How to Say No When Asked To Sew For Others

[@scorpioninblue]

Good advice from a good heart! What annoys me the most is that people constantly want you to fix things for them but never want to pay you for your hard work and effort! Everyone wants the world at Walmart prices! Then to make matters worse they'll tell you how easy it's going to be and they can't even thread a needle! My thing is telling them in polite but firm terms to pay a dry cleaner that specializes in alterations!

[@Stylesewme]

That's exactly what I say! "I actually don't do alterations, but did you know your dry cleaner probably does!"

[@NiceNCurvy]

Thank you! I don't want to do custom sewing. I'd rather sew to sell. I tried taking an order a few times and it was terrible! They never came for measurements and gave me the run arounds. I ended up cutting some really nice fabric (that I purchased) for nothing. I knew then that I did not want to sew for people. I especially don't like the fact that people think you want to hem, patch, take in, let out, add buttons, etc. just because you sew. It's annoyingI have learned to say "no" as nicely as possible. One lady said that God said that I was going to do her wedding dresses. I figured if He did He would have told me too. lol!

[@Stylesewme]

God, though?? She really wanted you to make that dress!! Thanks, Tiff!

[@juwairatugrace5874]

Tiff G lol..In my case I didn't cut the fabric but I had taken measurements for this client,she didn't agree with my price but didn't propose her price,but went away quietly and assumed I'll sew her dress without an agreement.. I didn't, so she asked for her fabric and I happily gave it back..I love sewing but I love my peace more😂

[@ServalLeptailurus]

Thank you for your great videos and advice. I think that cheap, mass produced goods have really altered peoples expectations and sense of value. I sew as a hobby, but I do my own designs and draft and/or drape my own patterns. When I get friends coming to me really enthusiastically, asking me to sew something for them and that they are going to pay me and how much it would cost I usually just ,very politely, explain the process. You know, measuring, making a pattern, possibly a mockup, doing fittings, altering the pattern, doing the final garment plus the price of my materials and by that time they have usually calculated in their head how many H&M dresses they could buy for that money and have lost interest. I don't even think they are trying to get something out of me as cheaply as possible, but simply have no idea how much time and work goes into making something completely from scratch. Or that good quality fabric can be pricey ;-)

[@Stylesewme]

You're 10000000% on the money with this! Thanks for commenting!

[@amyp5976]

This is great advice. I've run into this with baking. People want pies at Thanksgiving and Christmas. One year I did 20 pies and all of a sudden something I love to do and found my joy in doing turned into something I dreaded. I will never do it again! Plus, I ended up losing money because the cost of baking a pie did not match what they were willing to pay.

[@christinewhitehair6402]

The part about being gracious would apply to any difficult situation in life. Thank you for your sagacious advice. I do sew for myself and occasionally have someone ask me to sew. I say " I always like to tell people upfront I probably won't be saving you any money than if you bought ready made but you will be getting exactly what you want " . It usually goes no further than. r

[@PH-no5he]

wow I am so grateful for this video and the comments from your viewers! im glad to see that I am not alone and I have certainly lost the passion once I started excepting orders. I plan on stopping and now know how to say no and get back to sewing just for me and my daughters, at my own time with no pressure from clients.

[@crb1959]

Thank you. I'm often asked to sew for others.... Small things: hems, repairing seams, etc. I do it. It's not fun for me ... Especially when they need it "right away".Thank you for these suggestions. I insist on gracious for myself, and your suggestions are lovely.

[@susangreder5300]

I've been teaching sewing for over 25 years. I wish I had your message all those years to say what I floundered around trying to say. Your spirt is beautiful and you are being used. Thank you!

[@Stylesewme]

Thank you so much, Susan!

[@UmbrellaAve]

I LOVE this! I struggle with this so much and always feel terrible saying no. But you're right: it takes all of the fun out when you feel pressured to make something for someone.

[@janeller.7253]

I needed this video a few months ago. I wished I had the courage to say no to this one person I did three outfits for.

[@fay8233]

I love this. Sewing is mos def my hobby. sometimes you are accused of bring selfish if you decline to sew for someone. But like you I do see it as a compliment majority of the time. Thank you for this video, it is definitely food for thought and so helpful. I have subscribed.

[@lisasapp5696]

I just got a call asking to see something that's out of my skill set and referred her to someone who is great in creating the look she wants. I listen to you this morning :) Great info.

[@AmbitiousJemzAstrology]

yessss thats how i feel! I just want to do it for myself and be able to post online in pride of what i made without having people ask. I do take it as a compliment tho. . . Great advice you gave! Thank you. I am glad you made this video.

[@annas.5894]

What a lovely and kind way of dealing with people. This could be applied to many different circumstances. Thank you. 🙏

[@patriot8938]

I am recently retired and my sister and her husband are always asking me to do alterations and/or repairs for them. My sister told me, well you don't have anything to do now. Really? Of course I do it. My kids do the same thing, but if it is not worth the trouble I can always offer to buy them whatever it is new. Then there are my two wonderful little grandsons. They are always asking Nana to make a quilt for them, and without reservation I do it. They have a lot of quilts, and I will make more.

