ASMR | Vaguely Bitchy Gold-Digger Blind Date

[@brittanyish]

"I'm not 43, I'm 29...with shipping and handling" 😂😂😂

[@Mayrita77]

Brittany Pattee LOL

[@chrislevy9265]

Hey. Brittany

[@angiemaree1038]

LOL! This was hilarious! 😂😂😂 Side note to anybody who's curious, Domaine Ramonet Montrachet Grand Cru costs like $1,250 a bottle. I only know that cause I heard it on a Real Housewives episode once (a very fitting resource for this video 😂)

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

I got the food/wine ideas by Googling "expensive wine" and "expensive dinner choices."

[@teflonmagnet]

Angie Maree more like 7k a bottle for Domaine de la Romanee-Conti Montrachet Grand Cru (give or take a K).

[@becominghero9754]

Oh no my poor imaginary wallet!!!

[@Mayrita77]

They say the attitude a date has with a waiter in a restaurant can tell you a lot about how they will treat you later

[@phoodles_]

Elizabeth Its accurate

[@cincorolo8488]

she ain't a gold digger, she's a "sparkly friend".

[@Mirandanns]

Please please please make her dating adventures a regular role play! I feel like she is sooo wise and we have SO much more to learn from her!

[@katiehayden4981]

Miranda Ann yessssss

[@ultravioletgal8273]

bellissima 1202 because everyone's basic af

[@becominghero9754]

Wise? This was a parody comedy video about a bitchy woman who steals money from dudes on dates by manipulating them into expensive things that no one should eat while people are still starving...and then runs away when she finds out you're too poor. I'm a little worried someone thinks this is wise... It's supposed to be a joke!

[@citlalivillegas9298]

Lol she couldn't name it " bitchy date " she named it " vaguely bitchy gold digger blind date " me trying to make it into that 1000 word count on my essay 😂😂😂

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

I got the feeling that she wasn't TOTALLY bitchy. Bitchy Lite, possibly, but not full-on bitchy.

[@citlalivillegas9298]

SouthernASMR Sounds 😂yeah bitchy but not bitchy LOLOL

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

Oh, she could've been a lot worse. I dialed the bitch-o-meter back quite a bit for her.

[@russodd]

Oh my goodness this was comedy gold! I'd love to see more of this character. Maybe one where she's gotten another bank teller job, and she's hitting on a customer when she sees the size of his account while struggling to type, handle money, etc. with those fingernails?

[@CallMeAkane]

russodd that's a good one!

[@evildeerghost]

maybe one where she robs the bank

[@maryc2501]

Yes thats a good one lol. Love her skits.

[@Ginagigi1986]

I'm like cringing for this guy... lol

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

I was, too! :)

[@sabrinat7414]

"29 with shipping and handling " XD wow!!!! That killed me!

[@user-gx3qo5oo8c]

Sabrina T SAME 😭 i started dyingggg 😂

[@YazzyNikole]

Sabrina T me too!! 😂😂 very clever!! Haha

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

In real life, I'm not the least bit ashamed of my age. This woman's too vain to ever admit she's anything over 29.

[@emmuhlu]

@@SouthernASMRSounds good for you ❤️

[@Mirandanns]

You should do a Real Housewives role play! You'd be amazing, as always!

[@WhisperTonic]

Miranda Ann YES!!!!

[@Mirandanns]

I'm so happy I am not the only one! I think it would be so entertaining if she did an 'audition tape' for Real Housewives or gossip or anything related to RH, to be honest haha. She is so talented that I am sure that she could put her signature spin on it.

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

I've never seen that show. The title has always bugged me. "Real" Housewives? Seriously? I've never seen a real housewife who lived or acted the way they do. With that being said, I'd LOVE a chance to play that role. I don't know that I could keep a straight face, though.

[@Mirandanns]

That is why you would be so great at it, you kill every role you take on! They are beyond ridiculous. They all look hungry and constipated at the same time. Anyway, something to think about!

[@devonu.k3976]

Oh my gosh yes , that would be so good ! that show is too funny :)

[@FantasyASMR]

This is the best thing I've seen all day. Only problem is, I'm too amused to fall asleep :) x

[@citlalivillegas9298]

FantasyASMR I FEEL THATTT lololol

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

I'm sorry! I hope to make at least two more of these. I hope you like them!

