The Dark Side of Christian Diet CULTure

[@pamb6590]

For me, the self condemnation comes from KNOWING how to lose weight but not having the mental and emotional energy to do the work. I am a full time caretaker of my mom with Alzheimer’s. She is thriving under my care but I am not.

[@lindajones6835]

It is super difficult to lose weight even without the stress and burden you are under. Jesus knows and sees. He understands your heart. Don’t condemn yourself. All caregivers will have some of the biggest rewards in Heaven, I am sure of it!!!

[@essieaku3563]

May the Lord Jesus give you strength, bring you through this hard season and reward your self-sacrificing Spirit. You will NEVER regret doing the right thing,THIS TOO SHALL PASS!🙏🕊💕🌈🔥

[@finchsparrowbird]

STOP trying to lose weight. Throw the whole idea off a cliff. Stress is, in fact, the worst offender for gaining & maintaining cortisol fat. Ask Him, instead, to line your path with abundant opportunities to prioritise & provide self-care *for a healthy body*. Everything else follows, but it takes time! You deserve it, even if it take a lifetime for you to discover this!

[@Uniquelyulifecoaching]

@lindajones6835 I understand that. I walked through some of that with my father in law. The easiest thing to do is to invite the Lord into the process of walking in the fruit of the spirit and self control. Our mind is so incredibly powerful. That’s just how God designed it. Taking things 1 day at a time and in your case maybe 1 moment at a time. Staying present when you want to eat out of emotion. Praying God will give you supernatural care giver strength. 🙏🏻

[@amberlow4594]

I needed this! Thank you! I have battled with my weight, being obese, struggling with everything that comes with that, and questioning my calling because of it, my whole life! I have been overweight since I can remember(stemming from childhood trauma). All through school, comments from kids, even teachers, about my weight, reinforced the lies that I believed about myself. At home, there were certain family members that would make it their "mission" to make sure that I was always moving, eating right, eating less, and follow it up with pats on my stomach with the remark, "if you would just lose this tummy, you'd look so much better." And the church...from the Weigh Down, to Prisms, to TOPS, to WW...they all preached the same thing, God loves you, but He'd love you more if you were skinny! When I was 18, I was in a discipleship program, and the female leader of the program pulled me into her office one day, and told me that I couldn't participate in any of the outreach programs because my size was 'too distracting from what God was trying to do'. Let me tell you, the enemy jumped on that right away, and started whispering to me constantly, "God can't use you because you are fat. And if God can't use you, He doesn't love you. And if God doesn't love you, how do you expect a man to love you?" I let those lies hold me back from so much in my life. They were further reinforced by others "speaking" into my life. I was receiving pastoral counseling from one of the woman pastors in my church, and she was always focused on my weight, in every session that we had. The final straw for me was when she asked me to go to a few men that were in my life, and ask them if when they had met their spouse, if she had looked like me, if they would have still married her?! She was, and I quote, "trying to help me understand that even Christian men don't want fat wives, and no one will be able to see past my weight!" Again, the enemy jumped on those lies, and ramped up the guilt and depression, to the point where I had contemplated if God couldn't use me, then I must not have a purpose in life, so what's the point in being here anymore. Thankfully, my lead pastor still believed in me, believed in the calling that God has placed on my life, and made/let me keep leading worship, even when it was a SACRIFICE of praise every week for about 2 yrs. I am still obese. I recognize it. I'm not ignoring it. In fact, I am in counseling to try to untangle all these lies and traumas that have contributed to where I am now. But, I know that I know that I know that I am a daughter of the Most High, a daughter of the Star-Breather, and He has called me to serve Him, to lead His church in worship. Do I still doubt myself, doubt my calling? Absolutely! I'm human! But, I know that I am loved just as I am, and that comparison is the #1 thing that will keep me from doing what God has called me to do! So I just try to live and walk in grace, and work daily on myself, surrendering all that I am to Him. Thank you, Rita! Thank you for sharing your heart, for sharing the Lord's heart! ❤

[@bemoguy]

