Sing For Bail (PlateUp!)

[@stalhein62]

Tonight on Jail or Bail, our next singer has the heart of a child but the police would like to know where the rest of the child is, and he's singing Jolene!

[@D34N6232]

Lets see... tiny restaurant? check tables as far away from the kitchen as possible? check plain pizza? check never picking toppings or sides? check Yep, it's a Hat Films PlateUp! video alright

[@vodskaya1088]

Something about the definition of insanity

[@scottg3192]

Cheers, wanted to check if needed to watch this one

[@OzgurTezerdi]

Another skip I guess It's been like what 2 months now? and still they are making the samemistakes

[@Isanion]

skipping this one as well then. Every video I check, hoping its new, and it never is.

[@jamescarroll384]

Yeah. I like Hat films, and I like watching people play Plate Up. But I just can't with these videos, I want to see them learn, think, and improve in a rewarding manner, or at the very least just explore some of the other content in the game re meals, variants, sides, and desserts. It's just the same boring ass plain pizza failstate in every video...

[@ScubaSteve0423]

FYI there is actually a difference between the starting sink and the regular one you buy for 20 gold - the initial sink you get is called a "starter sink"" and cleans at .75 speed vs. the regular "sink" which cleans at 1.0 speed. You can see this if you highlight the appliance in planning mode and hit the ping button, which will bring up the item card

[@CriticoolHit]

How dare you suggest they stop to read a tool-tip? That sort of talk is how you wind up a contestant on Jail-Bird.

[@ScubaSteve0423]

@@CriticoolHit I'll sing like a canary, I will

[@HelenaOfDetroit]

The moment when you realize the Hats always, and un-ironically, do the same thing Pedguin does when doing a difficult challenge. (Always take purple cards as example)

[@daniellatham73]

Move the tables closer, and don't be afraid of sides

[@mrjimi1]

Never thought I'd see the day when three grown men all completely miss the bit on the metal table card where it says sides are optional.

[@shanadir]

Wow, they don't even SEE other dishes. They completely ignore the first line of metal tables and only see the second🤯

[@callumh761]

Why dear god do they put the tables so far away ahahah

[@tyr8959]

aesthetics most important thing in a game like this

[@WelcomeBub]

keeps the filthy plebians away from the divinity of the kitchen

[@shanadir]

Gotta keep the waiters in shape. Cardio beats chaos y'know 😄

[@MetaDeviant]

Did they really choose a card that lowers customer patience dramatically when they're in view of them and then a card that hides customer patience entirely

[@dekkonot]

If you don't perceive it, is someone even impatient?

[@MetaDeviant]

@@dekkonot Ah, the old "out of sight, out of mind" trick, I see.

[@valantias]

They are absolutely terrified of multiple dishes/topping and will choose literally anything else lol

[@Starfyrez]

Dunno why they keep playing it, they just do the same thing each time

[@Bluemangrup]

@@Starfyrez They haven't played it in like a month and a half, they streamed multiple videos before Halloween, and it's easy to pigeonhole yourself when you play 5 rounds a day

[@Ferrinflame]

Gordon: This time, on Kitchen Nightmares. I'm headed to a small pizza restaurant run by a trio of lads who went into business with zero experience, and from what they've been telling me it's going about as well as you can expect. *Gordon walks up to the sign* "Well, hardly a welcoming introduction, is it? Let's head in and see if it's any more welcoming inside." "Hello-?" *Ross and Smith both standing over customers and shouting "EAT EAT EAT EAT!" or "SHOVE IT IN YER GOB AND GO!" before quickly seeing the renowned Chef at the door* "Oh, Gordon Ramsay!" Smith says first with a military salute and, though Gordon offered, declines when the Cheff holds out his hand. "I'd shake your hand, but I just had a wank over by the sink." "W-What?" Appalled, Gordon quickly shoves both his hands into his pockets, "F**k me, are you both taking the piss?" "No, Chef, only piss here is in the soda fountain," Ross adds with a shake of his head before pointing toward the kitchen, "He was re-stocking the oil for the pizza dough. Bloody shortages and inflation, we've been making oil in house with our pre." A noise from the kitchen somehow overpowers the Michelin Star Chef's instinct to run and instead the morbid curiosity to explore how deep this terrifying rabbit hole goes draws his attention. "I, um... can I speak with the chef, please?" "Sure, sure! You'll just head on through the dog kennel, through that door. Feel free to take a gander at the contestants we trapped with leftovers; we hold dog-fights after close!" Entering the kitchen, Gordon is greeted by the sight of a fully nude and glistening Trott rolling his whole body over a lump of dough on the flour-caked floor into a pizza vaguely shaped like an aborted fetus, a pump-bottle of olive oil beside him as he sings: "Take it off, all your clothes, this kitchen is emteh-eh-ey And much like my BUTTHO-o-ole, there's room for plenteh-eh-ey!" *pan to Gordon to watch him developing PTSD in real-time* Can Gordon save this restaurant, or will the health officials get enough complaints about pubes in the cheese to come shut them down? Find out when we come back after these messages from our sponsors.