[@WhisperAudiosASMR]

guuuuurrrrrllll! :D

[@FantasyASMR]

I have absolutely no doubt about that ;)

[@asmrcookielady1535]

I totally agree. I LOVE all of her videos, but I dont watch them to fall asleep, I watch them because they are insanely entertaining as well as SUPER relaxing!

[@vene_unsweetened]

"Oh, it's your uncle's membership." 😂😂😂

[@Starasmr2323]

Lol the nails were hilarious great acting great video

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

Thank you! I have to say, though, I couldn't WAIT to take those nails OFF! I couldn't do anything with them on. My son had to put my earrings on me! I couldn't do it! I don't know how people with ridiculously long nails get anything done.

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

Francis Marcel Vos No thanks. I'm way too busy for that nonsense. I can't type 95 words per minute with freaking talons on the ends of my fingers. And that's just one of a thousand things that I have to be able to do quickly and efficiently every day. So nah.

[@FinalFirebrand]

This response is why you're one of my favorites. [lol]

[@TrainTransportShortsOfficial]

Francis Marcel Vos your brain can't just adjust if they get stuck in your food and scratch you and bump into things. Yes you get used to it but not in a comfortable way like walking or tying shoe laces 🙄it's more like trying to walk in high heels- uncomfortable and unnecessary. And I don't see why they are "sensual" they r literally just long and scratchy.

[@TimoHannemann]

I watched this video, and as a result, I became aware of your wonderful channel due to the wonderful symbiosis, your very feminine elegantly packaged long fingernails, in (causality) paradise of authentic harmony of your heart-loving kindness, and found your very extensive Video-Liste, similarly appealing beautiful contributions from you, in which you also wear such glamorous long feminine fingernails ... And now that I find in this context, with shockingly shocking indignation that you these wonderful long fingernails, even at all not as beautiful And positive, but as unpleasant and negative at the present is sensitive ... !!!! ?? !!! I... i... i... think, i must Cry, but I tell you the truth, please dont ask me Why, no matter what, I could't say good bye... 😢😭

[@ASMRArtofSound]

Couldn't take my eyes away from your nails! 😂👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

They're hypnotic, aren't they? I kept waving them around and doing swoopy motions with my hands the entire time I had them on. I drove my kids crazy! They said I looked like a witch!

[@thatveganfatkid6882]

you should do a second date at the country club

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

Thanks for the idea! I think I will! I have a few ideas for that.

[@whocares6173]

when you said the wine was expensive, I thought would be $1-200, but when I found out it was around $1,250 I almost screamed! AND $500 STEAK OMG

[@mysticbinch]

Why aren't you a famous actress yet??

[@itsmorfine]

You're honestly one of my favourite ASMRtists ever! Your content is always so funny and original and your accent is the cherry on top 👌🏻 Thankyou for creating such amazing videos ❤️

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

Thank you! I'm so glad you like my stuff!

[@CaliFuego]

Lmao the first thing I noticed was the nails! OMG that's gold. Nice touch.

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

The nails were a real adventure. I'd never tried press-on fake nails before I made this video last night. I couldn't do ANYTHING with those things on my fingers. UGH! I couldn't wait to take them off!

[@CaliFuego]

SouthernASMR Sounds hahaha! That makes it more funny! Just think there are tons of people who CAN function with those claws. I don't know how they do it. Kudos to you for rocking them, though!

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

I don't know how they can stand it. I almost gouged my eye out trying to put my wig on!

[@keepingupwiththesisterss]

SouthernASMR Sounds that's a wig???? it fits you so well!!!!

[@abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxya9604]

SouthernASMR Sounds I cackled when she rudely called the waiter over and told him "he's not ready to order"

[@gortimustidditus]

This was SO funny- I burst out laughing when she brought the waiter over to tell them they weren't ready to order yet xD

[@grey9593]

Blimington Bear I started screaming 😂

[@jenie717]

Thank you so much for making us videos as often as you do. They're always amazing!

[@that_one_av57]

" Excuse me! Come here, cmon. Oh goodness they are so slow... Ah yes he isnt ready to order yet. Yeah. Thanks. Bye bye. " Im dead

[@lisaa5026]

I know it's a wig, but this shade of warm blonde/light brown and this length look really great on you! Love, love, love!

