TikTok's Worst Trans 'Creator' - Lily Tino

[@mr.fn.brownstone]

"Trans girl does [x and y]" is unintentionally one of the best jokes ever

[@Dankyjabo]

HOLY SHIT YOU'RE A GENIUS

[@parakodraws]

it took me a while to get but omg 😭

[@mariahthebee06]

😂😂😂

[@Odd_artist..]

HI PARAKO UR REALLYS DCOOL!!!!​@@parakodraws

[@grey.themusiccat]

BAHAHAH I JUST REALISED😭

[@Suzy24]

That Kurt Cobain clip genuinely angered me, just because he’s dead doesn’t mean it isn’t disrespectful

[@destineedavis4937]

the fact he's dead and how he died in my opinion makes it more disrespectful

[@spiceupyourafterlife]

It also shows how little she really knows about Kurt Cobain because she says that he "didn't have the language for what they were" when he absolutely would have because Cobain was an outspoken ally to the LGBTQ+ community and frequently hung out with them.

[@itsjuskae]

i love kurt, his voice and js everything is so amazing and he was an amazing person and im sorry but i make a few jokes here and there-

[@RayRayDoesStuff]

I think about that lady boxer at the Olympics and how people were trying to say she was trans but she absolutely was not. That's super harmful. I don't see how her remarks on Kurt Cobain are better at all. Both are very disrespectful imo.

[@taylorfawn2012]

idk how she doesn’t understand that we just… shouldn’t speculate on someone’s gender identity, especially PUBLICLY, regardless of whether they’re alive or deceased.

[@dasani.like.the.water.]

I think it’s absolutely ridiculous Lily said Cobain’s suicide was due to gender dysphoria. I mean he was depressed and addiction to H. As someone who also struggles with mental illness and H addiction (I’m clean now). I think it’s safe to say those are the reasons.

[@ampie7096]

Congratulations on being clean woohoo 🎉

[@hopeadler507]

That made me genuinely gasp when I saw that clip the first time.

[@felixcatux]

im so proud of you for getting clean, man 🙏

[@ewetn1]

Cobain also suffered from a very painful stomach condition that doctors couldn't diagnose or treat. That contributed to his H use, since it alleviated the pain. He was dealing with a lot of pain, physical, mental, and emotional.....

[@ID0STUFFBRUV]

Good job at being clean! 👍

[@tessbradley13]

Lilly: getting people fired for misgendering them. Lilly again: misgenders Kurt Cobain on speculation.

[@najadahmer4862]

The hypocrisy is strong with this one..

[@erinray3038]

@@tessbradley13 right....delulu needs a ward..ASAP

[@drinkyinthesand]

As a trans person i think its harmful to the community to boil being trans down to what clothes you wear or what toys you played with as a kid.

[@222mars]

I agree, this is coming from a nonbinary person

[@madisonlewe1057]

My brother and I were close in age and grew up with not a whole lot of money so you bet I played with cars just as much as he played with dolls and we’re both straight, CISgendered individuals.

[@capybar00]

vouch !! saying as a transmasc nonbinary person.

[@breauseph]

Hard agree (from another trans person). And all kids - ALL kids - go through a normal developmental stage of gender experimentation that usually ends in a cisgender identity, even if that identity doesn't align with gendered stereotypes. Holding kids to that one developmental period is a gross overstep.

[@TheSpiderInUrWalls]

Yeah. I’m not trans because I had dinosaurs instead of dolls. I liked dinosaurs more. So what? You can’t just tell someone they’re trans, no more than you can tell someone they’re cis. That’s not how it works

[@trashboi9660]

as a trans person i think its really disrespectful to talk about kurt like that. the way she talked about him also invalidates gender nonconforming men, he can dress differently or in women's clothing without being a trans woman. he isnt alive to speak on it and we should respect that. it really not anyones business to speculate on a dead man's gender.

[@AbdulQaribImam-q3r]

WOMP WOMP TO THE WOMPIEST WOMP TO THE F****** WOMP

[@donaldotrumpo828]

*he

[@icarusmoore452]

@@donaldotrumpo828what?

[@johnpaul4435]

@@icarusmoore452 its a man with a dick

[@Spamhard]

I also hate those takes. It's like when harry styles did a photo shoot wearing a dress and everyone was speculating he's gay/bi. And it's like or... maybe. He's just a dude who wants to wear whatever he wants to wear. It seems like our community is so desperate for people to express themselves and being gender nonconforming, but the second they do, there's a scramble to put a label on them. I'm a cis woman but very masc/non conforming (basically 'butch'), and I've frequently had people call me an "egg" or try to claim I'm a trans guy or nb, and they don't even seem to realise the irony in what they're doing.

[@notpodge]

Using they/them pronouns for Kurt Cobain is actually so obnoxious what

[@lookilookibuthearingtooi]

I think it's rage baiting.

[@youknowthedrill2164]

u acting like people dont misgender women as dude and guys all the time

[@TeeHeeTwinkleToes]

​@youknowthedrill2164 not misgendering, it's referring because "dude" can be universal, same with "guys"

[@MushyYGO]

@@lookilookibuthearingtooi It most likely is. In fact most of her videos are probably ragebait to transphobes, which drives interaction to her and makes M O N E Y.

[@froots2729]

As a trans person that works in a restaurant.. I misgender cis people and it happens, we have an awkward fast laugh about it and we move on. I don't even look at people in the face when I'm really busy during work, she's doing too much

[@justkittensbeingkittens5892]

Sorta irrelevant, but I’m uninformed. Is saying “I couldn’t tell you’re trans” a compliment on looking like your gender or an insult implying that you’re not a real man/woman. I just wanna know for the future bc I don’t wanna accidentally insult someone

[@froots2729]

@@justkittensbeingkittens5892 it's ok to ask! If you have any questions I would love to try and explain! Saying "I couldn't tell you're trans" is fine by default for most trans people, but most people will add "you look like a REAL man/woman" or "you don't look like a woman/man" to a trans man/woman and that's the bad part where trans people could be "😐" like not looking like your AGSB(assigned gender as birth) it's most of the time the whole point. If you mean it well(only the first part, not the adding sentences) then it's ok🫶

[@GetElevatedWithMe]

@@froots2729you’re so kind taking the time to explain to people ❤❤❤❤ thank you. I know that you helped people ❤❤❤

[@vivianchairez955]

He

[@froots2729]

@@vivianchairez955 like your mom

[@Barbie.Q]

20:30 I think what they meant is the early signs of being transgender, i agree that 4 year olds understand gender because they are always split up between boy and girl, if your child comes up to you and says "i dont like boy clothes" you can say "okay, lets try some different clothes." not "youre transgender." because not only is that confusing for the child who can even read yet, its also 90% of the time just not the outcome. I knew I felt different since i was 8, but it wasnt "i dont like these clothes" it was me feeling self conscious of my changing body. a lot of kids find out when theyre going through puberty, you shouldnt jump to the term as soon as your child decides their favorite color isnt pink anymore. and not even when they say they dont like their body, listen to them but let them find out the term by themselves or when theyre old enough to understand.

[@lookilookibuthearingtooi]

This pink thingy is so american. Unfortunately we see it here in Germany, too now. Girls being dressed in pink from head to toe. I always find that horrible. I don't remember a single child at school who would say their favourite color was pink. Just a "fun" fact since you mentioned it. I think girls, especially in America, got really sold that stuff and trapped into making it all about one color. Life is colorful. Not pink.

[@jasper8293]

An addition to your commentary on Kurt Cobain- it's ALSO a discredit to the queer and trans community! It's so important to let people explore presentation, and people have been working so hard to prove that gender expression does not equal gender identity, being trans is such a complex and personal experience so boiling it down to "they like dresses so they're trans" practically undoes YEARS of work on getting people to accept others presenting in ways other than what is expected. You can be a man and like dresses. It's just a peice of fabric. Seeing rock stars go against the grain and present femininely did so much work to break down the idea of how you have to present to be a "real man".

[@78jujubs]

Exactly, presenting a certain way doesn't equate somebody's gender. If a man wears a dress, the only thing that means is that he likes to wear dresses, not his gender ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[@kittysoftpaws3677]

I like wearing mens clothes. Obviously i must be trans. Duh. It only makes sense. /sarcasm

[@frogblehfrog143]

EXACTLY! This stuff is so harmful to butch lesbians (masculine lesbians)! butch lesbians are basically now seen as non binary or trans men in the closet and it's so harmful

[@cocoexists]

well said, this was my favorite portion of the video because CLOTHES ARE NEUTRAL! Subject of the video focuses WAY too much on the binary and completely undermines the entire spectrum of presentation and everything that goes with it.

[@NJ.Magpie]

Agreed. Clothes have no gender. This is something that the trans community has been trying to say for years and it seems like she still has a lot of internalised sexism to to constantly categorise what is trans. This is a really toxic way of thinking because it really undermines what the trans community stands for. I stopped identifying as genderfluid and then turned to genderqueerness because it worked better for my identity, as when I was genderfluid I started categorising when I felt feminine and when I felt masculine. I always found it difficult how genderfluid people could tell when they felt like a specific gender and it caused me to fall into a toxic way of viewing it as I was categorising what was male and female, so thankfully I soon realised this and now I am comfortable identifying as genderqueer. And if you are genderqueer, it is a bit like non binary where you identify as outside of the gender binary, but it has that political side of it so you don't necessarily have to identify as trans to be genderqueer.

[@ashleysimon3607]

Take a shot everytime she says "it's like a knife to the heart"

[@_huntr.dale_]

Bet

[@s.g2634]

But I only have the one liver, friend 😢

[@lilacheart_]

@@s.g2634i believe that is the regular amount of livers to have 😅

[@s.g2634]

@@lilacheart_ 🙈 I know. But I really really appreciate your concern for my well-being.

[@s.g2634]

The joke was: she says it so much that if I took a shot every time she said her catchphrase, my lonely liver would cease to function.

