The 2 Faces Of Women (A Perfect Demonstration)

[@alexandergrace5350]

My personality is not well suited to KZbin. This is a platform that favours short videos that trigger strong emotions in the audience. The algorithm rewards content that validates the existing bias of the viewer and reduces complex ideas down to our basic tribalistic instincts. Fuck that. That’s not me. From all the feedback I have gotten, people specifically seek out my channel because they want information about dating, relationships, sexuality and female psychology but they are sick of all the rage bait and thinly disguised misogyny. They don’t want to hate women. They want the freedom to criticize negative female behaviour. They don’t want to blame everything on feminism. They want to understand the deeper biological and psychological roots of female mating choices. They don’t want to martyr themselves to singledom. They want a healthy relationship with a high-quality woman. If this describes you, you are exactly the person I make my videos for and I’m so glad you found my KZbin channel but I promise you, all the best stuff can be found on my Patreon. I want to break free from the pressures of clickbait so I can explain the full complexities of these topics with all of the appropriate depth and nuance. I want to create videos for high quality men who sincerely want to learn and improve. I can post these more in depth videos on Patreon and I’m so much happier. Switching my focus has brought me so much joy. If you’re broke, don’t stress - I’ll be posting clips and highlights from my Patreon multiple times a week on this channel for free. I hope it helps you! If you have $5 spare, I really hope you’ll join our thriving Patreon community where you’ll get access to a ton of exclusive content. I’m trying to do something different and break free from the mould of the KZbin Algorithm. I hope you’ll join me: www.patreon.com/alexandergrace

[@G31M1]

I hope more companies will sponsor your work because it's so precious!

[@bobsmithy9024]

Guys like Darius M and Taylor the Fiend clearly hate women. You are more analytical and less bitter. Lol

[@G31M1]

@@bobsmithy9024 I used to watch Better Bachelor every now and then but damn the dude gives me bitter vibes as well!

[@nez2598]

Brilliant article and encouraging response that you highlighted!

[@Mr.4AGE]

overweight bald dude is the same guy (Christian Bale) in both pictures in that meme

[@MessageinaBottleComments]

" Sexual harassment ain't nothing but ugly men trying to get some." Chris Rock

[@randomhuman2595]

Not really if a guy followed a girl home at 3am that would be harassment even if he was good looking

[@Vapourwear]

@@randomhuman2595intentionally obtuse, much?

[@soydansogukcesme470]

the funny part is, you dont need be even ugly.. if she thinks you are ugly or if she thinks your status is low.. she will call harassment.. so.. if you dont fit in her narative .. you are out.

[@peterfan8650]

The reason why women freak out if an ugly (or average) man approach them is that they are insulted - it's insinuating that he thinks she is on his level of attractiveness (in her logic, if she thinks he's ugly, then she thinks he thinks she's ugly too), and therefore attacking their inflated perception of themselves.

[@paulbentley1705]

Very good point my friend.

[@gavcat2382]

Spot on!

[@jstefa2]

"you are not pretty enough to be this obnoxious." try it. its hilarious :D you dont call them ugly. you still sat they are pretty. but it stings like hell and gives them a reality check. if you do it on a self absorbed 10 its glorious :D

[@derekboyt3383]

I don’t think, in this example, she believes he thinks she’s ugly because he’s approaching her. He wouldn’t approach her if he thinks she’s ugly. I believe it’s more likely that she’s insecure about someone seeing her with him and then she will be placed in a different social class.

[@xavierayayaell546]

Absolutely, and this is not widely discussed

[@rajakghosh6602]

The difference between harmless flirting and being called a creep depends on how hot the guy is.

[@mrdee2454]

With dating apps and social media giviny women access to billions of men. not even just looks anymore its looks, height and money the supply is so high now being attractive is less than 1% of dudes

[@WarlockX4]

Bingo...

[@alisaforster28691]

Ofc. Creepyness is a expression of fear of being graped. Its an evolutionary mechanism instilled long ago.if you look good enough for her you to smash that whole radar is turnes off.

[@Gunsight-One]

Being a particularly average looking dude I often wonder how I am percieved by the opposite sex. I'm not the best at picking up on subtle social queues so I often walk away from interactions with wahmen not knowing how I made her feel.

[@RobDaCajun]

@@Gunsight-One there are a ton of body language videos on KZbin for your to study to learn the ques. This is a necessity because they are so subtle. My biggest piece of advice is how helpful they act towards you. It’s a biological mating strategy for women to show how helpful a partner they will be if you pick them. Bear in mind the is a guideline not a rule. For example a waitress or saleswoman may be playing it up for a bigger tip or sale. That said if you feel a woman is being “really nice and helpful”. Then take your shot. You could be happily surprised on what will happen. Side note we men missed this a lot. Our significant others catch this immediately. That’s why for example your girlfriend gets mad at a waitress for hitting on you and you don’t realize it or can’t see it.

[@bluemidnight5926]

Nailed it with the main character syndrome. I feel like this is too many women nowadays. Happened to me just yesterday. Went to the ER and there was a female sitting across from me in my age range. I didn't look at her even once, but I can tell how old she was because the registration person talked to her in front of me. Anyway, I can feel her throwing energy in my direction. She would do things in her seat to catch attention, like listening to music at inappropriate volumes on her phone and singing. We're literally the only two people there and we're seated about 10 feet across from one another, which is basically face to face close. She doesn't have headphones either, so it's just music blaring from her phone and singing right in my face. At one point I got on my laptop and started writing with it, and she actually reacted by beginning to stomp one foot repeatedly. This went on for A WHILE. So now, there's no more music, and it's just the sound of me clicking away on a keyboard, and her foot hitting the ground. I can even catch how high she was raising her leg in my peripheral vision each stomp, that's how close we were to one another. I continued to mind my own business, then after a few minutes, I hear her let out a few deep sighs, again, not modest sounding, but as though she was throwing them in my direction, then she eventually gets on her phone and calls a friend. I heard her complaining that she was bored waiting at the ER, and she threw in a jab that the people in the city aren't very friendly. This is when I started to crack with laughter. I tried to mask it by looking down at my laptop and making it like I was interested in what I had going on, but I'm not sure if she bought it. I just found it funny how entitled women can get sometimes. They're like attention vampires. This girl was doing everything to get me to look at her, including stomping a single foot over and over again like a crazy person. In my experience, women who do these things only want the attention for their own validation, and NOT because they're actually interested in me, so I didn't want to fuel her ego by giving her the satisfaction. It's just funny how they engage in these behaviors to where it almost becomes like an SNL skit.

