The Birds & the Bees…& Cricket | Citizen Khan | BBC Comedy Greats

Mr Khan nervously attempts to teach his daughter the facts of life.
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[@ibzsyed5590]

"the he shows you his bat...." "then next thing you know, your letting him play on your pitch"😂😂😭😭😭😭

[@Surfing566]

Lol 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@gmmrk35]

If someone didn't yet understand what USA is then he is child It's USA the root of terr∅rism and terr∅r funding then blame others and then destr∅y whole country just like Iraq etc USA statement was they did found any of such kinda weapons in Iraq while your USA l∅oted and controlled oil reserves. now they blame imm!grants of the country they drone atta¢k and destroyed. Europe is Secular but we will do !slamophob!a. You got bu®ned your a$$ when we say something about chr!stians in our country But I wonder when will America stop supporting zionists of Palestine Isn't Israel acting as Religious Extremist Nation They claim Palestinian land with the help of America on basis of Religion It's USA the root of terr∅rism and terr∅r funding then blame others and then destr∅y whole country just like Iraq etc

[@Dori1951]

@@gmmrk35, it's two months later, so I hope you are OK now!

[@gmmrk35]

@@Dori1951 drone atta¢ks by America have been stopped yet

[@anatine_banana_69]

@@gmmrk35 dude... You're spamming this everywhere Are you way too free or way too obnoxious? Or both?

[@mxgirl918]

OMG I can never look at cricket the same way again!!!!

[@tahiraparveen5414]

hahaha.. ten ten

[@unholydex563]

mxgirl918 100th like

[@swewunna]

Mr Khan is the only one who made Cricket Sexy.

[@amz_azim]

@@tahiraparveen5414 itz tang tang

[@jonathangonzales1988]

You been bowled

[@seansteel3326]

I feel bad for people who don't understand cricket terminologies. This was too funny :))

[@stevelaughalong1962]

I don't quite understand that

[@harrysmith3041]

I play cricket and understand the terms

[@ThomasTVP]

The mere existence of cricket only provides further proof that all English men are fairies.

[@ThomasTVP]

@@sunitafisher4758 Lots of people in the countries you occupied and squeezed for their natural resources, enslaved their people [down to the smalles kids], raped their women, tortured millions,, do. Something to be very proud of, certainly. But thanks for proving my point, fairy.

[@francaperotti5934]

Cricket is boring and I don't understand it at all

[@wordoflife8158]

Show you his bat... 😂 😂 😂 I lost it

[@spock7945]

and pads and helmet!

[@ntatemohlomi2884]

@Venky Wank stop talking dirty now.

[@gmmrk35]

If someone didn't yet understand what USA is then he is child It's USA the root of terr∅rism and terr∅r funding then blame others and then destr∅y whole country just like Iraq etc USA statement was they did found any of such kinda weapons in Iraq while your USA l∅oted and controlled oil reserves. now they blame imm!grants of the country they drone atta¢k and destroyed. Europe is Secular but we will do !slamophob!a. You got bu®ned your a$$ when we say something about chr!stians in our country But I wonder when will America stop supporting zionists of Palestine Isn't Israel acting as Religious Extremist Nation They claim Palestinian land with the help of America on basis of Religion It's USA the root of terr∅rism and terr∅r funding then blame others and then destr∅y whole country just like Iraq etc......

[@yusufsyed7852]

@@gmmrk35 True, but im confused why is this comment here?

[@kiwi007]

I wonder how many shots that took. How she kept a straight face shows how good an actress she is.

[@hussaifa]

Quite possibly the best scene of the entire show! I think I might just show this to my daughter rather than have to explain 'tan tan'...

[@VoiAhoyTV]

same.

