Starbucks Accident / スタバ粗相

Learn Japanese pitch-accent and pronunciation from my Patreon Series "Japanese Phonetics"
/ dogen
Starbucks Accident / スタバ粗相 / Poop / I pooped my pants at Starbucks / スターバックスでウンチを漏らした / スターバックス / スタバ

[@nanwijanarko1969]

I have to pause several times because I'm overcomed by secondhand shame.

[@Osprey1994]

Exactly I don't think I can finish the video 🤣

[@suzbone]

@@Osprey1994 I had to keep my husband from running out of the room, more than once

[@dynamid4540]

It's been hard on me as well

[@maixl8631]

Lol me too

[@dougthemoleman]

Same.

[@BrandonIacovella]

The seven ways to commit suicide line killed me. lmao. Fantastic work as always, Dogen. :)

[@innnn663]

i bet it did! sorry it was a very (s/b)ad joke

[@WizardManMerlin]

"God is a raging sadist" I'm laughing too hard in the library I'm getting looks. Incidentally, I was just studying for my next class, Japanese. Great stuff, Dogen, keep it up!

[@Dogen]

thanks ^^ hope your studies are going well!

[@anon38705]

Don't laugh too hard something comes out of you

[@et.anthem]

@@Dogen God is a slapstick comedian is the best dialogue I've heard in months

[@BiznatchWang]

You're a phenomenal writer

[@Dogen]

thanks ant ^^

[@blufudgecrispyrice8528]

I agree

[@kdhanimesan]

"I impulsively clench my third iris." XD That one had me

[@prekshashrivastava2438]

What is third iris?

[@kdhanimesan]

@@prekshashrivastava2438 since the iris is round and can kind of close and in stress situations like that, one would feel "tight" it is a weird metaphor for the actual anus clenching!

[@prekshashrivastava2438]

@@kdhanimesan ohh😅

[@VoidSkipper]

I bought a personal fitness tracker recently, and it confirms that this story caused me considerable stress.

[@Dogen]

mission accomplished

[@Blu3W4r10Ck]

How much land has the brown warrior taken...

[@bell808]

last time I heard they've already broken down the cheeks area and is about to march down the leg area.

[@PiquantPan]

Ah, the old "Starbucks alias" dating approach. Don't give up, Misaki-san

[@rhuka03]

PiquantPan What might that be? Sorry, I couldn’t quite understand that part of the story 😂

[@kenzilamberto1981]

Please explain this part to me too

[@AmodeusR]

I'm hoping for an explanation as well 🤔

[@Shogoeu]

@@rhuka03 she farted and being ashamed of what happened revealed her true name. It seems many people tell a fake name to the barista, which writes it on their cup - Starbucks Alias.

[@chrisdane2014]

@@Shogoeu doesn't it get more awkward that you told the other person your true name, with them knowing that you farted? I'd stick with my alias if that were me. Hahaha

[@hiimkaiki7508]

i just saw the line and read it as "i haven't pooped in a long time. two years to be specific"

[@majibento]

Unrelated but who’s your pfp?

[@FooBarBash]

Sweet Jesus. I hope this is a work of fiction, Dogen. I want to know that no poops were harmed in the making of this video.

[@Dogen]

half fiction haha

[@skatejam7]

which half, i need to know

[@Dr_Lucozade]

There's a part of me that wants to believe it may have happened to some degree :P

[@likeseating]

@@Dogen I need to know which part is the fiction...

[@Sterarch13]

@@Dogen Dogen PLEASE MAN TELL US LMAO

[@littledodo31]

I can't believe a poop story kept me on the edge of my seat lmao Love all your vids dude!! Can't stop watching them haha

[@Dogen]

the power of poop haha. thanks for the comment man! ^^

[@pradyumniyer5141]

* Insert happy sora the troll noises here *

[@Kamo_shika]

第二言語であるはずの日本語のユーモアあふれた表現が上手すぎて、日本人である私が嫉妬するレベルです。

[@user-pp2sh1pt3p]

I don't usually like toilet humour but this was hilarious, especially the moment Misaki appeared. Yet another great video. You deserve more subscribers.

