the problem with plastic surgery

[@sapphic.flower]

I think it’s so important to criticize the plastic surgery industry and how it profits of women’s and people’s insecurities. I think some people are scared of addressing it because they don’t want to come off as anti-plastic surgery and accidentally shame those who did get it or are tempted to. It’s not that we should judge the people who wound up getting it because they’re just a product of a culture that expects them conform to beauty standards. But we should try harder normalizing diverse beauty rather than conformity.

[@jawi1460]

Exactly, it’s all about criticizing the industry and not the individual people

[@bubblegum.princess]

Yes I don’t like the plastic surgery TRENDS, but if a person wants something because they have always wanted to change it should absolutely make that choice with any pressure.

[@kagnoo]

These are my thoughts exactly. I came to the comments to say exactly this, but why mess with perfection! You said it so well 👏🏻

[@onegirloneworld]

Thank you for saying this!!

[@katherinemorelle7115]

Yep- attack the system, not individual people. And we need to understand that there are multiple forces within the system that push individual people into making those choices. We are a product of our environments, and of the choices that are presented to us. It’s not just about being insecure about your looks. As Mina mentioned, there’s a correlation between beauty and class. “Ugly” people are punished economically while people who meet beauty standards are rewarded. If someone wants to get out of poverty, but can’t because they aren’t pretty enough? That’s a huge problem. I mean, poverty itself is a problem, but we do also have beauty standards reinforcing poverty. People “look poor” based on being fat (there’s a huge correlation between poverty and obesity), on not having expensive looking makeup, on not having perfect skin, and now, on not having the right shaped face or body by way of injectables and cosmetic surgery. Looking poor hugely reduces your options through limiting careers, relationships, ability to gain loans, and can quite literally kill you given the inherent classism bias people have. And the cops are people. Looking into the system shows just how massive an issue this is, and how connected it is to other issues of class. And of course class is also connected to other issues of race, queerness, and disability among many others, as class is the one oppression that is a throughline on all others. It’s all connected, and it’s a bloody awful system. I also think it shows that what we need to do is dismantle and change the system if we really want to deal with this issue (or with many others that might initially seem unrelated). We can’t fix it without solving the thing that is supporting and reinforcing it. And not only is it a case of class reinforcing the beauty standards and therefore the cosmetic surgery industry, there’s also the profit motive of those within the industry, who will happily push that beauty-class correlation and make insecurities worse. Anything to make more money. We need to destroy capitalism and replace it with something better, is what I’m saying. You can’t fix a systemic issue without fixing the system.

[@blahblabla2350]

kinda ironic how teenage girls feel forced to look like grown women and grown women feel forced not to age like, are women supposed to look like they are in their early 20's their whole lives of something?

[@imyourhappydrug]

According to men's dating habits as they age, yes. It's very sad.

[@cancerdeath4195]

Why is the focus on women ? as if males aren't judged on there looks constantly hell more so than women these days i'm tending to see.

[@blahblabla2350]

@@cancerdeath4195 how dare i watch a video on women's beauty standards and make a comment about… women's beauty standards, I'm pretty sure if I were to watch a video on lizards' evolution through the years I'd comment about that, that's just how it works

[@aquadust]

@@cancerdeath4195 because this video is about women’s beauty standards??? it’s not a game of “who has it worse,” it’s addressing the problems on both sides and trying to reach mutual understanding

[@cancerdeath4195]

@@aquadust It's not supposed to be a game it's pandering and virtue signalling over and over and over again matching the socities allowed victim complex to spread over it pisses me off truly.

[@siljamaria]

I was recently told that I look good for my age. I'm 25. It's getting a little ridiculous, folks.

[@yumekojabami122]

People over the age of 18 are fossils 😂🥴

[@chrystianaw8256]

Gen Z think you go from 16 to 70. Their expectations on ageing have been completely corrupted

[@nothing-jl2dz]

I unironically got told that like a month after I turned 24

[@fairygodmother6603]

Lol I can relate I'm 28 and I was told by a 21 years old girl "wow I wish I could look like this when I am 28 years old"

[@emilyonizuka4698]

I was watching this documentary for one of my uni classes about beauty standards for women, and how apparently your skin starts getting worse after 15 so "it's all downhill after 15" and we all laughed so hard at that

[@sophias9686]

I think modern day feminism has somehow reverted us back to placing beauty above all other factors of feminism. I see so much media, especially now on TikTok, that encourage women to be the best version of themselves, which seems great, until they then drag in physical appearance? It’s like “go girl be a bad ass, intelligent, capable women while also being sexy!” Like why do I also need to be sexy? I can be ugly as fuck and still be a capable, amazing, intelligent woman. It’s infuriating

[@katgreer6113]

i also think the same. How could be promoting body inclusivity and acceptance, but at the same time plastic surgery is rising? Like how does that work??

[@goodingreen4736]

OMG thank you! 👏👏

[@marsisbae]

We put way too much value into being attractive. We should encourage body neutrality instead of body positive

[@epicbeans526]

@@pratishtha5740 there is no such thing as misandry im sure men will be fine

[@RainyDayWolf]

This is not about feminism this is about patriarchy and a re-labeling to catter to new generations while keeping the status quo... Which is also how some men call themselves "woke" or "feminist" or "deconstructed" to keep being a f*ck boy.

[@charlottelarochelle-compto2650]

There's just something dystopian about FACIAL FEATURES being considered "trendy" i can't get over

[@pollypocket4323]

Or body types. Utterly insane once you start thinking about it

[@jazura2]

Look at paintings throughout history. You will see how the fashion and facial 'looks' change

[@PraiseJ-Pope]

Yup. A few more decades and people wont switch their smartphones every year but their noses.

[@charlottelarochelle-compto2650]

@@pollypocket4323 it is utterly insane, and even more insane when you think we're undergoing dangerous surgeries to achieve a look that might not even be "in fashion" in 5 years or so

[@charlottelarochelle-compto2650]

@@jazura2 true, but they weren't changing as rapidly as they are now. Back then women only lived through one "trend" and now the it look is different every 3 years

[@GeorgeGlass298]

Another thing about all this is even the Kardashians still edit their photos. After their hundreds and thousands of dollars in cosmetic procedures, they still don't see themselves as beautiful enough to post pictures unedited and filtered.

[@laisa.]

Good point. And noone can believe they're especially happy... despite looks and money.

[@justrandomotaku]

Yeah, even the Kardashians themselves don't look kardashian...

[@TheDaniela3112]

Those women and other women like them are very sick. They all probably suffer from different degrees of body dysmorphia. Kim photoshopped her baby's pictures, for crying out loud. Imagine your mom editing your pictures as a kid cause she thinks you're not cute enough

[@queenb2450]

THIS!!! Like Kylie without makeup (with all her fillers) actually looks like Pepe the frog because it puffs up her cheeks, so she HAS to use major filters on Instagram which is crazy when you've spent so much money on surgery.

[@leenref6408]

ikr ! like they can't even live up to their own standers

[@geumdi]

At 15 I went for a consult for rhinoplasty. The surgeon talked to me long and hard about recovery, money, and that I had to come back for further maintenance because I was still going through puberty and my face hasn't fully grown in yet. He did photoshop detailing what he would've done which was SO minimal and ended the consult with, "You are a beautiful girl who will become a beautiful woman. Give yourself love and time, there is nothing I need to change." It's been 9 years and now my nose is my fave feature. If only more surgeons were real like this and didn't prioritize money, they would make a huge impact especially for young girls and boys. And send a message to their parents who agreed to all this and arent helping with their kids esteem.

[@Pandaluver67899]

That is an amazing person, most would not do that!

[@joob1568]

wow, so glad for you that you had a plastic surgeon like that. it's horrifying to me how many surgeons will operate on literal children to permanently change their faces - like, we all know that we aren't rational and grown up at 15. in what way are we ready to consent to this kind of surgery?

[@lydiavose5908]

I was going to get a nose job at 14 and I'm turning 16 this Monday. We ended up not having the money for it so I didn't get it. I think I'm glad I didn't get it though cause it was a random surgeon I knew nothing about and I think I like my nose now.

[@cayladelorenzo4047]

How sweet thanks for sharing 🖤

[@-Araina-]

@@lydiavose5908 I'm sure your nose is lovely, growing up and being in high school can be so brutal for your self-esteem when you're young. When I was in elementary school a kid literally told me I had a pig nose and I never forgot it, I still remember his full name and I thought about it every time I saw him in class later on in high school. I'm 23 now and I love my nose shape and I got a septum piercing at 18 to accentuate my big nose. I think in the current era it's harder than ever on teenagers to have good self-esteem because of things like facetune and Instagram giving the impression that your natural face is ugly unless it reflects the "standard beautiful face" as determined by trends and influencers like the Kardashians. Your uniqueness really does make you beautiful and interesting, though I know that sounds incredibly cliche and cheesy lol.

[@mariealayne7223]

I hate how modern feminism has declared any and all choices "empowering" so thank you for calling out plastic surgery for what is is, which is indeed not empowering.

[@cheyenne6913]

@@telepathicmagicshop Honestly, what you're describing to me sounds like liberal feminism. Like achieving equality through individual actions. In my opinion, the main problem with liberal feminism is the tendency to support capitalism. It's the kind of feminism that has been co-opted by corporations selling their weird brand of feminism. I still think there are some really good modern feminist movements. In recent years, I've found myself aligning with postmodern feminism. I don't think there's a perfect feminist theory, but I feel like looking at other feminist movements and groups can provide some good insight.

[@LovelyAngel.]

@@telepathicmagicshop yeah, Cheyenne described it perfectly. Feminism has so many types that sometimes even contradict each other. For instance there isn't much capitalism in my country and there is a lot of religion-based unfair laws which hurt women. Feminist groups have been fighting the injustice we have for years and then I go online and read comments from men in my country who only read about American liberal feminism and based on that claim that feminist movement in my country should be destroyed... it's wrong on so many levels but the basis of all of that is wrong semantics and lack of research.

[@kiriki4558]

You don't now what feminism is if you aré so willing to find excuses to villanize it and put it as a "modern" monolithe.

[@kiriki4558]

@@mariiv2412 some actions can be seen as extreme if the context Is not taken into account. And feminism have never caused or encouraged arbitrary violent actions and death based on trivial things. So ve careful when labeling something as extreme, specialy if it comes from an oppresed group.

[@hadiyahmuh385]

@@telepathicmagicshop yesss for the longest time I wanted to be a strong independent woman and I felt guilty and mad at other woman for just being a mother. and I hate how I was brainwashed and so heavily influenced without even noticing. Happy I started watching femininity videos I can't wait to be a house wife and have a family. I don't mind cooking and cleaning for a good loving man

[@Mimi-vt2om]

The fact that many of us are scared of aging in our early twenties speaks VOLUME

[@TheLastEgg08]

Something that Western societies suffer a lot from. I hope this doesn't come to my country, old women here are seen as the pinacle of wisdom.

[@kookiesenglish2405]

I don't want to look old in my early 20s😭

[@beyondtheradio]

Why do you think religion exists? People are afraid of aging. Me included.

[@hipzaameen476]

@@beyondtheradio I’m sorry but can you enlightened me on why there is connection between religion and being afraid of aging (this is a genuine question because I’m too dumb)

[@Pandaluver67899]

I'm 26 and tiktok has me feeling like i need botox

[@korvapuustit]

My biggest hang up with anti aging everything is that it only ever seems to apply to women. Like, we are expected to remain as fertile youth our entire lives while men are never ever held to that. It's actually super gross.

[@RefractedStarlight]

yup. there's definitely a few 'shameful' parts of aging for men (hair loss and even the treatment of it, weight gain from no longer having the metabolism of their youth) but 90% of age related body shaming, and probably body shaming in general, is directed at women. And it's super fun! I'm in my late 20s and trying not to think about The Wrinkles that are Surely Upon Me (they're really not noticeable and I want to not care, but I'm still aware and feeling preemptively judged. It's insidious.)

[@nehalilisays]

It's always lowkey funny to me when people see a picture/video of male Kpop idols and then go "Wow, their skin is so smooth!" - Well, yeah, because you're not used to see SPF wearing, clean shaved/waxed/lasered men wearing make-up and getting their pictures edited based on poreless-baby-skin standards. But we see pictures of women with "flawless" smooth skin all the time.

[@korvapuustit]

@GAY RIGHTS ARE HUMAN RIGHTS examples?

[@badhra7462]

@@korvapuustit i think they're a troll

[@indeedical26]

@@nehalilisays ikr. that's one reason i don't want people to obsess over how idols look, how spotless and clear their skin is, how they are always camera ready, but to "obsess" over how talented they truly are. coming from another kpop fan :)

[@abbysc417]

My main qualm with the plastic surgery industry is that it has introduced so many “flaws” into our culture where we wouldn’t see them as flaws or even notice their existence otherwise. “Laugh lines,” crows feet,” “orange peel chin,” etc are only seen as problems because they were created by an industry posing themselves as the solution.

[@Leroset]

In the past a lot of features that are considered undesirable today were considered beautiful and charming. For example: body hair, big noses/noses with dorsal bumps, thin lips, large chins, hooded/deep-set eyes, gaps in between the front teeth, a slightly crooked tooth, etc. Ironically, in East Asia, a lot of these features that are currently considered ugly in the West are actually considered incredibly desirable and sexy/cute, to the point that people in East Asia are getting plastic surgery to gain these features. In South Korea and Japan in particular, having a large nose with a bump, hooded/deep-set eyes, and sideburns on women is considered beautiful. Also, Japanese people LOVE people with slightly crooked/snaggled teeth, especially if it’s the incisors or just a few teeth. All of this goes to show that there is no true, time-tested, universal standard of beauty. Even today, what one society considers ugly or undesirable will be considered beautiful by another.

[@TherealSakuraKei]

I had some guy wish me a happy 50th birthday the other day, as a comment on my smile lines.... and honestly it hurt at first. I'm in my 30's but stress really aged me faster then I wished it had and I accept this face. I see the parts of my being that I share with my grandmothers and I'm thankful 🙏 for all they struggled through to give our parents and us the best lives they could. I'm so thankful we are talking about this. If anything I hope we can help the next generations of women feel happy in their skin the way we all never were allowed to.

[@nanamiharuka3269]

Seeing wrinkles as flaws is the worst because it often means that person is very expressive, living their best life to the fullest

[@aspannas]

@@nanamiharuka3269 Exactly, things like laugh lines should remind people of the times they laughed and had fun, normalize having a life and aging

[@huhs112]

@@TherealSakuraKei that guy is absolutely nasty. He probably would've commented anything on anybody thinking it's fine to make a joke that is mere useless insult. Easier said than done but don't listen to him. And smile lines are very sweet. Society especially when it comes to women always put them down for any age/signs of getting more adult/older than 20 which is creepy. I also hope more people especially women don't have to feel to appease towards such useless things that are mainly just for companies to gain more money

[@roshnisharma4324]

We don’t need to make plastic surgery unempowering, we need to make aging more empowering. In many cultures, the archetype of the “crone”, an aging woman is seen as the keeper of wisdom and in touch with nature in a very deep way, a woman we all can learn from. We need to respect the experience aging brings, because essentially the added years bring more knowledge. How is that not beautiful?

[@LivSenghor]

Yes to this comment!! Regardless of people's personal opinions on plastic surgery, I think over-shaming those who choose to get it will create a new problem rather than solving them.

[@sin3358]

Nah. Don't empower looks. Normalize them. Empowerment only feeds to the delusion that we're supporting a certain look, but we're really just changing one beauty standard to another one.

[@Ceri40]

As an older woman, I feel that if I want to do something to make me happy then I will do it. My body, my choice. Don't shame women who do decide on surgery. I just want to be me & look like me. It's ok to want wrinkles & it's ok to not want wrinkles. It's also ok to colour your hair or don't colour it. It should be about empowering choice & not shaming people for their choices.

[@zoev9050]

THIS!!

[@ninamarkovic22]

YES!!!!

[@scheibe2791]

Mina’s ability to bring up the 1920s in any video is commendable

[@ambergrislo1070]

So true I noticed that too ☺️

[@karlareyes1671]

It's relevant because after WWI plastic surgery became more safe (for reconstruction) and the actress that she mentioned wasn't the only jewish that go for a nose job after WWII a lot of jewish did it to avoid the stigma of their ethnic features.

[@Ash01010]

she doesn't have eyebrows

[@keroppi7087]

@@Ash01010 uh

[@AngelicAutumn]

@@Ash01010 what does that have to do with anything?

