The Snark Tank Podcast:

[@peepeestorm3187]

1:10:42 I love how NO one acknowledged the absurdity of "give me 20 bucks and I'll die RIGHT now" LMAO

[@irishempire9811]

The real reason it took so long for a new podcast is becuase they needed a new clone of Sweeny after the last one got blown up in Nepal.

[@simplesimon4374]

Chris just has a venture compound style room of Sweeneys

[@commissardale]

@@simplesimon4374 is Sweeny death-prone? I figured he was more accident prone and he'd just need a helmet

[@obsoletethoughts3930]

They grow new Sweeneys from the hand plants

[@Yumemaru.]

I know who edited this based on the first two seconds lol.

[@somecitrus7561]

Derrick: Our dog had mental health issues Chris: **starts cracking up**

[@comhaltacht315]

6:00 Sweeney becomes charred 47:30 Sweeney's Femdar goes off 52:00 Justin Trudeau passes a bill to distract folks from his 11th black face allegation

[@-perrywinkle-]

I agree with chris on the lightsaber crossguard, it should've been like a disc since the blade is omnidirectional and they even tend to whack sabers sideways against eachother in fights

[@MarcusTrinnias]

My friend had an Akita named Zen. He was a massive dog, but he lived up to his name. I have never met a dog that was as calm, friendly, and loving as that Akita. He was basically a giant stuffed animal. You could lay on him, and he'd just go 'aw yeah cuddle puddle time'.

[@cakenshake]

hearing you guys discussing sword design is kinda hilarious. And kinda made me wanna explain why guards are there to begin with and the reasons for the design of them. For simplicities sake a cross guard does two things. It prevents the hand from slipping onto the blade. It can also catch the blade of another sword or the haft/shaft of another weapon. There are other designs that have basket guards like what your can see on rapiers and broadswords, Disc/cup guards that you see on many Indian and Asian swords. And there is the classic knight Cruciform hand guard you see on many medieval to Renaissance European swords. With D shaped guards being on most sabers and cavalry swords. Some swords have extra extrusions called nails that go off where the flat of the blade faces. There are advantages to each design such as ease of production, wrist mobility, and safety. And each of these designs speaks of the intended techniques for each weapon. (Yes I am a fuckin nerd) Anyway back to star wars and kylo's stupid weapon design So lore reason for Kylo's cruciform cross guard is due to the kyber (force enfused) crystal he has is cracked. So the bladed is more powerful but less stable. So there are ports to help siphon off energy so the saber isn't made into a plasma grenade. Now the reason the reason why its stupid in the first place place is that the ports themselves aren't made from a light saber resistant material. So if the sabers clash and glide down the length of each other (which they typically don't because due to lore they more or less magnetize to each other due to the process of even making the saber ignite) that poses more danger to both Kylo and the opponent he's clashing with depending on how he holds it. In theory he can provide more pressure on his opponent with the other port as it's still ostensibly projecting hot plasma. But if he messes up one of those ports gets sliced off and causes the saber to become unstable anyway due the integrity of it's chassis and the crystal being compromised. This is assuming the ports nor the saber chassis itself aren't made of Saber resistant material which many of them aren't. Cause if you have to block with it then you are probably in a fucked situation anyway. But that's assuming the worst case for the saber itself. Another reason its dumb is cause depending on the direction he's holding it one slip up and he's scorching himself and possibly shredding his wrist holding the saber up. And therefore forfeiting the duel and dying most likely. It is such a dangerous design for Kylo or any wielder of any similarly designed saber that it ceases to be even worth the risk of added clash pressure. It'd be like if the Spartans had like claws in their arms or armor that they can use for melee combat that if they deploy them wrong it'll shred their hand apart, or if they used weapons that literally broke their bodies using just for an occasional niche advantage that in all honesty will more likely get you killed or out of a fight more often than help.

[@nekocup5524]

Tbh a sith using a lightsbaer that could kill them with one wrong move makes sense

[@cakenshake]

@@nekocup5524 yeah they are dumb enough to do that.

[@ZeroKitsunei]

I have two problems with Kylo's light saber. 1. The way the plasma looks already makes it look unstable. So you don't need the plasma cross guard... exhaust ports? 2. You kinda mentioned it off hand, but THERE'S MATERIALS IN STAR WARS THAT LIGHT SABERS CAN'T CUT THROUGH! So if they really wanted a guard they could of just made a normal one and said it was made out of that. They could of put some red lights in it and made fold up so it looked cool. Say there are sub crystals in it that stabilize it or whatever. Ever since the Inquisitor had the spinning one in the animated show they have just been out of pocket.