[@SyntheticSpy]

I’m fucking crying reading this. Thank you for this work of art

[@thehulaoperator8356]

best fanfic EU (also I'm reading Ross' voice in his standard Geordie accent - if it is Geordie something Northern at least)

[@stylesrj]

*Find out when we come back after these messages from our sponsors* Kitchen Nightmares is brought to you by... RAID Shadow Legends!

[@stylesrj]

Although I don't see why Kitchen Nightmares would visit a restaurant in Plate Up. As soon as a customer leaves dissatisfied, the restaurant closes down and no matter what you do, the number of customers just keeps increasing so I'd say they're doing pretty well and making money and thus wouldn't need Gordon to save the restaurant... Yes I know, it's a joke but...

[@camicus-3249]

18:20 This show literally existed on CBBC (The Slammer) Completely fictional, but it's always fun to imagine it existing as actual reality tv (the winner gets released, so that's fun)

[@jamesfirkins5149]

My first thought also!

[@aecides3203]

As far as the dystopian game/competition shows go, the European one where they had contests in need of an organ transplant compete to receive it was...the peak. It turned out, quite quickly, that is was actually a social experiment done with actors to see if people would watch it and...yup...they did.

[@liudkas]

they picked victorian standards over ice cream?oh Hat boys... they never learn do they

[@ummwhodidnt]

This series was my introduction to Hat Gaming and I’m all for it! I now look forward to you guys coming up on my feed. Much love! ❤️ keep the great content coming

[@AshLilburne]

Love to see it. Every day I still watch their content from 10 years ago, enjoy!

[@Flashjackmak]

I have to say, as much as it always seems to screw them over in terms of difficulty, I do respect the boiks for choosing to master the plain pizza route.

[@fystrom]

Wash basin that stores 4 plates and washes them all at once - eeew no disgusting! Dish rack that just stores 4 plates which you then have to move to the sink - oh hell yeah it's vital!

[@RabidBlackwatch]

I don't know what to say anymore. Edit: You know what? At least they're doing something new by upgrading tables.

[@Prossay]

I know this was recorded months ago but i'll explain the metal table for the lads anyway, the Metal Table lets you ignore sides, even tho the customers ask for them you can just shove the mains down and they be happy about it, so the idea is you choose the side cards when you have all metal tables and you can carry on with the pizza's and ignore the sides, the idea is for making overtime rounds are easier

[@Ashtari]

Aka the Pedguin meta of picking all the sides just to ignore them as soon as possible.

[@Snight101]

@@Ashtari hardly a meta he created though, they're clearly overpowered since day one.

[@Jgray734]

Lads, as fun as it is to watch you just make pizza and nothing else, it would be nice to see other dishes and to branch out trying sides/starters/desserts etc

[@unknownmemoirs]

My god a liberal

[@conundrum765]

My god, someone who actually still views hat films videos instead of treating them like podcasts

[@sirBrouwer]

they have done so. they have made pie before.

[@lalnablehector1285]

@@conundrum765 my god, who asked?

[@Raida7]

Would definitely like to see the lads make pizza from scratch. Terribly with as much automation as possible, and also well

[@Unagodd]

Victorian Standards and Empathy...over *ice cream* and *onions as a topping* . The boiks are absolute mad lads.

[@Ashtari]

Trott has proven he can MORE than handle multiple toppings. The issue has always been the front of house aka Ross and Smith who seemingly want to play this game on auto-pilot and refuse to deal with multiple orders. So they continuously make things harder and harder for themselves and wonder why they can't get very far.

[@Unagodd]

@@Ashtari I think all of these videos have been from before mid-October, too, so it's still fairly early days for them, but they just have a very single-minded approach to what can theoretically work (pizza, portioner, plater, grabber) and won't consider anything else. So they stack up the most awful customer cards, pay no attention to +/- customers per day, and then run into walls because eventually the customers will overwhelm their tiny starter restaurants.

[@vogelvrouw]

They're too scared of options

[@Odyanii]

This is the first time I’ve ever seen anyone willingly choose Victorian Standards without a kitchen window build, and over ice cream no less! Also I don’t get why they will pass on a wash basin and then immediately buy a dish rack, when the wash basin is basically a sink that is also a dish rack. Saves space! Plus you can cheese it with multiple players as if you add another dish while someone is washing it doesn’t reduce the progress bar.