[@annaliadesigns]

I don't understand how people can say cosmetic surgery is empowering for women. It feeds on our insecurities, it takes our money (and sometimes lives), and it just leads other women to feel worse about their natural features

[@RoxyCherryRozy]

Cause women are often competitive with other women or take after one another not to be left behind in a group. This is easily noticeable like even from kindergarten level.

[@The0neWomanShow]

Spoiler alert: it isn't, but choice feminism will have you believing otherwise to distract from the real pervasiveness of patriarchy and misogyny if the things they want you to do are repackaged as a "choice" made, rather than being goaded into it.

[@MakiPcr]

It also perpetuates sexist and racist standards or beauty

[@camillefaith2005]

@@RoxyCherryRozy It's funny because people often say this, but if you really think about it, what is this force that pits women against each other from such a young age?? It's patriarchy and internalized misogyny. That is what feeds this competition. Men, or rather patriarchal systems, have made it profitable if women are constantly in conflict with each other. That is why pick-mes exist. That is why the beauty industry is so profitable for men. That is why the porn industry is so jam-packed with women. That is why cosmetic surgery is at an all-time high. A women's most valuable asset in patriarchy is her beauty and that starts with conditioning at a kindergarten level.

[@andrcgs]

@@camillefaith2005 Exactly. I'm tired of people thinking women are enemies with each other by nature ??? Like, what? It's called female socialization

[@imani0nline]

I have come to the conclusion that I don’t like cosmetic surgery as a concept because as much as it can be for “yourself”, our ideas of conventional beauty are so skewed, seasonal and rooted in systemic issues, so objectively speaking how much of it is really for yourself. You can be knowingly or unknowingly feeding into an idea of beauty that is unachievable due to its ever changing nature.

[@rj99545]

This comment should be pinned. The lines have been blurred.

[@bubblegum.princess]

I did plastic surgery for myself, but can understand how that is feeding society’s standards especially here in the Middle East.

[@sunshell]

i completely agree. how can you be doing it for yourself if you only want to change yourself because you dont fit society's standard of beauty??

[@rosa-acicularis7368]

I really think there's a conversation to be had about how gross it is to fetishize the youthfulness of women and how pedophilic beauty standards in pornography negatively impact women. Looking fuckable isn't the tax women should pay for being in the world

[@hannahcrabtree9821]

Amen. I have also seen it affect generations and known people who’s parents changed their children’s looks as children.

[@seemsfishy23]

One of the worst trends to me is the whole “this is how you age when you’re unproblematic” like… I am 27 and am developing teeny wrinkles. So are lot of people my age. I have a super expressive face and dry, sensitive skin, it happens. Something about people equating youth and beauty with being morally good is so pathetic though, more pathetic than having a wrinkle or two. What are we, a Grimm fairytale?

[@georgeorbinks8320]

I'm already noticing mild creasing in my forehead and the sides of my mouth and I'm only 23 lol. Skin ages, it's not a bad thing and I don't understand why young people get so apoplectic about their bodies going their natural route.

[@Cayliente]

Im 27 and get confused for a teenager all the time (I teach high school so that doesn’t help lol) and I’ve noticed I’m getting some forehead wrinkles! I’m like, how can I have a baby face AND wrinkles? Ive wanted to look older to be taken more seriously but then also I’m conflicted because society says I shouldn’t have wrinkles so I’m like “oh no!”

[@wren_.]

I thought it was just because white people who are racist tend to buy a lot of self tanner which wrinkles your skin a ton

[@shreyaputhran5478]

I feel like they mean that they have to be less stressed out and calculative rather than "problematic people". Honey, we have work, family, health problems and poor mental health.

[@sprigganpanda]

I'm 20 and I've recently noticed fine lines around my eyes. The forehead ones are easy I just need to keep it moisturized and they go away but the ones around my eyes are cuz I keep squinting so those are more stubborn. Whenever I skip my skincare I have fine lines by the end of the next day cuz I'm very expressive and dry. Guess imma be hella evil in my 30s lol

[@IsTheSkyUp]

i think the major, almost unspoke issue is that we (society) cannot BEAR to look at old women. they are invisible. you see it in grandmas being played by 45yo actors, in 30yo women representing anti-ageing cream with no visible wrinkles, in the trope of older men remarrying 25yos... it's terrifying and upsetting

[@AM-vk7qx]

i had this realization awhile back and honestly it saddened me. as a woman one day i’ll become invisible

[@runningfromabear8354]

I've come to this realization lately doing IVF as a 41 year old woman. I have learned this is a consequence of waiting too long to have a baby... My husband is infertile and I wasn't comfortable with doing IUI with donor sperm. My egg reserve is great. Nothing wrong with my lining. My cycle is 30 days, a little longer but not problematic. I'm pregnant on our first try and everything's great. There's nothing wrong with my fertility. 50% of women between 40 and 43 years old will get pregnant in their first year of trying. I had no idea so many people would assume I'm too old to get pregnant naturally and would need an egg donor. *shrug*

[@razmiddle9410]

​@@runningfromabear8354 Many people, including those who claimed that you were incapable of pregnancy at 41, seem incapable of understanding nuance - any woman is capable of being pregnant before menopause, but the chances (on average!) are worse the older you get. As you say, 50% of women in their early 40s get pregnant within a year of trying. And 80% of 20 - 29 year olds will get pregnant will get pregnant in their first *six months* of trying. Some women, including you, still have a good egg reserve and other indicators of fertility even in their 40s. All of these things are true, and it's sad that I tend to only see folks making extreme arguments -- it's never too late OR you'll never get pregnant beyond your early 30s.

[@nejuw]

In America perhaps

[@annamartinu1918]

It makes me sad to see that you feel this way...because I honestly find wrinkles cute. Especially those around your eyes that you get when you smile and those on forehead that show how much time you spent worrying about your loved ones...because it shows how much people lived trough and that is so beautiful...and I'm not saying it to just be nice, I'm just being honest.

[@elysia6543]

I was watching a tiktok about this exact topic and someone in the comments said "why do you need to look good to feel empowered?" and I honestly never looked at the topic the same way again. There is so much more to people than their looks that SHOULD make you feel empowered. We need to stop pretending that cosmetic surgeries are empowering and "feminist" when all they do is uphold the patriarchy and continue to reduce women to their looks.

[@Ella-tf8yv]

This!!! Needing something external (validation from others) is inherently disempowering to an individual, as is submitting yourself to patriarchal norms in a way where you tell yourself you’re not good enough in such a strong manner. Whew.

[@aprilbeson2073]

@@Ella-tf8yv No one said that the need is necessarily for external validation. Also, don't belittle the struggles of people conditioned to get at least some of the validation from their looks. There are numerous processes in play that make us self-conscious of how we look, and a tik tok comment will not erase that.

[@Author.Noelle.Alexandria]

Two things. First, if you ever wear makeup or try to dress and look nice, you are finding some sense of empowerment in your looks. If cosmetic procedures were the cost of a tube of lipstick, no one would complain. Second, not everyone who gets plastic procedures does so for others. My body was ravaged by years of major surgeries, and I ended up having “cosmetic” work done. Yes, quotes. In helping undo some of the severe scarring, excess skin (one medication made me gain hundreds of pounds that I lost), and general rebalancing, I reclaimed my body from an illness and this boosted my mental health and confidence. Anyone who thinks they have a right to tell me shit like “you should love your body for your battle scars” deserves to go through medical hell and be disfigured because everyone deserves what they think isn’t a big deal. If you get offended by that, it’s because you know it IS a big deal. We can’t accept makeup, hair dye, piercings, and tattoos as empowering if we’re going to shame other body mods. The dividing line tends to be cost. If not everyone can reasonably afford it in a few months, we act like no one should do a thing. We should shame society putting pressure on people in any way, not people who decide for themselves what they want to do with their bodies. Body-shaming people for getting work done is still body-shaming, and it results in people who have a feature naturally being accused of lying and being shamed, and it sends the message to impressionable young people that there still is a look they need to aim for, and that look is whatever isn’t trendy.

[@Awesomeninja54]

Imo this is the main issue with body positivity, like why should your validation come from physical appearance if this is a feminist movement? Makes no sense. It would be more logical to value people as a whole person than judge one aspect of them

[@notaburneraccount]

Yesss 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[@PopChanx]

I hate this narrative that plastic surgery is "empowering". It might "fix" some of your insecurities, but you're still complying and submitting to a norm that is in place to specifically demean others.

[@libertines24]

yup it bothers me how we as a society has made it okay to "fix" yourself through surgery. Bums me out

[@harperbrush7712]

Yesss finally someone else says this

[@brianne8254]

That's like saying getting educational tutoring to improve your understanding of a topic is complying with a norm that is in place to shame less intelligent people. Are cosmetics in place to demean others, as well?

[@larkfly9273]

yes! i wish more people would say this, i'm so with you

[@chloe-fy4wc]

@@brianne8254 Your analogy with education doesn't make sense at all

[@emmacooper4286]

I also hate that if someone is "aging badly", society blaces the blame on them like "oh they partied too much, they must not have taken care of themselves" etc when in reality, most of the way you age comes down to genetics. Also, I was watching a 90s movie not too long ago, and it was so weird seeing young actors in their early 20s with those natural fine lines on their faces because today, people in their 20s (on TV/social media esp) have a ton of filler so their skin resembles a toddler's. It's so bizarre.

[@yuenmienyu]

this reminds me of acne too! like when somebody has even a tiny bit of acne, especially as a teen, people bombard them will claims of not taking care for their skin, eating too much oily/sugary foods like-

[@diabloakland]

It looks like scary mission impossible movie stretched out masks lol. We don’t even have toddler skin on movies it’s like rubber skin

[@RainyDayWolf]

Well yes, but also drug and alcohol abuse do age you and mess with your body... We're getting to a point where wealthy people can "revert" the damage while poor can't... Like how Lindsay Lohan was able to restore her face.

[@user-gh8bm8ct5t]

Also, why do we need to make an excuse to villify white people? I’m white, and although I’m in my early 20’s I’m starting to see a few lines, most likely due to genetics since I’m healthy and take care of my skin, which made me realize how deeply I internalized the notion that “white people age like milk”. I literally feel ashamed to go outside because I worry without getting fillers/botox I’ll be deemed the “bad” white person, and seem racist just because I’m getting wrinkles from a young age. Like I’m no longer able to partcipicate in these conversations because I’ll be hit with the insult of being an old ugly whitey while black/asian people are young forever. Wtf??? Why are wrinkles bad in the first place, as if they render you a complete invalid societally? Why do we want to look like babies forever anyway? Ew

[@josei1624]

@@yuenmienyu The shlw ypung royals actually has actors with skin texture and it's kind of sad how amazing it feels to watch this show because of it.

[@MJIAG]

The fact that we‘re not seeing aging women around us is quite concerning honestly.

[@ingridelknermusic]

Watch Good Girls, The L Word Generation Q... A lot of stars who once upon a time would have been phased out are holding strong.

[@_swesters_]

​ @livingthedream Not what they meant and you know it

[@sanians5685]

@@josefah4952 ok? how is that relevant

[@butter8552]

@@josefah4952 clap if u care no seriously clap if u care

[@kgone5741]

plz go outside

[@wattw3900]

It makes me upset when people are always like “you haven’t aged😍” all the time because it implies that aging is a bad thing when it’s totally normal

[@samanthaj9286]

Be honest, do you want them to say? "Wow you've aged!".. I get what you mean but pretty sure no one wants that either

[@wattw3900]

@@samanthaj9286 no id rather people just compliment people on how they look without their age having anything to do with it lol

[@ang4588]

@@samanthaj9286 … They can compliment someone without bringing up age at all lol

[@Alberto-ny7kf]

@Oki O so you shouldn't ever compliment women's looks?

[@robynbirde]

Yes I've stopped saying things like that as compliments, like "you look so good for your age" or "you look so young". We're taught that these are compliments but they're really just implying that someone should be uglier because they're old, or that looking younger is somehow better, when it's really not.

[@micaveq7224]

The thing that bothers me most of plastic surgery is that for most women, this expense starts in their 30s-40s. This is the prime time to invest in your financial independence and retirement. While men are allowed to pursue their wealth, women have an additional pressure to spend thousands to look like they belong. Injections, hair treatments, facials etc add up fast. At 36, this is the conversation I have often with my cohort of professional women. We all feel the invisible pressure to look like we are aging gracefully - somehow okay with being old(er) without showing any signs.

[@ambergrislo1070]

This right here yes!!!! Thank you for talking about this

[@maleahlock]

Omf Thor. Yes. This.

[@charmeeart4574]

I disagree, the prime time to invest in your financial independence/retirement is NOW. Ladies please take charge of your financial futures, and be vigilant in learning how to invest. Even if you aren't earning now.. you can be ready when you are!

[@siracornful]

+

[@siracornful]

Also! A lot of plastic surgeons are men. So instead of investing thousands into your own financial future you might be lining the pockets of men who already is making millions.

[@andrewharris8461]

Also I remember hearing Eugene Lee Yang talk about how he felt ugly growing up and how his mother said “why are you trying to hide your family’s face?” and that really stuck with me

[@aestheticarmy3689]

honestly this comment really stuck with me :) every time I look in the mirror and see my nose it reminds me of my grandma

[@strawberrycherrybaby]

Idk why but this just made me start crying lol, I have a little son and he makes me love my own face so much more. I see so much beauty in his face and it makes me see more in my own face.

[@exp-io853]

Thats a hit.

[@exp-io853]

@@strawberrycherrybaby thats totally sweet. Im gonna cry. The amount of love you see in him is also the amount of love you see in you

[@exp-io853]

@@aestheticarmy3689 my face shape is my dads i still get insecure sometimes because of the small face standard but like its not even that big. This is the face of my mom and dad thst i should be proud off and maybe pass it onto my child

[@MrKikip1992]

I mentioned getting fillers to my Grandmother once and she said “You're going to look like me eventually, why wouldn't you want that?” I thought that was such a great point because I always thought she and my mother were so beautiful...why wouldn't I want that beautiful maturity for myself?

[@danimarie22802]

Beautiful maturity. I love this!

[@colbyjade4321]

This is so pure!

[@oliveu535]

I feel the same way!!! And I feel self conscious about my nose but I think my mother is beautiful and we look the same, so why don’t I think that about myself? It’s a matter of being more critical of the self or whatever

[@m.falcon6412]

A great point! ♥

[@ezrairene5503]

Most beautiful thing i've read today

[@sheridanfrancis4814]

My stance, with beauty culture in general, is that there’s nothing inherently feminist about it. If you want plastic surgery that’s okay, but please don’t tell me it’s a feminist empowerment thing. I’m not shaming anyone because of that. You don’t have to make all of your decisions based around if they are or aren’t feminist, I certainly don’t when I buy and wear makeup. You don’t have to rationalize and make up excuses for everything you do. As soon as you’re able to accept that not all choices made by women are feminist ones you open yourself up to thinking a bit more critically about the ones you make, and start the path to learning to accept not living up to societal standards.

[@ester-fj7ip]

YES!! I'm so fed up with the whole "whatever a woman decides to do is feminist because it was her decision" bullshit 😭😭

[@sheridanfrancis4814]

@@ester-fj7ip I understand the need to defend your choices, but sometimes it’s okay to just accept that society conditions us and not all our choices are what we would choose without that conditioning

[@yvonnemwanzile4955]

Are these choices anti feminist though ??

[@mrscarstairs]

@@yvonnemwanzile4955 Personally I would not consider them anti-feminist, just aligned with cultural gender norms. IMO, anti-feminism is an intentional hatred for the feminist movement.

[@sheridanfrancis4814]

@@yvonnemwanzile4955 not anti-feminist so much as just not actively feminist. You’re not railing against it, which is what anti-feminist would imply.

[@scarymonsterzz]

People say “just don’t get cosmetic procedures if you don’t like them” without any understanding of how beauty standards affect everyone, including those who can’t or won’t get procedures. Remember a couple years ago when EVERYONE got super into skincare? A lot of us got really into it because we saw it as “preventing aging.” I was 27 and I thought I HAD to start using expensive serums nightly to “prevent aging” because I knew I wouldn’t be able to afford cosmetic surgery in the future. I’m only 29 now and I honestly already feel ugly by today’s standards, because they’re so fixated on appearing HYPER youthful. And younger generations ARE going to have no understanding of what natural aging looks like. I already see so many young people who look at older people around them who are aging naturally and think they’re just “not taking care of themselves.” They don’t understand how much money and effort it takes to maintain that youthful look.

