These Sounds Trigger The Hell Out of a Narcissist

[@narcabusecoach]

Download Free Guide That Answers Top 10 Questions Asked By Every Survivor of Narcissistic Abuse: www.emotionalabuserecovery.com/

[@galaxy98765]

This is right on. A story my mother told me before she died haunts me to this day. When I was less than one year old, I became very sick. My fever was 105 degrees Fahrenheit. I was screaming of course, and my father couldn't stand my screaming, so he took off. He actually got into the car and drove off. My mom called the doctor and was told to take me up to the hospital immediately. (This was in 1952, I don't know if there were ambulances in our town or not.) How my mom got me to the hospital, which was way over on the other side of town, by herself, is beyond me, but they put me in a tub of very cold water to get my high fever down, and it worked. Me being so sick, though, must have scared my mom a lot. I could have easily died. But my father didn't care, he just didn't want to listen to me screaming. My mom sat up all night with me. I did recover, but for the next 56 years, until the day he died, I was constantly being abused by my father, who was a malignant narcissist. When he got sick with cancer, I took care of him and I did an excellent job, his doctors told me that I was "at the top of my game". The stress of taking care of him for a year almost killed me. I lost 20 pounds just from the stress. He was just as abusive, in even nastier ways, when he was sick with this terminal cancer, than he was before. He died in 2008. I have more peace in my life now, but am still having trouble, because I often think of all the horrible things he did to me, my brother, and my mother. I have learned a lot about narcs and can spot them now, from a mile away. I have HOPE that I will continue to heal, but it is tough. I also beel badly for all of you out there who have also been abused by narcs. Here's hoping we will all heal together. I am 72 years old and don't know how much time I have left to heal. But I have hope. ❤❤❤

[@joancramer3675]

Ask Jesus to help you. Utube about how Jesus dealt with Narcissists.

[@sameralmansory6902]

Read the Final revelation, the Qur'an...what have you got to lose. I know it will help you, God willing 😊

[@engleharddinglefester4285]

Hang in there. I feel your pain.

[@soeleuterio]

Gosto de lembrar de coisas simples que me dão alegria. Caminhar perto da natureza, sentir o cheiro da mata ou do mar. Estar com o pensamento no momento presente. Que Deus permita muitos anos de alegria para você!🙏

[@galaxy98765]

​@@soeleuterioThank you so much for this. I appreciate it very much. This is the best advice I have had in a long time. Bless you. I will follow your advice. With ❤ from Gwen in Washington state near Seattle. 🤗

[@annjohnson8437]

All spot on. My narcissistic husband screamed at me to "shut that kid up, I have to work tomorrow" on many occasions when our children were babies. He freaks out now when I laugh and joke around with our adult children. I am supposed to be serious in his presence. I can not stand him. He is pure evil.

[@galaxy98765]

To AnnJohnson: Pardon my language, but WHY THE HELL are you still with him ??? Hello ????? DIVORCE that monster. Go ahead: show your adult children what you are made of !!!!!

[@joancramer3675]

I know a lady who went and divorced her husband of 5 adult kids after 50 yrs The preacher told her it was acceptable due to the abuse. Later he died and left her the home she did also work for. Stayed w/ Daughter n worked JCP❤

[@ericacecchini3998]

OMG! My ex did the same thing….. Told me to SHUT that baby up “ I’m tired “ instead of helping me . They have NO heart whatsoever

[@gracebe235]

@annjohnson8437…..When I knew it was about time for my mom to come home, I had to be ready to look gloomy and down…..if I was laughing, smiling, just being happy, she would scream at me and call me an @$$, or say that I was @$inine. She would still comment on why am I ‘always’ unhappy….but that was better than dealing with being called derogatory names and screamed at for being happy!

[@eeyoresgirl55]

@@galaxy98765 way out of line. Your behavior is unacceptable.

[@michelleaththas659]

You are so right, we were not allowed to laugh in the house, it would make him very angry, and we had to stop.

[@seameology]

Nope. My step-dad would tell us to shut up. But eight kids laughing? He'd scream at us at the top of his lungs.

[@WorthlessDeadEnd]

​@@seameologyWow, what a monster. I am so sorry you had to live with that. 😔

[@viccoluba]

I know I’m not supposed to argue with a narcissist, but after holding all the bs ,lies and gaslighting not to mention the future planning in, I had a heart attack,it was then that I came across your video and I realized that I was married to a narcissist! I also realized that my mother was a narcissist and that is why it was so easy to manipulate me! I don’t know what came over me, but all the anger I had kept inside of me,came out! And just then he said something to me and all he’ll broke lose! I stood up and with both hands I pushed him backwards yelling on the top of my lungs,:” who do you think you are? You are not my mother nor my boss! Then a few choice words,he was so stunned and confused,he said nothing! So I pushed him into the corner and with each push asking: What gave you the right….. I brought up everything he has done to me and then I told him if he ever so much as thinks about putting me down etc, that I would destroy him! It worked for awhile and then it didn’t! So I told him that I would file for divorce and he laughed and said: oh and who is gonna support you?! The next day I filed for divorce and a restraining order! Tomorrow he will get served! All I can say, I never felt so good then when I pushed him and said everything he did to me! Pray for me please cause if the judge didn’t grant my request, then I’ll be in trouble!

