These Behaviors/Beliefs Keep You in Trauma-Driven Patterns, Relationships

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Trauma bonding, abandonment wounds, triggers and more... This "best-of" compilation covers some of the trauma-driven beliefs and behaviors that draw MORE trauma into your life and keep you unhappy. You can change these patterns and heal your life.
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[@tamsparris-bah8283]

Anna really is a true life fairy 🧚‍♀️ I was thinking about this just today. The question I've been asking myself today is: How can I transform my life? What do I need to do? Because I no longer feel like I fit into the one I'm living now. Thanks to Anna I'm much clearer about my trauma and how it's affected and impacted my life. But, I feel stuck because as I look around me I no longer feel like I belong where I'm at with my circumstances and situation. I need to shed this skin 😩

[@colleenadams1125]

Me too!!

[@cayad2591]

yeah same here!

[@sunnyadams5842]

Yup. Same here.

[@sandyboffa]

When I came across Anna's stuff for the first time, I felt the same way! It was like a being in a dimly lit room and then all of the sudden the light switch got reined in and I saw how messed up the room was and I wanted out. I started (and still continue) with her "Daily Practice" and that one thing has truly gotten me on the path towards shedding the old dead destructive crap I had in my life💜You're in the right place🌈

[@tamsparris-bah8283]

@@sandyboffa Love your description of the light being turned on and seeing all the mess and chaos in the room 😃😃😃. This will be how I will be describing the light bulb 💡 moment when explaining this to people from now on. 👍🏾

[@exiled_0ne]

God PLEASE protect this woman at all cost. Anna is saving lives ona whole different plain. Thank you so much❤️🙏🏾

[@savioartwork]

And men . . .

[@barb8268]

Yes, definitely getting bob ross/mr rogers vibes via her soothing voice and gentle language.

[@missgolightly5488]

​@@savioartwork ,huh? What do you mean "and men" ?

[@PaperclipProphets]

@@missgolightly5488another comment said that Anna was saving women on a whole other level & he added men too because she’s helping both genders equally😎 Hope that helps clarify & as I type I realized that mostly women write In & I’m not sure if I’ve ever heard Anna read a man’s letter, but clearly men are watching, listening & learning. I’m sure the fairy 🧚‍♀️ reaches countless people who don’t comment. God bless you 🙏

[@naturalist369]

Praying for us All to Angels . We can all pray to Angels & access protection when we raise our vibration to unlimiting positive possibilities 🎶💕🙏🏼😇🌟🌠💫

[@ewolffe8355]

Cptsd can make a child feel that they are responsible for fixing relationships. They need to work out how to keep their parents happy, and its their fault if the parent is angry/violent etc. This incorrect belief can then translate into adult relationship - friends or lovers. The truth is that someone being crappy to you is crappy. They will stay crappy as long as they are getting away with it. And unfortunately there are plenty of people with cptsd to keep fueling the fire.

[@ketoles7777]

TY for this Wisdom. Often I have been my worst enemy.. Now I see Why..I must get free from rutted rotten beliefs and pay the price of transformation. I am worth it

[@Verena101]

Sometimes I have the feeling, it's to much wadhed over. I mean by that, that sometimes children do mistakes too and even tough ones. So it's ok and understandable, when parents, teachers and all that, get angry and say stop. But the thing is, how they do it. And another thing is, when parents are psychological ill and dysfunctional and traumatized themselves and then are behaving like shit, ignorant and cruel to their kids, because they don't feel well! And not because the Kids did something bad. So the crappy thing is, when kids get harmed out of nothing. Or allthough something is Not their fault. In healing from trauma, WE should see and reflect clearly, what Others did and what WE did. As an example: I was raised in a toxic and dysfunctional family. They were most of the time. My parents were often nasty narcistic and so on, I don't go into detail now. That was very bad for me! I remember, I was a few times also not nice. I did tell my mother, she didn't cook well, when she didn't or I found the food too boring. Yes, I wased before, while and after that criticised by her a lot. So I was used to this form of criticising each other. But because I was born as an empath and with big spiritual heart, I only rarely criticised her like with the food. Most of the time I helped her, took care of my siblings, made the household and tried to solve their marriage problems. So I parented them. Because they didn't parent me and us so well. The point is to ask oneself: Where did I really do mistakes too? Where was I mean to another one? Were do I wanna be better in contact with others, Like clearer, but friendly and empathetic, even if they behave strange? When we are more self healed, we can help others better to get out of their missbehaviour by staying clear, friendly and calm. So if a mother says here: uh....my children are so this and that. Hm. You are older then them. You were there before they were there. How did you treat them? What were you as a role model to them? And only because you had trauma, they are kids and they don't have to parent you, even if you had to parent your parents. (Just in case). Because it's the false direction of WHO is for whom responsible. Traumatized mothers or parents forget that or don't know this and mix it through. But if you are the mother, you are responsible and not your child. OK, of course can narcistic character roule there too, If a child got used from a narcistic parent to hurt the other parent. But hey: it's good to think of, what is a healthy direction of responsebility and how looks a healthy role acting of a mother, of a father and what should a child may experience and live like? Victims often go into this,me me me, thing too, as narcistic people do. And don't ask the kids how it was to have you as a parent and what they missed. So yes, heal yourself frst and be allow yourself to cry over it. Or to be angry, but under the anger isactually sadness and disapointment. Then, after you only have focused on what others did to you, look what you did to others and where you failed ir. And if very healed and strong, one can connect with one by one child and ask: how are you ? How was your childhood for you with me as mother or father? And don't defend yourself. Just listen and after that you can Tell your (adult) child, what you have been through and what your problems were. And that you are sorry for haven't or couldn't have done it better at that time. Do say sorry!

[@mbrsart]

I'm really appreciating these longer compilations. They allow for more binge listening to all this gold. I've been trying for years to heal from all sorts of trauma, and it seems like every time I start to make efforts something happens no retraumatize me. I feel beaten down and feeble, and every time I try to reach for a door in my little fortress, my brain hits me back to say, "These walls are here for your protection. You've never seen anything out there that is good for you. The life you want doesn't exist, and you're so damaged that you don't deserve to have it anyway." Therapy is helping but not as much as I wanted it to. These videos have given me a sort of renewed strength to change my situation.

