The Perfect Dull Treat? - Khora: Rise of an Empire Review

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Video Editing by Louie Pollard

[@the_Zinabi]

As a person who chooses to represent themselves as a beige cube, I have a lot of appreciation for Matt's take on the magic of slightly wonky looking brown spreadsheet games.

[@kailomonkey]

I want to see the sexy spreadsheet clipart. They censored it from the video and just showed placeholder text!

[@TheRealCodeBlack]

This is a really interesting argument Matt is making here that being dry thematically is, ironically, an essential part of what makes euro games fun, and that seeming to be too vibrant and exciting can cause them to look like something they're not. I had never thought about the genre in that way before.

[@sventheultimate]

I do think though that this game looks amazing and exciting - maybe vibrant even. I remember before SPIEL21 I was very hyped for this, up until I saw a playthrough video and realized it is not what I thought it would be, and that every game would play basically the same.

[@GerackSerack]

I had never thought about it, but it feels right! Good euro-games are so comfy...

[@CharlesCom-bd2qb]

For sure, think about any german game of Feld game, the ugly graphical style is part the charm.

[@revimfadli4666]

​@@CharlesCom-bd2qb and that's not even taking into account ugly games with _great_ visual clarity, in contrast with pretty yet illegible games

[@meathir4921]

Matt repeatedly getting catfished by spreadsheets needs to be the new running joke.

[@LordJazzly]

At least it's not as embarrassing as being spreadsheeted by a catfish.

[@luigiscazzari4724]

His reviews always deliver. Plus, we need more pictures from the teenage years from the people at SUSD in the reviews. :D

[@titanuranus3095]

Mattfished!

[@Sputnik34]

as you explained the rules of the game i said to myself: "this looks boring as hell and i want it in my life right now."

[@claytonparker7323]

LOL

[@stumbling]

The benefit of playing as Argos is that you can store all your goods in one big warehouse and order them up as required from a laminated catalogue. (Non-UK people will not get that joke but all UK people were expecting it.)

[@peterclarke7240]

The Laminated Book of Dreams.... Do all your purchases break within an hour of you getting them home?

[@rocketfallen]

I've reached a point in my life where instead of trying to justify why the things I enjoy are actually exciting, I've just embraced that I just love boring things. Fuck yeah boring things.

[@klapaucius7339]

You just live on a higher plane of perception. To quote Metallica: "Boredom slips into the boring mind."

[@guysjackson2570]

"Improvement of the Polis" isn't a boardgame title, its the Scottish counterargument to "Defund the Cops"

[@ob1quixote]

The way Matt sold, "KHORA blimey!" made me have to pause the video and take off my glasses I laughed so hard.

[@nekkowe]

6:20 "We're doing cows? This is the best day of my life!" - Matt Lees (out of context), 2022

[@MrTombombodil]

Matt! Your hair is distressingly reasonable these days. Bring back the isolation Matt-dew!

[@thechevyferrari9559]

IKR? Surfer Matt was my favorite hairdo.

[@bantte2003]

Matt, from the bottom of my heart, I truly want you to share more recipes with us like you used to from The Opener. I want to cook what you cook. I want to eat what you eat. I want to dream what you dream.

[@ElkiLG]

It's interesting how they made the lovely artwork not too exciting. They look mostly like people posing for a painting, a very nice painting. I wonder how much that was on purpose.

[@MichaliSarris]

That was some outstanding tapping of the box. Really enjoyed it.

[@dold_]

Perfectly dull is a good way to put it. Khora is fun and fast but not in the usual ways board games are. My friend and I also found it fun to add extra rounds to the game to run up the tracks further, super easy with the event card system - not balanced but fun.

[@JD-qq8fz]

5:58 Hahah I just had to say TEMPESTAS IMPERVIUS out loud Like the most optimum seafaring monk

[@claytonparker7323]

You guys are fucking awesome game reviewers. Please don't ever stop doing it.

[@AlexRechevskiy]

Matt is hilarious!!! I often rewind to rewatch the gags multiple times. Very funny. Thank you! 🙏

[@frixyg2050]

After all, he's an "excerpt"! Says so right there.

[@AlexRechevskiy]

@@frixyg2050 don’t make me tap the sign…

[@SamKimish]

The editing on this is sublime.