[@NeoZeta]

Yep. They come up with all sort of weird tactics to catch your attention. In cases such as this one, for the most part is not really for you, it's just for validation. That is not an environment where she wants to be approached, only confirmation that she's a catch.

[@impudentdomain]

the worse thing a man can do to a woman is ignore her. constant attention and validation is what they crave

[@tatianannar1065]

You have such a big ego if you think that woman wanted to catch your attention

[@bluemidnight5926]

@@tatianannar1065 Disagree. I literally said that I know they're doing it for themselves and NOT because they're interested in me. How does that feed my ego?

[@dubbcee1000]

@@tatianannar1065 the man literally said that most times that this happens that it's not genuine interest in him.

[@carljohnson6264]

I see an old man at the gym. He’s not good looking. He is old. Very old. He’s bald and his body is old. I use him as an example at the gym to ask girls about this very topic : creepiness. I know this man lives alone. He doesn’t talk unless spoken to. He walks the track and he looks around. No , he doesn’t stare, but he does look around. From what I know about him: this time at the gym is the only time he’s around other human beings. He is lonely. All the girls say he is a “creep” I always ask them why, and after they are done I ask them what they would think about him if they knew he was extremely isolated and lonely. They don’t care. He’s a creep. I’m so glad I’m not in a relationship with any of these females. THEY ARE THE CREEP!!!

[@MessageinaBottleComments]

Not only will an ugly man get penalized for completing the same behavior that an attractive man can get away with, but an attractive man can get away with behavior that _no man_ should be able to get away with. This explains why so many women find themselves in dangerous situations on dates. They assigned the halo effect to their attractive mate, who is the predator. And he may have had all kinds of red flags as a predator, but she didn't see them because he was attractive!

[@Yarblocosifilitico]

and yet we are the shallow ones...

[@bradblades4245]

Two of my friends were really attractive guys in HS... tall, good looking, athletic... and I learned very early in my life that not only could they get away with things that I couldnt, but they could get away with things that might get me arrested. You cant negotiate desire, gents.

[@ferget9111]

That's exactly why i don't feel sorry for them picking the bad boys that look attractive,he can have all the danger signs but she don't care because he attractive smh.

[@impudentdomain]

@@bradblades4245 Yup, our high school full back, total chad, he grabbed every girl in school by their ass. They all loved it and giggled. Can you imagine you or me doing that.

[@DavidSmith-mt7tb]

They love to talk about standards, but they don't actually have any. Standards are requirements you don't make exceptions for, but at the end of the day, many girls will compromise any of them if the guy is desirable enough.

[@nabilbth9726]

The problem with the concept of creepiness is that every action that would truly be a norm violation ALREADY has a name, like if he stalks he would be called a stalker if he touches women he is a harrasser if he did someting wrong you simply would describe the wrong behaviour like he talks to slow or holds too much eye contact. the term creepy is is proof that there was no real norm violation because again then you would just name it / describe it. creepy means i dont like your appearance that overshadows your behaviour and therefore gives it a bad vibe.

[@sifuhotman8595]

Spot on analysis. This deserves a pin.

[@maxmuller6730]

wow great breakdown 👍

[@nathanbraun2067]

women use meaningless words cuz they don't wanna be nailed down

[@Alisha0413]

I get what you’re saying but I think that creepiness is one of those things… people try to describe it as a lack of social calibration but I see it as someone who knows well fine what is acceptable but pushes boundaries and doesn’t care about making other people uncomfortable, and by uncomfortable I mean putting someone into a situation that it is hard to remove themselves from. I think there is usually some intention when it comes to creepiness

[@DTraiN5795]

@@Alisha0413 only problem with that which if you’ll think about you know people can do creepy things that you allowed bc it gave you butterflies and other anatomy issues. Stop the cap and let’s be totally real

[@social_sigma369]

I intentionally use terms usually used by females like "creepy" to describe certain women just to see the reaction of females. Very interesting. Most of what I get is "How"?

[@vorbis4860]

I was going to suggest exactly this. I used it once, saying, "If our genders were reversed, you'd get called a creeper." It was totally true. And it really worked, I must say. It got through to her.

[@tranngockha6562]

@@vorbis4860 that's kinda nice. Her owning up to it

[@KineticSymphony]

I can try to summarize it as this: 9/10 gigachad can do virtually anything shot of murder and get away with it, woman will have a smile on her face no matter what. 7/10 chad lite can get away with a lot, most jokes even dumb will be laughed at, PUA game works very well usually, but there are still limits. 5/10 normie, will be rejected often, though typically not very harshly (sorry I have a boyfriend type of rejection). PUA game can sort of work but it's still hit or miss, although in the 6/10 above average normie I'd say is when PUA has most value, enough to generate intrigue to makeup for the slight inferiority of your looks. And below 5/10... that's when rejection becomes harsh, when the word "creep" comes into play, and even when they try to send cops after you.

