The Madness and Horror of Loneliness | Crazy Ex-Girlfriend

Twitter: / harrisonchute
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Rebecca Bunch is a perfect character in part because there’s two things she does at once -- because she's 'crazy' she facilitates the entertaining part of this comedy show, doing everything over the top and like none of us would actually do even if we secretly want to. She has none of our shame but all of our minute desires. And because she's ‘crazy’ she also facilitates a fascinating character study, of course.

[@sophia6297]

"the world makes love an urgent priority for women, who are then called crazy for behaving urgently." YES. so well-said. it's very frustrating, especially because love is a fundamental human need. no one should be shamed for trying to get it.

[@justthecoolestdudeyo9446]

I also love the phrase "we're both from different planets and neither one is Earth" and will steal it now

[@TheGabygael]

It's been living Rent free in my head for years now

[@thanatos101b]

This episode is a masterpiece. One of the most amazing things it does, is that it strips away every relationship and even potential relationship in Rebecca's life. Paula is not speaking to her, Hector misses the bus, Heather is with Greg, Josh is with Valencia, and White Josh is with Darryl. You never actually feel like that is what's happening, just Rebecca being her normal awkward self... until the POV switches to almost directly Rebecca's own eyes and suddenly you see everyone in her life isolating her. And, outside of Valencia (and Paula who isn't there), it isn't even intentional. None of these people are actively seeking to exclude Rebecca, she's just such an afterthought they don't even bother to consider her. And, even worse, they are on a party bus which means she can't leave. Rebecca is not someone really capable of making a graceful exit, but she physically can't even make a clumsy or dramatic exit. She's trapped on a bus with no means to leave the situation as Paula won't pick her up. The pole dance was obviously a desperate cry for attention... but it is in the context of the fact she is in such a confined space filled with people and yet is completely isolated without any means of leaving. If this was a party she might... I don't know... make out with a guy while trying to grill him for information and then start crying which prompts him to try to take her home. I think you are spot on about your analysis of her relationship with White Josh. I am not sure if the character was always meant to be gay or not... but one key difference is that there is literally no sexual tension between him and Rebecca. And White Josh becomes actually a more confident, more mature, more intelligent and insightful version of Josh as he gets shaded in more. His description of his workout routine isn't inherently interesting (unless you are Darryl and interested in working out as a theoretical concept), however he drops enough tidbits of fascinating personal details that she could have prompted a much more interesting conversation... she just completely failed. But then again she didn't genuinely want to be friends with him, he was just her only option. Which points to Rebecca's consistent problem of really only wanting to talk about herself. It foreshadows her eventual feud with Paula. Lastly, I'd like to say that Rebecca's "re-appropriation" of pole dancing is more or less the purest symbol of herself possible. She creates an elaborate (and pseudo-feminist) justification for using base sexuality to get male attention. I think you could write several books on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend's viewpoint on feminism. And probably at least one on this episode specifically, which contains an anthem about women who hate women insulting each other but disguising those insults as friendly advice. But part of it is Rebecca's willful self-deception. She has an entire rationalization for how using her sexuality to get male attention as part of a scheme to find fulfillment in a man is actually a transgressive feminist activity. And her life on the bus goes from bad to a five car pileup the moment she does it. And it is fixed when she gets approval from a man (Josh) which leaves her, as she would say in a later episode, "quenched." It's deeply symbolic of all her actions in the series where she uses highly intellectual rationalization to justify her own deeply basal and primitive drives.

[@TheCNRProject]

"highly intellectual rationalisation to justify her own deeply basal and primitive drives" Great interpretation and I also find this to be the case. Crazy Ex-girlfriend's dialogue about feminism is highly interesting and I would love for someone to explore it in-depth. Particularly when the hyper-individualism and "non-threatening" flair of mainstream feminism is fairly rampant at the moment and pretty much anything can be claimed as a "feminist act" or "empowerment" to justify certain actions, some that I personally find transgressive to other women, if not themselves. I think "Put Yourself First" is also a great exploration in the issues of sexualisation and self-empowerment, and I think in the social media era it should be discussed more often.

[@omg9261]

Omg, such a great comment! I kiterallu made screenshots because it explained not only the movie, but some of the scenes in my life as well.