[@MarthaFrancis-d6w]

You'll only be in trouble if you stay, honey bunny ❣️ Prayers are going to be your support ❣️

[@laurac.9322]

🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

[@CounterfeitChristianityCanada]

Good for you my dear ❤

[@Lilrumbles]

Restraining orders do little to deter the people that require getting one in the first place. Be careful he might try to insight you into hitting him. If you hit first you’ll get arrested for assault. They know all the tricks or try to get you to act crazy in front of other people which is easy to do because of all that you’ve endured. Above all, be very careful and diligent and don’t speak to anyone even if you think that they don’t talk to them because they also have people they speak to. They haven’t necessarily possibly come out with the fact that he calls them once in a while so if you cease to speak to him, and he can’t find you then , don’t be so sure

[@naturalhealingmexico]

Find peace first, these demons need to be treated like serpents, be careful they are tricky and wicked people, always ready to inject their poison as soon as you down the gard , I wish you healing, and now he knows how to trigger you, he will try to make you anger to get that reaction of yours, don't give him the pleasure.

[@ericacecchini3998]

Also , they always have “ RESENTMENT “ towards anything

[@ilovecanines]

Adult temper tantrums - creep as heck.

[@fly_ona_wall729]

1. SIGHING, NARCS NEED FEEDBACK. TRIGGERS. 2, CRYING of your child, zero empathy. 3, LAUGHING trigger. Internalizes and takes inner offence. Jealous of your happiness. Need for in sync mood syncronization. 4, SOUND of their own voice. Sound dysmorphia vulnerability. 5, SILENCE in convo which means uncertainty. Feel exposed. Silence is peaceful. They will keep talking and can't stand silence. FILL THE SILENCE.

[@tammyhollis1519]

A narcissist calling card is stonewalling, yet he is fragile when you ignore him. #diabolical

[@Libra22-10]

yes jealous of your happiness. one should eirher be serious or sick

[@jeanaallison7236]

Laughing out loud. He is vile. Do not show ANY emotion. 😢

[@SamanthaJoYo]

My husband has to talk 24/7 and I'm always hyper aware, I can't tune him out (though I absolutely should be able to because it's him talking AT me, not TO me. I spent over 3hrs recently only responding with "yeah.. mmm hmm.. that's crazy.." no real exchange of opinions and ideas..) and it is so exhausting. I just want peace and quiet sometimes. He cannot fathom that concept. There's no such thing as comfortable silence in my home.

[@bridgetsieger2261]

This is absolutely true. So true.

[@skinnybear5743]

Triggered big time on special occasions and holidays. Everyone happy 😊 and just have to 🌧️ rain ☔ on the parade.

[@Buckley-qk6fq]

Sexlessness. Sharing a bed with someone who doesn’t acknowledge you are a sexual being hurts so much. I was in a sexless marriage for years. Being a woman with a high libido, I felt inadequate. Worst I feel invisible. The man who was “supposed” to want me, just didn’t. We talked about it many times, more than I can recall now. It was always me. I wanted too much - once a week was too much for him. I didn’t initiate - he was always complaining of headaches, stomaches, always stressed, always tired. I was too sexual - when being subtle doesn’t work, what is next? Explicitly saying I wanted sex. Oh but then it was not appropriate. Conversations would end up with him saying he didn’t feel desired or I made him feel emasculated because he didn’t want sex as much as I did. Yeah, it was always me. I could never win. While we were dating we would have a decent amount of sex, it was good. The first huge red flag was not having sex in our honeymoon - which I ignored. It rapidly decrease to once a week, then every other week. Years gone by it was months in between, by the time we divorced it was over a year with no sex. I cried myself to sleep more times that I can count. I didn’t understand what was wrong with me. Was I that undesirable? Was I repulsive? After those conversations, I just stopped trying, initiating, mentioning sex. We were still loving - holding hands, hugging, kissing - but sex was off the table. He then cheated on me. Swore he had sex only 4 times in a year (or more) long affair. It didn’t matter. For years my self worth was damaged by him, years of low self esteem, years of feeling less of a woman, the marriage that was more than over, waiting in hospice, really ended. Funny how things are, I asked him for a divorce, he manipulated me into staying, next day his infidelity came to light. I was out as soon as I could. Best thing of my life. Additionally, That feeling when your partner cheated and you don't have the courage to leave him / her so you just death with the pain and live everyday asking questions about your worth. This pain is different from the cheating one_living and seeing him everywhere anticipating when he or she do it again. The best thing is to hire a private investigator digitalinvestigate@gmail. com to help you spy on their cellphone remotely just like he did for me...

[@voiceseven]

Disclaimer : This is an advertisement of a private investigation agency. 😂

[@Lovelace069]

Can you get in his phone if its locked?

[@phyllischaffin4052]

My narcissistic father gets upset over the sound of me coughing, breathing, etc. If you make a sound, it upsets narcissists. If you go silent, they get uoset. You can't win with these psychos!

[@ricklegendary2990]

my yorkie licking her paw ticked mine off

[@maritzacaruth9283]

I was in labor with my 3rd child, his first. He went outside to smoke. When he came in my adult son's were laughing (jokingly) about getting tattoos of their new baby brother's birthday which was to be 4/20. He came in and insisted they were laughing at him. He was so belligerent that the nurses threatened to make him leave. I was mortified & still had no clue what I had gotten myself into. I am so grateful for your videos. Only recently have I began to strike up a conversation with anyone around, whenever I hear my covert mother let out an exaggerated, "Huugghhhh." I refuse to be sucked in and triggered anymore 😊

[@franken-pattern]

If you have a disregulated nervous system due to PTSD/CPTSD, you will also be triggered by certain noises or sounds. Danish is very smart by distinguishing between trauma triggers and Narcissists thin skin for us.

[@dean314videos9]

MAN!!!!! You know your stuff! May YAH bless you and keep educating us

[@J.M.R.0913]

Yep...my covert narc husband will destroy anything that brings me happiness. Then stares at my face to make sure I look unhappy. So, now I keep happiness to myself and I enjoy it very, very much! Also, whenever he wants supply, to be on stage and have me as his audience, that's when he initiates conversation...mostly about him or when he gossips about other people. So now, I just say that I've already heard that story and change the subject. That's the fastest way to shut him up 😂😂😂

[@oolpearl]

Best response is ignorance and silence. I will not be an emotional pillow to cry on for him any more. It is truly detrimental to my health as I am an Empath. So I chose “no contact” other than kids and work. I have a different day routine to avoid the narc and I am getting happier.