[@cakenshake]

@@ZeroKitsunei the spinning helicopter lightsabers. 🤮🤮🤮 Don’t remind me. And the reason why most lightsabers aren’t made of such resistant materials like Beskar, Mandelorian Iron, (we getting into legends here) Song Steel, and Ciricultium (forgot how to spell that one) was either honor or not wanting to show cowardice. Or in the case of the -C material it shorted out light sabers and basically forced a Jedi to either use force powers or force martial arts. Plus with Kylo its definitely the rule of cool. Plus it has symbolic weight showing his unstable mindset and emotional state. 😑😑

[@NeoDJDAN]

Sweeny looks like he's trapped in the backrooms. Save him.

[@i.e.4427]

Hope there’s no bicycle monster trying to kill him

[@Jenamphetam1ne]

Chris and Sweeney's new york approach to air conditioning is exactly the same thing that happened to me growing up in Southern California. The ac unit in my room is never off. EVER.

[@Kainpound]

43:17. As a born and raised Alaskan I can confirm that a Moose will Step over a 10ft fence with no fucks given. Any Alaskan will tell you that Moose are far more dangerous than Bears or Wolves. Those things can get hit by a truck going 50mph and stand the fuck back up as you and your car lay totaled.

[@flameboi7104]

Derrick finds the craziest clips for editing.

[@birdflox1337]

Wow, this has been the most comprehensive episode so far!

[@flameboi7104]

All my favorite podcasts have King of the Hill impersonations. Glad to see the Snark Tank is no exception.

[@MySqueezingArm]

What other podcasts are you into fam?

[@gabewilliams380]

@@MySqueezingArm SuperMega probably, they do it a lot

[@TintelFruit]

47:54 He mentioned the wendigo, I KNEW he’s actually Chris from Until Dawn!

[@bpt2067]

“What is this the TimCast?” Was absolutely hilarious

[@phillipjohn4800]

Cracking up at Derrick describing his parents as 'two n words that banged'

[@ilovecody7514]

I cannot believe Tom Sweeny uttered the word "Gaybies". Haven't had a stroke that hard from laughing since "Celestial Simp".

[@xenos_n.]

Thank ye, gentleman. This is my favorite all-Asian cooking podcast. You all and Internet Today help keep sane.

[@blackwingdragon1]

Honestly I hope that they do go through with Morbius 2 just so Sony can be taught the same lesson a third time.

[@kimorayn1733]

"It's not always about the money, Spidameen" *Spiderman pulls out gun*

[@Kainpound]

46:00. Polar Bears are larger than Grizzlies (but smaller than Kodiak Bears) and they will actively hunt humans.

[@matthewwalsh1468]

1:45:00 - Thank you for letting me know that I'm not the only one who does this...thought it was my OCD!! ☺️

[@minecraftsteve73]

1:01:43 Dennis Prager kills the gaybies

[@graemebennett7648]

Every week some of my best laughs come from watching the podcast. Thanks, my dudes

[@bicuriousdirtbikeboi2594]

1:07:00 the zombification in the movie The Serpent and the Rainbow is absolutely horrifying

[@mbetogarrod]

As a kid I visited my family in Kansas. I met a lamb there and became friends with this little baby sheep. I have a picture of me at 4 next to the lamb. Went back a year later. Looked for my homie. And they told me they ate him. Never wanted to fight someone more in my life

[@mbetogarrod]

@@PodreyJenkin138 bro I was like 4 years old lmao

[@MySqueezingArm]

Liquid Death is a fun product. Was given to me as a joke, it does taste a little different (which I assume is the can taste).

[@kimorayn1733]

"Boy, stop throwing acid on those women there, Bobby"

[@dolphinboi-playmonsterranc9668]

King is based on a Japanese heel wrestler named Tiger Mask. There's an anime. It's pretty much just Baki but wrestling.

[@Gravekeeper5890]

Finally! My mental crack is back.

[@mateuszostrowski3730]

Brandon Rogers makes skits that are ads for Adam and Eve, and they're hilarious.

[@h4ming]

Thanks for the episode guys and Derick.

[@jameshayes9322]

1:03:20 I'd like to imagine that Dennis prager doesn't actually know through some magical means that the babies are gay he just assumes that they will be Based on their parents

[@stupidchild7716]

"This baby's father likes musical theatre and his mother voted for Al Gore, it's evidently a gayby"

[@studentwhoworries]

Which episode had that write-in with the Syndrome N-word incident, I NEED to know

[@ThePhantom4516]

It’s an earlier one, i relistened to it recently but I can’t remember what episode it was

[@HalfBrainGamers]

Episode #21 - The Last Great Spoof Movie, 36:25

[@studentwhoworries]

@@HalfBrainGamers Thank you!

