This Single Word Will Give You Back Your Life

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One of the hardest things to do in life is to say “No.”
To invitations, to requests, to obligations, to the stuff that everyone else is doing. All of us regularly say yes unthinkingly, or out of vague attraction, or out of greed or vanity, or out of fear of disappointing a friend or acquaintance. Because we can’t say no-because we might miss out on something if we did. We think “yes” will let us accomplish more, will give us more of what we want, when in reality it prevents exactly what we seek. All of us waste precious life doing things we don’t like, to prove ourselves to people we don’t respect, and to get things we don’t want.
You can only hand so many hours of your day over to other people before there is none left. Even if there are some left, you may have lost the clarity, the energy and the capacity to do anything with them. So, next time someone is asking for just a little of your time, or you feel the pressures of minor social obligations, or the temptations of potential financial gain-remind yourself of this advice from the Stoics.
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[@Tzippi]

I said, “no” to taking on more work because they are working me to death. When it was time for merit pay, I did not get a dime because I said “no.” So, I’m pulling a Ryan, and I’m quitting that job, moving to a small town, and starting at a place that values my personal time, and not treat me as a research slug. Thank you, Ryan! Living is paramount!

[@Tzippi]

Literally, my life for the past six years has been the following: waking up, feeding the cat, making tea, turning on 20 computers, sitting in front of those computers for 8 to 12 hours a day. For forgetting to eat, not going in anywhere or leaving the house for days at a time. And I just said no. No days off because if I do take a day off, then I’m completely totally behind and it takes me two days to catch up. I’m almost 56 and I’m about to go and live my life.

[@ypramodya]

Same here😊

[@sinsin7655]

Learn to say no and learn to take no

[@aaronison4751]

Sadly I discovered Stoicism later in life and since then I have been diagnosed with Parkinsons disease at age 50.The consequences of this have been enormous. However by studying Stoicism and the works of the great Stoic philosophers, I am moving forward. Thank you to everyone at the Daily Stoic for your help in interpreting these ideas. In my case the obstacle really has become the way.

[@beaujackson445]

"But the tyrant will chain--- What? Your leg. But he will cut off--- What? Your neck. What, then, will he neither chain nor cut off? Your moral purpose" - Epictetus

[@cryptocritic4879]

Look into the carnivore diet, and B vitamin deficiencies. It may be possible to reduce inflammation to reduce symptoms of Parkinson's. I wish you the best of luck. "Deficiencies of B12, which are more common in people with Parkinson's than the age-matched general population, are associated with weakness, tiredness, numbness, tingling and walking difficulties - symptoms that are found in Parkinson's disease."

[@loveme77527]

Seneca, "How to Die" is a great read also... Stoicism changed my life too last year, I'm glad it found a way to you...🙏

[@heczrivz2390]

God led me to stoicism and it changed my life. I no longer suffer when those lows in life happen. I see everything differently and it led me to feel peace and in control in every situation that gets in my way. What stands in the way becomes the way!

[@ronanmcadam7251]

Don't call Ryan God, he might start to believe it 😂😂

[@badmiddens]

@@ronanmcadam7251 the response was unclear. he didn't mention which god led him. I think he may have meant, Google led him to stoicism...

[@badmiddens]

Yeah, finally god got around to reading Ryan's books.

[@curanderoverde]

God is only in your head unless you are talking about Zeus

[@realtyler9119]

The Bible’s most important and most expounded upon lesson is stoicism. There it’s called faith!.. Philosophy just has a way with words. Maybe we understand and accept it more willingly knowing that these concrete breathing historical figures could apply it in a not so far time.

[@georgiafrancis9059]

"NO" has always been my favorite word.

[@elflakeador09]

To be honest I've don't have a problem saying No. The older I get I couldn't care less what people think .

[@ceeemm1901]

Saying "no" is only a problem when you feel a debt is owed to you. Saying "yes" 'unconditionally" will not cause resentment. Saying "no" is only half of life. Learning to accept "no" from someone else is the other.