[@funnyvalentinesglorioushai2227]

Ok, your explanation of why we should appreciate natural aging and all is great, but I am just here to clarify that effective skin care against aging doesn't have to be expensive. You only need to add a retinoid to your routine. Anything else from double cleanse, to to moisturize, to sunscreen, you should be doing anyways (these is not to shame anyone that can't afford any skincare steps, but rather to show that the cosmetic industry overprices the most basic stuff). Just watch Dr Dray here on KZbin and pick the cheapest recommendations)

[@TheLily97232]

Even on Facebook we see videos of "look, she is 60 and so slim and muscular and looks so youthful. She is healthy, what's your excuse ?" As if everybody needed to look like that. It affects 30 year olds already it's sad

[@nompumelolo]

The skincare era caused me so much distress. I literally ended up using a skin lightening cream to remove PIH and I kid you not my face got 50x worse ( went from very slight PIH over both cheeks to damn near melasma all over my face ).

[@nompumelolo]

The skincare era caused me so much distress. I literally ended up using a skin lightening cream to remove PIH and I kid you not my face got 50x worse ( went from very slight PIH over both cheeks to damn near melasma all over my face ).

[@funnyvalentinesglorioushai2227]

@@nompumelolo omg, I am so sorry to hear that. May I ask if you used sunscreen while using the treatment? Also consulting a dermatologist or getting tips for dermatologist here in KZbin might help. Thing like putting sunscreen on, properly removing sunscreen and makeup, using niacinamide, azelaic acid, vitamin C or retinoids for hyperpigmentation and moisturizing your skin are all thing that are recommended by dermatologist. And you can search for those tips yourself! I wish you a lot of success in your skin care journey. Also, melasma or no melasma, we are all beautiful people. I myself suffer form hyperpigmentation because of depression and untreated acne

[@clownsnatch6939]

Im a Native american girl, and I vividly remember wishing to Santa to make me white because I wanted to be pretty like a princess. Today I realize just how much beauty standards subconsciously affect us on a daily basis as I still feel self conscious about the Native body type I sport (wide shoulders and narrow hips) Even if I spent my youth with incredibly supportive parents who told me I was beautiful everyday. So sad some girls will never realize that their value is not calculated on how snuggly they fit into the white skinny mold! 😢 Great video btw ❤️

[@liyre4189]

oof yeah i'm East-Asian and grew up in a very white suburb. i wanted to be white so bad.

[@revinaque1342]

Same. I'm Southeast Asian and I grew up in Canada. I spent so much time wishing I was blonde and blue-eyed like my classmates. It was a huge relief to finally move back to Southeast Asia where everyone looked like me. 😅

[@NonaMoreau]

Okay I’m a random stranger from the internet, AND I won’t tell you that you are beautiful just the way you are, because that is kinda enforcing the same thing. What I will tell you is that you are totally awesome and I got this warm fuzzy feeling from reading your comment for some reason. So yeah. You made the world a little warmer and fuzzier 😄

[@Indomitable_Alykat]

Mixed Native here and I felt this way too growing up. I used to cry because I didn't look like Barbie and because there were no Disney princesses that really looked like me. :/ I used to hate my features and when I was really young, I used to fantasize about dyeing my hair blonde and getting blue contacts so I could "finally be pretty". That insecurity is still something I struggle with. It sucks that Eurocentric beauty standards have fucked us up to such a degree that even as children, we absorb this thought that we are not enough

[@yuenmienyu]

this is kinda relatable. I’m Arab (fully Lebanese) and I’ve been insecure about my race-influenced looks (colour of my hair, skin tone) for a long time. you’re beautiful and you have every right to be proud of your culture.

[@Amayram21]

The whole thing about plastic surgery being “empowering” is just using choice feminism as a marketing tool and telling women buying ___ product “is empowering cause your a woman! that made her own choice!” Without question why they made that choice in the first place. Even when people get plastic surgery it doesn’t erase insecurities they had before. I’m not shaming the people who get plastic surgery cause there are other reasons other than just for beauty. The people who do get it just for beauty shouldn’t be shamed either. It’s the companies that convince they need it/ marketing it as feminist to make it more normalized even though they are just upholding impossible standards.

[@underwirez]

then what's the point of plastic surgery, maury.

[@aspannas]

@@underwirez wdym what’s the point?? Did you not watch the video? Plastic surgery isn’t just for aesthetic purposes, it’s been used for reconstruction after damage to the face and body, for trans people, to help medical issues such as deviated septum that makes it hard to breath for people etc.

[@underwirez]

@@aspannas so why is everyone making such a big deal out of nothing and making it seem like everyone should avoid plastic surgery? also i asked maury, not you.

[@aspannas]

@@underwirez the whole issue completely went over your head didn’t it?? Watch the video. I just answered your comment, no need to be so pissy about it. Also who is “Maury”??? The person you replied to is Mary*.

[@faethfully]

@asia i feel like you might genuinely just not understand the point of the video. the issue isn’t with people getting plastic surgeries individually, the issue is that the beauty standard has created a certain look that’s hyper youthful. besides the fact that deeming one face as “the most beautiful one” is already bad, it also pressures people into getting it to avoid looking “old” since it’s so prevalent. aging is a natural part of life, yet the beauty standard is pretty much shunning it. also, in the video, mina literally said she doesn’t have ANY problem with people themselves getting it.

[@francescamenconi4665]

I hate that ageing “gracefully” is pieced together with surgery.. like, ageing and entering that new stage in your life is so beautiful.

[@aspannas]

I agree, things like laugh lines should remind people of the times they laughed and had fun in life, it's sad that things like that have become something so negative.

[@smoothblink]

Great point. "Grace" is considered anything that doesn't REALLY show your age.

[@HeyyyitsBell]

It isn’t beautiful to age, unless decay is beautiful. Still, there is the possibility for wisdom and dignity in old age, which is better than physical beauty.

[@smoothblink]

@@HeyyyitsBell I'm not sure about that. There's physical experience gained as well as mental experience gained. People talk about laugh lines, like, you could see that as just your skin cells sagging and falling apart, or you can see it as evidence of laughter and joy. Frown lines are often used in photography to portray intelligence or seriousness. White or salt and pepper hair is another example of something that you could see as decay scientifically (the hair strand losing it's ability to keep color), but it's also a look a lot of people rock. All of these can be attractive in a physical way, I think. I'm also not sure that decay CAN'T be beautiful, either. Beauty is cultural, personal, subject to change and beauty is also poetry. So it is, at least partially, what you make of it. I think it's very sweet what you said about wisdom and experience mattering more though. It's a tough concept to boil down. Thanks for making me think a little bit.

[@katehynes8769]

I cried SO hard on my 25th birthday because I thought I was going to start looking old from then on out. I even booked a consultation for fillers but backed out of it. Social media has really warped people's ideas of what aging looks like, it's okay to have some fine lines or dark circles. Skin isn't made to be immobile and smooth like marble

[@yumekojabami122]

Your so young. Why do people in their 20s think they are in their 70s?

[@anyap4347]

It’s so bad how we just can’t enjoy our 20’s, instead I end up worrying every year that I’m “old”. Logically I know I’m not but it’s this societal BS that there’s some ticking clock after you turn 18 as a woman.

[@nangshwe791]

I'm 24. One woman staff told me I looked old just because I didn't wear makeup like her. I was very upset at that time but I feel better now. And I have one line on my forehead from frowning a lot but I can accept it now. I thought to myself people aren't that different if we peel the skin layer.(Edit: I meant to say it's all the same muscles, blood and bones, etc underneath the skin 😅) I also spend less time on social media. So, I am happier than before about my appearance these days.

[@JamzYamz7]

I turned 24 a few weeks ago & I relate to you so much! I’m finally educating myself on feminism, etc. Hating myself isn’t fun :/

[@sydney58279]

I also just turned 25 and I’ve had this thought so many times. “I’m 25, I’m so old now, might as well pack it up.”

[@oliviacompas]

im 16 and this past year i had a breast reduction. for me it was honestly the most empowering thing. ive always had a small frame, but my breasts were huge and covered my stomach. they didnt fit my body at all. thats all that people saw in me. i was “the girl with huge tits” and it was really dehumanizing. im so glad i had it done even though i am so young

[@Hala-pu1uf]

I'm so glad that you're happy and comfortable now! Never feel ashamed bc we only live once so we should do what we pleaee.. Imo I think breast reduction is an important surgery bc if we put aside the aesthetic side, the breasts sometimes are too heavy and may cause serious back pain in the future.

[@catalinacaro8183]

Also, you probably would need that operation in the future bc it would bring you back problems that sometimes are not reversible, is better that you got it now :3

[@darkydoom]

That is definitely a health issue. Look after your spine! And just carrying all that weight and the stretch. You did the right thing. Glad you're feeling good

[@ah5721]

I'm glad you were able to get surgery for a reduction! i had a coworker who had a small frame 5'2" large US 34G breasts and had to wear a corset at work so her breasts didn't hurt her. hope you feel better and don't get as many sexist dehumanizing comments.

[@AmandineYlan]

For me, breast reduction can be considered in the same category as the reconstructive surgeries Mina mentioned at the start of the video. I know it's covered by all provincial healthcare in Canada, to some extent (depending on size and/or back/neck pain)!

[@amilcaraguirre6600]

When I was younger I read Percy Jackson and the lighting thief, and there's a moment where Percy describes his father Poseidon. He says that he has wrinkles in his face from "smiling over the years". I thought that was so cool, and that when I got old I would like to be like that. With the perspective of a man, I think that it's so sad that girls are raised with the idea that getting old is something they should avoid

[@dianalove539]

It’s different because Poseidon is a man. Don’t you know standards for men and women are different? People like the old dad look. They like the grey hairs and aged look. People even accept dad boss. Standards are a LOT more attainable for men

[@amilcaraguirre6600]

@@dianalove539 I know right! That's basically what I'm saying. I was taught as a child that looking old is something natural and that I should feel good in my aging body. So it's really sad that society has brainwashed women into thinking that looking old is something they should try to avoid

[@emma7933]

Girl here, I remember reading that line when I was about twelve and also thinking it would be cool to look like that when I was older, and I try to keep more realistic expectations in mind now that I am eighteen and keep getting facial suncream marketed to me because I apparently I need to act now if I don't want to look like a disgusting hag when I grow up (/s just to clarify). I think the idea that you should regularly use suncream for anything other than avoiding skin cancer (my future dream job is mostly outdoors) is kind of ridiculous now but when I was sixteenish I am afraid that I did fall for a lot of the skincare hype. It turns out ending puberty is actually the only thing that has noticeably affected my skin.

[@hoaxghost3268]

I recall that exact part too! It always stuck with me... I find there's a nice beauty that occurs in people as they age thats so under-estimated. There's always something warm and comforting about older faces that gets completely erased with the presence of botox or surgery. The loveliest smiles I ever saw came from people who had a lot of wrinkles in their face

[@Pomagranite167]

True buy we need to start applying it to women. Sometimes I do look in the mirror and hyper focus and go "oh no i have wrinkles and creases around my eyes and mouth. I'm young!" And immediately follow up with "bc I have good family and friends who keep me smiling and laughing my face off to the point where it crinkles" and thats truly a fucking blessing. I'm okay looking like I've lived a happy emotive life bc tbh, that IS more important than being young forever.

[@catcreme]

The scariest part of cosmetic surgery is that literal 18-year-olds are getting it because they're scared of aging. In what dystopian society do we live in? I don't have anything against people doing whatever they want, but getting cut open for non-emergency procedures is so scary to me.

[@victoriacupcake1263]

It's so sad to see such young women doing botox when they don't even have anything to inject it in... like why? I dont get it 😕 they look young, they don't need this shit

[@monkiram]

I know right? I need a surgical procedure for a medical condition and I've put it off for years because I've never had a surgery and I've been scared (that's not good either because it could improve my quality of life, also COVID delayed it too when I had decided to finally get it). And it's so weird to me that people are too scared to get a vaccine to keep them alive but will get a whole surgery they don't need.

[@LPOnePiece30]

Many are even minors, I‘ve seen 14-17 years old with some fillers

[@peggedyourdad9560]

Wtf, at that age all someone really needs is a good skincare routine for the look they want.

[@mariachi3217]

I mean free money for the plastic surgeons ig

[@riadsouza]

I hate that women empowerment is only important when it comes to enhancing our bodies to fit the beauty standards of society but when it comes to actual women empowerment such as abortion laws, equal pay and other liberty-focused choices, it's no longer important.

[@kelianburo8910]

period

[@wiredvibe1678]

Abortion is not illegal and the equal pay act was passed in the 1960's. We just ask you pay for your birth control and your abortions with your own money... is that too much to ask?

[@Lisa-ob8sf]

@@wiredvibe1678 Pretty sure in Texas abortion is illegal now? Including for rape victims and cases of incest

[@KatelynnNicole8]

In TX, women are losing their rights. Abortions are illegal past 6 weeks, even in cases of rape or incest. Other southern states like Mississippi are making healthy abortions impossible as well. Also Texas made a whistleblower law and hotline so every day citizens can tattle are people receiving or performing abortions after 6 weeks. Crazy most women and especially teenage girls don’t even know they’re pregnant until 8 weeks

[@arias1792]

@@wiredvibe1678 by the way, neither the first comment or the video are just about the U.S.A.

[@robyn6454]

Here’s the catch guys: something cannot be “empowering for women” if it is only accessible for a select few highly privileged women, particularly when these women engaging with the practises further ostracises the women outside of this category!

[@megsley]

it's like that saying "it is neither radical nor revolutionary if it is inaccessible to poor people."

[@seaurchinted]

THIS and the fact that if those privileged women decide they don't like their lip filler or butt lift (just using random examples), they can afford to get them changed or removed. And once the trend for all those features have fazed out, it leaves women who saved up for months or years with a feature that they purposely changed to fit the trend that they they cant afford to reverse. I don't even have the time to touch upon how lip fillers or BBLs appropriate features that women POC are still ruthlessly shamed for- and now celebrities and rich people are basically revered for having those features through artificial means. Such an unfair standard all around.

[@hateheterosexuality0]

WTF?! Phinoplasty was made for people, who can't breathe!!! Now know, stupid?!

[@FayeLawnKrack3d]

It's like the story of Medusa and Athena. Athena is a glittering, beautiful goddess, so she can make her own choices. She has status. Medusa gets blamed for being raped BY ATHENA HERSELF because she's only a "lowly" human.

[@tiffanyferg]

The cost and effort involved in “beauty maintenance” really can’t be overstated. The other day I was on the microblading subreddit - I had my brows micro bladed in 2016 and it was promoted as “semi permanent” makeup, said I could expect the pigment to fade within a year or so… but it’s been over four years and I still have some visible pigment! The color changed from medium brown to a warmer almost orangey tone, which luckily doesn’t look too bad on me but is still visible under my brow hairs. I was reading a bunch of horror stories of people who got this done thinking it was just a fun thing to try out for a bit, but now they’re stuck with leftover pigment years later. Some have faded color that goes way beyond their natural hairs, or was a shape they weren’t happy about to begin with, so now they have to cover it with makeup everyday - so frustrating that a trend that’s meant to save time on your brow routine could totally backfire. Worst of all it can be incredibly expensive and difficult to remove the last pigment, if it’s possible at all. I think a lot of procedures can be like this. To potentially spend so much time and money (plus experience pain or discomfort) to do AND undo something is just exhausting! Really makes you reconsider whether it’s worth the risk at all.

[@enchanteddryad6500]

I made so much mistakes with hairdye that way too.

[@MA-zg2pz]

I’m so sorry, thanks for sharing your experience. I have always felt so much pressure to do micro blading, eye lash extensions, Botox etc. because my sisters are SO into being physically perfect. They’re also both hairstylist so have to look their best at all times. I ran the eye lash and micro blading procedures by my dermatologist and she explained why and how theyre leading to some really unfortunate outcomes. So I never went through with it. My sisters look amazing and I don’t think they’ve had adverse reactions yet thankfully but I do worry about them band wagoning on every beauty trend and going to what I feel is extremes sometimes in their early 20s even. I fear it’s only a matter of time before they have permanent issue(s).

