Slim vs Plus Size RETURNS!

[@fridaaloo9548]

As a skinny person, I'll say, skinny shaming is real. However, it is more on a personal level. Fatphobia is a systemic problem that affects bigger people at a systemic level. Literally the structures that exist favor skinny people over bigger people: transportation, fashion, healthcare, media, etc. I have been skinny shamed at a point in my life when I was really small. It hurt me, but I must say I did not lose any opportunities because of being skinny, I did not lack representation in media, I did not struggle to find clothing, I did not have doctors comment about my weight being connected to my health etc etc etc. Fatphobia is systemic. Sometimes bigger people may find trouble finding clothing, may not see themselves represented in media (although hopefully things are changing to be more inclusive), are constantly bombarded by comments about their health (including by doctors), may encounter suggestions of weight loss programmes, I have even seen matatu touts telling some bigger women watalipia viti za watu wawili, their bodies are sexualized because when they wear maybe shorts or cleavage, they are told they are being too showy when thin girls would not receive the same comments...I can name more examples but the list is endless. Both these phenomena are problematic, but I think it's important to acknowledge the difference in scale. They are not the same.

[@carolinemwikali3121]

Wow ....this is the best explanation 👏

[@ednamukolwe9200]

Wow...well said

[@MercyKiplagat2011]

This is it! Well said, your comment should be pinned. You have summarized it all

[@monicahnjoroge761]

This! Very well put.

[@kadzobecha1234]

Very well said

[@wairimurommy5230]

Can we talk about how fat/skinny shaming starts with relatives especially those toxic aunties during one's formative years na saa hiyo mwanamke anaku body shame ako na ndevu na a triple chin, saitan.

[@carolinenjoroge1195]

😂😂😂😂 ati huat

[@peres1009]

Some relatives though

[@jwanjeri]

LOLs! Hurt people, hurt people, though. So let's be the generation that halts the cycle of hurting kids with words and then they grow up to be adults who hurt the next generation of kids, etc.

[@akinyisarah305]

@Wairimu Rommy aki surely 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@pixiekai1138]

This is true

[@sweetbertharwabizi7049]

I am waiting on the colorism conversation in Africa. That needs to be had as well. Julia, please make it the next topic.

[@puritykaranja6934]

Waaah this one is a very touchy subject

[@Msboochey]

yes!! these girls should talk about this!

[@wanguink3912]

Yeeeees

[@anitawambui9549]

Definitely... Please consider it for the next video...

[@naominganga7286]

Yes, talk about colourism too

[@Iamliterallyjustagirlonline]

The fact that you can call someone skinny openly and not feel anything vs trying not to call someone fat so openly....should tell you just how much these two are not the same scale or level.

[@vivianochieng7411]

THIIIIIIIS!!!!!!

[@Cece-fr7bp]

I love you for this comment and I am petite

[@LawChatsWithMadeline]

I wish I could be part of this panel so bad. I feel like you guys are determined to minimize skinny shaming. It almost sounds a talk to explain why skinny shaming is justified. Why must it be a competition as to why skinny shaming is okay but everyone must understand that fat shaming is wrong 😑 As a skinny person I can confirm: I don’t find clothes that fit me, Doctors have told me I need to gain weight, I have been shamed that I don’t look like a women because I’m too skinny. Being skinny in an African society is totally different. Why must it be a competition??? Shout out to the skinny representation she really hit good points

[@carolinemwikali3121]

Skinny girls will never know the struggle of being thick and thick girls will never know the struggle of being Skinny...Good convo thou #over25

[@dianamcgordon5243]

Yes you can if you've transitioned in both sizes. From fat to skinny and the other way around

[@carolinemwikali3121]

@@dianamcgordon5243 I have been both i prefer the skinny problems 🤣🤣

[@wanguigrace2957]

Yes... So lets NEVER discuss it.

[@thegodlyprincess_kenya]

Trueeeeee

[@faithkhaemba6161]

I have been through both and never going skinny 😭😭

[@annemuniu7927]

My biggest question is "Do men get body shamed?" 🤔You guys need to invite men to give their opinion, both fat and skinny men. 😄I'd like to hear their side of the story. As for women I know we all get body shamed, How about men?🤔 Leteni likes if you'd love to hear men's opinion. @over25

[@sharonwangari8378]

Yeah, they do. I think after this whole wave of getting ripped there's definitely been more towards guys' body shaming. I remember listening to a guy talking about his fluctuating weight since he was a kid, and having to deal with that even in his adulthood. Would be great to hear men's perspective on this #over25

[@kijana2030]

Men its more on height and length (if you know you know).

[@digitallocations1423]

Well, speaking as a lady I have only met one man who cares about his appearance the way I care about mine. The only other fit men I know are gym instructors and my late grandfather. God rest his soul.

[@mshoo92]

Of course men get body shamed. If over25 can do an episode on this that would be amazing. It's such a taboo topic especially in Africa.

[@tomokilabruce4853]

It hits harder I can tell you . I have been lucky but I have seen a boobed dude and dudes with azz being called lady names 🤦🏽‍♂️

[@yvettebernards7235]

For me I'm a thick girl and what I can say is skinny girls body shaming is more frequent than thick girls body shaming. Men in the African society prefer thick ladies.

[@vivianochieng7411]

Thank you, for this. I agree 💯

[@sharonkariuki46]

Men are not the only ones who body shame though, there's media, female relatives, classmates etc...

[@adahtindi8314]

Yees, this is so true💯

[@tinkerbell3667]

In the US it’s different. It’s either you look like an IG model if you’re thick or be skinny

[@agalhasnoname]

@@sharonkariuki46 I think women body shame each other more.

[@FarhanaOberson]

As a skinny girl myself, i enjoyed watching this video hearing my own struggles voiced

[@gracemasi1490]

You and I both 👌🏼👌🏼👌🏼 I struggle gaining weight 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

[@wanguigrace2957]

Me 3

[@Ndungu_Kamami]

What you mean?? Slim is the future

[@withthefacts2195]

Hijabeefied and Lornzie are on the opposite extreme ends of the thick-slim spectrum and if you listen to their stories closely they have nearly similar experiences growing up and that is mind-blowing. It really boils down to society at the end of the day because in the first place no woman is initially uncomfortable with her body type until society steps in with made-up standards.

