The INTJ Command Mode

[@chefmarcos]

This video and this comment section make me feel like I just walked into a secret society that I have been a member of my entire life.

[@INTJIsland]

Welcome home. :-)

[@KozhirEthicalHplus]

INTJs are exactly like that unless they worked on themselves too hard to be able to communicate perfectly as a normal human being not as an image of personality. I have a friend who is INTJ and he did many things and now he can communicate with others as the right person -ever!- to be or communicate with. He is knowledgeable and he is INTJ only for himself and his life. On the other hand, me, you have said enough about me. when i am speaking even when i say something funny my friends or relatives get what i said as a logical fun not as a normal or natural funny statement. The objectivity of INTJs and their confidence is like hell.. And it is because they're true to their word deeply inside. And this "being true" nature gives them confidence, objectivity, power, skilfulness and more.. always when i listen to myself on a recorded audio or video i get shocked no Matter what or how i was. And it is all because one thing.. I speak, think, live and do all things that exist in this world.. Just in my mind. Even when i do some activities outside my mind, they're still included to my mind. Sometimes people tell me to get out of my head and live as a normal person -as if i were an alien-. But they have no idea that everything is a singular nature to me and i can see things that others can't and of course this caused by the introverted-intuition as the primary cognitive function which is deeply focused internally. This nature of INTJs has many weakness according to the social conditionings.. But if only they could to organise this nature they can transcend like hell and become a charisma for civilisations not just their community. I know few INTJs, male and female. If only they started to speak.. everyone will follow. Just because they maintained an ideal charisma state but yet they won't drop it out and not taking a step without a specific and truthful reason.

[@miguelirm]

Kozhir White aa

[@dennisjonker4804]

I think that because of the INTJ's propensity on being objectively focused and typically verbally skilled, we indeed tend to not pay attention to how stern or loquacious we can sound. That last one often gets others amused. They find my serious disposition amusing. Even if I do not explicitly intend to have that idea come over as such. Maybe Command Mode is just another term for "we are efficient", and being Thinkers above Feelers (Te-Fi), we may come off rather cold, be it unintentional. I personally get more people offended or disturbed by my Death Stare, which rarely actually belies anger, but just my mind being in operational efficiency mode and processing vast properties of data. Haha. I often have people ask if I am angry or upset, when I am not at all.

[@INTJIsland]

I imagine if we looked at photos of our faces at different times, we might have the same reaction as I had hearing recordings of my voice. We are focused on other things. As for problems with loquaciousness, often have that pointed out to me as my wife's eyes roll back in her head as I give a long winded statement as to why something she brought up has actually occurred. My son will sometimes trample over what I am saying for the same reason. It takes time to cover a sophisticated idea, and a short attention span on the other end will not allow for that. :-)

[@RazorM97]

@@INTJIsland same problem here, and my voice is lower and heavier because i'm not speaking much, we are not broken, we are just honest inside, we are relaxed but we can't go from being unsocial to social mode quick, we are unprepared and unconscious, i sometimes stutter and have random voice tones sometimes lower(shy) or higher(frustrated) so teachers don't give me attention, there's also one time when a teacher came in the class and asked me why i am so serious ... but i showed her that i can laugh so i did put my will to show her that i'm not sad and prove her wrong, it might of looked silly but it's not fine when the physical aspect is obfuscating feelings at least around other people, my mouth doesn't smile randomly like most people do, it can take years without smiling and i would be just fine, my mouth muscles are often a little bit stuck because of this too(causes me to not be able to be seen by others smiling) and i don't feel too bad because of it in fact i'm happy and not retarded as most others thought of me.

[@Hassanov.a]

I regularly portray an angry or aggressive mood just by virtue of my facial expressions alone, or lack thereof... People ask "Why are you so angry?" I respond with "Huh? I'm not angry." And then I remember my chronic resting bitch face. Really makes making friends difficult because they read into your facial expressions so much and thus I am perceived to be judgemental and unemotional which is ironic because I have high mirror neuron activity which means I can understand people's emotions with startling accuracy. In a nutshell I observe their body language and combine it with the words they speak to produce a simulation of what they must be feeling/thinking based on their current circumstances, to the point where I can literally step into their shoes and feel what they feel, even if I haven't directly experienced it myself, like a parent dying perhaps. Because of this, it makes it very difficult to judge or be mad at someone because I always know why they're behaving a certain way. Even to the point of them thinking I can read their mind and thus they end up being creeped out, haha.