[@Verena101]

I don't know why, but I experienced it years ago too, that therapists that are really good, are rare. They should understand you, help you with reflecting and selfreflecting and encourage you like a good coach, to go for your goals in life. (Of course when they are not harmfull to others 🙂). But somehow you go there and it doesn't help much. Strange. It's the Same as everywhere...they want you to stay longer...a woman told me, she would be in constant therapy since 17 years. Uhg...usually you don't get payed that long by the insurance in Germany. Even in our ,social, system, you can get usually at maximum 50 sessions and then you have to wait two years, to get new sessions payed. Maby in worst cases it's different, I don't know. But of course 50 is much, if they would get used efficiently! What they aren't usually. And the other thing is, until you get just a place by a therapist, you wait from three months to a year. Mostly half a year. And when you really need help irgendly (dringend), than you have to wait never the less. And it's not said at all, that the chemistry then, between the thetapist and you is fitting or that it is helpfull. And Here is a lot about insurance reasons missleaded unecessary therapies too. Another woman told me, that she is only physical i'll because of parasites and worms that were found in her liver etc. Doctors Long time didn't find out, why she got so many foodallergies, fatigue, pain in her body etc. It ended up by this, that she couldn't Work anymore. Now she found a private to pray doctor, that can and is going to help her. But that the insurance pays her time, when she can not work, she had to go to the psychotherapist. Allthough she and the therapist said, she doesn't need nor want this sessions! But she has to go, because they think, she just would have a psychological problem. Hm. Imagine, they pay for her sallary/income and waste a lot of money to her sessions where she don't want to go. And others with huge psychic problems have to wait a year, to get her therapy place. I tell you, German (or elsewhere) logics are strange and uneconomically.

[@miavos3610]

I see my life explained - 73 years of it. Even one year of understanding my life will be worth it.

[@melodeelewis462]

Yes exactly. Feel to old and no desire for relationships, The one day is better than the merry go round of mental health treatment. Thank you for insight. It made me crazier with traditional mental health help.

[@joeljoy4144]

I live in Idaho just a few miles away from the original, iconic Oregon Trail. You can still clearly see the wagon wheel ruts from the 1800s. Those ruts are so ingrained into the soil that nothing grows in them, even after almost two centuries of non-use. Childhood trauma so ingrains our brain patterns into ruts of behavior. It takes effort to break up those "ruts" to allow new "trails" of words, deeds, social morays, and a new generational pattern for future generations.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Great analogy! Thanks for sharing :) -Calista@TeamFairy

[@joeljoy4144]

@@CrappyChildhoodFairy Calista, you're my favorite co-fairy. You are so sweet.

[@robinhood6954]

Talking of childhood trauma.. Those wagon wheel ruts.. Can you imagine the childhood trauma that took place in those days - the slaughter, the torture and killing of prisoners by the various Indian tribes - it must have been hell on earth for so many of those early settlers (who were usually forced to relocate).

[@joeljoy4144]

@@robinhood6954 in reality, very few were killed by belligerent Indian tribes. Something like 2%. The rest died of sickness and accidents. But trauma, nonetheless. Historical inaccuracies: they didn't circle the wagons from protection against Indian attacks. They did it to keep animals from wandering off. Trying to create a different life isn't without cost or hardship, whether it be finding virgin lands or breaking free from the "ruts" of childhood PTSD.

[@robinhood6954]

@@joeljoy4144 It's not so much the individual numbers but more the fact that such ordeals had to be endured by anyone - especially children - during those times. When I was staying in the Ozarks I read a book entitled 'Frontier Women', and all I can say is, they sure showed more courage and endurance than any woman has to today. We should all be grateful for having arrived in this world AFTER the worst was over (apart from all those still being duped into going out and fighting various 'orchestrated' wars of course).

[@cbennett3754]

I cannot consume her information fast enough. 52 and now finally seeing my issues. The Fairy is Real.❤

[@lindawise5546]

69 and learning. Loved " The fairy is real."! Keep going. XXOO

[@gigidayz6936]

57 and I so agree!!

[@MrSnojonz]

51 and right dere witcha!

[@jennyferguson5583]

64! Working it, takes time. Grateful for This Woman

[@rebeccadubarry8523]

You are not alone. It has taken me years of "drive bys" to tinker with all her valuable information ❤ be well. 49 and going on🎉

[@Byugytctrc]

Not even a minute in and already the tears are falling. I see how much this topic affected my soon to be ex-husband’s ability to be in a healthy and loving marriage and my heart breaks for what could have been. What could have been his healing and happiness, what could have been a loving and happy marriage, what could have been our children that never arrived. Thank you so much for posting this. I don’t know that I’m ready right now to receive your message in its entirety but I’m hoping to be strong enough in the future, even if just momentarily, to slowly listen as able to. God bless you for putting in the time and effort to helping us heal. I just wish and pray that my husband will one day heal, too.

[@lindawise5546]

How are you doing? Your comment is so touching.

[@YWHsDaughter]

I learned not to take ownership of other peoples bad behavior. Their bad behavior has nothing to do with me. It’s their problem. I got out and it CHANGED EVERYTHING!

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Thanks for sharing, I'm so happy to hear that :) -Calista@TeamFairy

[@Clevelandsteamer324]

Hard for an infj

[@KarrieVareberg]

Oh Anna. Gosh, I don't know what to write except I am compelled to say thank you. I am in the midst of "it" right now. The clouds have parted after 40 years of personal discovery. I am currently doing the daily practice every day, it changed everything! My God! what an instant and noticeable change. Again THANK YOU! I sought your newest videos and looked up your specific shame meditation to help me deal with a situation I blew yesterday. I can feel like my dysreg will be much shorter this time. I'm saving my money to become a member

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Wow, that's amazing! Thank you for taking the time to comment, I'm sure Anna will want to read this. -Calista@TeamFairy

[@christopherhazen6940]

Yeah I get it universe. I hear you. I AM self-sabotaging. Going for unavailable people. Working on it 💪

[@sunnyadams5842]

Good of you to own it. 😁 I realized I've been an expert in this Crap-Fit area, too.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Boom! Great work just saying it! -Cara@TeamFairy

[@pilula65]

Same here. And I've just realized that. 👍

[@sgm6603]

Anna has gotten to the core issues I myself have. Finally someone is that cued in and I thank you. I am in the Behavioral Health field and she tops any therapists. 🙏 I personally need Anna's audio/videos. I'm so grateful.