[@alicemashanda9603]

Speaking as a skinny woman in Africa. I feel thicker gals are considered more attractive than skinny girls. Infact the thicker the better. In my society skinny girls are not recognised as womanly.

[@kijana2030]

Shida ni the sexual harassment that accompanies thick women is on another level 🤬

[@wanguikabungo7497]

They keep saying that you don't have hips big enough to carry a boy🤦🏽‍♀️

[@kijana2030]

@@wanguikabungo7497 I think it's time to name these people who are saying this things. And I have a sneaking suspicion it's older women like aunties and mothers. 🤔

[@Emgee101]

As a man, my preference is petite. Ladies should not weigh more than a/their man.

[@rosemaryngugi6328]

When all is said and done, let's not trivialize the matter and invalidate people's struggles whether fat or skinny shamed. All struggles are valid. Period.

[@kezmaina-doktari]

I could hug you right now. I mean, whether you're thick or skinny and you get body shamed... you're human and you're bound to feel some typa way. I wish we could let each other be, we can't all have the same frame and size..

[@darlenegikonyo250]

The comment section is proof of how we take away from each others truths. If a girl was skinny shamed, believe her. If a thick girl was fat shamed, believe her. I don't get why we want to prove one experience is greater than the other. Being body shamed hurts whether you are skinny or thick. No one has the right to say one or the other does not face it rough! It is just exhausting to see people be intolerable of each others experience. Accept there's a fundamental problem in society and act on that as opposed to who is right and who is wrong about body shaming.

[@tinamweru2583]

I love this comment so so much

[@siditaaka8357]

You are absolutely right. I always say, it doesn't matter what other people's opinions are about how I feel. I know what I feel, and at that moment, that's all that matters. If a skinny girl says that they felt attacked or shamed, best believe them that's their truth. If a thick girl says the same, believe them. It's their truth. Shaming is shaming. Period.

[@michellenjoroge3659]

Couldn't agree more!!!👏👏👏

[@wanguigrace2957]

Uuuuwi thanks for this comment... ❤️🔥🔥🔥👌👌👌👌

[@Habibtay]

I concur with you. Jules is so complicated. Maybe that's why she's the only one in her group left single. Ako na kiburi ingine

[@kkdavis64]

In this Era of big booties and thick thigh celebration don't wish to know what skinny girls are going through 😭

[@tamaraarama]

ohhhh you dont want to know. i was once asked 'why are you skinny ? dont you know being thick is the new pretty. weuh!

[@mimiesavali7395]

@@tamaraarama I feel you 😂

[@wanguigrace2957]

Am one of the rare skinny girls who literally STRUGGLE to gain weight. Most skinny people are underweight..ask your nutritionist. And hence why you'll hear us saying we struggle to gain weight.❤️❤️❤️❤️ Shout-out to my skinny girls struggling to gain weight❤️❤️

[@jemysaru]

@fancy kui babe you can gain weight the healthy way by incorporating body weight training This helps you grow lean body mass which is amazing...

[@digitallocations1423]

My God. I wish I could just give you my extra calories. I can lose weight in four months and gain it all back within a month.

[@vyonnewanjiru3324]

I'm going through a similar struggle so this and the last video were emotional....

[@misssheeku637]

Aki we really struggle to gain weight me the struggle has been to move from 52 to 57 it's been a five year struggle now and am still 52😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 just love whatever body you are in.

[@sylviasly2289]

We need a dark skin vs light skin one next

[@sellahchabe1248]

I agree.we do need this. Am dark in complexion. I was bullied for that especially during primary and secondary school. Even as an adult I still feel like light skinned ladies are considered to be beautiful than us dark. Skinned ladies.

[@sylviasly2289]

@@sellahchabe1248 me and you sis same

[@imani3975]

YES , we need one on Colorism in our society.

[@joyceodhiambo715]

When I was younger, 0-21 years I was a skinny girl and I was always told to eat more, added weight (from size 6- size 14) and now I'm told to eat less and work out by the same people who told me to eat more... Society will never let you breathe!!! You will always not be the right weight for people

[@njokiwanjau4527]

Story of my Life

[@HawasKitchen98dec]

what did you do to gain weight

[@ogoto-i5n]

This. My friends, this. Jipende. Love you. The person. Whichever size you get to for whatever reason no one will scar you with their comments. Not only about body size hata colour, hair, nails etc

[@TheMotivationHubPodcast]

@@njokiwanjau4527 SAME!!!

[@KonversationswithElenahKimaru]

Same struggle here....you can’t satisfy people

[@daisyndege7047]

Mimi mniite tu kwa hii debate !! The points I have bottled up about this topic !! The two types of shamings are definitely NOT the same.

[@debbiesharon9630]

One time I was getting ready to go for a run and my dad asked ,"what do you have to lose? Wacha sisi wenye tuko na vitambi tufanye mazoezi." I've been skinny for a long time and someone meeting my siblings and I for the first time would think I'm not the first born coz of my size. My folks think that something is eating me up coz I don't add weight no matter how much I eat... However,the best thing to do is accept your body and ignore the body shamers.

[@beccaroshi2112]

I relate to this strongly

[@evembugua3345]

I relate ...I have a niece alizaliwa tu juzi ako class six and she's bigger than me already .....the "kwani hukuli " questions are non ending

[@auudirowa7947]

This!!!

