South Park: Cartmanland Reaction (Season 5 Episode 6)

[@hunterivey]

I laughed so hard, when Kyle said, "People are starving in Alabama," and I live in Alabama.

[@danielcesar664]

Was he lying tho?

[@Z3sty367]

I can send you some canned goods my guy

[@REALAMERICANMAN531]

Bro get some food........

[@folsom9790]

Is there a way to donate🙏🏽🙏🏽I am so sorry

[@chrisroney4948]

Everyone comment just made this way better lmao

[@rquakkii]

This episode cracks me up. Kyle getting a hemorrhoid because of Cartman’s fortune, Kyle was literally butthurt. And then Cartman’s suffering on its own completely heals him, if that doesn’t scream arch nemesis I don’t know what does

[@83gemm]

Hemorrhoids are generally just annoying. They can itch pretty badly and can make it hard to defacate if they are close to… you know, the opening, just because it’s easy to make them bleed. You usually get them due to straining or age, so overweight people, pregnant people, and older people get them most often, but anyone can get them. (Cartman would be more likely than Kyle, but the whole point is it’s unfair that Kyle has one.) Anything that gets infected can be dangerous, but they steadily made Kyle’s symptoms more ridiculous for comedy. The line about the hemorrhoid spreading to his lungs is hilarious. And I will never not crack up over the animation of the hemorrhoid going into remission.

[@imtoostonedtocomeupwithaus5976]

They fucking hurt

[@Uta_Chandra.H]

Does it grow Back??

[@83gemm]

@@Uta_Chandra.H It’s just a blood vessel that’s irritated or swollen, so you can get them more than once if you don’t solve whatever caused it.

[@chrisakaschulbus4903]

I mean your blood combined with your excrement could be a potential risk. At least it doesn't sound healthy.

[@chrxs61632]

Hemorrhoids suck. They can really be infected? Isn’t that rare

[@punishernumber13]

As a 3 year old kid, my father and I got stuck at the top of a red lookout tower at an amusement park with more then five flags. We had to take the fire escape all the way down. I am now in my 40’s and still scared to death of any high places.

[@chairwood]

wow that's scary

[@justjoshua5759]

Yeah that’s terrifying. Glad you guys made it out alright but don’t blame you

[@chairwood]

@@justjoshua5759 I blame him

[@DisfunktionalTV]

Damn!!! That shit traumatized you bro

[@azuth11]

18:28 The way Cartman exploded at a kid having fun with his dad, I thought might be because he is the only one in his group of friends without a dad.

[@DisfunktionalTV]

Its possible but he was just mad at everything at that point lol

[@official.lilbig]

If you want a formal introduction to Cartman’s family, check out “Merry Christmas, Charlie Manson!” episode 🔥

[@DisfunktionalTV]

Bet thanks!

[@b3rz3rk3r9]

​@@DisfunktionalTVIt's honestly a hilarious episode as you can see where Cartman gets it.

[@dreadmonkey6811]

If Kyle had just waited for Eric's business to naturally crumble,I don't think Kyle would have suffered like he did..if he had realized Eric had no idea how to run a theme park in any way. Also..his grandmother gave him 1m..and he blew it all only to lose everything..way to go..

[@wivyrn]

No, the entire episode was building up that Cartman actually DID know how to run a theme park. Cartmanland didn't crumble because he sold it at a loss. The business was doing GREAT. Cartman only got screwed because what he was after wasn't the money, it was just so he could have a badass theme park all to himself. His loss was entirely self-inflicted, not because he was incompetent, or because he was greedy (for money anyways), but because he's the world's fattest douchebag.

[@jasondyrkacz8270]

Seriously, all Kyle had to do was be patient.

[@Based_4_Life]

He did try to wait out, but then the money guys on TV called him a financial genius. And that's when he officially gave up.

[@alfiejohnso5967]

You didn’t clock Cartman saying ‘Kenny? He dies all the time’ Which means he knows about Kenny’s immortality

[@brandonb.5304]

They're definitely exaggerating about the effects of a hemorrhoid. Usually they're just very irritating and itchy. They can become painful, though--if left untreated. And if you burst a hemorrhoid it can become infected, but not to the extent that it can kill you. It definitely doesn't spread to your lungs lmao.