[@sailaab]

and I hope that the kids/ future generations have enough maturity and learnings from their previous generations to be responsible in their conduct.. especially when it comes to taang taang. for now, that is all we can do.. for ethics, morals, sacraments imbibed can sometimes dilute (or wash away) over time

[@robinafarooq8725]

Your so dam crazy 🤘🏻🤣😭🤣😂😜🤪

[@qaalidhaji6288]

Ahhhhhhhh

[@gmmrk35]

If someone didn't yet understand what USA is then he is child It's USA the root of terr∅rism and terr∅r funding then blame others and then destr∅y whole country just like Iraq etc USA statement was they did found any of such kinda weapons in Iraq while your USA l∅oted and controlled oil reserves. now they blame imm!grants of the country they drone atta¢k and destroyed. Europe is Secular but we will do !slamophob!a. You got bu®ned your a$$ when we say something about chr!stians in our country But I wonder when will America stop supporting zionists of Palestine Isn't Israel acting as Religious Extremist Nation They claim Palestinian land with the help of America on basis of Religion It's USA the root of terr∅rism and terr∅r funding then blame others and then destr∅y whole country just like Iraq etc....

[@maelughran6981]

"Don't tell me how it ends, eh?".... "Boys...only have one thing on their mind...cricket!"...." And the next thing you know, the covers are off..." Brilliant script-writing, and acting to match. Love it.

[@friendsoftheamazonjungle]

As an American who has spent a decade of his life in England and many times played Cricket, I approve of this B&B speech😂,and will try on my daughter one day- using baseball references of course 😂😂😂

[@sailaab]

or just get her to understand cricket more.. as she is growing up... and.. .... some day.. just let her be watching this clip

[@susanphillips2290]

I don't know HOW the actress who plays his daughter, can keep such a straight face....I was laughing so much.

[@Alendi11]

caught out by his googly lmao

[@jabbarkhalid3492]

Alhamdulillah

[@gmmrk35]

If someone didn't yet understand what USA is then he is child It's USA the root of terr∅rism and terr∅r funding then blame others and then destr∅y whole country just like Iraq etc USA statement was they did found any of such kinda weapons in Iraq while your USA l∅oted and controlled oil reserves. now they blame imm!grants of the country they drone atta¢k and destroyed. Europe is Secular but we will do !slamophob!a. You got bu®ned your a$$ when we say something about chr!stians in our country But I wonder when will America stop supporting zionists of Palestine Isn't Israel acting as Religious Extremist Nation They claim Palestinian land with the help of America on basis of Religion It's USA the root of terr∅rism and terr∅r funding then blame others and then destr∅y whole country just like Iraq etc......

[@b.benjamineriksson6030]

My mother tried to "give me the talk" when I was 16. I laughed and told her I wasn't a virgin. My father laughed so hard he could barely stand.

[@Nyk908]

@@gmmrk35 wooooww that escalated quickly. 😂

[@jakubpociecha8819]

@@Nyk908 The dude is literally in every single Citizen Khan-related video XD

[@SaddamHussain-we9ec]

@@jakubpociecha8819 that's nice na.

[@jakubpociecha8819]

@@SaddamHussain-we9ec Yeah,I checked his channel and it turns out he's a gamer

[@SaddamHussain-we9ec]

@@jakubpociecha8819 okay, I dislike two types of KZbinrs first gamers n second those who makes so called reaction videos.

[@bbcdoosra.4134]

That little pause with a outburst of Cricket was sooo funny 😂😂😂😂

[@kruzerblade4740]

2:10 never realised he low-key threw shade at his wife when he said ‘cricket is boring’

[@Biggyable]

Mr khan is hilarious 😂

[@mranonymous1547]

Boys only think about cricket 😂😂

[@bovinepereira4207]

Can you explain?

[@braveheart816]

@@bovinepereira4207 .. lol .. Cricket is just a code word here being used to convey a different message. Actually, the father is trying to warn his girl to stay away from boys as boys have sex and girls on their mind all the time :D. The terms bat, covers, pitch etc. you will only understand if you are familiar with the game.... that was tooo funny :D

[@austinscott813]

@@bovinepereira4207 Are you 8 years old?

[@syedferoz2188]

thoko

[@takingabreak2636]

@@braveheart816 nooooo dont poloute that kids mind with that stuff now it's going to be dirty minded this is how innocent flowers turn into absolute rubbish ;-;

[@mrsTraveller64]

And all I could think of was how I love those oldfashioned homes with separate rooms😊 I hate open kitchens and open livingrooms,no walls, only one big area,this home looks so cozy,like my home😍

[@onehitman3860]

One day if I have a daughter I am going to use this to explain "boys"🤣😂

[@thornbird6768]

Comedy gold , Community leader Mr Khan is hilarious he’s put Sparkhill back on the map and in a good way 😆

[@jaykahar1596]

Lol this guy is taking over Mr bean.

