The Antlers - Kettering (Official Audio)

"Kettering" from the album Hospice by The Antlers
Lyrics: I wish that I had known in that first minute we met, the unpayable debt that I owed you. Because you’d been abused by the bone that refused you, and you hired me to make up for that. Walking in that room when you had tubes in your arms, those singing morphine alarms out of tune kept you sleeping and even, and I didn’t believe them when they called you a hurricane thunderclap.
When I was checking vitals I suggested a smile. You didn’t talk for awhile, you were freezing. You said you hated my tone, it made you feel so alone, and so you told me I ought to be leaving. But something kept me standing by that hospital bed, I should have quit, but instead I took care of you. You made me sleep and uneven, and I didn’t believe them when they told me that there was no saving you.

[@Aethrin]

I feel like the reason that people that have gone through intense pain like songs like this isn't because [we] like the sadness, but that it gives the validity of our hurt something life often doesn't.

[@akatsunew]

Omg that so true thx for that ne way to see things

[@pedromarin7817]

I feel like nobody asked, just heard it in a movie

[@paingothic]

Te extraño Dante 😭😺

[@felixmayfield6528]

Your comment is surprisingly neglected for something that is completely true. It's called Catharsis. Listening to a sad song when you're sad, the relief you feel isn't like schadenfreude, a feeling of enjoying someone else's pain. It's Catharsis. You don't even necessarily enjoy it, but you relate, you feel that pain and it's reassuring. Crying is Cathartic, it's not being pleased or admitting wrongdoing, it's just releasing emotion in a way you understand. Catharsis is really rather beautiful. You understand a pain and relate it to your own, and that's okay, we're all allowed to feel sad, and it's very reassuring that other people sometimes feel that way too.

[@zarieluwu128]

@@pedromarin7817 what was the movie

[@Toozip09]

My daddy passed away December 1 2018. Never thought a man that strong could be lost to cancer. He fought and gave his all to his family/children til his last breath. Forever my superhero. ❤ Thank you daddy.

[@pauline.590]

I wish you and you’re Family the best , what a strong man ❤️

[@bklydesign]

I wish that I had known in That first minute we met The unpayable debt That I owed you Because you'd been abused By the bone that refused you And you hired me To make up for that Walking in that room when you had tubes in your arms, those singing morphine alarms out of tune They had you sleeping and eating And I didn't believe them When they called you A hurricane thundercloud When I was checking vitals I suggested a smile You didn't talk for a while You were freezing You said you hated my tone It made you feel so alone So you told me I had to be leaving But something kept me standing By that hospital bed I should have quit but instead I took care of you You made me sleep all uneven And I didn't believe them When they told me that there Was no saving you

[@vivipeach2745]

Such a bitter exchange... How would either know what to say in that moment..

[@shebrnb]

@@vivipeach2745 ❤️❤️❤️

[@jonasswint1]

Boy that abused you**

[@waldokitty3533]

​@@jonasswint1 I believe it's bone. She has bone cancer.

[@Mammongus]

​@@jonasswint1 it's bone

[@POLDRO]

Don't picture yourself flying into the dark. Picture yourself flying among the stars, through cosmos.

[@peterhaha8183]

Where we can be truly alone with our future.

[@Rlee629]

"This song reminds me of my fight with dialysis, it drained me took my energy and many people walked out of my life worried that I might not survive and it made me depressed I even felt like stopping treatment,man I really had the blues it's hard when life deals you unfortunate hands and your support system if any is slim to null but somehow my faith in God got me through! And a year and a half later I got a donor kidney & pancreas 🙏🏾 life is real and short but every second is worth living even the bad times.. take it from a man who survived graveyard conditions keep fighting, keep loving and for the believers keep the faith! God bless

[@phonglu7780]

When I first listened to this songs many yeara ago, I wasn’t feel connected. Until recently when I listen to it again. It made me remember my mom, who passed two years ago during covid due to cirrhosis. We were in two different continents, and I couldn’t visit her due to lockdown in both countries. Her liver was failing, and she could no longer speak due to toxin buildup in the brain. We were on videocall, and she gave me a smile when she saw me and my baby daughter who she wished to meet. My heart ached, and I bursted into tears when I realized there was no saving her.

