The Church Police

They're the silent guardians... the unsung heroes... the holy watchmen keeping your church safe from sin. They're... the church police!
Pastors, feeling the weight of burnout? Recharge with @TheFocusedPastor eNewsletter, your source of practical guidance, inspiring stories, and valuable FREE resources for navigating the challenges of ministry. Subscribe today: church.focusonthefamily.com/s...
#comedy #church #christian #babylonbee #humor

[@FriendlyEvangelist]

We need the Church Police on our southern border!

[@GilbertdeClare0704]

We need CHUrch POLIIIIICE in DC !

[@survivingbehindliberallines]

Here in Commiefornia also, especially in Sacrapmento.

[@RachDarastric2]

@@GilbertdeClare0704 .... Church police in a crackhouse????????!!!

[@GilbertdeClare0704]

@@RachDarastric2 we here in England DESPERATELY need them FOR REAL ! ! Our police are now ARRESTING people for SILENTLY "praying IN THEIR HEADS", and Christian street preachers are being "moved on" for HATE CRIMES ! PLEASE Church POLIIIICE, come to England and SAVE us ? !

[@RachDarastric2]

@@GilbertdeClare0704 I love Patriotic Englishmen. Shame you are an endangered species. By chance, have your people invented guns yet, or do you still use 2 cricket bats glued together with shards of glass sandwiched between?

[@talljohn66]

I’m a member of our church security and I don’t know whether to laugh or be offended or both.

[@diedfrombored5295]

That's what i'm thinking I can't tell if they're making fun of having security or making up ridiculous scenarios that never happen in order to mock people that bring up absurd scenarios regarding having security/police at the church.

[@jjdogg0]

If you're security at a church and don't know...that's literally part of the problem 🤷🏼

[@scillyautomatic]

I think the answer is "Yes".

[@jjdogg0]

Thanks for your service..allowing us to worship 🙏🏼...you're a goddamn saint

[@BargerClan]

Basically a mega Church, these kind of shenanigans goes on there

[@scillyautomatic]

"He Brews" LOL I almost spit my coffee out when I heard that one!

[@scillyautomatic]

Give a bonus to the team member that came up with that one.

[@davidgill7412]

That actually is the name of our church's coffee shop. Surprised to see it here. I swear the Babylon Bee is prophetic.

[@kimgilson7903]

There is an actual coffee shop named Hebrews in our area. There is another one that is named Holy Grounds near here as well😅.And no, they are not church coffee shops!

[@TheSwiftCreek2]

"Holy grounds" was a great guess.

[@l337pwnage]

A couple decades ago I mighta chuckled, but I've heard enough cringtian humor that I wasn't surprised.

[@marcoquiroz3558]

"Holy Grounds!" "He Brews!" 😂 I died, then resurrected

[@paulis7319]

You're supposed to wait three days!

[@RUHDD4HVN]

Don't forget Holy Roast.....

[@thebenforever]

She gets points for divine inspiration on the improvised title. Lol

[@blshouse]

These are really used for in-church coffee shops. We've several in the area here.

[@shakes268]

Sacred Grounds is a real coffee shop in a Christian hospital in Nashville.

[@june-gl4ln]

Hilarious 😂 “Thou shalt not forsake Chick-fil-A!!” 😅

[@betsybarnicle8016]

I boycot Chick-Fil-A ever since their CEO polished the boots of the BLM leader.

[@stvargas69]

She had a slick get away

[@eddyflo2978]

F**** Chick-fil-A, that bland tiny sorry excuse of a chicken is not even close to a Popeyes chicken sandwich

[@VickiSmith-eg9oo]

They hired a dei.

[@RCAvhstape]

​@@betsybarnicle8016I eat where I please and ignore chicken sandwich politics.

[@StarrySeafarer]

The fact that the officers names are James and John is the perfect finishing touch for this.

[@robertmorrison459]

The sons of Thunder! Loool

[@kj7792]

My nephews are named that too🙏

[@richardmahn7589]

@@kj7792 No place for them at the right side! TOUGH!