[@Uta_Chandra.H]

That gives a little relief but I still hate to have it

[@TheresNoWay.]

Well yeah, it’s South Park, the essence of exaggeration

[@Forrest1989]

The point is that Kyle had given up on life, so the infection that normally wouldn't have been life threatening became deadly.

[@brandonb.5304]

@@Forrest1989 Yeah, I know. I was just answering his question about if a hemorrhoid can kill a person.

[@Forrest1989]

@@brandonb.5304 a hemorrhoid, no, but a bad infection, maybe..?

[@nathanwilkins6107]

You know, Cartman could have just… made himself super supreme VIP and said he was allowed to cut to the front of any line. But that would require more thought than his rabid squirrel brain can manage.

[@TheGGod]

He is 9 and ran a business

[@alexia4251]

@@TheGGod not only ran. But he revolutionized the business model. And flipped an entire theme park

[@MsAngelique]

​@@alexia4251But didn't pay taxes.

[@mckenzie.latham91]

But the point is, it’s not just about the lines, Eric doesn’t like dealing with crowds of people in general

[@geistescrashednana933]

Are you really angry about cartman?

[@azuth11]

14:39 “I thought it was supposed to be shoot on sight? I’m feeling kinda ripped off there, I’m not gonna lie.” That killed me my man.

[@sleetarashi]

Well he did technically "shoot" him with pepper spray

[@LeesReviews69]

12:32 I have internal hemorrhoids that if I push too hard I’ll have blood in my poo, or if I have diarrhea. It does not stop me from enjoying life riding roller coasters

[@davidsan9654]

I never understood why Kyle's parents read him a book from the Christian bible...not to mention they left out a pretty important part in that Job gets back everything he lost ten times over.

[@TheThunderbirdZero]

You would think they'd remember to mention that part.

[@RyunosukeHachi]

Been looking for this

[@bobapjok4241]

while Job is in the Bible, it's actually old testament, so it is part of the Jewish Scriptures as well. The Hospital probably has Bibles, so they could just look to the Old Testament to find the history of Job

[@bobapjok4241]

@@RyunosukeHachi while Job is in the Bible, it's actually old testament, so it is part of the Jewish Scriptures as well. The Hospital probably has Bibles, so they could just look to the Old Testament to find the history of Job

[@Forrest1989]

He never got his loved ones back. He got a new family. You'd think that the "creator of everything" could raise the dead, but apparently not..

[@xeebunny2751]

There’s several early episodes showing Liane either doing drugs while with other men or others jabbing to Cartman about his mom smoking crack, and in The Stick of Truth game if you rummage through Liane’s room you can find broken pipes and toys everywhere to collect and/or sell.

[@blaketindle4703]

As someone who gets hemorrhoids occasionally, I lmao at the depiction of it being a bug going down his rectum while screaming! 🤣

[@connorredshaw7994]

Security guard: move along sir! Cartman: AY! You used to work for me! ( Guard sprays pepper spray into cartman's face) That part cracks me up 🤣

[@seesawseesaw]

I still remember when I realised I had a haemorrhoid and the first thing I thought of was kyle’s haemorrhoid/god speech 😭

[@DisfunktionalTV]

Lmaooo

[@Official_RetroMania]

This is easily a S Tier episode! Easily in my top 20 I love this episode!

[@whateverrittakes]

Agree, Cartman as his best 🔥

[@Archphoenix1]

oh no, hemorrhoids are no joke. one time i popped one and nearly blacked out on the toilet. it can be real insane

[@stavjfhssf7054]

This is what I love about this episode, whether religious or not, this happens in a lot in life where some things you perceive as good may just do as much harm as you could imagine. Many people lose faith in God or elsewhere when they don't get their prayers or wishes granted when they don't realize what is better for them or awaits for them. There is a lot of reasons for this. Sometimes good things happen to bad people maybe so they can reform themselves. Sometimes it happens to show people that this world is not a perfect world where can just expect to get what we demand where good leads to good and bad to bad despite the general trend. Sometimes bad things have to happen for good things to happen. Cartman could have done special things with that money but instead spent it on the park with which he used to brag to everyone and he thought that the park was everything and would satisfy him in everything but due to his arrogance, hatred, etc he didn't realize that perhaps that park wasn't really something meant for him which is what Kyle learns in the end leading to him restoring his faith in God. Sometimes what we like is what we should get because it could do more harm than expected. Some bad things might be blessings in disguise.