[@rollingthunder55]

I've often heard the term soft spoken with steel behind the words used to describe this in me. Often completely unintentional doing it, just happens when things need to get done. Even accidentally got into an argument with a supervisor over "stepping on his toes" doing it once.

[@iankamanda4067]

Its reasurring to know that I'm not the only one affected by this. I used to think that I was the only who struggled with this challenge, despite working really hard on my communication skills over the years. This often happens to me during heated debates with my sister, so now I'll be even more conscious of what my voice is doing when trying to get a point across.

[@catorce9027]

Thumbs up if you have been described as "tactless" and "insensitive". 👍👍👍Own it. It just means honest and logical. I'll take it.

[@catherinerhea6336]

Yup.... also "Cold".... "Insensitive".... "a slave driver".... "Relentless!!!".... "Callous"... "OBSESSED!!!".... and "downright scary!!!" But.... the issues got effectively resolved and the projects moved forward unimpeded. I smiled on my way home each night. I did own it, and let them keep their "judgements."💜

[@phucyu8428]

I've been told this before. I will occasionally tell people that if I were angry they'd definitely know it. I've even gone so far as to actually get angry and show them the difference. That normally solves that little misunderstanding.

[@ethanf41]

Haha funnily enough the other day I was on the phone with a friend who was not a native English speaker, and she pointed out how serious my English sounded: "like a news presenter". And that was with me being so self conscious as to pre record beforehand how I talked to ensure that I was sounding enthusiastic enough! I've also found from looking that sometimes when I'm uninterested e.g. ordering food, that my face gets very serious and angry, the infamous INTJ death stare. It's a shame because I always try to be polite to strangers, but cringing whenever I so much as say hello can't be a good first impression.

[@V.Hansen.]

Haha. My step daughter put it like this. "You give advice that sound like orders." I definitely have a "tone" problem. I have a hard time hiding even the slightest irritation where my "tone" is concerned. I am aware of it but its probably worse than I think. Worst of all, I would never allow any one to "command" me. Ever. So such a tone is unacceptable in most situations. Yeah, communication isn't my strong point. Communicating ideas, but not feelings.

[@mjr7910]

Been there, done that. When I am very certain about what should be done, I probably come off as commanding. I try to be mindful of that sort of thing.

[@BBeeblebrox]

Yeah, that's me. I was threatened by my senior at work because he thought I was accusing him of being late to come see the patient when I had called him on the extension line. Another time, my friend and I were at a restaurant, I don't remember what exactly, I asked the waiter for something, and my friend asked me not to be so rude, I was shocked that I was being perceived like that! I don't mean to be rude. Sometimes I just don't know how I sound to other people.

[@INTJIsland]

I am continually surprised at how difficult it is to interface with other people on an intellectually level playing field. I try my best to be straight with everyone, without games or masks, and somehow it comes off wrong. Perhaps it stems from going through developmental years without developing the set of people skills that others manage to acquire. We are busy learning about the universe and they are busy learning how to work with or manipulate others smoothly. My wife has hit me with the same thing that your friend hit you with at the restaurant many times. I am rude when I am in no way trying to be. When I try to be rude, there is no doubt in either my mind or the one I am targeting. But that is rare, and only occurs when I feel there is no other choice. A very serious flaw in human interaction is the lack of ability to do what we do naturally: to be honest and straight forward. You are expected to use indirection and tact, which only confuses the issue, but that is what most people seem to want. It is choosing fantasy over reality really. People not only live like that but they choose to live like that. And they wonder why we don't like group activities. :-)

[@ExhumedFromBed]

Oh yes... My peers nicknamed me iceman because of this. I had a natural talent for intimidation. This definitely checks out.

[@kimvelthuis3570]

I got told this many many times by my peers. I'm really commanding and I tend communicate strongly. I do try and better myself on this but still slip once in a while. This makes total sense as an INTJ.