[@mcgritty8842]

You must live in a world full of manipulation… I say no to whatever I want and I feel nothing is owned to me, EVER

[@therichbuddha3277]

Read a book in college that first introduced this concept to me, called, When I Say No, I Feel Guilty.

[@franklinhopkinsjr1065]

I finished Ryan’s book on Ego and now I am reading his book on Courage. At 61 to live the life I dream of, I need to up my courage. Thank you Ryan for your contribution to my life. And for teaching me to be more aware of my fleeting time…

[@McAdamsMechanics]

Talking about "no" Ive found on my journey through stoicism is that if youre blunt and honest with people, they may get that shock value but at the end of that moment they will respect you more and listen to you more. You have taken the role of authority even if that is not your primary. In my other job I have to make life or death decisions in the medical field and in medicine some people can really beat around the bush. Finding stoicism, I am direct and blunt because feelings have no room in an emergent situation where the wring decision could cost someone their life or seriously put someone at a disposition. I work with a lot of bush-beaters (focus.. focus!) And Ive found my direct honesty and bluntness has really excelled the quality of care and respect that enters the situatuon.

[@nyalimuir4103]

AMEN! KUDOS to your directness. This brings to mind my closest friend who unexpectedly died 3 weeks ago (not old) . Something we shared was directness, being respectfully blunt. I loved it so, that I gave her a nickname for it. It's absolutely a strength 💪 🙏 ❤️

[@SuitedPup]

We need to learn to say no to ourselves more too: no to the junk food, to the late night KZbin comments heh, the vices, the avoidant behaviors, the procrastinating, etc etc

[@klf153]

Absolutely! I was going to make the same comment till I saw yours. Thx.

[@SamoaBeast510]

Robert Greene talked about you in his book Daily Laws. Currently reading it now. Thought it was cool. I was like “I know that guy Ryan Holiday”. Thanks for your support with Robert. That was cool.

[@darla2142]

I have no problem saying No, people just don't want to hear it.

[@marygrogan6101]

Thank you. Glad I found you a while back.

[@basilnapak4803]

Stoicism to the 🌕 , daily inspirational meditation of living a life of temperance, resilience inspired by Marcus Aurelius. I didn't understand stoicism one year ago, i remember last year i had watch a documentary of the rise and fall of Roman Empire and it really lays a foundation of me venturing to know more about Roman empire, its social institutions and philosophy , luckily enough i just met Ryan holiday in sportify and straight forward subscribed to his podcast and in each of his daily meditation he will always mention Marcus and Seneca , and i connected those 2 philosopers that i had just seen them in a documentary, stoicism is a life teaching and long lasting treasure to grasp. Mob love Ryan Holiday from East Africa.

[@philparisi9175]

So timely and on point for me. I have a dog care/hike/walking business. 20 years in April. I still have 5 clients that I obtained 20 years ago (we are all on our 3rd dog together). I now operate solely on client referrals and yet I am still overwhelmed with the amount of work. I recently had to stop working in an area and had to separate from a number of clients in a certain location. I had a near nervous breakdown and felt immense sadness at leaving these dogs behind ( I really love most of the dogs!). It will make everything much more possible now without going insane, but so hard to let them go. I feel a real sadness out of it. I have to get better or more comfortable with saying no.

[@larskoch6907]

Good on you. I'm many years older than you. I'm inspired. I was a Philosophy major. I loved the Stoics in high school. I lost may way, somewhat. I'm inspired by your KZbin channel, I struggle to re-connect. I don't know why. Somewhere between jaded and hopeful I am.

[@checkN8]

My first word was NO. 😊

[@Atlassian.]

I think mine was tweezers

[@SootyPhoenix]

Mine was pseudopseudohypoparathyroidism.