[@sc1338]

Or it’s just a convenient way to excuse why this happens. religion is a sham

[@inkchariot6147]

Imagine the God that you worship betraying your faith by betting with Satan and fucking up not only your life, but the life of everyone associated with you.

[@mar420.74]

​@@sc1338 oh stop talking im not even religious and i WHOLE heartedly agreed with this comment this is how life is, your the one mucking about dude, that's just fact, they didn't even push religion at all when talking and i hate it when people do that because it's not necessary.

[@sc1338]

@@mar420.74 womp womp, just pointing out reality

[@boogabuga7657]

this episode has some of Matt Stone's best voice work for Kyle

[@computernerd1101]

God didn't give Cartman a million dollars. Cartman's grandma gave him a million dollars.

[@GreatMewtwo]

The promo for this episode was one of my favorites. "Cartman gets one million dollars! And Cartman blows one million dollars!"

[@sermicha5324]

Always loved early season Cartman and Kyle’s dynamic lol. It’s what happens when haters clash In my opinion, early season Kyle was more of an asshole than Cartman most of the time, and they slowly but surely pushed Cartman’s “evil manipulator” and Kyle’s “good boy who gives speeches” personalities to the extreme. it’s interesting to see how the characters are written between then and now

[@Aiveq]

its cuz of polit correctness... you cant have presumably good character making bad takes and Cartman is a scapegoat. whenever Cartman absent from his role then someone has drastic change in personality to fill in ex. Butters in Wieners out and Wendy in Hobbit

[@jasonvoorheescampblood]

@@Aiveq watch South Park more and you realize they don't give a damn about political correctness

[@conservativewarrior777]

I love how Cartman never realized it costs money to own, run and operate a theme park even if it's not open to the public?

[@GreatMewtwo]

I also love how Cartman is transparent about the attendance limits, breaking down the expenses to justify the ticket prices.

[@BardicProductions]

I know ya like Butters, the best Butters episode to me is titled Going Native, trust me it’s hilarious to see Butters be so Savage in it.

[@jasonvoorheescampblood]

Great episode. But I'm shocked at the security guard not being interested in rides myself. I'm adult too and still love rollercoasters 😅

[@DisfunktionalTV]

Haha he gotta pay bills man

[@jasonvoorheescampblood]

@@DisfunktionalTV true. Stupid taxes

[@TnT_F0X]

This episode is from 2001. so 60 dollars in 2001, assuming you invested all 60 dollars into pokemon cards, would be worth over 30,000 dollars today!

[@DisfunktionalTV]

Good times! All i needed was a Charizard to have the original 150 lol

[@TnT_F0X]

@@DisfunktionalTV My brain still cant handle the fact that those 20 dollar booster boxes at Toys R Us are now 10k unopened. Than again it's not as crazy as the pizza guy who was paid in bitcoin worth 1.4 billion now.

[@historyking9984]

Cartland exclusivity and increasing it slowly made it more exclusive. And even as he added a few more people more and more wanted to be those few people who got in

[@SnowyWolborg]

There are simply some places that will feel unnatural and creepy if they are empty. If you are ever the lone person in a library, school, mall, or amusement park, then, you're probably about to get killed.

[@darkzer0670]

Or that means I'm robbing the place.

[@JohnSmith-zw8vp]

To have shorter lines...go on a weekday (especially if school is back in session) and most definitely NOT on the Big Three (Memorial Day, Fourth of July, Labor Day).

[@KenseiSanjian]

I glad you're watching complete episodes instead of compilations. You get more context. Also, why are you not on tv all the time? You have a fantastic personality that is outgoing and at least for me, not annoying. Keep being you and never be reluctant to try different things.