[@Fukthasystem]

♥️ 🙏🏽 ✝️

[@PeepingUkulele]

I’m so sorry

[@Weirdiohw]

a few years ago i talked to a girl on whisper (an anonymous app). she told me she had bipolar disorder and she sent me pictures of her cuts, she had cut herself all over her body. her arms, legs and chest. i cant remember exactly what she said, but she told me to listen to this song. i saw a post on yt that said ''recommend me some sad songs'' and i remembered this song, i couldnt come up with the name but after around an hour and a half i googled ''i walked in the room and you had tubes in your arms'', and finally i found it. idk why i wrote this but i felt like i had to. thanks for reading. i still think about her to this day.

[@LiuLoki]

wow

[@peacefullyspeaking]

You know how to find her? I hope she is okayy🥺🥺🥺

[@modestferala1488]

My favourite ever music/soundtrack/song ever

[@juandavidoliverossalazar8647]

English is not my native language, so i didn't quite understood the lyrics the first time i heard this song, long time ago. Now that i've listened to this again, with better knowledge of the language, this song became 10 times harder to listen, but 10000000 times better. Thank you for this.

[@wolforama13]

Juan, I hope you've listened to this whole album at this point. Such a beautiful and sad story.

[@benjaminsalvatierra1815]

@@wolforama13 onm to listen to it 🏃

[@crisptomato9495]

Bruh English is my mother tongue and even idk what he’s saying lol. Dw it’s not your language skills it’s the enunciation.

[@vipalmo]

"Painkiller" series finale brought me here. Glen having flashbacks of his life to this song after OD'ing with OxyContin was incredibly poignant and inspired.

[@joaquintamames2040]

To me too. The flashbacks scene is very very beautiful, very poignant

[@mindofastonerreviews406]

My son was born with half a heart this is the only song that brings tears to my eyes. This guy know what human emotions feel like.

[@tommymas1]

🙏🙏🙏🙏💪💪

[@Scare_x_crow]

literally or figuratively?

[@SilentBeaver]

@@Scare_x_crow probably literally

[@theunknowncommenter3444]

Song reminds me of my dad. I miss you so much dad...R.I.P 1951-2018💔

[@peacefullyspeaking]

Wowww.... so sorry about this🥺

[@JBentham1523]

Chuck of course, a long time before Sense8. Chuck and Sarah forever. Viva Buymoria

[@Revansan]

Chuck and Sarah forever!

[@Yomamuh420]

Sense 8 is better Bruv lmao

[@Dj-NaCl_official]

The moment when Shaw comforts Sarah, and the part where Chuck kills Shaw and saves Sarah

[@codypinter4072]

I can't thank sense 8 enough for introducing me to these beautiful, amazing songs.

[@aprilmartinez2173]

Cody Pinter p

[@chrondongo4112]

I met a girl, she told me she had huntintons disease. We werent supposed to fall in love but we did, I wanted to be there for her but when things got bad she just vanished.........she didnt want to put me thru what she was going through. In some ways I see why, but I feel like she left without saying goodbye. She must be long gone from this world now, Ill never know. I just know that the time we spent together was special for both of us, we made the best of things and then when she left Im sure she had her reasons. This song kinda reminds me of her, and how she spared me and left me only with good memories......Bye Christa. :) :(

[@chaimabouaziz5218]

💔

[@seaweedbrain7000]

Heyyy.... I'm not Christa but I did just like she did. I just had to leave to save him from pain and probably meet someone better. I felt like I didn't want to be a burden to him.

[@spiceshewrites]

Most people heard it on Chuck. I'm here because of Fear TWD. 💕🔥

[@artaxAF]

Thank you! I was scrolling the comments trying to remember where I heard this song, and I have no idea who Chuck is, lol. TWD always had great music.

[@mikemckenzie3175]

Such a sad song leading to to maybe the most important scene in the show first and only time chuck ever fires a real gun all to save the most important and best thing that’s ever happened to him

[@oliverday7346]

Heard this song years ago and for the life of me couldn't find it again - didnt know artist or title but for one line - "I suggested a smile - you didn't talk for a while". Thank Christ I found it - amazing lyrics

[@vinceadams662]

Wonderful concept of a cancerous relationship, and the literal impact of the real thing. Masterfully done

[@ham2629]

I'm listening to these in order and I didn't realise that it changed from Prolouge. That transition was awesome.