[@SamanthaJoYo]

Yes, and covert narc husbands all act as if they hate gossiping. Mine says it's only a female trait blah blah.... But all he does is gossip and complain.. if he isn't doing that, he is telling me about every single interaction he's had throughout the day so I can hear how amazing he sounded in his verbal exchange.. or telling me all the comments he has made on social media.. or talks at me about things he knows I am not interested in whatsoever but he still forces me to listen to him drone on about his overflow of knowledge on them.. it's non stop talking, unless he's playing a game, I get a reprieve. I don't interrupt him on his game but the moment he is done with it, he needs entertainment again and it doesn't matter if I am reading or doing something whether it's housework or cooking, I'm expected to drop what I'm doing and entertain him. I can't take it.

[@SamanthaJoYo]

Also the repeated story thing is so spot on! He tells me the same stories over and over .... And NOW I've started noticing small changes each time that make him look cooler, or smarter, or just more amazing... And I made the mistake of saying "you've told me this and you said that XYZ happened not that..." And man the retaliation is legendary. He can pretend everything is fine but then finds ways he can strike at me that he can deny... Like cutting the cord to my crockpot. Bending the wires to my hand mixer so they no longer work.... The list goes on.. then he gets super drunk and admits it but then sobers up and says he never admitted it... So now I just smile and nod at his repeated stories that change constantly.

[@yabuzagardens366]

​@SamanthaJoYo I hope you get away from him as soon as possible, safely, gain peace & stability & never look back.

[@JaneDoe-ng3zm]

Why stay married??

[@AmiraVina-cz3xy]

Not only baby crying When the cats sound Loud too. When the mosquitos bite his skin .. So crazy!!

[@ericanemec]

So fragile and whiney. Leave that person just gross.

[@msme7674]

Spot on! Especially "the sigh." Thank you for affirming that I did not imagine it. Please keep your insightful messages coming, Danish.

[@tonipeterson954]

My Narc does a cross between a sigh and a grunt 🙄 ... so I just say "why'd you make that noise?" 😂

[@QuinnMarie222]

Yes. Yes. And YES, experienced all of these things for over 3 decades. Trying to find my own happiness in recovery & Healing.

[@Itzanunnya2019]

YOU are the keeper of your joy and happiness. Dig in, rely on your faith and please locate a strong counselor that specializes in CPSTD. NO CONTACT. Get your feet under you, stand solid and firm. 🙏 💪

[@leerobs1118]

Hi from South Africa. Spot on. Strange that they hate the sounds of their own voice but just love to blab blab and blab... I have found the narc in my life hate the noise of a vacuum cleaner. It's wacky I know But there is something in it for sure 🤯

[@KidCity1985]

Is it your cat?

[@whoami6711]

This resonated so deeply with me. This described my ex so perfectly. Any time either of the kids would start crying he would storm out of in a rage and not come back for days. He was living with his new source while trying to lie to me about it. But I knew. Got to the point he only came by once a week and our 2 yr old would throw a fit after an hour to get him to leave. And the constant need to talk, and talk and fill every bit of silence with his babbling bs. And help me if I laughed around him. He would immediately suck any happiness out of the place. He made sure the kids and I were always miserable. We are so much happier and life is so much better without him.

[@gabim3093]

When I sigh cause I’m a tired mom, my narc says “what’s wrong now? Why are you so negative”

[@yabuzagardens366]

Amazing how they don't even want us to breathe on our own 😂😅🙄😒

[@Corsina]

The sound of an opinion that doesn't put them front, center and correct.

[@Mister_Listener]

I am an abuse survivor and cut off from everybody in my family of origin since 2017. Helpful video, thank you Danish. I think i am handling future narcissists very well… but they end up hating me for not matching their emotional state at all times, like you explain. I had an impossible client last week who was raging, and i noticed that because i did not match her rage, she got more upset, as you discuss in this vid. I worried that i was using my survival skills to diffuse her anger at first, but then manipulating HER and also making her even more angry, because she was “taking the bait.” It wasnt enjoyable at all. But she didnt destroy and flatten me like how i used to fold around antagonistic people, so that part was good. But i am so much happier when people like this are not around.

[@jh9912]

My narcissist didn't like it when I called him by his name. He would get angry. Anyone else notice this?

[@suzanne3669]

YES! He says he hates his name. It makes no sense.

[@nean8160]

Yes mine narc husband too ..I am not supposed to take his name as a mark of respect 😂but once I told his name n he was asking me if I am mad🤣😂🤣😂

[@thelaziestbee]

It triggers some people. Mostly cuz it reminds when you were at school and got into the trouble. Calling by name signifies trouble. Usually nothing good comes after it.

[@fgcewoud]

One of the worst sound is hearing the sound "no". They don't want you having your own thoughts, opinions and beliefs!

[@jilliancesternino5315]

I suppressed my own breath all my life until I finally learned the TRUTH. I used to literally tip toe around SILENT. My psychopath parents did a number on my life. At least I survived. My beautiful brother wasn't so lucky. 😪💔❤️‍🔥🙏

[@semma9727]

Just SMILE and SMIRK, like you know something while staring at them, creates insecurity, curiosity, they hate it.. they feel powerless, they will ask why your smiling, just play dumb and innocent. Depending on the Narc behaviour, don't over do it, .you can even smile when doing dishes, sitting in the car next to them, walking etc, keep smiling and look like you know something they don't, watch them squirm and go crazy.