[@doublepump1615]

Jay Kahar 159 he already has

[@ShirinMaryam]

XpertGamer 789 hes not

[@dakshinpradeep7711]

In your dreams

[@asef698]

Mr bean is king

[@owenmellor5394]

Jay Kahar 159 XX.dldls

[@hannabard5455]

"Sort of..." Hahaha

[@top-man-one]

😁

[@sailaab]

P McKenna you are pervert

[@laileynawabi7618]

Dave: Asslamu Alikum , Mr Khan Mr Khan: Hello , Dave

[@ChindiChitranna]

you just have to score a cover drive, he means :)

[@gmmrk35]

If someone didn't yet understand what USA is then he is child It's USA the root of terr∅rism and terr∅r funding then blame others and then destr∅y whole country just like Iraq etc USA statement was they did found any of such kinda weapons in Iraq while your USA l∅oted and controlled oil reserves. now they blame imm!grants of the country they drone atta¢k and destroyed. Europe is Secular but we will do !slamophob!a. You got bu®ned your a$$ when we say something about chr!stians in our country But I wonder when will America stop supporting zionists of Palestine Isn't Israel acting as Religious Extremist Nation They claim Palestinian land with the help of America on basis of Religion It's USA the root of terr∅rism and terr∅r funding then blame others and then destr∅y whole country just like Iraq etc

[@marylynch951]

So funny The Dad try to tell the daughter what boys really want Absolutely brilliant

[@hanzi8297]

shush

[@nitishbansal6878]

This writing is brilliant, how he used cricket terminology as euphemisms!!

[@akashpandey5260]

best show ever (one of them :p )....love this show

[@maheshkarthick8447]

I think gals prefer Test Match rather than T20! 🔥 😜😜😂

[@anatine_banana_69]

No, no... Test match is 5 days Women won't like a match for 5 particular days, periodic

[@innerlight4601]

Second best comedy show after Mind your language ♥

[@mohsinhuss6357]

Check fawlty towers

[@noahhughes2501]

@Sal m I doubt there can even be a best, just a top tier. So many great shows!

[@shivangimodirak8125]

i was waiting for somebody to mention this. your comment just made my day

[@lovelylife979]

Yes man .. I will get married with girl who likes mind ur langauge.. 😊😊😊😊

[@aneesaa00]

Me being 12 year old kid I usually watch these and wonder how old the other viewers are compared to me. I’ve never seen a kid who watches Citizen Khan and Mind Your Language

[@kimzoey9816]

taeng taeng 😂😂 I love this show lol

[@francmittelo6731]

The word "googly" reminds me of that South African spinner who had a unique bowling technique.

[@stephjayne7382]

Ya know tang tang . Hahahha

[@bulkychalky9697]

Venky Wank do you stalk him?

[@loudandclear6588]

What’s going on here?

[@gmmrk35]

If someone didn't yet understand what USA is then he is child It's USA the root of terr∅rism and terr∅r funding then blame others and then destr∅y whole country just like Iraq etc USA statement was they did found any of such kinda weapons in Iraq while your USA l∅oted and controlled oil reserves. now they blame imm!grants of the country they drone atta¢k and destroyed. Europe is Secular but we will do !slamophob!a. You got bu®ned your a$$ when we say something about chr!stians in our country But I wonder when will America stop supporting zionists of Palestine Isn't Israel acting as Religious Extremist Nation They claim Palestinian land with the help of America on basis of Religion It's USA the root of terr∅rism and terr∅r funding then blame others and then destr∅y whole country just like Iraq etc......

[@cameragg9752]

🤣🤣🤣🤣OMG this is freaking hilarious.. His bat! 🤣🤣Bowled out by his googly roflmao Il never think of cricket normally now

[@malunaalam1225]

The way hes going with this......🙌🙌🙌🙌😂😂

[@himaldew]

Best comedy serial i have ever seen... Hahah.. we do tang tang off or on field

[@ab-world502]

F* Hilarious......Can not stop laughing when I am walking in the streets and think about this particular scene.

