guy and distance herself, she already created a toxic environment where the guy will pursue despite her being distant.

[@m_jay5]

Ruth made the first move with Boaz so I don't see anything wrong with a woman making the first move on a man!

[@user-j1spswelskisj]

Is it ok to give my phone number to the guy without him asking for it and see where he takes it from there? Or does it look like im leading or pursuing him by doing that?

[@samandsadie]

Just make sure to pray and surrender it over to The Lord, but I think that giving him your number is just making yourself available like Ruth did with Boaz!

[@user-j1spswelskisj]

@@samandsadie thanks for replying. If y'all don't mind, pls remember me in your prayers. I've been really confused and hurting for the past months trying to know and follow God's will. Thank you and God bless.

[@danilaroche1156]

​I wouldn't do it bit it's not a huge deal. Let him pursue you now.

[@lavished2lovedance509]

Love this!

[@ashleym1849]

i stopped talking to a guy cause i thought he got uncomfortable when i asked for his number. anyways he then got a gf but he still is trying to talk to me after a long time. last time he was coming into my department and now im always thinking of him. but i stay away because he has a gf. what does he want? he has a gf? whats wrong with him?

[@vivaeuropa]

Maybe he didn't like you so he got cold on you as a non verbal way of telling you he isn't interested. Now that he has a gf and knows you know it then he can continue being friends with you as you won't make anymore advances. If not that then maybe he isn't really a devoted Christian and may be trying to cheat on his gf with you but it's hard to tell because I can't discern how he's talking to you to see if maybe he has a jezabel spirit on him or not.

[@danilaroche1156]

He sounds worldly and grimy. Don't ever ask a man for his number. He's probably hanging around to possibly sleep with you or an ego boost..Steer clear, hon.

[@iElia]

i dont agree with the step back, because when i see that a woman is doing a step back i lose attraction because it feels like she isnt interested, so i go find someone else that doesnt play games.

[@samandsadie]

Hi Elia! The reason we said stepping back may be a good idea is when the guy is not pursuing the girl at all. If he’s not showing any interest in her, then theoretically he wouldn’t notice if she did take a step back. Hope that makes sense! God bless you!

[@iElia]

@@samandsadie Yeah that makes sense, because if i was clearly showing interest and she does that to me without telling me that she wants to do a step back then i would become uninterested. Btw i dont reply to someone i date when im at work that's normal right?

[@kimberlyturner820]

@@iElia but you're at work for 8 hours. Maybe you could send a wave or a simple wish that she's doing ok.🤷

[@iElia]

@@kimberlyturner820 I can text her in my breaks but during work i simply cant.

[@gabbie921]

@@iElia That's completely fine and reasonable and I'm sure she also has things to do during working hours. Communication is key though. Really the timing of texts is such a small thing, but it can become something major when the other party doesn't understand your intentions. You can simply say that during working hours you can't chat, but you'd love to chat in the evenings for example and you could also arrange phone calls / video calls, better for building authentic connection.

[@laelcaroline2023]

Thank you

[@crispyz2864]

I'm a guy, 18, and I can say alot of us guys don't like to chase. We dont want games, we want something real, at least I do Other than that good vid, just finished Ruth not too long ago😀Finding good women nowadays is challenging, I don't see a problem with making the first move

[@TrashGamer2024]

“Men like a chase.” I am a man and personally this is false. I like a Woman who is direct and Intensional, same as me.

[@danilaroche1156]

You think that's what you want but if she began pursuing you , you'd get bored.

[@ylondes9927]

​@danilaroche1156 Sorry you went through that?

[@heythere6983]

@danilaroche1156 Nope, if that didn’t work on a guy he simply didn’t have much interest

[@paddleman3131]

6:50 I can't say that applies to me. If she is distancing herself from me, I can't help but feel like she isn't interested in me. Want me to pursue? show me you want to talk to me.

[@samandsadie]

Definitely we agree with that too! We wanted to clarify that we don’t mean play hard to get, we really mean just to be careful not to come across as “too” available.

[@NathalieTaylorRealEstate]

Great advice!

[@ThinkGenius]

🙏❤️👍👍👏 God bless you!

[@samandsadie]

God bless you!! 🙏🏻🙏🏻

[@jim7060]

Good advice just don't stalk.

[@starlite5097]

9:00, lack of Bible education and the consequences of sin

[@sujinkim1974]

So is it still okay if a girl confesses the feelings first? I confessed and he said too that he liked me back. He told me that he was so scared to say cuz he wasn't sure what I felt so is this still okay if I as a girl did it first?

[@danilaroche1156]

I wouldn't recommend it but this could be an exception. Let him arrange meet ups and dates. Don't be too aggressive with it. After a few months he should definitely make his intentions known. If he wants marriage. No sex. I'd you do you will be crying a river.