[@theresabonds7177]

I really like this one! Kinda wish I thought of it myself! ❤️

[@semma9727]

@theresabonds7177 We are here to help each other out, empower one another, and reverse the demonic psychological tactics back on them. NO MERCY.

[@warwinlee1021]

He never wanted me to stare at him. Even a completely brief stare.

[@kellyt4683]

Shoot they are quick to do this too. Then say oh nothing.

[@davidstockton196]

My back neighbor is a malignant vindictive narcissist. I’ll never forget him screaming “SHUT UP !!!” In response to the calls of doves in the trees overhead.

[@yhwhzmyking.4243]

wow.

[@jillgates7172]

Really!? Whoa… that’s extreme !

[@rde4017]

That perfectly shows just how moronic those creatures are.

[@marioalexandramedina8538]

How true about the baby crying to irritate a NPD. In this case my dad , told to me by my mom. In the very cold and snowy winter of 1964 my baby brother of 2 months was constantly crying due to colic into the night. My dad really annoyed that his sleep was being disturbed, picked up my brother, walked outside and put him in a snow bank. Of course my mom was right behind him to get her baby. I was shocked when I heard this, as I am sure all who read it will be also.

[@karolinabunny371]

I feel sorry for Your experiences... My father was same upset when we got sick and wore not atending to school,or seriously pissed when mum got migraines . When I finally split with parents only cat has been lefted to be shouted on . Unfortunately I stay at narcisist flat and this guy shouts on a sighting dog or miauing cat. He is sometimes rageing on cat throwing him even to shower spraying with water so he shut ups... I hope Your life is better now.Wish You all the best 🤗

[@vijayacharya8561]

My maternal Narcissistic grandmother observed me & cousin having fun with each other , my maternal grandmother said you never smile & laugh when you are with us . They obviously suck the energy life force out of it took me 28yrs of age to realize what narcissism is. So many years of my precious i wasted my effort on pleasing such people.

[@TreasureDeal]

Everyone sighs many times a day. My narc jumped on me right away, what was wrong, what was I mad/sad about and on and on. My saying nothing is wrong, not sad or mad. That would send her into a nut. Claiming I was hiding things from her, I was lying. And yes with the laughter. She couldn't ever see the humor in anything and I was simply over acting for attention. I have always sat with crossed legs. I have always wiggled the foot a bit. That also was a trigger to her that I was upset or mad about something. Nope, just the way I have sat my whole life, I was 73 at the time. So I learned to suppress my sighs. Not to laugh, and to really not jiggle my foot I still check to see who's around me when I sigh or laugh. And I still sit with crossed legs but my feet refuse to wiggle, now that does make me sad, have to let it go.

[@aparna1170]

Sadness looming over everybody. They are almost god like. Making others feel what they feel

[@jonstewart5386]

I remember my father criticizing my laugh when I was around 4yo. He would tell me I sounded just like his father, who I was told was basically an asshole. Later I found out my grandpa and father are both narcissists. I rediscovered that laugh again around age 41, after starting therapy. Shout out to Danish, his workshops have been very helpful along with my own therapy.

[@pianoreigns]

They are demons who hate joy.

[@eandsm4620]

Thank you brother! Much needed information. I add one that got to my neighbor. He was on the other side of the fence. I call my cat sometimes by knocking loudly on the storm door. He dropped something and made a grunt noise. Sometimes he is listening to us laughing in our backyard. Must remember to do that more often!!!

[@user-wb1qo6ol4h]

Never thought about this. Makes sense. Gone no contact for 8 years, and they try to push our buttons, but we cut the wires. We now speak indirectly about them and generally about society and what they do in it. We don't personalize it at all. Drives them cuckoo. Fun to watch. STOP CARING. Gone straight for the marrow and psyche.

[@ericacecchini3998]

Hello Danish! You’re such a Genuine Pure heart ❤️ and I appreciate you for all your help and knowledge regarding narcissism. Your so appreciated.🙏

[@TinaNordlund-dz6nu]

As soon as I show some feelings, especially anger, then he rages at me like a demon and making my condition hundred times worse, I hardly can breathe how upset I am, and there´s zero empathy from him, it´s like he´s dictating which kind of feelings ii´m allowed to express, it´s a nightmare ....

[@licksnkicks1166]

I’am constantly walking on egg shells. I am so sick of his shit but I am in no position to leave. To the powers that be pls show some mercy. 😢

[@seameology]

Nope. They don't like babies crying. I just had surgery and I had fifteen staples in my stomach and I wasn't even supposed to be lifting her. I asked him to go get her so I could feed her. Nope. After we were divorced, he said that I never taught him how to be a father.

[@MarisaPaola-um5yb]

When my mother was in a coma and dying, my father started yawning, yawning, saying "well what are we doing, we cant stop or help your mother, its 10pm, i go to bed at 8pm its two hours after my bedtime, then i wont be able to sleep, take me home"...i told him i was staying, my narc sister said she "would do whatever dad wants'..the doctor told us mum only had less than 12 hours to live. Then my father demanded, "either we all go or none of us", i argued that i was staying, they demanded i leave with them, i was talked into go home for four hours. Three hours later we were called and told my mother had died....alone. Then my father started saying 'dont tell anyone we went home, or i will say you wanted it'..he did anyway..i feel so ashamed.. My poor mother would never have left me, i wish i knew about narcissim then.

[@EzoterraTarot]

You are a genius, Sir.

[@malcolmwaddilove1822]

Very good Danish 110 per cent, they despise calm,tranquilo,silence❤

[@HemadriJadaun]

Hello, could you please make your next video about growing up with a narcissistic parent with school pressure or just something around studying and school pressure in general? One of the tough things to deal with is managing school with living with a narcissistic parent.

[@Curious_Crow]

You forget , Sound/music of God prayers . It upset them the most.

[@Spiralclarity]

Because they are possessed. They hate it.

