THE PRIMARCHS [1] : TRUST FUND GENERALS | Beginner to Expert Podcast

[@SamueL-td7fb]

Are you guys going to do a quick run through all the Primarch stories in one go or you'll focus in a few of them per video?

[@lorecrimes]

We'll be covering the first 10 this episode then the next. Then at some point we'll go int depth on each Primarch individually =]

[@Channel-23s]

@@lorecrimes great cant wait to see the vid soon and how much info will be shown 👍👍👌👌

[@IMASAURUS1996]

Ave dominus nox!

[@jamesguillette3878]

Hears senguinius' back story about how the red planet baal mutated him to give him wings, "oh no, Red Baal gives you wings"

[@shadowrobot7708]

His BACK story. I get that totally intentional pun.

[@Nobody-zl3kk]

The wings are stored in the Baals you say? (I'm sorry)

[@AhzekBile]

At least it isn't Blue Baal gives you wings

[@Scowleasy]

#SaveEmp find his cell phone and show that is says “8 missed calls -Mom”. The pure terror should get him sprinting off of the throne

[@TheCrimsonSpork]

“Shoutout to Chapter Master Valrak, I definitely didn’t think much of Perturabo before but, the more your read about him, the more you learn about him, he’s actually probably like… on paper the best Primarch”

[@rakshithanand8262]

Perturabo enjoyers rise up!

[@james87367]

He's always been my favourite primark.

[@EVER_PRINCE]

#saveemp tell the Emperor that Erda will no longer be getting Child Support Payments given the fact he’s been on the throne for 10,000, which is long enough to be declared legally dead

[@steffanyschwartz7801]

#SaveEmp During the upcoming young Drukhari revolt Ynead and some of the Drukhari decide that they need the Emperor back. So they go to the Custodes to fix the “life support” by pulling the plug. Terra blows up, terminus decree activates, 100 years later the Emperor is rekindled. Remakes Terra with god powers.

[@big_tymerro]

I sure hope that after the primarchs we can get some videos on the Elector Counts and their provinces . You can’t summon them if you don’t know their names! Maybe I just really want Colin to talk about Fantasy again, haha.

[@Nomadith]

Agreed, it'd be great fun - and maybe throwing in some of the empire's big names that aren't counts, like Kurt Helborg and Luthor Huss

[@diekrahe.]

As long as it's not that meme video again

[@harrybarden6053]

#SaveTheEmps, tell Pertarabo that Dawn just wasn't smart enough to build a device that could heal the emperor and that everyone would be so excited if he could build one

[@colefriel3171]

True

[@ishmeilmathis2218]

He would just break right after showing it off cause petty....

[@dramsac17]

This device can heal our father. (Crushes in fist) lmao

[@paulb7943]

This could work

[@cmdrblaster]

Simple. The Emp just gathers all the psychic energy and shards to himself and proclaim, "IT'S EMPERORIN' TIME!" #SaveEmps

[@petra4385]

I'd convince Tzeentch to do it in the most elaborate and weird way imaginable #saveemp

[@scpwatcher8289]

What a polite follower of khorne he can have toddler or two

[@thewerdna]

You could describe Ferrus as being very headstrong. Because he often gets ahead of himself. Not a great head on his shoulders, some might say.

[@kelakogreenaddict1888]

So no head?

[@TyphoonMinecraft]

18:30 this little discussion is really funny in hindsight with the Lion being back

[@EddyOfTheMaelstrom]

You really need to advertise this podcast harder. How am I just now finding out that all my favorite 40k channels have a podcast together?

[@TheMythMac]

“Which one is awake?” Aged like milk

[@Balrog4242]

Resurrecting Big E is simple: gather the ecclesiarchy around and have them worship him really hard as a god, while simultaneously feeding him 100x as many psykers at once. Then all you gotta do is start sacrificing people, draw the proper Chaos symbols around him in their blood... et voila! Terra is consumed by the newest ruinous power: He Who Golds.

[@myself2noone]

"Sons of the Emperor.." Guilliman: "That's debatable."

[@luigisuper4143]

#SaveEmp Give him a warhammer. Then he wil say: "I am the Warhammer", and start warhammering all over the galaxy.