[@WelcomeBub]

to be fair neither victorian standards nor hidden patience affect throughput anyways in most cases, especially not with the basic pizzas trott mass produces. would be nice to see them doing a right card only build though

[@Unagodd]

@@WelcomeBub You're talking about productivity in *cooking* . That's not where the problems are. lol

[@WelcomeBub]

@@Unagodd I mean that the customer throughput isn't affected and the orders are simple enough that patience never matters

[@Unagodd]

@@WelcomeBub Well, I guess we'll see how far they get and if you're right. But I'm betting the run basically ended on day 4 when they picked Victorian Standards.

[@Bashnag_gro-Dushnikh]

Jingle Bails, Jingle Bails, Get him out of Jail! 🎶

[@sabermachine3296]

15:25 😂 I love this narration, so good👍

[@Millawls]

12:21 The Hat Films Hivemind is at it again

[@FlyLowPanda]

The bois should try making pizza from scratch in the warehouse

[@seankelly9301]

What a niche and oddly applicable Lostprohpets reference

[@GretchenDawntreader]

1:25 "I'd like the pizza slice you just dipped in the sink water please."

[@PurpleOwl79]

I love how they instantly forgot how to place tables to minimize the mess after they did it one time.

[@sconesaregood]

Smith singing some classics this ep

[@DonkeyWan]

He stole you car, now he will steal your heart...

[@jamesfirkins5149]

Theyre just describing the kids tv show from the early 2000s: The Slammer, on CBBC

[@awesomeaartvark]

There was a split second where the concept of singing inmates sounded like a fun show to me, but you're right, it would cause people to simp for awful people like they do with some murderers currently (which I still find insane). But what about people with like, low-level crimes? Like theft, or like the really technical/mundane crimes like tax evasion? I do think that could still be kinda entertaining, haha

[@jamesrush9172]

I love you guys playing this

[@karlomendoza2102]

5:10 oh come on. I though this was the time the boiks picked an extra recipe. Well time to keep looking at the fail with grace and panic.

[@andyboi8283]

You guys should try upgrading the prep station's to get frozen prep stations, then use grabbers from portioners into the frozen prep stations

[@TheOnlyOrk]

so dystopian

[@HelenaOfDetroit]

Please!!!!! Just add sides, dessert, new recipes for the main, etc. You're killing me!!! It's not that hard AND it reduces the number of customers AND it's essentially the only way to NOT destroy your runs. Just listen to your audience vote ffs! Please!love you boiks, but I'm dying

[@Unagodd]

One of the very early audience votes was obviously a troll, so I have to wonder if the boiks aren't just convinced they're all trolls. Except no, they really obviously refuse to deviate from anything but plain pizza, no starters/sides/desserts.

[@Mattym9287]

Victorian standards just seems like an instant fail. There’s no way they’ll do the overtime levels they got last time with that on.

[@capy123321]

Wow the tables are one tile closers, suspicious.

[@GamingWithNemesia]

there was a kids show on ABC3 kids that was prisoners sing for release from prison.... abc 3 the slammer 2006

[@TheAwes0meo]

Gonna watch this on double speed since I know they won't do anything new.

[@Drax-z]

19:18 sad thing is, alot of women actually think and say those things about serial killers. Ted bundy for instance.

[@7enso]

Interesting how those talking about "Definition of insanity etc." are the ones who come to every plate up video moaning that Hat films are not playing it the way that they enjoy watching. Also interesting that these people are the ones who say "You'll enjoy it more" when they're obviously having a lot of fun. Why do you keep coming back if you don't enjoy the way they play plate up?

[@vogelvrouw]

Hahaha thats pretty funny, youre right

[@divamon5602]

WOOOOOOOO!

[@Shiroar]

Back to rewatch this and had a quick scroll through the comments… why are so many about the gameplay? And weirder still, about the boiks not playing a game well? Clearly not the boiks but these viewers who are insane 🤣 Have they ever watched the boiks before? Hatters don’t watch them for gameplay 🤦‍♀️

[@ideadlift20kg83]

You guys in the comments need to realize these recordings are like 1-2 months old

[@Gallaelwyd]

Yote

[@MH-hu5pi]

At this point they're like a parody for that insanity quote. Why so bad? Why won't you learn? Why won't you improve? Why always pizza? Why bin the starting plates? Why the kitchen is laid that way? Why tables so far away? Why choose those cards? Why not ask ped for tutoring?

[@7enso]

Because they're having fun regardless.

[@lalnablehector1285]

why keep watching if you hate it so much?

[@MH-hu5pi]

@@lalnablehector1285 because they're my family

[@lalnablehector1285]

Then accept them for what they are and what makes them happy. You wanna watch pro plays and min maxing go watch ped.

[@MH-hu5pi]

@@lalnablehector1285 no

[@sethmlarson]

Downvote, and I love PlateUp content. Please do SOMETHING different, anything. I promise you'll have a better time.

[@Donn29]

Gogglehatbox? Hatfilms gogglebox watching big brother UK would be great!