[@MsAnnastaziah]

This is probably my biggest issue with cosmetic procedures. They’re so expensive that even the “non-invasive” ones like botox and fillers costs thousands of dollars but their primary target is women - who on average earn way less than men! So the little money we get we’re so readily spending it on nothing! Just blowing it on $300 hair styles, $100 lash extensions, $1000 fillers, and ten thousands of dollars on surgeries. I don’t think most of us earn the money to keep up with it but it seems like everyone around me is getting these treatments. I guess that’s why they have to veil it in “empowerment” and “self-care” nonsense.

[@paulaaguirre4855]

Why stop the conversation with plastic surgery. Let's talk about cosmetic dentistry! People endure YEARS of pain with braces, the hassle of the retainer, the expensive visits, and do not get me started with crowns/veneers. And absolutely no one bats an eye! No finger pointing! Compare that, for example, with a nose job. I had one and never felt insecure nor ugly about my nose prior to doing it. The recovery was great, 0 pain, have had worse colds. Looked "normal" in a week or so. I think that plastic surgery can be (and should be?) Thought as something neutral. It's not like we don't ALL change our appearance (influenced on current trends)!

[@rj3892]

I've been waiting to get microbladed brows bc I keep thinking about what I would look like if it had been available in the 90's when I was a teen 😕 I would have the thinnest darkest brows! I worry that any brow style will come in and out of fashion so I'd rather use makeup that I can take off.

[@benicedarnit]

I got plastic surgery when I was 18. Specifically breast implants because I had triple A size breasts. I regret it SO MUCH. As I got older I realized how graceful and beautiful my natural body was, and how every body has a 'flow' to it that I was able to see once I paid more attention to women I found beautiful in everyday life. If anyone is reading this and considering plastic surgery, at the very least please wait until you're older than 18 even if you are mature for your age.

[@kiks4757]

And I as somebody with DD/E cup boobs can see smaller boobs becoming more trendy. The grass is greener on the other side!

[@prettypleasewithsugarontop4858]

I’m really busty and I wish i had your body type I’m sorry you regret your decision

[@aprilbeson2073]

@@kiks4757 smaller chest may become trend, but the acceptance does not (and I doubt it will ever) include flat chest. Women with an F cup are not dreaming for a tripple A. Women with a flat chest (which, by the way internet, is not a round, bouncing B cup) don't crave for a D+ cup. There is a perception of the ideal breast size that ranges somewhere in the middle, and leaves no place for acceptance for anything in the left or right side of the scale. And it's not just a matter of acceptance or the need/ pressure to look sexy. I think that for one, the struggle to find clothes that are comfortable, fit and look good for women of bigger/smaller breast size is a very real thing. Decent thrift shops and inclusive brands are not an option for everyone. I am a 34AA, and live in a country where no store sells below the A cup. A cups are very rare, only found on bralettes, and the only available option is the 32A-which I am not. Online shopping options are very limited, sell brands that we already have and have great shipping costs. The tailoring tradition is practically forgotten. The only time in my life that I wore something that fit, was a Victoria's Secret bralette that a friend bought for me while on a trip. So there is a range of breast size (as well as body shape and size in general) where the grass is objectivly quite green. That's because these sizes are supported by public image, social media, general perception and clothing industry. This rant was based on my personal experience, but I've spoken with enough women that are on the large breast size scale to know that they face the same issue (and others issues too) So as much as I have come to accept my body and try to find ways to make it look good, it would have been quite nice to be born with a more norm-conforming body.

[@wheretao6960]

@@aprilbeson2073 tell me about it, most women don't even wear the right bra sizes or types. Bra companies only run with generic sizes and it sucks for many women. I'm an adult but my Asian genes made me so that I can only wear band size 30 or below as anything above that is lose as fk like am I supposed to get a rib expansion surgery now?????? Bra companies really don't care enough to cater to women despite their advertisements saying so, and those that do are usually online but just not affordable thanks to shipping costs costing more than the bra itself sigh.

[@RoxanneLavender]

@@wheretao6960 I'd like to know why women who do not need the support of bras worry so much about wearing bras? bras were made to lift and hold-in large and heavy breasts. Mine are large and heavy, if they were small and perky, i would never wear a bra, i'd wear like, a form-fitting crop-top under my clothes tho flatten my nips a bit in case it gets chilly, but that's about it. Why do small-breasted women stress about the subject of bras it's completely unnecessary. I can't even find a supportive bra, i'm gonna buy a chest-binder a size or two too big and see if that works.

[@XxEvilTiggerxX]

I think it's also important to note that prior to the last century, the emphasis was on padding and other methods to achieve the fashionable silhouette of the day, not physically changing your actual body. Big butts are on trend? Bum roll under your skirt. Bigger chest needed? A cage corset with padding. And so on and so forth. I've heard women who work in re-enactment saying they actually feel so comfortable in their clothes because underneath all the skirts and the padding and the stays, who knows what they actually look like. Every day is a "good body" day. Clothes were also tailored to individual shapes and were as flattering as possible. Clothes weren't a one style fits all. I once read a pattern for a jacket with different instructions on how to make it even depending on whether the person hunches or not. Can we go back to tailoring clothes and not bodies please 😅

[@kokirea]

This comment should be at the TOP

[@youallneedjesus7430]

Unfortunately, tailoring is not affordable at all and never was.

[@Ella-tf8yv]

This right here👏👏👏

[@Pinkrevenge101]

Applause 👏🏽

[@Pinkrevenge101]

You can self learn anytime n only get things tailored that u rlly like

[@dianehong1217]

This was a very smart take on the subject. I am 52. The skin on my face started dropping a few years ago. I always looked young for my age ( people told me constantly) I definitely don’t look 35 anymore. I am not going to lie, it doesn’t feel great to see your face change. However, I see getting older as an opportunity to grow, internally. Our society values the external, who you are outside, what you look like, how much money you have. I choose to focus on healthy living, healthy relationships, expanding my mind and my art. I also love clothes, so I still have fun with that. Getting older or aging actually affords you some freedom from the noise outside. I have more time to focus on my happiness.

[@begood4786]

Wonderfully said Diane! You are a true beauty!

[@Spewwow]

I am very grateful to read what you wrote. You are beautiful inside and, I am sure, out too. Have a great day!

[@truongcaoanggtvttrunguongi5263]

beautiful words

[@lordarthur2165]

I agree with you! When I was younger I thought I would die before being 18 because of how depressed and hopeless I felt, but now that I am 20, I want to get older, I want to see myself changing as if it is a reward "I am still alive, I did it" Aging is beautiful too, it's a different beauty that's all. I hope you are having a great day!

[@exp-io853]

Wonderful! It also made me think that aging is a sign that we have gone through time. Whether we enjoyed it or not, we have experienced a lot. Isnt that supposed to be natural and not the other way around? It's kinda funny how we have to naturalized the natural :)

[@solarsatori]

The funny thing about cosmetic surgery to me is i've seen so many influencers who actually end up looking older after getting work done. Like, they look 35 but are really 23.

[@The0neWomanShow]

Same, for me Bella Hadid comes to mind. Don’t get me wrong she’s pretty but I feel she’s heading into the uncanny valley and that angular look makes her look more in her 30s than 20s.

[@lilspacecoupe1585]

Lol just say tana mongeau

[@jefrreyjeffery2192]

Because early 30s is considered ideal age for beautifulness. It's the age when you have lost your baby fat with more rugged beauty and have not aged much.

[@mistress.villaina7591]

@@The0neWomanShow for bella it is clear her parents went to the surgeon asking for carla bruni's face. it looks so odd to me because it wasn't even an enhancement of her natural features but a transplant of someone else's face. perhaps she looks older too because they put carla's face on a younger girl.

[@The0neWomanShow]

@@mistress.villaina7591 yeah I get the same 'transplant' feeling too, she's gorgeous but Jamie Lee Curtis recently said that plastic surgery is wiping out generations of beauty and I fear she might be right. This isn't to shame her at all, but just indicative of a larger trend.

[@Tanya.2007]

"There are some universal truths" "Sunset, flowers, *Keanu Reaves* " YES

[@oliviagrace837]

omg I acc love Keanu 😩

[@Niobesnuppa]

He is beautiful both inside and out!

[@skyedots]

When that picture of him popped up i felt joy. Its so cute and wholesome

[@vaishnavis5319]

Was looking for this comment!!!

[@DaisyLoe]

thats one of my fave pics of him ever. HES SO SWEET

[@FredericChen]

This is such an important video

[@_luc1d385]

I completely agree btw I absolutely love your videos

[@eduardorodas4497]

She explains it better than I ever could have

[@ithinkillmakeulaugh9062]

Omg yall should calab

[@TheChubbyJenny]

You’re an important video

[@TheChubbyJenny]

Person*

[@IsSarahPi]

It's quite sad that Anne Hathaway is in that meme about not aging considering she's only in her late 30s.

[@jadecoolness101]

This makes me think about that one article about Keanu Reeve's wife being called "brave" for, basically, existing outside as an older woman who displays signs of aging and NOT looking depressed and ashamed.

[@notaspeck6104]

Bruhhhhhhh… like do they realise how condescending they are? Like imagine not needing 8 layers of plastic surgery and Botox and Gucci to love your life. Oh…the horror 😂

[@AA-iy4gm]

Condescending and also empty inside, super hollow so they try to fill it with that fake stuff and deflect their sadness by making fun of others

[@Kaalokalawaia]

Ladies and gents. Be aware that fillers don't just "go away". You may think they do because your Lips (or whatever location) thin out over time. But they have been shown to stay in the face for up to 12 years. What does happen is that the filler can migrate around the face, sometimes into layers that you DO NOT want them to be. In addition, adding too much filler can lead to your face becoming rounder, and even with a professional trying to remove the filler, it is sometimes not possible. Buyer beware.

[@beccangavin]

Yes. Some of my favorite K-Pop idols ended up looking like their faces were sort of - melty - because they got fillers and then more fillers and then more fillers in an effort to stay youthful looking.

[@astrid5012]

What about botox? Does that go away with time or is it the same way as with fillers?

[@Author.Noelle.Alexandria]

@@astrid5012 Botox is temporary. It’s also got a lot of medical uses like for migraines.

[@apurbakoner7690]

@@beccangavin wait which one? I can only think of Bom, but just checking.

[@beccangavin]

@@apurbakoner7690 Bom was so cute. YG is the worst. All of the girls in 2ne1 were beatiful and talented BEFORE they changed their faces. She's still cute because she's Park Bom but I hardly recognized her the last time I saw her. Sadly, it makes it hard to like BP because every time I see them I think "That's the younger model YG traded 2ne1 in for" which really isn't fair to Black Pink. Sorry, small rant. Hate YG with passion.

[@l0nelyl0nelyl0ser]

Not very fun fact: my friend trained to be a receptionist for a plastic surgeon and she learned that when people come in for a procedure, doctors are supposed to compliment them but also insinuate that there’s definitely room for improvement, which adds up bc my sister had a consultation for a boob job and the (creepy) surgeon said her breasts were “the perfect shape, just too small but if they were bigger they would be just perfect” I guess we love the manipulation tactics 😬 or not

[@rowanatkinsonn]

I wanna know more!

[@tikusblue]

It makes sense on multiple levels. Many plastic surgeons would just have that mentality in the first place, that almost everything there's room for improvement. Because the job probably attracts visual people and perfectionistic people to a degree. Then there would also be surgeons who say those things purposely as a sales tactic. At the end of the day, a private plastic surgery practice is a business. Some businesses promote or support sketchy behavior.

[@kaia7151]

ngl it’s really nice to hear someone with the same opinion as me talk about this topic. i don’t care what people do with their money at all. however when you talk about cosmetic surgery you can’t just encourage it blindly under the guise of “girl power” when the history behind it is so NOT girl power lmao. a question i’d have for people wanting to get cosmetic surgery is “why do you think that feature is considered beautiful?” because the answer is usually that they’ve been TOLD it’s beautiful or their features aren’t ‘trendy’ right now. idk just some thoughts lol!

[@dictatorshiki]

exactly, "choice" feminism is destroying critical thinking

[@SamaraTrollero]

I had a straight nose in my early twenties, no idea why it's crooked now in my late twenties, would love to get that fixed. I have scarring around my lips from herpes every season, so would like that tattooed, but even these would open the door to plastic surgery obsession

[@jennali9800]

I plan to get cosmetic surgery but I don't believe the feature I want is widely considered beautiful. It's simply how I prefer to express myself.

[@mira-me9oi]

yess exactly and likr people think we live a vacuum or smth as if we don’t live our entire lives being force fed ideals of beauty that only fit a small percentage of people, as if there aren’t billion dollars industries that live off people’s insecurities, that THEY created, and the way all these patriarchal ideas are being repackaged and sold as feminism is disheartening because so many young women are buying into this shit and that’s scary because if feels like we will never move away from this

[@therobotdevil2284]

True! There's also the question of why do you hate said feature that you have. I saw a TikTok of a girl talking about how she used to always hate her nose, until she realized it was her grandpa's nose, and his side of the family's nose type, and it gave her some perspective of how beauty standards of the NOW were causing her to resent the features her family naturally had. Kind of an interesting perspective.

[@rs-mt6kl]

Honestly it's a lot more radical to be ugly and unapologetic about it. I love going to work without makeup on. I love wearing my cute star zit stickers and taking care of my skin even when it's breaking out. I love letting my hair get a little bit greasy because it's good for it. I love being ugly and taking up space and not being sorry about the way I look.

[@romijane]

Also, let's not play pretend and say that these "enhanced" faces look good, because they really don't in most cases when seen in person. They translate well in pictures and whatnot, but seeing people with so much work done on their faces in real life, in motion, is kinda spooky. I don't mean to make fun of them or anything, I just mean to point out that people strive for this IG face that just looks good on IG, but in real life they can't even achieve it. It's the most unrealistic, unachievable thing. Hope it makes sense...

[@nolwazigxawu9797]

It reminds of my first time seeing IG makeup in real life. It didn’t look good at all! Great for the camera and IG but in the light of day?🥴

[@sugarbomb187]

i so agree! it looks terrible in real life, they all look like lumpy inflated balloons

[@XXSQUIDGLEYXX]

I think that's a big difference. Lots of surgery these days are for cameras not real life. I feel like my face is the opposite absolutely horrible in 2D (on camera) but when you see in real life in 3D I look fine. So much of what beauty is has moved to being online. Because a camera takes a 3D image and makes it 2D it does cause change (think a flat map Vs a globe) but we see this change as omg I'm ugly and not just the nature of cameras

[@missawsum4918]

i completely agree. i hate the filler in lips the most, dont get me wrong big lips look great but usually not unnatural ones.

[@aisling8308]

it's the uncanny valley

[@FumerieHilaire]

As a 42yo gay man I can’t tell you how intense the pressure is to get procedures. What you were describing about the ordinary becoming ugly is an intense aspect of gay male culture these days. It’s so common for gay men to have had procedures that in some social situations you actually feel like a freak if you haven’t. Like I’ve often been the only guy in large social gathering with no work done. If you add in the pressure to gave the perfect muscled body and near requirement that you be taking steroids to achieve that on top of being immaculately dressed, coifed and just generally presenting as some kind of ubermensch perfect specimen at all times… well yeah late capitalist consumerism’s repackaging of the white beauty norm really got the gays. It’s intense.

[@vunessuh]

So interesting! Thanks for sharing :)

[@hadiyahmuh385]

Im a dancer and I don’t fully understand how it feels to be a man or gay but I can relate to everyone in my social group having MUlTIPLE surgeries and feeling ostracized and left out for not having it. In the locker room woman casually talk about getting Botox or filler and I’m like 😳 just overhearing the conversation. Even talking to customers they casually talk about how they can tell I’m a newbie because I haven’t got my body done “yet”. Also my dancer friends will unprovoked send me their plastic surgeons Instagram and invite me to go with them 🥴😭.

[@FumerieHilaire]

@@hadiyahmuh385 yeah I have very similar experiences of friends commenting about how I should get my lips done, or get "on cycle" to get more muscular or unsubtly raving about a procedure they have had suggesting basically I should get it too. I'm not even that self conscious. I have a normal amount of hangups about my appearance for a gay guy. And I certainly don't judge anyone for getting work done. I may even get some myself eventually if I actually feel like I need it. But what I won't do is get it just to fit in.