[@Dogen]

Thanks Birdie ^^ I'm the same way; I tried writing this piece to challenge myself :)

[@hi_sayri]

Every time I go to Starbucks, I shall think of you and Misaki. RIP Dogen 1964-March 27, 2017.

[@elcastrogarcia]

Wait whatttt..... Dogen is 56 years old. This cannot be true, this cannot be true

[@nb664rbk]

@@elcastrogarcia no he's born in 1989

[@nb664rbk]

@@elcastrogarcia i don't know ask him not me

[@LumyTheQueen]

"God isn't a ranging sadist. He is a slapstick comedian." Pure gold.

[@SantiagoChamo]

you should talk to Netflix and make a series about you hahaha

[@Dogen]

lol we shall see!

[@tirrimayin8098]

I'd watch it! :D

[@expresslylesley9207]

Same

[@clearmenser]

@@Dogen It'd be pretty sweet.

[@stefandesu]

"It comes out the same way Kansai-ben comes out after you've spent a couple weeks in Osaka." Best line. At least I can somehow relate. めっちゃ面白かった！ほんまにそう考えてる！

[@RitvikChoudhary]

"In one second I think of seven different ways to commit suicide in a Starbucks." Fkn lost it here. Dogen-sensei you never fail to surpass my expectations xD

[@qualcuno6455]

"By the time I realized it was far too late...the poop was no longer a part of me" that was *deep*

[@Ofjkk]

Dunno, man. The joke was already on the surface at this point imo

[@ZenkaiSlip]

Now that the hat is back I can finally rest easy knowing it is safe.

[@awkwardaquamarine19]

1:54 "Suddenly, and without resistance." It's 5am in my tiny corner of the earth and I couldn't stop laughing! Just stumbled on your channel and subbed after watching a few videos. Super funny! ^_^

[@Dogen]

Thanks!

[@awkwardaquamarine19]

Dogen I stayed in Japan for a month and a half last spring. I hope I can go back there again. It was a life-changing experience for me. Please keep up the fantastic work. Cheers! :)

[@sashamo]

Watching this during quarantine like "ahh, I remember the good old days when anyone could go to a Starbucks..."

[@tvisha98]

You're a literary genius; this is a beautifully crafted (autobiographical?) piece about shitting yourself...I'm genuinely moved.

[@Dogen]

a tour de poo

[@CaesarsSalad]

Half-way through I had to take a several hours pause before watching the rest of the video or I would have died.

[@Yattah123]

I'm saving this to my rainy day playlist. That story was hilarious and your comedic timing was spot on!

[@愚者-i4k]

こんな情緒豊かに表現されたウンコ漏らした話があっただろうか

[@babattaja]

I get the feeling that the song was "Toto - Africa" :Thumbsup:

[@UFOBobTV]

I’ve seen dozens of your videos, and this is the funniest one so far. You had me in stitches.

[@やまだって苗字どう思います]

「ウンコが独立を宣言していた」のところで飲んでたコーヒーでむせて死ぬかと思ったw

[@すごいこむぎこ]

やまだって苗字どう思います? 私もそこでつぼってしまいましたわい😂

[@SimmySaiyuki]

相変わらず日本語表現力すごいｗ 動画を全部見ました。 ファンです！

[@Dogen]

thank you ^^

[@LukeRowlandXXV]

That's not Lukewarm. Only Luke's can confirm that temperature.

[@suzbone]

Mark Twain once said, “I like a good story well told. That is the reason I am sometimes forced to tell them myself.” Twain would have *LOVED* this.

[@AuroraSilverFox]

I'm crying. I had to pause several times due to excessive laughter and suspense. I've been binging your videos since I found your channel and this one made me laugh the hardest so far. 🙈 I scrolled through the comments and lost it all over again. Your channel is so precious. 😂💕

[@cameronschyuder9034]

I also paused several times LOL, but out of secondhand embarrassment, poor Dogen >n

[@The_OPN]

That was the longest 5 minutes of my life

[@manamiinuzuka9742]

なにこれこのおもしろさまじやばにおってきそうな動画😆💦💦

[@Dogen]

Thanks!

[@paulmccool378]

Oh, man. This video literally had me in tears. Hands down the funniest thing I've seen in a while...

[@DogaTvJpn]

Always know it's gonna be a great day when I open youtube and there is a Dogen video.