[@jas0204]

But my narc mother always prays to God. In other times she dominates and spreads toxicity . How's that possible

[@Spiralclarity]

@jas0204 I think she might just be showing off? Some of the worst people I have met were fake Christian who read the Bible. The Devil know the Bible too.

[@Curious_Crow]

@@jas0204 Imagine there are 2 gates in brain. If one thinks positive ,god injects ideas and if one is negative , devil injects ideas. If your mother prays to god , then god made her mind that praying is good from long time. Tell her to do meditation. And be as much positive as possible .

[@aloksrivastava7938]

Getting a disneyland dad/mom is far better than a parent who doesn't want to spend a single moment with you (good or bad), despite having all the time in the world. Also, all narcissists hate good music. They tend to like noisy music, with barely discernible lyrics. They play it out loud so that they can annoy others.

[@Zingamazong]

Like Jazz? Give some examples please.

[@starscotten]

​@@ZingamazongJazz? More like heavy metal, especially from ultra-demonic artists like KORN, Marilyn Manson, and more recently Die Antwoord.

[@Zingamazong]

@starscotten What about rap and R&B?

[@daveporter9222]

One of the narcs I have in my life cannot stand the sound of the microwave beeping or any timer going off.

[@world-uk2vj]

Extremely dangerous around children,

[@surv2239]

Chronic Complex Child Hood Trauma PTSD has many of these triggers as well. The crying child is particularly horrific because of other people judging you for not keeping your child perfectly quiet which is on the other person judging the parent who may have been traumatized as a child and left without any compassion. I understand the corporal punishment for making any sounds or trying to put my mind in another place away from the trauma. The silence in conversation for the CCTPTSD survivor usually means there's going to be retribution at any time. Then there's the false compassion that the survivor needs same gender friendship but then the abuser takes over any interaction with them so the survivor looks stupid or crazy and the abuser perfect and saying I tried to give.... The chance and they didn't take it.

[@4everjesusbride]

I just happen to notice this video which highly peaked my interest. Mr. Narcissist Professional, there are not enough lines to write my Encyclopedia Set story. After leaving home, a few decades later I learned that my mom was a Schizophrenic Narcissist +. I figured my dad was too plus Vietnam Vet. My half sister (7 years older than me), wanted nothing to do with me when I was 4 and 5. I would hear her calling me names back then, and it really hurt me even at such a young age. I mean now I get it...she was like 11 and 12. At 3 yrs old, I had the mentality of an innocent grown up! 😂 Picture, if you will, an innocent 3 yr old little girl, in 1973, with our first Pastor visit, from the local Baptist Church just down the road from our home. I assumed later in life (from hearing this so often growing up) I was left unattended, and I came running 90mph down the hall streaking my family and the Pastor's. I was three! 😅 Where was my momma?? She was trying to make a good impression with socializing with company. I always seemed to ruin everything. About the comment above, thinking I was grown at 3, 4, and some 5 was deep socialization with me, myself and I. At 4, I was ready to walk to our church each day to preschool. Ms. Bailey (late) was an amazing preschool teacher I wouldn't have made it through college with a B.S. in Electronic Engineering without your 4 and 5 yr old preschool classes. God's honest truth!!! I didn't get social skills at home. I had an Airedale Puppy to entertain me while I was on the swing in the back yard. Our puppy consistently, knocked me down on the ground. They are the largest of the Terriers. They use to be used for hunting small bears. I hated nap time. I had tto much energy apparently for such pettiness at 4 and 5. So, one day while it was nap time 🥴 I was planning my escape except I learned you should do that without having to speak oit loud the big plan. 😮 Bunk beds next to window where I was going to escape were moved to a new wall. 👍 I do Not remember anything prior to 3 yrs old. A couple of pics one at I believe 18 months and 4 or 5 yrs old. I asked later in life approximately 7 to 9 yrs old where were my baby pictures (esp. momholding baby). I was told they did Not have cameras back then. Folks we're talking 1970. Kodak had the portable back then. I've thought about things over the years and what a messed up family I had no idea who those three people really were my whole life. And, as I write this, I really wonder about a few mischievous possibilities the three coverted to cover themselves from having the burden of any more questions possibly coming up. I've had nothing to do with my "parents" since 3 decades ago because I was always put in the middle every time both or one of my parents had a falling out with my sister. I finally told my mother I've had all I can take of this putting me in the middle of whatever you guys are mad at each other. I ended up growing up to be a people pleaser. Go figure. But the day, day I told my mother politely as possible "no more" for me....I had know idea just how angry the Schizophrenic narcissistic mother was gonna show me. Bam! ⛑️💣📢☎📌📍🧨🧯 We were on the phone. I can only imagine what she was telling the daddy what I said to her! The only other piece of info I really have about me under 3 urs old was from a cousin whom had to be told from my parents and/or his parents the following: "All they knew was my family appeared with mom, dad, 7 yr old child dad never seen, and a baby. And, there was one picture I saw at some point about between 7 to 10 yrs old. There was dad, mom, 7 yr old adopted by new dad and a baby out of thin air. The baby didn't look new born. So, Ive piddled with that info from my cousin for a few years now. But, I am 99% sure there is a whole lot more to that story. Too much. The three family members must be happy with no contact. I tbought I was a lot closer to my sister after I moved out of parents home. But, a few years ago her husband from 2nd marriage threw a shing ding which had me seeing narcissistic ways from him. So, it just happened. My sister and I, no longer talk. He brain washed his family and my ex behind my back of lies about me and my son. I don't care. One of the last things I texted my sister was I had no idea after all these years y'all found me so entertaining. Frankly, I find myself boring and mostly introverted. So, who on God's green earth am I. I am a new 3 yr old looking up of only one night I remember ever being outside and asking in what seemed a soft spoken young tot, "What's that!?" It was nothing I'd seen so so beautiful and sparkly. And, I was persistent asking what it was. Finally, the dad looked up to see what was there. He said, that is a ✨. I never forgot Star. What joy!! I am a lot of things beyond my control. Much about genetically modified generational and warfare chemical diseases. The warfare is children born from a male Vietnam and Korean US Veteran from one up to seven generations. You see we were loosing the Vietnam War so chemicals were created from scientists like Monsanto maker of your weed killer still in use today ROUNDUP. It causes cancer and he has lawasuits. Doesn't stop him. Our gov't, had the SIX COLORS OF BARRELS created with all kinds of chemicals in each barrel with a colored band painted on the outside of it. All of this is on www just do search based on my key words. Monsanto I know created Dioxin for barrels. These barrels were used the entire time of the war. Low flying planes started dumping barrels out and chemials sprayed down like it was fresh rain water. I'm guessing the soldiers couldn't see that there were no clouds and(or so desparate for clean water. Gov't promised high up military that the chemicals would not hurt your soldiers. The rain water would run down the leaves and the soldiers drank it like it was from the freshest streams in the world. The chemicals had no flavor. There mission, to kill vegetation so oir soldiers could see where the enemies were hiding in their dugout tunnels. So, our soldiers defended there country during their 4 yr tour. They came back to the U.S. and many of them developed Prostate Cancer. And, their children after the war very sick from time of birth and if they even lived very long. The soldier's children prior to serving perfectly healthy. Even, the VA opened up publicly after a while. Mr. Bashir, this Introduction (ikr) is Not completed. So, tbc. How the war, years of high doses of Cipro and learning disabilities, the list gets very long. Don't hesitate to give me a chill pill emoji. I'm thankful to fill in gray areas that you explain superbly like assuring me it's not me that has ghosts in the closet. Sincerely, Andrea