[@scottcoley1906]

It's their training. They're being trained to hate men in school and college and by single moms. Women who were raised in good homes and in a normal society (the US today isn't normal especially since feminism has been packed into t.v. and movies) don't get scared or offended if some regular guy talks to them.

[@ngythe1king]

The only way a below 5/10 can beat this evil system is to work on themselves and be successful for them. Then when they’re in their 30-40s chilling on their boat or traveling around the world, those same women that called them creeps will wish they were with them…but it’s not easy, it’s going to take a lot of work

[@varunv2584]

7.5-8.25 is high tier normie range

[@noyzmunky]

I won. I found a high quality woman 15 years ago after learning what one was with many low quality ones. I still love your content and recommend it to men still in the trenches. Great job.

[@BayouFrog]

All women have two faces.

[@GavinRobles-mw2ww]

Cause of make up

[@peripheralparadox4218]

Averting eye contact can also be a sign that she’s attracted to you but also shy.

[@paulbentley1705]

It also means she's not experienced.

[@StayFractalesque]

@@paulbentley1705 that's a negative?

[@paulbentley1705]

@@StayFractalesque No it's not, I'm just saying...

[@YS_Production]

I agree the behaviour on the right-hand side can be a good sign from a lot of women, she only may seem "creeped out" in this side by side comparison due to the contrast to the left-hand side. I disagree with Alexander on it being so clear she feels uncomfortable to the point the guy should leave her alone. Some people are very uncomfortable in general in life and for such a girl, she's never gonna act like the girl on the left, even with a guy she really, really likes.

[@Mike80528]

When all social constructs must align only to what *women* find acceptable, using derogatory terms to describe unaccepted behavior shames any non-feminine behavior. It's the misalignment of the social construct that is the issue. There's a major imbalance that women (as a whole) refuse to acknowledge.

[@PrinceRevolver]

I had a similar experience. An older gentleman in my area walked his dog early in the morning before work and he got labeled creepy.

[@darkoverlord31]

For walking a dog!???

[@saif9amar417]

@@darkoverlord31..Videos of women flirting with dogs spreading in the internet does not make them creepy.

[@kamsko5957]

@@darkoverlord31 If you're ugly you are creepy just by existing.

[@klopcodez]

Yes even riding a bike and tryifn to turn and women walking slow in the side walk and later looks back again and you tell them your going to the right turn or left kind you she's close to the turn yet walking skow af so you slow down and she looks back again....now I just tell then excuse me or I ride the bike at a high speed passed them when they take the while side walk...or ride on the grass as I pass fast no more time for bs

[@guntertorfs6486]

You can be attractive to a woman , but if you're too honest and direct ( in a positive way ) , or/ and don't play their ( vague ) seduction games , a lot of women will feel ' uncomfortable ' too.

[@saif9amar417]

Women consider honest, serious and righteous men most creepy.

[@guntertorfs6486]

@@saif9amar417 Not the better ones, but they are scarce. The same could be said about honest, serious and righteous men.Basically your right though.

[@brendDun]

You know something that would solve a lot of these issues for both women and men? If women approached men they were attracted to instead of waiting to be approached. Guys almost always have to be the ones to put themselves out there just by the nature of that he is more likely to be called "creepy". The same girl might think the way you came across was creepy one day, where as if you had met her on a different day she might not have. There is no consistency or any patterns men can really even discern, because there is no logic too it. If it become more of a cultural norm for woman to approach men then they wouldn't be approached by guys they weren't interested in all the time and the men wouldn't have to be worried about being called creepy when they most likely just have pretty innocent intentions.

[@ray076NL]

Theyd all approach the same 20% of men constantly, but yeah, and they DO approach those men or make themself available enough to.get.approached by them.

[@brendDun]

@@ray076NL That's a good point, haha

[@-haclong2366]

@@ray076NL the same 1% of guys, maybe 2% if we count the bottom 1% of females.

[@KyleReeseCel2029]

The very fat or very ugly chicks would start trying to pick up normies and get rejected. Then they would stop approaching after 2 tries. Wouldnt work out.

[@ferget9111]

@@ray076NL That's exactly why i don't feel sorry for them picking the bad boys that look attractive,he can have all the danger signs but she don't care because he attractive smh..

[@MultiGERmann]

Feminism is not about men and women. Also not about equality. It's about women only.

[@blueshoes5145]

Well..that’s the point ain’t it. The word itself has ‘fem’ in it, so it is safe to assume it is related to women. Men back then had no need for rights to be given to them. They already had them.

[@The-Man-On-The-Mountain]

16:50 That is the typical projection. She thinks men behave like that when they get caught because that's what women do. Men don't claim to be victims when they get caught, they run and hide. It's women who do that, because it's easy for them, because the entire society supports and rewards that behaviour, that total lack of accountability. For instance: if she cheats, it's his fault. So that comment is pure projection. Men don't behave like that AT ALL when they get caught. Men can come up with the weirdest and absurd excuses, but they don't play the victim card. That comment goes to show you how biased and ignorant many women are, because they don't need to be aware or empathetic, because the entire society tells them that they are victims by default, ALWAYS, so the possibility that she is the perpetrator, or even that she is wrong, is dismissed, unacceptable. If someone grows up, hearing how stunning and brave they are all the time, no matter what they do, that person probably is going to be a horrendous human being, a sociopath, and extremely narcissistic.

[@danielschiman767]

True. I would argue though, liberal/leftist men do behave like that, they do claim to be victims very often. Although, they don't really count as men. So thats that.

[@StrangeAttractor]

Flirty guy is American Psycho lol... because that's the great irony here. Women are most attracted to guys with dark triad traits, the guys most likely to mess up their lives and devastate them emotionally (with an elevated risk of physical violence as well). Woman, know thyself....

[@balwgar92]

I thought the irony was that both photos are the same actor

[@JasonFiske]

They’re both photos of Christian Bale.