[@frudi]

The cancer and hospice setting are used as metaphors, not to be taken completely literally. The song, and the entire album, is about being stuck in an abusive relationship with a partner with a mental disorder. I suppose you could view those as sort of a cancer of the mind. And the hospital setting can also be understood as after them attempting suicide, threats or attempts of which are an unfortunately common form of extreme emotional abuse by emotionally unstable abusive partners. Viewing your abuser in that light, as someone otherwise good and worth loving, but whose mind is being corrupted by this horrible mental illness, instead of realising the disorder is an integral part of them that can not be separated from the good parts, is a form of codependency that is often at the core of what keeps people trapped in abusive relationships. No matter how much love or desire to help them you may feel, how much the mere thought of leaving fills you with guilt, you can't love them into getting better if you stay. You will only end up stuck in a completely one-sided relationship, sacrificing more and more of yourself for someone who does not understand or appreciate most of it and will only ever keep demanding more and more of you until there's nothing left of yourself to give. That is the unpayable debt that you owe them that the song speaks of. It's what they 'hire' you for, as a partner (or as a friend, or a family member), to try and fill an emotional void inside them that can never be filled, no matter how much of your love you pour into it. Others, whose view is not distorded by the pink-colored glasses of love, will recognise the red flags and may try warning you, call them a hurricane thunderclap, tell you that there is no saving them; but of course you think you know better and they have no idea what they're talking about. Until, after it is all over and you're picking up the pieces of what's left of your life, you finally realise they were right all along. And then you'll be left asking yourself, what kept me standing by that hospital bed? What made me believe they could ever love me back, when even me trying to support them and make them feel better was met with them freezing, ignoring me, pushing me away and telling me to leave? Why couldn't I quit when I should have, when even they told me to leave?

[@therealx1ras453]

Beautiful explanation. I hadn’t realized that yet.

[@ghiotion]

That easily the best, most concise explanation of this song and the whole album I've ever read. I'm a terrified to think your brilliant insight was hard won. I'm hoping you were able to arrive at that via empathy and a deep well of intuition, instead of experiencing it first hand.

[@josephinehuynh2765]

Thank you for helping me realize that. I’m on my girlfriends account at the moment, and have been listening to this song on repeat for awhile. I suffer from Extreme Bi-polar, and various concoctions of mental issues. This is what I needed to see; so for that I thank you so much.

[@moonsigil]

this. it's so weird to me that there's so many comments here taking the song literally. critical thinking skills and media literacy are increasingly rare in this world. very concerning. like... it's really weird that people in these comments are talking about how this song reminds them of their kind-hearted loved ones who passed away from illness. which is really really sad, but this song is not romantic or loving. it's not flattering at all to the person being sung about. it's very explicitly about how toxic the person is. relating this song to someone you loved is not exactly a very good way to honor them.

[@vkatgol]

Hugs

[@jessieeee]

This song is so beautiful but at the same time so disturbing (and sad, of course)... the line "you'd been abused by the bone that refused you" kills me...

[@honestabe5153]

that's exactly what makes the song so great

[@LuanSalama]

Sim. A verdade é que se eu estiver sozinho em silencio e botar essa musica, eu choro toda vez

[@andrewdentremont8415]

When I hear the line about the morphine alarms out of tune, I hear Alaris tones in my head

[@jessieeee]

I posted this comment 2 years ago... now, my grandma has passed away from Covid-19 three months ago, after struggling a lot in the hospital. The song just got a whole new meaning, I can't stop crying :(

[@karavani]

This has to be one of the most beautiful songs I have ever heard.

[@markhidalgo525]

The lyrics are dark lol

[@karavani]

@@markhidalgo525 hella dark, ik lol

[@lone6383]

My emotionally abusive ex put me through hell, threatening suicide daily and now I listen to this song whenever I think about it. It fucked me up so bad I lost sleep for years... This song eases the pain a bit. Or at least helps me feel it so I don't bottle it all up...