[@kj7792]

@@richardmahn7589 ?🤔

[@gabrialgreen659]

Considering their behavior they really only need one police officer named Peter considering how impulsive and stupid they are.

[@goldilocks913]

Won’t lie, I’m going to find it really hard not to shout ‘ CHURCH POLICE!!!’ every time I go past a church now

[@FriendlyEvangelist]

Hahahaha amen!! 😂

[@FriendlyEvangelist]

"LIFT YOUR HANDS UP, SINNERS!"

[@GilbertdeClare0704]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@transparentglazier]

Or "Watch out for the lions!"

[@nb4749]

Don't you mean whenever you walk INTO a Church? "Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching." Hebrews 10:25 CHURCH POLICE!

[@LightningFlower5]

Him throwing the offering plate caught me off guard! 😂

[@transparentglazier]

The dude just wanted change for a dollar

[@kevinsullivan3448]

"I tithe on line! I TITHE ONLINE!" I do tithe online. As the clerk who does the finances I don't want to be part of the cash and check money changers in the temple...

[@samuraijedi1669]

The officer threw the offering plate like he was Captain America Avenger for the LORD!!! 😭🤣☠️

[@samantharocker9694]

"Potential heathen visitors" 😂

[@trappedcat3615]

"Freeze! Put your hands in the air!" "...and sing praises."

[@Jaegan06]

This needs to be a repeat series, it's gold. Just imagine the possibilities you could arrest: guy falling asleep during sermon, old lady with the crinkly wrapper, wrong t shirt worn to church. Please make more!

[@archangelshiro]

Holy cow PLEASE, this^. More ideas: indifferent mothers letting their toddlers roam through the isles instead of using childcare services, people talking annoyingly during sermon, that one person who shouts “AMEN” or “PRAISE” or other random things from *literally every sentence* the pastor finishes speaking, etc… 😂

[@worthfightingfor2299]

LITERALLY! YES!

[@corpnupe85]

Yes! People gossiping during the Service. People going to bathroom while the Pastor is preaching. Etc.

[@scorpio6587]

Cell phone going off!

[@ricksonora6656]

People sitting on the aisle blocking access to center seats. Browsers loudly unwrapping hard candy wrapped in crinkling plastic. Tall people wearing hats sitting in front. Healthy female members repeatedly wearing shorts or low-cut blouses.

[@robertjensen1438]

Old man goes to church One Sunday morning an old cowboy entered a church just before services were to begin. Although the old man and his clothes were spotlessly clean, he wore jeans, a denim shirt and boots that were very worn and ragged. In his hand he carried a worn out old hat and an equally worn out Bible.r> The church he entered was in a very upscale and exclusive part of the city. It was the largest and most beautiful church the old cowboy had ever seen. The people of the congregation were all dressed with expensive clothes and accessories. As the cowboy took a seat, the others moved away from him. No one greeted, spoke to, or welcomed him. They were all appalled at his appearance and did not attempt to hide it. As the old cowboy was leaving the church, the preacher approached him and asked the cowboy to do him a favor. "Before you come back in here again, have a talk with God and ask him what he thinks would be appropriate attire for worship." The old cowboy assured the preacher he would. The next Sunday, he showed back up for the services wearing the same ragged jeans, shirt, boots, and hat. Once again he was completely shunned and ignored. The preacher approached the man and said, "I thought I asked you to speak to God before you came back to our church." "I did," replied the old cowboy. "If you spoke to God, what did he tell you the proper attire should be for worshiping in here?" asked the preacher. "Well, sir, God told me that He didn't have a clue what I should wear. He said He'd never been in this church "

[@susanhicks4149]

Well said !

[@loyevangelists]

Got 'em!

[@PeggyS-xm5xn]

Yup ❤

[@slewis9178]

Bravo

[@blshouse]

It's an older story, told in a million local newspaper columns; but it checks out.