[@izumi0608]

なんでこんなに文学的にうんちをもらせるのこの人は(笑)

[@kuribayashitoma4149]

話うますぎやろ!!!!!!!!

[@Dogen]

thank you!

[@threeep4023]

Was trying to make toast while watching this. Accidently flung the peanut butter covered knife across the kitchen in a fit of intense laughter. 11/10

[@obeycelestia]

うんこ, 運動, うんめい

[@johnvienna3422]

I've never seen anyone use editing to such good comic effect. Your brutally short and precise cutting really puts the icing on the already brilliantly comedically written comedy cake. You're a master of the medium that is KZbin.

[@phsychialchemist]

I always come back to this and am always appalled at how few views this has. This is just brilliant and it's a crime that it isn't more popular.

[@FluentJapaneseFromAnime]

Hi, Dogen. I love your lessons and particularly your series on phonetics. I'm guilty of teaching Japanese with a gaijin accent, but your series has inspired me to begin to improve on it. I understand now how important pitch accent is, and I will emphasize its importance in my future videos as well as my poor accent. Keep up the good work!

[@Dogen]

Thank you ^^ hope that you are able to learn some practical information from the series! Let me know if you ever have any questions! :D

[@cherry5436]

神様はどSだってクソワロ

[@Dogen]

ありがとうございます＾＾

[@RocelynA23]

Your voice is super soothing ^__^ I'm glad you made a collab with Joey 👌👏

[@Dogen]

Thank you very much ^^ was super fun making the vid with him, Joey's a great guy :)

[@pancakes1592]

Holy shit, I was about to skip the end of the video due to cringe overload and then deciding whether death is a better end to me, but I'm glad I stayed till the end. Ya'll people need to go shit when you need to shit. Oh btw do you design apps? Mind telling me how you started out? I'm interested in those kinds of things.

[@BiznatchWang]

if dogen also does apps I'm going to flip, how can one person be so multi-talented?

[@Dogen]

I published a few short stories in the app store using a template code. This is one of the scripts from the apps :) Can't tell you much more besides that as that's basically the extent of my knowledge! thanks for the support ^^

[@Dogen]

cause I just bought a pre-written code and put in my scripts haha. the easy way!

[@KnowOne111]

I was almost as relieved as he was by the twist. But why am I watching an American make comedy skits in Japanese with English subtitles?

[@nat_love999]

おもしろい～！　今度スタバ行く時思い出し笑いしないようにしないと（笑）

[@khatharrmalkavian3306]

"I hadn't pooped my pants in a long time." This is going to be a good one.

[@filipgibarac8283]

the fact that this is public is a blessing, this surpasses any netflix stand up i've seen this year. thank you

[@JayAreEm]

I discovered this channel three days ago and I can't stop watching. This video is, by far, my favorite. Everything about it is amazing and the line delivery had me in tears! WHY didn't I discover this channel before?!

[@_momijiyoshida6613]

Dogenさんの視点が他のKZbinrと違ってて面白い😂 日本人として反省する点も多くて、勉強になります😌

[@DeathBringer769]

The ONE time it's a nice young lady instead of an old man chatting him up... and he poops his pants! Lmao :D

[@v4mp1r384]

Man, you're going to kill me one of these days. Your scripts are brilliant and make me laugh my ass off, regardless of me not having spent a single day in Japan. Keep it up.

[@ぐちん-u8x]

大変面白かったです！😆

[@adiabeticjedi3278]

I found your channel from an anime. Not gonna lie, this was one time Google spy advertisement went well. I have another channel to binge for a couple weeks.

[@pickleberry3011]

「神様はドSだ」 "God is a raging sadist" I'm dying over here please send help

[@ic139]

pwahahaha OMG wow man... hilarious way to start my day pooping (everyone does it, why be ashamed) . . . . . . . . Dogen x Misaki OTP (one true poop)

[@Dogen]

one true poop

[@NebelungFlower]

This is my favorite channel on KZbin, thank you

[@kotsverslimme]

This is one form of scatological humor I can get behind.

[@take8945]

スタバに行ったことはないがリア充のまえで盛大に自殺をする方法なら7つくらい考えついたことはある

[@Bareerah123]

I've rewatched this a dozen times (maybe more) and still think it's brilliant -- you're a really phenomenal writer!