[@ianamberger9879]

The emperor could be saved by Trazyn stealing his throne and selling off his bag of bones to Fabius Bile, who then makes a clone of Big E out of spite #saveemp

[@aguspuig6615]

Finally, the Rogal Dorn as Ron Swanson reference we all needed

[@Hatchmatter]

Sanginius: Very well written primarch.despite being super overpowered for the most part, he has insecurities, flaws, human moments. Great character arc and conclusion. The scene when he meets his legion is the coolest by far in my opinion. And of course when he dabs on chaos at the eternity gate.

[@aarovit4257]

I would simply hit the Griddy so hard that Big E would have to simply resurrect because of the sheer holy nature of said Griddy #SaveEmp

[@Nomadith]

"Which of them is awake?" Oh, funny you say that Colin...

[@crimsonglory7494]

Some jumper cables, nipple clamps, and a 12v car battery should do the trick #SaveEmp

[@pentacosttb2565]

Sanguinius's wings are likely there on purpose, since 'The Angel', the prototype 'Primarch Zero', that the Emperor created before the Primarch project, had them.

[@serjobsalot8768]

That was super cool! I didn't learn anything new this time around but it was still nicely composed and really fun to listen to. Can't wait for the second part!

[@Channel-23s]

From what I remember The Khan and Fulgrim were switched planets by either Tzeetch or Serograth

[@Azzie420]

My superpower? Oh I’m a master of oopsie moments... for you that is.-Alpharius

[@james87367]

I loved this! Thank you.

[@tra779]

I think they try and explain in one of the books that Russ sometimes has so much blood in his hair that it looks ginger. That explanation has always made me chuckle. I can't find it now but I vaguely remember that Leman was based on a bouncer in Nottingham? I'm guessing the acutal bouncer wasn't a 10ft tall space viking

[@DetectiveLance]

Start getting Big E on an IV line with Wolverine's blood, he's probably still running around in 40k, or strait up splice some of those mutant genes in there, or Deadpool's. Get that regen cycle a kickstart. #SaveEmp

[@superbeanz6947]

I would SUMMON THE ELECTOR COUNTS #SaveEmp

[@ethanm2926]

Of the first 10, I would say perturabo is my favorite. I like the unyielding pragmatism behind the iron warriors and their aesthetic as siege masters. In addition, while all the primarchs have tragedy to them, I like perturabo as a sort of I don't want to be a weapon I just want to build and create. Yet at every turn he is forced to create his war engines and destroy. I also like his pettiness, like he does it, he hates it, he lets you know he hates it, but does it anyway and does it better than almost any of the others. He's extremely flawed. Similar reasons why Mortarion is my favorite of the 20 (technically 19)

[@consolescrub4031]

His sister cuts him down by pointing out his massive martyr complex which I found interesting as one of the most direct confrontations of a primarch's faults (honourable mentions to Gulliman calling out Morty as the one who would never give in and expressing his disappointment at his fall along with Sevetar backtalking Konrad by asking if he ever actually tried any other approach before complaining he was made to be a monster). I like the Iron Warriors grim pragmatism although I feel it worth noting that half their motivation is petty spite. It's probably most telling during the fight against the Hrud where Perturabo is sending his sons in to exterminate them completely, even if it leads to far more casualties than a moderate approach one of his commanders suggested, just so he can hold up his losses and hope people notice his sacrifice and respect him for that (he's too proud to bring it up himself to get respect and it just builds resentment). Perhaps my bias for Dantioch is affecting my judgement but I think the best part about him is how he is adaptable when he needs to be while being uncompromising when he really should be. His advantage over Dorn is that his pessimistic nature means that he never places all his hopes in a single unbreakable line of defence and just wears the enemy down over 50 smaller defensive lines often for a goal he is willing to discard. However the guy has probably flat out refused daemonic influence in the heresy more than most of the loyalists which I have to respect. He still chose to be a traitor but he tried to limit the effect of daemons on his fights which is just fundamentally such good sense I have to respect it.