I'm a 60 year old man, and I can remember my pastor dad talking to colleagues and other family members about my weight (I was very obese as a child from the age of 6, some of which I strongly suspect was because of shame from sexual abuse and experimentation from neighborhood boys) while I was there, as if I wasn't even in the room. Mind you, he was very obese himself! Go figure! It was hurtful and downright galling! Neighborhood kids were very cruel and ugly towards me, that it took time for me to let go of the rage and hurt. It's only in the last near 6 years since my wife and I started eating ketogenic that I experienced significant and lasting, healthy weight loss. I went from 495 pounds to about 285. I'm still overweight, but my severe depression was rolled back to the point that I could ditch my antidepressants, and my brain fog burned away for the most part! I still have about 100 pounds to go, but I'll get there. My wife (who has battled weight all of her life as well) and I joined a gym and I go almost every day. I have never been so determined to physically become the best version of myself physically that I can.

[@ericadobbins4625]

From the bottom of my heart, thank you for this! I was always the "thick/curvy girl" too. Even in high school as an athlete and being fit, I felt like an Amazon next to my size 2 friends while I was rocking a 12. That and criticism from my own family fueled my food addiction and lack of care for myself.... because why care if I can be an athlete and still 190 lbs and 3 times bigger than my friends? That was my mentality for years. It's only in the last few years (I'm 38) that I've realized I was built with a larger body type. Now finally losing the weight I wish I'd never gained in adulthood, there are new people inserting themselves triggering old wounds. Pray for me, I'm working those out with Jesus. But people really DO say TOO MUCH and love to insert themselves where they are not wanted or needed. This is a listen for everyone.

[@Agoraz123]

Thank You so much for this Rita! My church doesn’t say anything about the way I look but I have such a self hate that I’m never ok with me, and Im 63! I’m going to re-listen to this and really ask God to help me see myself through His eyes. ♥️

[@MMLZombie]

I just felt like I wanted to say something about this. I struggled with self hate most of my life and the ways the enemy twists the truth of who we are is mind boggling. But it's all lies. The truth is that God has endowed all of his daughters and all ppl with beauty that comes from his image. And this is more than just metaphorical, inner beauty, but it's also physical. There was an interesting study decades ago that attempted to research the differences between what women focus on when we look in the mirror versus what men focus on when they look in the mirror. The research found that women--no surprise--focus on what we perceive as our flaws. But men actually look in the mirror and tend to focus on what they perceive as their assets. This is of course a generalization but I still think it's interesting. We women need to learn from men in this regard and start looking in the mirror and focusing not on what's not perfect but on what is imperfectly perfect. We need to focus on our own assets and see, and actually appreciate our own beauty. I think that may even open up a moment of worship, recognizing the beauty that God has made of and in our own body, that it's his very good creation

[@MarySmith-gd7bj]

I knew and it was already ingrained into by the age of 3. “They love me cause I’m pretty”. Terrible, been up and down since son’s illness and death.

[@angeleav]

U guys commenting are amazing people. I never thought u could find so much vulnerability in one place. Its awesome cause its exactly what the world needs, humility and faith, clean hearts🙏

[@vald1607]

I think I am at a stage where I can say: I am ok. Loooong journey in many battles. Thank you for being transparent. It helps others.

[@jessieg4901]

I really value you Rita, and the Gift you are to the Body of Christ! I struggled with anerexia all my teen years for the most part, and I’m so happy you’re having this conversation!

[@danilove63]

This is a beautiful conversation, and I thank you for opening it up! I am disabled and I find time, and time, and time again… I hear stories of other disabled people feeling completely shamed and shunned because of their body differences in the church!

[@madi8330]

I had a lady in my church come up to me recently and say "so... is it a boy or a girl?" and I said "excuse me?" and she replied with "You look pregnant, your breasts are different! And I had a dream you were pregnant", I said "no haha it's not a boy or a girl it's nothing!" and her final comment was "well you're carrying like a girl!" (I am NOT pregnant. I'm married, 25 years old, but have gained 13-15 kilograms due to a season battling depression and anxiety, losing my dad to cancer, and navigating an auto-immune disease). I am not angered by what she said, if anything, I find it hilarious that she was so "bold" ? to approach me (with zero tact hahaha). I am trying to push into Jesus and receive a revelation of the SACREDNESS of my body and not hating it and feeling so uncomfortable in my body, understanding that it has been through 3-4 years of trauma. I'm trying to be intentional with my eating and exercising but also being HAPPY. Also a HUMBLING season where God is showing me that I do in fact still place superficial value in my appearance and attatching it to my calling in ministry.