[@AyazHamid]

I was watching this while pooping ironically enough and my howls of laughter resembling a drug addled chihuahua in the bathroom at 4 in the morning woke up my entire household :’ ). You are mad talented when it comes to writing Dogen 🤣

[@ksk6589]

この天才はもっと世に広がるべきだ。

[@Sunbreaker7]

このビデオの間にはずっと激に微笑んだ。素晴らしい

[@petitmeowmeow]

As long as I don't jump up and start dancing KARA's "Mister" I died

[@Efreeti]

XD the booty dance

[@tofu4919]

ここ数年で1番笑った、チャンネル登録します😂

[@indybee4581]

This is by far the funniest video I have ever seen, ありがとう！

[@winza83]

Fantastic story. Your stories are amazing but this one is the best of all. 面白いですよ!

[@natalieputnam9811]

This was fabulous thank you for t smiles and laughs this brought me ☺️

[@Zoular]

What type of comedy would this fall under? It is hilarious

[@adityakuppa694]

I love the imagery in your writing!

[@vivodmann5407]

This was a whole-ass rollercoaster I did not realize I bought the ticket for XD

[@Dinckelburg]

This was a whole ass-rollercoaster too

[@thathappyfellow8172]

I was on the edge of my seat the whole time 😂 absolutely amazing

[@hiyayakkoun8353]

まるで小説の一部を切り取ったかのような花のある言い回しと物語の情景が容易に頭に浮かぶ、綺麗な構成に感銘を受けました。

[@jdjsjfjdj6457]

表現の仕方が面白い😂😂😂

[@ねこねこねこねこ-b6m]

表現の仕方がとても凄かった！動画を飽きずにずっと観れたのは久しぶりだ！

[@gnpar]

Nice writing. It reminded me of a Yasutaka Tsutsui tale called "I'm naked" or something like that.

[@Osprey1994]

I'm sorry I can't finish this the direction it's headed seems tragic.

[@jonathangrimm5850]

Went to look up Master by Kara and imagining you doing that dance in the situation really got me laughing. 😄

[@bbskaai3864]

サンキューMisaki... いや、田中ゆかさん。

[@yayalu8650]

Holy shit that’s hilarious. No pun intended

[@nagywywy]

I teared up from held back giggling so my roommate doesn't think I'm a total idiot. This video is beautiful

[@amaterasu48]

詩的な脱糞エピソードw

[@ABlueOrb]

a normal day indeed.

[@omnipotatoentfushia1858]

You could quote just about any part of this video, it's almost too good

[@tonyg1296]

I really enjoy your stories. Comedy genius

[@cleanphreak5103]

Easily my favorite video of yours

[@moim002]

ほんまおもろいｗシモネタ卑怯やろと思いつつも面白すぎる

[@Dogen]

ありがとうございます！＾＾今回は品のあるシモネタを作ることが目的だった。笑

[@user-gogogoooooo]

事実を淡々と述べるだけじゃなくて例えとか情景とか心情を細かく言ってて話にどんどん引き込まれます！！語りが本当に上手ですね！羨ましいくらいです^ ^

[@ImGonnaShout2000]

Absolutely fantastic

[@yamyammaot]

I just saved this. A narrative that involves pooping in starbucks. 30 is hitting me weird.

[@sgenius0]

This might be your best comedy video yet!

[@nononsensetravel]

This video made me so happy, I love that you went back to a story one they're my absolute favourites

[@Dogen]

I much prefer these videos as well, they just take much longer to produce, which is why they are less common. Will be videos like this each when when I'm here full time ^^

[@litera18]

KARAのミスターで爆笑しました🤣 最近ドーゲンさんのチャンネル登録したんですけど面白すぎて、一気に見るの勿体無いから少しずつ見てます😆💓

[@UtahOutcastsArchive]

If I wasn't already subscribed, this would be the one to make me do so. おめでとうございます

[@troyvarius8676]

Although thankful for subtitles since only having started learning Japanese, I found myself wheezing at; "How much land has the brown warrior taken?". By the end? Oxygen barely existed within my body. Truly enjoyed this one, thank you!

[@siscubatry1678]

Here for your stories!

[@sakurachan3547]

Why was I so engrossed in this?