[@Twinsidedsoldier]

Ask the horses and that one ELF in the lake in [REDACTED] to ressurect the emps with all that gamer girl water. #saveemp

[@guywholikesmemes4993]

For those who don't know, primarchs are 20 minor abstract concepts that the emperor (who given he's called the anathema by abstractions on the spectrum of chaos is most likely order as a concept) made deals with and gave OP as fuck physical avatars to go with their psychic ones which already existed but were more minor parts of reality. The evidence for this is: the riders that make up sanguinius going to the sanguinor and mephiston respectively, horus clone not being as strong as the original because it lacked his souls power (pretty big hint) and the fact that sanguinius also has the black rage he gave his marines work in a way strikingly similar to actual real life platonic conceptual science with ideas as a whole, more specifically the whole:"you start to become more closer to it you become the abstract in a sense" thing. Infact, it gets deeper: in the novel talons of horus, it is stated horus has his psychic avatar....not actually dead like you'd think. It's actually split into 4 pieces, one for each chaos god and he did this during the heresy before it ended while in the warp which for an outsider was a few seconds, but took what felt like centuries for him. We even see the part of him with khorne fighting a fucking tyranid which supports the notion that they function like abstracts at least because how the hell is he fighting one when this is the horus heresy time period? TLDR: Order, m8, please actually tell your kids someday they are not just your kids and something far more important than that. Hell, corvus had to figure it out himself the hard way for crying out loud.

[@superbeanz6947]

Wow

[@jonathanathor117]

so the primarchs are like the ctan but fleshy vessels instead of metal.

[@guywholikesmemes4993]

@@jonathanathor117 the funny thing is that all abstract avatars are like the c'tan because that's how it scientifically works, it's just the avatar is made of whatever the fuck the concept finds best to use to get itself spread: be it a man, some hunk of hyper advanced metal, a fucking form of energy or some other shit.

[@jonathanathor117]

I remembered there was this theory that sanguinous had warp entities as his soul and when he died one of them inhabits the sanguinor and the other inhabits inside mephiston.

[@guywholikesmemes4993]

@@jonathanathor117 yes. Essentially: Once the heresy was done, the twin sides of the abstract wanted to get tf back into physical reality to help daddy E out, so what happened is that the sides of the concept split up (abstract concepts don't give a fuck) and each called dibs on a mf to use as a less powerful but still useful avatar. It should also be noted the abstracts are beyond everything (including existance and non existance funnily enough) and so time isn't a thing for them, this is why it took the dark side of sanguinius so fucking long after he died to go to who he wanted to timeline wise, because the real him doesn't *think* time because it's beyond time. In otherwords: the marines chosen are chosen because they are ALL destined for important shit that is crucial for the imperium's survival.

[@Kyser666]

These series are amazing! I know you guys will build long lasting friendships

[@YellowHornet42]

Really great stuff guys! Love y'all are diving into the Primarchs! Each of you have done stuff on them that I've seen, but it's great hearing y'all talk about it together. Great work as always!

[@philvegas2847]

How to save Big E? Easy, be a good dad right in front of him, he'll be down from that throne real quick #saveemp

[@Duhad8]

Reviving the Emperor is easy as can be, honestly shocked no one has bothered trying it yet. You just go up to the golden throne and loudly say, "Well, since the Emperor is out of it and can't give us his holy feedback, we shall just have to go ahead on our own best judgement. ALRIGHT BOYS FIRE UP THE GENE VATS! Cheese Cake Female Astartes first and then we can start working on the new Space Wolves replacement chapter, the Space Catboys! And tell Mars we are going to need those ceramite chest straps and thongs ready by this time next year!"

[@richardsaunders-irving9885]

The always sunny sound bites 🤌

[@Channel-23s]

Perty is a mean but a successful Primarch he gets results indeed

[@Nervete]

1:25:30 "He is the best at being the goodest" is basically what I heard, lol.

[@stredent]

Space wolves, insert every random dog phrase into lore.

[@jonathanathor117]

51:00 Pertuarbo is basically forge from the X men but with strength of hercules in a war machine hulkbuster hybrid pattern iron man armor.

[@JoshuaKevinPerry]

I need a deep dive on these Primarchs

[@nomadmalachi]

Was listening to this on Spotify and it occurred to me that it would be cool if you guys had a sit down with Dr. Chris Raynor, the Ortho Surgeon that did reaction videos to the Space Marine enhancements, for the podcast.

[@amandag.6186]

I gotta admit. Since reading the first 3 Horus Heresy, I can confirm Horus got rizz. He planted the idea to buy his Ascended model for a while

[@septymesk7721]

The only thing I can think of that counters the whole "primarchs = Warp entities " theory, is that someone...may have been Bile... created a primarch clone of Fulgrim; the clone not only looked and acted like Fulgrim before his fall, but he also had the aura and weird emotional effect on others... not sure how he pulled it off, though

[@MaticustheRed]

I thought about this too.

[@Mixu.]

55:03 *Don't say it don't say it don-* Step-tribe, what are you doing?