[@hip2thabone_da_sticky1]

Khan: "You let him play on your pitch!"😀😁

[@joelene2000]

He really explains it well🤣

[@jelenav3336]

Omg honestly his way of explaining it!

[@rushiljohar4206]

He shows you his BAT!!!!?? HAHAHAAHAHHAHA 😂

[@laurenceellis6256]

Does the comedian who portrays Mr Khan write the script or does someone else tell him what to say?

[@NinjaNip]

idk

[@snsindigo2747]

He's a member of the production team so he takes part in writing it alongside the shows writers.

[@user-hl4yk7sz6o]

Laurence Ellis sßs

[@DiabolicalPaperClip]

He writes it! Adil Ray, great comedian.

[@zaidali7299]

Hi Laurence Ellis its Mr adil ray who write this nice comedy script, Thanks

[@adharshmanikoth3381]

Daughter :Reading history of islam khan: Don't tell me how it ends ... quote of the century

[@randomrahul5221]

What a nice way of teaching the Bird and bees topic..😝

[@hselctrical]

Teaching a obvious slapper about birds and the bees 😂

[@madlad9726]

it's very cute when she says papaji

[@dhruvtrivedi7689]

The best scene in entire citizen Khan series

[@brittneyhall5962]

How do meet you after work together on your new show keep Rick and god bless make me smile 😊🇻🇨

[@SuperDannyb1975]

Good scene :-) VERY pleased to see that people (including some Asian people) can see this for the good laugh that it is. I looked this up after receiving a group email from an old work mate, just out of curiosity to see the comments. Without wanting to be provocative in any way at all, I was expecting a shed full of childish PC troublemakers to say it's racist and stereotypical (never mind the fact that it's 100% accurate and acted by Asian people anyway) I remember being in hospital once and a doctor asked me what I was into. I said I was a cyclist and competed in races etcetc................... FIRST thing out of his mouth was "YOU SHOULD PLAY CRICKET!! GENTLEMAN'S GAME !!! it sounded like an order not a suggestion the way he said it :-)

[@spock7945]

your doc mustav been a brown South Asian, a _desi_ proud of his heritage. don't worry, i'm brown (Indian) and proud of being a desi. the show abd Adil initially got a lot of flak from so called Pakistanis or Muslims who can't differentiate between blasphemous insults and clean fun caricatures which might be sometimes over the top. though this show is spot on in it's depiction of the first generation earlier migrant population and the way they (tried to) fit in while the umbilical cord to India Pakistan (our heritage) was still connected!

[@SuperDannyb1975]

Hi there Spock I didn't actually realise you'd replied to my comment. Just seen it going through emails must have missed the alert. Thanks for the reply. Your comment sounds spot on and well balanced. To be honest I'm not actually sure if he was Indian or Pakistani it just made me smile at the time, but not in a racist stereotype way. I have always found Indian people especially friendly but admit freely that I do find Muslims generally harder to relate to. I used to use an Indian takeaway here in the North West of England that was on a row of terraced houses and remember hating the way the white kids were massively disrespectful to the owners who were very nice people. Best wishes to you Cheers

[@spock7945]