[@sauceboss7081]

Chris is a triangle Sweeney is a square and Derrick is a circle

[@kylemaloy5524]

just me or is there no audio

[@TonyTama]

This has been a refreshing podcast cus I own a staffordshire pit mix AND ITS INCREDIBLY EXHAUSTING listening and reading internet tough guys claiming theyd murder pits and would say shit like a good pitbull is a dead one.

[@chaos_omega]

You guys talking about crossguards has me triggered, I gotta go watch Skallagrim.

[@christianmbong]

Having liquid cooling doesn't actually affect the amount of heat the computer generates, it just helps the pc move heat out of itself more quicky. So while the same amount of heat goes into the room, a water cooled PC will actually warm things up faster.

[@Yaduny]

Lovin' the new intro and outro 👌

[@GT-qv1gl]

Liquid death looks like Spite's album cover

[@jameshayes9322]

1:41:38 I feel like racist qui-gon is the type of energy we need to make starwars great again

[@mathieuleader8601]

I'm hoping this is the first cinematic introduction of the Musical Meister

[@limemime565]

I remember the lead of a band I was in spent out entire first practice telling us about his liquid death water promotion and why it would be good for us

[@Kieransm09]

I love how we suddenly veered into the Braincel Podcast when the topic of sword hilts came up

[@hsuhru2051]

I think they could get Stav on even though Ludwig might be a bit bigger than them he was able to get Stav on his podcast The Yard and he wasn't ever in the stand up world outside of his college comedy club.

[@Bysentenial]

"We all went to school with someone like that." Did we? wait... oh shit i was that kid.

[@steelgriffin7716]

I will never not laugh at "Elsie Bray's Pyramid Scheme."

[@equidistanthoneyjoy7600]

Looked up liquid death, and you know what? I'm here for it. Water bottle companies are really just plastic bottle companies, so why shouldn't it come with a cooler design? Plus, aluminium is typically easier to recycle and less damaging to the environment than plastic. I still don't typically drink bottled water, because there's nothing wrong with the tap water where I live, but if I did I would probably go for something like that.

[@yowatchie]

Nothing more disconcerting than the sound of Derrick slurping saliva while talking about women.

[@OwnageMancer]

1:45:05 Oh shit. People do that? I always inject my aids in the 3rd box onward. That way I'd be long gone by the time anyone picked it up. My bad guys.

[@Greyzillah]

michael vick visited my school and apparently the reason he got dogs to fight was because he had terrible credit cause as an athlete he got so much money so fast that he didn’t know how to manage his money

[@SolidOcelot]

1:53:48 Crustaceans have eyes Sween they're just fucking black voids though

[@than217]

And here I went and made a snide comment about them not uploading any more episodes on the last one this morning.

[@Ryzawa]

Starfield and TES6 are both on the new Creation 2 engine, which is an overhauled form of the original Creation Engine and it's debut will start with Starfield, so we'll be able to see what's new before TES6 is released!

[@Alex-bi9mk]

Cope

[@Ryzawa]

@@Alex-bi9mk Seethe

[@trinidaddy]

​@@Alex-bi9mkwhat a weird Ioser lmao

[@eisenhead]

moose can also swim really well so there is no escape

[@than217]

Tom Sweeney: "Russians ... they don't get afraid right."

[@Kvitebjorn257]

On the meat thing, I assure you stuff like grass-fed NZ beef tastes so much better than lab grown

[@L0Ve1yHDPixel]

5min of silent for the hours of fun and shenanigan lost in the corruption.

[@kinglarry3727]

Liquid death is the affliction shirt of seltzer water

[@lizurd]

Funny cumtown was mentioned cause it’s my second favorite podcast behind this one. Both always having me laughing my ass off.

[@dr.muffins9628]

Vegan cheese made me unreasonably confrontational after eating it

[@AdeelTariq0]

Musical joker would totally work with the right tone

[@masonthemetalhead]

I just want more sandbox for my elderscrolls, if six is literally morrowind with QOL improvements they will be redeemed in my etes

[@rogercheetoofficial]

Hollywood zombies are actually closer conceptually to Ghouls, traditional zombies are more akin to servants than monsters

[@will5026]

I would donate $200 if that means Derick stops going on this show for one episode a month.