[@northstar1432]

My name is May so it felt like you were talking to me and I loved it. In your videos it often feels like you are talking to me and about me. First comment ever and thank you for the many ways you are helping me and everyone else that watches. ❤

[@MariaColomy]

@1:55 Healing begins when you make the decision to question your trauma-driven beliefs.

[@anju8376]

im finally going to be one of the ppl posting a thank you. i think i have just managed to finally heal. without this channel, i would still be wasting my time and money trying to make talk therapy work when it simply doesnt work for me. thank you for the information, the gentle way of giving tough advice, and not just regurgitating the same old useless advice that “mental health professionals” always give. cptsd is not a diagnosis in the dsm, yet it was what ive been suffering from for decades without help. i just did the impossible and saved myself from drowning, and this channel has been a huge help. im glad to know it’s here if i have slip-ups and hard times in the future. 🖤 sending love and well wishes to anyone else going through it. you are not alone.

[@extraordinaryEJ]

Feeling this

[@designchik]

I love these long videos you release on Sunday mornings, Anna. I so look forward to watching them while I eat breakfast and have coffee because I have the luxury of time to take it all in. Thank you. 😊❤

[@user-ih3wd9sf9l]

God bless you, Anna. I have been binge watching your videos for about a week. I am amazed at the mindset shift I've experienced in just this short amount of time. Your voice is so comforting and soothing. I also appreciate it when you include tough love for accountability and a clear perspective. I am 34, and until now, I never had the words, much less the tools, to describe what I felt was "wrong" my entire life. Now I have hope, thanks to you and a fantastic and supportive therapist that I can discuss these topics with. You sincerely deserve an honorary doctorate or even a Nobel Peace prize. Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart.

[@Verena101]

Same in Germany. There is behavioural therapy, deep psychology after C.G.Jung etc. And nearly no traumatherapy/therapists that are financed by insurances. The few traumatherapists that are here, work private. So it seemed to me like the government (or who it orchestrates), is only focused on the different symptoms and results (illnesses), than on to heal the roots of it, the trauma experiences. So I am glad to have found this channel.

[@heatherblack8311]

her voice is so comforting! i agree! ❤

[@MeghanDonnellyIPY]

Has anyone else been binge watching the Fairy like me? Is that an avoidance technique? Lol 😂. Thank you Anna! I have been doing the Daily Practice. Your work will forever change how I view and handle my family.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

So glad to hear this! I'm curious -- how have your views changed?

[@yordanilazo8149]

I too have been listening/watching a lot. I’m hopeful this will shed some light through this wall I have been building to protect myself.

[@MeghanDonnellyIPY]

Meaning what I thought was normal, I can see now was not healthy and why we are the way we are. But even though it wasn't my fault, it is my responsibility to heal!

[@kevinmasterson5733]

This one is awesome. Listening to Anna's common sense, practical approach has guided me to trust my own instincts and has helped me a great deal in figuring out what works for me in healing & moving forward. I realized that I really don't get "triggered" by much. I am pretty fearless in that way. However I can get dysregulated very easily at times. I feel like what has been my challenge that had me so stuck & frustrated is that I didn't know how to get regulated and would therefore think that "talking about/confronting" the trauma would help. For me it was just a waste of time. Since I have started to put my focus on getting regulated my life is improving dramatically. I feel like I finally see a way forward and have a plan. Thanks again Anna. See you next week for the seminar. Best, Kevin

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

That's amazing! I'm so glad the channel has been helpful :) -Calista@TeamFairy

[@extraordinaryEJ]

Agreed

[@karenyoung4746]

I’m SO GRATEFUL to you for your ANSWERS! I always knew that *something* was wrong with me. But, I couldn’t explain it to myself. My childhood was awfully traumatic. So….as an adult, I would take anything to feel some sort of comforting love. And, I suffered from abuse & abandonment. THANK YOU for your explanations. I am making good changes. ❤️

[@ebonyjackson3198]

I wonder if Melanie's father actually had another family and was living a double life. Sounds like her mother was the mistress. It would explain a lot about her past, especially why her father never protected her from the abusive mother. It's strange how our past traumas keep repeating themselves in relationships until we heal. Watching your channel is really helping me.

[@Verena101]

The mistress thing is something actually only men can do. Cause a mother won't have two different households in two cities and children with each. 😮 But women can have kids with several men and do as if they were from the man they are with. As I heared, this happened too, of course a lot during wars...and from time to time still will happen everywhere. But No matter which way, this is painful for the kids as they find out and at the end hurts all. Or makes ill. Sick relationships cause a lot of chronical illnesses.

[@ManolaGarcia-t3v]

Trauma Bonding wired from childhood survival. I deserve to heal, and to connect with people who are healing too. I don’t accept any more toxicity.

[@IamStreber]

Raging is terrible. I used to do that. One day I decided to wait until an argument was over. When I was alone I fell to the floor and allowed myself to cry. The cry was painful and releasing.

[@MyAngelAlfie]

Am I too late? I turn 40 v soon, and I feel despair, things are worse than ever, I'm at a zero point in life, any advice please I'm in a desperate situation with no help or support

[@AuntClara0911]

No your NOT to late. I was a bit older than you when my eyes Finally opened. I don't know your background But the biggest thing I learned was to look at who I had in my life from the beginning. I learned what a sick, twisted mother & family I had. Anyway through learning some Major reveals I removed them from my life. With that I got far more selective in who I let in & with that some amazing, wonderful people filled that void. I was blessed though as I had an incredible husband for support & his family & more reconnected with my father. I'd been lied to my entire life about my Dad. Turns out he was the far better parent & learned mother a sick, lying narcissist & I the black sheep. Anyway there are SO many Great therapists on You Tube if you don't have good, easy access to therapy. Don't give up. Biggest thing I learned is to love but More like & enjoy being with yourself! It's then worthy others want to spend time with you as well. Blessings to you for better days ahead!

[@katiekane5247]

Every day you wait, it gets harder. I don't regret making the jump just wish I'd done it sooner. When nothing can be as bad as where you're at, anything is better. Scary but survivable!

[@MyAngelAlfie]

@@katiekane5247 thankyou for taking the time to reply, I appreciate it 🙏

[@hoosfoosfull]

Are you in a relationship?