[@somestrangeflea]

woop woop, that’s improvement of the polis.

[@niland1848]

Excerpt tattoo for everyone. Simply amazing… well done!!!!

[@jonathoncampbell6813]

13:49 You don't know how I feel about dice? I subscribe to a board game review channel! I LOVE DICE. I came for the dice... That and your lovely faces and insightful critiques. Stay Fabulous, everyone.

[@ralelunar]

I'm so conflicted about how Conquest works. On one hand, I love the dullness of just checking to see if I have the required numbers on the track, that fits with the rest of the game. On the other hand, the American gamer in me would've loved if the Conquest half of the board was an actual map of the Mediterranean region and surrounding areas, where I can "march" a disc from space to space.

[@ConManAU]

What if the track was printed on a map of the Mediterranean, but otherwise worked exactly the same?

[@ralelunar]

@@ConManAU I'd take that, too

[@bird9230]

Dull treat? My favorite type of treat!

[@Itharius33]

Really great job on the background music on this one 👍🏻

[@citriccomics]

Missed this when it first went up, but I really appreciate Matt's reviews of games that aren't necessarily "SUSD reccomends" but can still great if the design appeals to you.

[@doggosplosion]

It is called Head Quarter Simulation game club, as that is how Japanese game designers/publishers will credit a group of people instead of a single person. They also call board games "analog games" and their UKGE equivalent is "Game Market". Head Quarter Simulation game club made the first iteration of the game "Improvment of the Polis" as you stated.

[@NoeHernandezPe767]

In this series of Mediterranean cardboard madness I’d love to see a review of GMT’s “Ancient Civilizations of the Inner Sea”

[@maxway6953]

Costuming department was on point, with the subtle match of Matt's shirt to his blinds. A+, 10/10, the content I subscribe for! ;) (On a serious note: thank you for this pleasant and not-dull review of an apparently pleasant and kind-of dull game)

[@SenorTallon]

"Choices, choices everywhere and gosh it's nice to think," is something that I will be repeating years from now.

[@PeterHaderlein]

Really great scripting and delivery on this one, 10/10

[@georgewsinnott]

Khora is a great game. Really pleased Matt showed some love for those of us who appreciate a tactical, well presented spreadsheet game!

[@ski3091]

The Monty Python of board game reviewers

[@SilentFlatulence]

When I clicked on this video, I clearly didn't get a good look at the thumbnail, because I thought the man holding the vase was Quinns 😂

[@sillypookmonster]

I got this in the Zatu New Release Box last year and we really enjoyed it. Looking forward to getting it back to the table with a full player count.

[@IronSalamander8]

Gotta say, this sounds extremely dull, but I appreciate you guys and all you do! Love this channel, even when we have very different takes on games.

[@NormalTheBand]

Roll for the Galaxy > Race for the Galaxy Come At Me!

[@NormalTheBand]

I kid, they are both excellent. and this was a great review of a game I'd love to play but have no interest in owning personally

[@pheonixr1337]

Agreed, but... New Frontiers > Roll for the Galaxy > Race for the Galaxy

[@noahplatt3705]

You mistaking the names of Greek cities as characters is hilarious.

[@Johannes_W]

I think I am exactly the target group for this one - need to get it to the table finally. And I do love Concordia and Race ftG (not roll though).

[@AzraelCC]

07:49 That's one big loaf of bread.

[@Squatch_needs_no_heroes]

Hot pink and purple sci-fi euros? Shots fired at Voidfall.

[@denycast]

Matt is the only person on the planet that can make me exited about a dry euro game😀

[@sabine_pic2026]

"Heaven and Ale (...) feels like you're being held hostage by crayons." 😂😂 I'll never be able to look at that game without laughing.

[@sloopdoopyh1493]

Sounds really fun but there’s no way I could convince my friends to give it a try 😂 great review!

[@browe]

Not a game for me but, damn, this vid features one of *the best* quotable observations in a SU&SD review: "...or is it he’s out getting absolutely *twisted* with the lads and just stopped in to buy some crockery?!" 🙃🥰 Righteous, that. [edit] Had to add that--don't ask me to explain--this felt like some of the tightest, svelte, inventive writing on the channel for some time. That's a good thing; don't make me tap the box.