[@trinahwanyama3538]

I don't want to be the receipt girl, lol, but there have been so many times and in so many videos where particularly Shikie and Ivy have pointed out how they liked being skinnier than they are now. Hata as recent as their last "Issamotherhood" saying when they weighed 50kg , is when they looked their best. Si kwa ubaya lakini this feels like an * "All lives matter" * in response to * "Black lives matter" *. Ama the people with "Biracial hair" overtaking the "Natural hair" movement. Sure, there are some snarky comments hapa na pale, but skinny girls, it's okay to acknowledge we don't have it as bad imagine, lol :D . And I'm a skinny girl who has lived in Africa her whole life and Jules' arguments make sense in my head. I hardly comment. But 1000% I'm with Julez here. My theory is privileged people tend to overtake these movements, at first maybe to show empathy (like, I understand where you are coming from), but also at the same time to override the guilt of having been treated better than their counterparts. And with time, they don't realise they are showing the opposite of empathy to the group that needs it most. Skinnies, we don't have it as bad. And that's okay :'D There's a reason we weren't the ones who started the "Body acceptance movevent". The shoe doesn't pinch as hard. Tutulie saa zingine lol

[@kenyamyhomemycountry9155]

🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾

[@juliecacy_dishes9833]

Imagine I agree with you ...am also skinny always been,but on this am with lornzie and Jules

[@trinahwanyama3538]

@@juliecacy_dishes9833 Girl, I know. :) Let's help the movement by shining a spotlight on our beautiful curvy sisters too. They deserve it

[@juliecacy_dishes9833]

@@trinahwanyama3538 i've grown around plus size chics and guuurl..their struggles are like no other

[@trinahwanyama3538]

@@juliecacy_dishes9833 I know, right? :D I used to have the same talking points as akina Ivy, but I noticed that's literally gaslighting. It's like "How dare you complain when "everybody" is going through the same thing. We are all the same". When it's really not

[@ndegwa_1]

Ivy why did you say "ladies bye bye" at the end? Am I ladies 🤨 I'm starting to question myself for watching this channel so much😂😂. I might turn into Chandler at some point. Great content girls ❤️

[@root9941]

😂😂😂

[@vianneykarani1792]

😂😂😂😂😆

[@themusingsforum7672]

Pole on our behalfs haki haha

[@dr.felisterkomora6549]

😂

[@ndegwa_1]

Well hello @@dr.felisterkomora6549 😍

[@mboyamerl6031]

I have been called toothpick so many times, I at some point broke down, fell into depression ,was looking at myself in the mirror crying, I did everything possible to add weight. Body shaming is body shaming!! In Africa, being skinny is a noooo.

[@vivianochieng7411]

I’m turning 30 in a few months and I’m just now starting to think I’m worthy, I’m beautiful also. I feel you sis❤️❤️❤️

[@rourinishein]

Right, I have so many names up my resume as of now and they include: toothpick, skeleton, bones, Sickly, Matchstick, plank among others. Just two days ago somebody called me a skeleton and laughed so hard at me lol 😅. Cest la vie 🤷🏿‍♀️

[@Bella-ug2mm]

I've added so much weight during this quarantine period and I've been shamed for being skinny before and now for being bigger and I must say the fat shaming hit way harder. Someone recently saw one of my pictures and told me CONGRATULATIONS and when I asked why, He was like for your pregnancy and I find that very offensive...

[@wanguigrace2957]

Woi this discussion makes me feel like starting a group for skinny/petite babes and just do a whole documentary explaining our struggles😂😂😂😂

[@wacekekibe]

I support this😂😂😂

[@vivianochieng7411]

Start it please. I volunteer

[@paulineatieno3840]

Most especially with the erra of big boobs nd thick thighs...

[@nanaaishamurtala16]

Please do. We neeeeeed it😭😭😭

[@Lilywords]

😂This is a good idea

[@sharonmboya3577]

Julez and Lorna leo mumeamua it’s only your points that are valid.. Everybody’s point is valid everybody struggles differently don’t look down someone’s struggles just because you feel like it’s not valid periodt.

[@mytinylittlechannel]

You missed the point

[@joykiragu4492]

At the end of it all they did. They were just saying their truth. That's what they know. I'd also defend my facts if that's what I know

[@sharonmboya3577]

@@joykiragu4492 i agree with you. Plus this is such a sensitive topic and everyone will take offense with whatever anyone says

[@carolnjoroge1704]

I think you are mistaking their passion for intolerance....🤔

[@wanguigrace2957]

Me. Very excited to see a youtube video on how to gain weight. KZbin ad: "do you want to lose weight?" Am i a joke to you?😂😂🙆🙆

[@alexmurithi6748]

I was skinny shamed by my family. My grandma especially. I grew up hating my grandma especially because she had a nickname for me. People calling me sick or even saying I have HIV AIDS. I hated family gatherings because there was always a conversation about my weight. Out of all the guys I have dated,all have been Caucasian except 1. After I left kenyan, I suddenly felt so confident because I got comments about how beautiful a body I have. I am now in my 40s , married with 2 kids and still skinny and fabulous at 49kgs.

[@misswanzuu7050]

This conversation is making me so upset. I have been skinny shamed literally all my life and now we have to prove that we get hurt too? The thick babes are refusing to understand and it's not fair. I think it all came together in the end but a lot of unlearning and understanding is needed.

[@overtwentyfive7805]

This is true - A lot of unlearning and re-learning is needed, on both ends.

[@wanjikuwanjohi7225]

@@overtwentyfive7805 This comments is definitely by Jules

[@sandrar7099]

Fat shaming does not compare to skinny shaming at all. They are not the same.

[@birgitahbosih1530]

Everyone’s experience is different but also valid... .. y’all just need to be open minded to understand the other person’s experience. Skinny shaming is real, especially here in Africa , where thick is appreciated than skinny

[@misswanzuu7050]

@@overtwentyfive7805 Thank you for having the conversation.

[@maureengeorge9657]

In my teens I was so skinny I started wearing two pairs of jeans to try and fill up. I remember being told that "at a tukuweke Kwa Mutungi ya elianto uwezi nona" 😭 to this day I don't like being thin, I'd rather eat junk to try and keep myself a size12/14.

[@mukwamatabaimasiku3686]

Thick and dark is at the bottom of the food chain.I felt Jules there.

[@07neeruam]

True...