pardon my bout of verbal diarrhoea there. i ranted and ranted incoherently! i wonder though, what might you/ your folks have savoured from the desi food joint [aap mujh se badey hein, shayad. thou art elder to me, probably] inmy family and myself in particular, we don't really like spicy or hot (chilli) food and thus do not at all confirm to the stereotypical (curry eating) image. for me, the only exception is the Bhujia... that too of Haldiram brand amazon.co.uk/dp/B00LHXUM8E kzbin.info?search_query=bhujia+ingredients it is basically chickpea flour or Bengal gram flour with the usual turmeric etcetera and i think en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ajwain 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗮𝗱𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘁𝗶𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗿𝗮𝗻𝗱, 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗱𝘂𝗰𝘁 𝗼𝗿 𝗔𝗺𝗮𝘇𝗼𝗻, it's just that since childhood i'd raid the fridge for (home made) curd and the snacks cabinet for bhujia and mix these two. be it day or past midnight! :P thehindu.com/features/metroplus/Food/in-search-of-bikaneri-bhujia/article3945487.ece although as a vegetarian that doesn't count much. i have OCD of sorts and hygiene phobia so i anyway don't eat out unless in a social trap. then too: avoid oily and fried stuff. the South Asian cuisine is a goldmine for lovers of meaty fare though :) [man.. i've been with friends and even relatives .. back in India.. in Kerala.. they eat ANYthing.. literally anything] by the way; not all Hindus are fanatical a-holes about cows. heck we were top consumers of bovine gelatin, hide/leather, meat and top exporters for donkey years. ᵗᶦˡˡ ᵗʰᵉˢᵉ ʳᵃˢᶜᵃˡˢ ᶜᵃᵐᵉ ᶦⁿᵗᵒ ᵖᵒʷᵉʳ. ʷᵉ ʰᵃᵛᵉ ᵃ ᵀʳᵘᵐᵖ ᵃᵈᵐᶦⁿᶦˢᵗʳᵃᵗᶦᵒⁿ ᵒᶠ ᵒᵘʳ ᵒʷⁿ. ᵒᵛᵉʳ ᵃᵐᵇᶦᵗᶦᵒᵘˢ, ⁿᵃʳᶜᶦˢˢᶦˢᵗᶦᶜ ᵗʳᶦᵘᵐᵛᶦʳᵃᵗᵉ :⁽

[@SuperDannyb1975]

:-) very Informative my friend thank you- myself mainly Chicken Dopiaza nothing too crazy with all the red hot spice. As you say it's generally a Brittsh distortion and stereotype that all of the Hindu/Islamic nations eat red hot curry all the time.

[@arunseigell7361]

When BBC almost caved to stop the series the outcry from asians forced them to continue with it.

[@星空-i1k]

I can't understand anything he says after "and the next thing you know.... ". Please help.

[@shakibhossain4023]

First of all you have to know what is Cricket, then u could understands the meaning of the conversation 🤪

[@onlyhousestarklivesmatter]

Essentially... He's saying that boys only have -sex- "cricket" in mind. And if she decides to 'watch' (get naked with him) the guy will show his -penis- "bat".... The next thing you know she'll be letting him play on her pitch which means one thing will lead to another and they'll be doing the dirty deed 😂😂😂 "caught out by his googly"... Now googly is a very difficult ball to play so I am assuming he's trying to say that she will end up pregnant... But yeah it's extremely funny if you know cricket terminology 😭😭😂😂

[@mdmohsin2618]

You might meet someone, let’s say a boy 🤣🤣

[@abbasabdullahi468]

HE SHOWS YOU HIS BAT HAHAHAHAHA

[@esmaelosman6172]

I just found out how dirty minded I am because I understood the cricket Terminology and I have never even watched cricket game let alone playing😂

[@restinson2651]

Yup

[@deji2391]

When my dad gets the cricket bat he hits 6s on my head

[@peaceful9007]

Bring comedy like this back

[@codyslater7006]

bring back this show!!

[@majid1271]

Yes he writes the Script him self

[@spock7945]

may be some of them!! that was brutal af 😝 #when #you #get #it #once #a #year #ONLY #a #birthday i wonder if Mrs. Khan and Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler would've empathised with each other. [both Sheldon and Mr. Community Leader are unique in a special way!]

[@jacquelinemoore9677]

Love this show.

[@bobasnee7755]

Boys have one thing on their mind.... cricket 😂😂😂

[@vareeshakhan2434]

man looks like hes gonna have a stroke LMAOOOOO

[@rushiljohar4206]

He's a brilliant actor

[@12debaduttadas23]

Being an Indian I agree 100 percent that's how my father explained me about it , untill I told him baba I know😂

[@darkknight17]

Wow she's lit😍🔥

[@robinafarooq8725]

I just can't stop looking at your videos 😂#so funny

[@HibahEditzz2012]

I love how he says Muslim do tang tang left righ and centre Lao

[@divasalewskivevo9286]

I love him😂😂😂

[@richardmann3396]

Not one bird nor one bee was harmed nor even mentioned during this discussion about the birds and the bees. 🐦 🐝

[@naved.a]

Hahaha one of the best comedy series

[@vyomveerudh2787]

Sanjeev bhaskar and you need to join forces Mr. Citizen khan. That be as good as cricket like in a show you two are neighbours that should be theme.