[@rebeccareid8730]

I am right there with you Andrea. I was doing all sorts of stuff by myself from 4 years old till now. My dad was career Army and in the chemical corps and he once told me the people in the city next to the base we lived on would be shocked at the things they put in the air. He was a great man. I loved him dearly and my siblings were jealous of the fact I didn’t hate him because they were/are pretentious liberals. He eventually died of lung cancer. It was my mom who I finally realized was the one who didn’t have time or interest in me. I guess I came at a time when she had gotten my sister and brother old enough to take care of themselves and she was the wife of a Lt Col and needed to do her thing. I roamed an army base by myself at 5. I taught myself to read extremely early and I remember practicing writing my name in cursive to get a library card in kindergarten which they told my parents I needed to go to another state to be put into the first grade early. My mom had to take me and we lived with my dad’s mom for a few months and they did not like each other so, that was another strike against my existence. I’ve always been an extreme people pleaser too. I have 4 grown children and that is what I wanted more than anything. They are freaking awesome! Respectful and successful and happy because I fought my husband as much as I could to make them so. He was a musician and so jealous of them. But, he would try to use them against me if I got out of line. The 2 youngest he started to groom with passive aggressive ideas about me when I told him I was done being his “mother”. It still affects my relationship with my third son because he believed it all. My husband died last year and I felt so much lighter and guilty because I did. I loved that man so much but, he left me with so many unresolved lies that he used to torture me with and say I was crazy. He left me with a huge mess he felt no need to help me fix. But, the very early years doing stuff in my own are some of my favorite memories because I was okay by myself and I wasn’t scared to go it alone at 4 years old. I never had any friends really. I was too weird for stupid kids my age. My dad taught me how to converse as an adult and I didn’t fit in with kids. You aren’t alone. I know how you feel. Becky

[@4everjesusbride]

​@@rebeccareid8730 Wow!! 95% of reading about you and family made me feel like I was your family too. We could so be twins!! I honestly do Not know who I was for the first good 24 yrs of my life. Raising, my son, are the very best years of my life. He is so sweet, funny, highly intelligent, and knows his biological father sat on his arss refusing to help with anything because he was playing xbox. My son & I, had the best times doing all kinds of fun stuff. After I divorced his dad, the ex-daddy made the mistake of talking to me very cruel on the phone with him on the speaker. The man knew I was hard of hearing. My son, heard the ex-daddy making wrongful accusations about me. So, my son, had nothing to do with him. When, I divorced his father, it felt so liberating and my life became so much easier. I didn't have to be my ex-husband's do everything for him to include inside house work and outside mowing and weedeating. Cook, clean clothes and dishes. Take care of my son 100%. And, work a stressful full-time job. Thank you so kindly for sharing your personal life with me. I can so relate with much of your childhood. My mom, was constantly off on some distant planet probably due to so many ghosts in her closet. My dad was a non-contact for the most part sexual abuser. And, not that it is an excuse for that, but I read in Vietnam. War paperwork that their commanding officers told the soldier they could do whatever they wanted to with the women and children if you get what i mean. So, sickening!! I hope and pray you can let go of your abusers even the ones no longer here and take small steps discovering new fun things you'd enjoy doing for the first time in getting to know you better. Peace, love & joy~

[@tonipeterson954]

my Narc hated the sound of the kids playing with the orbit tennis (ball on a string on a pole) ... he actually cut the ball off the string ... only a few days after christmas 🙄 ... and then tried to deny it

[@thelaziestbee]

My mum hated me laughing. She wasnt a narcissist, she was depressed.

[@eeyoresgirl55]

@@thelaziestbee 🫂 that has to be so difficult for you. I hope you’re in a better place place now.

[@thelaziestbee]

@eeyoresgirl55 its ok, as a grown up iundertand that people have faults. We have good relationships now, what is amazing.