[@bicboyjoy]

$60 a day in 2001 would be like $100 now. For a security job for a big amusement park? Hell naw you're gonna have to give me like $200 a day

[@SeyaDiakite7]

Yay. Your South Park reactions are just so relaxing for some reason cause I laugh synch with you to episodes I already saw. Mad respect bro. Ps. You’re adorable with that beanie on XD

[@chaosspear0195]

You know being the owner Cartman could have just given himself privileges to be first in any line or give it back to Fun under a legal contract that granted him the privilege of cutting first in line on anything in the park but there be no resolution to the plot if so. While Kyle was definitely being a hater so is Cartman and Kyle is a good kid while Cartman isa Demon brat I always love seeing him end miserable at the end of an episode cause he got the karma he deserves.

[@aprilgallimore9636]

One of my favorites! Kyle literally gets butthurt lol

[@MTTT19]

18:30 That's me at Christmas when I'm trying to work but there are too many people shopping.

[@Raven5150]

Imagine that freefall ride cutting of a foot on the way down, that happend at Kentucky kingdom's superman ride, a cable broke on the way down wrapped around a woman's foot and cut it off

[@noooo_safechat2589]

Doctor Mike reacted to 11:36, which was included in a compilation, and said that it’ll only take from a couple of weeks up until a month until Kyle can go on any rollercoaster rides and whatnot. And no, haemorrhoids don’t spread the the lungs; that can depend on where the Internal Haemorrhoid is located. In Kyle’s case, his is an External Haemorrhoid which does not spread to the lungs or anything inside of the human body.

[@_WeDontKnow_]

it's so funny how Kenny gets a pole through the face, and then everyone's focus is still on Kyle for actually dying the first time lmfao

[@Ohiostatefan221985]

Not sure if you have reacted to it or not yet, but the episode titled Make Love, Not Warcraft is a solid episode. Even if you don't understand anything about World of Warcraft, it is still enjoyable. Glad your watching this episode as well, all of season five episodes are some of the best of the series

[@CyrusShameliOfficial]

Cartmanland is crazy good

[@tastygravy6880]

I must say, both Cartman and Kyle deserved what they got, Kyle always wants Cartman to be miserable and can't stand the thought of him being successful and Cartman is a selfish person at heart.

[@roderickmoore2003]

I'm from Alabama, and we're not starving That's Mississippi

[@MusicalSavior23]

"Merry Christmas, Charlie Manson" if you wanna meet the Cartman family.

[@pariahazul8653]

The Grinch reference at 5:03 😂

[@BLopez-eg5kh]

Your reactions are hilarious man! You deserve more subscribers tbh

[@stavjfhssf7054]

Bro its not cancer, its a hemorrhoid 😂😂😂

[@stavjfhssf7054]

LINES LINES LINES!!😂😂 BRO I HATE THOSE TOO

[@fieryphoenix586]

Don't think I've read The Book of Job enough, but I'm pretty sure by the end of the story, God gave everything back to Job.

[@crovax1375]

Merry Christmas, Charlie Manson! (S2 E16) shows the most of Cartman's extended family

[@Songfugel]

Hemorrhoids themselves can't ofc spread anywhere, but an infection from them can indeed spread anywhere and be lethal

[@FimbongBass]

I believe “Free Hat” is an episode focused on cartmens family, doesnt really mention anything about the crack problem but its still hilarious 😂

[@christopherb501]

No, it isn't. It's worth watching, but it's not related to them. You're thinking of...I think, "Merry Christmas, Charlie Manson"?

[@Motownsports89]

Not at all

[@Laxhoop]

All Cartman had to do was make a rule that he got quick access to whatever, whenever.

[@CheerfullyCynical829]

Cartman doesn't just hate lines, he hates loud crowds of people and screaming kids. I would too.

[@alanze18]

i think matt and trey were drunk when they did this episode, why Kyle A Jew was in church, also why his parents "jews" reading him a bible, a book that they don't believe in.

[@formdusktilldeath]

Main lesson: don’t fuck with the IRS

[@lornajean27]

There is an episode you haven't reacted to yet where we see Cartman's extended family. It's Season 2 Episode 16 called "Merry Christmas Charlie Manson!"