[@apprehensiveyeehaw]

1:02:00 trans guy here. slight correction, trans people can and do have children. Some trans men are able to stop testosterone long enough to carry a child, and while estrogen does seriously decrease sperm counts, many trans women freeze their sperm before starting HRT so the option of having children is still open in the future. Yes uterine transplants are VERY unlikely but trans people having kids in general is not impossible.

[@jujubeaniebabby]

thank you for saying this. i’m honestly baffled that more people don’t know this and was taken aback when he said that lol.

[@Umbra_Dux]

As a trans masc person this very much, some trans men get pregnant before stopping testosterone because the body still ...well has eggs and a uterus(unless they've been removed ofc) it's why my doctor has always told me that even if I'm 5 years on testosterone pregnancy is still possible and I need to use contraceptives if I have sex with someone who can get me pregnant

[@seajaill]

also it's really weird that she describes being trans as just wearing "other gender" clothes? i'm a woman but i HATE dresses and skirts because i find them uncomfortable. they usually don't have pockets, horrible when you want to sit and you have to be careful not to show your underwear. that doesn't make me trans! wtf and i describe myself as somewhat a futch lesbian lol

[@LOREisDEAD]

Exactly. Like, I'm mascfluid and I didn't wear skirts for the longest time because they get on my nerves (the school ones are just so cheap) but now, I wear some skirts now. That doesn't just make people trans. I just didn't wear skirts because I didn't want to. And considering the fact I use he/him pronouns and actually started wearing more feminine clothes, her logic doesn't work.

[@WhereIsMySock03]

It's giving transmed vibes. I'm a nonbinary intergender/intersex lesbian who dresses very femme and loves my beard because it makes me feel feminine. I wonder how accepting she'd be of that.

[@MisterGhostly]

Just a cross dresser who gets off on humiliation/children/money. Just a angry dude who used it to gain “fame”

[@dariusmcfarter6105]

i hate that part about her content soooo much because it just sets us back, if transgender is defined by clothes then it discredits the transgender experience. it also just invalidates gender non conforming people

[@Hutchinson585]

As a straight woman i love men's clothing and people often think im lesbian because of it.. i don't care im very comfortable in my baggy pants with f-ing POCKETS!😂

[@cumeatergrr]

Transgender man here, I can say that yes, being misgendered on accident hurts for some, HOWEVER it doesn't hurt enough to be reporting it to a manager and ruining someone's career

[@vexywexypoo]

Tbh cutting my finger on those plastic lids hurts more than being misgendered in public.

[@henrybusse7513]

Impeccable name I might say

[@linn9047]

villian pfp that also looks like rui[?]

[@cumeatergrr]

@ yep

[@Evshivem]

PREACH! SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK!

[@AlexWilliams-k4q]

As a trans person, I find it so weird when people theorise about celebrities, living or dead. It's often just conjecture that can be really tone deaf. Even if you are correct: That's their business and disrespectful to try to make it public. E.g: I'm a big fan of Nirvana and MCR and people theorise about people in both. I'd be happy for them if any of them came out, but that should happen on their terms, any the analysis of [Behviour] = [specific LGBTQ label] rubs me the wrong way. It undermines GNC folks by treating identity as clinical boxes and the points being made by the parts that are acts of protest or allyship. I understand wanting to be represented, but I don't think it's fair to argue over real people. Characters? Sure. But actual humans should be left to figure that out for themselves. Sometimes it's not that deep, but it's always not up to us to sleuth that out.

[@SamuelMarkus-l6h]

hi trans man here, i rarely correct people of my pronouns bec most people correct themselves! i don't think i would ever complain to a restaurant that an employee who is just trying to get their paycheck used the wrong wording for me like it really isnt that deep at all, everytime she tries to guilt trip these workers i literally sigh like girl get a life and stop eating out if its such a triggering problem for you

[@ratsonvenus]

Exactly!

[@Squideny]

As a trans girl i agree if someone misgenders me i just let them get on with their work, I feel so bad for minimum wage workers and getting mad at them is not only just rude but they probably feel bad too

[@alexv3372]

Thank you!

[@Aperson11028]

No yea I’m enby but I look like a girl people call me the wrong pronouns I don’t get mad the worker could no possibly know

[@Lizard-Wizard084]

I don’t call it out if it’s an interaction where I won’t see them again. It’s a waist of energy on both parts to me, especially when I know I don’t pass that well. I sound like a woman, and it’s not their fault they didn’t sus me out. If I see them everyday I will say what I prefer to be called, and they usually do well if they want to. If they don’t want to, I physically can’t make them want to, so it doesn’t matter. Waste of time. Some people are more sensitive about it, which I understand. It does suck to have every outside force feel like it’s invalidating who you are inside, but I don’t like that she guilt trips people who simply didn’t know any better because she’s a stranger to them. That’s stupid.

[@jeongbun2386]

Literally no trans person I know would walk out (esp while recording) for being misgendered. They go thru much worse lmao. Not to mention how monotone her voice is, such ragebait. And people believe it 💀

[@Aperson11028]

I am trans like 12 of my friends are also transgender (so not all of them but a lot) and I don’t think most people even correct people when they get misgendered out of fear much less be rude about it

[@theidiotsacc]

That’s what I’m thinking. There’s literally trans people being beaten to death by bullies I feel like being accidentally misgendered is not something to make that much of a fuss over

[@mushroomroyalty]

She might just be a grifter imo

[@ewetn1]

It does seem like rage bait, but to what end? The only purpose would be to make trans people look overly sensitive and triggered and crazy. Why would a trans person want to do that? Edit-- I get it now. They're like nickocado. They used ragebait to get attention and clout ultimately as a way to drive people to their OF to make money. Sigh.

[@ewetn1]

Damn was my comment deleted by automod? Because I mentioned lilly Tino being an onlyf---- creator? Are we not allowed to use that word? I didn't even use it, I used the abbreviation. Edit-- and I said I understood why she did ragebait, even though it's demeaning. It's to get more attention, to get more ShmonlyShmans customers. Same business model as the 🥑man.

[@arglaser]

Literally just discovered your channel. Such a good, unbiased view. Such a good take. Will definitely keep watching your stuff! Oh yeah and .. broomstick

[@bagandbroad]

I don’t think kids need to know about sex before gender at all. They learn about gender from the second they are born and there’s nothing inherently sexual about gender, even if gender is relevant to sexuality. As you said really well! Not to say diagnose 4 year olds, because talk to any queer or trans person and there’s a good chance they went through many identities before finding the one that truly matches them, self included. You can know there’s something different about yourself without figuring out what that is and will always be immediately. And the neurodivergent thing is very true. But I think there’s a difference between listening to kids and allowing a kid to express themselves in a way that makes them happy, or teaching them to accept others, versus locking them into a decision they made as a young child, including locking them in to the gender they were assigned at birth. And I absolutely do not think there’s any reason to make Disneyland genitalia videos when you’re also making children’s educational content. There’s zero reason for that. And the combination of public sex work and educational kid videos is gross. And wearing gendered clothing equaling gender is so archaic, I want to scream

[@kittysoftpaws3677]

Man i agree so much, people need to give their kids both "boy" and "girl" toys when theyre old enough for toys and just lt them choose what kind of stuff they like instead of making them choose based on gender

[@alecchristenson2072]

fr fr

[@bovinearrogance]

@@kittysoftpaws3677 I'd rather the kid verbally decide for themselves what kinda toys they want as opposed to just getting both genders of toys. if you aren't sure what stuff they'd like, get them something that isn't gendered at all. I remember as a little girl, I would BEG my mom for a robotic T-rex toy cus my brother got one and I wanted one. I'd get the Boy Happy meals cus they always had way better toys, like TNMT. I wanted a Nerf gun/Nerf gun set, but my parents got me the fucking NERF Rebel version and the Shitty Bow and Arrow it came with. I hated NERF Rebel cus it was far worse than a real NERF gun. Girls toys, in general, were always just shitter in quality than Boys toys were. Yaknow what- just never get girl-specific toys. 99% of them now adays are either poop related or baby related anyways. It's weird.

[@anachronism5271]

yesss like a 4-5 year old should be able to ask to be called whatever they want. it's why even if you socially transition, a lot of kids don't medically transition. and if they do go on hormone blockers, then they change their identity as they learn more about themselves, they can undo that and start their puberty.

[@bovinearrogance]

bruh did my whole comment just vanish-

[@jademoon7938]

Servers go on autopilot. Everyone has their own little internal script they use. Some people say “folks” a lot. “how are we this evening” whatever. Just things you say day in and out. Sir and ma’am are unquestionably the most common ones because some people are raised to use them as well. I heard them. They sound like they are in the sir/ma’am compulsion. You can’t forget that, beyond personal belief and empathy, so many people have been raised and trained to say sir and ma’am as the most RESPECTFUL way to speak to people. Most of those people can’t stop it because they’re accustomed to using them with absolutely everyone. It’s a script in their brain. This woman is sick. Not because of her life path and identity. Because she is feeding off the energy of negativity and seems to enjoy trying to get people fired for BEING POLITE. And doing their jobs. It’s absolutely ridiculous to pretend like anything she’s filming is malicious or deserving of being reported to a manager. It is so demented. “It’s like a knife through the heart” right yeah totally, that’s why you intentionally subject yourself to it daily, going out to eat and filming HOPING they misgender you so you can get them fired.

[@kamrynceleste3130]

I was raised by VERY strict parents in the South and it was literally beat into me to say “sir/ma’am,” so thank you for acknowledging the fact that most people that say those terms are doing it in almost an autopilot.