[@sellahchabe1248]

True I agree

[@ominolene]

fat

[@mercycnior]

I have been on the skinny side for 99% of my life. The shaming that came with it was no joke to the point I went on a fries, soda, all the junk diet to gain weight. That comment "aki wewe ni mdogo. Wewe ni mtoto ama?" got to me. We should just learn to not body shame each other as a society

[@mytinylittlechannel]

These are the kind of stories I need to hear to really understand what it was like on the other side. Thank you for sharing Mercy. Jules xoxo

[@lydiabildave7532]

@@mytinylittlechannel Jules mimi I've been on both sides. I'm just 20 years old. And I've seen it rough. Kwanza when I was thick and with my melanin. Then I lost weight nani😂😂 I was literally bones guys asked if I had contracted HIV... Family, friends and school was never there for support. I had to wear pull necks to hide my collar bones, took weight gain supplements but wapi. Then I just let myself be, I've started gaining weight. All I can say is, let's just love ourselves cz they will judge anyway

[@joykaranja3187]

Aki am sorry ..I don't know why I have always thought that's a compliment because I have always been a fat girl.

[@nanaedna5573]

In Africa especially being a skinny lady skinny shaming is so real. I just lost weight kidogo and everytime I meet my friends they are like what's going on you are so skinny. Again I have noticed even African men prefer thicker gals to skinny ones......and the sad part is gaining weight as a skinny person is a real struggle but losing it is so fast....if you know you know

[@overtwentyfive7805]

[@dulloomondi56]

A large number prefer thick ladies but there are those who prefer skinny or rather slim ladies. Ni venye unayempenda anapenda mwingine anayependa mwingine.

[@assumptanini4252]

True...I hate how my sister is normally asked... Kwani hukulangi...I remember clashing with a house help asking my sister where she came from that she is too thin.. Skinny girls get mistaken for students n even get less respect from waiters cz they imagine they got no cash to spend.lol

[@tabbytirop9018]

Yeees it's worse when you lose weight and you can't explain how it all happened, adding weight is a tone of work

[@pattyray328]

I can Imagine. I cant add weight. Issa stuggle

[@sema20]

There's a lady who kept telling me every day ' aki you are thin', she was big so one day I approached her and told her 'Aki you are thick' 😂😂😂. Since then heshima ilidumu. We all feel body shamed in different ways on whichever side you are.

[@darlenegikonyo250]

Also Hijabeefied's voice 😍😍😍😍 I could listen to her all day.

[@_sunshinecircle]

A lot of gaslighting is going on..everyone’s experiences and struggles are valid.

[@ivynamulindwa]

I think what I've learnt & taken away from this debate, as someone who's gone thru body shaming for being smaller than "average"; is that people who are seemingly bigger or considered so have gone thru the shaming for a longer duration than smaller sized people. Like as someone smaller our struggle gradually starts as we grow older, lakini for bigger people getting shamed has been a constant from their formative years all thru adolescence & adulthood. It's almost like it's more acceptable to be skinny. I love how real this whole convo was well done 👏🏽

[@itsjuliam]

I am the mother of a daughter in her early teens. I had to take her to a day school last week coz I need to talk to her daily to restore her self esteem. Last March, she was much slimmer. This month, she went back to boarding school having put on some weight & the girls have been extremely cruel. Speaking as older (40s) person who has been on both sides of the spectrum (currently size 18), I have received more shaming for being bigger. Wedding gown shopping was easy (I was an 8) & I saw bigger girls (12 & above) at the bridal shop being told what NOT to wear. After you become a mum, you are shamed for remaining bigger after the child has grown. I keep being asked if I am pregnant & reminded about my size 6/8 days. Smaller women with children are highly praised. My partner has a physique like Shiv & I am constantly encouraged (blatantly & subtely) to "accompany him to the gym, even if you just watch."

[@bochaberinyakundi7148]

when Jules asid...'Kwanza if you are overweight...AND Dark skinned...you are at the bottom of the barrel...i felt that on another level' I have experienced this in kenya....my weight stabilised....and i decided to be open minded about dating other races...

[@shahOko2664]

same

[@rourinishein]

Good for you. Dont limit yourself to people who dont find you attractive 👍🏿

[@yasminfarah7650]

Am new to this channel and todays topic was super relevant and relatable. As a somali in my culture being thick and light skin is synonymous with beauty, as such liner, dark skin ladies are also body shamed and believed not to be beautiful and that's why we are the number one clients of skin lightening products and fattening pills. I understand the struggles of thicker ladies as explained but also with Ibti and Ciku on society or rather specific cultures shamed skinny ladies. God made as all beautiful regardless of our skin color, body size, hair texture etc. and as you all brought out that change starts at home. I believe parents need to be sensitized on how to give words of affirmation to their children so that they start loving themselves for who they are. Thank you all for your different experiences and sharing your perspectives it was very informative.

[@kikilifestylemajor]

As a skinny person. I had to forget the society’s mentality and pick up my attitude and know am the it shit , even though we live in a society that appreciate the thick girls more ... The confidence I have is what is what pushes me to keep living , how matter how skinny

[@patriciahkiwara]

Waiting for the colourism conversation!!💯

[@sandrarose2468]

I've been both sizes but not the extremes. I can honestly say I'd prefer the skinny girl struggles. I came back to school after covid and I was almost 80kg from 63kgs. I was told indirectly that I've 'glowed down'. I honestly starved myself for 3 weeks. But now I've come to healthy eating, acceptance and self love. There's a time I saw my neighborhood kids playing. They were laughing at a chubby girl telling her "tell your mum to buy you new clothes you have a big stomach". she innocently went back home and honestly I felt like crying for her. From my experiences I feel like both skinny and fat shaming exists but you cannot disregard the fact that big girls have it harder honestly speaking. Its considered 'unhealthy'. I hate how when a big girl posts a picture in a bikini, the comments will always be in the line of 'I like your confidence'. Meanwhile skinny girls will not hear such. Why can't they just comment 'you look beautiful'?