[@Raven5150]

Cartman had a sister in the pilot but she never came back

[@Joao-wr7xg]

Its like a balance, If Kyle is happy then Cartman side gets sadder,If Cartman happy then Kyle is sadder

[@DisfunktionalTV]

Facts

[@bemasaberwyn55]

Cartman being miserable ensures world peace

[@Kat-PM]

@@bemasaberwyn55 nah, it makes him become a super villain 😂

[@anthonymcrooster3703]

Actually - that Cartman's accidental business model is a real thing. By limiting people's access to said thing you spark even those people's interest who weren't interested in the first place. Some kids start to drink and smoke only because their parents were very strict with denying their kids any contact with smokes and alcohol. Another good example is diamonds. There's actually a f***ton of them and outside of professional instruments they're worthless, but the artificial scarcity and a high price-tag turned the otherwise useless overpriced jewellery made of compressed carbon pieces into a coveted status symbol. ''Now you want it because we made it almost impossible to have it,'' is the Holy Grail of marketing, one above even the ''Limited Time Only.'' By denying people a seemingly decent product you spark their rebellious, egotistical inner spirit that doesn't accept a ''No'' for an answer. Turns a simple purchase into a quest, which at the end makes it feel that much more rewarding.

[@tajemniczepulchnecos2074]

10:30 wait... 60 dollars a day is CHEAP?

[@toddjones1480]

To cover payroll for a security guard? YES.

[@deadpoolsally6837]

Let four people in a park each day.

[@eternalmasterjaeger]

You got to watch Season 16 Episode 10 "Insecurity" The story concerns Kyle's belief that his mother is having an affair with a UPS delivery man.

[@Cifer77]

$60 a day is equivalent to $7.50 per hour at 40 hours per week..... That's $0.25 OVER the US federal minimum wage.... lol (edit: and that's not even taking out taxes and SS)

[@staciehill3301]

As someone who had to have emergency surgery due to hemorrhoids they can be no joke (Went to a Dr. and 12 hours later I was under for surgery). For me mine became abscessed. Basically, hemmorhoids can occur due to strain, lack of fiber, having smaller vessels in that area etc... While the rides for a year is exaggeration it is not a pleasant surgery and having one definitely can affect your life if you don't get them taken care of.

[@LeesReviews69]

The beanie and white shirt has me trippin out 😂

[@RustinChole]

The lack of a “KZbin WHATS UP” threw me🤷🏻‍♂️

[@MikeDoyleRealMan44]

18:30 Somebody in front of you has a full cart of groceries and you have a candy bar and a gift card

[@subjectdelta7210]

the dumb thing is that the fence worked. he didn’t need to buy a guard.

[@Floyd13778]

"Gosh, she didn't take this long to die!" 🤣🤣🤣🤣 He's such a prick.

[@minttulatte]

I adore this episode. It's so funny😂

[@ProgazQQ]

I'm sure any infection caused by a wound can get really bad, no matter if it was originally a hemoroid.

[@aaronm12500]

No Yankee fitted today?? Jk, but damn this was a funny ass episode. The hemorrhoids spreading to his lung was an absolutely ridiculous line lmao. Look forward to all of your South Park reactions, I’ve seen them all 👌🏽🔥

[@christopherb501]

Kenny Dies --> Ladder to Heaven --> Return of the Fellowship of the Two Towers (something along those lines) --> Biggest Douche in the Universe

[@medic_memer]

5:48 yes, but mainly due to stress and wiping, for example, when you shit alot via magnesium citrate, that’s leads to wiping, and wiping causes friction and stress, and then Hemorrhoids

[@Arko1112]

cartman should have just rented it for a week

[@t0t4llyR3nnzz]

Not kyle paying 30 robux and pressing revive button

[@CJ69_69]

Yes, infants and kids can get hemorrhoids but it is very rare

[@angief6364]

In fact, this is one of the first times we see the usual cosmic joke, Universe laws, cosmic balance, etc, whatever name we can call it: if Cartman gets something that can make him happy, Kyle suffers and becomes a victim of his schemes (even if Cartman doesn't try); but if everything gets right and Cartman gets his comuppance and suffers; Kyle gets happy and recovers his inner peace. Or in short: If Cartman wins, Kyle fails; if Cartman fails, Kyle wins. Check the Passion of the Jew, Ginger Cow, the Little Tourrette, Tonsil Trouble, Le Petit Tourette. But I think you have more the idea if you have watched Imagination Land and Cartoon Wars.