[@jademoon7938]

@@kamrynceleste3130 Yeah totally. I feel like some people prefer to pretend it’s malicious because it’s not what they want to hear and it makes them mad. Like, “How dare you clock me?” When like… Honestly people are not trying to hurt anyone. That’s not on most people’s minds. And most who say sir ma’am are not actively choosing to misgender. And besides, if someone maliciously called a female presenting person sir, they’d say “sorry SIR” and you’d know. It’s in the tone. A genuine sir or ma’am can be corrected like, “please don’t call me sir”. Heck I imagine a lot of younger women don’t like ma’am either. Makes them feel old. It’s not just gender. But it’s polite so no one says anything. You’re trying to be polite. I’m sorry you were treated so harshly. Kids don’t deserve to be hit or hurt by their parents. That’s awful. I get it though. Socially that was mandatory only a few generations ago. I remember teachers wanting sir and ma’am used. They must too. Most people aren’t like her though. That’s her own trauma she’s foisting on innocent servers trying to make money.

[@dreamiinotdream730]

Right. She’s acting like people using their deeply ingrained manners is a personal attack. I have friends who don’t identify with their sex and it’s so easy to them to correct people who misgender them and those people will normally do a quick ‘oh sorry’ or ‘right, right’ and use the correct pronouns and move on. Even cis people get misgendered, I’ve been misgendered and it really isn’t a career ending issue

[@JamesTrainer-m2p]

Hey I agree, I serve and I have a script I just run through. I accidentally called this little old woman a sir multiple times before I realized she was a woman I felt so bad lol but yeah , this lady…. Bitch I’m busy af I just am thinking about how much shit I got to do to get ur order and food idgaf about what u identify as lol why would I do it on purpose u pay my tip bitch

[@theoreo2904]

20:18 - Regarding trans youth, it's admittedly a heavy topic because you either have one extreme or the other and I really appreciate the sincerity you have for it. Personally, I grew up in a household where transgender people just. wasn't a concept. When I was growing up, I knew almost immediatly I was masculine (I am trans male for context). Around the age of 6, I would call myself "my brother's brother," and then try to justify that in a bunch of words saying, "but it's because he doesn't have a brother and I'm just a tomboy," or something. One of my sisters boyfriends always wore hats and when I would playfully take them, I was immediatly reprimended for it because a hat is something much more personal to men. I immediatly decide to start wearing hats because that's what guys are supposed to do (in my 8 y/o perspective) and then go "but I'm not a guy, I'm just a tomboy." It is studied and proven that children understand gender as a concept at a very young age, they just don't have the terminology yet to fully explain it. That being said, gender and sexual identity is a journey! It's supposed to be confusing, a little scary, awkward, shifting and changing. Once I learned about transgender people in middle school, I found myself still very hesitant and unsure about my gender identity for around 3 years. It takes a lot of self exploration to fully understand yourself, and admittedly I STILL don't fully understand myself and I don't think I ever will but that is ok. The dangerous territory is when you involve medical procedures into transgender youth care. I think the age of four is unacceptable to do anything to them for... well for a lot of reasons. That being said, it's very beneficial to offer your support as they want to try out new pronouns and names or try on different clothes or try different toys. Obviously, they don't know about sex and the nuances put into genitalia and they don't need to. Your gender identity doesn't have to be the same thing throughout your life. To put it simply from an ally parent, 'I'd rather write five different names for my child than write their legal name on a death certificate' (This is paraphrased).

[@Edgeworthscravat]

I get called 'ma'am' and 'miss' and 'darling' every time I go out. They don't know I'm non binary, and I wouldn't make it a hard time for the person who is probably over-worked, under-paid, and exhausted. It happens. It sucks, yeah, but it happens. And life goes on.

[@freddysw]

Tell me I got it wrong, and I promise I will do my best to not make that mistake.

[@beepboop2842]

and ppl just refer to u based on presentation. if i presented more masculine then at first glance ill be referred to by he/him (my proper pronouns). but if i was more fem ill unfortunately be addressed as she cuz ppl will just go according to how they perceived u no matter how wrong they may be.

[@sophroniel]

It's also like.... how are people supposed to know if you are a stranger? I don't want to be offending anyone, and I've unfortunately had so much aggression from some trans women about their pronouns (they were just not very nice people in general, it had nothing to do with them being trans, I hope what I'm saying makes sense) I'm a bit scared to even address people now, because I don't want to be yelled at for making a mistake, even if I wouldn't knowingly misgender someone :(

[@SuryaIsAGoober]

Tbh I’m used to it as a FTM trans guy I only correct people that are friends but nicely like “hey, can you please call me he/him or it/its? I would greatly appreciate it.” It’s not that hard to be kind also you shouldn’t expect a stranger to get your pronouns right, they assume by your looks and voice it happens I even get it wrong sometimes but I ask or check their profile for their pronouns. Bam problem solved.

[@snickers_xd2343]

@@sophronielif it’s a stranger and a short interaction you don’t even have to guess, just a “excuse me, do you know where (blank) is?” usually you don’t even need to refer to people with binary pronouns if you don’t plan on talking to them in depth, gender neutral terms are proper nouns in the English language for a reason, you won’t always know and that’s fine

[@smhivehadenough]

She gives me big toddler energy. The way she’s always running to tattle to everyone who passes by makes me cringe

[@vixen_j6141]

I love rewatching Dankyjabo's videos they always entertain me!

[@anachronism5271]

The best commentary Lily Tino COULD be making about being misgendered too is that we should REMOVE gendered language from the workforce. Saying "sir" or "ma'am" to someone isn't really needed in most interactions these days. You can just greet someone with "Hello, how can I help you?" or serve something with "Here you go." That would legitimately be the most productive and progressive way to do things rather than still wanting people to assume, and hoping they just assume correctly.

[@blahxblahxblah100]

Smart! She got so close when she said, “you don’t have to call me ma’am, just don’t call me sir”

[@Lani-wo2ie]

Yeah this is what I don't understand, seems like a very American thing. In Australia we are just like "hey how are ya", sir and ma'am also just seens very....I'm your servant rather than an equal.

[@anachronism5271]

@@Lani-wo2ie Heavy agree, as an American in my day to day I rarely use sir or ma'am if ever. I can't even recall the last time I did. I think it also comes along with the stereotype of "Boomers demand insane respect" where they WANT you to feel like you're a servant rather than an equal if you aren't working a "respectable job".

[@callieestra1095]

I live in the south so that’s just how we do it here. I think the issue is how are the rest of us supposed to know what you want to be referred to as or what may be offensive to you when you don’t look or sound like what you want to be referred to as? If I saw Lily out in public, I would have thought she was a gay male. I think it’s out of touch to think others should change how they speak to please such a small portion of the population. Just correct the person and move on

[@silly.gr3mlin]

THIS! I work in food service and do this at work because I don’t want to make anyone feel uncomfortable. I also just think sir/maam just feels uncomfortable to use 😭

[@cs1264]

Hi! I am a cis music teacher and I have a few trans students! Clearly, I’m not an expert on the subject, but I think it’s really important to let kids express themselves in whatever way makes them feel comfortable, so long as they aren’t hurting anyone intentionally! Kids have told me they feel comfortable going by different names and pronouns they were given at birth across all age ranges, but mostly in the middle school to high school range. Every time this happens, even if the parent doesn’t know yet, I honor that kid’s wishes because I aim to have a positive learning environment, one that encourages self expression, joy, and confidence in yourself and your abilities! I think it would be a shame to tell a student that I think they should wait to want to be called a different name or pronoun just because I deem them not ready. Often times, these kids blossom in class because they feel more free to be themselves (even if who they are is ever-evolving) and it is SO rare for any of the other kids to bat an eye at the change! I find that children are much more accepting than adults and that shame and bigotry really are taught behaviors. Anyways, end of rant, just here to remind everyone that kids are people too and sometimes they do know what’s right for them! LISTEN TO KIDS!

[@jchristner]

I just know you're an incredible teacher!!! This understanding is so needed in the school system!!

[@gracevettori9664]

yesssss i definitely didnt agree with OP's point here that we shouldnt listen to kids lol. even if it changes, lets just honor them.

[@HaraldSon94]

Wow, what a self congratulation comment. You forgot to write "WHITE cis wæmen". Stop teaching weird stuff to children, who are impressionable... and kids trust adults to a fault. You can teach a child to hate or love anything....and make em soldiers in actual wars for it... GGGGG You are a part of the problem....you can absolutely listen to kids, but hopefully you don't most of the time, cuz kids be stupid mini humans. They just wanna do fun stuff and often don't care for there own safety, comfort or others... thats why it should be an adult in the room.. u ain't it lady.....You gonna call "Henry" a good boy and sett out a bowl of dog food for lunch cuz he thinks playing house is the same as being a dog?! 😂 stop it, get some help Stop interference with our community and as you so elegantly wrote....you ain't no expert 🙄 from a gay firmer teacher who have never said or brought that to a student attention. I did save a few fake trans kids, by talking with them, WITH there parents. Who do you think you are that can go behind actual parents backs... you are not that important. You are ruining kids and familys 4 what? We know for what.....self congratulations and having the feeling of sitting on a white horse, both "saving" and looking down on others. Bet you are a " white CIS wæmen, lefty with a plack that says something stupid about vino and mondays" 🍷 😂 Get a personality and stop with the stupido

[@HaraldSon94]

Wow, what a self congratulation comment. You forgot to write "white cis women". Stop teaching weird stuff to children, who are impressionable. Kids trust adults to a fault. You can teach a child to hate or love anything and make em soldiers in actual wars fir it... GGGGG 💀 You are a part of the problem....you can absolutely listen to kids, but you don't most of the time, cuz kids be stupid mini humans. They just wanna do fun stuff and often don't care for there own safety, comfort or others... thats why it should be an adult in the room.. u ain't it lady.....You gonna call "Henry" a good boy and sett out a bowl of dog food for lunch cuz he thinks playing house is the same as being a dog?! And that's what "makes them comfortable" stop it, get some help Stop interference with our community and as you so elegantly wrote....you ain't no expert. From a gay... former kindergarten and school teacher, who have never said or brought that to a childs attention. Be a better adult for the future of the kids, nit there comfort. I did save a few fake trans kids, AKA "tom boys" by talking with them AND WITH the parents. Who do you think you are that can go behind actual parents backs... you are not that important. You are ruining kids and familys 4 what? We know for what.....self congratulations and having the feeling of sitting on a white horse, both "saving" and looking down on others. Bet you are a " white CIS wæmen, lefty with a plack that says something stupid about vino and mondays" 🍷 😂 Get a personality and stop with the stupido. Leve the kids alone. It's weird

[@melaniegonzalez8316]

i agree! this was the only point he made i disagreed with. it’s important to let children (safely) explore their identity to be able to discover who they are.