[@juancarloszz536]

FEAR THE WALKING DEAD

[@lizard1533]

This is the type of song to go at the end of a great film!

[@alfredavdiu2622]

it did check Painkiller (2023)

[@asifthevamp]

camp x ray too.

[@likabochorishvili2975]

It's been like 4 years since I haven't listened to this band and god what a mistake. Shouldn't have left this behind. Now that I'm back I went for this album and found some new feelings at the feeling store. Most of the songs in this album hurt so much, but this is some kind of different pain, it gives you a mental breakdown but with a little smile on your face.

[@andrewdentremont8415]

This album got me through some really hellish weeks in medic school. I'd just listen to it on repeat while studying.

[@shannonharvey8300]

What are you in medical school? RN, doctor, what?

[@andrewdentremont8415]

@@shannonharvey8300 medic school, as in paramedic

[@paulking8275]

I was deep in med school. Then suddenly quit because I realized how much I hate people. I can’t save people if I hate them. So now I’m a DEC cop. I get to fuck up people that fuck up animals and nature

[@boneshd_6133]

Fanfic brought me here. I’m glad I did. I’m damn crying. This is hard

[@bertbosman7745]

I had cancer, kettering is everthing i ever wanted to say to precious people in that time, where i didn't had the chance too. I was wrong to them and opposite . The hurt, two ways, is only understood by the ones who where there. There is no I in it. The pain is harder for the leftbehinds.

[@work7844]

This just landed on my shuffle from a BoxSetGo compilation from 2009 (back when blogging was awesome for music). With 35K songs on my MicroSD it isn't often a song makes me stop in my tracks. This song accomplished that. Took me 10 years to hear it but it was right on time.

[@arto995]

Yo, that's where I heard it. I have a few BoxSetGo comps and regret not going download crazy at the time. Music blogging circa 2009 was awesome.

[@deathwitheponine]

That’s amazing. Hope you’re doing okay today.

[@ashleywilliam6327]

This song 😪 my mother was in hospice and my ex made me a mixed CD with this song included. My ex had her battles. I appreciate this moment. I still grieve for my mom. Beautiful music.

[@blankabodog5293]

“I don’t know if Snape’s a good guy. But I know you are...”

[@-alotaibi9243]

Love , Blondie

[@GajendranSudharson]

Chuck brought me here!!!

[@SplaXie]

'It's over Finn.'

[@016-t1v]

That scene was hard to watch, as I know how hard breakups can be, let alone everything that was happening around them at the time.

[@sirky4243]

@@016-t1v Finn? You mean Finn from Adventure Time?

[@victoriayaremchuk7185]

@@sirky4243 no, i guess he meant Finn from " The 100"

[@laura-pw6uh]

don't know why, but whenever jughead is in danger and they're looking for him, great songs are playing

[@erikaobritis8709]

As a nurse who often becomes too close to my patients because I too needed saving in my life from many dark things and I just want to save everyone so this song is very emotional. I have CPTSD from severe child abuse, DV, rape, having to save my mother and sisters by holding a violent man at knife point, the death of my father, my grandparents, jails, Foster Care and much more and I just can't help that my personal life, my emotions, and mostly my love seep into my work 🥺💕

[@shyofthemoon1175]

I'm so sorry you've experienced all of that sister. Life can be so cruel. Your patients are so lucky to have you. My brother is a nurse in the ICU and he said a lot of nurses don't care about the patients and he has to fight for the patients when talking to the doctors sometimes. You are a blessing to those around you and you are loved dearly by Jesus.

[@SometimesWeMustStayInTheShadow]

😢❤❤❤❤

[@oswaldo1ism]

The world doesn't deserve you, but we need you 😿😿😿

[@PolarZeus]

New Amsterdam brought me here! Amazing song

[@dragonmoonchild6851]

ME TOO! NEW AMSTERDAM! THEY HAVE THE BEST SONGS! ONE OF THEIR BEST EPISODES!

[@016-t1v]

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land amongst the stars. ~Les Brown

[@jimmycricket6592]

Heard this song the first time in camp X-ray it's a great song

[@joaquintamames2040]

Beautiful. In remembrance of all who suffer.