[@FumerieHilaire]

@GAY RIGHTS ARE HUMAN RIGHTS oh there’s aging and there’s aging with the gays though. Like you’re allowed to age but only if you also become hotter, so where being pretty when you were young was considered valuable now you have to transition into some hyper masculine “daddy” archetype with all that entails. So you can age, but only in a very specific way. I know guys who had a lot of work done to their chins and brows to give them heavier more masculinised features, as well as getting filler to increase the overall fullness of the face which matches the super pumped bodies we’re expected to obtain as we get older. Hair transplants are super common too now.

[@moritzwagner4332]

I'm gay too... But I'm still planning on having surgery.

[@dipity98]

This video is so important! The problem with "choice feminism" is that it ignores the societal pressures from patriarchy that inform your choices! You're choosing to get Kim Kardashian's butt? Okay but why?? There's no way you would do that without outside pressure! And anyway, empowerment cannot come from individual pleasure, it comes from collective freedom from patriarchy which in no way relates to relocating body fat to look more like a celeb lol

[@isabeli.9481]

Liberal feminism cant even be considered feminism anymore. "Its important to look pretty 🥰 feeling sexy is so empowering 😍✨" Like women no, stop

[@PraiseJ-Pope]

Honestly yas. Double time yas. If choice feminism would have existed in ancient china, these "feminists" would have claimed "oh footbinding is so empowering, i do this for myself, i chose this etc" I'm almost crying because you are the first ones to talk about this. Any other feminists i found here are all "empowerring yass slay queen make that butt bigger for onlyfans"

[@amdiary7]

Exactly ! I agree 100%

[@sammyranyx6710]

"empowerment cannot come from individual pleasure"... i dont know whybi needed to hear this phrased like that but its really got my head turning

[@user-km7td2zm2p]

Wasn't expecting a radical comment on a video essay

[@clairescare5683]

You touched on one part of plastic surgery that's always bugged me - that the more people get it, the more people who don't get it can stand out and suffer negative consequences for it. I've never been able to see plastic surgery as something that's just for an individual with no other effect, because the more people that decide to do it, the more reinforcement those unrealistic beauty ideals tend to gain. It continues to perpetuate this cycle of making the unrealistic beauty normal and an expected standard, which in turn pushes more people to get it, and so forth. Obviously it is still up to each person at the end of the day. I don't want to get it because I think that if I got one thing done, I'd start seeing all these other procedures I could also get. And eventually I won't look like me anymore.

[@LaurenStarification]

Claire Scare EXACTLY! All the while making us value outer beauty at the cost of developing our inner qualities. YUCK.

[@pollysshore2539]

I personally don’t know anyone that has had full on plastic surgery, and I am 47. I only know a few people that have had cosmetic procedures like filler and the majority are gay men. It might be a completely different ballgame for younger generations but I don’t think we’re in danger of this yet. There’s currently an increasing backlash against fillers so I would expect some changes. I do wish more teens - young women would look at the visible signs of plastic surgery and cosmetic procedures that increase as people age. I have had no work done but I will never say never. I’m getting my first wrinkles that bother me. Just me. No one else has said a word about them. I’m pushing 50. If I were going to start fillers now would be the time. Not at 20. You’re in for a long road if you do that. I seriously doubt I’ll ever have work or procedures done because at the end of the day I don’t give enough of a ….

[@pokelover02]

Yes! I really hope people choose not to do this. It’s not an individual thing that just affects one person. It perpetuates this standard that’s difficult for lower income people to achieve. If everyone starts getting cosmetic surgery, eventually we’ll have this even more dystopian society where the lower class = the ugly class, and they’ll be treated even worse than they are now.

[@9395gb]

I actually stand out for not having it and get complimented on my nautral looks. Then again I used to model back in the day and maintained my looks. To be honest, I don't think plastic surgery looks good and I don't think people who have it think it looks good. It's very noticeable and looks severe.

[@kiseikimoeyorimarui2364]

​@@LaurenStarification, stupid!

[@heyitsa9511]

I think it’s problematic how normalized plastic surgery has become; it’s not normal to surgically change your features purely for “beauty” aesthetics and the procedure shouldn’t be marketed as empowering. It’s worrisome that a lot of people feel the need to go through dangerous procedures to fit the ever-changing beauty standard . Also, it makes me uncomfortable how plastic surgery allows white people to adopt ethnic features that people of color used to get brutally bullied about (e.g. big lips, big butts, etc.). I’m against plastic surgery shaming and think people should do what makes them happy! I just think it’s really sad that society has created the circumstances for people to want cosmetic surgery, and I question if it does actually produce true happiness or if it’s simply a temporary fix. There is a lot of white supremacy, exploitation, and ageism at hand and I just wish that were addressed more in the industry

[@pauneverknows]

Agree! I think instead of shaming people who has had plastic surgery, we all should help them to see that's not the correct way to improve yourself and your self-esteem, there's always a better way!

[@SieMiezekatze]

This it is !!!you just wrote all my problems about plastic surgery I agree entirely

[@itsbaby3300]

I honestly agree with you except... white people have these features too y' know? Its not just colored people, and although its more common among us its still bad to push this stereotype

[@heyitsa9511]

@@itsbaby3300 oh ya for sure! I wanted to include that point but my comment would’ve been too long😭 i just wanted to highlight how white people get praised for having these features while POC, for example black woman, get hated for them. Especially since these were features exaggerated in the Jim Crow era ( the racist caricature specifically made fun of black people’s big lips) . I think the context of these features on white people vs POC is different if that makes sense!

[@itsbaby3300]

@@heyitsa9511 i dont really know tbh, i have no idea how things are in the states but personally i dont think its "white people"s fault for the mistreatment of colored folks, its not anyone's fault to be born light skin into a first world country and i can safely say colored people go through so much worse in 2nd and 3rd world countries, just like pale people and everyone in between

[@rp-wn5or]

In South Korea, “prejuvenation” is a status symbol. Constant massages, facials, and lasers over the years without doing surgical procedures (maybe a the occasional filler/Botox….but very minimal) actually costs more than getting surgery done. In a sense, they view a woman who looks good and hasn’t done any surgical procedures almost of higher value than a woman who looks good with procedures…almost in a weirdly eugenic-y/genetic value sense.

[@eldron29-a54]

In every part of the world there is that eugenics mentality, sadly.

[@rp-wn5or]

@@eldron29-a54 I think some of it stems from a primitive survival of the fittest mentality that used to actually matter but those standards have been twisted and warped…although all of it stems from desirable genetics/reproduction…which makes me wonder if these problems will ever truly go away (I’m guessing they’ll just take different forms as time passes)

[@mariachi3217]

@@rp-wn5or if it’s a way to survive I guess but still should be stopped

[@rp-wn5or]

@@mariachi3217 by survive I mean reproduce aka be sexually desired lol unless sex disappears I don’t think it’ll completely go away

[@babsstrijkert5365]

Ageing 'gracefully' shows personality. Like, how can you hate it when your face shows that you're no stranger to smiling, or thinking, or feeling. But then again maybe the people that feel the need to hide their age aren't too proud of those years.

[@TheKeeroop]

Mina’s research over the topics she talks about never disappoints

[@sezmonsta3229]

It almost sounds anti-feminist to reduce female empowerment to something which is achieved by fitting a beauty standard

[@niamhharikasen7848]

THIS. i'm a feminist but even though i would never, could never force a woman to stop doing what she's doing, i'm incredibly skeptical of the place plastic surgery has in our community as it is definitely not empowering to make yourself look more desirable and fit into beauty standards that oppress women.

[@pokelover02]

I just hope people who realize this choose not to do it

[@gummypoppa]

I was arguing with a friend when I criticized how plastic surgeons are really promoting plastic surgery and how toxic that is and they kept saying how they’re just doing their job and that generally speaking plastic surgery is great for women cause it gives them happiness.

[@whateversup]

Honestly yes. As a korean American, there is huge pressure and normalization around cosmetic surgeries. Obviously don’t generalize and not all korean people get surgeries, but personally, my family really pushed it on me. mainly that my eyes are too slanted and the size of my cheeks too prominent. Which is ironic now that I’m older (30) and these features are very trendy (slanted up eyes and prominent cheek bones). Obviously other communities can have these features but it’s interesting to note the dominant societal beauty ideal (that white people control) is moving to incorporate these features. TLDR: plastic surgery and our beauty ideals are absolutely influenced by fetishism and reveals pressures in beauty in a society

[@alondrag.m.5379]

Honestly I don't know how some women manage to live in places that constantly remind them that they are "not pretty enough". I've seen many videos and read articles about the beauty culture in Korea and, correct me if I'm wrong, it seems exhausting. Of course other places have these ideas too, but it seems that over there it's something common to criticize people's appearances openly, even if with good intentions. I wouldn't be able to survive someplace like that 😬, so draining.

[@NynNahh]

@@alondrag.m.5379 Latina in Korea here. Yes, when I worked in a pub counter I'd constantly get remarks of my appearance. Most of them good, but some harsh ones once I put on some weight. My boss used to ask jokingly why I was fat, and trying to keep the good spirit I said "haha, I'm not fat, I'm pregnant", and this stupid joke went on for a few months until I quit the place for a better job. Not to mention guests, that would ask if I was sick when I didn't have makeup on, or that one guy who urged me to go to a hospital and have my faux freckles microblading removed because 'iT iS UgLyYyyY'. Wellll... can't say my mental health is at its prime.

[@abigailowens4290]

@@NynNahh My non Korean Asian friends always say Koreans are the worst when it comes to enforcing looks especially for women and they are obsessed with fixing and making imperfection

[@NynNahh]

@@abigailowens4290 I can't generalize. I've met some awesome people, and honestly, the people who were most "in" the standards were some of the ones that never made a bad comment about my appearance, or outright had something nice to say (even more, a guy that was quite handsome and fit-oriented wanted to ask me out even when I was quite heavy for my average weight). My current boss is really nice too, never made any comment about my appearance.. and other co-workers too. I believe only the unhappy people are the ones pointing others' flaws and trying to drag them down.

[@alondrag.m.5379]

@@NynNahh That's too harsh of them. Glad you got a better job, and freckles look so beautiful! Nice to know not all are that way, tho I guess you have to be prepared in case you meet one of those unhappy people, maybe an automatic answer to what they say?

[@RandomPerson-bc6td]

Living in a Southeast Asian country where the beauty standards adhere to white features, I've always been insecure about my nose. Having Eurocentric features just automatically made anyone a celebrity here. As young as 5, I already wanted to get a nose job. As I grew older, I realized how bad that was for me. Rather than trying to accept myself, I was only trying to please others. I'm still insecure about my nose, but I've been working hard to accept it. I also thought how sad it would be if I had a child. If my child had the same nose as me and saw what I did to mine, it would be depressing.

[@eline.ps23]

😭💔 same

[@LiquetteDumitrina]

I am eastern european and i am so sory for what other european countrys did.Sometimes when we hear stories like this eastern europeans and balkans feel sad because we have a feeling of responsability.Even tho bulgaria,latvia,poland,romania or macedonia did not colonise anybody when we hear people from other parts of the world say they don't like themselfs because they don't look like us we feel terible.Its a complicated feeling.We know that we did not do any wrong but because we share a continent and look like the people that did so much evil all over the world we have a feeling of responsability.

[@RoxyCherryRozy]

@@LiquetteDumitrina What are you talking about? Asians love for example russian women. Nor did whites colonize Japan or Korea. They had such goals before it. Check their history. Pale skin, small lips etc. 🙄 it's cause they simply like delicate features. They even talk delicately.

[@LiquetteDumitrina]

@@RoxyCherryRozy i don't talk only about koreans or japanese but for example in india and philipines women get treatments to have lighter skin

[@sherlizamegane3850]

The last aspect in your comment is very inspiring.

[@rachelurquhart6686]

My number one advice to everyone but especially teenage girls is to unfollow every single influencer and model you follow, and keep your socials exclusively for pursuit of hobbies and inspiration/education. For some reason as a teenager I was convinced following 'pretty people' would somehow make me prettier too, like proximity to beauty equates to beauty. This goes for channels like Hyram too. Nothing progressive about a man reacting in horror to women who aren't preventing aging correctly..

[@user-bi1jh5ue9l]

Hyram gpt me fd up

[@vanillarose2907]

I actually dont think this is good advice in the long term. There will always be people that are better than you and prettier than you in real life that you will time and time again compare yourself to, because the same holds true to both social media and irl, you dont know the story behind the look or body. It night be a good detox and way to START but at the end of the day what is most important os fixing your mindset. Im not on like instagram or twitter alot but im very active on youtube where i follow many beauty orientated youtubers that usually represent the epitome of beauty standards/aka theyre pretty. Being confident in myself is that they dont make me feel any less than as a human being. If on occasion its definitely not anymore than when i see a pretty person on the street

[@rachelurquhart6686]

​@@vanillarose2907 The reason the vast majority of young women feel insecure isn't because they need to 'fix their mindset' it's because there is a multi-billion industry that profits from their insecurities. Or do you think women are just naturally more self-critical than men. If you want to have a social media feed saturated with images of manufactured beauty its you choice but you don't need to defend an industry that certainly doesn't care about you.

[@vanillarose2907]

@@rachelurquhart6686 whos defending it sis? I just said that is not a long term solution. It is only a way to start

[@AnimeLoverMusic]

@@vanillarose2907 I agree with you. Though I do acknowledge how the influence now in teenage girls is worse than ever. It will always be mixed in with their already existing self-esteem and self-image. I'm almost 26, at 16 I was still in the peak of being very insecure with low self esteem, just from my own upbringing (not the internet). But Instagram wasnt what it was back then; I was just veery into kpop and unwillingly became even more insecure that I already was, learning about South Korea's rigorous beauty standards affected me. Following body positivity content creators (especially on instagram) has helped a lot in my self-acceptance journey, as well as just good coping strategies, positive affirmations, and all those things that therapy teach. At the end I naturally distanced myself from kpop and people that fed on my insecurity, but once I got better on a personal level I can enjoy a bit of everything. I dont mind that my feed has some conventional beautiful people (of any gender) edited for cosplay shoots/aesthetics/lewd, but I also need body positive ones, artistic ones, comics, quotes, other photography, kpop dance videos, and anything else I might enjoy. It really is a complicated and nuanced subject, but again I do acknowledge that living as a teenager in today's world is probably a lot worse, and it shouldn't be.

[@dollyeyeball777]

As a girl who’s always had a big/defined Italian nose and really small breasts, it severely fucked me up hearing about plastic surgery because 99% of it was women either getting their noses done to be smaller or their breasts done to be bigger because that’s what’s seen as “sexy” and “more feminine.” I felt so disgusting and manly for years (and still do, but less frequently) because of this. Everyone wanting the exact opposite of what you have naturally can make you feel like absolute shit, so I’m really glad we’re talking about this more. Cosmetic surgery never has been and never will be empowering and all it does is profit off of women’s insecurities.

[@rahmashaikh7872]

I'm so sorry about that, and honestly I can relate. For the longest time I've seen these cute little curved button noses go mainstream and become what everyone likes, and my nose is like a right triangle sticking out of my face lol. I agree it's not empowering in the slightest, personally I never understood how it could be, I mean, in 20 years what if it's fashionable to have a big nose and small thin lips? That's the thing, it's ever-changing, so I say, embrace what you've got and embrace diversity. It's impossible to fit society's beauty standard forever. (sorry that was a little cheesy)

[@anix670]

Preach! ❤️

[@AA-iy4gm]

In Eastern Europe the anorexic thin body was and still is in even if you smoke and eat junk, as long as you outwardly look thin, the next step is obtaining flashy branded items like purses, shoes etc and the step after that is obtaining a rich husband...it's so shallow but they don't care that they look down on people that don't look like that or don't aspire for that.

[@Patience2dream]

"people can do what they want, but let's not pretend here" is the best way to close this video. Thank you for making this even though you were worried about backlash, I appreciate the bravery it took to talk publicly about this.

[@amyblaine7624]

I just think it so sad how women are taught to fear growing older like the plague. That we start expiring at 25. I mean older women are still STUNNING. There is something so beautiful about acquiring wrinkles. The way I look at it, It means you have had the privilege to age. Some people don’t get to live so long. Don’t we all want to continue growing and evolving? Why are we trying to stop our evolution and keep ourselves frozen as our teenager or 20 something selves? It’s insane.

[@kon2175]

Hopefully it calms down at some point and society learns to appreciate older women. Maybe because there won’t be so many women looking “older” in the future (I think I have no idea), that will be the new beauty standard. Of course I think it will always fluctuate to what we can’t have, but some people are just going to choose to age, and remain without surgery, and those are probably going to benefit from that!