[@angshusarma8331]

Come and teach my kids about this BS, i will be very ready to be in jail

[@Rivers_TG]

I was NOT expecting to get blasted by Daveed Diggs reference in the first few seconds. As a Hamilton fan, that shit scared me💀

[@LainonIine]

DEADASS LIKE 😭😭

[@Bestdressedveggie]

I was listening to What'd I Miss before this

[@d3dsh0t]

clipping. >>>>>>>> hamilton

[@HairyOldMen-n6q]

It's the fact that I never saw it until he pointed it out. Now I can't unsee it.

[@mik3680]

ok??

[@viviwinnie6252]

19:23 hey so a little note, dysphoria and dysmorphia are two different things! Dysphoria is what we know as gender dysphoria, when you feel that discomfort about your body and your gender because you do not feel comfortable with it, While dysmorphia is generally a term used for body dysmorphia, which is perceiving your body completely differently than others do, and this is mainly related to TCAs :D

[@Dankyjabo]

I know I know, that was just me misspeaking lol

[@viviwinnie6252]

@@Dankyjabo dwdw, i love the video anyways! You're so underated it HURTS

[@Bell.-]

Could I ask what you mean by TCAs? Like antidepressants? I have PMDD which stands for premenstrual dysphoric disorder. The symptoms are mental and physical and would be a very long list. It took forever to get diagnosed and it runs my life. But I get so confused to what the name of it even means, google doesn't help much and I was the first patient of my psychiatrist to diagnose me with it.

[@res6148]

You can have both though, and a lot of people definitely do have both

[@kalyasaify]

oh man 🙄 I have body dysmorphia and I know what I'm talking about... being overstimulated in some body parts bc of clothes or puberty overall (breasts, etc) can look the same for a kid/teen. wrapped up all of this is heavily spreaded misinformation by the elite to control population/eugenics à la ww👉🏼👉🏼. nobody can change their gender no matter how hard they want to. the mass stupidity is wild... educate yourself, but first erase EVERYTHING

[@eclipsxes]

hey trans guy here, i realised it at about 15 to 16. there were no "signs" as kid. i liked dresses, i liked boy toys. kids should be kids and allowed to wear and play with what they like and figure themselves out in their own terms and time instead of adults deciding for them and telling them "hey you gotta be a girl" or "hey you like trucks so youre trans!" its okay to teach them about it; i told my niece when she was 10 since that age youre able to grasp onto the concept a bit more, (unlike my nephew whos still younger so idrc and let him grow up some more) and she finds it fun to call me by the new name, but thats about it. i explained it when she asked, but i could tell she could understand it properly yet and thats totally okay. you deffo have have a fair point. also you should totally wear a purple jacket in some video to give it a jefferson feel cuz when i clicked it before you even said it i said omg daveed diggs?? much love from germany

[@rainbowgirl3225]

I actually agree with believe 4 or 5 year old kids when they they're trans. But if they later realize they are actually cis, believe them again. Just support kids as they explore their identity ❤

[@rainbowgirl3225]

And support at that age is just trying out style, pronouns, and names.

[@Aperson11028]

Mhm my lil sibling used to think they were a guy but as of now they aren’t a girl or a guy

[@meldoesntwanttotellyouthei7012]

Right! If I knew what being trans was at a young age I probably would have come out sooner, and it would have saved me a lot of grief

[@yucky-yucky]

BASED

[@EZOnTheEyes]

Trans folk here, agree! I knew at 4 something wasn't right, I learned words for it at 9. Listen to kids, allow them to express in their early age (nothing irreversible happens for first 16-18yrs.)

[@animetibs]

i was busy eating a broomstick when this video came on my feed, awesome work

[@bovinearrogance]

mmmm broomstick Wooden or plastic.

[@SoleilLunex]

​@bovinearrogance I saw them, it was a rare and expensive, metal handled broom stick. said the flavor profile was a mixture of grapes and copper.

[@savannahnickel1041]

Big Cobain fan. He definitely was a big feminist and also hated toxic masculinity. I don't think we'll ever have enough information though to call him trans.. That's wild.

[@Lesbiwolf92]

it's crazy how obsessed with labels and fitting into boxes we have become compared to the previous decades. We have gone from breaking gender norms to reinforcing them by convincing people if they do something or act outside of their gender norm they must be harboring gender dysphoria and are trans but haven't figured it out yet.

[@beepboop2842]

its ironic cuz the whole point of trans movement is break the binary, why are we repackaging it again? kurt cobain was a real person, hes not a character that you just headcanon. i dont think hes trans, he might have a queer presentation but hes simply just a nonconforming man.

[@moshpitmi]

P R E A C H.

[@moshpitmi]

this is a very underrated mindset

[@zora2935]

I keep thinking the same thing. It is very curious to me that this new generation wants to label everything that way.

[@slowbicyclexx]

i'm a trans woman and seeing people think like that makes me so angry. queer people have worked to break stereotypes and encourage non-comformity and now a lot of people have seemingly went back on that. i wonder if lillytino would see me as less of a woman because i wear jeans more than skirts or because i have a sweater from the men's section.

[@emmy372_bce0]

deleting KZbin for not notifying me until a whole three (3) minutes

[@erickthered7997]

Y did explain the word three 😂

[@millie_rose106]

3?! I got 10! This platform is not what it used to be.

[@CaptainCaoilainn]

@@millie_rose106try 50+ minutes

[@0live0llie]

@@erickthered7997i think, though i could be mistaken, it could be for screen readers. either way i know for certain its an accessibility thing

[@Littlewing.]

Not sure if it’s from not even realizing whether it is an ad that can be skipped until too algorithmically late orrrrrr not…..soooo maybe KZbin just does now suck

[@07SapphireLights]

Had to ride in on my broomstick to say how awesome this video went. What a beautiful way to tackle such a nuanced issue. Applause!

[@Ww-nh9pl]

Idk why so many need to label 4/5 year olds! My 4 year old daughter wanted to be a puppy today, she tried to eat her plate of mango on the floor like dog. She went to the store with me dressed like a dinosaur last week. A few months ago she hated the word girl and despised princesses, now she thinks boys are icky and loves the word girl. Loves Mac and cheese one day and the next hates it, went through a dislike of forks so would eat everything (even noodles) with a spoon! If they like something or want to be something they can!!! My daughter has been every animal you can think of! She has boy clothes and girl clothes, a mix of toys, plays in mud and with barbies. Some days she’ll draw on a mustache and wear her dad’s large hoodies to pretend she’s a boy then wear fluffy princess dresses, heels and a tiara another day. I can’t express this enough, Lily is childless she has no clue what she’s talking about, but children change almost by the minute! Kids also believe that their parents are mind readers, so when you aren’t up to date on all of their constantly changing likes/dislikes they get very offended My daughter also enjoys dressing like a witch, broomstick and all!!

[@lookilookibuthearingtooi]

@@McMonkeytoes I think those parents like to feel special. Like "autism mom's". They want to feel cool. My kid is trans. That's the new trend now. I want to get attention. They make it all about them. I've seen those people on German TV and then morons get upset and think that's what every parents of every child transgender or not is going to do.

[@damshcup2464]

This whole ksi crying situation has me mentally drained on top of sixth form and all its homework, so seeing a new dankyjabo video released is quite literally making me soooo much happier. Dankyjabo and scream 2 (rewatching) what a night this is going to be

[@BLAMETHEMOVIES]

omg scream 2 mentioned my favourite movie ever

[@damshcup2464]

@@BLAMETHEMOVIES w favourite movie 🔥

[@damshcup2464]

@@BLAMETHEMOVIES omg I just realised your name is blame the movies and your pfp is Mickey 😭 w ghostface fr tho lmao

[@BLAMETHEMOVIES]

@@damshcup2464 he’s my favourite ghostface i love him deeply!!

[@-bitglitch]

43:07 Hi, Huge Nirvana and Kurt fan here. Now before she went on misinforming SO MUCH, if she even did a TINY bit of digging she would find one of the MANY instances where Kurty himself said in interviews that his lyrics didn't mean anything. He was often asked about his odd lyrics and the "deep meaning" behind them and he would respond with something along the lines about his lyrics not having any meaning behind them, he just wrote whatever came to mind. Secondly, another thing she misinformed about and may or may not have purposefully not included was the fact that, yes, Kurt did say he originally thought he was gay when he was younger, but his literal next line was something about the fact that he didn't like cheerleaders or hanging out with the jocks, so he believed he wasn't normal, because all of the other "Normal" boys acted like that. Third of all, Kurt many times said that he dressed in women's clothes to quote "Piss off the Homophobes" and would often say how he did it because he found them comfy. Just because you find something comfy doesn't mean you identify completely with it. I, for example, am a girl who loves wearing suits and what would be known as "male attire" such as dress pants, dress shoes, and vests, I do it because i love the way it looks and yes, i do find it comfy. And yes, i really dislike wearing dresses because i personally dont like the way they feel. This however, doesn't mean i am Transgender, because i acknowledge thats not who i am even at the somewhat young age of 15, i know thats not me. What's really funny here is the double-standard. If a girl were to dress in traditional mens clothes or boyish clothes (Baggy shorts or pants, and loose shirts with a hat idk bro) she would be seen as a Tomboy, however as soon as a man does it he's immediately trans? The fact that she gets mad at minimum wage workers, genuinely trying their best to get by because unlike her they have to work hard for their money, for misgendering her and she turns around to misgender Kurt because she ASSUMES (Big word there) just because he has some feminine features, then that automatically makes him trans. She's so hypocritical, man. Kurt Cobain was not transgender and claiming him to be just because you ASSUME so, is no better and someone referring to you as "sir". I dont think you would really like it if someone were to go up to you and ASSUME you were a man because you may have some masculine features right? So lets listen to our own advice and not do the same to others. (Sorry I had a yap session, I really like Kurt and Nirvana and I needed to make sure people were informed about this the same way I was so they better understand my side. Also if anyone has any more questions about Kurt and other things to why he might not have been Trans, just ask and ill probably tell u abt it. This was in no way made to upset or offend anyone of the Trans community, I made this with the sole intention of informing everyone else on the truth. If any of my words have hurt anyone in said Community then i genuinely, sincerely, apologize. I did not make this with any ill intentions. Thanks.)

