Surprising Things About the Mennonites - Samantha Trenkamp Bender - Ep. 210

[@bongodrums1000]

About the Mennonite Game: I knew my cousin lived in a Mennonite community about an hour from us but I didn't know where. We drove to that area and ate at an Amish-Mennonite restaurant. My wife asked how I was going to find my cousin and I replied that I'd just ask the Mennonite waitress. My wife laughed and asked, "How would the waitress know where your cousin lives?" So I asked and the waitress told us how to get there but added, "But I don't think they're home this weekend. Let me call their daughter to find out." My wife, who had little experience in the Amish and Mennonite communities, couldn't get over the fact that the waitress knew my cousin and his whole family.

[@AnabaptistPerspectives]

That’s the way it works :-)

[@gregorys5864]

What is a seeker? Is it to be a anabaptist or following Jesus? Volleyball? My son lives an hour from Sarasota and the beach had a volleyball tournament full of anabaptists menonite

[@plainlady1]

I've long said that the official sport of the Anabaptist is volleyball. Another thing, can the how would the Anabaptist survive without their four part harmony and reunions? There seems to be a reunion for everything, even one for 'seekers'!

[@JerryFox-h9s]

You did not mention Dutch Blitz! I am from a non-mennonite background, have been in our church for approaching 10 years. We were not looking for one when we found our church. I agree, keeping a good sense of humor is important , as well as being able to laugh at yourself. I have what is normally a Mennonite last name, but none of my family have ever been anywhere near a mennonite church, except my daughters. It creates all sorts of humorous situations, I sometimes try to see how long I can fly under the radar, Like all NMBs I have a story. Jerry from Baltimore.

[@ReaganSchrock]

Oh my how could we forget that? Great point. That game is very much part of Mennonite culture. I've played countless games over the years.

[@Benjamin-jo4rf]

@@JerryFox-h9s I think it's hilarious because real mennonites will never have playing cards but will have a broken and tattered deck of Dutch blitz dating to before the Vietnam war

[@JerryFox-h9s]

@@Benjamin-jo4rf I still cannot play it at anything approaching normal speed. Kinda like volleyball , but I am a bit old for that.

[@Benjamin-jo4rf]

@@JerryFox-h9s i also get scolded for slowing up game times with family. I'm not competitive, I just am happy to be with family.

[@SamuelHaydenARC]

I think the main thing that's different in going to a Mennonite Church for the first time versus another church is I think people experience almost like a wall of resistance. Not everyone thankfully, but I think that's the difference. Even in language of describing the new experience there seems to be a very closed off feeling with some, not all church goers. For example, everyone seems to agree that the most overwhelming and different church experience for any new comer is the Orthodox Church. But Orthodox people and Orthodox leaders will always say that there's nothing to worry about. It's going to be different at first but there's no pressure to know it all or understand it all right away because no one understood everything right away. Another Bishop even said if you can go to an Orthodox church and not be overwhelmed then something is wrong. Everyone, in terms of Orthodox for example, says you don't need to worry about anything, just go and no one will judge you. Whereas in terms of the Mennonite church the conversation seems to stop at we're different than you, sorry. That's not a very welcoming attitude, and again, that's just some, not all. After all we are all human beings and no one is perfect. But that is what I think the problem is for some people. Again, any new tradition or style of faith is going to be different but it comes down to if that difference is accepting of you or not.

[@SamuelHaydenARC]

@@richardreece6712 Excellent point. Why do you think that is? But I would agree with that.

[@michellehochstedler7809]

The community that I moved a lot of the married weman work away. That was so new to me. But here I am, doing the samething. I totally forgot about smashing the hair bun on the wall.😂😂 those were the days of wearing a covering. 😅 another thing is hard to fit into a new community when you are married and do not have children. If you don't have children, you just don't fit into the normal mennonite world. You can feel like a outcast. It can be hard for older singles as well. You can get overlooked. Some churches do really well including older singles and other churches, do not.

[@AnabaptistPerspectives]

Thank you for sharing these observations, Michelle.

[@frerame]

Wow... interesting!!! I grew up in a Christian church very close to Mennonite way. Last Sunday I became a member of a Mennonite Church after less than a year attending this church. I feel so great worshipping and being around other members of this church

[@AnabaptistPerspectives]

We're glad to hear that God has given you a church!

[@actuallyunaware]

As for why so many mennonites know how to play the accordion and harmonica my understanding is that its the result of a number of our values. We place a lot of value on family and worshiping God as a family. So families will sing together and if a parent knows an instrument most likely a child will want to learn how to play it as well. We also tend to be spendthrifts so if a parent already has an instrument its more appealing to teach a child that instrument, instead of needing to purchase a different one. Harmonicas and Accordians are also more portable than something like a piano and with the prominance of hymn sings in the Mennonite church more portable instruments are preferred. Or at least that's my current working hypothesis.

[@AnabaptistPerspectives]

This is interesting. Thank you for sharing, Grace.

[@joeschmoe487]

Samantha is great. She is a wonderful guide for those who are interested.

[@AnabaptistPerspectives]

We were also glad to have her join us for this conversation :-)

[@Benjamin-jo4rf]

She is also very gullible and just blindly follows what she is told to "fit in" as she calls it in this video.