[@Laughy-Flaaffy]

When they mentioned the church cafe, I said out loud _”Bet they’re gonna call it ‘Hebrew’s’”_ and BAM they said it immediately afterwards 🤣🤣🤣

[@stvargas69]

Gotta admit Holy Grounds is a good name

[@AlexanderTheEvenGreater]

The Holy Roast. ;-P

[@pammentzer3584]

As a member of my church safety team, I approve this message. Hold The Line!!!😂

[@davidcurtis5398]

Church safety team, what a laugh.....

[@peaceandjoy2568]

I'm Catholic but I love the authentic Faith in Jesus that our Babylon Bee brethren have. We love you, guys.

[@RUHDD4HVN]

We love you. There's only one mediator between God and man. The man Christ Jesus alone. No other persons need be included including the pope, mother Mary, earthly/heavenly saint, and all. Stay loved, you are.

[@krdiaz8026]

I would like to see a Catholic church police. "Sir, did you put the Eucharist in your pocket?" "No, it was a ... piece of tissue." Draws gun. "Hands in the air! I request back-up. Our Lord's been kidnapped."

[@gch8810]

@@RUHDD4HVNYou clearly don’t understand Catholic theology.

[@Korporaal1]

@@RUHDD4HVN Well it's a good thing that you agree with Catholic theology, then! Join the Holy mother church and live the rich Catholic life. Just mind where you park...

[@RUHDD4HVN]

@@gch8810 It's not that I don't understand catholic theology, but it's that I do understand the bibles very clear teaching and words. Look it up and read it for yourself. I didn't write the words of the truth it contains..... God did. And clearly you don't understand what I already know. It is written: There is only one mediator between God and man, the man Christ Jesus. Simple. Amen *1 Timothy 2:5 Context* A Call to Prayer …4who wants everyone to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth. *5For there is one God, and there is one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus,* 6who gave Himself as a ransom for all-the testimony that was given at just the right time.… Berean Standard Bible

[@jefferydebbink282]

😂 my church has a coffee house, and its name is Holy Grounds!😆

[@speppers69]

I've never seen a church that allowed food and/or drink in it. But then again...I was raised catholic and they don't practice what they preach anyways...

[@diedfrombored5295]

@@speppers69 Every modern church i've been to has donuts and coffee at their services

[@scillyautomatic]

Aren't they all, though?

[@scillyautomatic]

@@speppers69 "I could mess the donuts cooking in the middle of Mass." ~Ricki Lee Jones

[@Azurethewolf168]

@@speppers69most modern churches don’t either, it’s not just Catholics. The whole system has become so corrupt and far off from the original message of Jesus, most people who go just do it simply for cultural reasons.

[@ReasonablySkeptic]

"THEY come here for forgiveness. WE came here..*Pulls glasses off*...FOR JUSTICE!" "The Lord is my shepherd and we're..*Pulls glasses off*...THE DOGS...SHEEP DOGS!"

[@hollienelson6738]

Your people should be expecting a call from their people at any moment! Seriously 🤣😂🤣

[@GC09Summer]

😂

[@hereticsaint100]

The AWANA HangGlider wings badge is what really gives authority.

[@jamezz3100]

Thanks for identifying the wings. As an old guy, I knew it had to be significant, but I was stumped.

[@allenbingham4344]

YOUTH ON THE MARCH!!!!!

[@kj7792]

😊 I was in the Awanas ❤

[@paulis7319]

I was expecting them to arrest the preacher for "drowning" (baptizing) someone. 🤣

[@boxelder9167]

My baptism didn’t take the first few times but after a good waterboarding session I was finally able to rejoin the congregation.

[@amandalynnlucarini9517]

That’s in the Church Police - Presbyterian Division episode.

[@justforever96]

I don't think that really fits the theme. They are busting people for minor "offenses" that are silly but are actual offenses of a sort. Busting the clergyman for performing part of the service would just be out of place. They are the Church Police, they bust you for texting on your phone during the daily prayer, not for performing a normal part of the service. That's like Leslie Nielsen in Naked Gun humor.

[@jengaatc]

James and John, the sons of thunder. 😂 Love that hidden gem.