[@ql7855]

believing kids when they say they don't wanna be this or that gender is valid tho... believing them ≠ teaching or asserting gender dysphoria. imo believing kids is to give them more space to explore their own identities. believing them also doesn't equal anything medical

[@MrsPixie-ni4lb]

Being trans and having gender dysphoria are not interchangeable. This is a common misconception that has come from phobic far right rhetoric/talking points. (My tone is not hostile, just informing a stranger. Intention is to help stranger. Plz no drama)

[@westley5572]

​@@MrsPixie-ni4lblmfao are you trans? trans man here, this is the craziest thing I've ever read.

[@westley5572]

@@MrsPixie-ni4lbholy shit are you serious? this isn't right wing at all. gender dysphoria proves the existence of trans people needing to transition to feel comfortable. you clearly are misinformed. do not spread that anywhere.

[@CaraRowen]

yes to both these things. it's super valid and important to listen to children's feelings on gender and allow them to express it however makes them happy. All it results in is children who are happier with themselves and their body regardless of what their gender expression ends up being. they don't have to be dysphoric to find expressing themselves something that brings them joy.

[@CameronJackson-x2i]

@@MrsPixie-ni4lbtypical

[@sy_duck]

As a trans guy, I understand your worry with officially diagnosing a child with gender dysphoria. However, accepting a child who expresses feeling that they are the opposite gender etc. doesn’t have to result in a diagnosis until much later! The most loving way to handle the expression of these feelings in children is to listen and ask them compassionate clarifying questions. And then share with them the basics of what it means to be trans, and let them know that whether they feel this way about their gender forever or change their mind in the future, you’ll be there to love and support them. After this, the only accommodations to be made are allowing them more of a voice while clothes shopping or getting a haircut! :) And paying attention to what types of toys/belongings they gravitate towards! It’s all about gently guiding your child to express themselves both authentically and safely/appropriately. Therapy may not be needed until much later, and HRT wouldn’t even be on the table for years, so that’s not a worry either. So while I do understand your concerns for sure, I think the outcome of affirming children in their identities (whether they stay the same or fluctuate over time) is much more underwhelming than you may have thought!

[@CaraRowen]

👏🏽

[@erebeliose]

I was looking for a comment talking about this part as a transgender person I was very uncomfortable with this part of the video because this topic is a very dangerous to talk about trans kids exist and their health and lifes are on the hands of adults that most of the time will underestimate the capacity that children have of thinking critically thank you for your comment!

[@rorank]

I totally agree and was looking to see if anybody was going to address this point. I’m not trans but the rhetoric surrounding children has always been challenging at best and bigoted at worst. Not every trans person gets treatments, not every trans person even tells their doctor necessarily. It is unfortunate that when the topic is brought up, people are all too happy to bring up medical treatments that they know nothing about and a body that isn’t theirs. Straight cis people (I’m straight and cis) are so quick to wanna talk about other peoples genitals but it’s literally not about that… All you have to do is allow your kids to express themselves without “correcting” them about what they’re expected to act like. Regardless, an overall very respectful and reasonable video, just disagree with the logic and rhetoric used in that section. In general I feel like the “what about the children” responses to modern issues are cop outs. Saying “I can tolerate this, but I don’t want my kids to be exposed to it” feels like code for “I’m going to pretend that this issue or person doesn’t exist and when my kids ask about it, I’ll say something mildly hateful and be done with it”.

[@Wolfmasterarreis1]

This! All of this!

[@doagii2649]

as a fellow trans guy, i’ve ALWAYS known i was trans, but for a majority of my life i didn’t know what trans was and just thought i was different because no one taught me until i discovered the internet. it’s 10000000% better to teach your kid on your own about stuff like this rather than risk having them look for an adult to teach them on the internet…i don’t think i have to explain why that’s dangerous, and i honestly blame my parents for not teaching me when i CLEARLY showed signs of being trans. i’d always play as the big brother with my friends when we played house, or SPECIFICALLY a boy dog/cat(i loved pretending to be animals), and i remember seeing male characters on tv and getting all fluttery and jealous and at the time thinking i had a crush, but now i realised that it was just gender envy😭😭 i got gender envy from a DOG!!! delgado from beverly hills chihuahua (10/10 movie)

[@Evshivem]

I’m only 3 minutes into the video but I just wanted to say something really quick. Last year, I stitched that video of her 3:28 saying that it felt like a knife in the heart to be called the wrong pronouns. That video I posted ended up getting over 7 million views. Me, being a genderqueer person who goes by they/them pronouns thought it was ok to give my opinion on how she handled the situation. Most people in the comments agreed with me that she was wrong in how she handled it and shouldn’t have been calling the mangers over to complain about a minimum wage employee calling her the wrong pronouns. A day or two after the video started going viral, I was informed that my video was being used by transphobes to further their agenda. I was also informed that my video had sent a lot of people over to Lily’s TikTok page and that she was getting a lot of hate due to my video. I actually reached out to her through TikTok dm’s and apologized for the transphobic comments that she was getting, that never being my intention in the first place. I told her I didn’t agree with how she handled it, but it didn’t mean that people got to send her death threats and other horrible transphobic comments. SHE READ MY MESSAGE AND NEVER RESPONDED. I had turned off comments for the time being and after I saw that she read my apology and chose not to respond, I turned them back on. As much as I hate her, it’s not fair to disrespect her identity on purpose, especially as a fellow trans person. I also think she’s acting the way she is because she recently came out as trans. When I came out as trans at 13, I would’ve described being called the wrong pronouns as a knife in the heart too. I was that type of person to get angry and upset when someone messed up either my name or pronouns. Over the years, (I’m 18 now) I’ve learned to accept it and just go with the flow. I have a feminine body. People are going to call me she. It’s inevitable. There’s definitely a difference between how I acted at 13 compared to her acting like this as a grown adult though. I have this much 🤏 sympathy for her. But that’s all.

[@purpleducck]

Lilly is exactly what transphobes think us trans folk are. I promise most of us are normal 😅

[@zora2935]

What is a transphob?

[@CameronJackson-x2i]

Cap

[@purpleducck]

@@CameronJackson-x2i imagine using cap in 2024 😭🙏

[@strayrobin3766]

1:02:08 Trans women CAN, in fact, produce sperm. The amount/quality is the only issue. It’s completely possible for a transgender woman to impregnate or use ivf/iui to have biological children with a partner that produces eggs (assuming she has frozen sperm, is willing to go off HRT, or hasn’t gone through SRS). Estrogen can make a trans woman infertile, but it isn’t guaranteed.

[@urdadsbigtoe123]

what’s HRT

[@Liv_shoe]

@@urdadsbigtoe123hormone replacement therapy. Taking blockers for some hormones and taking other supplemental hormones

[@rabies__]

​@@urdadsbigtoe123 hormone replacement therapy

[@hananana9564]

​@@urdadsbigtoe123hormone replacement therapy

[@sarahwithanh4272]

@@urdadsbigtoe123 hormone replacement therapy, taking testosterone or estrogen supplements to change your hormone levels

[@howmanygecswasthat]

I will have to disagree with the idea that no one can know their gender at a young age. I am trans myself and I knew at age 10 (didn't come out yet then), and I have known so many fellow trans people who knew when they were even younger children. I happen to know a trans kid who is 10 years old himself and out socially as trans. I do however, believe that just because you support your child doesn't mean you have to rush them into transitioning medically. The most a young child can legally do transition wise is go by a different name (usually that's not even made legal until they are older because many trans people test out names and don't go with the first one they choose), maybe change their hair and clothes. If they're old enough to begin puberty, some might go on hormone blockers if that's legal for them, and then move on to hormones when they are old enough to be secure in that decision. But no one is out here giving surgery and/or hormones to children, and social transition is reversible. You can always reintroduce yourself and change your style, I think it's very important to leave room for self expression no matter what it turns into. I appreciate your respect during this conversation though, this is a breath of fresh air coming from a commentary channel. I always appreciate your willingness to learn and be respectful, and your ability to maintain relatively unbiased and calm. I absolutely hate the way she presented that video though, it's framed in a way that's overly simplified but not in the correct way. There are ways to explain being trans in a simple way that's easy to understand, but her attempt MISSED the mark completely.

[@teethtown8159]

Hey Jabo, gender dysphoria isn't the same as being trans, being trans is a person identifying as a gender different from what they were assigned at birth, gender dysphoria is the extreme feeling of dread regarding your body and how people see you and how you see yourself all around gender, how are doesnt match up, how much it all hurts. Another thing: If a young kid is curious about exploring gender, it's good for a parent to support so that the kid can avoid gender dysphoria. I agree with you on letting kids live out their childhood, but if a kid tells their parent(s) that they want to try on clothes from the other gender's section, they should go for it, it probably won't even mean the kid is trans, if the kid wants to go by a different name or be called a boy or a girl, I think it's good to try it out, make the kid comfortable during their childhood and allow exploration, it may be a phase, but it's good to have an understanding of your identity and can really help avoid discomfort

[@Calib_GT]

Found your channel through the Smartschoolboy9 videos, And yea, I subscribed instantley, good content, you're enjoyable to watch, keep it up!