[@Litepaw]

This hits me even harder after being abandoned by someone who I thought was really close to me during + after I had blood poisoning and had to have open heart surgery with unknown chances of survival. But i barely survived. I'm 29.

[@abdurahmanmohamed3378]

Stop being a victim

[@Litepaw]

@@abdurahmanmohamed3378 bruh you have no idea who I am or what I do. Grow up kid

[@stygiovictoria]

i cry to this song a lot

[@ianlect00]

Delicious Song !

[@ericpadilla2454]

RIP Liza

[@SoupSpot]

11 years. The first time I cried as a teenager 14yo freshman in highschool, and the last time I cried listening it to now as a 23 year old mother.

[@micahperry3186]

Am I the only one who found this on Fear The Walking Dead. Twas a very powerful season 1 finale.

[@CableMD]

The Mythical Murican agreed

[@jakkitaylor1145]

Got here from watching”the 100”

[@chrisbranscome6113]

I got here from fear of the walking dead, I actually just started the series😂

[@pthespidey5057]

Here from chuck 3x13 ( aired on 2010)

[@gabrielarios9961]

You can also find it in the movie “Camp X Ray” this song made me cry

[@thom13thom]

My impeccable taste in music brought me here... years ago.

[@joshualane1716]

Read as: I liked it before it was cool

[@charadreemurr126]

Same fellow hipster douche.

[@ana_maric]

Yes!

[@dannybondsofficial]

Todd Thomason yess

[@bellumsounds]

Got dat right 💪

[@tc.645]

I remember a long time ago I would hear my sister play this song to sleep to but I could never understand the words until today I looked them up to listen to such a beautiful song

[@Fernando-gs5mc]

really touching!

[@melissapatterson3218]

I never could find a song that described what the entire relationship with my mother was actually like from as far back as I can remember Until I found this one through the algorithm

[@Bitterswheat]

For anyone who loves the theme of this song and enjoys anime or animated movies, "I Want to Eat Your Pancreas" does a beautiful job of expressing the term hurricane thunderclap

[@ekOPeckinpah]

So beautiful music thank!!!

[@lecat146]

Chuck when he saves Sarah from Shaw 🤌🏼👌🏼✊🏼

[@tierszaphipps4809]

This song sounds like lucid dreaming. I don't know how to explain it, it just gives identical feelings and it messes with my head

[@kay9111]

I’ve lost 5 people from the age 4 to the age 15 and they were awful. I miss them everyday, sitting in a hospital for a long time having hope until the reality is set in they aren’t going to be around anymore, then that’s when life gets real, those 5 family members that passed tore a hole in my family, both my parents fighting after my uncle passed away, my friends left me and started bullying me, I had no one, how I’m still living I don’t know but I had to not give up because dear god I wanted to, the worst part is my parents are my grand parents, my dad took drugs and got drunk all the time and abused me, my mom left without a trace.

[@ofranky324]

That is an incredible horrible storry, I'm so sorry for you!! I hope you are okay at the moment?! If you are abused try to get out of there and get some help, talk to someone you can trust, maybe a teacher or the police. But please, please get you some help, you are never alone and you are worth to have a wonderful life!!! You are valued and loved, every time, also if it doesn't feel like that in a moment. I'm sending love to you ♥️♥️♥️

[@TheContemplativeGuy]

Today, 3 years ago I lost my Sister... She was my ally and partner in crime. I miss you Sis

[@redmoor1852]

To Ali, I don't know if Snape is a good guy, but I know you are. *With love, Blondie.*

[@mahaali1588]

and a perfect song to end with

[@loganbraden1866]

The Repeaters. Brought me here.

[@henryrios912]

Damn got me right in the feelz...

[@maharshilst.9794]

1st part makes me sleep n thn 2nd wakes me up

[@alexandermontagnet3361]

Amazing, in a good way. Connections. Thank you for sharing.

[@-..l]

fear the walking dead

[@whispersignal1]

From 2:44 onward, I cannot help but hear Street Spirit (Fade Out) by Radiohead. 🎶Immerse your sooooooul in loooooove!🎶

[@yussefb.2356]

I should have quit, but instead I took care of you.

[@terceirao-pl5sc]

Love loved loved loved.