[@getrudenarano8837]

Next topic please.Colorism.Dark skin girls Vs light skin girls. Differences in experience

[@07neeruam]

Yessssssssssss

[@edgylee977]

"But everyone’s journey with their body is different and you can’t trivialise someone’s insecurity no matter how small it may appear to you or how “perfect” they look in your eyes."

[@TangoMango-g4z]

I'm really loving this conversation. I like how you're all not hiding your opinions and being fully open. It's refreshing to see you guys hearing each other and engaging in a healthy debate.

[@dianawarira1720]

I thoroughly enjoyed this episode though at the beginning I almost lost it 🤣🤣🤣. Last time Ivy wasted us (the skinny girls) 😩😂😂😂. And your friend really did justice to the conversation bringing out the issues some people in society refuse to admit exist. Glad you’re now all on the same page- body shaming is body shaming. And very useful to acknowledge that body weight is not just about how much one eats. There’s metabolism, underlying health conditions, genes, a long list. Keep up the fruitful conversations ladies 👏🏽👏🏽.

[@rachealmuthoni3]

Very real topic. One day kindly talk about dark skinned and light skinned struggles

[@neemohwairimu9845]

Fat shaming is real, skinny shaming is real, everything shaming is real. It's the society we live in, sadly.

[@miriammugo853]

I love Julia so much....I co-sign her sentiments and opinions.

[@sonniescolours8195]

Every time we went to ocha that saying "kwani hukulangi?" plagued me well into my adult years. I learnt to accept it and gained confidence coz even my dad always had something to say " si wewe ulikataa kumea" and mind you I'm petit. 5 ft 2 and skinny i hoped i could gain some meat well into my early twenties. Now I have a child in my late 20s and went from 48kgs to 65kgs she is two and people are telling me to bounce back. Kwani what does this society want? im so happy i gained some weight and went to the gym and now people want to tell me that being skinny is great. SMH

[@oniniso5825]

Live your life babe. Societal expectations will finish you.

[@mytinylittlechannel]

Oh Wow!

[@blackopal2]

@@mytinylittlechannel Jules, you have a great body with all the cute curves girl! Block that voice is your head telling you otherwise, block it. Love and appreciate your body now, stop looking at the scale. There are different types of beautiful bodies out there, for example, all of you here today have different beautiful bodies/sizes. It is high time you embrace yours, please stop comparing yourself to others' beautiful, it will kill you.

[@godfreykashambuzi7636]

Awesome awesome conversation. As a parent of two very different body type children, this really helped pinpoint the need to positively impact the child in whatever shape they are coz the least a parent wants, is to have a child not comfortable in their own.

[@stacyatieno2354]

"You guys are not fat"-shikie This is what has been on my mind throughout both episodes coz julia hujanona. so me pia si relate na wewe..you're actually the right kind of thick most people want to be🤷‍♀️

[@Habibtay]

Exactly.. So I don't get why she's complicating matters.

[@mytinylittlechannel]

Nowadays, my body size is acceptable with the popularization of Brazilian But Lift and Anaconda (Nikki Minaj) and "Slim-Thick" (which I am not). This only started happening in the past 5 of 6 years. Unfortunately, it is probably because some man somewhere said (maybe rapped) that big women are also beautiful and sexually desirable.

[@sharonnjoki9143]

Lol then she is speaking for us and i feel well represented as plus size 🥰

[@muenimumo6670]

She is speaking for a lot of us who are not very big but are still termed as big by society. Those of us wenye tunaitwa wabunge😂😂😂

[@digitallocations1423]

@@muenimumo6670 Is that our name? 🤣🤣🤣 Khai

[@klassykinkycurls]

I feel like the plus size side should've tried to understand the skinny struggle without invalidating their feelings ...

[@mytinylittlechannel]

Okay, true. Jules xo

[@priscillahwamuyu6142]

I agree with you completely. Its not a competition since both people get mean and hurtful comments on their body sizes.

[@OliviaMukora]

Yup because this now has become a conversation of, fat people will be shamed more than skinny people It is different for either person on each spectrum but it isn’t right either way.

[@mollyjael6739]

I agree. Its not a competition.

[@normynorms4584]

Absolutely. I was skinny on school and trust me it was quite Terrible. People even used to call me the sick one and I'd be left out of activities sometimes because people felt like I wasn't strong enough to match up to their standards. It was quite terrible. So seeing people have this debate on who has it rough I'm like please just coz you don't know about it doesn't mean it didn't exist.

[@PurestofHearts5511]

This topic is interesting. Shopping was funny growing up. I'm a plus size and when I'd go to a shop and ask if they have my size, they would hand me like a dress my mother would wear, unfashionable or like a sack.. Just because its big. I've always known some skinny people who struggle. Everyone has body struggles and insecurities, hearing both sides is great.

[@doctoraudreymusanga]

F*** I knowwww... Kwanza shopping for Valentine's.... I get really mad

[@petronillahpyt1511]

This is a debate no one can win because no one has been in the person's shoes. But I like hearing it!

[@annclay6182]

I agree

[@maureenwambui2992]

Not true! There are people who have managed to gain and lose weight and have been on both sides of the debate, those people can speak on it.

[@carol76798]

@@maureenwambui2992 I have and I'm okay being skinny than fat..but come to think of it..its because I have hips so I don't think of myself as too skinny even though people and especially relatives insist that I am

[@zuri4life]

My sister lost so much weight one time mpaka my mum told her that her collar bones were protruding too much that it will be easy for her to be kidnapped...all they'd have to do is grab her collar bone and pull 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@TheMotivationHubPodcast]

LOL!

[@KonversationswithElenahKimaru]

That’s sad

[@sadia8721]

😂😂😂

[@faithfayed4726]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@sarahmbugua9808]

That's my mum.. I hv bn skinny for long but saa ii nimegain

[@purplespray3768]

I remember telling my uncle that I wanted to lose weight. I think the problem with being 'big' even when we're told we're hot is that as we're developing into our bodies is that we're sexualised earlier? I remember the onslaught starting when I was 9/10?