[@joshuac4087]

Omgosh I have misonphonia and I was so afraid that the sounds you stated would make me a narcissist but you actually helped me a lot with my relationship ❤ thank you so much ❤

[@ragekrgaming5178]

Dear danish pl make a video on how to protect our child of any age from this entire narc family, it will be great relief for many survivors...Thaks from bottom for all support.

[@annjohnson8437]

Yes, please! ❤

[@maricelasalgado86]

I agree!!!

[@KristinaWidmer]

I remember my little baby brother crying in his room. Me being 19 years old and in the other room next to his. He cried, cried, cried. My mother was in the living room. I then couldn't stand it anymore, went into his room and put him in my arms, wanting to calm him down. THEN she would come to us, and take him into her arms... I didn't understand that...

[@2_blAck]

😂You couldn’t show her up, it’s that simple. Narcissist survivor here lol

[@KristinaWidmer]

@2_blAck I don't understand what you mean. I am a survivor too. The situation I described confirms what Danish said and I was worried about my baby brother.

[@sarahm3614]

Between 10yo and 17yo my step mother would cause me to cry in the morning. She told me once that it made her feel better. Sick

[@alyahamzah1952]

I'm so sorry sorry for you. I hope that you are in a better place, that your life is filled with laughter, happines and light. As a human and a paediatric doctor, it sickens me when I hear of kids getting abused mentally or physically, especially by people that are supposed to be their guardians. I experienced the crazy behaviours of a narc in my early adulthood and even now that I'm middle aged, I still am trying to heal. I can't fathom how children have to face these monsters at such tender ages. My prayers and best wishes go out to you.

[@sarahm3614]

@@alyahamzah1952 Thank you. It sickens me as well. I am finally in a better place.

[@Spiralclarity]

That's sick and evil. My goodness what on earth? She must have been a malignant narcissist. I have one hanging around the perimeter of my life. He's stalking me and loves to cause pain . I decided not to react. There's something broken in them. 😢

[@sarahm3614]

@@Spiralclarity I agree.

[@ClaudetteD-h9e]

Everything is accurate when I refer to my narcissist mother. Incredible

[@abdulwahabsufyan5939]

There isn't a moment of silence when my Parents and brother are in the same room. They keep talking without a pause ⏸️. They also keep asking questions again and again like a 5 year old does.

[@TMoniq]

Their soul is restless and empty. They constantly talk without taking a sip of water or a deep breath. The questions are interrogative as if they want to know what you're thinking at that moment.

[@vcastro7990]

​@@TMoniqmay we all have peace , may we all ESCAPE !!!!!

[@vcastro7990]

Yesss !!! Omgg samw with my ex boyfriend , non stop takimg , self centeredness, never wonder about ANYONE else's feelings, his family warned me not to date him but i thought they were toxic !!! They were just trying to PROTECT me !!! Unbelievable you couldnt make that up .. i hope u get peace 🎉❤

[@abdulwahabsufyan5939]

@@vcastro7990 Gotta give props to his family for being honest

[@TMoniq]

@@abdulwahabsufyan5939 Yup! It's annoying and done on purpose but in all actuality they have a mental disorder once you really understand what's been going on and why. They love to annoy you and watch you become irritated. One guy I told, "You are so annoying just like a child" and he said, "No! You're just annoyed" it was a stupid back and forth and it turned me off so bad.

[@kellyt4683]

The gibberish talking and then when it gets quiet the, “you’re not keeping up your end of the conversation.”. Absolutely exhausting.

[@larenwarlitner3400]

Brilliant.. Spot on

[@prophet1782]

There are cases where partners have hurt babies severely . Even some mothers.

[@karenbradt513]

Wow, I missed this one. Mine used to comment on my sighing and facial expressions all the time 😂 Good for me, aggravated him without even realizing it😂

[@peachesmcgee4795]

Thank you for mentioning us traumatised people and sound sensitivity.

[@jillgates7172]

Yes yes yes… always filling the silence was obvious in my former spouse. The sounds of anything that was uplifting and made me happy.. country music, conversations about my fulfilling activities or other friends. He shut down or directed the conversations back to him and what I wasn’t doing. I was so susceptible to this for years 😮 not anymore. 🎉

[@mamagrizzly5360]

Another sound that triggers them is "NO"

[@zandatee]

I am touched by your warm empathy around min5. I witnessed when I suddenly came to mothers house who is playing the best grandmother to get conrol in my brothers family and get narc resource from children - my niece crying just so desperatly (she had got an infection in her eye that day) and my mother-her grandmother ignoring her doing some things in another room. It was just so shocking contrast with the public image she is making, specially to little girls mother.

[@Mammabear7]

Yawning and the blinker noise on the car weren’t allowed for me. Major triggers.

[@jo-anblanchet-girard5488]

My husband often scream at our baby to shut up, slap the door and go sleep in the living room instead of trying to find out why he cries in the middle of the night. So I almost don't sleep because I have to take care of the baby.

[@ia02]

Mine didn't go to the living room, instead he asked me to leave with the baby to living room. So sad anyways.

[@etaokha4164]

They can't stand a child crying, rain, radio, nature sounds, lullaby sounds, hissing, kissing your teeth at them, playing in the house and shouting and a peaceful environment triggers them and lastly laughing loudly

[@Samali-l53]

When you sing,they go nuts!

[@bleelee4566]

This is a fantastic topic. Thanks so much for bringing it up. It has answered not only a lot of questions from my childhood why certain things happened when they did (obviously the sounds triggered it. I. Our case it was always laughter or crying which the narcissist couldn't stand) but also something a narcissistic colleague kept doing recently. If the whole office of 50 people was working silently he would start mumbling or singing just loud enough for everyone to hear and he would keep it up all day. And no one of us 48 had the guts to tell him to shut up! Just realised it was because he was uncomfortable because obviously he was not working.