[@catherinerhea6336]

Yeah. Been exactly where you were in your head, yet was told my tone was harsh and almost "command" like. I considered this criticism often, playing the entire situation over countless times in my head, analizing each facet from my side of it. I clearly noticed my intolerance to a careless action, lackadaisical action, and/or incomprehension of what I was saying. My own frustration at any of those usually resulted in me literally taking over the action in the context of "Let me show you what I mean." ....but it took diligence on my part to remember to say it, and attention to the polite aspect of the actual words, and over time, that aspect of my authority stance softened. When younger, working in air force base hangers, I had zero problem with the rigid military protocols, feeling I had finally found a nitch I could function effectively in without being looked at "funny" or tiptoed around. Medical research emulated that rigid conduct in real cleanroom operations, another suitable nitch. Age has softened me considerably!!! I still adhere to strict standards both within operations at my home as well as those within the daily operations of my businesses, but my softened approach to my standard adherence seems to work better with "John Q. Public". 💜

[@INTJIsland]

John Q. Public is a bottomless pit of things to try and understand for me. A few days ago my granddaughter, who is about to start 2nd grade, told me that she thought you could still learn more things after you get out of school. She thought that was a revolutionary idea. I smiled at her and said, "A day is a bad day when I don't learn something new. I am always learning new things; that never stops. School is just the beginning!" I am thinking about doing a video on my weight loss project I began and ran for about 5 years starting in 2001. My wife's web page is about weight loss and I was posting my progress and I documented everything. I got a lot of odd reactions from people who didn't understand my rigid adherence to "the rules" and how I could lock my weight in, exactly where I wanted it to be and hold it there for several years. I didn't budge, or have off days, I just did it exactly by the rules I set for myself, everyday. They called me a machine. That seems to happen a lot to INTJs, eh? :-)

[@catherinerhea6336]

@@INTJIsland BULLSEYE!!! I run a 24-7, 501c3 Wildlife Hospital. I am a "stand-alone," meaning I am not affiliated with any other institution or organization. Holding a Class II license means I also teach wildlife rehab. I am seen by other rehabbers as "Gestapo" because I designed my own protocols for intake & treatment guidelines to benefit the patient, *NOT extract attention or praise from John Q. Public.* Their attitudes mean nothing to me... but my 92% success rate for release does. NYS DEC has had me on call for 5 counties as of 7 years ago, because they no longer question my methods, something other rehab organizations seem rather "green" about. Again, public politics attempts to "control" my actions and I just keep doing what I do in spite of their attitudes. I firmly believe in "sticking to my guns," irregardless of "insolent ignorant pushback" because the outcomes always validate my approach in the end. Stay STRONG and do what YOU KNOW to be right.💜

[@catherinerhea6336]

@@INTJIsland Like you, I have watched people over the years, and one thing remains crystal clear to me: in most cases, our mental capability is viewed as a threat to their self-esteem... How they arrive at this is still a mystery to me, but they do... And when I detect it, I leave it to them & continue quietly. Trying to reason with emotion is futile. I focus on the shift forward my actions are creating... The positive changes I am creating, in the intention that it *WILL* help & "enlighten" others. They may not "get it" now, but eventually they will, one way or another. I am responsible for me & they themselves. They have to want to shift. I stay on course, "steady as she goes" so to speak...💜

[@tommyp8920]

This is exactly me. I didn't realize it until I seen this video.

[@roggies2008]

I think I literally just did this.. it happens a lot when I talk about politics with my dad, also sometimes I am sarcastic and people think I am being serious and it goes way over their head, dry sense of humour I guess. When I started running our business I went into assertive mode because I wanted everything to go well and wanted to keep my authority among staff. It wasn't the most ideal situation I was much younger than all the staff and actually worked their previously (funny story) so I felt I had to overcompensate a bit. I made a few of the girls cry but I wasn't mean I was just blunt and assertive so I could keep control of the situation, maybe I came across more 'command mode' than I thought but personally the other staff had no problems with me because they had no problems with me being in charge. These other girls did and really didn't enjoy being told what to do so I was particularly assertive with them and they just so happened to be rather sensitive too and bit off much more than they could chew in their protest. When I worked their they took advantage of me and this time I wasn't letting that happen since I had power and responsibility now and they most certainly did not like the change and it hit them pretty hard. I didn't enjoy being like that but it was necessary for survival, naturally I am too kind to people and they just use me so every command I had to give to these particular members of staff didn't come easy and was an act, there was just no way I was going to pushed around like they did before but now in my own business. That's exactly it, the "do it now" to your children is how I would go about it, an over compensation to avoid a bad or unnecessary response. One time I remember specifically I said to the most sensitive girl in a commanding way but not shouting or anything just bluntly.. "This needs to be done by 4PM" I think the very "serious face" terrified her the most.. but I would tend to instantly just walk away both for dramatic effect and because I literally found it difficult to be like that and needed to get away before I compromised myself. If you don't want negotiations don't say anything that would make someone presume your open to negotiations it's that simple, that's what my strategy was. Another thing I used to do to protect myself from being taken advantage of is keeping sales representatives waiting for 10 minutes. This really helped them see that I don't consider them important and that they wait for me, and it also gave me an opportunity to catch them off guard and give them a "think" a little bit while they wait which usually throws them off a bit.