[@lorettamiller9876]

Imteresting convo! A response to owning land versus renting, ive heard it explained that our ancestors were peasant farmers and could not own land and when they migrated that became a big thing for them to own their own land/home. Much of what we do is clearly passed down from history. Such as running when things get hard, especially church conflict. What other ppl group base their decision to move, on churches alone? Most ppl will move because of jobs, but anabaptist move entire states and more because of church. 🤷🏼‍♀️ Just an interesting thought...

[@JerryFox-h9s]

It reflects on the importance of the fellowship of the body of Christ plays in our thought processes. It is very much the center of our lives.

[@AnabaptistPerspectives]

Thanks for this interesting commentary.

[@Peace4179]

I think this is excellent and is more important for Anabaptist listeners possibly even then others. The saddest thing to me is when cultural norms are expected of anyone who wants to be a part of the church and are held up as Gospel. I know it is not like that in every setting. It's true that some of the things are great and things that can be beneficial, but there are probably just as many negatives that we need help to see and drop! Why can't we learn more from each other? I agree with the comments that the Anabaptist church is in great need of being stretched culturally if they want to grow and become better and stronger and if the goal really is to be a place where people from all cultures can unify around the Word of God. I appreciated the key of not taking ourselves and everything so seriously. Let cultural things be simply what they are - just the way we have learned things. Be sensitive to ways you may unintentionally create pressure or expectation that someone from another culture doesn't understand or is familiar with. Be ok with everyone being different and actually welcome that and find ways you can learn things that would be good to change in your own life from them. ❤️

[@AnabaptistPerspectives]

Thank you for sharing this, Esther.

[@Benjamin-jo4rf]

Not going to happen. This stuff comes from the top down. I saw it most at kingdom fellowship weekend being espoused by widely respected leaders such as John D Martin. He snapped his suspenders and stuck his nose in the air and said "we are proud to be Romans". It's on video. From about two years ago.

[@LyndonRisser]

Well done. Those that were not raised in our culture, but attracted by our values, will at some point need to trade in their fascination for reality or become disillusioned. Cultures are made up of people, and people have inconsistencies. Those inconsistencies can quickly become our justification to discount any good that is in the culture. Isn't it interesting how those that leave a culture often exploit that culture's inconsistencies and faults to justify their decision? Doesn't that just validate they are not sure the made a wise decision? Cultures are not sustainable without shared core values. Inconsistencies across all cultures have escalated in this generation of wealth and technology that breeds independence and self-governance.

[@AnabaptistPerspectives]

Thank you for sharing this, Lyndon.

[@ruthgoebel723]

Culture is a big issue. I was raised Lutheran (ELCA) but left that synod due to their slide into ungodly things. I have been in the Mennonite church for about 20 years and have really seen and heard rather off-putting things. People asking who my parents are. Who does that? I realize they are trying to figure out what family I am from, but I found that rather rude. Comments like: "You only have one child?", "I don't imagine you have a garden", "How do you know all these things?", etc. Another thing I found weird, is having a conversation with someone and when that person apparently runs out of something to say, they simply walk away. No graceful way to wrap up a conversation. Add to that, the non-plain people assuming I know nothing about the 'outside' world. I have a degree in computer science and people can't believe a Mennonite would have any knowledge of that. I wish the ministry would more thoroughly study into other church groups before they make pronouncements about their theology. I have heard so many erroneous, handed-down mistruths about other groups, I find it will mislead yet another generation. Twenty years of this is about all I can handle, to be honest.

[@Benjamin-jo4rf]

​@@ruthgoebel723Mennonites are the most passive aggressive people you will meet. They are pacifist or claim to be "non resistant" but in reality they are extremely resistant and confrontational and quite rude/ socially awkward. It's because they are insulated in their cult. They call it culture but it's really just a well insulated white supremacist cult

[@lmmartin959]

I think the accordion comes from a German background-- polkas.

[@mzebonyeyes13]

This was so fun to listen to! I grew up in an Anabaptist Apostolic church, and I'm learning they are so much more similar than I thought, especially the bloodline "game."

[@Kneißle]

Next to harmonicas, accordians may be the second most commonly tolerated instrument; even when others are still forbidden. I've attended Groffdale conf. (Old order) Sat. Eve. young crowd singings where the house or schoolhouse is cleared of benches after the singing, and a square dance takes place until the wee hours of the morning, the music being provided by harmonicas, accordians, and perhaps a stainless steel canner for rhythm (depending on the area). I'm assuming these practices just slipped in at an early date, borrowed from what was popular in the society around them at the time, just as current fads tend to influence us today.

[@AnabaptistPerspectives]

Thank you for sharing your observations and experience.