[@boopityboopboop]

Wrinkles indicate you've smiled, you've emoted, you've lived life. That's the thing. Wrinkles aren't a bad thing, in fact, they're some peoples trademark and they wouldn't look the same without them. Same thing with eyebags, or deep set eyes, or chubby cheeks, or cheek lines. That's why it's so sad to see the erasure of natural smile and eyes lines, people are so gorgeous when they are expressive and able to emote and to rob themselves of their ability to do it is like robbing them of their physical signs of humanity. Turns them into lifeless blowup dolls

[@wokk9543]

fax

[@victoriapalos1757]

Can we also talk about the fact that these celeb women “who look great” are also quick to claim they’ve had no surgery? The audacity. The kardashians barely admit it, Ariana grande refuses to admit it, and Jlo too. Like… y’all really think we don’t know?? Haha 😂

[@usagination]

The worst part of it are the fans who are defending them on top.. especially the Ariana fans It's just so toxic

[@Trex40385]

Koreans do this every time...

[@91clarie]

Ariana's are soooo obvious too like her whole face has changed over the years! And even Taylor Swift had work done, she still looks like herself though but if you look closely it's also obvious, she for sure had a boob job and face fillers/lifts

[@jocelyncooper1738]

I find it hilarious when people who’ve obviously had a lot of plastic surgery (Ariana, the Kardashians etc.) refuse to admit to it. It’s like “We have eyes. We see”. It’s insulting the general public’s intelligence at this point.

[@shockofthenew]

I started to get pretty insecure about early signs of ageing in my mid 20s, but the last couple years I've really gone through an emotional transformation about it and stopped caring completely. I work in a super male-dominated industry, so naturally the majority of my 'idols' growing up were men. I sat down one day and took a look at pictures of these men, most of them wrinkled, overweight, balding, and awkward-looking, and thought about how deeply respected and revered they are for what they contribute, create and express. No one would ever question their looks. Their looks aren't even remotely a part of how their value is assessed. I know society won't treat me the same way, as someone who's (roughly) female, but damnit I want that for myself. And I'm never going to get it unless I fully untie my looks from my inner sense of value. I have to fully 'live' that truth if I want it to take hold. I know I won't be treated the same as those men. It's going to be a fight, and some people will unfairly judge me for 'looking my age' or not being 'pretty' enough. But society is never going to change unless more and more of us choose to just go for it anyway and push through. In the end it's strength in numbers. You have to be the change you want to see. I want to become someone who inspires young girls (or enbies or boys!) because of who I am and what I contribute to the world, so they can see someone like them and think "she's so highly respected because of what she does, not because of how she looks. I could be like her." It's a subtle thing really, it's not like I take no interest in how I look - I enjoy expressing myself creatively with clothes, hair, makeup etc. - but I'm specifically not going to make myself look young. I'm not going to cover up my dark circles or dye my grey hairs or spend 30 minutes every night dabbing 7 different ointments carefully into my skin and 30 minutes every morning covering my face with makeup for a 'natural youthful glow'. I'm definitely not getting surgeries or implants or injections to create an uncanny valley version of myself that's more 'acceptable'. I'm going to take all the time and money I could have spent on that stuff over the years and put it into making and doing and helping and laughing and just... living.

[@hazel8014]

Wow that's a great heartwarming comment. :) I once used some app to make myself look older and I realized I looked like my mom. Seeing my aged face after the original photo was surprising, but not ugly. You can be beautiful and valuable even as a old woman. There's beauty in wrinkles, it makes you appreciate that you are here, alive. Your body is always working, changing. Despite knowing this, seeing even a tiny wrinkle is scary to me, because I'm a perfectionist and live in a society that pressures women into unattainable standards. Men can have a beer belly, but a woman must have flat belly even after being pregnant. A scar on a man is badass, but on woman it's ugly. Body hair on man is great, but on woman? So unhygienic and disgusting. So many double standards. Ugh.

[@iamtoxic4663]

you go madam!

[@akhyla9848]

Most underrated comment here.

[@LaurenStarification]

Shockofthenew. YES!!!! SO much good energy and life flowing through your comment......I join you in focusing on my abilities and my inner experience of balance and curiosity about the world. not EVERYONE judges others on their looks.....let's stick together and put our energy into what is important and helpful in life....sounds rich and satisfying!

[@Ankara_ratgirl]

PUT TRUTH INTO WORDS!!

[@yay-cat]

Personally I cringe at the term "mommy makeover". Like there's so much pressure on women to look the same after having a baby as they did before but like its a traumatic experience for your body. Like I think it involves a "tummy tuck" and a "boob lift" and maybe some other stuff like liposuction but it's major surgery with a heavy recovery period. WHY do they give it such nauseatingly cutesy infantalising / patronizing names. As though someone who's given birth to a kid or three and is willing to suffer through the surgery, recovery, and financial implications (while presumably doing parent duties), might not be able to deal with the scientific name.

[@aspannas]

It's honestly disgusting, the fact that society shames women's bodies who went through pregnancy is so fucked up. Like your body went through so much during the pregnancy, birth and after, only to get shamed for how your body looks, when it should be celebrated - your body did all of that.

[@funnyvalentinesglorioushai2227]

I mean the shaming was also there before the mommy make over existed. The plastic surgery is the solution for the problem society made. In the past women were shamed when their bodies weren't as small and "beautiful" as they were before pregnancy. I don't believe people should be shamed if they don't confirm to the beauty standard or if they are not conventionally atractive (this two are not the same), on the other hand is difficult to not pick on how some people get praised by certain features and you don't or in the case if pregnancy, how you used to be praised and now you are not

[@Lalala-nh7ej]

This! I saw that a family channel called the Ace family posted a video of the mom getting a “mommy makeover”, and it honestly disgusts me because 90% of their fanbase are little kids. Kids are incredibly gullible and easily influenced, and on top of that she tried to promote it as a part of her “spiritual journey”

[@jenniferclemons4766]

My husband's boss's wife had one. It's just a tummy tuck and breast lift.

[@Shaderzgamer]

it's so hard to see people fool themselves into thinking that their choice of plastic surgery is utterly their own, and not at all affected by outside influences and strict perceptions of beauty in this society..like once you see that it really is impossible to unsee it. and it really can apply to the beauty industry as a whole, makeup and fashion ect

[@maria_____.]

Unfortunately all of our insecurities are caused by different societal standards. It's so sad to think that making people feel like shit about themselves is a billion dollar industry.

[@emmettvictor]

I’ve only found out as an adult that I’m autistic and I’m just coming to terms with how much sensory distress I’m under on the daily. Anyway, I started only wearing clothes that are comfortable and a nice sensory experience. Those are my top priorities above style, and damn it’s been so freeing

[@jennali9800]

Just because it is affected by outside forces does not mean it is not your own. My language and culture come from society, and they are still a part of me. You can't extricate your identity from the environment you live in. And besides, not everybody gets cosmetic surgery to conform to beauty standards. I certainly am not.

[@jaquelineburnett7836]

The same people that say "plastic surgery is empowering for women" are the same people that say "the porn industry is empowering for women" Neither are empowering for women. Only creating a false sense of security and a new set of shackles.

[@Author.Noelle.Alexandria]

Spoken like someone who made different decisions and can’t understand why anyone would decide differently. First, if you ever wear makeup or try to dress and look nice, you are finding some sense of empowerment in your looks. If cosmetic procedures were the cost of a tube of lipstick, no one would complain. Second, not everyone who gets plastic procedures does so for others. My body was ravaged by years of major surgeries, and I ended up having “cosmetic” work done. Yes, quotes. In helping undo some of the severe scarring, excess skin (one medication made me gain hundreds of pounds that I lost), and general rebalancing, I reclaimed my body from an illness and this boosted my mental health and confidence. Anyone who thinks they have a right to tell me shit like “you should love your body for your battle scars” deserves to go through medical hell and be disfigured because everyone deserves what they think isn’t a big deal. If you get offended by that, it’s because you know it IS a big deal. We can’t accept makeup, hair dye, piercings, and tattoos as empowering if we’re going to shame other body mods. The dividing line tends to be cost. If not everyone can reasonably afford it in a few months, we act like no one should do a thing. We should shame society putting pressure on people in any way, not people who decide for themselves what they want to do with their bodies. Body-shaming people for getting work done is still body-shaming, and it results in people who have a feature naturally being accused of lying and being shamed, and it sends the message to impressionable young people that there still is a look they need to aim for, and that look is whatever isn’t trendy.

[@Author.Noelle.Alexandria]

And when it comes to anything porn, why don’t you just say it-you think women need to be chaste little good girls instead of taking charge of our own sexuality. I’ve found OnlyFans and such to be very liberating. My husband and our daughter know I do it and they support women doing what we want with our own bodies since marriage and motherhood don’t mean not owning out own bodies anymore. You are literally trying to oppress me by trying to shame me for making a decision about my body that you don’t agree with. Next thing I know, you’ll come out as anti-choice or something.

[@coldhands1892]

no it's not the same thing...porn industry is problematic but taking charge of your own sexuality can definitely be liberating for women🤨

[@katie8325]

No it’s not the same thing. At all. Maybe open a book.

[@carmensandiego5386]

Yikes 😬 intersectional feminism maybe you should read about it!

[@ellendallanora7404]

One of the experiences I had that made me question my entire definition of "beautiful" happened, in fact, just a few months ago. My mom and I were running errands, and she introduced me to an acquaintance of hers on the way back home. We chatted for a bit and said our goodbyes before getting back to our path. I distinctly remember mom telling me about this lady's difficult life as a single mother who had to raise the son of an already married man who did not want to make compromises. Mom concluded with a phrasing somewhat akin to "Well, at least her son didn't get her looks" and I was surprised. I told mom I didn't think she was ugly, and mom was quite bewildered. "Well, at least someone thinks she looks fine." I don't know what is worse: the fact that I was likely the only one in the town who thought she looked okay, or that the things that made her " ugly" were ethnic features traditionally associated with mixed-race people, African-Americans, and south-American autochthonous backgrounds. Oh, and apparently my country invented the BBL. Sorry about that buddy.

[@tiarezavaleta8850]

Had a similar conversation with a friend a while back. She was talking about her classemate, a girl, who was dating a European white man. My friend insisted about how her classemate was too ugly for her boyfriend. Later I saw the couple's pictures and I find nothing strange. My friend's clasemate was a cute and beautiful afro-descendant girl, almost too cute for her boyfriend (at least from my POV). Being Mexican it makes me sad how prevalent is racism in Latin America and how little we confront the issue.

[@ellendallanora7404]

@@tiarezavaleta8850 honestly, I 100% agree with you. This type of stuff runs deep, and there's just so much work to do. I don't even know where to even begin.

[@franz3810]

@@tiarezavaleta8850 as a Latin American, I confirm

[@frankly9432]

This is really sad

[@emmanuttela4308]

If you notice it, everyone talks about the before and after of cosmetic surgery but you almost never see the in between, the healing, the pain, the bruising, the complications. As I read somewhere, "Imagine if all people felt good in their skin and confident, how many businesses would go bunkrupt"

[@Garbonzobat]

How society treats aging women is a topic of further discussion. In some traditional family structures and communities, elderly women had a role in helping raise kids, community engagement, and passing down wisdom. How does that play out in our modern society? Where suburbia severely restricts the mobility of those who can’t drive, birth rates are decreasing, and communities fragment. What can elderly women do now? It’s no surprise that there is such a fear of aging when the current age lacks a role for the elderly.

[@_swesters_]

My great grandmother lost her license a couple years ago and sold her car because she could no longer remember street names and where to go. From that point she's become severely depressed. Sometimes I think that if the family didn't come in every day to give her medication and fix her food, then she would've killed herself. She's over 90 now and she's on a palliative care routine, her medication will slowly be taken out until her body gives in naturally. It's what she wants, but I can't help but feel sad. I feel like there should've been more for her. She was active in the community for a very long time, but now it's just too much for her. She used to be a musician but her hands became so malformed from the process of aging that she had to give up the one thing that she loved the most. It's no wonder people are afraid to grow old.

[@HeyyyitsBell]

So so true, I think you hit the nail on the head.

[@HeyyyitsBell]

@@_swesters_ Growing old scares me, and it’s for the practical reasons like losing mobility, the possibility of losing myself in mental disease, dying without purpose. Some of these comments say growing old is beautiful or somehow a positive, but I find it so hard to see it that way. I wonder if one can grow old happily in today’s age. Thank you for sharing your grandma’s story, reading people’s life stories is my favorite thing about youtube comments

[@_swesters_]

@@HeyyyitsBell Growing old is a scary thought but most people who are really afraid of it are the people who have the most time ahead of them. When we all get to the point where age takes it's toll, we've had long eventful lives. At that point all we can do is accept it. I would say that it's similar to being terminally ill, you don't spend every day thinking of death, you spend every day thinking of life. At the end of the day, even when our bodies fight us, humanity makes ways to live and to love. I would say it's not so scary as it's made out to be. My great grandmother still smiles, and she is surrounded by people who love her, her walls are decorated with photos of her family and her accomplishments over her long life. I would say that's a fine way to go. I think in the end she feels happy that she got to experience all that she did, and I'm glad you enjoyed her story.

[@thepinkestpigglet7529]

Suburbia fertilizes so many problems we need to ban that kinda zoning

[@Chinky111987]

As a black woman who always had junk in the trunk and big lips; I really feel so insulted that now things that I felt were ‘different’ about me as a kid (I went to a predominantly white school at the time) (luckily I came from a household where I was told I’m beautiful often and high self esteem implemented into us so I grew out of that quickly, especially when I left that school) is now seen as the global standard courtesy of the kardashians who don’t even have these features naturally. It was never a issue in our own community, but other ppl made us feel like these features were less than . Now that these features are praised it’s still someone who doesn’t look like us. It’s insanity. We still have girls with these features who are looked at as overweight cause they don’t have the money or don’t want to get lipo to go along with it (again, not by our communities but by others) Overall, I definitely agree with you. I’m so thankful for the high self esteem that was instilled in me since childhood because I never look at these altered faces and bodies and think ‘that’s what I want’. I love how I look and how my face and body is mine only. I wish all schools had a class where they focused heavily on self esteem and loving yourself. A lot of ppl’s critiques on themselves stems from deeper issues (though that’s not always the case). I wish every child got the pep talks I did as a kid. I give them to my son and niece almost daily. I always let them know how beautiful and smart they are.

[@bellaharrison6202]

You sound beautiful from the way you describe yourself x

[@thepinkestpigglet7529]

Respect to your family for making sure you know you're beautiful!

[@iamapieceofcandy]

I relate to this so much

[@belenlg5978]

yeah it always pisses me off when people compliment some of my ethnic features now, because when I was little I was bullied precisely because of them. All my childhood getting shit for being darker skinned in a white school, dieting because having a bigger butt and thighs, seeing myself disproportionate for having a small waist and big hips. I caved and had surgery to have thin legs and butt, and now everyone wants a big butt and tanned skin. It is so stupid! you were lucky to have a supporting family, mine didnt in this aspect and it really f'd me up

[@abeautifulcountry9353]

I am 50 and I remember feeling old at 19, 21 and especially when I reached 25. After that, you realise that age is relative. I now look at 30 year olds as so young now (in a good way, not patronising) in that you have your whole lie ahead of you. Your face changes as you get older but just look after yourself and stop worrying. The biggest advice I'd give any young person is if they're worried about being single etc. don't be, those years of freedom are such a gift 😊

[@exp-io853]

Thanks for the reminder. Idk why being 15 had made me so sad because I missed those 2 years doing nothing and having no friends at all but honestly i guess it was a break for me. Once i step out I cant do everything freely. 15 is a young age I shouldnt be pressured by what I see online. I take my time off social media and its been the best decisions ever. I feel so free. If i age then i age cuz thats how its supposed to be

[@abeautifulcountry9353]

@@exp-io853 You're absolutely right. It sounds like you have a lot more figured out than I did even in my mid-twenties. Like you said, just be true to yourself and the funny thing is that vibe makes people respect and like you more. Also, throughout life you might find periods of time that you might withdraw and not want to be out in the world so much. This isn't a waste at all, it is valuable time for yourself. Like the seasons, everything goes in cycles.