[@karenjohannessen8987]

You're never "Too late" until you're *actually* Dead! You can do this.

[@cierrafreeman1513]

I started with the prompt " what would I be without pain/trauma" and could not answer...so I wrote my current values (ie trauma responses) and their manifestation at work and relationships. Then transcribed the opposite of those and came up with the new state of being. Thank you!! This was beyond helpful!!

[@sookiebyun4260]

I don’t trust the people I bring into my life because I choose victimizers. It is better to be alone. I was drawn to an abusive male therapist. That was the last straw.

[@extraordinaryEJ]

❤

[@alittlefox13]

I never got to stay at home during the pandemic, had to keep turning up to work, having contact with lots of people and taking care of my students both in person and online, but had to go home to my empty house, unable to see my emotionally distant avoidant (now ex) boyfriend or friends. Everyone else were group FaceTiming and I would ignore the call. I couldn't bear to hear how hard it was for them all staying home. I was so exhausted and wanted time out from people but wasn't given the luxury, and resented everyone who got to stay home. I have never mentally recovered from the stress and pressure of my job at that time. I think I am still full of resentment. I was always a social butterfly - always invited to the party. Now I don't care about anything really. I have just discovered your Chanel and started the daily practice as of yesterday. Thank you for all you do.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

I think the Daily Practice will be beneficial for you. Thank you for sharing your experience with us. We're all rooting for you! Nika@TeamFairy

[@alittlefox13]

@@CrappyChildhoodFairy thank you

[@DeJaVuNous]

I started the daily practice a week or so ago. After a few days I noticed I had less things bothering me. Writing it out and releasing it really does something powerful! I'm glad i gave it a go. I've intended to do that practice for a few years and I am glad I finally tried it out. I'm watching this video from a new place...as someone who is more healed, who sees myself as capable of finding deeper and deeper levels of peace. It's largely thanks to your channel that I have made sense of my trauma and found the right tools to get well again.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Thank you so much for sharing a few of the details about what the DP is like. This is so helpful to people who are thinking about it, but having trouble believing anything so simple could make difference. I'm so glad you're here!

[@extraordinaryEJ]

❤

[@mirjamenny]

Damn my father and my sister programmed me to seek approval from the shittiest bosses until I woke up and started breaking those patterns.

[@extraordinaryEJ]

Yurp

[@maemae7497]

The abandonment mélange is interesting. I've been fighting against a critical attitude towards an ex friend who stood me up for dinner plans, and then I completely switched on them, and for the past 15 years I can't stand them, and I know its irrational. Maybe them standing me up triggered this abandonment well for me I suppose its rage rather than sadness.

[@cherbuck1525]

I'm pretty sure I have a Trauma Bond with my parents. Lately, my father. While caring for my Dad, he expressed enjoying getting to know me again. Soon afterward I accidentally found out he was having an affair. He cut off communication with me for 8 months. Between Thanksgiving and Christmas he text me. Then he cut me off again. I'm coming to terms with accepting that our relationship will never be the same again. Grieving a lot in the process. I'm not chasing him as much as I did at first. Having dreams of him dying without reconnecting lately. Working on my fears and resentment.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Working out those fears and resentments is the way to go! We have more support in our membership, lots of people who are caring for parents which requires a lot of support! bit.ly/CCF-Membership -Cara@TeamFairy

[@joeyfdh9890]

You are without a doubt the best therapist I ever had, (and I had a few) without even have met you in person. Thank you for your amazing work, you are truly a life saver Anna! So much love ❤

[@dianawelles1726]

I ruminate. And ruminate. And ruminate. Then I get some breaks which are very nice. I like isolating. I like being alone spending time with myself. It feels like the right thing since I chased after people because I was so lonely when I was young. It feels good to not be lonely and to like myself :-). I only found this channel recently and I thank you because I can relate.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Hugs. You're with us now.

[@JosephDCLXVI]

Reminds me of both my parents...Purposeful. God I'm so fucked in the head, well, not as bad as before

[@extraordinaryEJ]

You can heal , start by looking into your own eyes in the mirror, it gets better ❤

[@mariademers3111]

Could you please address why cptsd people sabatoge great relationships then get into challenging relationships that need people fixing and helping. This has destroyed my life.

[@bumblebee_ms]

This young 25 year old girl is so lucky she can heal at that age.

[@danniolsen1960]

Ohhhh Amen girl! You're wayyyyy ahead of the game as I'm almost 65 and just found Anna a week ago! I watch her all day every day and am working the daily practices now. Already going out and about and to the gym, so encouraged about getting back Into the business of life!!! Thank you Anna!!!

[@bumblebee_ms]

@@danniolsen1960 I'm late 40's and feel like I've wasted my whole life away. So glad you are doing well, you've inspired me.

[@SlippyLu]

Dear Anna, after watching many of your videos and continuously finding so much truth in them, I have just noticed another thing that I haven't come across yet: is it possible to be emotionally disregulated in a positive way with CPTSD?? I'm very familiar with the hurt and pain, see many toxic patterns in my families and my own life choices, but what if I also get overwhelmed by my feelings when I'm happy or hopeful? Like there's suddenly so much energy, joy, hopefulness, ideas and enthusiasm? But then quickly, as my head is filled with all these positive thoughts, it starts going through the roof and my heart starts hurting..!? I feel love that is overwhelming! Is this a possible part of CPTSD? Normally, I would assume it's more of a pointer to bipolar disorder or some other form of emotional instability as a character trait (according to Big 5).. maybe could you do a video on this? Thank you so much and thank you for all the greatness that you bring into this world!

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

We welcome a letter from you! bit.ly/CCF_Letters -Cara@TeamFairy

[@ylana4444]

It’s funny…I love my therapists and I find talking about my traumas really helps me….I don’t talk to friends about it just my therapist…i am also doing EMDR and it helps a lot…. I do journal but sparingly…I just don’t find that writing or journaling works for me. I need a real human being to listen. I never got that growing up I guess. It’s like I need someone to actually see me. It’s validating…writing stuff down on paper just doesn’t do it for me for some reason..Thank you though for your videos. I learn a lot from you!

[@marysisunik2931]

Connect with friends you haven't heard from in years...I did...We were so happy to speak! Try not to isolate.