[@kj7792]

Micheal is the Chief 😂

[@drshoe8744]

"We Got A Runner!" *Church Cops 👮‍♂️

[@indigobunting5041]

Most likely the 3 year old escaping the preschool class.

[@skyttyl]

The Cafe is called "He brews." I lost it. Lol

[@RedpillRecycler]

Greatness! I just shared with my safety team. I will definitely incorporate these tactics into the next team training. 😂

[@davidcurtis5398]

Again, a safety team - what a joke...

[@Joshexel]

The awana sparky patch goes hard

[@barbaraedmonds8381]

Every church needs the offering police. Those building projects don't fund themselves.

[@diedfrombored5295]

Did you see Creflo Dollar's speech on tithe?

[@keepingthefaith9041]

absolutely..😅😂😊

[@barbaraedmonds8381]

​@@diedfrombored5295Brother Dollar needed a new plane. C'mon, man.😂

[@goatsandroses4258]

I know someone who's a non-profit account. Just ask them about those mega-building projects, especially the ones that are used only once a week. That money could be used for a LOT of other things.

[@TheRealMonnie]

I think those building projects would cost much less (zero) if we met in each other's homes instead 😊

[@esteva03]

"He-brews" made me spit half a lung!!! 🤣🤣🤣 I NEED THAT COFEE NOW!!!

[@clw22580]

Better ask first if it’s She-brews it’s 2024 bigot

[@BobcatWolfenstein]

Joel Osteen is questioning the timing on this one

[@pinkiesue849]

He smiles his way thru hell and high water

[@marlan5470]

@@pinkiesue849 He surely smiled as his church kept the doors locked during a certain flood...

[@pinkiesue849]

@@marlan5470 no argument there

[@Rosie_C]

The serious voice, “Have you read Malachi 3:8?” Gave me a good laugh.

[@thejarretlemaster]

church poliiiiice!

[@davidcurtis5398]

Church idiots...

[@bighamspamjr]

Hebrews I'd go there

[@MrVvulf]

Try the kosher cocoa, it will lift your spirit.

[@mustangracer5124]

It's HE- brews.. get it?

[@BasementBerean]

Oh it gets way worse than that. I once tried to organize a prayer meeting among men I knew at church, and I got a call from one of my peers warning me not to usurp the authority of the elders.

[@real_azul_luza]

CHURCH POLICE!

[@andrewfeurtado8698]

My Catholic mens group went rogue and met on a snowday 🤫

[@TheSwiftCreek2]

I.E. we have a pecking order and want you to know you're not at the top of our list.

[@BasementBerean]

@@fibonacho Regular.

[@sjp35productions6]

I’ve seen some pastors who believe it’s their job to control every aspect of the lives of the congregation. I’ve also seen other congregations where this is encouraged. I prefer the latter.

[@becklyn3]

Oh my goodness....an awana badge? You guys are killing me over here! 😂

[@cthurbz5146]

I laughed so hard at this one- and when that lady jumped the car? About died 😂

[@dennisanderson3895]

I recalled a Monty Python skit wherein a cat died and family members were, "Call the church," "Call the police," Call the church police." Calling in unison for "The church police! The church police!," the ecclesiastical officers arrive to investigate. (HaHa) Very good vid here. These people have clearly seen many LE body cam vids as I have. 👍

[@wlinden]

And “We will conclude this arrest with Hymn number….” All things bright and beautiful, all creatures great and small, All things wise and wonderful, The church fuzz nicked them all.

[@justforever96]

This is not body cam stuff, this is clearly taken straight from one of the scripted police dramas on TV, with a few elements reminiscent of live police shows like Cops, like the intro bit and theme/logo. I watch hundreds of actual body cam videos and I have never seen officers or suspects act anything like this at any time. When was the last time you saw an actual body cam showing slow motion dramatic action shots of the two main characters with drawn weapons, or heard them using over dramatic interrogations with sudden "gotcha" moments, or seen an officer take down a fleeing suspect by throwing an object at him to knock him down? That's all pure Hollywood.