[@aurazoscript4646]

I am a professional cricketer. Man, this is hilarious 😂

[@marylynch951]

Absolutely brilliant

[@thewhisperer3234]

Don't tell me how it end😂😂😂

[@Superbonk777]

What does he mean by that?

[@xn85d2]

@@Superbonk777 It's the normal thing to say about a story in a book to not want the ending spoiled. But here it doesn't make sense because it's a history book and the ending would be the situation in the present day.

[@TheHazza118]

😂😂😂😂 very funny

[@ammaarghani8716]

My man says tang tang

[@117giraffe-doc]

I love this show🤣🤣

[@bunkerbros9993]

Add full episodes

[@umairahmad3668]

Well in Pakistan Boys Literally Think about Cricket 🏏 all the Time 😂 The Actual Sports 😬

[@rushiljohar4206]

CRICKET?!!???!!!!! JAJAJAAJAHHJJAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

[@brightpakistan4829]

Asalama alikum I hope you will be fine . i like this episode too much . I need complete seasons of this .

[@iiparachuteregiment8800]

Lol... do they have the full comedy... a dude in my unit his uncle has same hat and similar suite. I need to show him this clip

[@marylynch951]

I used to love watching this programme so funny This programme just like the Irish version of Mrs Brown's Boy's

[@nightmarereactsgames4062]

This is Muslim U racist

[@marylynch951]

@@nightmarereactsgames4062 Omg Racist Let me explain to you What I meant by the TV programme Mrs. Brown's boys ( a comedy) She is an Irish Mother and that's how she talks to her Adult Children Just like Mr Khan

[@marylynch951]

@Felipe M. I find them very funny Both of these programs This is exactly how these families Would have behaved going back in time Seventies and eighties Roman catholic faith is very similar to the Muslim faith

[@staurtsharman2299]

But this was far funnier by a million miles than Mrs Brown's Boys, bar none! 😂😂😂

[@amjadmalik7093]

Very nice ten ten

[@saanzacs]

"She probably be fine!!"

[@fionathomson4436]

Citizen Khan was hilarious 😂

[@ajrwilde14]

all brilliant actors

[@princessrabbitslash4477]

Mr Khan I like the video when you didn’t let Shazia go to somewhere

[@notimetodie4971]

Covers are off then you will let him play on your and he will keep hitting six six six 😂😂😂

[@rubabsikandar4552]

The picture of children reading Quran is so nice

[@sanjidasinthia8176]

Hahaha i cant stop laughing...!!!!

[@moulanasama6443]

Normal Pakistani Innocent words to say to your dad "OK Papa g"

[@teamorbz4463]

Blue bird no pakistani

[@simplyzulu1426]

Pakistani say G abu...

[@shekharjat5972]

Simply Zulu ji. is hindi word...

[@nit23sharma]

@Nervous Norvus .....both are shafting you

[@subashgrg4666]

Urdu came from Hindi.

[@Ericbryanmr]

1:17 in a ball of fire during the last battle of mankind,

[@bermudarailway]

Pure genius

[@razakshaikh5194]

U know tank tank 😂😂

[@mindtrapped9934]

I miss this program

[@DeuceBiggerHo]

Omg she is so beautiful!😍

[@Guddupahadi1980]

hahahaha how simply she got it lol cricket

[@midnightstar1996]

Probably the most funniest scene between Mr Khan and Alia.

[@noordeol5206]

Who’s watching in December 2019?

[@TheHDReleaser]

I like how well dressed he is :D

[@hinarashid5723]

I still can’t believe this guy reads the news.

[@ayejabar7905]

nice show love it

[@zaraimaan1642]

aye jabar

[@zaraimaan1642]

aye jabar ☺☺☺

[@trevor1347]

Which episode is this?