[@queenanacaona8531]

oh my god if hector hadn't overslept he probably would have met heather like two years earlier

[@matthewwalker3131]

i definitely agree with this, i find Rebecca's character good because shes socially awkward and slightly nerdy without going down the route of "she never leaves her room, is an introvert, and never tries socially" like so many cheap teen romcoms. I have definitely been the trying too hard person, i feel more rebecca bunch than most characters. also I'm loving the subtlety of "white josh and daryl seem to become close friends"

[@beyondthebluu]

This episode was, and still is, so painful for me to watch. It also probably didn't help that the second time I watched it was with a friend that pointed out I had behaved a lot like Rebecca in regards to trying to fit in with a group of his friends. It's weird because I feel like I should be grateful that I'm not the only one who has felt this way, but it still hurts so much that I would almost prefer to just not think about those feelings and experiences all together rather than confront them, which is probably just as fitting considering that is something major they address in the show.

[@justthecoolestdudeyo9446]

I wonder if the reason Rebecca doesn't have an easy category for Greg is why she felt that he was "adult" in a way she wasn't in the episode where they go on a date and she sleeps with the vegan guy. He doesn't play a certain role for her, he's just another human being like her trying to figure everything out, and her realizing that is part of why she's both drawn to him but can't really commit to him. Idk, what do all of you think?

[@bk138gt6]

Just the Coolest Dude Yo i agree. Greg is damaged, but ever so slightly ahead of where Rebecca is at that point. He's nuanced in ways she isn't quite ready for and didn't expect. He doesn't fit her schema or her preconceptions of what people can actually be like. She's not ready for it, it threatens her self understanding, so she sabotages it. When Rebecca slept with the vegan guy, i was crushed on Greg's behalf. But it hurt Rebecca too

[@murnshaw]

Have you ever considered that maybe the reason the show is so appealing is because it is a power fantasy for introverts and loners? You say it yourself that Becs approaches a problem the way we want to, but don't; It is classic wish-fulfillment. I do like this episode very much, because of the grounded reality and consequence of the premise. We have been told, by romantic comedies time and time again, that winning someone's heart is just one grand-gesture away from success. This episode is saying the most you can hope for with grand gestures is for someone to understand you a little better, and you will make yourself incredibly foolish-looking in the process.. Storylines like this are the show's strongest, imho. Present a premise that we frequently see, show us all of the fallacies involved, and expose the characters as human beings who cannot hope to sustain themselves gracefully under the unreasonable expectations. Give us a reason to root for Becs and crew and people will stay and watch. I miss Greg so much. Santino Fantana sells "Incredulous guy who invites you to laugh with him at himself" so well. He really grounded the show and made a great audience surrogate. There's no character with that role now, except maybe White Josh. He doesn't really get enough screen time to count though.

[@girlwithbowler]

Just a fun fact: Kenny Ortega was also the director of the High School Musical series and Newsies. Two Disney ventures that were especially praised for their choreography. It might not be a coincidence that Rebecca was so good at pole dancing.

[@MsDreamscaper]

People like white Josh are appreciated without trying. They seem to be at ease with themselves He is a cool, masculine gay man who dates older men and appears to be content. That kind of confidence could cause envy in some people. It.can possibly irritate people who have to try harder to be funny and interesting to make friends. (Barb and Nancy - Paula). I love it when parents are brought in for adult characters on shows. It helps to see why a character is who he or she is. Rachel wanted so much to be loved by her father. Movies with unusual families are some of my faves. Captain Fantastic was the most recent that I watched. Your videos are insightful and entertaining.

[@vincentlee8787]

Not much to add to your video, but Rachel's reading of "I love him so much" -- when she finally admits her feelings -- is heartbreaking. I think that single line is one of the best pieces of acting she's done on the show. It's such a vulnerable and palpably earnest moment. It reminds me why we root for Rebecca so hard in spite of her manipulation and dishonesty.

[@BagelsAfterMidnight]

Yeah, that is really good. The whole ending makes me tear up no matter how many times I've seen it

[@MusicMeg2012]

I never thought about rebecca's animosity towards white josh as a parallel to what she /should/ feel about josh - it's just that she's so clouded with nostalgia and feelings and fantasy towards josh, she doesn't realize that without all the concocted magic - would she even like him, as a person? You kind of get a small inkling of that with nathaniel pointing out some of josh's traits to her (traits that white josh shares) and it upsets her a lot, because she kind of knows he's a little right. Again, thanks for providing some great opportunities to think complexly about the show.