[@killerclown-df9lz]

Because of women, we’re living in a *winner takes all* kind of world

[@accurategamer7085]

This wasn't a unsafe creep vibe she got, if she did she would leave not him. This was a shatter to her ego that a guy wasn't talking to her and all over her which she later had to come back to the internet to restore her ego by shaming the guy and calling him a creep.

[@vanessaloermans9563]

Thankyou for bringing this matter to light Alex. Its important to note that this is not just a feministic viewpoint or behaviour- most women behave this way. Most women who didnt have male siblings or cousins or strong male role models behave this way and get caught in this mindset. I had all brothers and remember girls who wanted to date my brothers would be asking me to line them up on dates one minute and complaining they were a creep the next if they were rejected.

[@parrotshootist3004]

Feminists created that though. They set out to destroy the family. It's public record and in the material of their studies. So it can't be separated from being raised with out males.

[@parrotshootist3004]

Can't even type a supported comment because shadow bans.

[@vanessaloermans9563]

@@parrotshootist3004 absolutely agree- feminists have caused a massive pivotal societal change where men have been removed from the equation and access to children restricted!....by limiting male influence in a young females life feminist views will take hold. If strong male influence is present it creates a massive shift.

[@parrotshootist3004]

@@vanessaloermans9563 feminist, corrosive humanist views will take hold with dad there. They start it from pre school. They just can't get the more radical stuff into them so easily. It's Fabian gradualism, social engineering.

[@blynkers1411]

Why are men so sensitive about being called creepy?! Why are women so sensitive about being called bossy? Because it is a description which directly attacks what "self-esteem" thinking creates within the respective persons. It suggests that the lies we tell ourselves about ourselves are actually lies. P.S. Having two faces is called "hypocrisy". And everyone (everyone!) is a hypocrite quite a bit more often than we'd like to admit (it's another form of lying). Just watch 97% of drivers when they realize that a cop just pulled on to the road with them.

[@kamsko5957]

If you're really unlucky, as a man you can get a fine or go to jail in that situation, as a woman you only get a bad day.

[@adamboskri8790]

Let’s we’ve got this guy who’s a 6.5, if he tries to cold approach a woman, he will surely get rejected. But the same guy can get that same girl if not cold approached. Women will accept being cold approached by a 8/9 because if she’s gonna “degrade” herself by accepting, she wants to be with a very attractive guy in compensation. But if you’re the average guy you’ll need a setting and a reason for talking to her, say colleagues, or you both at this association, or you’r students in the same class. That doesn’t guarantee anything, but you won’t be seen as that big of a creep. Tldr : Not all of us can cold approach but that’s Ok there are other ways.

[@bobsmithy9024]

I would posit 98 percent of women don't want any man to cold approach them. Cold approach is unsolicited so women have zero reason to indulge the man's interest regardless of his looks.

[@daemok4752]

Match that with the tendency of women to not be straightforward when they are interested, only using subtle signs to show her interest also with fact that only 8,9 or 10 are good looking and everything below 8 for a man is considered ugly then the overestimation by women of their own se.xual market value and you end up in a big shitty dating mess

[@azorahai5158]

a rl 6,5 is prob better than what a 8 is in your book . 6,5 is gettin halos left and rigt and for male still very rare , its not even close to averge

[@limon2796]

You are completely missing what cold approach is about lol, most women don’t want to stop what they are doing to have some random guy come talk to them, but if the guy has game and demonstrates enough value in how he acts then he can get away with being below average in looks.

[@daemok4752]

@@limon2796 you got higher chances of ending with an harassment complaint than getting her number if you are below average, but of course you have a small chance, just like if you play russian roulette with 5 bullets in a revolver, you have a chance so will you risk it? To be honest you are speaking out of your ass here, I can tell you form my own experience as someone below 5, even just saying "hi" to be polite or "good morning" has women turned off to the point it's visible, and I am not even trying to strike a conversation about the weather lol and i am talking about women 20 to 35 here as someone in that group range. I am certainly not the only one who experienced this kind of stuff. The real truth is that you need to be at the right place, at the right time and be the right guy to have a real chance as even the Chads only have 20 to 30 % success.

[@enigmaticspirit1]

Creepy = lower Sexual Market Value.

[@lostallmymoney2082]

More importantly, Creepy = call the cops.

[@JonathanBaltzly]

Okay I've been sharing this with some people, but I'm only telling the guys about this video. I genuinely find this very interesting, so I want to hear multiple opinions. Here is paraphrase if initial response from a mid 30s single mother: Masculinity and male egos tend to be quite fragile. Someone once explained the main difference between men and women like this: men fear being mocked, while women fear men might harm them physically if they don't comply. It's a significant contrast. So, if I occasionally hurt a man's feelings because I felt uneasy... well, it could be much worse. I don't know if she's read the comments, but it's not like men don't realize women have a legitimate fear of danger. I've actually been trying to improve, and I'm attempting to make her see it from the perspective of the guy.

[@RPMentorTokyoChannel]

Regarding the topic of creepiness-though, a bit more serious-I looked into some studies on s. harassment, and female flight attendants, when it came to acts by captains and baggage holders, tended to consider acts in the case of the latter as s. harassment.

[@SunFlower-jr2qh]

😅😁 it’s ‘cause the men should know their SMV

[@wickedwildhog5894]

I tried googeling it, no luck. You don't happen to have a link perhaps?

[@RPMentorTokyoChannel]

@@wickedwildhog5894 There is a pinned comment on a video of mine called Is It Harassment When Chad Does It? In that comment, I put all the references I used for the video.