[@purplespray3768]

As a child. When I was in class 4

[@salmanyongesa9906]

I totally agree. I have a twin sister and we were raised differently because of our body types. When growing up I was told to cover up more just because I was/am very thick and she is skinny. I don't think it's fair especially for pre-adolescent girls

[@puritykaranja6934]

This one I totally get. I was in class 4 and could feel men staring at me in a weird, them trying to hug me, I just knew it felt wrong. Never been happier leaving for boarding school

[@TheYANGpodcast]

Deep

[@binweitendo6682]

cray thing is i am thick but top heavy, that confidence to walk out feeling fabulous when like that is a whole other level because even in this conversation of thick i am still ot represented or i am classified as thick that is not the sexy one. I do get realtionship but i manage to convince my self that is bcuz of personality, not a bad thing but in the context of feeling beautiful on the body spectrum i have never felt in place. ( i am even dark skin heh! whole other thing) i am figuring out every other day how to safely enhace my hip size and somewhere in my mind ill reduce my breast soon as i have money to do that, i dont even like looking at my self on some angles cause i dont believe that i look good to myself. I choose for it not to stress me out but sometimes it gets really real and to be frank if you see me in person i might not be ugly but my everyday life is a struuggllee. it makes me worry about getting pregnant.

[@donnaawuor1788]

They literally made the world for skinny people. Everywhere you go in planes, in public places, even the chairs are not made considering fat people. Even when shopping for clothes. My gosh!!! So the shame skinny people experience is not and can never be the same. We skinny people can argue until the cows come home, but trust me, we all have the privilege compared to fat people.

[@mytinylittlechannel]

Thank you for that acknowledgement.

[@merciemoringe5946]

I'm a plus size.. And this means a lot.. 👏👏

[@Funonabudget]

You just reminded me how i struggle in those plane seats and have to get an extra seat belt to fit in

[@carol76798]

Umeongea kama wanawake kumi

[@kodj254]

@@carol76798 Hii si tunaezasema ni fat-shaming 😅

[@ireneakinyi7121]

Ivy today came with reinforcement

[@doc4085]

Kabisa! 😂😂

[@winniewambui7423]

Jeshi

[@moraasheila6963]

Growing up fat is telling people your age and they swear you are older as if they gave birth to you🙄

[@chiku4082]

🤣🤣🤣

[@moraasheila6963]

@@chiku4082 I swear. The number of times I tell people my age and they look shocked 😂. Ati are you sure hukupunguziwa miaka. Idiots!

[@samuelbaraka4705]

😂 aty haukupunguziwa miaka

[@moraasheila6963]

@@samuelbaraka4705 yup😂😂

[@gracenicholls4583]

Great discussion. Really tried to follow through but it got hard when everyone started to talk at the same time🙁 But I agree that the effect of body shaming is the same whether you're skinny or plus size. Absolutely loved how y'all complimented each other😍

[@miyobamweetwa6348]

something caught my attention, on what to do if you are the parent of an overweight child. I learned something rather early in my life from one of the mothers in my family regarding something similar, a member of her family was advised by a medical doctor to change their diet due to some health condition. It was very difficult for that person to adjust, so what this mother did was offer hands-on support, she changed her diet too, and eventually, that whole household was eating healthier, and that way the diet was easier to take on for the person who really needed it. In this light I think it would be really helpful for a parent of an overweight child to just change the eating habits of the whole house, while it may feel like a huge sacrifice I guarantee it will be worthwhile in the long run. that way you don't need to tell the child they are overweight, and you take steps towards fixing the issue without hurting the child's feelings.

[@lizmokobi7702]

I’ve been called a matchbox, toothpick and many other words but We can all learn to empathise and lean towards each other’s struggle.

[@wambuimwangi6082]

I was sooo fat in primary school my schoolmates called me Yokozuna can you imagine

[@kenyamyhomemycountry9155]

I absolutely Love it when I’m told I look skinny than when I’m told I look bigger. It ain’t the same at all! I’m with you Julez.

[@saidiv.1533]

This past December in ushago one of my mom's friend asked 1.Mbona umekonda na haunyonyeshi? 2.unatumia family planning gani ndio inakukondesha? I was speechless! like wtf Mind you Iam 64kg and a size 12

[@suerhouz]

Being blown by the wind is a free mode of transportation.😂😂😂😂

[@michellenawi2177]

😂😂😂😂what!! 🤣

[@wanjirukinuthia6599]

Growing up I had a cousin who was 'considered thin' and I was 'considered fat'. We all used to shamed though we were clearly on opposite sides of the scale and I remember we shared the plight of being shamed. I can't say there's more or less to whatever side. Bodyshaming is bodyshaming and it is ugly.

[@mcnthia]

Comment repeated from the 1st video: When it comes to body size; I strongly believe that no size is better or worse than the another. In life there's always variety same way we have different colors in the rainbow we have different skin colors we have different body sizes. So to each, their own. None should shame one size/shape over the other, or demeaning one size and uphold another size. We cannot all be the same the same size or shape, we cannot all be the same skin color because we are not. When it comes to dating and relationships same thing applies we are attracted to different types of bodies so if you are attracted to & like think women, then go for a thick woman leave the skinny girl alone and don't go pressuring her to eat a burger & to gain weight. And vice versa; if you like slim ladies, go for the slim ones, don't go for a thick lady and start pressuring her to loose weight & make her feel less than & unattractive. For the ladies if you prefer that gymed up guy who is built like a brick house (*insert wheelbarrow here 🙈🙉🙊), then go for that. Don't find your average Joe and start pressuring him to go kill himself in the gym to look a certain way and if you like a slim guy go for the slim guy (*Sit on his face, if he dies, he dies😅😂🙊🤷🏽‍♂️), if you like chubby guys go for the chubby guy. (*Leave D'Angelo alone ooh🤣) The same applies to height & skin colour. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. & Beauty is anyway only skin deep. True beauty lies within. We're much more than our looks. Let's learn to value people for who they are not just for what they look like or what they have. Let's learn our individual self worth and love & embrace ourselves as we are even if we are striving to change. Choose to be happy with yourself.