[@dimaryriveraguerrerasnatio709]

So sad! Thank you for this , I always suspected it but hearing it is such an eye opener!

[@maryanddon77]

Thank you for tackling this difficult topic without condemnation. ❤❤❤❤

[@heathersheartco]

I remember this diet back in the 1990s and this was super popular at my church. I remember there was a weigh down diet group of ladies and we would meet once a week. Thank God he saved me from that.

[@considerthebirds]

This is such an important topic and you’ve been so well spoken on it. Thank you so so much for putting your voice and experience and wisdom out for us. God bless you, Rita! ❤

[@etsyeverything]

Have you interviewed Jason Upton? He would be AWESOME! And you should totally do a worship session with him. Between the two of you, the roof would blow off : )

[@TDLSP]

THIS is so so so good!! And it blows my mind that leaders will basically say that it’s more godly to be a vegetarian, or eat raw, or blah blah blah. Freedom isn’t bondage. My friend was on staff at a church directly under the pastors wife who was a size 2. My friend wasn’t anywhere near obese but not skinny either. The pastors wife cleaned out her closet and brought my friend her clothes. She needed to meet the goal of what to wear and what size to be. THAT is bullying.

[@laurie9993]

No it can be motivation if accompanied w kind words. I would take free clothes

[@aceloria]

Thank you... this is so good... It's making me re-frame so much of the nonsense that has been spoken to me as abusive. I've personally responded with super thick skin and taking the "rebel" position of making people like me anyway - or recognizing my talent/anointing/skill regardless. I remember one A&R type conversation with an artist and how hard he tried to make me hate myself or even cry. I just let him go on about my body as long as he felt like it. Finally he realized that I could take the abuse and let it go... supposedly to show me what I was going to face in the industry. I honestly believe the whole irrational expectations of Christian single men for the women they would deign to marry is rooted in the "hot wife" culture that is super-prevalent in the church now. I caught myself looking to the screens on the side of the stage yesterday to make sure I didn't look too bad on screen. UGH!

[@JanuarySquires]

So much of the "pastor's prerogative" is the reason so many are falling away from God. Thank you so much for sharing your experiences and speaking about these things. You have been an inspiration to me for many years and I am super pumped about your podcast!

[@amycraig132]

I find it so difficult to trust what God thinks over what I think about myself. And then when you have people look at you like you have two heads or treat you like you have the plague…it feels hopeless. Being a 49 yo single woman (knowing that my weight probably contributes greatly to that) fitting in at church (that is so family oriented) is so difficult. It’s like they just don’t know what to do with me. It really hurts. Thank you for talking about this. At least I know I’m not alone.

[@DaybeesMoore-pq3bd]

This was such a great video. I love your raw transparency. The church needs more real conversations about this and lots of other topics. So many churches are for people who fit the mold: married, with kids, able to serve, beautiful, not damaged. We need to do better.

[@peggycuomo1877]

Another great podcast, thank you!!

[@pattijohnson1424]

Yes, menopause and the weight issues that have come with it!

[@RoisinPabey]

Great episode Rita!!

[@bemoguy]

Although I'm a guy, I find your program very relatable in many ways, and I appreciate it immensely!