[@Lxkoxkoksolps]

same!! :3❤

[@Ieatmicroplasticsforbreakfast]

Me too and i love his videos sm!!

[@_confusedcat_]

34:56 I bet Kurt would have laughed in her face lmao. Kurt wasn’t trans, he was just happy with what he was wearing. The fact she states previously that we can’t base people off what they wear and such to gender and now saying Kurt must be transgender because he’s wearing girls clothes is so ironic it’s so funny.

[@hammerspaceworkshop4745]

I'm just imagining being a service worker and seeing her come in, be seated, and then start setting up the camera/smartphone and mic at the table. 😩

[@m0rkim00]

Around 19:00 , I just wanna say that at 4-5 years old, a child's "transition" would consist of clothing, name, pronouns, and hairstyle/haircut change. So it isn't dangerous to say that a kid may be trans. Especially since no medical transitioning would be included. But it should be left up to the kid rather than the parent to figure out.

[@username.not.known2473]

You're describing 'social transitioning', which is not a benign placeholder but instead is a powerful intervention. Children who are not encouraged to socially transition go on to desist from cross-sex ideation in over 85% of cases. In contrast, around 90% of children who do socially transition later go on to use pubertal suppressants and cross-sex exogenous hormones, both of which have serious and sometimes permanent unwanted effects. People talk about social transition like it's completely ineffective and means nothing. It isn't.

[@Doggcereal]

​@@username.not.known2473Sorry for being that guy but, sources? Also I don't know why you added the part of hormones "seriously" affecting the body, mate that's the whole point lmao Male pattern baldness might be seen as an 'unwanted' effect but that's what testosterone does. If your dad's bald and you take testosterone you're gonna go bald too, that's what testosterone is gonna do to you. If you don't want the effects then you're not obligated to take hormones, you can be trans and not want to medically transition

[@m0rkim00]

@@username.not.known2473 I don't think you understand anything about being trans. The previous reply said everything that needed to be said tbh

[@spinkboing]

@@username.not.known2473you got a source for that buddy

[@arbyswitch5580]

@@username.not.known2473 yeah well i mean going through puberty without HRT has also led to some permanent and unwanted effects on my body, i'll tell you what

[@KyeFowler06]

Lily talking about her BROOMSTICK in Disneyland is actually insane

[@GachaschoolWingsoffuture]

Tbh, I didn't know I was trans until I found out it was a thing. I kneww since Kindergarten, so actually around 4,that being a boy would be cool, but I kinda gave up that idea pretty quick since kid me thought it was impossible. Once my chest started to grow I felt way more uncomfortable in my body and all. So, after a while I was like 'Yeah, I think I'm trans'.

[@alexv3372]

Good for you bro

[@GachaschoolWingsoffuture]

@@alexv3372 thank you (: have a nice day

[@heyyyy270]

ok

[@321hackertime5]

bro same lmao i even hung out with only guys until the 4th grade

[@GachaschoolWingsoffuture]

@@321hackertime5 I didn't only hung out with guys, I generally didn't hang out with anybody since even in kindergarten somehow everyone thought I was weird. In first grade I got my first real friends. 2 guys, both also odd ones out

[@jonahwilcox8174]

Lilly needs to stop talking about getting her broomstick changed in innapropriate places.

[@M0bZ0Mb13]

Underrated comment. I don't think most people made it that far

[@S.Malama]

As a psychologist, this is highly concerning aiming such a young audience for this topic. Yes children should know about gender because it is important that they can name for example when something hurts ect. But telling such a young kid that it might be transgender is not the way to go at all. There is a reason why children are not diagnosed in such a young age (at least in my country but it get worse). There are so much co morbid factors and it is highly dangerous to diagnose as lose as I see it in California for example.

[@hannahp1108]

I had a coworker who had a child who was very defiant that they were a boy, despite being born female, at age 4. He started wanting to wear different clothes and go by a different name. Some kids *do* know, and social transition for them is harmless

[@camdenhunt7565]

You can definitely know that young, i'm trans and i remember pushing my chest down to seem flatter because i wanted to be a boy.

[@zora2935]

Some know. Some don’t. There are parts of this world where gay people (especially boys) get pushed into transitioning because that’s less shameful for the family. I think it is ok to let children experiment with stuff like their names and identities. But you don’t need to socially transition them at a young age. Give them the freedom to find out if they want to stick to it or change it again.

[@reissecupfilms]

@@zora2935 i'm not sure why it would be an issue to socially transition, there aren't any side effects or lasting changes

[@zora2935]

@@reissecupfilms why do you need to tho? I don’t mean that you shouldn’t allow the child to call themselves by a different name. But why the need for a transition? Why not let them figure it out without external pressure? Coming out is hard. Coming out as “not trans anymore” can also be hard when there has been a social transition already. Most decisions we make lead somewhere that can become permanent. It is easy to say that decisions are all reversible. But often times it isn't as easy in practice than it is in theory.

[@zora2935]

@@reissecupfilms there are ALWAYS side effects to everything we do. Why does a young child need to socially transition? Why not let them be a child and take their time?

[@78jujubs]

The way you went about this topic should be the standard for how other channels approach the mess that is Lily Tino. I've been trying to find someone who talks about the things Lily did wrong without being transphobic as hell. I want to thank you for this video. It's so fucked up that I have to thank you for having a measured and informed take that isn't transphobic.

[@sthom3052]

People born male when called sir is not misgendering. And should not be called she . What is transphobic about that

[@beigelbeits2522]

People will torment you for just saying that. People think they can just ‘identify’ as another gender and be called trans. What’s really happening is that men are pretending to be women and women are pretending to be men. The ‘transphobic’ part is that you are not calling a biological male a ‘she’ because he ‘identifies’ as a woman. It’s a delusion people came up with and considered a ‘hate crime’ if you don’t believe their delusion.

[@sm1leitsbeautiful]

Dropped my broomstick in excitement when this video dropped. Great work.

[@priscillaribeiro1988]

My own mother has been called “ Sir” on the phone for years, because she has a deeper voice . And she is a woman identifies as a woman, but she has never called corporate or management for them “ misgendering “ her! This person is insane 🤦🏻‍♀️🙄

[@godricsolo]

1:08:00 i think you misunderstood the point lily was making - doctors DO assign gender based off of gentalia and this doesnt account for intersex people who's symptoms dont manifent in a way that is visible to the naked eye. people are assigned one gender at birth and end up developing completely differently because genitals doesnt always equal hormones

[@JabariMore]

I was looking for this comment lol, thank you

[@CaraRowen]

thank you!

[@Lee-fx7bd]

It is veryyyyy common for super young trans kids to show sign of gender dismorphia. Im currently 18, and even though I didn't realize I was trans until a few years ago, I can recognize signs in my younger self showing I was. From saying I wanted to be a boy to leaning towards more masculine things once I had the concept of gender. We should believe all trans kids, even if they're four, because four year olds can acknowledge the fact that they feel differently. That doesn't mean if a little girl says she wants to be a boy, shes trans. Kids say stuff like that all the time. While we should believe trans kids, I think the best thing to do is to also go to professionals to avoid labeling a young kid with something they're not. While from what I know, kids knowing that young isn't common, it still happens and can still be valid. When I think of trans kids, I always think of a quote a mom of a trans kid said, "I'd rather have a kid who changes their pronouns a bunch of times then a dead one."

[@jenniferwilleybigg9385]

It's been a few hours worth of videos. Again, love it. AWESOME ❤😊

[@Rohlik_mnam]

2:31 malice? MALICE MIZER REFERENCE ‼️‼️🔥🔥🗣️🗣️🦅🦅

[@AlexanderL-p4m]

Hi, trans man here, I agree with most of your points. But I believe that allowing children in therapy for anything is generally good. Even simply allowing children to dress up or explore their expression. You are correct, nothing is set in stone and it should never be until they are an adult. I say let people be people. I also completely agree with the crossdressing take. I have always dressed masculine in childhood without realizing why it made me feel so comfortable until my twenties. I think gender is a spectrum. There is no one way to be a man or a woman. People should be allowed to explore themselves freely without this speculation or imposed boxes.

[@mushroomroyalty]

Another trans man here‼️ I agree, I realized my gender identity didn’t really match up to how I felt at like 11-12, so I just explored it, I went from genderfluid- nonbinary- then agender before landing in being a transgender guy. This kinda spanned over 3 years n stuff, so it wasn’t a quick process. I think it’s important to let kids explore themselves, figure out what they want and support them along the way.

[@SpecialBlanket]

Crossdresser here, I wish that could still just be a thing.

[@lunebuns3814]

I don't think it's a popular opinion amongst trans people that all kids as a part of growing up and hitting puberty experience gender discomfort, girls more so than boys. But it's true and studies have shown that freaking out and putting them in boxes the second they talk about it usually leads to solidifying the gender switch rather than to let the feelings naturally resolve as they grow into people. Not to say that all kids will have it resolved but for most it's just a natural part of growing up.

[@gin1924]

I don't understand why people would go to such lengths to have "their own" child when there are so many children in need of a loving adoptive family.

[@lookilookibuthearingtooi]

Because their aren't enough babies. Simply is that. And not everybody can see themselves raising an older kid that isn't there's. Because that also comes with baggage. You also have to remember that not everybody can love a child that isn't theirs. And adoption is often romanticized, too. While a lot of adoptive children get treated horribly, especially when they are older and maybe don't want to get hugged and stuff right away. And they actually have to leave again. And so on.