[@jeremysack5939]

The lady coming up with the name "Holy Grounds" on the spot for a Coffee Place is Genius. There HAS to be a coffe house with that name!

[@Mark_Henry]

I was an "usher" during a semester of Bible college... I felt like we were the church police. I remember this one guy's entire personality changed when he became an usher lol. He was busting students left and right for any infringement... no matter how small. I remember the head usher had one of those perfect church names. His last name was literally Pentecost lol and he took himself way too serious. I had always thought usher to be a title or position of helpfulness... not unlimited power! I remember my friend who ushered at the same time: his parents were missionaries to Jamaica so he was so chill. He'd sometimes climb up on top of the coke/Pepsi machines and chat as people came to get a drink...needless to say, he didn't move up the food chain of ushers lol. I could tell Brother Pentecost had zero idea what to do with a free spirit like Matt, even though Matt was the picture of kindness, respectful and a great Christian lol... I'm glad Jesus loves us all. I'll never forget my time feeling like i had inadvertently joined the Church Police 😂

[@mikesimonson7860]

I’m surprised the “church police” didn’t detain a church greeter avoider!

[@kevinsullivan3448]

Whipping out the Asp to respond to the Nursery escape was so funny.

[@gunwrencher1566]

I thought it was going to be a Taser.

[@beakyturf6336]

"He brews" might be the greatest coffee shop joke of all time.

[@agnestshi2269]

Mister "Green" not giving $$ 😂😂 Officers James and John 😂

[@holycrap0866]

I quit attending church 3 years ago. They became woke and all they really cared about was money. When I joined the pastor was 3/4 finished going page by page with his message. After finishing he turned to weekly guilt trips on increasing offerings by 10% every yearly quarter. 40% a year would be a strain on my income as a retiree. Just like politics…….it’s about the Benjamin’s not GOD!!!!

[@Uneedhelp91]

I hope you find another church home! Not every church is like that, sometimes the smallest churches are the best.

[@kathrynsmith3417]

How I love "Church Police," Babylon Bee does great service to protect worshippers while down on their knees in prayers. Here in Winter Garden, FL there police officers, sons of police officers, armed to protect us Church Ladies to church, during services, & back to our vehicles.

[@jorgergonzalezvisualartist8925]

I’m sharing this with our “Welcoming” team at my Church!!

[@davidcurtis5398]

Welcoming team - good... Church police or church safety team - stupid...

[@rowanrobinson1931]

The fact that he has an AWANA badge on 🤣🤣

[@rockzalt]

An excellent training video for any church concerned with the pastoral care of their parishioners! 10/10 A must see!

[@hiskidkeller]

What is a parishioner?

[@Avix04]

Nearly split a seam laughing at that "the first shall be last segment". God bless y'all!

[@barbridingsTheResinator]

Thank you, Church Police, for your service. You brave souls

[@frankfreeman1444]

When you said you are part of your church security then "I don't know" there was no need to go further. You've said it all.

[@kodamooshface1108]

Laughing is just better for all around health. You guys are always cracking me up. Well done, again!

[@urfavalyy]

I loled when they knocked him down with the offering plate

[@skyttyl]

Beaned him with the offering plate. Twice i lost it. Lol

[@lacssj6134]

He-brews. Holy Grounds. Hilarious.

[@fifthrider]

Awesome, a new episode of Church Police. I haven't seen this since 1972 when Michael Palin was the Detective Parson.

[@earnestbrown6524]

Good boys, Good boys whatcha gonna do? Whatcha gonna do when they pray for you?

[@AmessengerofChrist]

😂 Gold

[@margaretmarr1]

Thank you for that! Hysterical!

[@user-HellcatHemi]

I have a hard time finding anything better than these guy's & I'm here for & support it UNCONDITIONALLY 💯❤❤🤣🤣

[@cb2000a]

In all seriousness a big thanks to the armed security that protects the saints in church at the posslible cost of their own lives.

[@Objective-Observer]

Y'all had way tooooo much fun with that. lol.