[@MusicMeg2012]

Update since season four episodes "I loved you once. Amazing"

[@TheCNRProject]

Compared to being home alone, I find that loneliness to be even worse when you are in a room full of people, not strangers but people I know more or less like in Rebeccca’s situation, I really get that sting of loneliness. So that POV shot in the show really hit me hard and it felt like deja vu. Being confronted with the fact that you feel separate from the world, and you see people who hardly know each other connecting and having fun (how do they do that? It’s like watching a magic show sometimes). This for certain stems from a case of imposter syndrome, I have gotten better in the past couple of years, but in my work and relationships I do have this anxiety that someone is going to find out that I'm a fraud. I can rationalise that I'm a valuable and wanted person, but it is nevertheless shadowed by doubts and fears that maybe one day someone will prove to me and everyone else, that on the contrary I'm not a great person. It is a maddening position to be in, and I can understand Rebecca's desperate actions to feel accepted.

[@goldilocksclyq2994]

I initially watched CEG expecting comedy..... it is actually a tragic dark comedy acted out light heartedly...... thanks for the analysis......

[@zyxwut321]

So, basically she acts crazy because she's lonely and she's lonely because acts crazy? I guess the show posits that the solution out of that mess is to calm down and tell the truth.

[@ashleythomas423]

Please don't ever stop making these. Ever since I discovered the show I've been hungry for analyses like these. THANK YOU SO MUCH.

[@BagelsAfterMidnight]

Thank you!

[@jamesgrandjean6138]

Ashley T Agreed! Keep it up please. :)

[@ALu-nq8rf]

"And next up, Jane the Virgin!"

[@angeliquemariel2916]

HAHA LMAO I LOVE THAT BLOOPER SO MUCH!!!!🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@Noelciaaa]

Would you consider making a video that's like "Why you should watch Crazy Ex-Girlfriend"? I'd been trying to get all my friends into it but my chaotic excited babbling isn't that much convincing. It would be great if I had something like this to show them! ^^. And I'm sure no one but you could do it best.

[@immycowper9352]

Noelciaaa his video 'what is crazy ex girlfriend' is a great intro that captures the show and is v persuasive in my opinion!

[@83croissant]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAWWW? I LOVE HOCUS POCUS

[@LunaVee3435]

83croissant "We ironically rewatch Hocus Pocus"

[@83croissant]

*Nostalgically

[@LunaVee3435]

Ooops, you're right!

[@MisterAlexWill]

"All citizens must watch Hocus Pocus"

[@83croissant]

"Or they will be killed"

[@annadownya7754]

One of the points that really annoys me, particularly in how the party bus situation ended, is Rebecca being caught in a lie. I know this might sound trite, but she's a lawyer, shouldn't she be better at lying? Plus she's smart. Brilliant people are usually good at lying, especially the crazy ones actually. (When u have to hide your emotional and mental health baggage all the time, u get great at deception, u have to.)

[@swaggygirl3516]

Obviously it's harder to lie about your life to people you're trying to build a relationship with and maybe seduce. rather than in a work setting where lying is a norm and you don't have emotionnal connexion to the people you're lying to.

[@BeccatheBizarre]

These videos help me get my CXG fix. I always look forward to your analyses on the show. I'm happy that people are thinking about this show as much as I am.

[@Freckles101598]

Rewatching these because they’re a perfect distraction, I hope you’re doing alright!

[@karlean7]

So first of all, this video is amazing like so many of your other videos. One of my favorite things about Crazy Ex Girlfriend (and other works of art that have similar depth) is that the more you think about it the more rewarding it becomes. Second of all, I don't know if you take suggestions, but one thing I have personally considered doing (in non-video form) is the full story of Rebecca Bunch up till when the show starts. The writers have done a phenomenal job of rooting every aspect of Rebecca's character in her childhood, her experiences growing up, and her relationships to the people around her (chiefly her parents), so much so that as of the end of Season 2 I feel like we have seen enough to paint a detailed picture of who Rebecca Bunch and why. There's so much history implied even in just the relationship between Silas (the Westchester Sperm Machine) and Naomi (of the long-historied Garfinkel clan) and how that might create someone like Rebecca. It's an interesting (and TV-centric) sort of long-form storytelling, showcasing how even just the casual drip-feed of background information (as opposed to the "Great big relevations! episode) can give someone who pays attention enough information to put together a truly complete picture of a person and their motivations.