[@rey_nemaattori]

'creepy' triggers men cuz a creepy label can destroy his career, family and life without due process (especially these days) and men can't stop doing creepy things because men aren't the judges determining what's creepy or not, therefore we lack the feedback loop that allows us to determine when we're creepy until it's already too late. It's like asking women not to act like witches back in Medieval times, there isn't a specific set of behaviours determined to avoid. Any knowledge of medicinal plants, owning a cat, living in a cabin in the woods, not dying form some disease or even rubbing the wrong person the wrong way could get you a witches trial, at which point it doesn't matter whether you're found guilty or not: your life would be over anyway(usually in the literal sense). Edit: The comment 'Creeps love to be victims when they're caught' kinda shines a new light on the Amber Heards of the world...

[@MrHDProd]

9 things to quit for all Strong Men: 1. Caring about what others think 2. Not believing in yourself 3. Not experimenting different ideas / solutions for problems (life&business) 4. Not prioritizing your health 5. Wasting your precious time 6. Wanting something (instead write a plan and work towards it) 7. Chasing meaningless relationships 8. Wasting time by scrolling social media 9. Quitting addictions for good (if you have any - consider stopping it as it makes you mentally weak + affects your confidence and all other areas of your life!) 🚀 Take it easy and I hope you found one thing helpful in this list 💯☝️

[@oscaraurelio8869]

Some say one need 66 days to build a habit, good or bad. It may take time, but step by step, one can make it through this entire list 👍

[@kaldemvor]

An addiction is always a mask for something else. Until that "something else" is dealt with, addiction will always be a problem.

[@JEAGERlST]

Imo I think the women on reddit that were hating on the man in the story was cause they weren't reading the post in an analytical way but as if it was more of a text message from a friend.

[@jonsnowight9510]

What would that have to do with anything? The situations and actions were the same, regardless of who conveyed the information or how.

[@horsthorstmann2329]

04:00 Look at this picture. Its two times Christian Bale. One time slim and young, next picture another role, older and chubby.

[@phillip4854]

The flirting Guy and the Sexual harassment guy are both Christian Bale. Just shows how different sides of the coin one can be, and how a simple fact that she liking you can have on any interaction between both sexes.

[@dinocarosi4303]

Yes, agree. I don't think Alexander picked up on them both being him but it goes even further to his point.

[@DivineLogos]

Man, that story about the "creep" was so well thought out😂

[@nickst0ne]

I correctly predicted a split between positive and negative reactions. But I clearly did not expect that one comment (*) would be so on point and that it would garner the most support. (*) btw, because 1 (only 1) comment is accurate and supported, doesn't mean that many feminists could and would accurately perceive the situation by themselves. One of them could. Yay! A few hundred millions more to go!

[@Yarblocosifilitico]

Basically, we have to be detectives.

[@WonZZY2003]

To protect yourself it's highly necessary to study women's nature and dark psychology.

[@Ceolskog]

They missed the opportunity to say "Batman vs Fatman".

[@SunFlower-jr2qh]

😂😂

[@Vapourwear]

Now all I can hear is”…I’m Fatman…..”

[@Mr.Jasaw13]

Alex's analysis here is so bloody spot on, thank you man

[@Rayzorbladez]

The flirting guy is the same guy as the harasser guy. It's Christian Bale

[@G31M1]

That's the point my dude

[@Rayzorbladez]

@@G31M1 that's my dude, the point

[@natenowak2227]

@@Rayzorbladez point thats my, the dude

[@TheNaturalLawInstitute]

Women use the word single term 'creepy', and men use a series of words like 'strange', 'off', 'weird', 'ugly', 'disgusting', 'trashy' etc and ... so men are just using precise language to describe what we find offputting (FACTS), where women just describe their feeling of offputting "creepy" (FEELINGS). Reals vs Feels ... always.

[@NGMonocrom]

Yeah.... Uncomfortable smile vs. genuine smile. Guys need to learn to tell the difference.

[@G31M1]

I could definitely tell that she didn't seem very confident in the right clip which in turn would have made me uncomfortable because I would hate to create these situations for women.

[@strategicthinker8899]

No, women need to be more direct. Many guys can't tell, unfortunately.

[@G31M1]

The comment from shestammie surprised me. Shout out to her!

[@thegivpmn9565]

Dude, you take all the points which men face in modern society and present them so rationally, with confidence. Tbh, i wouldn't be able to discuss such things without fear of being judged by society/women. Bravo!

[@jacasoasheland6815]

I was socially awkward in high school, certain girls gave me the nickname "Creeper". Every time they'd refer to me, I'd be "Creeper". But it all feels so unfair. For the rest of my life I'm battling a complex thinking that every time I'm interacting with women, I'm scaring them. I'm ashamed every time I talk to women & I've never done anything bad to them.

[@PipoZePoulp]

Regarding the reddit post; yeah, being called creepy got his attention. That's just one step removed from facing grape accusation - before the court of public opinion. In this day and age, the sensible move is to keep recording the interaction and leave. At home, note the day and event, and archive the video for safe keeping.

[@JekyllHyde86]

Love these discussions.

[@swcomer]

Your point is very valid, but I know quite a few women that would really go for the guy on the right.

[@TheInsomniaddict]

Problem with the first video is that if you didn't know the girl it could just be her personality to be a bit nervous. One job from years ago, I found out after I left that everyone liked me at the job except this one girl. She told some guys I know that she thought I was the creepiest person there. Why? When we first talked she said she was always ignored by everyone, so I decided to give her a bit of attention each day. Something like staring at her and waiting for her to catch me. She'd laugh and tell me to stop it, I'd wave and go back to whatever I was doing. I talked with her after this as well and nothing was said, conversation didn't seem awkward although we kept things largely impersonal. To be fair she was like a decade younger than me. While initially interested I didn't expect it to go anywhere and the approach was meant as friendly. Once I knew her age I decided against trying but I remained friendly because I generally prefer to be on good terms with my coworkers. So moral of the story: you could be building up some rapport, get laughs and conversation from someone who looks comfortable and still be seen as a creep.