[@bigpappahemi4263]

Don't question my authoritah, it come strait from above!

[@lisarodriguez2926]

I wonder if they can arrest the pope since he's breaking so many laws...mmmmm?

[@tempvssolvs]

"They're not even open on Sundays... they're not even open on Sundays!!!!"

[@davidsprayberry827]

This was gold. GOLD!

[@mynala110]

“Heathen visitors” 😂😂😂😅😅😅

[@KeeganTerp-sl7bx]

Protecting the Church and Donuts 🍩😂😂😂

[@keepingthefaith9041]

Thank God, They are on the Job. They just made our Churches SO MUCH SAFER, & Hollier. 😄 🤣 😂

[@broseph3210]

The people who park in the visitor parking are truly despicable

[@kevinwiens4804]

...uh unless they're visitors???

[@Laughy-Flaaffy]

Please make more of these episodes haha

[@kathleenkirchoff9223]

You need to add a serious word about the crazy bill before Congress that would ban church security teams as Paramilitary militias.

[@justforever96]

But militias aren't illegal.

[@mattdickson382]

As a member of my church's security team, I think we can really learn a lot from these guys. The last scene where he extends the ASP to respond to an escaped toddler was great.

[@realimjustjoshing]

He has the AWANA Sparks Badge with every gem on it. This man has earned the right to be a Church Police!

[@bobwehadababyitsaboi103]

I love it and I'm glad i am a Traditional Catholic! We love you, our separated brothere!!

[@ericmsandoval]

THIS WAS INCREDIBLE 🤣🤣🤣

[@dna9783]

Lol when he threw the offering plate at the runner. 😅

[@jenniferbailey5838]

The offering plate!! 😂😂

[@lucialindeboom1382]

Thanks! It’s brilliant! 🤩 so truthful that it’s almost not funny anymore… 😂😂❤

[@Sniper--tf3qt]

You're kidding me right, as somebody who has actually been threatened to be killed in this position I find your comment is very uneducated and stupid.

[@crazyassbobb]

Looking forward to this movie/show, looks better than most things coming out these days 😂🤣

[@ifeomanwandu4841]

The rod to deal with the breakout in childcare room 3 caught me off guard 😂😂😂

[@michelemarie8346]

I LOVE THIS! Please continue Church Police!

[@KiwiKoNZ]

It’s tough when you tithe online … The looks of others are quite condemning 😅 👋🤨👉💵

[@citizensnips2400]

I’m sure you guys had this filmed a while ago, but the timing of this couldn’t be worse. The fact that you guys had the balls to go through with it makes it that much funnier 🤣

[@OldsmobileCutlass1969Va]

How is it bad timing?

[@davidkelkins510]

Keep separating the sheep from the goats; it's your calling, guys.

[@longrider188]

Thank God! The Bee broke down and gave us actual Christian comedy. It's a rare thing these days. Please do more!

[@letsgoooobrandon]

We need Church police now!!

[@jalmodov7817]

2:51 Officer, I'd like to report a sin...

[@picard714]

Bad Cop & Bad Cop...in service of the Lord Jesus Christ. And I'm here for it...

[@WALTERBROADDUS]

👮🏼‍♂️👮🏻‍♀️⛪Church Police! Instead of Adam-12, the call sign is, John-3:16....

[@m_e_c_k]

Please do more episodes!!!

[@imno1special]

I am literally planning to plant a new church this year and once we begin having morning services, I will ensure that free coffee, tea, hot choco, and donuts from a small local donut shop are given away! But for the night services, there will deff be a not-for-profit coffee house and christian bookstore next to the hangout area where everyone can fellowship for a few hours before and after the services and events. "Church" is just a place to meet with other believers and a discipleship building. There needs to be healthy and low cost food present for proper fellowship! I learned that when I was dirt poor in college and got to snack on junk at church 😁 We will have free organic bagels for everyone over 26... so it's "healthy"... I already found the christian coffee companies!!! Just waiting on God to provide the building and some cattle on a thousand hills to pay for it and you're all welcome for free breakfast. "Come for the Donuts, stay for the Jesus"? Good? Ya, just thought of that... Im reading the comments on this vid to see if Holy Grounds or HeBrews has more votes! 🤣 But seriously, I am planning to plant a church soon and will give away the pastries and drinks for morning services so people who of course were running late to church can know that they can skip the healthy meal at home and receive free carbohydrates to get them through till lunch.