[@BagelsAfterMidnight]

I think you should totally go for that -- I don't think McKenna and Bloom actually agree on the timeline, so they're probably just waiting for someone to figure it out. In the weeks before Season 3 starts I was gonna do a chronological recap, which I guess would start in 1901-- similar but different I think

[@joryelazouazi3377]

Never knew what my "type" was until now: Sass Master! Thank you, Sir!

[@elisabethcrabtree]

Episode 9 was the one where I became obsessed with this show. Same thing happened for me (3'29") as you. That jaw-dropping moment of seeing your deepest fears and experience of isolation portrayed in media is so powerful. I can't think of another show that has even tried to capture that. It's a masterpiece.

[@jamieriley9410]

You so deserve so many more views. Why did it take me this long to find your channel?

[@amandalovewell7573]

Party Bus of Pain would be such a good name for a emo rock band. lol. Love it!

[@annamaegold]

I cannot even begin to tell you how much I both self-identify with basically everything and find it immensely healing. Thank you for psychoanalysing this.

[@nmnmtrmrmn6970]

Really liked this, it was very thought provoking! I love the way you analyze Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, it's helped me think more deeply and better understand a show I already loved the crap out of to begin with, so thank you! And I laughed so hard at that clip from the gag reel at the end!

[@soccergirl97201]

Another great piece. Enjoyed it immensely.

[@michekay9354]

Really enjoyed your analysis on this episode!

[@zoemcleod5998]

Wow. This hit hard. I knew that loneliness scene got to me, but it didn't realise how much until I heard you explain it. Thank you!

[@lem_moon]

I want 'True Pole' on a t-shirt

[@dollfaceddreadnaught7501]

Love love love this channel! I've been really looking forward to hearing more of your thoughts on season 1 after your awesome analysis/recap of season 2. Was really excited to see this in my subscription box. Keep up the great work! P.S. This is the exact reason this episode gets to me so much. It knows where to hit where it hurts!

[@JayAyers]

This channel is the best lead up to season 3! Thanks for all the hard work on your videos. It makes me love this show even more!

[@capillaryhints]

Just wanted to pop in and let you know your videos are the current highlight of my week. Please keep doing your thing, you really got something special here ♡

[@colinneagle4495]

Thanks for all your hard work and thoughtful analysis! Please keep them coming! I'm also interested to hear your thoughts on other TV shows.

[@ciarakfralek3855]

I will never not be excited to see one of these videos in my sub box. Great job as always! Thanks for creating such interesting, engaging, thought provoking content about the show I love!

[@xuxellbaron6483]

Love your videos! Finally a place to talk about the best show currently on tv. Please keep doing them!

[@rockinhamburger6934]

Another great video analysis. It is so nice to have juicy CEG content; I'm always happy to find one of your vids in my inbox. I totally agree re: those moments of recognition in the show. It can be funny, like when they perfectly render what it feels like when you're have a few people over (that mix of excitement and frenzy), or serious, like when they nail the emotional truth of self-loathing in You Stupid Bitch. But this show so accurately portrays those difficult and often darker parts of the human experience that don't usually get illustrated on television. Sometimes it's so eerily close to the truth that it feels like someone read my diary, and it's just one of the reasons the show's so top notch. You really beautifully crystallized that representational experience here. Thanks for sharing.

[@jamesgrandjean6138]

I live for your analytical skills. Thanks for these vids!!

[@BagelsAfterMidnight]

haha thanks, man

[@user-fo8rr7re7p]

Omg I understood the show but this guy's explanation is spot on and it actually gave me more insight on why she is the way she is

[@emmafolkenroth9911]

I want to thank you for your beautiful channel. I love your analysis and understand of the show. Since I discovered your channel I have to watch a video every time before I write a paper to get in the mindset and style you so eloquently exemplify. Thank you for existence and amazing videos.

[@BagelsAfterMidnight]

Wow that's high praise! Thank you!