[@Kinderteacherlady]

I also did the way down diet. I attended a group and did lose 90 pounds by just eating when I was hungry stopping when I was comfortable. I remember when I was getting ready to sign up for another cycle of the group the Holy Spirit whispered to me no, you’re not to sign up again. I was nonplussed because I still had a lot of weight to lose, and still do. He didn’t offer me any explanation, but years later, I curiously looked up Gwen Shamblin, and was shocked to see the crazy doctrine and were the only ones who are saved statements. I then knew oh, Holy Spirit knew they were going off and he protected me from it. It was shocking when I watched the documentary. I’m so glad he saved me from that. You are right Rita, there is definitely definitely underlying issues that are more important than the physical manifestation of excess weight, I am still crying out to God for deliverance. I weigh a lot less than I used to, but I still have a lot more to lose to be comfortable in my skin because as I age it’s harder to carry excess weight in the proportions that I am carrying.

[@Uniquelyulifecoaching]

I felt the principles like eating when hungry and stopping with satisfaction were spot on. It’s how I still eat and I’ve not done traditional diets in well over 5 years with no regain. We are born with God given cues, we don’t have to teach babies to stop eating or get hungry. The rest is renewing our minds to what Gods word says about food and life’s circumstances. He has a perfect plan and an abundant life for you sister!!

[@Tracey..H]

I’ve had ppl try to CAST out gluttony. Never again

[@bloggerbriii]

Wow! Unbelievable! 😔

[@Tracey..H]

@@bloggerbriii I agree!!! Just nutty

[@lydloved]

I did the Way Down Diet. It had some principles that were really helpful: bringing God into my relationship with food, focusing on physical cues like hunger, mindfulness with food and removing morality from food.

[@lizhamm5442]

I am glad it helped you and you were able to take good from it. I would have to caution others on it as unfortunately as that movement progressed, it became very problematic and cultish 😢

[@Uniquelyulifecoaching]

Yes those were grate principles and it drew me closer to the Lord. I still follow those principles but let the other things that were taught go. I didn’t throw the baby out with the bath water. But I for sure didn’t keep following WDW. I went by the church that it still there in Franklin a few weeks ago. It was very odd feeling I got. Pray those people will be set free.

[@Heaven_t_earth]

Going by scripture, we must only eat foods that are created by God not man. Not processed foods made in a lab which is most any precooked food at the grocery store. To honor our body as his temple. Food addiction is more likely to happen with these processed foods, like sugar, seed oils & artificially flavors. Sometimes we can still binge on Whole Foods, which I had struggled with. we must remember that greed is a sin & so is laziness, to be at a healthy weight honors God & his creation.

[@kristina_zaika8880]

This is so good ❤️‍🔥

[@Heaven_t_earth]

Food addiction & obesity are more so in the category of other addictions like alcoholism. Not like a deformed person who had an accident.

[@sandrasanders706]

I read the book and tried the diet. Lasted about a few days😅 But to see her deny the Trinity and start her own culty church was just stunning. And people still attend???!!!..😮

[@almostemptynester777]

who are you referring to?

[@sandrasanders706]

​@almostemptynester777 Gwen Shamblin who wrote the Weigh Down Diet in the late 80's and it's products. Then some years later, she denied the Trinity, divorced her husband and started her own church which became a cult. She and her second husband, died in a plane crash in 2022.

[@youthfulflower7192]

@@almostemptynester777Gwen Shamblin from Weigh Down. She has passed away. Her and her husband.

[@AshleyLoveland1739]

Yes do something about self deception please

[@finchsparrowbird]

This episode is critical listening for every person in ministry. The time is sssoooo short for true Christians to 👏get👏it👏right. The wheat from chaff sifting is coming. We need to call-out brothers and sisters in the Church to consciously ID their expectations as cultural OR Christian. There is no in-between! They need to check their harmful language & actions one-on-one with the Lord, first. If it ain't Christian, trash it!

[@Uniquelyulifecoaching]

I did the weigh down program in the 90’s and it was helpful in some ways but a lot of condemnation. Then all that went down after I stopped. Now I can truly say I walk in freedom with weight but it was out of a love from the Father and Holy Spirits leading.