[@richardgillyon553]

Bought the album when it came out and this wS always the stand out track

[@Revansan]

"No Chuck I can. You can't"

[@emirfikretyavasoglu5643]

Ahw thanks man I'm gonna start 7 times again to chuck

[@Revansan]

@@emirfikretyavasoglu5643 I know i watch it every year

[@amithaldar7453]

Im here from fear the walking dead season 1 episode 6 🖤

[@charliebell5584]

This was one of the most painful songs used in chuck.

[@ΓιώργοςΦούντας-Μουσταφέρης]

New Amsterdam brought here.

[@MarcusZepeda]

Fear The walking Dead, brought me here.

[@thomasdecarlo8543]

The song knows my pain and tells the story of my pain …... biopsies, ports, chemo(s), surgeries, radiation, proton therapy, immunotherapy …

[@wanabevideographer1613]

Heard this from when Octavia and Lincoln separated in the 100

[@jonathancooper4914]

Likewise. What a brilliant scene.

[@clarateixeiramartinho4273]

Chuck forever ❤️

[@AutoHoax]

Not exactly the type of song you hear on the radio, or you sing with the family when driving in the country. For those that know , well, they unfortunately know.... And yet melancholy can be an emotional state that is alien and misunderstood to most.... for those who have been dealt in life, a hand of cards best described as uneventful, or like a novice with a pallet too naive to be able to appreciate a fine cognac, those types that can only experience the harsh burn.... Songs like these are comforting to those who have walked through some shit other fortunately don't get.

[@amiri7392]

I watch 3 shows with this, FTWD, the 100, Sense8

[@MrDestroyedSoulx]

Azenix Me too. I actually watched FTWD, and the 100 in the last few weeks. I started rewatching the 100 2 days ago, I'm already on episode 6 of season 2.

[@nyssaalghul-queen08]

may we meet again

[@bazza259]

broo same

[@jhonnysims2684]

Painkiller s1 ep 8

[@rolandoovelar9059]

El comentario en español que faltaba . Lindo , nostálgico , frio ,lúgubre y triste 😥

[@Alejandro-pm7mm]

Coming from Sense8 ??

[@elisaking3123]

Beautiful music

[@rommiezero]

is there any way to get an instrumental of this!

[@beleavation]

People who like this song are maybe dead, maybe why this isn't so popular.

[@7411CM]

Painkiller brought me here😢

[@adadn568]

I love you....

[@1c3manBG]

"You can't flash. Cant you? Just stay here. I don't want to hurt you. None of this is your fault. I haven't told them your secret. But if you follow me I will kill you." "Sarah...." .... "The drop will dull the pain. You won't feel a thing." "Stop" "I've warned you." "Please. I doesn't have to be like this. This isn't you Shaw. You cant do this." .... "... Happy Birthday!.... I love you!" .... "No Chuck. I can. You can't." BANG BANG BANG BANG.... "Sarah...."

[@muanar]

Just started watching Sense8.

[@Cxadadze15]

I love this

[@hipciatella7670]

me encanto esta canción desde la primera vez que la escuche...

[@bonnie7857]

“how to get away with murder„

[@pthespidey5057]

Chuck 3x13 ( aired sometime in 2009-10) came here from that

[@hipciatella7670]

thanks..

[@conantheseptuagenarian3824]

wow.

[@GeometricShapes]

My great taste in music brought me here a long time ago...

[@pumpkin0147]

Camp X Ray bring me here✊

[@shubhamshingadia1946]

❤️

[@atakta1]

това е толкова красиво карате да почустваш собствената си душа или за някои специален човек за които те грижа

[@Martin-jn1tr]

Fuck off foreigner

[@SairaNohemiAjanel]

Idon't know English very well but listening to this music makes me feel very sad.😢

[@diegososa4498]

Sense8

[@slayer4609]

Ich vermiss dich....2.01.2003.......2006.... Danach weiß ich nicht mehr wer ich bin..... sucht ist daß was ich lange danach liebte um mich weiter zu verlieren..

[@Scare_x_crow]

This will be the song that'll play on my funeral

[@JaneDoe-zc2zn]

Did he kill the woman some of these songs are about? Was he highly abusive towards her, as well?

[@sleepingforest8214]

Offspring 💙💙