[@dorothywillms115]

I grew up Mennonite Brethern in western Canada. Never heard of anyone using these instruments or playing volleyball. But in the 1930’s,40’s and 50’s some Mennonites were very against their children playing sports on Sunday. You were supposed to rest on Sundays or go to family gatherings. People also played lots of games especially pinochle,,,,,,we called it knipsbrat in German. Monopoly was also big. What about food customs? Such as plooma moose which is a cold fruit soup or Platz, a cookie sheet size pastry made with fruit. Farmer sausage and perogies ,which we called verinike or watermelon and roll kuchen? They used to bring in loads of watermelon in wooden box trucks from California and everyone would flock to a Mennonite grocery store. Some people made pickles out of the rinds and made watermelon syrup as well. At Christmas time we would eat Halva by the box. That went by the wayside side too as it’s become extremely expensive. I think it’s made from Sesime seeds and imported. Oh what about borscht? Cabbage soup with tomatoes and beef? Or Pham kuchen which are like 😊French crepes or pancakes. Did any of you have fester or (faspa in low German) on Sunday afternoon? It’s kind of like a tea with lots of baking. How about Zweibak? That’s a bun with a smaller one on top. It’s called tweibak in low German.Some of our customs likely came from Southern Russia where a huge group of Mennonites lived until the Russian revolution. For MB’s the German language was king in Russia,especially low German,pronounced plootdietch until the 1960’s in Canada. It changed with the times and children had to learn English to go to school. We drove whatever vehical we wanted and dressed as we wished. Again,until the 60’s women wore little hats to church and dressed in dull colors and conservatively. Head coverings were unheard of though. Men wore green pants for workwear,jeans were rather frowned upon. Ladies wore simple,modest dresses. But that’s all changed. Some people played violins or cellos but piano lessons were standard and expected at least for girls. We had a lot of choirs and it was very important at school. Women had buns when I was little but the younger women began to cut their hair and have perms. Makeup,smoking, drinking,dancing and movies were all sinful. So much has changed our culture since Mennonites immigrated from Ukraine 100 years ago. Now we are very much like a Baptist or Aliance church. But we love our food. Many MB’s have married into other denominations which used to be frowned upon. That alone has changed things a lot to be contemporary. The thing that really matters is that we have accepted Christ to be our personal Savior and live a life that pleases him.

[@toddbonin6926]

I wish there were Mennonites near where I live.

[@A.RandomLattin]

What is your town or zip code?

[@toddbonin6926]

@@A.RandomLattin 71201

[@johnbanman4913]

Where do you live my friend?

[@toddbonin6926]

@@A.RandomLattin I’m in Monroe, Louisiana. For some reason, when I type in my location. KZbin keeps deleting it.

[@toddbonin6926]

@@johnbanman4913 I’m in Monroe, Louisiana.

[@jillv4006]

This is my first time seeing you guys and I have some Mennonite friends who say their beliefs don’t allow them to have photos of themselves (except government required ID’s like drivers licenses). Do you believe the same and if so doesn’t having your image on KZbin contradict that? Thanks in advance for answering.

[@AnabaptistPerspectives]

This is a good question, Jill. There is a very wide range of Mennonites. Some, like your friends, avoid photos and photography. Others, such as ourselves, don't share this objection.

[@jillv4006]

@@AnabaptistPerspectives thank you for the clarification. Have a blessed day!

[@AnabaptistPerspectives]

👍🏻

[@Benjamin-jo4rf]

20:00 men can have mullets and wear tight fitting jeans and Abercrombie tshirts but the women have to dress like laura ingalls Wilder

[@dorothywillms115]

Really. I grew up Mennonite Brethern. In the 50’s and 60’s. Although my mom sewed everything for us girls we dressed stylishly. Laura Ingals is early American dress and I think it’s cute for little girls. I had dresses that really flared and in the 50’s and early 60’s crinolines were all the rage.

[@Benjamin-jo4rf]

@@dorothywillms115 I agree the Laura ingalls Wilder look is appealing and there is a lot of nuance among styles in different communities.

[@1Whipperin]

Did Samantha get permission from her husband or father to have intercourse with this "strange"man? In the societal context of the Bible, it was customary for women to seek permission or guidance from their husbands or fathers before engaging in intercourse with men outside their immediate family circle. This practice was rooted in cultural norms and expectations regarding gender roles and propriety. Throughout the Bible, particularly in the Old Testament, we see examples of women deferring to male authority figures before interacting with men who were not part of their family. This deference was often seen as a sign of respect for their "head" and adherence to social norms rather than a reflection of women's capabilities or intelligence. For instance, in Genesis 24, Rebekah consults with her "head", including her father and brother, before agreeing to accompany Abraham's servant to meet Isaac. Similarly, in the New Testament, there are instances where women seek guidance or permission from their "heads" before engaging with men outside their immediate family.

[@ruthgoebel723]

You mean a woman cannot speak with a man who is not her husband? Creepy!

[@samanthabender]

I wanted my husband there so he could get in on the experience of the interview process with me :) It was new for him, whereas I had done it before. He didn't have to be there. And yes, conservative women can talk to other men of their own accord.

[@1Whipperin]

@@samanthabender What about Biblical women?

[@AnabaptistPerspectives]

Thank you for weighing in, Samantha. Yes. It is important to clarify that women can and should talk to other men of their own accord.

[@1Whipperin]

@@AnabaptistPerspectives Is that Biblical?

[@angelagabathuler9199]

😂😅😊😊👍👍👌👌👌👌