[@mariannahm7386]

I would literally go to a boot camp to gain weight.. this could actually be a business idea 💡

[@pennykaranja7202]

Me too!

[@gracesila8881]

True when i saw Lillian mulis show slim possible i was like, and why can't the skinny ones get such but I've made peace with my weight. Irris what irris

[@miriammburugu2855]

I love the conversation on how people's mindsets are tuned based on specific factors. How about covering a segment on acne and how it affects us as women/ladies/girls especially in the dating and marriage spectrum.

[@irenenduku4043]

I loved how the conversation shifted.😂 I went through the motions with Julez I was literally debating with myself .loved it!!!

[@TheLydia1986]

I remember when i was younger in my teenage years to be specific, my uncle and mum once called me a scarecrow because i was very skinny. I cried the whole day as a result of that. It has stuck with me to date.

[@jolynnnyakio8397]

Really loved this debate. I think y'all should do the tall vs Short experience.

[@sharongilbert8683]

YAAAAAAAY!👏👏👏

[@brendarutto]

I suggest that too

[@sparklemonkey3262]

Am a skinny girl, been skinny all my life. Recently a guy am seeing casually remarked " .....you're too underweight to carry a baby......" Been wondering what body size should carry a baby🤔🤔🤔🤔.

[@aygeem1764]

I'm skinny too...and your comment is just hilarious..bit btw what size should carry what size? I hear that skinny girls have an easier time pushing 🤗

[@winnieoyola8776]

That man doesn't deserve you sis

[@brendarutto]

The same man will complain you are too fat when you have a baby, smh.

[@mndanu_ke]

I can feel Julia's struggle... We all struggle differently. Bottom line, be comfortable with what we can't change.

[@stephny789]

I can relate to both sides to an extent. When I was a size 6 I was told I'm too skinny, unhealthy, I'm not eating enough etc., but there are people who liked my size. When I moved to a size 10 everyone had something to say about the weight gain. I was told, you're no longer the skinny one in the room, comments about the tummy that came with it etc., but there were also people who liked that size. In both instances, I've been made to feel bad even by my family. You wonder what people want. Shaming is real on both ends and at the end of the day it boils down to personal preference. People will always have something to say so you have to love yourself at any size. If you want to lose or gain weight, make sure it's about you and how you feel about yourself.

[@prettyck6330]

I have been both skinny and thick. It hurt when my cousins would tell me I got no ass na niko na tuthundo(boibs) now that am thick the same people are like umenona sana! It just hurts the same.

[@digitallocations1423]

Tell them to leave you alone. Pole aki.

[@kaimurimagu5804]

Bodyshaming, any kind of shaming is a weapon to belittle the other person for several reasons including - either to humiliate them so that the shamer can feel on a more even keel than they are because they're superior in some way, or to feel better about themselves by doling out misery, and in the case of shaming children for their body size - to either ensure the cycle of shaming they endured is carried forward to the next generation or to take a stab at the mother through their child. Children are cruel because they're taught to be and it's modelled to them and they use it as a defense mechanism - so they hurt, bully or shame others so they can distance themselves from the same thing happening to them. The truth is there's nothing for it but for the mother to defend her child - to tell off the shamers and silence them and explain to her child the dynamics of society and how people play out their insecurities. I was a super skinny child, late bloomer, and even after pregnancy I went back to size 10. There was always the struggle of not feeling womanly enough or pretty enough and to get a boy interested (like pulling a junk+ extra helpings diet for a year to put on weight after highschool and it didn't work🤣💦)- and one MUST learn to deal with that ... Because now I'm on the other side of the conversation -plus size at last, all the curves I had missed out on... And yet the insecurities just changed sides as well - because now there's a little extra here and there that wasn't there for decades, what does one do with that? Suddenly terms like "bodysculpting workouts" became familiar, and buying clothes in sizes three or four or five upwards from what one knows all their life is a TRIP! By the time you're dealing with this other style of shaming 🤦🏾‍♀️... The thing is if you don't teach yourself to embrace all that you are at whatever point in your life that you are you will be broken no matter which "side" you're on. There's the other element of bodyshaming chubby girls that has to do with them being sexualised young. If they're allowed to interact with perverted minds - househelps, male friends and relatives, fellow passengers etc the looks or gestures or comments they're subjected to are pretty damaging too. As early as 9 or 10 years old or even earlier, a girl can be made to hate herself and her body because she blames herself for attracting that kind of disgusting attention. So even before she's bodyshamed there's already a foundation for the shame to stand on. Again, parents MUST be present and vocal to their children, and to those who even suggest the slightest foolishness. But we also learn need to learn how to use clothes as armour and protection for bodies as well as expressing our personalities, rather than today's fashion of constantly placing our bodies on display...which is what clothing was originally intended to be🤔 I'm so glad you guys did the follow up of this episode. Jules, please bring the colorism discussion - we are waiting.

[@thealuway]

Ivy is out here not relating. After having twins wueh,, and her body is just DAMN🙆🙆

[@mytinylittlechannel]

That is a goddess. I can never relate to her

[@kijana2030]

At the end she said she's having a problem with being size 10 🤷🏽‍♂️

[@fiffieatis6156]

@@mytinylittlechannel ur outfit,make up n input is on point - real n authentic 👍🏾

[@shirleenmungai3210]

I've been a size 6,and i've been a size 12....i was bullied for both .I totally resonate with both sides.

[@margaretmwangi7063]

As a skinny person who was always bullied in primary school for being too skinny. The whole of class 7 and class 8 I was told I have aids, mara I have kwashiakor...I was never taken seriously or given that type of "attention" as compared to thick girls in primary school and because of this I did attempt suicide once and also got into serious depression after that...its not fair...now I'm a bit thicker but still people now assume that I'm knocked up. So I'm always being told "congratulations" all the time yet I just have a fupa. There's no winning on either side. Body shaming whether thick or skinny is definitely there. It took me till university for me to think that I'm not too skinny to be attractive.

[@MumbiMusicOfficial]

I think the moral of the story here is to find the size that you best feel comfortable in and maintain that for yourself because there will always be someone hating and at the end of the day the only opinion that should matter is your own!