[@WhispersInBloom]

"In my spare time I've been growing out my fingernails"...you are just too much! haha :) Absolutely fabulous role play, as always!!

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

Thank you! I messed up several times, but hopefully the next one will be better.

[@vm88940]

I want Lynette to have a back story on this woman. like she came to do her hair or nails or something and tell us about her!!!

[@jessica3497]

This is fantastic. I'm always torn between wanting to pass out and wanting to keep watching to see what hilarious things you'll say next!

[@XxHungerGames12xX]

Tried to fall asleep but this was too hilarious to not watch 😂

[@citlalivillegas9298]

shucked ikr ! It was like 12 am and I was trying to sleep but this was too good and funny to keep sleeping

[@salamanderss7536]

You look so pretty. You should make this character into a series, I would love to see her return!

[@anon-ib8kp]

"Cheers to you finally making it" lmao you kill me you're a great actor. I think you can get into like a movie or something. Thank you so much for making this video it's AMAZING.

[@Ozi_mkm]

"No your other left sweetie" 😂 You're super talented!

[@anthonykulik8692]

Gold diggers never looked so beautiful

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

Ahem! Excuse me! I am NOT a gold digger! I made that abundantly clear. I HATE shallow people who only care about net worth and superficial stuff. (Grabs your wallet)

[@anthonykulik8692]

SouthernASMR Sounds 😂 your cute and funny 😂

[@anthonykulik8692]

SouthernASMR Sounds I love the name of the restaurant on the menu lol

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

Thanks! I couldn't think of anything especially clever, so I stuck with my "This is a ________" theme.

[@anthonykulik8692]

SouthernASMR Sounds well whatever the case you are doing a spectacular job you should be very proud of yourself keep up the great content I only follow the best

[@norlavine]

We all know this female character, and you portrayed her perfectly! Thank you so much for sharing your great sense of humor and creativity with us xx

[@jessejones7701]

That Wig your wearing really suits you, I mean you're beautiful anyway. but It really looks great on you and you're an amazing actress. I truly consider your ASMR vids among the best I've seen in my 3 years since 1st being exposed to ASMR:)

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

Thank you so much!!! :)

[@aprilsinkowski6776]

Mary you are just gorgeous. these wigs are so flattering on you. lol. love the nails too. killing it.

[@jac544]

I've been tentatively exploring your channel and I have to say I love it and your intro to the sanctimommy interview made me think that you are one of the warmest and most genuine people on KZbin. I love your work!!

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

Jacqueline Tingle Thank you so much!

[@SouthernBelleWhisper]

Can you PLLEEEAASSSE make another blind date golddigger video? This is one of my FAVORITE VIDEOS EVER!!

[@shannontatone8920]

Sometimes I don't even watch your videos for ASMR...I watch them because you make me laugh and they're incredibly entertaining.

[@HeyGuysItsDeath]

This and the "social climber at a fancy party" roleplay are some of my favorites from you 💛 more shallow pseudo-bitches please :)

[@rubyskeleton5287]

"Is money a problem?" *slowly closes menu

[@britty44fan98]

If I was your date, “Is money a promblem?” I would get scared! Lol ❤️

[@vm88940]

I love it so far! oh my gosh. have her return like Lynette! I am in a love/hate relationship with this!

[@mangopayaso]

please make more of this !! I really love these characters, like the social climber in one of your other vids. But preferably the next one would be more gender neutral :,,) if that's cool ? // also you look very cute !! I enjoy how your eyeshadow matches your nails

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

Aw, thanks! I hope to make at least two more videos with this character. I have some ideas for her. As soon as I saw that wig, I immediately thought "Uh huh. Gold digger. Definitely."

[@sandramarten3802]

The nails! The Hair! The Menu! We won't talk about money! Hello, Mr....Person.... He will eat it! Just bring it over, with a side order of a couple of gold bars.... xxx She is a great character. Well Done Mary. 29 with shipping and handling! Classic! My dream? To be counting my own vast piles of cash! Her favourite tune......"Money"$$$

[@thequeenoflc7846]

"yours hasn't exploded yet....that's wonderful..." 😂😂😂😂😂lmfao

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

LOL...I don't even know what sort of vehicle she was talking about. :)

[@KadenKurves]

I legit heard it as I read it lmao

[@OmgitsNeens]

This was so hilarious and unique! ASMR videos have been lacking on creativity lately so your videos are really refreshing!