[@FavoriteDeputee]

Anna, do you have any advice for people who have relatively good instincts, are at a place where they are most attracted to good/available people, but become paralyzed by high levels of anxiety and self-consciousness around those good people? This has been a persistent issue for me in romantic attraction - even if I have good reasons to think that the other person is appropriate for me and interested, the anxious feeling can still be so overwhelming that it's near impossible sometimes to even make eye contact or have a conversation. My dad never wanted me to be vulnerable with him or vice versa; the emotional vulnerability I feel in romantic attraction is viscerally terrifying. It's horrible and I get stuck on people for way too long because I can't get past my nervousness to even guage if we're compatible or not. I have ended up staying way too long in bad relationships with emotionally unavailable people, partly because they're just easier to talk to.

[@lauracarstiou3505]

No offense but l think you lucked out finding the right partner. I crap fit without realizing it until it's too late.. because l never met someone who accepted me or could make a commitment. I'm fine being single. Men fall all over me and l just brush them off but then one comes along who really attracts me. And I want intimacy so l take a chance. I'm not being vain when I say l attract them. It's how l look and because I am empathetic and l feel like I am empowered. But l have CPSD so I attach too strongly. My sister was like me with worse mental problems and found a husband totally devoted to her. That's why I say it's just luck

[@nimaojama488]

Dear Fairy, Thank you so much for doing this amazing educational channel. You are my favourite KZbin Hero❤

[@davspa6]

That's the keys, stop the disconnection, the dysregulation, and the self-defeating behavior. You said it at about the 28:30 mark. And just start anywhere you said...!

[@adinahwithkaden]

Anna, I am so happy I found you. I, too, grew up in a poor and dysfunctional family (alcoholic mother and narcissist father) in Berkeley. And your work is really helping me.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

I'm so happy to hear that! Thanks for commenting, I'm sure Anna will want to read this :) -Calista@TeamFairy

[@HobsonP]

I started listening to you a few months ago. I did it mainly to help my 14 year old granddaughter whom was abandoned after her mom just left her. She had been abused, neglected, beaten and locked in yer room for 6 years. I have found your lessons very helpful for me as well. because I have CPTSD. I am 66. I have recovered. But I spent 10 years in therapy in my 20's & 30's working through my issues. Thank God for you! You are helping me help her❤❤❤

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Oh, I wish you all strength to help your granddaughter! What a gift to her that you work on your own healing!

[@HobsonP]

My granddaughter is a gift to me! I Love her so much I would do anything to make her or me better! Thanks for y'alls kind words of encouragement.❤

[@VariationsOnASeam]

Hi, CCF. I do NOT like talking about trauma, issues, problems, etc. So I'm glad to hear you say that talking about it can be counterproductive. But I have found that writing in a journal about issues also makes things worse. I feel like focusing on problems only amplifies them. I've found more peace in noticing my triggers and reactions as they happen and then "talking myself down." What do you think of this?

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

I agree. I haven't used a journal in many years. I teach specific methods that are for freeing oneself, not reviewing the bad stuff.

[@kirstentaylor7249]

​@@CrappyChildhoodFairyhi there, I have complex ptsd, and I would like to learn techniques to mentally and physically and emotionally self regulate.

[@just1certifiable]

Even though I was aware I grew up in a dysfunctional environment I didn't give it much thought since that is the way it was for nearly everyone I've known. I was aware that there were more than a few very traumatic situations I was part of that no one else I've known has ever had to deal with. When the bad situations ended and the sun came up the next day, I would continue on like it never happened. I never thought of myself as the victim since the trauma had happened to my mother, not me, I was just the helpless bystander, and if she never brought it up neither would I. So, here I am now 60+ years later and only now, because of concepts such as shadow work and podcasts such as yours do I realize that I too was affected and that trauma doesn't go away simply by not thinking about it. I never realized that it might be the reason I've always pushed people away and have no one close. YT comments are my main source of human interaction. Pretty sad, huh. And that is just the tip of the iceberg on my laundry list of dysfunctions. I dislike the idea of needing to spend time dredging it all up again, but the need to do just that remains constant now So, I've watched the first couple videos of the daily practice and plan to start this evening? As a hope-a-holic, I am hoping it will be the key that allows me to fix all that is broken.

[@heatherblack8311]

Anna don’t change a thing. Your videos have put me to bed so many nights as mantas for not feeling alone. just to have someone saying all the things i’m doing thinking feeling saying. i just really appreciate and respect and love you and your content so very much! keep going! ❤

[@littlewoodchopper2659]

I keep thinking I'm healed, then boom, I realize I ain't over anything.

[@sarahjmount9221]

Me too! And I do the daily practice and continue to watch all the videos and do see a therapist every week for 10 years now! Honestly, what’s it going to take?! 😢

[@TeaRose9]

Thank you amazing Anna for this awesome video and all of your others. You have a gift for articulating the mental health issues we experience. I’m beyond grateful for you. Also thank ms to followers who share their stories as I can relate exactly to many.

[@thecommonsensecapricorn]

I’ll never forget how my dad would come home from work every evening mad as hell (because he was drunk) picking fights with me, and I never submitted because I’ve always had that warrior spirit, but that of course made him more angry. I’d usually be grabbed and dragged by my wrists to my room, and thrown in there. Without fail, the next morning, there would always be a card slipped under my bedroom door. “I’m sorry. I love you, dad.”

[@chickensandwich3398]

Please keep making these long ass videos. I quit watching shows and am on the self help train. Even when I'm barely listening to it I'm absorbing it subconsciously. I tired of the narcissistic abuse videos because they're so negative and cause me to ruminate. This and positive affirmations are what I can stomach now that I let go of the fantasy.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Thanks so much for your comment! Caleb@TeamFairy

[@industryliaison]

Would you consider making a video about the 12-step groups? I’ve been visiting groups but it’s not clicking for me to go there and share. It’s like the 3min time limit is not enough.

[@chiarayavhnoska966]

I've been in therapy for years now, understood my self-sabotaging bag of tricks ...and then fell again for a man who seemed all but emotionally unavailable. We had genuine potential , and I was actively working on myself now that the old reactions had a chance to get triggered, but he would leave me at any argument, be blatantly passive aggressive when not, and refused psychotherapy or even self help. I wish I could believe he cared about me, but his defenses so unaware... He chooses to believe the worst of people so he hasn't lost much... My therapist says it matters that I tried honestly but I keep asking myself how I did not see he was not interested in trying to talk...