[@INTJIsland]

Thanks for sharing that. I wasn't sure if anyone else had run into this. I was the leading petty officer on a US Navy aircraft carrier for the Electronics Communications division, and was in charge of 20 electronics technicians. I hated it. As an INTJ I want to know what to do and then find the best and most efficient way to get it done. I found that most people aren't like that. They need to be not only told what to do, but often they need to be told how to do it. And even when they are told to do it, they may not get it done. You have to follow up on them and keep them moving. I hated that. I had one guy do something that I am still amazed by. We both had duty that day. When you have duty, for 24 hours you cannot leave the ship. You are ON DUTY. He knew this. But he told me, as his supervisor, that he wanted to go home. I told him that he knew he couldn't do that, and if he did it I better not find out about it. Well the next morning he tried to call in sick for the day. I about fell over on the deck when I heard he had done that. He put himself on report by doing that. First, even on a non-duty day you can't call in sick in the Navy. You have to go to sick bay and the medical department makes the call on what you do. Either you work, or they put you in bed, or if it was really bad they'd send you to Portsmouth Naval Hospital. But you don't call in sick, period. But he was on duty, and let the entire chain of command know that he had left the ship without authority. It has been over 20 years since that happened and I am still shocked that this man who was not stupid, did such a stupid thing. I don't understand people and I hate being in charge of them.

[@roggies2008]

Yep, I naturally got stuck in.. but having to think for 5 other people was just horrendous and finding them a job they could do properly was even worse. I was either working to do the important things properly myself so they didn't ruin it and they would slack off or just purposely doing nothing but managing and thinking for everybody else so they didn't. Maybe running a good team is different but when people just come up to you asking the most obvious things that they apparently can't think of themselves it is most tedious.

[@INTJIsland]

That is a very good point. If you had a crew of INTJs (I had a couple techs who were very much like that) it would be no problem supervising them. You only would have to wave your hand in the right direction and the job would get done. In fact they wouldn't want anyone around as they quickly knocked out the work. Sadly, that is not the way most crews work. I never felt like a mastermind who had the whole thing figured out, because having unpredictable people in the equation forced me to toss out all my calculations. Even worse, I was working for a complete loser. When I was leaving the ship, just before I hit the gangway for the last time, my division officer told me that he knew that the issues I had with the chief were all on the chief's head because of the way he was. So, obviously the man wasn't fooling anyone, but he made my life miserable for a time. People!

[@iyquc]

Nice title for this aspect of our common temperament. Never knew my wife hated it until she suddenly abandoned our relationship after almost 20 years. I sincerely wish she'd told me (but she apparently had her own communication [and control] issues as an ENFP). Absent that, I wish that I'd had this insight into my style of communication earlier. You're quite right about the unintentional aspect of it--it's simply our way of being direct when doing so seems fitting. You're also right that it does come in handy with the children! That's definitely an upside, and evidenced in the much better compliance I've always had than their mother has experienced!

[@INTJIsland]

I am sorry to hear about your marriage going south on you. I know how painful that can be. While INTJs appear cold and unfeeling sometimes to the outside world, when we fall in love we fall deeply. Thanks for your kind words and for sharing your thoughts and experiences. My ex-wife completely lost control and turned over custody of our child to my wife and me when my son was in 6th grade. One thing that has pained me all these years still is that when we got divorced, and our son was only 2 years old, she told me that she knew our boy would be far better off with me, but she refused to give me custody. She didn't want to lose the money and the power that having custody gave to her. A narcissist to the end.

[@iyquc]

@@INTJIsland Wow. Tough stuff. Thank you for your empathy, and I am certain that your child had a rich life, despite the sure pain of knowing what your ex did. Thanks again for bouing my spirits a bit--it's still fresh.

