Should men always make the first move? | Men, Explain

With the advent of dating apps, dating and meeting new people has changed drastically over the past decade. However, traditional dating expectations such as how men should pay for dates have not changed much in the last century.
In this episode, Sonia and Ze Liang will attempt to answer the age-old question of “Should men pay for first dates?” and discuss how dating expectations may affect our dating life and consequently, married life.
LISTEN ON SPOTIFY: open.spotify.c...
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00:15 Introduction
02:02 What do people expect from their male partner?
03:07 Sonia manipulated her boyfriend to ask her out for dinner
05:28 Pet peeves on your first date
06:37 Who will pay for the first date?
08:25 Should men make the first move when it comes to text?
09:56 Should women propose to men?
11:44 Dealing with expensive dates
13:56 Sonia only eats at Michelin star restaurants?
15:48 Would Ze Liang date someone extremely rich?
18:05 Gender roles make people behave differently on first dates
21:00 Dating strong independent women
26:41 Going dutch on the first date
28:30 Are traditional dating norms shifting?
29:50 Dating should feel like you're equals
30:42 Conclusion
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Host:
Sonia Chew - / ​
Featuring:
Ze Liang - / zelcrust
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Business inquiries:
[e-mail]

[@Shioriichann]

Here is an interesting topic that I wish the host can expand a little bit about dating a partner with a different working time. Ze Liang mentioned that his work started at night and I would like to know what are his thoughts about having a partner that can accommodate to his working shift hours?

[@HumdrumSingaporeanREACTS]

😯!

[@kenjichu320]

They should discuss the dynamics of divorced men and women as well and how different it is as another talking point or discussion

[@itsclarityco]

Point taken! We'll definitely look into that for our future episodes!

[@HumdrumSingaporeanREACTS]

@@itsclarityco 😯!

[@lecherhao86]

Ladies.. you guys think too much. Guys ask for lunch because the whole day lasts longer with you. If it's a dinner date, you only have a few hours and it's bye bye. But if it's lunch, you can really plan to do a lot more things together. And if the lady wanna spilt the bill, then you can tell her she can do so the next date or be responsible to plan the activities for the second date. Oyah, my wife planned to propose to me and fortunately I did it earlier than her. Lastly, regarding salary, does it matter that much when both have aligned values and belief system? A lady or man who earns more don't have the right to request for a bigger say. If both parties bring food to the table. And if they keep it to certain percentage of their salary, then both are equal. And the truth is how much you earn depends on which industry you are in. There's a certain cap for certain job and certain industry. Success isn't defined merely by salary. Period.

[@itsclarityco]

😂Thanks for sharing the male perspective! Now we know lunch is good idea!

[@HumdrumSingaporeanREACTS]

@@itsclarityco 😯!

[@ropiqs6324]

Interesting!! Kinda hoping that you guys share on how to approach a person that you actually like because after this pandemic period yk, it has been so difficult and awkward to approach someone and start a conversation especially a stranger. Yeah it is kinda hard at least for me with the confidence and stuff.

[@Raphael-ql9pf]

traditionally, men provides and women take care of childrens. now, women want to be equal and got it what they wanted, jobs, career, rights to vote. Now they should share the responsibility to provide too. Extra gender in the work force, extra supply of workforce, lesser demand, lesser pay

[@lfaz4296]

But women still disproportionally do child care and house work. On top of working too...

[@evolutionite]

such good energy from the both of you! I love it.

[@DressedRunner]

2 weeks = 2 years for girls. My bros we gotta take note of this. I usually take 2 months of texting before asking a girl out, safe to say half of them ghosted me way before that.

[@eduantech]

Bro if you're interested in the girl, a couple days before expressing interest is already a bit long lol

[@15KKCCTT]

gosh sonia looks so good

[@HumdrumSingaporeanREACTS]

😯!

[@nobodysperfect06]

I agree with another user in which I don't see this ever becoming more common, as in, women asking a guy out or women being the initiators in starting a relationship

[@drkrpr155]

Q back at you Sonia: What if your bf was super rich and he’s like, all about his money? Splurge on you, buy you all the nice things. But the con: He only knows how to express his love for you via his $$. All other departments to express love = 0, looks = 0. So yeah, you’re settling with a walking ATM. But there’s no love there? Perk for independent women, you might get a lot more time than most to explore your own identity. 😁

[@HumdrumSingaporeanREACTS]

😯!

[@Tidyabqoc]

You do know who her bf is right bro lol This is gotta be a troll

[@calvin1252]

don't do that - she likes to live in an imaginary world where men are weak, poor and should be servile hence her preference for beta males.

[@Tidyabqoc]

@@sek898 ok but actl hearing theyve broken up already so who knows

[@zerocool85]

well... my first date with my wife was a lunch date..

[@flowerhuaer]

Smoothest interview

[@zehahaha603]

'Sit Down' 'Or just dont do the chores' YEA SONIA!

[@raymondchow285]

Hello. Any chance you can talk about age gap relationship?

[@Lala_lalacllll]

Yes!!! New season!!!!

[@HumdrumSingaporeanREACTS]

😯!

[@yangtzeling7468]

Lunch = friend zone Dinner = romantic date

[@23456JY]

If the guy agree or ask me to split bill, I know he doesn’t like me. If I insist fervently to split bill even if he rejects, means I don’t like the guy. But first of all I prefer guys who wants to foot the bill even after I fake ask to split - very gentlemen of them. Bottom line, guys who foot the bill is gentlemen regardless whether the girl likes u or not

[@HumdrumSingaporeanREACTS]

😯!

[@playmakersmusic]

Genuine question, in your case, is it okay for you to do household chores and cook in the kitchen?

[@gooddreams8495]

@@playmakersmusic she is a shit girl, why should we pay for her. fake ask for what, disgusting.

[@andrewwest7672]

i don't see that tradition ever changing

[@HumdrumSingaporeanREACTS]

😯!

[@lalalalaland84]

When the day comes that men can give birth, i think gender roles should be nulled. A lot of sacrifice (permanent) comes in being pregnant and giving birth. For women, getting married has a lot of sunk costs (I personally know many men who look for sex outside the marriage because they're not attracted to their wives anymore. They claim they love their wives but they need more. So there you go.). A divorced man doesn't face as much judgment and their attractive score is still the same as if they have never been married. They can start over easily in a new committed rship is what I'm saying. Have you ever seen stretch marks and excess skin on a mother's body? A lot of women have hormonal problems and other health issues after childbirth and they're permanent. Imagine a baby going through your penis hole. Yep you'd probably cry. Post partum depression, low self esteem, stress juggling kids and job. Don't be so calculative, that woman chose you and not someone else to wreck her body with. Surely that accounts for something. Women have always been nurturers and caretakers and men as protectors and providers since the beginning of time.

[@lfaz4296]

Yes.. that's why I don't agree with 50:50 relationships

[@gooddreams8495]

1 year of effort does not equal to 10 years of providing. Also raising a child is a two person work. Women just want to receive as much benefits as possible while contributing the least.

[@dawn7491]

Yawn... Don't think Sonia chose the right person to discuss this topic.

[@HumdrumSingaporeanREACTS]

😯😯!

[@HumdrumSingaporeanREACTS]

😯😯😯!

[@李珊-f2r]

That's not a date when you do Dutch Pay. Men always need to pay.

[@playmakersmusic]

Not true. If a woman want a man to pay, I always believe that the woman should then do traditionally household duties. You can't have your cake and eat it.

[@gooddreams8495]

@@sek898 yah sia, no reason for us to pay for her.