[@kellypatterson9456]

Can you sew this button on? I'd make them do it in front of me with my instruction. Then I'd charge them ten bucks. How does a person not know how to replace a button?

[@ShutokaJefferson]

this video hits home I've been struggling with this for a while I don't like to be stressed about projects and many can take you there thanks for sharing

[@remejamurray5369]

Everything you said was so true, what a great idea to post this advice. It used to be difficult for me to say NO, but over time I have gained enough confidence to say no and I even refer them to someone else. Thanks

[@annettemcilwain4652]

You have very GOOD ADVIC also,my MOTHER was a SEAMSTRESS for over 40yrs.She sewed on HER job for our choirs & by word of MOUTH in the COMMUNITIES as well!!!

[@plaidgirl107]

after i'm done with this last project I will be saying this is only a hobby for me thanks for posting this

[@explaincauseidontgetit3294]

You are amazing! I've done so many random fixes and stuff that I was waaaaaay in over my head, lolol and I've felt crazy bc of it, but I LOVE the challenge. But I allow it to overwhelm me. And when I saw the title of this video...you and I just clicked!

[@alisoncurtin2883]

I love the way you are articulating these thoughts and ideas. thank you!

[@IANE3177]

You just confirmed the way I've been feeling. Thank you so much for your insight.

[@RileyDog48]

I just came across your channel today and I am so glad I did! Often I hear advice given to respond to customers in an overly firm and harsh tone and that's not me in my personal life so that certainly won't be me with my customers. The way you suggest to respond is the way I respond to my customers as well. I am finally at the point where I want to take my semi-serious 'hobby" more serious and you have some wonderful suggestions that I'm certainly going to use! Thanks!

[@jackiemaddox6933]

Great advice...Especially the part about being put on the spot! I actually took a class some years ago about saying no and meaning it. 🙂 you don't want to be rude but you do want to be firm. Thx for sharing

[@cc83jc85]

I saw this heading...and wow!! I'm 69 nearly, I'm an average to good sewer, I can make my clothes and lots of patchwork for charity.... but yes, an extended family member"...asked in the past to do her wedding dress, when I just had met her dad (that I did marry later, and 17 years later we strill are) ) ..hems, ..- when I hardly knew her..and still she hasnt made the effort to get to know me- 17 years alter..I dont think that paying for the dress would even cross her mind..only for free....I've learnt over the years. Who appreciates my work and who doesn't. I had 15 projects in line at one stage...it all takes time, that my beautiful husband has to help in house work and cooking etc..otherwise it wouldn't get finished..non- sewers don't realise how long it takes to sew anything!

[@lindalking1269]

Thank you so much! I am an advanced beginner (if that exists):) and have been approached to sew for others. I did once, but was so resentful for being asked, because it took the fun out of it. I had deadlines, then! Now I know how to say no! Thanks again!

[@jasmeenmuhammad7126]

Thank you so much for sharing. I'm new to sewing & I enjoy sewing project as a hobby. I was feeling really bad saying no. When I made hair and makeup ad a job I lost my love for it. I don't want that to happen again. Loooove your page😉😘🤗

[@Stylesewme]

+Jasmeen Muhammad Thanks, Jasmeen!

[@TiffTheJackOfAllTrades]

I appreciate the information you are giving to those of us who are starting off in our own sewing business ventures... keep up with the wonderful vids, I will be looking forward to all the great info you will continue to put out. Thank you from your new sub! 😊💗

[@denicebembery1045]

Great instructions, I hear ur integrity & I love that, thx so much, blessings to u & yours😎

[@NubianThreads]

I absolutely love your advice on all of your videos! New subie here!!!!!!

[@Stylesewme]

Thanks, Sis! Welcome!

[@Kiky812]

People should value time more..your time! 😊

[@lisawest8037]

I am so glad I came across this!!! Love your advise!!! Thank you!!!!!

[@nubienne34]

Excellent advice!

[@Stylesewme]

+nubienne34 Thank you!

[@kingdomarts2974]

Good advice, and honest.

[@1SewSweet]

Great video! And very timely for me, I experienced exactly what you're discussing in all forms! Unfortunately, I had to get very comfortable with saying the word "no". Mostly due in part because of being asked to so for individuals and some because they wanted it cheaper...they stated so! Others because they really liked what I was wearing! Lastly, because I've been stuck in a few projects that were "nightmares", again this teaches you the word no! (However this last one is a tough pill to swallow when you are in a bad project!)

[@Stylesewme]

+1SewSweet Yes! Sometimes you just never know what will end up as a bad project. I admit that sometimes I consider the body shape of the requestor versus what they are asking for. If I am 1000% sure it will not look right on them or will make fitting an absolute nightmare, I just say no and refer them to someone else who is willing to take on the challenge.