[@DefinitelyNotAMachineCultist]

Lessons learned: 1) Avoid attempting to _build rapport_ with female coworkers. If you run into someone with some kind of BPD or neuroticism, you're one mood swing away from _creative reinterpretation_ of past interactions for god only knows what reason. 2) Always go for professionalism and respect with anyone at work (male or female) unless it's a dude you know outside of work. 3) Some people are lonely and ignored for a reason. If you got along with everyone except her, and she never seemed close to anyone, what are the odds someone else had a similar experience? Some people even have weird issues where they feel a need to push people away _specifically because they feel mutually close._ 4) Unless you want to play unpaid therapist, boundaries trump everything in 99.9% of relationships.

[@TheInsomniaddict]

@@DefinitelyNotAMachineCultist Agreed, although as someone who has generally been the one pushed away, I'm intimately familiar with wanting some kind of connection. I've spent a few years since and realized that doesn't go both ways. Still, I really hate to be the one leaving the other person out in the cold like that. My problem, though.

[@DefinitelyNotAMachineCultist]

@@TheInsomniaddict You seem like a good person, all the more reason to be careful with people. Lots of people start out trying to overdeliver in their relationships and be the nice guy, then as soon as they run into someone that doesn't reciprocate, they become resentful and bitter wretches. Better to be as nice as you can afford to be, while assuming the other person won't reciprocate. I kind of wish people didn't take it a step further and try to screw you over for _not_ being a dick though. But if people are gonna assume the worst, best to cover your rear first. It's stuff like this that makes regular people anti-social.

[@TheInsomniaddict]

@@DefinitelyNotAMachineCultist You're more on the money than I wish you were. I would rather prefer to be the asshole in this situation.

[@robertfindley921]

I agree with your guest. It seems to me the woman on the right hasn't made up her mind. She smiles at the guy a couple of times. I've seen uncomfortable women many many times in my life. You'll never see a smile. Complements will only make the situation worse as it sets off alarm bells in their mind. Their face will be crunched up like they just smelled something horrible.

[@More_Row]

Indeed.

[@rymreaper]

This video was uplifting , not everything is doomed.

[@000CloudStrife]

This is one reason Trudeau and Newsom get away with crap. Literally some of my friends said they voted for them because they were the cutest candidates.

[@michaelsantangelo6192]

This past year, I experienced 2 times when women were creepy. I went to a concert wearing sweatpants. A woman I didn't know came up behind me, put her hand down the back of my pants, pulled my pants outward and snapped them back on my ass. Then she stood REALLY close to me on my side. I looked over at her and she gave me the "I'm too good for you, eyes straight ahead" look. I just walked away. Next incident: Some woman that just moved into my building introduced herself to me one day. We talked for literally like 3 minutes. I found her off-putting. A few nights later, she comes down knocking on my door at 4:45am on a weeknight. I opened my door. She was drunk off her ass and just said, "Do you want to watch me play the fiddle?" I said not at 4 am. She started giving me attitude. I shut the door in her face. I never mentioned anything to the landlord. But some time later, the landlord was here looking at my stove and just said to me that she's kicking that girl out due to multiple complaints. Imagine knocking on a stranger's door at that hour to literally ask for attention. And imagine being kicked out of your building for behavior like that as a grown ass person. Imagine I, as a guy, had done that.

[@timtarbet4594]

This actually restored my faith in women, just a little bit. Thanks for that.

[@jemand8462]

to me the most astonishing thing about this video is that "unsafe" means "talking to an ugly guy" and is used synonymously by girls nowadays. As if every ugly guy is a rapist and every hot guy isn't

[@dubbcee1000]

The thing is, generally speaking, women view any unattractive man that isn't giving her free resources and attention as subhuman.

[@gleefulme9617]

The same thing happens to women. Women who are good looking are given many more breaks than less attractive females.

[@MostlyBuicks]

"Acting beyond your station" Very well put.

[@smart-brian]

"The way she's fidgeting and looking away" proceeds to show video of both girls doing the exact same thing. Left girl plays with necklace and looks left. Right girl plays with necklace and looks right.

[@MrCovi2955]

Dude here: Gotta agree to disagree with both sides here. Alexander is completely right. Creepy is used to de-person people for being ugly or awkward. Creepy has the connotation that there's "something dangerously wrong" with someone. And not being able to read social cues or being bald and overweight doesn't mean that. So the term is weaponized as a way to "fend off" the invisible ones. HOWEVER, guest is also right. There are sociopaths and psychopaths out there. Women do get r*ped. And those men can put off "creepy" vibes. I think the problem is that women are as bad at reading the difference between a r*pist and a kind fat guy as men are at reading the difference between "I'm into you" and "I feel super unsafe, I'm just being polite, stop reading my smiles and eye contact as flirting."

[@QuantumCat76]

Yep. 100%

[@saurabhvaishnav2038]

In this day and age, a man will need to give enough proofs that he isn't doing anything wrong and even if he does it he will still be considered bad for gathering proof as he can make the accusers look bad. When you make a rude comment and get humiliated in return you can go to social platforms and paint a guy in bad light... Well that's called being a woman these days. Now the time is changing and those women can't find approval of their act anywhere and they are bitter about it.

[@TheKerberos84]

I did not expect that outcome. It proofs in some way that only the loudest voices get heard. What are usually radical or extreme.

[@impudentdomain]

Fascinating, Alex, we would love to see more content like this. More concrete evidence of double standards and the like.

[@avoidantbehavior]

3:05 not only the exact same line. The exact same guy, Christian Bale.