[@janine7384]

I only experienced this on a very minor level, but when I would go to the orthodontist for a Invisalign consult, I was told on multiple occasions "you'd be such a knockout with straight teeth." It was so manipulative and made me feel awful about myself. No plastic surgeon should be commenting on a patient's look beyond what they have been asked about for that specific procedure. It's upselling a medical procedure and it's wrong. Also thanks for commenting on how we applaud "woke" people for being beautiful as they age. I refuse to call even people I don't like ugly or comment on their appearance. Any so-called feminist that calls Marjorie Taylor Green a cavewoman should be ashamed of themselves.

[@Siphyr]

Yeah...when I was being told about why I should get braces, the person literally said "you'll regret not getting your teeth straightening when you get older, because they'll look bad and it's harder to get your teeth fixed when you're older", since I said I didn't really care about how my teeth looked. I find it frustrating that I'm expected to view my appearance in such a methodical way, like I can't care about how I look and like my appearance without fulfilling a standard set by other people.

[@chloebaumstark7992]

Yes! I had a really similar experience with my orthodontist. It felt so weird hearing ideas for how to address the legit medical reasons my dentist sent me there mixed in with ideas addressing purely cosmetic issues. I had anticipated a little of this going in but I was surprised with myself by how hard it was to say no when presented with the opportunity to achieve "the perfect smile."

[@Aya-tt2up]

omg same here the orthodontist wouldn't leave me alone saying that i'd look so much better with straight teeth and i asked him if on the long run not getting braces would lead to some issues (apart from the aesthetic side) and he said that there weren't any but was forcing me sm to get them sm. i told him i didn't see a problem with my teeth and liked them and he goes "well i see a problem and you'd look sm better". i was pissed and so uncomfortable...

[@lz738]

That's literally disgusting that the orthodontist would say that to you. He should be sanctioned. So inappropriate!

[@melbapeach162]

Wonky teeth are really cute anyway 😤 but that opinion won't make anyone rich I guess .

[@meghn47]

as much as it sucks to say (especially as a woman who has been through some very low lows when it comes to body image), I think there is also an element of individual accountability in the recent normalization of plastic surgery. we are all victims of a patriarchal society, but unfortunately changing the societal perception of beauty relies on a lot of individuals being able to live with their natural bodies. there's nothing productive about shaming people who have already had a procedure, but blindly believing that anything that makes a woman more confident is inherently empowering is misguided, especially when mostly men profit off of that decision.

[@KM-bn7dg]

Very well put

[@zoehuwi4586]

💯

[@wonderfulkitty]

Not all plastic surgery is patriarchal and shaming women for not taking « individual accountability » for what they do with their own bodies is severely misled. What if your trans and want surgery? Or what if you have a feature that’s severely debilitating? For certain people, plastic surgery can be life-saving. Besides, the concept of beauty will always be exclusive regardless of whether of what people do. If everyone’s beautiful, then no one is. This fact has existed before plastic surgery was a thing.

[@benita8856]

@@wonderfulkitty I'm pretty sure they're talking about cosmetic and not reconstructive surgery so it comment doesn't really fit

[@wonderfulkitty]

@@benita8856 I’m talking about both, love. And my comment is highly relevant. Whether or not you agree is a different issue entirely

[@ArtichokeHunter]

Personally, my relationship to my appearance is complicated, but I think there's something pretty empowering about being "normal ugly" in a world that tells you to hide it in any way you can. Sometimes, going in public just with my face feels like a revolutionary act (especially pre-pandemic) and like people seeing me would kinda have to remember that choosing to perform the level of beauty that most women do in public is optional.

[@galaxymoon8071]

Wow. Thank you for making this comment, it actually made me feel better about my appearance. Whenever I look in the mirror and see someone I think is ugly I know I’ll think of this. I know I don’t fit the beauty standards of today, so people telling me that I’m not ugly has never made me feel better about myself. I would have loved to hear this when I was younger.

[@LixiaWinter]

"Normal ugly" is how I describe myself from now on

[@Jasmine-tr1zs]

I love this comment, it's so true and it feels kinda sad in a way that it does feel revolutionary. I also have many friends who are conventionally beautiful (I am not) but even they don't feel like they can go out in public without doing all the the "optional" things and it makes me feel even worse about myself lol. Here's to us "normal ugly" humans owning it!!!

[@ArtichokeHunter]

@@galaxymoon8071 I love that so much, you're making me emotional. It's definitely an ongoing journey for me with my appearance, but I very much agree with how it's not reassuring to have people tell you you're not ugly. What I want to see isn't "everyone is beautiful," it's that your appearance doesn't define your worth or who you are.

[@scarymonsterzz]

This is why I much prefer the idea of “body neutrality” over “body positivity.” Bodies aren’t “good” or “bad.” They’re a vehicle for us to get around and do things.

[@damageddoughnut]

So my mom is from Southeast Asia, and she flew to Thailand to remove her hanging skin rolls on her stomach from her pregnancies/c-sections and some jaw fat… the plastic surgeon convinced her to add in a boob job and a double eyelid surgery since she was going under the knife anyway. It was her choice in the end but I’m sad she did that. I miss her original eyes and I couldn’t really recognize her. It took her a longer than expected to heal too. It was a hard time for her She also says stuff like“my eyes are bigger, now I look like you” or “people don’t think I’m Asian anymore, they think I’m mixed!” as if she won something in life… note: I am half white. Idk how to describe how I felt when she said that but it was definitely not a good feeling… and it reveals a lot about how beauty ideals revolve around white features 🤦🏽‍♀️

[@nini-qc1qd]

weirdly enough, white celebs try to look Asian. Ariana Grande looks full on Asian now, you can find 10 different versions of her in Cambodia and Japan. You'll find a Kim Kardashian in every 2nd Indian house. Kylie Jenner looks so arab that someone made a parody of this on youtube lol, they put her in an Arabian hair oil ad. My uncle who's white said that if he was asked to guess their race, he would not be able to guess that they're all white

[@rahmashaikh7872]

@@nini-qc1qd While in general I agree totally with your comment, Kim Kardashian is actually a good chunk Armenian. The others cannot be justified in the slightest though

[@nini-qc1qd]

@@rahmashaikh7872 oh rlly? I didn't know that! Kim makes sense the, thank you for telling me!

[@rahmashaikh7872]

@@nini-qc1qd Yeah no problem :)

[@notalexandra]

I also didn’t recognize Renee Zellweger after her eyelid surgery. She looks so different.

[@LorryHill]

Good video. I appreciate that you actually took so much time to learn and research the topic.

[@the.artist72263]

Lorry!!!

[@Vivienwestphal]

Hi, Lorry! 👋 So nice to see you in the comments! I've watched probably all your videos by now 😅

[@simrandas9027]

Omggggg! I love your videos

[@Zoebrownings]

Hi lorry 👋🏾👋🏾👋🏾

[@sweetstorm7652]

Lorry 🤗

[@sallys.2707]

I think it's interesting to see how "beauty standard" change from country to country even in the western world. In France, the "Kardashian's feature" and heavy makeup is still frown upon by many people. It's seen as trashy, a show of poor taste, associated with non-educated Mediterranean girls who don't know how to behave properly. Those stereotypes are rooted in misogyny, clacism and racism. I think it would be interesting to do a study about plastic surgery in Europeans country to see what patients want and what they imagined being the "perfect beauty".

[@autumnatic]

Well, it sounds like the stereotype is spot on in that case if they think the Kardashians look "trashy, a show of poor taste, ... girls who don't know how to behave properly"

[@hlnb.6966]

It’s even more vicious than that: the French (often the white middle/upper-class) who criticize the Anglo-Saxon "full surgery" model as being too much have the same oppressive beauty standards in their heads as the others, except that it has to be « natural ». You still have to get full lips, a round ass and be tanned like the hypersexualised porn actress traits everybody seems to look up to worldwide, but not too much because you can't look like you've been under the knife, it’s like you’ve been born with it.

[@HJWNat]

Yes for example in East Asia, the Kardashian body is criticized to be 'overweight' and are frowned upon. The thin kpop idol figure is what a lot prefer.

[@SuperJosser]

I think I'm happy that i live in Denmark. Obviously we still have plastic surgery here but it seems super rare, especially in young people, compared to other places. In the past few years, young girls have even made it a trend to barely wear any makeup. They wear baggy clothes and show up to fancy parties in sneakers and a t-shirt. I wish I had grown up in this casual period, bc when i was a teenager there was so much pressure on everyone to wear a lot of makeup

[@klausibou1172]

Hi! as a mediterranean woman who lives in France since 2010 I have never heard about this stereotype of us southern european women being non-educated or not knowing how to behave. I agree with you on the « Kardashian look » being frowned upon, but I wouldn’t associate it with a nacionality or an ethnicity. I think maybe cosmetic surgery is less common in the EU than in the US, or maybe less talked about in public.

[@lowercasesncapitals795]

I had two reconstructive surgeries on my face after a cancerous tumor left a big hole in and under my nose. I’m very privileged to have had access to an amazing surgeon, and to now be able to pay for lip filler, which I get on one side of my upper lip to help restore some symmetry. I was totally shocked the 1st time I went in for the lip filler when the nurse suggested I also get several other procedures to “correct” some of my “issues.” I had just had my face rearranged by a tumor and was honestly just hoping to be able to walk past a mirror without having to think about that difficult time in my life. After communicating this to the nurse, she still had the audacity to attempt a sales pitch at the expense of potentially creating new insecurities for me. Thankfully I was 30 at the time, and thus more sure of my value and self, but I shudder to think how this would affect a younger girl, let alone someone with BDD or similar mental health issues :(

[@AngelFace1991]

I feel like people have this unrealistic sense of how people age to begin with. People at work think I'm 23/24, but when I tell them I'm 30 they get noticeably shocked and its like do people think once you hit 30 you become a mummy?

[@hello_robot]

I've been critical of plastic surgery as your local killjoy feminist for years. But something recent really put plastic surgery in drastic new light for me. I recently had an emergency appendectomy. Yes, how dramatic. But even a low-risk, routine surgery like an appendectomy (done via laparoscopy, which is as minimally invasive as you can get for surgery) was killer to recover from. First of all, there are all the obvious elevated risks of being under general anesthesia and the surgical procedure itself. But there's so much to surgery than what we normally think of. My scars hurt for weeks after. I had to be mostly bed bound for 5-6 days. Take time off from work for recovery. The general anesthesia made me nauseous and fatigued. My throat hurt and I had a deep chest cough from the oxygen tube. I did some light yoga 6 weeks after, and it made my surgery scar flare up. My scars are still there, and will most likely be there for years to come. THE POINT being that: all this for a minor surgery that I had no choice in. I can't imagine what kind of fresh hell recovery for plastic surgery must be like, especially since we see celebrities and influencers promoting multiple surgeries at once. And the multiple risks involved in going under. Risks of infections, risks of cardiac arrest, etc. Still astounds me that plastic surgery is sold to women as "empowering"; meanwhile the surgeons walk away making millions off women's suffering.

[@넌지금잘하고있어-k4n]

Exactly! I've only ever had a tonsillectomy and wisdom teeth extraction surgery, but I'm still recovering and getting used to the new inhibitors after my last one a few months ago. And during this time, you'll see a single video or set of photos of someone post-op and that's it - the content is old and boring now. Whilst in the scheme of things, these people are pretty much immobile and unable to perform simple functions for a whole week to the rest of the month. Plus, special medications and a restricted diet leave people drowsy whilst trying to recover, but you'll never hear that from them if it isn't "sob story" enough. You can't shower properly because you need to keep your skin covered? Oh no! You poor darling :'(

[@Terri_MacKay]

YES!! Too many celebrities talk about cosmetic surgery as a minor procedure and not a major surgery. And as with every surgery, there are risks...from the anaesthesia, from blood clots, from the surgery itself, from infection, etc...that they seem to just gloss over. They will talk about "just having a little work done", and have their surgeries at clinics that are more akin to luxury hotels than hospitals. And, of course (with few exceptions), we only see before and after photos...after photos in which they're wearing make-up, and they've been photoshopped. The problem is that way too many young women want to look like these celebrities. Of course, they can't afford the surgeons and clinics that celebrities use, so they go to a sketchy clinic in another country, go to less experienced/talented surgeons, and even have people with no medical training whatsoever give them fillers and Botox. And we've all seen the pictures of the poor women who have been injected with motor oil, concrete, caulking, and other things that don't belong in bodies. ANY surgery (major or minor), including Botox and fillers, comes with major risks, even when performed by skilled surgeons. Why would anyone put their life in the hands of someone they found on the internet just to look like a celebrity or some influencer on Instagram?? It's insane!!

[@Sarah-eh7bw]

The stories about BBL surgery recovery are honestly harrowing, horror movie stuff. No thanks. I’m good lol

[@monkiram]

A huge part of this that's often overlooked is that trends are, by definition, transient and will change. If faces and bodies are "trends" now, then people who get a plastic surgery to change a part of their body now will have an "outdated" face or body later down the line. Will they keep getting different surgeries to update their look with the trends?

[@angelmoldez3512]

yeah same thoughts

[@liyre4189]

I think there are some procedures that will forever be the standard of beauty, but yeah there will definitely be so many people who regret the BBLs, fox-eyes and oversized lip fillers.

[@sin3358]

Yeah that also sorta scares me. I say I love myself as I am but I'm aware that sometimes I look in the mirror and put the beauty standards on it and get insecure. Other days I feel better cause I realize my body is actually quite pretty so I don't mind it or even love it. Idk how I'll have to deal all over again with the change of these standards everytime. I hope by then I'll learn to view them as hella stupid and not let them get to my head

[@lusine4169]

@@sin3358 When you get older you realize it's all bullshit and rigged against you from the start. It's kind of sad actually, true empowerment is bittersweet because by then we wish we'd known the things we now know when we were younger.

[@notalexandra]

Right? Like folks that got permanent makeup in the 90s based on those trends end up unintentionally looking like an artifact of that time.

[@corneliastreets]

Jamie Lee Curtis saying plastic surgery is wiping out generations of beauty is so important because it's the truth. I don't at all shame people who get things done, because insecurity and confidence are such big factors in them and it's different for everyone. However, a lot of people who've gotten things done are prominently swayed by social media and the Instagram/Tiktok beauty standards making people feel insecure over things they never really did before. People begin to look the same striving to fit these standards, which is saddening because oftentimes it's the "unconventional" parts of ourselves that set us apart and make one look more striking. Audrey Hepburn was insecure about her nose, but it was one of the features that made her spark in other people's eyes.

[@TehMomo_]

I saw Jennifer Grey and Meg Ryan's new faces...they lost what really made them "beautiful"

[@corneliastreets]

@@TehMomo_ Such unique beauties. Sadly, they were affected by not only society’s beauty standards and Hollywood pressure, but now also ageism. I wish women wouldn’t be put under such pressure to remain “youthful” while men in Hollywood can look their age.

[@TheCoyoteOutlaw]

There is beauty in aging. When I was 15, I was terrified of looking 30. I'm about to be 32 and I think I am at my most attractive, which is saying something for someone who made a list of all the things I'd change when I was 15. I have a partner who is getting gray hair and it's absolutely beautiful. I hope my hair is as lovely as theirs. We have an uncomfortable obsession with youth in our society and I would very much like for it to change. I don't expect society to adore aging but accepting it is the least I want. It'll make all of our lives better in the long run.

[@Abishhhhh]

its still about you being most attractive lol not helpful but ok

[@TheCoyoteOutlaw]

@@Abishhhhh That's what you got from my comment?

[@TheCoyoteOutlaw]

@@Abishhhhh How is anything I said about being more attractive?

[@sotozka]

i had a nose job in 2018 for a couple of reasons: i had a deviated septum and couldn't breathe, which is fixable through just a septoplasty, which doesn't change the appearance of your nose. however, i was also uncomfortable with the appearance of my nose as i felt i had a similar face to my abusive mother, so i decided to go for a rhinoseptoplasty and kill two birds with one stone. i love my new nose, and i love being able to breathe through my nose, but i'm saying this because now i've fixed one "problem" it becomes a lot easier to scrutinise the rest of my face and find more "problems" that need fixing, with money i don't have. oh, my chin/jaw is asymmetrical, there's a procedure for that. i have drooping eyelids, i could get surgery to fix that. cosmetic surgery 100% plays on women's insecurities and is so entrenched in racism and white european beauty standards, and i despise the idea that it's empowering or feminist. we shouldn't have to be beautiful (or whatever society has decided is beautiful at the moment), it's enough to just be.