[@katiehayden4981]

I thought your channel would be bad but holy moly it's AMZING!! I LOVE YOUR CHANNEL! Never had more tingles watching anyone else!!❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@SouthernBelleWhisper]

"we almost had to wait." made me think of Goldie Hawn in the movie Overboard. you are so amusing! plus realaxing. I adore your bitchy role plays and I have to admit this is one of your best.

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

Yep! That's where that line came from! I LOVE that silly little movie!

[@SouthernBelleWhisper]

SouthernASMR Sounds your next role play should have cavair. and you should be like "caviar should be round and hard and of adequate size and it should burst in your mouth at precisely the last moment." XD. omg omg omg. you should do a joanna/annie Staten role play! I would LOVE that and you would be perfect for it. that is one of my favorite movies

[@Fortheloveofagypsy]

SouthernASMR Sounds I love that movie. A Goldie Hawn role play is a good idea. Btw the remake is so awful awful awful.

[@narwhalsrock1220]

This video was very funny and relaxing. I'd LOVE a whole video on just pressing and crinkling of whatever kind of paper the menu was on. That immediately gave me ASMR every time.

[@SouthernBelleWhisper]

Please do another blind date video. This is one of my favorites of yours.

[@luckylove083]

"I'm 29 with shipping and handling." 😂😂😂

[@shinyteethandme]

Can you do another of the Social Climber videos? I loved that one so much.

[@rb4184]

Legend has it, she never came back....

[@OliviaPlunkett]

A blind date is such a good ASMR roleplay idea!!

[@amie2732]

Again, amazing. Usually I can put my phone down and just listen to ASMR videos especially if I'm at work, but oh my gosh, I can't take my eyes off your videos because they are so entertaining! Ha!

[@meredithgrimm6635]

You are hilarious 😂 my new fav ASMR account, I love your content!

[@seras000]

What if we said we forgot our wallet at the end? 😂😂

[@katieh8186]

I'm from Brevard NC and your accent is so perfect for my hometown. You are so amazing lmao never stop making videos

[@luvmewillu]

😂😂😂😂 her friend/enemie got her good. He used a coupon at a fancy restaurant😂😂😂😂 this was hilarious to watch. U have a new subscriber🙌😍😍😍 great job with an awesome roleplay

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

Thank you!

[@laraakdol7267]

this is hilarious

[@Miss_Wonderful1]

"I'm a mercenary... very gracious, charitable..." 🤣🤣🤣 I'm wondering how Mary isn't an acclaimed actress. She's better than any comedians I've seen all my life

[@annamacra581]

OMG the mercenary part killed me 😂 their loyalty is bought 😂👌🏻

[@rasaan2011]

Can't say this enough... you're an amazing actress, & I look forward to all of your videos!!!😸❤😸

[@canofmonster3308]

😍😍😍😍😍 I had to subscribe your acting is unbelievable and your voice is beautiful 😭♥️

[@RayBanCanada]

"This is a _______" gets funnier every time. Love your videos ❤

[@anablablabla]

this seems to be my new favourite asmr video since i've watched it at least 10 times in 2 days and i don't even like soft spoken videos?! :D

[@TargaryenSoul]

That menu suspiciously looks like an envelope folded in two but it can't be it cause it's a fancy restaurant! Awesome video as always, keep up the good work :D

[@DominiqueFox9821]

Loved it! love the look!! beautiful colors 😄

[@taylormarks4894]

this is my favorite asmr video and I've been watching them for 4 years. 💖

[@Sean360Lennox]

I feel like I just went on a date lmaoo but I love your character here.. Haha awesome video. Makes me have some ideas for my channel.. Ur amazing.

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

Thank you! I really enjoyed this character. I think there's a lot of potential there.

[@Sean360Lennox]

SouthernASMR Sounds Oh yes lots!!! Blind date series.. Or something close to that! That last part was classic

[@amberhernandez1981]

SouthernASMR Sounds Love this woman!