[@PaperclipProphets]

The beginning of this video was exactly what I needed to hear today, which confirmed what is at the crux of my perpetual problems. The wisdom in the 1st five minutes of this video is comparable to a thousand dollar$ and countless hours in therapy. Anna, your work is so amazing and your success story is inspiring on many levels. Thank you Wisdom Fairy 🧚‍♀️

[@yuk498]

Anna, you look lovely and I love striped Ts! 💕 And I absolutely love the content of this video. Your voice is calm, and message both wise and gentle. Thank you.

[@katiemaguire9073]

For some reason, I feel really depressed and sad when I listen to these situations. My situation is not as bad as these but it screws me up so badly I feel like dying.

[@alfreire72]

I would love to meet you in person Anna... to thank you for your work! You helped me so much!

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Thank you Ana. I'll be doing live workshops this spring in U.S. and Europe. Maybe you live close to one of the cities? bit.ly/40GTJwD

[@jackiegab9394]

Where about in Europe? Hope in Northern Europe 🤗

[@GMediaStudios]

I've heard of trauma bonds before and resonated with that, regarding my recent dating life. But somehow the way Anna said it made me realize my relationship with my ex-husband was that, too. And why it hurt SO BAD, how disproportionally wrecked I was when he left me. I was addicted. It was more than just a divorce. Damn... OK so now I'm thinking about my sister's different reaction to our shared trauma. I'm a faun. She's a fighter. She has a well adapted, healthy life and never procrastinates. Never seems to have shame or compounded issues. I on the other hand am the opposite. And you know, part of that I'm sure is because of the labels we got. I was the "good" daughter with the duty to fix everything. She was the "bad" daughter. I wonder if- because of the labels we got as kids, my sister got a head start on the healing...?

[@fefiforum]

I’ve shared your videos with many of my friends who are supportive, wonderful, kind and also can benefit from your practices and daily tasks. Thank you for your all your great help, support and excellent work! I listen to you every morning and finally know how to approach my interactions and emotions properly

[@bonhomie6275]

I'm a 19 years old man who suffer from CPTSD, Gaming Disorder, Adjustment disorder mixed with anxiety and Depression. My gift is strong sprite, which consists of high resistance, resilience, and strong intuition. It trigger me so much when talking about neglect and abuse, and I just want to be hide from this world.

[@joeljoy4144]

Hey, fellow Childhood trauma survivors. Do you want to try an incredible version of meditation? I did this today. Do your meditation upside down on an inversion table. What a relaxing rush. Clearing your mind while getting a head rush of blood. Go upside down to feel right-side up! LOL. Oh, if you get dizzy being upside down, don't do.

[@elina3713]

Thank you so much 🙏 your words resonate and hit home like nothing else. I love your practical approach because when your caught up you need practical steps...you can tell that you speak from your heart and personal experience and I am so glad I found your channel as it is exactly what I need. I used to write a lot and I was proud of how I handled life but after getting caught up in a trauma bond I lost myself and stopped writing, for the past 6 months the universe, from every angle has been saying to me 'write write ✍️' but I didn't know how to start until now, the steps and practical approach is just what my exhausted mind needs right now. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for sharing and helping people on their healing journey. Bless you ❤

[@HH-gv8mx]

I relate so much to these videos and to the women writing in. I wish there was a club where we could meet women who are like us who understand and get it, and could be kind and supportive and start a friendship with. I’m so isolated it’s scary.

[@noremac0123456789]

I ONLY seem to attract unavailable men. I just gave up on dating sites because it just seemed like every man was wanting very inappropriate relationships and somehow even that makes me feel rejected, unlovable and literal misfit. I know that I’m not responsible for what they do or say but I guess it just triggers something in me feeling not good enough, not worthy of a good guy because I’ve probably never had one. I had men who were just less worse than others. My parents were both alcoholic and I feel like I was raised in a come here/go away relationship. My mother was completely self absorbed, couldn’t be bothered with her children and their needs. I’m currently, barely in a situationship that is barely even that. I know it’s unworkable, we don’t even really get along that well but even the idea of me telling him that he should no longer contact me or me taking a stand and and not contacting him gives me major anxiety. It’s as if I’m so satisfied with the absolute bare minimum of effort. I’m very much into limerence and fantasy with him, it’s something that I’ve turned to since I was a young child to cope with the rejection and abandonment I felt from my parents.

[@Yriel129]

Intermittent reinforcement is tricky. Sometimes it's far from intentional or openly malicious. I had a relationship with a person who displayed signs of a dismissive-avoidant attachment style and while there was a great deal of good communication, the lack of emotional warmth kept me sort of hungry at all times. I remarked to my therapist that had this girl been more open emotionally, I reckon I would have seen our incompatibility clearer. But the emotional distance made me chase her and proved fertile soil for the build-up of limerence. I don't blame her per say. It's who she is.

[@crystallparker9247]

After years and years of therapy, thanks to you, I finally started to realise what is causing a lot of my anxiety. Although I have a long way to go, I pray for healing and health. I wish you all the best and may you be blessed. ❤❤

[@tanningandtarot]

If she can see this: run. Run like hell. You’ll be fine. I was in a relationship like yours for 7 years and it eventually got physical. And then it eventually graduated to him trying to kill me. And even after that I still stayed because I wanted to help him and I got lucky that I finally got my head out of my ass in time before he did kill me. Holes in walls, damaged cars, getting my head thumped off tile, being forced to sleep outside in 32 degree weather, being screamed at if I didn’t have sex with him when he was drunk. It will get to that point. Miles needs to save himself and he is choosing not to. Run before you end up in a casket and he ends up in prison. It is not your responsibility to save him.

[@annekincannon-kf3hx]

Yes, girl! I am so happy that you got your head out of your ass too! I like the way you put it. Blessings on for a healthy life for your future.

[@susanwillans3444]

Your work is so helpful. My last narcissist-I was able to just turn on him, tell him off, and walk out the door. Thank you so much.

[@lanefaurot]

You have positively changed my life! It’s good now…thank you ❤

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

I'm so glad!

[@extraordinaryEJ]

Samsies

[@erikalarsson]

Yes iam so isoleded and lonly .