[@gin1924]

​@@lookilookibuthearingtooi you do realize that says a lot about people, and non of it is good, right? If you you can't love a child unless you shit it out, than that "love" you think you are feeling is just a complusion. Of course not everyone would be strong/capable enough to take proper care of a traumatized or disabled child, but that could happen with your "perfect breed, pure blood" child too, andin both cases you and your child should receive proper help from professionals. Children aren't toys you can just "want", paranting requires commitment and being capable of genuine affection. It's the same as people only getting a dog for the breed. Disgusting. And the fact that many foster kids end up in shitty situations is precisely because the "good" families would never raise "someone else's" child. Makes one wander how "good" these families actually are.. Governments are also to blame for making it too difficult to adopt except, "somehow", for people with ulterior motives. Adopting should require a serious in person psychological test at the very least, instead of loads of documents and money. In Italy we say 'Peper let's itself be written' and money is in the wrong hands more often than not. So yeah. Society sucks. Big shocker. Fight for the rights of the children who already exist instead of those who live in your fantasy. Sounds familiar? It should, because it's the same principle that explains why having the right to abort is so important. We call ourselves civilized, yet we still haven't learnt to prioritize caring for those in need.

[@Toa_general]

20:42 on topic with this, I do partly agree, you shouldn’t always diagnose a VERY young child with gender dysphoria BUT, there are many cases of kids as young as 4 thinking they are trans, and continuing to know that all the way up to their current age of being adults. Children do experience and have gender dysphoria You just need to be educated on it, and it needs to be done properly, the way Lilly describes it. Bad. Not accurate. Kids always go through the “I don’t want to wear my gender clothing!” Even when cis. Annoying she makes it seem like everyone that does that is trans

[@kalyasaify]

NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! damn no!!!! naah... nope. sterilizing kids is unethical. all of this is overall not ok and beyond 'just' unethical on so many levels. no need to educate most ppl on such a rare thing that isn't essential. social media is so wrong for pushing all of this. it's kids man. kids are weird af, so are teens. puberty is rough!!! confusing, so damn confusing. menstruation and those ups and downs daily, I still struggle, hormones need to do their job to keep us alive. no need to interrupt this beautiful creation of the universe ♡

[@CaraRowen]

not like there was a whole "tomboy" thing or someone might just be gender non-conforming, or that some kids have issues with dresses or pants or even coats!

[@LOREisDEAD]

I mean, my mom told me when I was younger, I tried cutting all my hair off so I could be a boy because boys could do all the cool stuff. And guess what? I'm mascfluid. I think I was like 5/6 when I did that and I really wanted to be a boy 😂

[@mxmissy]

"And if you accidentally call Luna by their old name, make sure to say a big sorry and that you'll do better next time" I know that this TikTok is 'aimed' at kids (I say it like that because well Lily isn't a kids creator and it's not necessarily that deep), but if someone uses the wrong pronouns with me, I'd rather they just go "sorry about that" and move on, instead of "OH MY GOD I AM SO SORRY I MISGENDERED YOU! PLEASE! I AM WORTHLESS!" because you'd be surprised how often that happens. It's embarrassing. Just say you're sorry and move on.

[@juicyblue4625]

I need to add something important here. Just because a girl plays with boy toys (or the other way around) doesn't mean they are questioning their identity. It is a little deeper than that. I've seen this tiktoker use that argument so much, as if tomboys don't exist.

[@SquidSquidSquid_Squid]

As a trans guy, when people sincerely mess up it is not that deep. My friend messes up my pronouns a lot (even name sometimes too) and y'know if I catch it I'll be like "oh dude...." and she corrects herself/apologises, sometimes I'll be a twat about it, but it's a joke and that's because we're friends!!! Also, I think you'd look so nice in a auburn/chestnut coloured top and/or a steel breastplate :)

[@s_sideee]

I love watching your videos while I do whatever lmao, like sweeping with a broomstick, cleaning my room or doing laundry. Keep up the good work, mate!

[@dorobarbie]

26:25 don’t give this guy (the one with the semi-existent mustache) credit or anything he said a lot transphobic stuff and accused a Olympic athlete of being trans as well. He also to talks with a blaccent so if he’s not a red flag then idk.

[@SpaceAce00746]

What's a Blaccent?

[@ms.melody6653]

Ok so it was exactly who I thought it was. I immediately thought it was that guy but wasn't sure since I'm bad at faces.

[@MrsPixie-ni4lb]

Oooh yikes thanks for letting us know!

[@court764]

So glad you rode in on your valiant broomstick to tackle this topic. You were very genuine and supportive of this community while also calling out problematic practices and behavior. Thanks for the diligent work. You have a new subscriber who watched way too much of this video. I really appreciate long-form content. It's a lost art in this world.

[@dartineer4315]

This is a really cool video! I love watching these kinds of videos while I'm doing activities like cleaning or washing dishes, but today, while I was sweeping. My broomstick handle broke, and I had to go buy another broom. :(

[@nyutono]

ur seriously one of my fav commentary channels cuz ur so real, thanks for another peak video :3

[@theta385]

the thing is also the ''mommy i don't wanna wear boy clothes'' does rarely equal ''mommy I'm trans''. clothes don't have a gender as we all know. if you go into a kindergarten right now and ask a little girl what a girl is she will most likely say 'long hair, ress, pink, horse, dolls' same with boys. but the ''thing'' that makes you trans is not the toys you play with or the clothes you like. It's gender/body dysphoria. it often contains the social aspect of ''mommy i don't wann wear boy clothes'' but that is not enough to be classified dysphoria. it's a complex mixture of physical, psychological and social factors. without dysphoria you're not trans. without dysphoria you'd bascially say you chose to be trans. you don't have to call it a disoder if you think thats wrong, but it's interesting that with things like depression or an ED everyone calls for a destigmatisation of the disorder but if someone says ''yea i suffer from the disorder dysphoria where my body does not align with what my head says'' everyone is quick to comment 'no no dyshoria is not a disorder you are not sick you are normal' I find that a bit strange lmoa!! sorry for the long post.. thanks for reading all of it, hope you have a nice rest of the day :)

[@doodlz369]

i did very minimal research as its late here, but many trans people actually dont go through dysphoria, i.e. you can be trans without having dysphoria. more people do suffer from dysphoria, but still, there are some that dont (i personally do, but i have a few enby friends who dont have dysphoria)

[@theta385]

@@doodlz369 I'm sorry then I don't think they should be considered trans. Because what makes them want to transition if they're not dysphoric? The "Aesthetic"? Very problematic being trans is not an aesthetic. The social thing? That's quite sexist there's not one way to be a man/woman. "They are uncomfortable with being the way they are." Yes many are. Therapy helps. And in Therapy you can discover whether transitioning is a thing that helps you because your dislike of being the way you were born is dysphoria. By all means I won't ever dictate the way people see themselves, but the more "nom dysphoric" people say they're trans the more insurance companies will say "hey there's no medical need for them to transition they just want to, so they might as well pay for their medical stuff (therapy, surgery, etc) themselves" I'm honest I'm not from the US so i cannot comment on whatever theyre doing but my country would certainly view it like that.

[@Flameytastic]

Dysphoria is a mental disorder, being trans is not. Saying that as a trans person with dysphoria. Gender dysphoria often causes someone to be trans but also can happen to intersex people and cisgender people along with the fact that trans people don’t always have gender dysphoria. A cisgender female can have gender dysphoria because she doesn’t think she looks girly enough and vise versa. And a trans female can be fine with how she presents masculinely and be fine with her body or maybe she already looked feminine enough so just doesn’t have dysphoria, but she still socially transitioned to a women which makes her trans. It takes a quick google search to disprove that gender dysphoria = being trans but if it helps I study psychology and your comment is very very wrong

[@Flameytastic]

@@theta385being trans isn’t an aesthetic but different gender is, girly and masculine are both aesthetics. And though there’s not one way to be a man or women there are expected ways in society and if a person who was born male decides he wants to socially live as a girl then that’s being trans and dysphoria doesn’t need to be involved

[@theta385]

@@Flameytastic ageed. cis people can have dysphoria too. but that just means every trans person has dysphoria but not everyone with dysphoria is trans. you know, like that every beagle is a dog but not every dog is a beagle.

[@jarvistoasty]

DUDE. I WAS THINKING "This guy looks like Thomas Jefferson" SINCE I FIRST SAW YOU, AND THEN YOU OPEN THE VIDEO WITH THAT 😭

[@jessefinnigan5397]

I'm nonbinary and I consider that trans. Other nonbinary people don't. I think the line is drawn based on the individual. I've always just believed that, aside from how biological sex affects us physically, mentally, and biologically, it's kind of irrelevant. We just love gendering things too much. She almost touches on that kind of pretty well, but then she shoots it all to hell just as quickly.

[@Aperson11028]

I am also nonbinary and like legally I’m pretty sure it’s considered trans

[@b3nt079]

Another enby here: It is considered trans by definition. Transgender is categorized as not identifying as your birth sex - which being Nonbinary is exactly that as well. Anything outside of cisgender would be trans. Genderfluid would be, Agender would be, Bigender, even xenogenders, would be transgender, as you're not identifying as cisgender. It's not limited to being a trans man or woman!

[@Aperson11028]

@@TheBeastOfBeauty not legally sorry like it’s under the trans umbrella

[@mackenziemoore7503]

The Kurt Cobain part got me a bit heated. He's been gone 30 years now, let the guy rest in peace. (Talking about her words not yours, you did a great job remembering him.)

[@theyearofdarian]

This was so informative while also hilarious. I had to stop sweeping & almost dropped my broomstick laughing a few times 😂

[@MeowMeow-ej2iu]

The hate comment that was talking about your slight lisp and hair was so dumb. Your hair is literally stunning!

[@dallas2817]

I really really enjoyed the breakdown of the whole Kurt Cobain situation, I love music history! Especially when it's being so warped to fit someone's own skewed/misinformed narrative, there needs to be an in-depth look at the facts! Good stuff, another classic Dankyjabo broomstick banger!!