[@dinocarosi4303]

That's how good of an actor he is... He fooled Alexander 😏

[@anamateurelf610]

it's not necessarily just that he's better looking though. Because the level of creep vibes a woman will feel from a man isn't just about how he looks, it's also the signals she is sending, and whether he seems to be reacting to them or ignoring them. Story time: I was reading in a corner in gym class (this was high-school, I don't get out much😅) and a random guy sat down next to me and started asking questions about my book, he was relatively good looking, as I recall, I just wasn't interested. (as I said: I was reading.) I was curt, brusque even, I just wanted to be left alone with my book. and but he just kept talking to me and I remember thinking to myself 'why is this creep still talking to me?' it wasn't his fault really, and eventually he got the hint and left. when I got home and told the story to my family they teased me, saying he was just trying to flirt and I had been quite rude actually. but that is neither here nor there. The point is: the fact that he came off as creepy had nothing to do with how he looked, and everything to do with the fact that he kept talking to me despite my obvious disinterest. long story short the girl thinks she's giving off stronger signals than she really is and when the guy fails to react the way she wants/expects, it can come off as deliberately ignoring them. and I think it's fair to say that if you *do* notice that the other person is uncomfortable but you continue to hit on them regardless . . . well, that's a creep move no matter how hot you are. (and it's just as creepy when it's a girl coming onto a disinterested guy, it's just a different dynamic of creepiness, so don't come at me with that nonsense.) Bad behavior is bad behavior no matter who's doing it.

[@joaquin67]

That's pretty rare though, but I get what you're saying. From personal experience, I've fluctuated a couple of times in weight during my life and the moments I had lost the weight I noticed that women were a lot more forgiving if I fumbled somehow either through my words, actions, body language, etc. When I was a bigger guy, if my conversation wasn't perfect, I would get rejected at any little slipup. But I get what you mean, you're probably one of the uncommon women who know when someone is behaving negatively. Behavior definitely can be creepy, but being attractive gives anyone a lot more leeway in making mistakes for most people. Hence why it's called pretty privilege.

[@TheHoth1]

It is the consistency of inconsistency of some women made them dangerous to be around. Depends on if they feel attracted to you or not, they could either accept your compliments or call you a pervert. I have learnt a few tricks from the corporate world. Never ever be alone anywhere with a female coworker especially if you are higher up. Imagine her name is Amber Heard and you will know what to do;)

[@thor9418]

Your story was so brilliant, it got a 50/50 approval/disapproval. Great job.

[@megret1808]

Women know within 0.3 seconds if she likes you or not. I’ve been told this by women

[@wickedwildhog5894]

Really? This surprises me. I have often been told that men are more like switches and women like volume knobs.

[@xfreeman86]

3:24 "exact same line" yeah, and exact same guy too: Christian Bale

[@thrrax]

Same old saying: if you holler at her from a Bentley, it's flirting; if you holler from a skateboard, it's harassment.

[@tylertoussaint2463]

You guys honestly can't see the difference between these two expressions shes makes at the start? Left versus Right: Holds eye contact versus avoidant, maintains smile versus drops immediately, leans in nervous excitemnet versus retreats nervous uncomfortable, looks out with excitement versus looks down and away with fear. It's subtle, yeah, just when you put all of it together it's not that subtle. Maybe I'm sensitve to this, however, these are completely different reactions. The real difficulty is picking up on this in real time, especially in a noisy environment. It doesn't help that on the right, she is masking her disgust with the smile, like that's what is really going on here.

[@Bobby_101]

Wow, what a beautiful plot twist at the end.

[@sifumode9460]

What's unsettling about this is not just the subtlety of the difference. Yes, there are observable differences and yes, they are subtle. BUT, you have to keep in mind, these are total opposite ends of the spectrum. Now, what if we were comparing uncomfortable to hard-to-get?

[@robertfindley921]

I agree with Alex. In almost all cases it's completely inappropriate to associate a feeling you have with a character flaw in the other person. Women spend crazy amounts of money and time displaying their bodies and trying to make themselves look alluring, but then somehow expect only handsome men to notice or comment. I've learned to look away, or change my path to avoid them. I slow down or speed up, change the door I was going to enter/exit, and avoid going up stairs anywhere behind them. All to avoid seeing their uncomfortable body language or their glare.

[@JacobFury]

that top comment made me feel so good. Kudos to this woman, there is a chance for the world.

[@m.s.9744]

Your analysis is spot on 👍

[@lukewood2662]

The modern use of "creepy" or "creep" is not shaming, it's defamation, it's immediately dangerous to the man depending on who's nearby. People nearby will probably get really hostile with him, simps nearby might get violent, women nearby might get loud as if calling people to physically remove him from there. It's really extreme and men should avoid approaching or talking to women they don't know in certain scenarios(if you don't have a ton of friends around as witnesses for example) for this reason alone.

[@dedeborya9015]

If you are an average bloke / double hex if you are short - there is absolutely no reason to talk to women. Just opt out of it. If they want you - they will initiate. And guess what. They by en large - they wont. How should you treat women? *EXACTLY* as they treat the average guy - invisible, transactional, utilitarian & inconsequential.

[@pragueexpat5106]

well put!

[@bubachkobubachkov5519]

I do nor find myself ugly...but being rejected every time, it seems women consider me a "creepy ugly guy". Which makes me sad. Also stopped trying to speak to women now. I feel a bit like the Joker 2019 :(

[@derekboyt3383]

Saying that a person is creepy (men or women) is a projection and inappropriate.

[@9ththunder90]

@alexandergrace Shouldn’t the phrase be “men who are perceived as ugly” as opposed to “men who are ugly”? I find the way you assert this phrase slightly ironic seeing as in the video, you encourage people to take adequate ownership of their perceptions of other people, and ensure that this is reflected through their use of language (I.e. by speaking in a way where the observer is positioned as the active agent). Since I myself, favour this principle, I just wondered whether you’d agree with me pointing out that (similar to your proposition that men aren’t fundamentally creepy)…men/people also aren’t fundamentally ugly either? If you happen to agree then I’d encourage you to consider using another expression in future, since dispensing the term ugly just seems incongruent with the core of what you’re debating in this video (Thanks you for the content btw).