[@JoePippin.]

That Jaghati Intro 🤣🤣🤣

[@luckybrass8457]

Brass: #SaveEmp Huck a krak grenade so it sticks to Emp's skull and gets his respawn timer started. Then bang a Sister of Silence. Lucky: Stab him in chest, cast Revivify, then slap him awake and tell him to get the hell up off his ass. #SaveEmp

[@grimb8kn748]

Bring Big E Back: Have the imperium find one of the machines that made the Necrons and then put his corpse through it.

[@MrGasman4]

Baal just is a cloud of Terragin Mist 😂

[@Error-mn4el]

#SaveEmp I would use moisturiser, have you seen his skin? no wonder the Emperor cant get up, imagine the faithful seeing their god with such poor skin condition, until it is fixed he cannot leave the golden throne.

[@aguspuig6615]

NOO, we didnt get to hear Hals fav primarch and the reason why

[@General_Dave_1]

#SaveEmps I would give him a Monster Energy Drink.

[@Channel-23s]

I just thought about it but The Lion is kinda like Rogal Dorn well personality wise I guess

[@mitchellwhitfield4877]

I love all of your channels individually but there is something special about this format. On the lore side of things I really feel it was a missed opportunity with Jaghatai and Leman (objectively the 2 best primarchs), and their respective legions, not having more shared stories… Though the lion doesn’t share his toys and in my head cannon Leman is his bff and good time wrastling buddy.

[@robertopompa_]

#SaveEmp Give em Amnesia So he Forgets hes on the Golden Throne

[@jeremysanders5104]

#SaveEmp show him my collection of Tau body pillows. What better way to get the emperor's bone up?.... because he's mostly bone... I'll see myself out

[@lucast.1259]

#SaveEmp Bring the thickest Callidus Assasins of the Imperium to the Golden Throne and let them grind his lap. The Emperor is gonna release a 10.000 year old nut which will shatter the very fabric of the galaxy. That erruption will close the cicatrix maledictum, which will severely weaken the Chaos-Gods which his soul fights constantly. With this new found respite, his soul can focus over time, to reform his body to full strengh. Finally the Emperor is reborn...through himself

[@radisvilenov9668]

#saveemp Powerwof made a song called "Resurrection by Erection" so I imagine that a callidus assassin, inquisitor Greyfax, saint Celestine, and Yvraine start twerking. And the sheer power of the twerk is enough to get the golden throne into overdrive and resurrect the Emperor.

[@tehvaniu6a]

Perturabo and the Iron Warriors are my favorites and not just from this list but of all the primarchs and legions. They are on the few who primarily use guns in what is supposed to be a sci-fi setting, their look is simple enough that its effective yet open for change. Their lore is surprisingly deep, I think Perturabo is a relatable and developed character despite or perhaps because of his flaws. He and his legion never spoke out against the status quo and the abuse that it brought them because they saw it as weakness. Eventually it became too much and it let them to destroying the last remnants of humanity within them by misplacing their rage. The guilt, self-loathing and bitterness always ate away at them until there was nothing left. It's proper tragic grimmdark and somehow still believable and oddly satisfying. They're one of the coolest villains in 40k imo.

[@consolescrub4031]

To join the train of people stating their favourite primarchs I just have to agree with the fans of the 5th. The Khan's speech about whether he will save lives and how that is his purpose gives great Helm's Deep "ride out and meet them" energy and I like the fact he is willing to compromise with Dorn as protecting big E is of ultimate importance but he will not abandon the common people to the forces of chaos even if he is putting himself at massive risk for far less practical gain than he is worth. Lords of Silence had a good point that there's so many conflicting viewpoints you can't judge by how closely their views align to yours but instead by how well they adhere to their own beliefs. It's why I have much more respect for the Khan in refusing to compromise in his inherent humanity or Mortarion for his commitment to resisting tyrants of all forms rather than the primarchs who deceived themselves like Kurze and Russ (no disrespect to the people who like them but they lied to themselves to make their path easier whether it be in just always going for the war crimes option first or deluding oneself as to when action is necessary such as the burning of Prospero).

[@enclave9497]

I love mr mousolini heresy

[@hunterjohnson9144]

Use a max revive from Pokémon #SaveEmp

[@adriandracos]

#saveemp since he's so old just unplug him and blow on the connectors like a Nintendo cartridge. 60% of the time it works every time!