[@juliai9960]

I definitely need to reconnect mentally with people.

[@extraordinaryEJ]

Same , and it's difficult ! ❤

[@user-fb1ys2lj9c]

I get it now. I didn't know how to let go. I am ready now. Thank you Ana.

[@jackiegab9394]

At the age of 57, I am still struggling with letting go of a very long time chaotic and broken relationship 😟

[@ttlill07]

Everytime I get hope that a person is not damaged its a lie. A punch in the throat. I honestly believe I am here to catapult people to change but not for me so they can be better for the next woman so I am good. I do better alone period. 40 years alone happened for a reason. What's 20 more?

[@karenwalsh7014]

I find your work fascinating. Thank you for all the videos, they are very informative and you articulate the problems with childhood trauma very well. One thing, I'd like to know more about the technique of writing things down and praying them away? Is there a video specifically about that? ( the one you learned from a girl who had done the 12 step program ). Thanks!

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

it's called The Daily Practice. It's linked in the description section of every video I make, and available on my website.

[@thecommonsensecapricorn]

@54:24 oof I dated a man like that. He was not only twice my age, but just like my dad, even had the same birthday. He was a functional alcoholic, the kind who just drank at night but would drink til he was drunk every time. And then he’d become really mean and terrifying. And nothing could snap him out of it. That relationship was last year and it severely retraumatized me, after I was making some progress in my healing. He’d then come tearfully apologizing to me the next day saying that I saw “the dark side of him”, that’s all I needed to know. I don’t want someone with a dark side. I’m so glad I escaped from that situation. I really escaped. I was full fledged panicked around him every day

[@405OKCShiningOn]

Changing beliefs matter. I changed mine and am changing those.

[@extraordinaryEJ]

Moving along I agree ❤

[@mattng4707]

Crappy fairy mother has explain allot more than most adults and doctors and therapist i have had over the years.

[@stacyyoust]

@40.00 "It's better to be true to yourself more than to be true to your story." That's deep.

[@Bryan-mh6fx]

Anna I want to thank you for being the most important person I was supposed to come in contact with in my miserable life. Everything that comes out of you is going into me totally comprehended straight into my memory I'm blown away how everything everyone one of your topics I'm going yep that's it I get it it's helping me so much thank you so much you are so awesome. The I hate about videos on KZbin is setting waiting on the good part telling whoever is doing the video to stop rambling get to the good stuff. I don't have that with you ever 😊 You completely on point with every word. Yours truly Bryan P. The Lone Stranger ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Thank you for your kind words! I'm so glad you're here :) -Calista@TeamFairy

[@Bryan-mh6fx]

@@CrappyChildhoodFairy Well kind words is all that someone should have for someone like yourself that has done so much for me and everyone else for years I can't imagine the hours and hours of work and research for me and everyone like us .Hope to actually meet you someday thank you so much for being so pro feel so lucky to have found you .God Bless ..Bryan P / The Lone Stranger 🌞

[@HistoryBytes111]

All feelings, at their root, are being created by Qi (Chi) or life-force. A 5,000-year-old Taoist spiritual technology will allow you to transmute any negative feelings back into the life-force that created the feelings in the first place. The Taoist approach recognizes that this universal medium of the life-force or Qi (Chi), is governing not only our internal world of feelings and thoughts, but also the outer world of nature. For example, in the Taoist approach, it is the Wood Phase of the life-force that creates the human experience of anger, or the virtue of Kindness arising in the Soul. This same Wood Phase is also responsible for making a tree grow and for the expansion of our universe - Excerpt from the book “Emotional Alchemy the love and freedom hidden within painful feelings” by Andrew Kenneth Fretwell.

[@extraordinaryEJ]

How interesting ❤

[@justjess986]

Thanks for sharing will try getting that book…super interested!

[@KaziHelen-c6v]

Crappy Childhood Fairy, Here is momma’s hug to you , after all the things that happened to you including getting surgeries while being a solo mom- I can understand, and you have risen above that like a phoenix and guiding others so that we don’t get lost, I was on the verge of making trauma my identity- but yes I can’t let the story take over me and keep writing my own story. Lots of love and best wishes ❤

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Thank you. What a kind note to start my day.

[@darcyhouseman2290]

Just got introduced to you yesterday. A friend of mine was sharing her victory and was asking me questions about my life. As i listened to her I became so angry and the pain was so bad. I know at this point that when that happens the Lord is starting to heal another area and there is a wrong feeling. He’s brought me so far already, and is I listen to your videos I realize I was almost everything you say. BUT GOD! I LOVE people and get to be sunshine wherever I go, except those people very close to me. As I listen I feel so much shame that I am this way, I know I get to speak Gods truth about who I am instead and learn who I am without this trama. I don’t remember the first 8 years of my life. A few flashes have come into my mind, but over all I don’t. What do I do? I don’t want any more closed doors.

[@jlbc1234]

I’m new to all this but have lots of childhood trauma and as an adult with a very narcissistic emotionally unavailable husband for 33 years. Is dysregulation where you think you mess up really bad or your husband messes up really bad and you just go into this downward spiral that is so hard to get up out of?

[@sunnyadams5842]

Kind of but not exactly. Anna has several videos which describe precisely what CPTSD and Dysregulation are and how to heal it. It's an injury to the nervous system. It can manifest as thinking you ' messed up really bad', but it's not just that. She tells all about it, but one thing that helped me understand in the beginning is how the heart brain body synchronization gets out of rhythm. Our emotional response gets out of wack and when challenged, the left side of the brain, which controls logic, gets suppressed as a result of childhood neglect and abuse and the right, emotional side of the brain lights up like a Christmas tree. And you feel weird and scattered and tend to overreact. Check her stuff out if you want to know more.

[@jlbc1234]

@@sunnyadams5842 thank you. That explains a lot about what goes on in my body actually. The left side of my brain always hurts.

[@extraordinaryEJ]

❤ it's a messy but necessary beautiful journey of growth good luck and we'll done

[@darlavaneerde7067]

Anna you truly have God given gifts ... your clarity and comforting manner of expressing tough love are a nourishing blessing to so many!

[@marcusdenning1649]

Your information is the best thing I’ve seen. I had a terrible childhood due to ADHD and neglect. I was under a tremendous amount of stress no kid should go through. Everyone thought I had a great childhood from the outside looking in. ☹️☹️

[@rebeccadubarry8523]

I hope to one day be as understanding and compassionate as you, Anna.