[@redknight6077]

We were convinced through years of drilling that beauty is subjective. Maybe it is but what if it isn't?

[@nathanrobertsofficial1524]

That was so good! Honestly really encouraging.

[@alesul2007]

I work as a security guard at a local supermarket and the staff is mostly female with a few guys. One of the managers is a very good looking man and 5 female managers. The type of stuff he tells the female staff is mind boggling sexist and harassing in my view as a man but none of the women are bothered and they encourage him even though they are all married because he is very handsome and flirtatious. Meanwhile I'm wondering how the hell does he still have a job.

[@aarongraham9424]

That Grey guy from the 50 shades of grey movies was absolutely creepy.. but women love it.. its almost emotional porn.. Your behaviors have almost nothing to do with whether you are perceived as creepy by women.. Power, looks, and money have much more to do with it.

[@Royster931]

A number of years ago feminist Marieke Hardy ( on the ABC's Book show) used the term "Sex Pest" in regard to a man she encountered. What an offensive put down, similar to "Creep". This sort of language is counter productive.

[@enazzz3]

Where can we find the original flirting versus felt unsafe video?

[@derekboyt3383]

The women on the right was uncomfortable but it’s hard to say why she was uncomfortable. Context is important. She could be uncomfortable because she’s waiting on another man, possibly she’s isolated, maybe she has trauma that is being triggered, she may like you but doesn’t feel prepared, OR maybe it’s the guy. I could come up with many reasons why she’s uncomfortable but I prefer not to make assumptions.

[@homeslice8819]

My teen son IS that devastatingly handsome guy whose social cues turn woman completely off. Leave it to girls to react that way.

[@-haclong2366]

People are naturally attracted to themselves and he's 50% you, plus he's 50% of the man you found attractive enough to get you pregnant. This doesn't mean that he's actually handsome, it just means that all the things you find attractive manifested themselves in him. It could also be that the vast majority of women would find both a male you and your partner unattractive.

[@Chris-0113]

My mom says I'm a catch too!

[@MikeG82]

parents always overrate their kids a male coworker of mine said his daughter was the best looking girl at her school, while she was at least 50 lbs overweight

[@homeslice8819]

Okay, when I say my son is "...devastating handsome...," I mean that virtually everyone that lays eyes on him either murmurs or says out loud that he should be a model. He's, like, beautiful. Carbon copy of Chris Hemsworth, golden flowing past should length hair, green eyes and muscles.

[@MikeG82]

@@homeslice8819 maybe but my point still stands ask a high school coach the worst part about their job, it's the parents every parent thinks their kid should be the star even when their kid is sitting the bench and isn't good enough to start

[@NathanHedglin]

You wonder why attractive serial killers were so successful

[@blackups__6554]

If those videos weren’t put side by side, then it would hard to differentiate. It’s like men have to walk on egg shells not hurt a woman’s feelings.

[@manoman0]

Not only the same line, also the same guy! Brilliant!

[@Rrkeiel]

I heard story of blind man working out on gym, some woman stand before him in her outfit when you can see everything and call him out for watching her, he told her that he is blind but she didn't care and go for security. When security came she showed his blind id card or how it's called but that security guy told him that it's ok he is blind but he can't staring anyway xD so ....

[@scotterickson6332]

Clip of "Flirting Vs. Uncomfortable Woman": I disagree that this clip would be an average or realistic representation of what a woman would act like: flirting vs. uncomfortable. For example, the uncomfortable woman may give her first name, but she would NEVER utter her first and last name, let alone her full 3 names. The uncomfortable woman playing-with her hair, and fidgeting with her pendant? In my experience, (truly) uncomfortable woman don't do that. Unless a man who she IS interested in, is standing nearby watching, and she uses this interaction with an unattractive man, to get the attractive mans interest.

[@fabianpascalabt6353]

Im feelin it. Yesterday I was at McDonalds getting food, and just randomly these girls sayin to me: "why are you looking at me like that" Idk just looking around dont mind my business. And after that they actively started talking with me. Makes me think whos creeped out after all.

[@justinc5151]

That Reddit write up was amazing

[@James-bw4np]

6:30 I think there was something you missed in this video as well, it wasn't just the looks of the guy but also the social presentation he puts forward including grooming, clothing selection ("dressed inappropriately" she said), and signs of income status ("a nice watch"). Those are things that don't usually matter to a masculine frame of mind because men have had to do the dirty jobs in society and that lends men to be less worried about presentation if we are in our work cloths. Just a side note. Great video and keep up the good work!

[@luissampayo4310]

The fact that the same woman is to have the same verbal response and to have an authentic emotional reaction. makes me raise questions.

[@BarbaraA.MertzRN-CCRN]

Good discussion! I encourage you do more like this.

[@FlamingoSandwich]

what i love is that both of the pictures are of Christian Bale and the the one on the left looks like its him from American Psyco or Batman Begins and the one of the right looks like its him when he was gaining the weight for Vice but it just goes to show that like that the diffence between flirting and Sexual Harassment is how attractive the women find the guy even the same guy lol!

[@Mike80528]

I think this post made it to the top page (I seem to recall it) which would bias the results well beyond the Feminist group you targeted. I would see if that person commonly posts to that group.

[@strategic1710]

That story sounds like the guy took his dog to the park, took a few photos, and because he didn’t immediately pay attention to the strange crazy lady she got triggered and started barking orders and name calling. Half that story is just her judgmental attitude.

[@vonniesmind2084]

I believe guys get called creepy and females get called crazy...