[@Gzusiz4u]

And the free breakfast can benefit the homeless and hungry in the church's vicinity too!

[@imno1special]

Haha. I wouldnt be on the Bee if I was one of "those" types. I do however want to keep the diabetics and otherwise overweight people on their diets! Been there... a year ago, I was doing 2-4 donuts a day and gained 20lbs in about 3 months... I was forced about a month ago to quit sugar pretty much cold turkey amd I've lost 8lbs and got my lowest blood pressure reading today actually with no bp meds! So, just planning to feed the flock without forcing them to eat the junk that those 20yr olds can eat all day with their fancy metabolisms and elastic skin... I dont know who jim Jones but I am a strict Bible purist so there will only be chapter by chapter and verse by verse through the entire Bible which leaves no room for current ideological subversion and weak doctrines for sure. But there does have to be donuts! (I will absolutely find an excuse to sneak one when I can!)

[@Gzusiz4u]

I think he meant my comment. Im not of that inclusive type either. Quite the opposite. But, I worked at a church in Florida next to a freeway and the homeless men would come in for free donuts and coffee and several gave their life to Jesus and the pastor helped a few who were serious to get in to better situations. So, if ur people there can handle the lack of a recent shower, might help get some more souls in the Kingdom! 🙏

[@Gzusiz4u]

Oh, and I am voting for Holy Grounds! Jim Jones was some cult leader from the hippie generation who made everyone drink tainted koolaid. Come to think of it, the sister of a girl at my old church said something about not eating the donuts or coffee with a reference to not drinking the koolaid... so maybe there is some distrust of the populace towards free beverages at churches? I dont know. I gotta say that if I was picking out a church today, i would rank importance as Church Police Force, Scriptural teaching, Donuts, quality of music, and Im adding a new one on a serious note... lack of people wearing all black holding cameras on the stage getting super closeups of the musicians and lighting... that is just annoying and distracting! If there was a church that had free bacon with the donuts and orange juice... ya know what, I think I'll just stop at Waffle House or Buccees on the way to church and just hope the church police had their coffee that morning. Yea. That solves all my issues right there! "The only thing I contribute to my salvation is the sin which made it neccesary."

[@vito_reacts]

Thank you Church Police, we appreciate you 🙏🏾

[@Isaac-xs7tx]

You now serve the maximum sentence, 6 months served in the nursery

[@quicksilverxt]

This was epic! Do more please! 😂😂😂😂

[@bobkaiser8782]

Whenever I find a good parking spot, I always assume Jesus wanted me to park there.

[@guygirard4274]

Awesome video , I kinda want some more

[@solacemusic242]

I gasped when you tackled Emma!

[@soundpreacher]

This needs to be a series. I want merch!

[@amandalynnlucarini9517]

I guessed Holy Grounds before she did. But He Brews is a next level church cafe name.

[@oldsarge8608]

I am on our church security team and love it that Bee makes fun of everyone. Still laughing! Keep it up.

[@LordBobbert]

The Sparkies badge is SENDING me! 😂

[@lukaschin1038]

fr though those who park in visitor parking are genuinely the worst

[@charles8601]

They've changed a bit since the 1500s in Spain!

[@rager1969]

As a teen, I would sometimes ditch the afternoon services with the son of one of the ministers and there was a guy that would drive around looking for us. I suspected he was looking for an excuse to ditch services, himself.

[@pmc2999]

I grew up in a small town church. It was too small for church cops. But people did sit in the same pew every Sunday. We made exceptions for visitors. But if you were a member and did not abide by the law of the pew, you would be seriously shunned.😂😂😂