[@DeyaViews]

3:50 trick question, every spreadsheet is sexy

[@crookedevolution]

I'm with Matt - someone get me a copy of Improvement of the Polis, stat!

[@jusatin]

I very often agree with SU&SD reviews, but this one I disagree with. I’ve had a lot of fun with Khora. It’s simple enough to get the handle of it very fast, but it has enough complexity to keep you coming back. (Granted I do enjoy spreadsheets, as after all I play Football Manager also lol)

[@Ditocoaf]

I feel like Matt should have more-explicitly stated "me calling this boring isn't meant as an insult", since yeah to most people "boring" implies "I had a bad time". I'm pretty sure the point is meant to be that "boring can be pleasant", but he just kind of acts as if that's common knowledge and takes the review from there.

[@danhenry9108]

Beige Traders III: Now in Colors!

[@THESP-rz3hg]

Finally- Matt reveals his bona-fides. We can all stop wondering if he is an "excerpt"

[@thatguyyouknowtheone4073]

What the hell does this garish sentence mean? Is this a new dialect?

[@alexandervandeneijnden7207]

Appreciate the The Wire reference, Matt!

[@AndiVx]

I got excited for a Matt+Quinns review after seeing the thumbnail for a split second. I definitely do not see any resemblance, but it was a weird double take...

[@tehdiplomat]

It sounds like Matt needs a Recommends Pear in a hexagon, with the word EXPERT underneath it

[@squidy7771]

You had me at "3D slotty bits" ngl

[@vanyaserra1]

Everyone I have introduced this game to has really enjoying. It is thinky without being to heavy. Enough of a civ builder without feeling like a civ builder. I will play it with people no problem.

[@StriderZessei]

Matt: "Prophecy of Kings adds too much to keep track of in TI4." Also Matt:

[@Rehtse-hh2yx]

I absolutely love this game! Played a few solo games (played against myself with 2 boards) and really enjoyed them as much as playing with others!

[@TimGaastra]

Khora was, after I played it, just kind of a shock to the system, because absolutely nothing about it HAD been a shock for the past hour or so, but I'd had a good time the entire time I'd played it. It helps that it is probably one of the better timed games out there. Does not outstay its engagement at all.

[@TheRatedOniChannel]

It says something about me as a board gamer that I... would actually love to play Tempestas Impervius, sounds like the board game version of Powerwash Simulator, not the same genre, but that kind of boring, dull simulator that you can spend hundreds of hours just having fun doing boring every day things.

[@giuseppesavaglio8136]

7:30-8:15 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@lemiless]

Matt is an Excerpt! He must be trusted.

[@crookedevolution]

Hold up, Concordia is fiddly compared to Khora? How is that possible, with all of those tracks and tokens, etc? Concordia is one of the most streamlined euros around.

[@pokefrosch617]

Best su&sd review in months! Good job!

[@onewholeegg]

As someone who loves euro trucking and all the so-called mundane types of play, this really speaks to me.

[@SamClemensRIGL]

Matt makes joke about absurdly boring task being a board game; board game one ups the joke by existing. Love it. #BoardGamesInnit

[@campo4108]

"Ancient Greeks exploring Ancient Greece" in reference to conquering Persepolis, that isn't Greece got me seething hahaha

[@cinkin]

Best sponsor reveal ever

[@drasher25]

The art in Heaven and Ale is fantastic!

[@klapaucius7339]

Count me in on the boring crowd then. If I see a big box full of miniatures get brought out, my first inclination is to run. Bring on the beige!

[@KevinRiggle]

"I've been catfished by a spreadsheet... again."

[@JKT84]

I think we need a better visual representation of a "sexy spreadsheet". There's a lot of untapped potential there.

[@maxpokhiton8242]

Damn these reviews are good...

[@RuNacken]

I played this. No classic, but fun. But my main gripe is the training-wheels: the baked in upgrades for each faction makes your strategy sort of predetermined. Sure, you can try to be more taxes-less-war type of Spartans, but you'll be working against yourself the entire game.

[@hudeduge9240]

One person's training wheel is another's main interest in the game. Trying to eek out peak efficiency with each Polis/character is akin to trying to learn and perfect the move set to Chun Li or Blanka...