[@qmechanic]

Wow, out of all the episodes you chose to analyze, you picked this one. This is my absolute favorite episode so far, out of the entire show. Heavy drama is my wheelhouse, and this episode has it in spades. Like you, Rebecca's loneliness deeply resonated with me. Both of Rebecca's scenes with Josh (West Covina, 2nd reprise) and Paula at the end of the episode are so heartfelt and moving. I felt like I gained so much insight into Rebecca's character. More importantly, it made me fall in love with Rebecca as a character. 109 is the episode that made me obsessed with the show. You made an interesting speculative observation about White Josh, I'll have to think about it on a rewatch. I cracked up when you mentioned "Brechtian distance". I'll have to look up what it means, but it made me feel like I was in a class. It's good to learn new things, since I never majored in film or media. I loved how you threw in the scene from the gag reel at the end. Keep up the great work!

[@BagelsAfterMidnight]

The usage of "Brechtian distance" is just one of those things. I hear about this guy Bertolt Brecht who theorized about emotional responses given analytical distance to the stage, and he wrote a book, "On Theatre," which I bought just so I could reference it and sound smart. It sits on the shelf at my parents' house, unread

[@nanajiloh]

You make it hard for me to write an essay about this show... I mean, you basically covered all the basis, dude. Congrats!

[@aeh5109]

I suffer from severe imposter’s syndrome and I’m a 27 yo lawyer with a masters degree… but I always have nightmares that one day my university is gonna call me and take it all away because my thesis was actually a lie or something

[@Katiewithdaffodils]

I really love this analysis, please do lots more videos! :)

[@BagelsAfterMidnight]

Thanks for watching!

[@deadindividual4847]

Gotta stay Realsies.

[@evildoesnotsleep-x2b]

i'm watching your crazy ex girlfriend videos and thanking you every second for making them

[@mikeduplessis6315]

Its interesting that this and the Textmergency episode are the two episodes CxGF fans are most likely to show friends in an effort to get them to watch. And they seem to be the two episodes that 'casual viewers' most recoil from. Casual TV viewers don't want to go on a 'deep dive' into their own psyche. They don't want personal insights. That's why NCIS is the most popular show on TV. A lack of substance is seen as a *desirable* attribute!

[@BagelsAfterMidnight]

I have to watch a significant amount of NCIS for my job, and they are SOOOOOOOO bad

[@EllieBobbit]

LOVE IT You should podcast season 3

[@ms.rstake_1211]

I love your take on the imposter syndrome in (high-achieving) women-at-work. 👏

[@rebeccajade4749]

Absolutely love this channel, I've been looking for a place to watch Crazy Ex Girlfriend analysis! Do you know any other channels that do something similar?

[@BagelsAfterMidnight]

Hmm, the only thing I can really come up with is a CXG podcast I'm particularly fond of: Crazy Ex-GirlFans: cxgfans.libsyn.com/

[@rebeccajade4749]

Thank you! I'll have to listen to that too. I love your videos, can't wait to see what's coming!

[@83croissant]

Bagels After Midnight I hope you will be a guest on Crazy Ex-Boyfriends !!

[@shannonkahermanes6080]

Love this episode! Good point about Rebecca and White Josh although in a later episode when she meets Greg on that bridge, she mentions him more favorably... that kind of highlights how she really feels about him vs. how she acts around him. Interesting.

[@clairey165]

me too, to all of this. i've been here too

[@dancingcpa1]

Bring this show back

[@levinelson5840]

Why am I crying?

[@dennisstampley264]

OH I LOVE REBECCA CLOTHES IN THAT SHOW SHE LOOCS PRETTY I LOVE THEM SANDALS MY HEART IS TOUCHED ABOUT HER

[@susanruda]

BAGELS AFTER MIDNIGHT, who are you? Your analyses are so deep and insightful and well told. What is your relationship to the show "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend"?

[@BagelsAfterMidnight]

Thanks! Very big fan.

[@MiracleWinchester]

@03:29: OH GOD

[@83croissant]

ah I was s'posed to go to bed oh well

[@ckliffames1]

WHERE DID YOU GET THE SCRIPT!!??

[@ElleBeeps]

Hi I'm doing a research task for school about the representation of women with mental health on the media, do you know of any good books or articles related to it?

[@BagelsAfterMidnight]

I didn't have anything off-hand but this one looks interesting, about "Objectification Theory" from Psychology of Women Quarterly: journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1111/j.1471-6402.1997.tb00108.x And for general feminism criticism, my go-to guide is here: feministfrequency.com/resources/recommended-media/non-fiction/ (I found The Gender Knot to be particularly eye-opening, but not specifically related to mental health)

[@ElleBeeps]

That's fab, thanks for your help!

[@wangray9456]

Well, maybe you are too smart for others? LOL