[@iloveyellow7214]

This video made me evaluate my current situation in life. Goodness, it made me evaluate people. People worth spending time to and people who arent. But then again, as someone said, "if it doesnt hurt? You're not progressing enough" Thank you for sharing this

[@einarrull]

If you have boundaries, you also will be more sensitive to other people's boundaries. Everybody wins.

[@mcgritty8842]

You nailed it. By sayinf no, you’re respecting yourself and in turn you’ll have more respect/understanding for others when they say no

[@FolkBoyify]

I knew exactly what word you meant, because it is the hardest word to say for some people at times, especially me❤

[@LennefalkStudios]

Saying no and protecting your time definitely becomes key once people start wanting your attention, prioritization is the foundation! 🌄

[@effay83]

I wish I'd known this before and had the wisdom Ryan had. Listen to him young fellows. Have a strong moral compass and say No.

[@squirrelflow5781]

I would just like to say how Grateful I am for all of you in this community and Ryan himself. I suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder and this time of year can be a challenge for me. These videos and practices show me the challenge itself is the way. I know now that I am not alone in my struggles, but with a community of uplifting individuals trying to do their very best by society , man it makes this journey a whole lot easier. 💚💜💜💜💚💚💚💜💜💚💚

[@jaredpalanzi330]

Get some sunlight & exercise.

[@squirrelflow5781]

@@jaredpalanzi330 Have started those habits this month and have been keeping up with them. Exercise helps IMMENSELY with my mental health. Thank you my brother.

[@mcgritty8842]

Homie, you stressing yourself out. Seasons are natural and you wanna fight that? You need to take a good look in the mirror dude and stop making up terms with the populace so yall don’t feel like such lazy people

[@SeyoumAlemayehu-uo1kg]

Man he lives in the library ,i love that🎉

[@cmleibenguth]

Equally important -- being able to accept no as an answer

[@StoicEvolution1]

"Wealth consists not in having great possessions, but in having few wants." - Epictetus

[@justinwest5166]

saying no or yes leaves an opportunity cost for something else and thus each decision should be thought on and not just impulses

[@brandenvs]

Always a privilage hearing from you, thank you for the video.

[@Endeavor545]

I don’t take a piss without getting paid is my new motto!

[@georgiafrancis9059]

Hi Ryan, I open your email first and then on to Daily Stoic ----- MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITE ---- also love your ❤ books ❤ I've learned so much. 💯

[@tonygolledge7906]

I would think that one would have to watch how far he or she went to saying No. For this could lead to one being a self seeker and the greater good of humanity. I don’t believe lies in everyone being like Have a nice day.

[@Rabidwolverinehandler]

Disable your comments , say no to all of our pointless questions . Practice what you preach, disable comments we are nothing compared to your genius

[@georgeforall]

Also, when you say yes to everyone, it devalues your reputation and respectability. Imagine if you slept with everyone that asked you?

[@muhammadnoorsy]

yhanks man

[@Clammyclams]

To say no is to know.

[@ThingsThatIDo]

Harry Truman, a true Missourian

[@jovanjones4275]

No, thank you. DASRAM

[@InspiredbyIda]

I wish you’d referenced Greg Mckeown in this video.

[@365InnerPeace]

"you have power over your mind- not outside events. Relize this, and you will find strength"_Marcus Aurelius

[@miguelangelous]

3:18 A freer experience in life is possible

[@Yay_you]

How about being as simple as, 'you're thinking about going, just go. If you're not having a good time, leave." No need for all the views, opinions, and guessing what another is thinking and feeling because we really we have no idea. But that's just me😉🤜🏼🤛🏽 #stoicism #compassion

[@justinduffer9500]

This isnt the first time Ive seen Holiday in a Maiden shirt. I wonder what his favorite tracks / albums are.

[@mcgritty8842]

He’a a huge fan!

[@McAdamsMechanics]

The word is: Fig

[@sjs133]

Are there plans to put The Daily Pressfield on Audible?

[@FuHackers-wx9lq]

The hardest...