[@tinahufnagel9317]

I also did the Weigh Down Workshop in the 90s and I eventually lead classes as well. The original video series contained a great deal of humility and a genuine love of the Lord. I still have those VHS tapes. I think it started from a good place but then became corrupted over time. Perhaps the seeds of it were there at the beginning but I didn't detect it. But then the Advanced course came out and a definite change took place at that point. In the end, I think it's a cautionary tale for all of us in ministry as this pattern happens more than we'd like to admit to. We all know of many ministries that started out with good intentions but didn't end that way. My hope is in the fact that the Lord knows the details and He'll sort it all out one day.

[@kristyj2695]

The weight down video series was so sad. I have been overweight most of my adult life, including the last 15 years I’ve been divorced. This is not a new issue for me Sadly, many single Christian women will not be proposed to because of the this issue, Which is ridiculous and displays immaturity spiritually and emotionally.

[@finchsparrowbird]

Happily, the Lord will turn their situation for good, giving them beauty for ashes. Some He will use to marry unchurched folk to bring closer to Him. Others he will enable to marry newly converted, older, wiser, and more experienced men who know their own worth in Him and marry accordingly. There are many men who value the heart over the appearance. Many, He will keep beautifully single and enable into His power and strength in our communities. Marriage has become a Demigod to too many churches. Our value is determined by the Lord. Only. Our value is *not* determined by our "marriageability". ✋️

[@laurie9993]

Not always true-have seen overweighted ladies proposed to by like men and they are 100% happily married, someone who "understands ❤

[@Bishop472]

Praying for a god fearing woman to become one flesh with amd a helper. A woman who wants to serve Jehovah our god and a woman who wants to do what's right.....🙏

[@juliefickess2024]

Age too!!!

[@catiehinkle8616]

❤❤

[@chosen8031]

I have noticed many pastors bringing up scripture about wt. I kinda feel sure say it and move on but allow the holy spirit to deal with the individuals. Alot of pastors also seem to judge anyone who is over wt even if they dont know what is causing it. They almost assume they r over eating when its not always that. ITS NOT OK

[@elizabethmcnamara6548]

I don't like people being mean to someone just because they are "fat". Like weight goes up and down all the time.

[@benanakalika9224]

❤Amen

[@laurie9993]

We all like aesthetcs; looking at a slim worship leader, man or woman generally pleases our brain. Exception: if they SING w excellence/skill, this helps outweigh the overweight disadvantage, thanks

[@11candy11]

This is interesting, but I find the opposite to be true. And I'm not talking about being a size 3 model, or obsessing about weight here... but so many women think God promised them a marriage, that God is sending them a husband, (Like He's going to put a spell on the man and he won't see who's in front of him). God's blessings and promises are not witchcraft. We all have free will. Of course, there are exceptions, (some men are attracted to heavier women). But in general, men are not attracted to overweight women. And visa versa. God won't force a man to fall in love with a woman, because she believes she has a "promise" from God. It's called "free will." Most women understand it's good to be clean, neatly dressed (again, i'm not talking about dressing expensively) but they seem to think God will have the man overlook that she's extensively overweight. And then these women keep asking God why He hasn't brought them their "promise." It's called denial. And it leads to inappropriate bitterness toward God. Again, i'm not talking about being "perfect" by any means, but simply being our best. And this goes for men too. However, it seems to be a real denial issue with so many women.

[@elizabethmcnamara6548]

Thin people that "eat whatever and not gain weight" are full as well. They are gluttons as well as the fat people but the fat people get judged harshly.

[@RCGWho]

I seldom hear gluttony or obesity addressed in the church. And it's not just obviously obese people that overeat. I've been a solid sugar addict while only about 20 lbs overweight. What about obviously anorexi or bullimic people. Just leave everyone alone? I worked at the Peppermill in Reno in the 80s. It was understood, although not technically legal, that they only hired young, attractive, fit women. I was 21, moderately attractive, and thin enough (but muscular). I was no wear near as s3xy as the cocktail waitresses, but I was in banquets, so they tolerated me. I'm now 56, 5 ft 2, and 165ish pounds post menopausal. Does it hurt my feelings that they would never hire me now? No. I'm not unreasonable and I know that ship has sailed. The guy who told you that you needed to lose weight was mostly not wrong and he didn't say it because he was in sin. You asked him and he told you. Guys are more fact than feelings oriented typically. Men have this automatic rating system when they look at a woman. Yes, I would sleep with her. No, I would not. It's autopilot. Maybe with sanctification, they could stop the thought process. But guys do have types, and for most guys it's thin, but not skeletal. Curvy, but not lumpy. There are certainly men that like large(r) women, but it's statistically rarer. I did some searching on reddit recently to see what men would say their ideal woman was. It was fascinating as it was all over the map. It could be redhead and green eyes, great rear, great laugh. It could be fit and brown hair and a great smile. It could be funny, smart, and great conversationalist. Etc Most emphasized rears. Most were more indifferent about breast size than you'd might think . Less were enamored with the perfect blond barbie ideal. It is true most like minimal makeup. It made me realize you really do just need to be yourself because predicting and trying to become some guy's ideal is not possible .