[@sujinkim1974]

@@danilaroche1156 okay! thank you for telling! But I just feel peace around him and we have always so fun together without any romantic things. I've known him 2 years now. But so you would recommand me to not ask anywhere? I've done it many times..

[@danilaroche1156]

​How old are you sweetheart? Sounds like you friends and that's great. It really depends on the woman's intentions. If your not getting romantic or in a courtship towards marriage, no problem!

[@sujinkim1974]

@@danilaroche1156 i’m 18 and he is 19…. And well I said that I am not ready to date and that we both AGREED with it and that if its God’s will then things will HAPPEN etc. But the problem is that i dont want to waste my time and break his heart NOR mine. i really do like him so MUCHH. Idk Why but isnt it strange that we have been liking each other for 2 y now and like he has always been in y heart even in his fake relationship with another girl (it was a lesson ig to him to guard his heart) but he said he always had feelings in me and we both thought we dont like each other until some times and so on… but I’ve also been praying to God but I havent seen clear answers yet… Idk what to do… we hang out two ONLY sometimes to study or so on

[@sujinkim1974]

i'm 18 y old and he is 19!!! it turns out that we both haven been liking each other 2 years at the sametime but he thought iwouldnt like him cuz of i was "kind to everyone" . I would like to actually date him in the future. I said that I am not ready to date yet bc much is going on and if its gods will he will lead. And he agreed with me. I basically just confessed to him..... which is not maybe a bad thing. but the problem is that i really do like him a lot, he has always been in my heart even when he was in a relationship which didnt work out and i was there for him. He appreciated it so much. And also, he just has been alwasys somehow there... we are so good friends. I would like to marry hahah him in the future... but i'm scared that it wont be the case.... i dont wantto break his heart nor mine.... @@danilaroche1156

[@ninjakungfucat8617]

bruh but i don't wanna make the first move

[@TGFL_sound_etry]

Not every man likes to chase😢

[@bmellis1984]

The story of Ruth is such a beautiful story about a woman who waited for a man to be passed out drunk to have sex with him. He liked it but also felt obligated to make her his wife. In that day she could have been put to death by Stoning for what she did.. Just saying read it, the writer was being polite by just saying uncovering his feet. I'm going to wait much later to explain this story to my daughters.

[@Griot-Guild]

What's the real take away?

[@bmellis1984]

@@Griot-Guild kinsman redeemer. Interesting thing to think about. Ruth should have been stoned. What other woman do we see in scripture that should have been stoned?

[@SunFlower-qp2rh]

Amen

[@djgrant8761]

Singleness is the best life.

[@leaaptekar3593]

you guys are so cute :D

[@righteousfroce1254]

I call bullshit on that. Many girls get an attitude when men ask them out and will even call them a creep so it makes them not want to pursue anymore but if a woman came up to them and asked them out there's good chance he'll go for it. Fuck that I don't like to chase after women who told you that shit?

[@celichahlyngkhoi2866]

What if the guy I like doesn't have Instagram should I slide into his dms🙈

[@bellwetherone5739]

So explain; Ruth is a maid and is married, and her mother-in-law tells her to go lay next to another man!? And Ruth tells Moab to cover them both up, and says they are “close relatives” and then the man refers to her as his daughter? (Can someone translate this? Lol)

[@samandsadie]

Ruth’s husband died, so she was a widow. She laid at Boaz’s feet, she didn’t lay with him. It was common in those days for relatives of the deceased widower to marry a widow. When Boaz refers to her as “daughter” it’s a figure of speech, it doesn’t literally mean Ruth is Boaz’s daughter. Hope that helps to clear things up!

[@bellwetherone5739]

@@samandsadie thank you for a genuine answer.

[@mikecheatham6176]

Yesssssssssss they should. Take the risk of getting rejected 🙅‍♂️ just like guys do. Over all What’s life without risk?!

[@ciarrabataan6]

❤❤❤❤❤

[@jackcapellini113]

Why do men have to take the initiative?

[@g_factking]

To prevent men from being faslsy accused women should make the 1st move

[@disciple_of_jesus1110]

Do you practice yoga?

[@samandsadie]

No I don’t! I just like being comfy haha

[@adolfo.h.garcia]

That was very misinterpreted.

[@Mwahaha105]

Ruth approached Boaz. So it’s Christian for the woman to make the first move.

[@danilaroche1156]

I get resentment, even cattiness from women when I wear dresses or some jewelry and light makeup. Godly, church ladies! 99% of them wear all black or brown outfits. They dress like men.

[@hanbinkoo]

Lovely people!!

[@cm-lv1bu]

As a man make the first move even if that's putting your number in HER phone so that she can give a soft no with silence after you've left the area. A direct no to the wrong guy could be deadly for a woman so respect this! Ladies can definitely make the first move and take a guy out. That's called "getting sniped" which refers more to when someone makes the first move on a specific person they're crushing on. Turning the tables on the person seeking you by asking THEM out first is a counter-snipe. C