[@Eric.cartman7]

Sadness is ive been working my ass for like 5 years still cannot make 60$ a day😢😢

[@justarandomfurry09]

This episode was made in 2001

[@TheShadowassassin27]

Pride goeth before destruction,& a haughty spirit before fall. -Proverbs 16:18 Cartman felt that he was on top of the world & the fact that he had the nerve to tease & taunt everyone especially his friends Stan & Kyle he deserved to fall the way he did in this episode.

[@1fulsniperlegend]

God rewarded Job ten times over

[@Forrest1989]

Giving him a new family isn't what I would call 10x over. You can't just replace loved ones like they're a change of clothes.

[@pinkgazelle3445]

The line I think god has plenty of money still cracks me up to this day lol.

[@TheDavi2001]

I'm getting futurama starved, I NEED MORE FUTURAMA

[@UpintheAir1395]

Lol I don't think Kyle is a hater. Cartman usually deserves whats coming to him

[@k-trashradio5163]

I love how it never dawns on cartman to declare himself a vip and give himself some kinda first in line privileges 😅

[@patrickjoseph2822]

8:40 so you telling me they could of just gone through the entrance 😂😂

[@zodiac9326]

Cartman saying yes yes on the merry-go-round was giving cassie from euphoria vibes

[@strifewins6792]

They are miserable, after an injury I got in Afghanistan I was put on pain killers for a little over 3 years and then abruptly taken off them and it caused me to develop one. All I will say about it is YOU WILL NEVER FEEL GOOD TAKING A DUMP AGAIN.

[@PrimeStudios]

Wait till you see what God looks like.

[@GSBarren]

in this episode i think they are treating hemorrhoids like its cancer

[@hiddendesire3076]

5:53 I mean, I had one since I was young. Been dealing with the bleeding issue every other month or so for over a decade. Can’t eat popcorn because of it.

[@WirrWicht]

Every time someone escaped the clutches of the madness called religion, it is a good time.

[@meganh2637]

what's pretty funny is that if you watch KZbin Legal Eagle, he broke down during Charlie and the Chocolate Factory that most American laws work that when you sell the business any pending business affairs - i.e. legal matters, tax matters, all that jazz - goes to the new owners to settle, NOT the previous ones! hahahaha they straight up jacked his cash for no reason!! XD XD XD

[@GhostKyng]

19:21 my question is what did Kenny’s family did with the other 500k that was given to them?

[@CheerfullyCynical829]

Blew it all on meth and crack. And funerals.

[@barrypeirson3710]

The story of Job. Kyles reaction to it is on point...God makes his faithful suffer just to prove a point to satan. Terrible!

[@GreatMewtwo]

What they fail to mention is that Job is blessed by God to restore his status and then some.

[@dolan_plz]

The whole Bible is such a low grade garbage, filled with myths and contradictions, horrible stories about man's interpretation of a deity made up in his own image. It's amazing so many people don't see that.

[@desthissues3885]

I’m still waiting for that South Park Black Friday trilogy.

[@LightUpDaBomb1]

He made a commercial to let people know they couldn't come to the park. Lmaooooooo

[@ayaka_tyan]

I highly recommend watching the episodes: S17: Ep 7, 8, 9.

[@VictorLaszlo46]

While I am not a doctor, I have had more than my share of hemorrhoids. Yes, kids can get them; I had them; they're usually caused by a combination of things if you do not have a high-fiber diet, you will have to push a lot harder when you drop the kids off at the pool, and for longer stents, that puts strains on the veins in your butthole. I don't know about the amusement park thing, but there are rings you can buy to sit on to relieve the pain.

[@LudwigXVII.]

You should watch Stanley's Cup! One of my favorites , would love to see your reaction!

[@steakismeat177]

I know. They often write these kids as young adults and the babies as the kids.