[@annamuse1332]

this is amazing. Wonderful woman! So kind and laid back, down to earth. A real...peach.

[@MrSbygneus]

Superb acting! I had a good time watching this, thank you!

[@rosesolis9047]

Love your nails everytime!!

[@SuzyBenz]

You're funny and relaxing at the same time! Lol

[@lotusfae]

You are hilarious! When you waved the waiter/waitress over to say he wasn't ready yet, I lost it.

[@fuglyslut3894]

I'm living for those nails matching the eyeshadow

[@lilianapapp6731]

You are a very talented actress!! Really natural acting! This is so funny 😂👌

[@iimaddiecoreyoutxbe9208]

Me: watches video Me: checks out channel profile picture Also me: IS THIS THE WOMAN FROM WHEN SHE WAS IN THE STORE CANDY SECTION?

[@ellieclayton3217]

Your I ideas are so unique, I love your videos so much 💕✨I was laughing the whole way through 😂❤️

[@WhisperAudiosASMR]

OMG those nails! :D x

[@WhisperAudiosASMR]

"This is a fancy restaurant" menu - Im dying! x

[@TheLeavesofdeath]

I love this character! please make her a regular to your channel.

[@JeffersonAlleyway]

Omg more of the long nails the hand gestures with those were perfect!

[@vm88940]

a "vette" a chevette lol who else thought she meant a corvette haha 😂😂😂😂

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

I had a friend in high school who had a Chevette. He referred to it as his 'vette to make people think it was a Corvette. Good times!

[@valeriepaigeee]

She really killed this! Great job

[@musicfreaakx3o]

I want a sequel to this where this character gets rejected in the end by the wealthy man she is trying to date!

[@TrainTransportShortsOfficial]

shelby thomas that wouldn't be fun we r talking about a smart woman who catches these dumb millionaire men

[@tess9755]

If I was her date my emotions would be all over the place. Anxious, offended, near to panic attack but weirdly relaxed

[@meredithgrimm6635]

Im 29 with shipping and handling 😂😂😂

[@domenicavallone28]

Amazing, and well executed! love this video and you are super talented!!

[@_o_0]

CALLS THE WAITER OVER JUST TO TELL THEM THEY AREN'T READY TO ORDER, BITCH I'M ROLLING THIS IS SO FUNNY

[@SKINxChina]

lmao i love how you do all the gold digger roleplays in blue eyeshadow! its perfect! haha!

[@emogal365]

Oh man, I would jump out the bathroom window from a date like this, leave her with the bill!

[@tammyjukes1408]

I would of gone to the restroom and left her there lol 👍😘🇬🇧❤️😊

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

LOL, me too!

[@kokyma]

I love to learn English from your vlog, you speaking so clearly

[@ameils24]

Lovely! Love those extravagant nails!. Part 2? (:

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

I'll definitely make a Part 2, and maybe a third one as well.

[@chelseygerber1917]

When she said "woooow" all i could think of was the Owen Wilson saying wow because she sounded exactly like him

[@annalisepaige528]

"Oh it's your uncles membership? That's too bad" hahahaha

[@glowingasmr9324]

lmao!! :D A Real Housewives role play would be awesome...I would say Beverly Hills!! LOL I love the nails and wig, you definitely nailed it with the gold digger role play...thank you for the morning laugh .... and let me tell you, those nails look awesome on you ♥♥

[@SouthernASMRSounds]

I thought about doing a "Let me teach you how to be a gold digger" roleplay with this woman. Like maybe she's doing some on-the-job training with another gold-digger wannabe at a party or something.

[@glowingasmr9324]

YES!!! do it, I would love to see that!! :D

[@elchasai]

I can very definitively say I would not be asking this missus out again. ty for this, it is hilarious.

[@melissastorn]

The nails!!! 💅🏻💅🏻💅🏻🔥🔥🔥 Fearsome & fierce

[@jelissalewis]

THIS IS ONE OF THE STUDENTS OF THAT GOLD DIGGER ROLEPLAYHDSBFF

[@cardiacmyxoma4073]

Brilliant! Absolutely brilliant!!

[@calinmarie5974]

That menu XDDDD And, you look so elegant and certain about it, it's so funny! XDD

[@kefla231]

Calin Marie Aww, thank you!