Spiritual Guidance E05: Dating

[@Theohybrid]

Very sound advice. Thank you. When Christ is in your center, your desires, motives, and intentions are refined. You aren't motivated by lust but by mere compatibility. Lust can blind you and make unacceptable things acceptable solely because of attraction. Infatuation can set you up for false expectation once it fades. Committment can be built. Arranged Marriages tend to last longer than Love Marriages. Similar to dating young, people find this out as they go along while they themselves are changing into being more mature in the relationship. Relationships can be experimental in friendships. Once passions erupts, it takes everything with it. Passion is not bad but a tool to drive you closer. The Christian goal is self denial while attributing love to those around you while being personally holy. In relationships, it is to show God's relationship with mankind.

[@Theohybrid]

God selflessly gave himself and drew man to come to Him and willingly give themselves selflessly to Him. The same can happen for marriage.

[@Theohybrid]

"The Truth About Love", by Pat Love, really helped me understand good info on relationships.

[@joshua_wherley]

Thank you, Abouna. This was very helpful!

[@cycnow]

Thanks Joshua for your comment. Keep watching CYC!

[@forrestwalker8729]

i know im randomly asking but does someone know a way to get back into an Instagram account?? I was stupid forgot my account password. I love any tips you can give me

[@marcelsincere9933]

@Forrest Walker Instablaster :)

[@forrestwalker8729]

@Marcel Sincere i really appreciate your reply. I got to the site on google and I'm in the hacking process atm. Takes quite some time so I will reply here later with my results.

[@forrestwalker8729]

@Marcel Sincere It worked and I actually got access to my account again. I am so happy:D Thank you so much, you saved my ass!

[@jacquelinehenry6447]

Thank you abouna!

[@emebrhaney4798]

Very interesting topic GBU abuna

[@Michaelsaylor-u5w]

ABona. I was actually raised in Egypt in the countryside and they were always telling us that dating is some bad and a sin and i thought for many years that it's from Christianity and the Coptic church but what i can hear from you that it doesn't matter if it is a real love relationship so for example if my daughter wants to date a doy that she loves and iam sure that she is mature enough should i commit my thoughts which that is bad or not

[@Theohybrid]

It really depends. Its good you vet, see the character of your daughter's boyfriend as a more mature male. Dating is not a sin but it has proven itself to not be foolproof. Today, it has only gotten worse. However, smart, intentional, thoughtful, sensible dating can work. Dating, seeing reasonable qualities, a trajectory of responsibility, decent hygiene, a good attitude, speaks a good love language, practices Christian virtues, is financially responsible, and is mentally sound are good signs. Is the effort reasonably the same. Is the level of interest reasonably the same or in a way that yet still promotes healthy reciprocal love. The idea is to see if they are willing to commit long-term and deal with each other's flaws even when attraction is no longer there. I think as a parent, your goal is to oversee this process in a balanced hands-off and invovled way. Loose enough for them to feel comfortable but available enough to give wise council and direction for a healthy relationship. Dating is simply the vehicle to get there to marriage so, it should not be so pressured but in its own way, it is intentional. They should try to understand each other. Sex with complicate & exasperate things so, building friendships is a necessity. You need friendships because that shows compatibility. Friendships with romance is a good combination. As they learn to strategize their own relationship, they can know you had a semi-involved hand in its success. Eventually, they can be married and be independent together; with mention of your council every now & again. Do not be afraid. Be wise, living, and available. And most of all, be prepared to answer some questions. Not everything has to be given specifc answer to be perfect but answer this question: "is it loving" or "is it considerate"; or "is it helpful"?

[@Flammenhagel]

People shouldn't date, they should get married as teens

[@samwaelarmoush2321]

L take

[@Theohybrid]

Back then, things were far simpler to be done. However today, there is so much pressure to perform in various ways. If they decided this, they should go to another place that affirms this. But considering most of us live in the modern world, the most we can do is equip them in a way that informs them but also gives them confidence and preparation in wisdom and mutual support. Back then, there was little choice so analysis paralysis wasn't so much of an issue. FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) can ruin people & The Sunken Cost Fallacy can ruin people already in a bad relationship. So teaching them good yet modern & relevant relationship information can prepare them for this modern world as they enter into dating.