[@mabutingugi206]

Ivy's "I will not talk today" ISN'T Julez "I will not talk today"

[@aluochonyango]

I have tasted both sides of the spectrum, in high school I was chubby and it wasn't nice when people commented on the amount of food I ate and how 'big' I was. They were snide comments but they still got to me. I remember being afraid of wearing short dresses and booty shorts just because.....Bikinis were a no go zone . Theeeeeeeeeeeen...... life happened, sis got sick and lost tremendous weight and I can't hear the end of it. I get all this tips on how to gain weight. I'm even told to stop stressing and thinking a lot so that I can gain weight. I've been told I don't belong to our family coz I'm the one that's skinny🤦‍♀️. It goes on and on and I'm tired of it....no one ever really stops to think about how I feel about myself. It took a lot of self acceptance after I got well but I can't even enjoy that because I am constantly reminded that I had an illness that ate me up and now I have to strive to belong gain and that's just messed up. I can't even

[@truphenakerubo8982]

Hey girls, allow me to comment today. There are challenges of having big sized body or small sized body. I would say at any point in time think about these things 1. Onset diseases due to too much fat storage or overwork of your internal organs e.g Kidneys, Liver, pancreas etc. 2. Dress to manage your curves(Chubby or skinny) and excess fats storage areas to discourage funny public attention 3. Love yourself enough, to maintain proper nutrition and daily activities for body maintenance. 4. its not about the public's comments, its about you. its not easy to control people's views, comments, opinions and suggestions such that at any point in time its not about people's comments but about yourself and how healthy your body is depending on the right things you are doing it

[@elsienaserian5597]

Cant wait for the dark skin vs light skin

[@DK-pi1bj]

Putting my dirty laundry out there because of the lack of empathy from the thick babes in this video: I have been body-shamed all my life. In fact, I've been dumped by two of my exes (serious relationships) for no other reason other than the fact that I am skinny. Mind you I was skinny when they met and courted me, sio ati I shat myself thin in the course of our relationship. I also have a child, but I am literally back where I was before (fluctuating between 50-54 kgs.) I've been on the receiving end of snide remarks from so-called friends too (you get a warning, a strike then I cut you off, expeditiously.) Body shaming is body shaming, and no one's experience is greater or more important than the other. There's a silver lining though, I'm in my 30s and look at least 7 years younger ;)

[@rosemaina5727]

@DK I feel you. I was nicknamed Skele in primary school... and clothes not fitting right. I picked weight in my 30's

[@stella1886]

It's not really their fault.. they're not coming from a place of malice, they're learning.. we all are really. Can't deny the thick girl experience but now we understand where the skinny girls are coming from. We feel you for sure

[@vivianochieng7411]

I just feel we are more forgiving of people who skinny shame than those that fat shame. We say “it’s not their fault” because they need to “unlearn” and meanwhile I’m being skinny shamed and I should find it nice to be told I can be blown by the wind??? If I dare fat shame anyone I’m not going to be told how “it’s not my fault” let’s call it what it is. Body shaming is IGNORANCE EPITOMIZED!!! Period. Whether it’s skinny shaming or fat shaming. None is more forgivable than the other

[@jwanjeri]

​@@rosemaina5727 apart from being nicknamed "skele", were you discriminated against as well? As one on the skinnier side, recall the "skele" remarks but cannot recall kids refusing to sit/play with the skinny kids or stuff kids did that was forced to sit out. Those who were on the heavier side did get the remarks too, "fatso", "kanono", but theirs went further: can recall the heavier kids being picked last in games and sometimes outrightly being left out in the swinging, swimming, racing kind of games or even the Jules example of being told "Nope. Sikupati bike. Utaivunja"?

[@rosemaina5727]

@ssk as @vivian ochieng has put it, none is better and the experience of one doesn't invalidate the other. When you're always described as the thin one or hoardes of boys calling you skele during break it can screw you a good one. You're an adult handling image and esteem stuff. Best way around it everyone is beautiful and no one should have an opinion on anyone's body. My take.

[@edawere9952]

I once didn't get a modeling gig as they told me I'm too curvy though they loved my walk. 🙄

[@MNancyKE]

I have been both and I understand being skinny shamed is real. I was 49 kgs during my first Pre natal check up and the nurse was so curious as to how I will carry a whole person inside me. She even insisted to my Husband that he SHOULD make sure that I feed well.smh. I'm now a size 10 and guys say I look better. ghai

[@evakimani4500]

Very interesting topic. You guys should watch a TEDx talk by Chimamanda Adichie called The Danger of a Single Story.It really encompasses how you were all able to begin seeing each other's side of the story. Also, I'm eagerly waiting for the 'dark-skinned girl' shaming conversation.

[@adventureswithphi405]

Monday just went 0-100🔥🔥🔥 Loooove the consistency 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@afandilayla]

There is no winner in the struggle olympics. Your response to someone else's pain cannot be "I don't know that pain.I only know my pain therefore my pain is the most painful pain."

[@vivianochieng7411]

THIS

[@shazziewanjiru]

THIS... !!! Yet PAIN is PAIN!!!

[@mirriammaina6860]

Everyone has their own challenges, it’s important to acknowledge that some groups experience more than others. Like woman over men, black or white, small or thick...

[@carol76798]

wisdom

[@gakiikinoti4514]

but one thing I learnt to do, to survive these streets is if someone calls me a giraffe or enda ukule nyama uongeze weight, I returm the favour. I got all the time baby.

[@cyndy9386]

On a related topic, is there also such a thing as height shaming? I personally feel like tall girls and short boys are really shamed in Africa.

[@imani3975]

Thats an issue in majority of other places too

[@crystalmargarita6014]

Loving this. I just learnt that i take so much for granted especially regarding the skinny people

[@swagaamin3982]

Also I love Hijabeefied in here, kindly frequent her appearance on your channel❤❤..more love to y'all😍

[@marymumbi1120]

One of things I look forward to on Monday😊keep up the consistency 💯