[@NikkiDavisAFashionAddict]

Good advice! Give referrals + always be grateful.

[@veronicamills5417]

that was really good advice..Thank you!

[@lcarlson1538]

I wish I had listened to this years ago when a friend asked me to hem 5 pairs of pants as a favor. Hemming is my least favorite sewing task and I sew for a hobby. I was resentful that something I was asked to do for free was a.) something I don't love doing and b.) using up time I wanted to spend on my own projects. Thank you for the wisdom and insight!

[@Stylesewme]

FIVE!! Oh gosh, bless you Laurie!! You're most welcome.

[@poipoiparty8427]

I love sewing and I hate hemming, so I 100% feel you on that. I have several very petite family members that I always get asked to hem pants and skirts for, lol.

[@sagaciouslysage9454]

New subscriber here. Impressive video. Being gracious, persistent, included with a specific talent is in fact, few of the keys to success. Thank you! ~Sage

[@IluvmySS]

This is so helpful! Thank you for sharing your experience...I can relate to so much of what you discussed (especially with family) Thanks!

[@valerieb.4912]

Greetings, I find you extremely professional and cordial in your videos. You are giving good advice to the novices and professionals. I have subscribed to your videos and you are an inspirational young person with excellent insight. The Lord has blessed you well.

[@lisaeaton7469]

You are AWESOME! Thank you.

[@Stylesewme]

Thank you, Lisa!

[@marystovall9290]

I like that because I have a hard time saying it not wanting to hurt feelings so Thank you

[@craftywithstyle1]

Excellent suggestion! I can truly appreciate what you said! thank you!

[@kizzyannisom5956]

Great day awesome one, I appreciate your share of how to continue to prosper in abundance. I am a practitioner of healthy energy flow and I know what I give out comes in a form that I have to deal with. So, treating others with love is felt by me first and I agree gratitude is a gift I love opening daily. Your are awesome and I am grateful for this confirmation.

[@MZFASHIONGEM]

I completely agree, happens to me all the time. thanks for this video.

[@colleenglea]

Great advice it a topic worth talking about!

[@krwoods125]

Thank youuu!!! I'm in the middle of heming a 2ND pair of slacks this week for a friend (and for free) because I didn't have the heart to turn him down (3rd request in a year). Now, I have something to work with :).

[@Stylesewme]

+krwoods125 I'm glad it helped!

[@judynathan2702]

Thank you, very helpful. 😊

[@bmcdowell50]

I am comfortable with the word NO too. Ty you for the video

[@MrsPorfiria]

Amen...wow yes thank you great advice

[@DeniseOforiwah]

I LOVE everything in this video and agree!!! I do want to start my own business but im still tryna get comfortable with making clothing for different sizes

[@kellypatterson9456]

Sometimes the adjustment just can't be done.

[@lashauwnbeyond]

Great video !!!! Thank you !!

[@Valley__]

I make so many things to sell. But ppl only ask me to make custom items for them.

[@sandreawhite7534]

Well said.

[@rlcreationstt8119]

amazing advice thanks so much

[@Stylesewme]

+Rl creationstt You're welcome!

[@vintagegirl68]

Where did you get your cutting table? Thanks for this video!

[@Stylesewme]

+Gina g Check out the infor to my cutting mat in my sewing studrio tour: www.stylesewme.com/my-sewing-studio/

[@esi0313]

Great video! The more I sew, the more requests I get. I'm going to start saying that I do it as hobby. Off topic question: What size is your cutting mat and where did you get it from?

[@Stylesewme]

+esi0313 My mat is custom at 32" x 64" and I got it from Cutting-Mats.net. Thank you!

[@esi0313]

+Style Sew Me Cool, thanks!

[@daisycopeland9994]

thanks ERYN

[@tlunceford77]

My sister love putting me on front street. Not just with sewing either.

[@Stylesewme]

+tabby314 That's what sisters do best! lol

[@LadieBjj]

I sew for myself.

[@daisycopeland9994]

great tutorials

[@colettevalentine9912]

Have you find the sewing club yet?

[@Eiramilah]

WHat if they're Not offering money? I dont mind hemming pants and doing minor repairs but some people talk about making them a dress etc.

[@Stylesewme]

Your boundaries are totally up to you! Beyonce herself couldn't pay me a million dollars to sew one stitch for her. That's how clear I am about not sewing for people. hahaha!

[@jolyshafashionsug7846]

Thanks so much dear. But I would like to have your email for more advises pls

[@Stylesewme]

I don't give 1-on-1 support at this time, but your'e welcome to leave questions on my videos and I'll answer as best as I can.

[@fay8233]

I love this. Sewing is mos def my hobby. sometimes you are accused of bring selfish if you decline to sew for someone. But like you I do see it as a compliment majority of the time. Thank you for this video, it is definitely food for thought and so helpful. I have subscribed.