[@INTJIsland]

In this video (at 5:44) you see a picture that was taken 40 years ago with my two sons and me. I had just gotten back from 18 months on Midway Island, with my wife and our son, who had been born during that time. I had to go to a a 3 month school before starting my tour of Duty at NAS Lemoore, California, a bit of a drive from where my ex was living with her second (of four) husband(s) with our son. That picture was taken the day I picked him up for a visit for the first time in 21 months and it was the first time the two boys ever saw each other. My Fi was flying around like a eagle that day, to have both my sons in my arms at the same time. I am so sorry you have had to go through such a painful thing. It is in a way like Winston Smith in the book 1984 visiting room 101 and the rats. We avoid our feelings religiously, and yet we have them strapped to a cage on our heads and the door between is slid aside and we have to face them. It is horrible, but it will not go away. My one bit of advice, since it is still fresh: the Fi-Se whirlpool will pass. Take care of your safety and watch for unusual mistakes in decision making during this time. Soon, you will find your feet and it will become an Ni-Te examination of why this happened, and what to do about it for the future. The pain may linger a long while, but it will be a study for your thinking side to puzzle out. That is a lot less painful than facing that rat in a cage. It would have been a lot better for my older boy if I had gotten custody right away, and he developed some unfortunate character traits during those formative years, but overall, you are right, he turned out okay and has done some amazing things. That little 6 year old boy is now 46, and he retired after serving 20 years in the US Navy as an electronics technician and is still working in that same area as a civilian today. I am very proud of him and he gave me a grandson, whom I don't see anywhere near often enough but he is 20 years old now and doing very well. Hang tough and it will get better.

[@sagwillie989]

My wife is ALWAYS on my back for this. I keep telling her I'm a work in progress. It's true, I don't personally realize the depth of piercing laser pointed focus in thought and speech can go. This has gotten me in trouble at work with my superiors many times. I wonder if INTJ run in families. We have three generations in my family that are INTJ. All successive males.

[@INTJIsland]

Even after nearly 43 years of marriage I still have to explain myself to my wife. She knows me, but she doesn't understand what drives me. It makes the process of making up after a disagreement far easier--the fact that she in her heart knows that I didn't mean any harm--but her emotions get caught up in the events and it can get heated. I normally leave the room and come back in a bit when she has calmed down, and we work out the details, without the emotions and all is well. I use that time away to process what happened to see if I can locate the cause of the problem. I usually can and then I use that during the second session, where we put the problem to bed. I think my father was an INTJ. He was consumed by alcohol, which made it harder to know for sure. But when he was sober, he was amazing. He was self-educated, and had insights about the future and the way society was interlocked, that I was able to validate only years later. His father was also an enigma, and may have been one too. But it was all on my dad's side of the family. Mom's side is wired differently.

[@malcohmtryo]

Everyday of my life. I just thought everyone was crazy. Maybe I should listen to myself

[@taipan8021]

This is Factual, they always claim I'm upset when I'm not.

[@chocoboasylum]

Must be my upbringing (or lack thereof) as I don't tend to raise my voice or go against people a lot of the times when they're wrong. If I know they're wrong I'll try to interject once and if they brush my objections aside then I let it go and watch them stumble without caring. It's a passive aggressive streak that I'm working on rooting out.

[@INTJIsland]

I honestly can relate to that very much. It is why seeing myself in action from outside through the videos was, and is, so shocking to me. From the inside I feel like I am just giving my opinion. From the outside I sound aggressive. With my kids I didn't have the option of just walking away, I had a duty to train them properly, but with others it is as you describe. Even with my wife, when I don't want to get into a long discussion, I tend to toss out little comments, bits of sarcasm or verbal nudges, when I want to make a point. But she has been with me long enough to cut right to my intentions, or at least what she thinks they are, and she reacts to them rather than something I said that I thought was clever. It sometimes ends up going in very unexpected directions. I do a lot of that giving my opinion and pointing out problems with the other party's ideas, and backing off if I am not given a fair hearing. With my father I learned early that he wasn't interested in arguing with me. He told me how it was and he might even tell me why, but he was unbending on most things. My mother was more malleable, but she had to be right. My upbringing tended to teach me to keep my opinions to myself for the most part. Being an INTJ, it was pretty easy for me to do just that. I went to my room and kept my opinions to myself. With most others, I have no problem with watching them stumble because of their own choices, but with my wife, while I will let her do it, because I respect her right to make up her own mind, I still hate to see her suffer, even if it was by her own choice. I often wonder why it is so hard to deal with people. It should be simple, but in the end it usually works out like trying to set order into unyielding chaos.

[@zoehiner6069]

I have this problem, and I really thought I was being nice. Everytime I do this I feel that the person is being a Nancy, but I am the problem.

[@INTJIsland]

It is surprising isn't it? Many times I have listened to recordings of myself when I was talking about something to someone else and I am shocked at the way I sound sometimes. I am just expressing an idea and it comes off far harsher than I intended.