[@lunarose7639]

I have to agree with you. While I hate that so many women feel as though they need to change their noses, I'm glad we have the option to. I broke my nose when I was a child and needed reconstructive surgery on it at 16 because I couldn't breathe. it didn't change the appearnce drastically, just the septum which was very crooked. I felt so confident after the surgery and am really grateful I had the option.

[@araline2905]

@@lunarose7639 I do think if it's tied to some medical problem or if it's the result of a horrid accident, then it's okay to get plastic surgery. Getting surgery on your broken nose does involve plastic surgery, yes, but getting it done under those circumstances is better than the alternative of not doing it at all.

[@nihalnihal9356]

THANK. YOU. SO. MUCH. It is honestly the first time I can relate to someone saying that they didn't want to look like their mother. I see mine as a monster, and refuse anything that makes me similar to her. It is my biggest biggest biggest fear and insecurity to ever be told I was similar to her.

[@sillyturtleenjoyer1903]

Beauty standards are so often contradictory. If a person of colour has a certain ethnic feature, it is ridiculed; but when a white person copies said feature through surgical means, its the new standard. The beauty industry thrives off white supremacy, it's not a surprise that cosmetic surgery follows closely beside. Despite me being a white person it took me a long time to overcome that self hate that came with the beauty standard. I can't imagine how much worse it would be for someone of colour. I'm not vehemently against cosmetic surgery, but I would say it's important to examine why you're getting these procedures done. The beauty standard is always changing, so will the change even be worth it down the line?

[@merrymermaid]

agree 100% and hi, we have similar names :)

[@charlotteodonnell8175]

The slim thick influencer body (also inspired by the Kardashian body) is something that comes to mind with contradictions too. Like the (often black) video vixens of 2000s were 'slim thick' but still had a little softness around the tummy and had butts that were either genetically possible or could be exaggerated with exercise but once again, were realistic. Unfortunately these women were often bullied for their looks or hyper sexualised because the Kate Moss look was still in. The influencer body with a flat, flat tiny waist, massive bubble butt, and thigh gap are near impossible to get without surgery but then you have all these influencers are saying "Oh I just diet really carefully. I've been doing a lot of squats and glue bridges.' It's sad because when I was younger, I assumed I was working out wrong or eating the wrong things and I know other people were in the same boat.

[@dlalalabu5956]

I think only surgeries that could make someone actually happy is the changes you do in your face such as nose job or getting your teeth fixed. I honestly think these 2 surgeries are only ones which has nothing to do with sexism. As a women who dont/cant wear a bra at the age of 19 i thought about a boobjob then i researched the process and learned you have to change the implant every 10 years and if you takr them out after a long time your skin will be so saggy that you'll have to get an another surgery to fix that saggy skin (not talking about saggy boobs im literally talking about skin sagging in an extreme way) then i got so mad that these parts of plastic surgery never talked about and everyone tries to hype it with the empowerment bs while it just only continues the pressure on women. At least i've never seen someone who says its empoweting to get a surgery as a hetero man

[@malma2377]

Not always true. I am a white person and I have a huge nose (I am a woman), and I have been made fun of and bullied my entire life. I also had antisemitic insults thrown at me, and I am not even Jewish.

[@malma2377]

@@dlalalabu5956 a nose job has everything to do with sexism. When a man has a crooked nose, it is hot. When a woman has the same nose, it is ugly and unfeminine.

[@graetrinity1724]

A friend of mine said something “you cannot beautify yourself out of oppression” Cause at the end golf the day you are still contributing to these ideals, and there are other people in your community who try as they might will never be able to fit into these beauty ideals. Also as someone who’s been super insecure since my earliest memories, a reason I’d never get cosmetic procedures is because I want children like me to see happy adults that look like them.

[@graetrinity1724]

Also I don’t know if my friend was repeating something else he’d heard, but I heard it from them first

[@Nacanaca12]

I was bullied for my appearance in middle school until 8th grade. That was when thick brows came into style. Everyone began to ask me where I got my brows done. I didn't! I was simply rolling out of bed and not yet allowed to wear makeup. This odd experience led me to be wary of the transient nature of beauty trends. Growing up, I knew of women who plucked their brows and had false ones tattooed on to match a style! What did they do after it fell out of favor? In a decade, what you hate about yourself might be lauded and what you love disdained. How you react to that is up to you.

[@dawert2667]

This happened with freckles too ahahahah i always hated how dirty they made my face look, and envied people with clear complexions. I see people paint them on now and still feel a bit of resent knowing that at the end of the day they can just wipe them off and have a clear face again

[@Abishhhhh]

same i got called freckle face in a bad way and now everyone curates these perfect freckles lol . i understand why people are annoyed by this. Humans are such sheep, its pathetic

[@jennifercheck9468]

nothing about plastic surgery is inherently feminist. no one should be shamed for having it, but that doesn't mean we should try to paint everything women do as feminist. plastic surgery is like getting a tattoo, something that you have to think about and make sure you want to get as it can permanently affect your body. it has nothing to do with feminism, and trying to make it about women as a whole dehumanizes women, and removes our personal agency over our bodies.

[@Alice-jq6rd]

i see your argument, but as Mina said, when it's 92% women who are getting these procedures done, there is definitely a gendered aspect to it. tattoos do not have the same link to beauty standards even though they change one's physical appearance. you wouldn't say that Jennifer Check took laxatives to stay skinny as "personal agency" over her body... that's called an eating disorder as a result of toxic beauty standards

[@samf.s8786]

It's hilarious that women are pushed to normalize getting it and even calling it feminism. Even when having near perfect features, they're encouraged to think "they can make it better". Meanwhile, men are encouraged to prefer dying over getting it. Even when they have notably distinguishable "society deemed ugly" features, which can actually hinder the possibility of them getting employment and a partner.

[@AquaMarino]

Its not like tattoos at all.

[@tinycindy2977]

@@samf.s8786 for real! I always get confused when men complain about how women want "Alpha" males that are hot, rich blah blah like dude, if you are employed and you earn enough to get some plastic surgery done why don't you just do it and become "Alpha"? Women do it all the time

[@ham-sley1308]

Yeah i agree. I have 0 problem with plastic surgery or any body modifications. I honestly think getting plastic surgery or becoming physically prettier in any way isn't empowering or dehumanizing, bc it really dies neither. I think they are just neutral. But if a person likes modifying their body, then I think it is good to support their decision bc it makes them happy. However, if u do decide to modify ur body, it is only good to do it in a safe way

[@sabriohm5088]

If it's so empowering, why do people lie about getting things done?

[@shanicek5188]

Bc they want to pretend like they were born with these unattainable physical features :/

[@Charlene_____]

Because they don’t want to be shamed and guilted for it. Not sure you’ve noticed, but people have very strong opinions.

[@olivia-hc7ut]

because they’re embarrassed and ashamed of what they looked like before and feel judged

[@kiwikiwi1589]

because people judge everyone that gets work done and makes fun of what they looked like before

[@MeHoyMinoy-cv3ps]

Maybe it’s better for them to lie so it’s not normalised to impressionable people. Keep the stigma may actually be more beneficial.

[@Soapynah]

The fact that I get treated A LOT nicer when I wear makeup vs. when I’m barefaced is the most egregious everyday example I can think of (for me personally), and I doubt I’m the only one out there experiencing the same thing. The grip that beauty standards has on people is honestly insane, and seeing how some people were shot into stardom after getting PS done really cements that IMO.

[@bethanybanks5234]

EXACTLY!

[@vivijd14]

YUP!!! I had alopecia universalis for 6 years…the contrast between how people look at you with wig+makeup versus when I went bald or with a headwrap was quite dramatic! 🤷🏻‍♀️

[@Likelyfairy]

@@vivijd14 yes it’s been so dramatic to the point that for me personally I even feel uncomfortable w/o wearing makeup bc I’m afraid of what people will say or think 😔

[@burntc]

Damn... come to Germany, we may not be known for our fashion sense but I don't think I've ever experienced this in day to day life (I could only imagine this happening in high-class restaurants or shops).

[@Soapynah]

@@burntc I live in Denmark, so I’m not even that far away haha - idk if Danes have a different attitude towards being presentable or what, but I could wear the same outfit to the same places on different days, but without makeup the best case scenario would be people ignoring me and not greeting me back (little head nods when passing a stranger is common where I live), and worst case would be someone ignoring you/not listening to you or even saying rude things about your appearance (albeit rare). Maybe it’s a cultural difference? People have generally been pretty cool the times I’ve been to Germany, so perhaps we’re just a bit more vein (or whatever you wanna call it) up north 😅

[@ladyaarion]

I broke a small cartilage in my nose at 15 and the doctor offered two options to heal it: either to stick a piece of plastic up my nose to put pressure on the fracture until it fused (which, though uncomfortable only would take 3 days and no pain) or to operate it. The doctor tried to convince me to operate my nose saying “I could improve it aesthetically” (I have a high nose bridge) I started crying in fear, I really did not want to get surgery and was scared of what woukd happen if I did. It’s so unbelievably evil for a doctor to try and prey off of a teen’s insecurities and I’m glad I didn’t get it, I love my nose bridge so much

[@kato3247]

Throughout history, beauty has traced back to wealth - in ancient times fatness was idolised because it meant the person could afford to sit around and do nothing, more recently light skin and the frail figure was seen as ideal because it meant the person could afford to not be doing heavy work outside, and now the people who can afford to get plastic surgery to alter their body in ways that are, in the literal meaning of the word, unnatural are seen as the most beautiful. I just. Uh.

[@MistbornPrincess]

Today’s beauty is seen as skinny and tan. Our ancestors: wut

[@JaJaHerSelF]

keanu reeves' beauty sure is a universal truth 😌

[@catd8929]

period

[@sugarbomb187]

he's unreal it's crazy. Also, within the same category, Gillian Anderson.

[@JaJaHerSelF]

@@sugarbomb187 agree 100%

[@user-s3ts8my2x]

He's so fine

[@quillpen815]

Keanu's real beauty is from the pureness of his heart, but i'm sure retaining his physical prettiness doesnt hurt. 😛

[@gustavoliara]

Isn't it crazy how what's basically extreme body modification, the BBL with ultra unrealistic proportions, is now mainstream?

[@princessloveheartglitter]

When i think of BBL, I think about the Human Centipede and I get disgusted. That movie ruined surgery for me. All surgeries.

[@kon2175]

It’s pretty concerning for the future, I think. Like I have to wonder if I’ll have to do a shit ton of surgery just to get hired or promoted, or find a romantic partner, for instance. If we all end up looking like each other, anyway, won’t the beauty standard change again to something unachievable? I really hate the way this is going.

[@gimmeyourankles]

I remember in the 2000's, people made such a big deal on beauty procedures. Now they are just as common as getting a haircut.

[@lucia-di-lammermoor]

@@kon2175 Yeah... Only for women though (take a look at most successful men).

[@emma7933]

I know! I am relatively curvy, and I know other girls my age who also have a more "hourglass" figure naturally, and none of us look like what the BBL does. The part that gets to me is how you are expected to have wide hips but also have a thigh gap. Whenever you see pictures photoshopped like that or people who got surgery to produce that it just looks so uncanny to me. Like the legs came from another person and got glued on too wide apart.

[@katelynw3213]

To me, there's something so beautifully human about reconstructive surgery. Just knowing we have the ability to give somebody back a piece of normal after such a traumatic event feels like a miracle in and of itself. Seeing WWI era reconstructive surgeries always remind me of that.

[@Abishhhhh]

girl i am laughing at you . like really? My god

[@caitlintiulenev9156]

“Why would I want to be treated badly if I can opt out” = the woman’s dilemma for all of history

[@laurenrobson46]

Yes, so true 😭 I have intensely purple dark circles under my eyes (had them in childhood too) and I've always covered them with makeup because if I don't, people ask if I'm sick or tired or got punched in the face. Why would I subject myself to comments and stares when I can just slather three layers of $30 concealer on them? 😅

[@lilalizzard]

Very nicely put. I am naturally pretty and I‘m already afraid of what will happen when I get older because I am often treated better than other people who are not as „pretty“ as me. Like, I know I have some privilege there and I‘m afraid of losing it because I know what I would miss then. It‘s so fucked up because I never wanted to be treated better because of my beauty but here I am, it‘s happening and that‘s why I totally understand women who want to be treated better with plastic surgery because let‘s be real, who doesn‘t wanna be treated well??

[@trashbag6406]

@@lilalizzard Yeah, I try to see it as if my circle doesn't treat me well because of my looks, I need a new circle. I don't think anyone should be worrying about being treated as less because of their looks unless of course they are actually unwell

[@samiraansari5686]

@@trashbag6406 Sorry, but I'm not sure I understand the last part of your sentence. "unless of course they are unwell"?So you think people should be treated as less because of their looks if they are unwell??? What does that even mean?What kind of scenario would you apply that to? Like if someone around you gets sick you'll start treating them badly because of what they look like?

[@trashbag6406]

@@samiraansari5686 I don't actually remember what I meant? I didn't mean that I treat people as less because they're unwell ( I'm unwell myself so that's a given ) but I think I meant you should worry about it because naturally ( most ) people will stray away from you. For example if I had a skin condition of course people wouldn't wanna be near me. What if it's contagious? They must be dirty if they got that ( not saying they are ). Make sense?

[@jensenvillaflor8538]

The racial aspect really can't be understated though. Like you loose so much character and generational history when you even just get a nose job. Like that may have been your grandma's nose. Your great-uncles. I don't know nose jobs especially make me really sad. And white women trying to get more "ethnic" features, within the acceptability of beauty-industry co-option and decontextualization, doesn't sit right with me.

[@lekishagoel6610]

THIS!!!

[@Cat-tastrophee]

Couldn't agree more. Anytime a Jewish/Middle Eastern/Arab woman puts their elegantly curved nose under the knife for an upturned European nose, I want to scream. (See Kim K's new nose compared to her old one.) That nose shape is so overrated and overdone, and often it doesn't look quite right because the rest of the features don't match. I wish there were more diverse examples of nose shapes in popular culture, like for Disney princesses' noses. I still think that Jasmine is the most beautiful and she's literally the only one with a slightly non-European nose.

[@ST-111]

Yes!! Im arab, i have an arab looking nose that im tempted sometimes to get done. It doesnt really look like any of my parents or siblings noses, but i guess it mustve been some mixture of my grandparents noses? N when that thought came to mind (the other day), it made me not want to get it done. But im still tempted. Especially when i cave and edit my nose or other features on facetune, n then look at the original. It makes me feel like i look absolutely hiddeous before the edit.

[@corneliastreets]

I see so many girls with Asian features end up changing them because of this pressure created by the plastic surgery industry. I saw an Asian girl on Tiktok go under the knife to replicate Madison Beer's "perfect nose" because her nose was "too flat". What's wrong with having a flatter nose bridge? What's wrong with having a wider nose in general? I have to admit that my features steer more Western, but I never once saw a fault in more "ethnic" features. They're just different, but not any less beautiful. I hate how social media has glorified specific features (mostly European/white features) and exclude the vast diversity of beauty.

[@petrichorbones]

@@ST-111 the problem is facetune, not you! just wanted to say, i don't have to see your picture to know you're beautiful i'm sure of it!

[@anushkaswaroop6056]

Kinda off topic but since I was taught this in school - Sushruta who is also known as the father of plastic surgery, used to perform complex procedures in 600BC. He wrote a whole handbook called Sushruta Sanhita documenting ear/nose grafting, burn recovery and wound healing. It was meant to help soldiers recover from war injuries, general public from animal attacks, burn survivers etc. The aim was always to help those who were wounded and it was never about the cosmetic appeal!

[@nidhi2693]

this is so true. it's honestly so sad to see colonizers using a well-intended science for something as shallow as beauty standards.

[@r_arts2093]

I learned about Sushruta through Sam O’ Nella’s origin of surgery video(or something along those lines)

[@amisha25211]

@@nidhi2693 i agree! India was never nearly as shallow and vain as the west

[@ilyutasm]

GIRL YOU SAVED MY LIFE. i had a test some time ago and on the test i had to write a 30 lines long argumentative text about the trivialization of plastic surgery . on these tests you only get to know the theme of the essay as you are doing the test, so following your channel and seeing this video on the day of the release has saved my grades😭 TY SO MUCH I GOT A 9/10 LMAOOOOO

[@ilyutasm]

p.s i know your video isnt exactly the same theme but on the introduction of the essay you can start by giving historic context or something else and i was only able to write a good introduction and earn a good grade bc of u !!