[@godandgardening]

A man free from the spirit of lust and pornography is not going to allow those thoughts in his head. They are from the enemy. Rating woman as doable or not shows that he is seeing her as an object of pleasure not someone made in Gods image. Lots of men free from lust that would refuse to play with one of those thoughts. Not to mention a man is told by Jesus that if he even looks at a woman with lust he has already done it in his heart.

[@RCGWho]

​@@godandgardeningI'm just relaying how it was described to me. You can simplify it down to attraction: swipe right or swipe left.

[@MMLZombie]

​@godandgardening I agree. Dudes in their flesh will outright dehumanize women by relegating us to having value in their eyes only according to our sexiness. And I know that Jesus is not about that. I think the church has tolerated that fleshly, worldly thinking too long and it can often feel like the brotherhood protecting its own. More women in the Church need to speak truth into this. And it's also destructive to men. They miss the real value of, and consequently reconciliation to, half the population, not to mention this kind of fleshly objectification of women is exactly what enforces dudes' struggles with pornography. The church will preach against porn engagement as a behavior, and often against the lust at its root, but lust is only one root. I've never heard a sermon, at least preached by a man, that emphasized the intrinsic worth or authority or equal standing of women. Closest we seem to get is a sentimental message on mother's day. I think until the church breaks the mould of the world in this respect and finally recognizes the inherent value, power and co-authority of women apart from our roles as sex partner and child bearer, and the expectation of our role as supporting actress to a man's center stage performance, we're unfortunately going to continue to see movements like this

[@laurie9993]

Hi Rita friendly fyi: The weighty man will have problems dating a normal weighted wonan. It goes both ways 🌈 ❤

[@howyabendoin]

Absolutely. I had way more "success" when I was younger because I was skinnier. Girls are attracted to me but when they see my belly they're like nuh-uh. A smile goes to being completely ignored. It is what it is.

[@laurie9993]

Sorry about that... Best we can all do for ourselves is eat clean/exercise the best we can. Its a drag! Except no one can do it but you. You are your own best advocate.. Good luck 🌈 !

[@howyabendoin]

@@laurie9993 Thanks! Yeah, I’m definitely working on that. Like Rita I’ve dealt with an injury that’s caused me to be less active. It’s not a total excuse, but it’s meant a very important component of losing weight has been severely limited for me over recent years. Thank God I’ve had progress though. I think men and women have become pickier whereas before we all would’ve been ok with a little extra weight on a potential mate.

[@laurie9993]

​@@howyabendoinhi howy yea its probably internet facebook and such making us pickier and more visually prone. Keep at it, health increases w each workout big or small

[@Tracey..H]

Some Christian doctrine is harmful.

[@considerthebirds]

So true, and it’s not truly holy or Christian if it’s harmful.

[@finchsparrowbird]

No. Cultural expectations and behaviours masquerading as Christian Doctrine is the harm, and evil. The problem is the immense volume of behaviours we all allow to be called Christian in our communities. The destruction is real.

[@JANAlifestylevlogger]

so is bitterness and unforgiveness

[@KimberlyFrazee]

Mac Donald's doesn't use real meat

[@laurie9993]

If people knew what was in it, and what it DOES to the human body, they wouldn't touch it. McDonalds is a fat deception by industry to make $