[@dukedevlan5457]

#SaveEmp I would get the pheros device from Mars with the greatest politics in the galaxy

[@PZY.Studios]

18:37 both of them are awake but the lion is old cause he went to the rock that makes you old

[@brevinbigelow6212]

Give him the sloppiest top known to mankind. #SaveEmp

[@zachm5485]

#SaveEmp Don’t give him his daily breakfast of 1000 psykers. That’s actually what’s keeping him on the throne

[@Suhawk75]

when will you guys be doing another fantasy fireside episode

[@lorecrimes]

We have one in the can ready to go. Keep your eyes peeled for April =] -Remembrancer.

[@eichler721]

Great video and my cannon is the 2nd was the forgotten and was killed by the Rangdan during the Xenocide and was removed from record to show that Primarch's never lost. Or he was killed by the Void Dragon when he was released by them Emperor before he could be subdued again and then covered up.

[@1234kalmar]

#SaveEmp Feed the Emperor to a giant snake so we could devour the very gaahh togethaaa!

[@janekbalin9276]

#SaveEmp "wake the f*ck up samurai we have cathedrals to burn"

[@waynehaygood3122]

Dude you just created one of the lost primearchs lol!!!$$$+++

[@Necroid9001]

Dorn is easily my favourite.

[@PCRieffer]

Honestly out of the first ten if you don't include Apharussy (which you didn't) I love the tragic tale of Conrad

[@clintbustwood4800]

Jingle some keys and wait for Trazyn to show up and do something

[@spearishchap9979]

#SaveEmps Vashtorrr seems to be good with technology, bring him in to the throne to do repairs

[@nervmeister]

Lorecrimes comparing Ferrus Manus to a pug..........Are they sending a coded shout-out & crossover invite to Old Man Reacts?

[@Pat0p]

#saveemp I would tell the Emperor that the Imperium is tolerant towards the (good) Eldar now. Vulkan would shudder at the thought.

[@djbeast2145]

My favorite primarch is primarch #2 *REDACTED* from *REDACTED*

[@mattwilson3516]

#saveEmp I would give him over to the tyranid hive mind so he can be melted down into biomass and connect with the hive mind and be alive as part of the hive mind and live forever in the the swarm

[@joechurchill6945]

#SaveEmp cawl can you revive them emperor, yes I can just give me a landraider batter some jump cables and unfettered access to his rib cage

[@elocnkmab3977]

#saveEmp let Trazyn have him for the museum.

[@mistertaz94]

Easy solution. Tell him that Lorgar diddled one of his Custodes. #SaveEmps

[@Channel-23s]

Sangius Inner darkness was a flaw but he did not let it control him at least he went out a warrior and badass which Konrad went crazy rather then to change his ways or try differently to fight crime a better way or change the future

[@GameCommandos14]

#SaveEmp Have the noise marines play their song so loud. That the emperor gets off the Golden Throne reborn to destroy their instruments and sit back on the throne for a nap.

[@TheMichiganMachinist]

Red Baal give you wings!

[@ThexVaultxTech]

"Penelope of war"

[@AgentSqueaky]

#saveemp turn the golden throne into a mobility scooter

[@Knight1029]

The art for the 2nd Primarch is so cool. Where did you guys get the art?

[@aguspuig6615]

My biggest thanks to the editor for finding an image of Fulgrim where they dont make him look like a woman with male proportions and give him the Sanguinius treatment of just making him look like a man

[@big_tymerro]

Just get me a perc 30, a can of four loko and a blunt and I can revive him in 12 seconds #saveemp

[@Boombastus]

"Weekend at Bernie`s" starring The BigE #SaveEmp

[@eichler721]

5 of my top Primarch's on the list and my 3 favorite loyalists. Sanguinius Khan Lion Then two of the top 3 Traitors Konrad Perturabo Magnus

[@hobomainiac2641]

How would I save/kill big E? Easy. Simply ask those funny/silly guys who made the big space rings for the great journey to give me a vast quantity of warpstone/goofy rock. Yes yes! Give warpstone and I/me will save your god/emperor! -Jibjab, holy prophet of the Covenant, Bretonian hater, and lover of squats (they taste good) #saveemp

[@mateusz73]

Nostromo is also a book by Joseph Konrad

[@MistaBaze]

I’ve been alone too long 😂 I forgot how to talk ish. My retort to the furry comment was “hey I’d rather have a dog than a snake!” Tf is wrong with me 😂😂