[@MrHorthoren]

28:00 YESSS! Connection! That's how we all work! We each need connection in our own special ways, some would call that community! We all have something somewhere that makes the world go from stress stress stress, to, oh, things make sense again. 29:57 Once you're able to talk about it, even just once, you need to put those feelings into creation. Something dark and destructive has happened to you, but things swing back around, it's just hard to find what really drives you back into gear. 33:00 Wouldn't it be wonderful if we all just understood each other? Oh, and disconnection is more than likely possible for most people. It's all mental. You created, even if it was just to destroy the paper in a bonfire. 36:00 There's a theory I have about this. With each of us, most of the time, societal interactions are stressful, so it's pushing a button in each of us, resetting our focus back to whatever trauma we need to have time to deal with and bring out into the world in a creative way. There's a trap room in D&D where the players are forced into a room with a single button in the middle of the room, with a timer on the wall that slowly ticks down, but resets when the button is pressed. So the players press it again and again, trying to figure out how to get out, until they resign themselves to simply letting the timer go. Poof, anxiety goes away and the door opens, often times with a gift to the party in the form of currency or equipment. It just takes a lot of time to figure out what it is that you need to create. 37:56 The ability to choose is terrifying sometimes, but rewarding when you finally internalize it. 38.27 Hey, look, what helps with trauma can be put out front first with creativity in some way. 39:28 Yeah, but you're doing a great job in helping people. I have my current endeavors partially to attribute to the healing process. 41:15 Heeeeeeyyyyy, novelty. It's a magical thing to create something new! 46:59 Button press, button press... love yourself, protect the button, see the love. 49:52 I got about 70%, but I could be a little more generous than I should be. Just caught myself picking at my feet while staring at my personal planner. Hey, look at that, need to occupied the hands with something creative, otherwise it goes to destruction. 1:01:30 Knowing you can do nothing to help another person with everything is a grand step in the healing process.

[@w3n33dam1racl3]

I have had crappy relationships due to my behaviors. They were toxic, immature and childish. Subconsciously I was expecting people to be whst my mother and father wasn't or didn't give me. I was still searching for a father and mother spiritually. Like a child with their parent, the child isn't expected to reciprocate and give to the parent. This is how I was operating. It's playing out in my marriage. Subconsciously my I have made my husband my father. It's destroying my marriage and I don't know what to do.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Trauma-driven beliefs put us in all kinds of difficult situations, but having this insight is the first step. Keep watching and you'll get ideas for how to put things right. If you haven't already, try Anna's Daily Practice. bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice TeamFairy

[@ez9566]

If there is no single choice you can make to get things better, just know this: you only live once is something you shouldnt See as preassure to make the most out of something, but life literally isnt worth wasting on stuff you hate. An exemple: school just gets you to uni, uni to work and work through life. You could hustle to get better grades, promotions, works, but then what? If you look back and just see time that passed, is that really worth continueing? In the end, everyone ends up being old, but the way can be different. Th

[@SilviaOohlala]

I appreciate you, Anna 🌺 thanks for all your sincere, heart-full work. I’m sorry if you get some reactive messages, though I expect you understand (I’ve tried to express my appreciation before, but have not found the board open). Also really enjoy watching you talk to another of my favourite survivor/coach people. Please keep doing what you’re doing - urging people to not allow their lives to be limited by rough starts (and middles! Lol). Maybe one day I’ll write you myself 😘

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

You’re very kind. I’ll make sure Anna reads your note. Nika@TeamFairy

[@chrisadimitriadou]

Hi! I've been trying the last week to download the cptsd quiz but even though I've registered my email 3 times, I haven't got it yet. Is there some issue with the website?

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Email us at [e-mail] and we will help you out! -Cara@TeamFairy

[@tabithaflanagan8556]

How do you get confidence in yourself when you live with bad people? Do teas or light therapy help?

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

You can start working on yourself despite them. Try the Daily Practice to deal with the inevitable fears and resentments. Free Daily Practice Course: bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice Caleb@TeamFairy

[@carolyncervantes6828]

I appreciate ALL your videos...this one is special! Ypu are helping people thank you a d blessings❤

[@ElyJane]

OMG Anna your story about putting a dime in the slot to send an electric current into a chicken to make it jerk in pain to music to make it appear to us humans that it was dancing has really triggered me so much I had this experience near the Taj Mahal in Agra when I travelled to India An Indian man was playing music whilst holding a bear on a chain The Indian man was surrounded by Western people. I went over and to my horror every time a westerner threw money into the pot the Indian man would tug the chain which was attached to the bear’s nose ... and the pain from this tug would make the bear rear up onto two legs and jerk in agony ... in time with the music I was so horrified I burst into tears I was so angry that the westerners were actually enjoying watching this bear look like it was dancing to music The blood from the bear’s nose and pain in the bears eyes as it was ‘dancing’ .... still torments me to this day Westerners are just the cruelest people to get pleasure out of seeing suffering in others

[@hopefully2224]

Thats an offensive statement! Not all westerners would enjoy such a horrible thing. Your stereotyping is very disrespectful and small minded.

[@extraordinaryEJ]

💔ikr

[@naturalist369]

Releasing is the only path to surrender to the higher frequency of the universe. So glad you're daily practice is geared for this, thanks 💕🙏🏼😇

[@barbaracampbell7747]

Would it help to say Jesus said love one another

[@msdixieblues]

Lots to unpack here and jowls I am seeing that I'm carrying around the self sabotaging beliefs from my emotionally abusive father.

[@extraordinaryEJ]

Scars deep doesn't it ❤

[@extraordinaryEJ]

And that weight , feels as heavy as lead , you can transform this though I promise you the first step is seeing it. You're om the road x❤

[@marysanders257]

So many thanks for sharing this Healing!

[@WithMyOwnEars]

Hi Anna! I have a person in my life who is/was limerent towards me. He is married and I know his wife. What boundaries can I enforce when I need to see this person and sometimes even work with him?

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Sometimes saying really firmly, "there will never be a relationship between us, ever" helps to break the spell. It's not on you if it doesn't work. -Cara@TeamFairy

[@hopefully2224]

Anna thank you for all you do.