[@mleecthulhu]

Silence does wonders, too! 😊

[@christinav3383]

Your topic is very interesting and unique, Thank you. Yes they’re all show and no go with the children. I was getting up every four hours and he just watched tv while I had to feed the child through the night. At night he would chase any sound in the house. He searched the house until he found where the sound came from. Mine did not speak a single word in 20 years of marriage. If I asked him anything he answered NO! I returned his silence and his NO without a single word. I went no contact for for life.

[@Dr.ShaziaHanif-f8l]

Very informative respected Sir!

[@andreadenisemolina]

Danish you got me through my breakup thanks for all your content🎉😊

[@lauracengelmagen6379]

I was told that the infertility my ex and I experienced was a blessing to the poor potential baby and me because of this. Also when my ex saw me sad, starting to cry etc. they told me to PLEASE take it to the other room because I was “being a buzz kill.”

[@juliet3813]

My mother ignored my discharging ear infection for over a year. My pillow was a mess in the mornings was vile rotten soft cheese green pus and at night I slept on the dried excretions. By the time I finally got to see a doctor it needed three modified mastiodetomys ( please excuse my spelling) to fix the mess. I half deaf as you can imagine.

[@Spiralclarity]

So sorry for everything you've gone through. That's just awful. Shame on her. ❤

[@vcastro7990]

Im so sorry 😢😢😢😢

[@Spiralclarity]

@@juliet3813 oh my goodness!!! That's just seriously abuse 😭! She's evil! I know how bad ear infections can 🤕 hurt. I had so many. That sounds like torture!! 😭. 😨. I hope you're in a better place today.💛. You didn't deserve it and I wish you happiness.

[@angeladowden4535]

My narc husband could not stand me singing, even though I CAN sing. He couldn't stand me being happy. We went to counselling over it & our counsellor couldn't understand why I couldn't just sing when he was not in the house. I told her I sing when I FEEL like it NOT to a timetable. He also couldn't stand children's happy babbling, he HAD to hear the news or he would slam a piece of quad wood on the table & demand QUIET, then my daughter would vomit up her meal Another narc partner was severely triggered by lovely windchimes & ENYA singing

[@elisadelaurenti2516]

I forgot about the deep sighs! Dangit, I need to work those back into my routine, somewhere between crying and laughing. 😅

[@patriciswilson9193]

I felt very enlightened by your commentary about mood synchronicity. Thank you for another great video

[@kariroderick2856]

My ex narcissistic husband shook our first born son when he was only a few weeks old

[@sammiebob1649]

Your videos saved my life just wanted you to know. Thank you for sharing so others may heal. ❤

[@pamelamax9443]

I record my narc's tantrums and he will not listen to them. He says "I don't want to hear that"- yea well neither did I.

[@Luja2024]

When I cried I heard the phrase:if You don't stop I'll give You a reason to cry.After our father beated us my mum said You were bad that's why Your father beated You.Not beeing beaten Was the badest thing (just wrong enough) but the words told after are verry painful.

[@xywang21]

Thanks!

[@Emberedits2013]

Oh my god. This is EXACTLY what my children's father is like. He's a living, life sucking nightmare!

[@AfricanAussie]

My husband cannot stand loud chatter and laughing at a busy restaurant and he threatened to start screaming. I told him that if he did that, I would walk out

[@Libra22-10]

3:49 This is so true and challenging..

[@marysweeney486]

My 1st husband use to get bugged when our kids were playing and laughing in the background even when they were upstairs, which helped me know they were happy and ok

[@marysweeney486]

You really get the real behavior in real time

[@anoodalziyadi4684]

God bless you thankyou for sharing this ❤ it really helps healing and moving forward after dealing with narcissist

[@cletiawilliams1436]

💯💯💯💥Great video! Explains my narc older brother.

[@cefcat5733]

NOW you are scaring me. I sighed on the phone yesterday and my someone flew into an emotional thing. Oh my. Help. I am sighing, just having a bad cold. Meaningless. The caller applied the sigh, to their abilities, or rather lack of success in a certain situation. This is too much for me. Narcissists in every closet? I am not used to this but, I told them that any noise I make is not a comment designed to hurt anyone. 😢I know all of these things too well. I was not allowed to finish my sentences and began to answer posed questions, being told that I am interrupting. I said, ‚You asked.‘ I had thought that the person had paused for me to answer. I hate this stuff. This is a bad surprise to me. Why is this person so insecure, despite their true achievements? Are they never fulfilled?😢

[@shaheenkhan5174]

Hi Brother Danish! Love your vlogs! Thank you so much for sharing and explaining! Love the way you explain! Yes it so true and experience that! Thanks for your helpful tips! My life is so good because your videos helps me a lot! Thanks again! Take care!❤

[@NickeyVamp]

All of the above describes my ex. Especially the sunglasses.. dark mirrored sunglasses. He wears them all the time, daytime, nighttime almost 24/7, he used them to check out other women in public without me noticing. I could still see his eyes. He eventually admitted this but he told me he needed to look at women younger and more attractive.. probably the most truthful thing in his eyes that he said while with me. Gross. All of those resonate, though. Thank you, Danish, for your help once again. Much ❤

[@trishc7828]

brilliant!! thank you for the insights

[@IzabelaWaniek-i1x]

Yes, I have noticed it as well. Thank you Danish.

[@angeldee7287]

Hi Danish ❤ that sigh is a sign to initiate round 2 I hope you’re well Danish. Thank you again and again for your support. Love U! ❤😊 ps. Every one of them are spot on. Take care 😊

[@killamaita]

i have the same thing about the laughing i guess because i was bullied in school

[@MelanieWard-ni1em]

When i was a teenager I remeber laughing and my narc dad saying why are you laughing like it was a crime to laugh

[@Phillyphysi]

Excellent❤