[@richardsaunders9214]

Luckily, we don’t see Matthew Lee’s bowl of soup at the table

[@BobLee-df4zh]

This is a perfect example of why I love euros. I'd much rather have straight gameplay than some generic fantasy theme that I would just ignore anyway.

[@quinthalus]

Don't make me tap the sign.

[@MattTheSpratt]

Tom can teleport.

[@StefanLopuszanski]

I completely agree with this review, but the way it was presented felt weird. Like almost done in reverse? I would think you mention the dice and cards first and then talk about how dull it is. Simply put it is too tight and inflexible. Felt like a spreadsheet indeed. Too much on optimization and just weighing the possibilities based on your dice. Not much in terms of very interesting decisions.

[@virgiledante1901]

Just so you know, Olympia, Argos and Corinth aren't character names, but polis (cities) names x)

[@estokien]

If you don't think that was an intentional misunderstanding you have probably not watched enough SU&SD reviews yet.

[@Rukhage]

I own the game, having played it in Essen last year, and honestly it's a great Euro to introduce Euro to non-Euro people, since it plays fast and it isn't too harsh. That said, some of the event cards could use some spiffing up to make the game more interesting. But other than that I've had fun with it.

[@Groovebot3k]

As someone who is squarely on the "Ameritrash" side of the hobby, I can definitely say that I would not be able to get into a game like this... but I acknowledge others can, and good for them.

[@hudeduge9240]

Why not? From a Euro fan's perspective I/we would regard this as pretty "ameritrashy" and very playable.

[@Groovebot3k]

​​@@hudeduge9240 Great googly moogly that really says something about Eurogamers I guess, because I think the only game in my collection that's remotely this spreadsheet-ey is Dice Forge. And I say "remotely" knowing full well that the only way in which these two games are alike is in how they care about tracks and numbers and also involve dice rolling in some capacity.

[@NylePudding]

He definitely just got twisted with the lads and popped in for some crockery. Great observation that boring themes have their own scrumptious appeal. Gimmie some lovely wooden sheep please. x

[@NoPunIncluded]

A Matt tattoo. A mattoo?

[@scootletawny3886]

What a smashing good time!

[@chriscarton4728]

So much style, what the heck are you ?!

[@FinubJames]

Could you guys do a review of Oathsworn: Into the deepwood please?

[@jemwilli]

I refuse to play again having rolled three sets of snake eyes in one game two were back to back and only rolling 6 or higher once. The ability to mitigate multiple bad rolls while remaining competitive is not a thing. Might be the most frustrating gaming experience I've ever had.

[@sventheultimate]

I think if you put dice in a euro, every value should be useful - like in Castles of Burgundy for example. So if rolling 6s is always better than rolling 1s, then they should reconsider the dice mechanic.

[@Thesussysuscat]

I love beyond the sun, hong kong blackout, and khora . Not the biggest fan of Great Western Trial

[@KMReviews]

I love this game and everyone I play with likes it too. But I also agree it’s the perfect boring game lol. I think it’s good because it doesn’t overstay it’s welcome. It’s a good puzzle. When he said it’s the second round and you ask how to get more coins and the answer is you lost the game, I cracked up lol

[@nightbirdgames]

I actually really like the roll dice and assign them to an action card thingy tile mechanic. Already thought of a way to use that for an upcoming game of mine, just tweaked a little.

[@youtubeaccount2302]

Proper chuckles

[@Keasarr]

I get so torn. I love some dull economical but pretty games, but I also at this point have enough.... Tough choices.

[@David.Marquez]

This is the most eurogame to have ever eurogamed and I love everything about it.

[@calebhargus]

Your videos have been lacking more references to The Wire, glad to see this one correct that.

[@adamfox3483]

So, what's the crochet hook thing you're pointing at stuff with now?

[@AdamWhitehead111]

I'd tap that spreadsheet, not sure it's a keeper though.

[@Sebastian-rt9qf]

Glorious... 'excerpt' LOL

[@rabidpickle]

I enjoyed the game but the dice rolling for selecting actions seemed unnecessarily random

[@adamjd7645]

Ancient Greek Wingspan? 🤷‍♂️

[@tomorrow3582]

Matt have you ever had a minor part in a training video for a big British company?

[@ZoidbergForPresident]

My second, and last, game of this I had to burn all my citizens... and that didn't even help much...