[@ronanmcadam7251]

Sorry, seems to be the hardest word. As the song goes 😊

[@mcgritty8842]

Sorry is easy to say if you’re authentic and mean it. No is usually a form of you standing up for what you believe in. If you keep saying yes, everything will be taken from you

[@toburshabasumatary5384]

What do you regat

[@TheStoicJourney86]

What's the word that transformed your life? Let's create a viral discussion. Comment your empowering word or tag someone seeking inspiration!

[@mcgritty8842]

Discipline.

[@naturalnia432]

Simplify

[@daanschone1548]

One word hasn't got a lot of meaning without context.

[@ihikefar]

Disappointed. Signed up for the Daily Stoic email list and the first email was a short article hawking daily stoic jewelry medallions at your online store. Dude WTF? Unsubscribed……

[@amentv3759]

❤

[@denismaftei691]

you dont put soul in what you do you just manipulate

[@jonjrambo3546]

You speak a lot , without saying anything at all.

[@mcgritty8842]

You must not be paying attention… clean your eyese and open your eears

[@510tuber]

Well, the thing is, he's giving overall ideas - not getting down into practical specifics. It's up to you to take these ideas and apply them to the specific variables of your own life. You know what the main focus of your current life should be, and you know what's distracting you from those things. You can find specific practical ways to say "no” to limit some of those distractions. Or to create your own strategies to remind yourself to get into that habit. Sometimes people just need a video giving an overall idea with an added sense of motivation. Not everything needs to be spoon-fed specifics.

[@muridoctor]

Im not going to subscribe to your emails. You don’t reply them. Jk! Thanks for this one.

[@loriolson3191]

I do like many of the ideals of the stoics but as a woman working in a male dominate government workplace your advice from the stoic philosophy sounds great but doesn't work well in actual practice. Not answering an email? That would get a person like me written up. Not caring what others think would cost me my job. Sometimes a job is not perfect but by staying in it and making a difference and supporting your family is doing the right thing too. I see so many men get away with the "I don't give a F*** attitude and the women picking up the slack. I started out really getting inspired by the Stoic philosophy but now you make it seem a bit like white male privilege philosophy. Sadly have to stop following you.

[@daanschone1548]

I'm not a huge fan of Ryan Holiday myself. The popular modern version of stoicism seems to miss some important points of the ancient version. And yes, the ancient version was written down in a time that patriarchy was way more normative than now. If you read Seneca he writes about women as if they are unable to reason more than animals. But this is ancient Rome and you can take what is valuable and discard what is ancient. The point here I think is that it is important to focus on what is essential. It seems that answering that email for you is essential. We can't control the external situation we find ourselves in, only how we respond. You are in a patriarchy, you can't change that. What you can do is stay virtuous and do what is right.

[@daanschone1548]

Some practical advice. Read "never split the difference" from Chriss Voss

[@HealthyMBS1]

Say No to the Rams. Yes to the 49ers.

[@urunconsciousMind]

Stoicism is the Worst Philosophy to Live by Trust'

[@DeanDewnuffun]

Trust... whom? Trust what?

[@beaujackson445]

​​@@DeanDewnuffunHis words are an external. We can't control them, but we can control our response. We should respond with virtue. Wisdom: we've applied it and found what is under our control. Justice: if we said something others didn't agree with, how would we want others to respond to us? Personally, I would want them to agree to disagree, so here I will agree to disagree with Blazen. Temperance: is the above an extreme solution? No. It is neither cruel nor spineless. Courage: do the right thing. The rest doesn't matter.

[@beaujackson445]

I respectfully agree to disagree, sir.

[@PabeLg91]

Pretty sure he’s joking, guys.

[@vannix]

I used to appreciate Ryan’s uploads but nowadays they are just repetitive and way too frequent that it lose its value.

[@OtakuOG]

Thanks Ryan for your help! I am grateful to have discovered Stoicism thanks to you!