[@luvsakura9912]

I can relate. And im a work in progress... so more often than naught, id give a short intro or disclaimer when i talk or converse w/ new acquiantances. It's actually a struggle. It's like keeping my tone of voice in check all the time.. is not like me at all.. u know.. that feeling. It makes me feel like im a robot if i keep myself checking on "my blind spots". So, i decided to keep silent most of the time, avoid engaging on large grp activities or anything that will make me talk or speak more than the usual. But keeping quiet, also is an INTJ blind spot.. esp if our quietness make us do the "death stare". What to do? Ha ha ha..

[@INTJIsland]

It is shocking when I hear my own voice recorded and I am talking like that. I had no idea how I sounded. Being quiet is safer but as you say, it is often misunderstood. What to do? Great question. :-)

[@catorce9027]

I have new students tell me I am "Scary".

[@INTJIsland]

That should keep them in line. :-) I am glad the students who have been there a while realize that you are just a good teacher and the strong tone in your voice is not angry or threatening.

[@catorce9027]

@@INTJIsland Later, they all call me MaMa. Everyone calls me MaMa. The art teacher nicknamed me MaMa Bird, because I know best. I can't tell if it's a compliment or an insult. So socially awkward. 😂😶

[@INTJIsland]

I do socially awkward really well.

[@baaf777]

Strong Te can come across as demanding. We used to nick-name our ESTJ daughter “the little general”.

[@INTJIsland]

Sounds like my granddaughter. There is something quite endearing about a young one who knows what she wants and why. But she can be a handful. She is only 6 but she can think past most objections already. I love an active mind. Little general, I love it.

[@pugninja7037]

My intj bf does this.. I have told him to be softer.. still does it but I know he doesn’t mean it

[@INTJIsland]

Good for you! He probably is like me and doesn't even know he is doing it. Every time I realize I have done this to my wife, and now my granddaughter, I feel horrible. As you say, I don't mean it.

[@pugninja7037]

INTJ Island My ex partner to was a intj .. as well but he has this with our son.. my son takes it very personally and feels he can’t ever please his dad..I say he doesn’t mean it 🤣

[@INTJIsland]

I am pretty sure my father was INTJ and we had a big wall between us. Most of it was his drinking but he had a hard time with his own father and I think it poisoned the well for him with me also. I have tried very hard to avoid that with my own sons. My older one is an ESTP and other than one serious bump in the road when he was in his early twenties things have been pretty smooth. I don't see him often though because he lives in Japan. My younger son is here in the same town. I see him a lot more often. I think he is an ISTP and we get along just fine, but he is much closer with my wife. Their personalities work together very well. My last two videos were both recorded using a microphone he bought for me on my 67th birthday this week. He picked a perfect gift to be sure. :-) He spent more than he should have however. Still, I have always worried that he would feel he wasn't making me proud or pleasing me. He has nothing to worry about on that score, and he never has. I am very proud of him. He is a good son, a good father, and a good partner to his girlfriend. (Two kids and they are finally talking about getting married. :-) ) It is hard sometimes with kids for an INTJ. Some children, like my granddaughter are very sensitive, and it takes extreme care for an INTJ to avoid being a bull in a china shop and knocking those sensitive feelings all around without even trying. Good for you to try and soften the blows. Dad is probably aching inside because his son has those feelings. I can't even begin to describe the pain I had when my ex left me and took our little boy away from me. Are you familiar with this song? kzbin.info/www/bejne/joGXoq2caMhjpdU I had other issues than the first verse describes, but that second verse buries me in emotion, and the chorus nails it perfectly. I have that song in the book I perform from and I have a hard time not breaking up when I sing it. Even now I can feel the pain of that little towheaded boy, just turned two, being snapped away from me. I spent a couple of years when I only saw him briefly because of my Navy duty. That picture in this video was the first time I saw him after 18 months on Midway Island. We were at the San Francisco Zoo and my heart was soaring at finally being with my son again. Having both my boys together was like Heaven to me. Life can really be a mess sometimes.

[@pugninja7037]

Just by your paragraph it says how emotionally deep you are , thank you for the song .. really is heart felt .. I think with INTJs if u look for emotion/feelings via logic u see how truly sensitive you guys are..

[@INTJIsland]

Thank you. I should mention it, that photo with my boys is almost exactly 40 years old. It was taken in 1978. It was the first time the two brothers had seen each other.

[@johtanoyo]

U have great spouse sir!

[@iammisanthrope7764]

I should have been an officer in the military. I most likely was in a past life.