[@kenn4579]

no sound

[@Coldsteak]

unmute pc

[@midaritrash]

no sound 😭

[@johnguidoiv6431]

Sounds like last week’s episode

[@nineseven2807]

the double sided lightsaber is practical

[@WordoftheElderGods]

I hate the bits where they mistake extreme cynicism with cleverness/they think they're clever when they get really really cynical (Derek on the train bit).

[@cokeMONSTERps3]

1:02:00

[@LanceUppercut]

Michael Vick was absolutely not playing at a Hall of Fame level (before or after his prison time), lol.

[@aceofsharks9837]

The funny thing about Kylo's lightsaber is that it *looks* like it's silly, but it's literally the most practical/dual efficient lightsaber in Star Wars. Shadiversity (sword KZbinr) recently did a video on the different types of lightsabers, and Kylo's cross guards are actually super good.

[@syndromeofadowns]

It's a fucking lightsaber. The extra tips on the side make it infinitely more dangerous to use

[@jblackburn995]

RAID BLUE VPN! the ultimate sponsor.

[@MySkilletfan]

Any reason the release schedule is so fucked?

[@FoxyGrandpa1]

Liquid Death is amazing

[@ThePhantom4516]

It’s literally water

[@Chadronius]

Just use a filter and call it The Alps. Boom, you now have knockoff liquid death, AKA Fluid Demise.

[@demo0831]

Sweeny? absolutely not the average swimmer as a grown adult is averaging 35 seconds-40 for 50 meters. A dog does not swim as well as humans. Humans are actually pretty good swimmers all things considered

[@steelgriffin7716]

Derrick buying and financing and INSURING a car. In VEGAS. Yes. Geib munni

[@chrisclatt]

KING and Armor King are wrestlers wearing Jaguar masks.

[@rodentcitadel]

1:06:02 I think there actually is a movie about people making a zombie movie in a zombie apocalypse. Can't recall the name but uhhh I think it might've been Japanese?

[@will5026]

Derick acts like he can have any legitimate opinion, and acts like he is smart, but does not understand different legislative sessions have different bill numbers. How is this man confident in himself

[@trinidaddy]

"How is this man confident in himself" you'd be hard pressed to find a more internet loserish comment than this one. "This person thinks they're always right without knowing anything, yet IM the one who thinks they should be insecure for disagreeing with me, because obviously I'm never wrong" really putting your "university degree" to use with that logic. You might as well toaster bath at this point, can your life become much more of a joke than it already is, wasting all your time trying to act like you're smarter than youtubers that you obsess over.

[@lucasnicht3347]

no intro?

[@mynameisjames12189]

Thanks boys

[@Bysentenial]

I'd pet the bysen. I may be biased.

[@AngraMalnyu]

the crossguard discussion killed me inside a little, but great episode nonetheless

[@mechanicalmoses9387]

Wait i thought steam boat willie and mickey mouse are different character. Steam boat willie goes into the public domain in 2024

[@MaximumAaron]

Liquid Death: Straight from a tap they named "The Alps"

[@erothae8013]

Long live the king!

[@sekiro_the_one-armed_wolf]

??? Darth maul’s saber isn’t supposed to be a spear lmfao

[@Chadronius]

Dark tank with some coconut milk

[@will5026]

I hate derick 60% of the time

[@kimorayn1733]

Y'alls discussion of AC and Food being Absolutes made me wonder if that's what fucked up the past generation's mindsets in life. People are dumb but that is a broken conduct in behavior; Turn on the fucking AC, and EAT every day that you can, well. GG Boys.

[@KZ3fps]

I have never found a pitbull cute. They have weirdly boxy heads

[@jurassicroom7673]

1:02:00 gaybies

[@AB-wn3qz]

Who would win: Justin Trudeau wearing black face or Dennis prager on the hunt

[@KiwiMessiah]

48:45

[@kbub1234]

Brain dead takes about dragon age, origins is a complex strategy based rpg that requires planning and knowledge of mechanics unless you dumbed it down to easy... inquisition is way more simple and I just sit there and hold left click to attack, I never had to switch party members, set up heals at the right time, or utilize my abilities in strategic ways to win difficult battles... I could hold left click and occasionally press the do more damage button and it feels as brain dead as easy mode origins throughout the whole game on harder modes... not to mention the terrible retcons and story, but at least it plays better than 2 did

[@Greyzillah]

ezra goes by they them pronouns, sweeney(i’m saying this as politely as possible to all members of the cast just that sweeney was the first to use pronouns on them and though they are a bad person that does not justify the misuse of their pronouns)

[@kimorayn1733]

Morb 2: Die Harder.

[@RampagingCat107]

Who fucked the files? I'm thinking Sweenasaurus, with his track record with Twinkies and the such.