[@vixen_j6141]

I cracked up when you kept going Hmmm? 😂 first time seeing any of your content, and I'm here for it!

[@Only-autumn-forever]

Gotta say, I love these long videos so much 😭. Sitting down and watching them are great, keep it up. Lily tinos like broomstick *ehem* and ice cream examples are so weird 😭😭

[@Max-ut4kd]

its not harmful for kids to explore their gender even at that age. lots of people knew they were trans at 4 or 5, and some thought they were trans and later realized they were not, and thats ok too and safe and should be encouraged. kids know more than we think and we should encourage them to explore their gender, even cis children. great video regardless!

[@Max-ut4kd]

while I explored my gender as a teen, ive had friends who transitioned as early as 7 and they knew way before that as well. even some had parents who encouraged this, and they are honestly way better off in terms of confidence, mental wellness, and connection with their family.

[@Iggy253]

I not trying to argue here but for me personally I didn’t know I was genderfluid until last year I’m currently 18 I used to be proud of being a girl but when I became a teenager I started to feel more neutral and when I was 16 I identified as agender but every now and then I would feel like a woman or feel like a man or some where in between or something else.

[@Max-ut4kd]

@@Iggy253 every person's gender experience is different!

[@MystiKalRaven7]

I want to scream: "Omg Lilly you're an expert on YOUR gender identification journey no one else's. Unless you're a childhood sex education specialist or a child psychologist, stop!"

[@willowmoon3461]

Your content is very refreshing. For one thing, you admit that you don’t know everything, but are open to being educated. You demonstrate amazing compassion, whilst providing a balanced approach to very nuanced subject matter. Very glad I found your channel 😊

[@0live0llie]

on trans kids: many kids are highly aware of their gender especially as they move into establishments outside the home (particularly school at that age). some may not be but may feel somewhat out of place until they reach puberty or even adulthood and have the language to describe themselves. so no, i don't think its shocking or wrong that a 5 y/o knows they're trans, especially since by that time they are now exposed to gender roles that may not have been present at home. the only issue would be telling a kid that they are trans, but this is insanely rare (and rhetoric used by transphobes to justify transphobia against children and attacking affirming families). the only transition even available at such a you g age is social, which is 100% reversible. once they reach puberty, they can use puberty blockers if they would like, which are also 100% reversible. im trans and i vaguely understood that since i was very young. however i didnt have the language to describe it and it really wasn't something talked about even then (im 20 now) and grew up in a home and community that didn't really enforce many gender roles. it wasnt until puberty i realized something was really wrong and found the language for it. if i could have had that at a younger age, i would be so much more comfortable now edit: also, uterus transplants HAVE been researched recently, however, they have not been successful yet and i dont believe they've said we're THAT close yet

[@TwinkleTwinkleTruly]

… I’m literally going through a minor gender crisis at 30, and her going “just close your eyes and think about how you feel!” as if it’s that easy for everyone, even people who are still seeing themselves as “mostly” cis. Gender is confusing at any age, that’s why it’s such a complicated topic!

[@WaferTots]

about the diagnosing kids as young as 4, i think its honestly chill if a kid wants to change their name or presentation to what makes them comfortable. giving them autonomy like that is completely fine and its not your job to dictate what their life should be, listening to them is your job

[@adhdlorde]

if she thinks presidents were gay I think she’d be a big fan of the 2017 Hamilton fandom

[@Rue-1991]

I'm no lily fan, but ten min in I can already tell you, it's more respectful to not say sir or maam if you're not sure. Just don't use either. I'm trans non binary, I shouldn't have to announce my gender Everytime I meet someone for them to just leave it alone. Just don't acknowledge gender, say neither. You don't have to say "what would you like to order sir/ma'am/Ms/misses" you can simply say "may I take your order/what would you like to have today" Just stop using gendered terms for strangers, it's very easy unless you're obsessed with others genitals and gender expression. They them has existed in grammar for people you don't know for as long as English has. Someone says "I'm going out with my friend" easy response? "What are you going to do with them?" "What are you two going out to do?" Same thing serving a stranger, "hi how can I help you today?" Doesn't require a gender specific term to end that sentence, it's already complete.

[@Rue-1991]

Also for one single damn second understand that the binary isn't the only option. Ffs Lily's a bitch but between constantly calling gender dysphoria "dysmorphia" and just refusing to acknowledge you don't have to call someone any gender unless you know them and their preferences. Also the dismissal that children can know any level of their gender? I knew at like 5 I hated being called a girl but I had no interest in being a boy either. It all felt wrong to me. I wanted to play in the mud and wear clothes that were as easy as possible. Basically I would have been happy in a creek bed in a potato sack but because I'm afab I was dressed in flowers n pink n stuff frilly dresses or criticized. I just wanted to wear a cotton sack and catch frogs n snake or fish with my bare hands. Probably experiment with what local plants might not kill me. I knew I wasn't a girl, just no one considered that possible n they called me a tomgirl. I had no interest in being a boy. They were n are mostly gross.

[@Rue-1991]

Basically lily sucks but so do you. Will not subscribe. None of us can ever know about Kurt n she sucks for saying he was trans with no concrete proof. But you suck just as much for saying no one knows they're trans until you say it's an appropriate age.

[@_.Brii._]

0:20 DAVEED :DDD

[@PGOuma]

You can scientifically conceptualize your gender at ages 3-4, which is why you hear some trans people saying that they knew since they were 3. Sure, a toddler isn't gonna have the proper vocabulary or know that they're trans but they might feel weird or off about how other people perceive them or even how they perceive themselves. For example, I always felt weird whenever my family referred to me as a girl when I was 3 when I didn't view myself as such.

[@cortaniadams-morris6705]

I know im a little late...recently stumbled across your channel and am currently on a binge now. One thing that bugs me is that my son is always unscrewing my broomstick to use for his forts. I mean, i kinda need it to clean, right? 😉 Anyway, i am really enjoying your commentary! Keep up the great work!

[@scr0mb13s]

20:29 personally, i think that wr should listen to kids opinions when they say they are trans. Like not medically or legally transitioning them but more like just listening to them, and letting them know that identity can be fluid so what they say now can change later, so they dont feel uncomfortable letting me know if they got it wrong. Listening to them does no harm (also im really sick rn so this might be like worded wrong mb)

[@pleasetheresnoneed]

are kids genuinely identifying as trans or are they being told if they like pink and sparkles then maybe they're a girl? does pink and sparkles make a girl? do children even have a nuanced understanding of gender identity to be able to discern this for themselves?

[@scr0mb13s]

@@pleasetheresnoneed sometimes they do know what being trans is and feel it fits for them. If theyre not right its no big deal.

[@kavicorben1777]

​@@pleasetheresnoneedvery often there is a huge distinction between "I want to play with trucks" and "I want to be a boy" While expressions of gender nonconformity are *potential* signs, they're weak evidence on their own, and once the kid says "I think I want to be a boy/girl" or "I don't think I want to be a boy/girl", you give them the space and environment to figure that out, you don't decide it for them, and you give them room to back out if they decide that it's not right for them.

[@scr0mb13s]

@@kavicorben1777yeah thats what i mean!! :))

[@kavicorben1777]

@@scr0mb13s absolutely - I 100% got what you were saying! Unfortunately a lot of the comments pointing out the same thoughts you and I seem to have on the matter are getting this same... Shall we call it, scrutiny, by folks like our friend pleasetheresnoneed here. I'm hopeful that the positive information is rising to the top, though. Comments like yours really help!

[@bj_prjctdd]

as a trans guy i gotta say the whole "YOURE TRANS WHABAM" thing only usually happens after puberty i think, at four i just wanted to be a teenage mutant ninja turtle or something

[@Flameytastic]

That’s not true, also a trans guy and I knew when I was very little that I wasn’t a girl. Please don’t speak for all trans people just because you didn’t personally experience it. It’s a spectrum and everyones trans discovery is different

[@nuttynic0]

⁠@@Flameytasticthey legit says "usually happens after puberty," shutup. js bc u knew u "werent a girl" doesnt make you trans. i was the same, i knew i wasnt a girl, didnt make me trans, i knew i was different, doesnt make me trans. i didnt know what i actually was til 6th grade when i learned what everything was.

[@hrtzz_undrskor]

@@nuttynic0 calm down jesus, there are a bunch of stories of trans kids just look it up

[@bj_prjctdd]

@@Flameytastic oh i wasn't trying to speak for all peoples experience, im sorry it appeared that way; im quite aware my personal one doesn't reflect on everyones, its simply my observation i suppose from my environment--nonetheless im sorry you felt left out of it

[@Flameytastic]

@@nuttynic0 the creator of the comment wasn’t even offended why are you.. I was a trans child. I was diagnosed with gender dysphoria very young. The want to be a gender I wasn’t to where it disabled me I think made me trans. If you don’t consider you feeling that as a child as you being trans that’s fine that’s you, but I was one. At the time I didn’t see the “usually” and the comment was still framed in a way that to me felt they were discounting people who found their discovery earlier, clearly I misread the tone (which is normal for me because I’m autistic and usually read things as more aggressive then they’re meant to be) and I realized that once the creator of the comment responded. I’m not sure why you felt the need to rage to me in the comments over it as if I was attacking anyone.

[@alexkalka2386]

i started singing hamilton as soon as i saw your face on the video hahah, i didnt think you would have actually compare yourself to daveed diggs at the beginning of the video XDDD

[@gobsmr]

Fun fact: There’s been a lot of debate on whether Lily is trans or an autogynephiliac. Whenever a male content creator transitions later in life, autogynephilia accusations are always thrown at them. But Lily has the most I’ve ever seen and, while I’m not going to disrespect her identity, it is a little compelling to believe.

[@1sleepyguy42o]

Autogynophila is not a real thing. That's terf rhetoric.

[@octapotl]

Second comment, but now that I'm at the end of the video I wanted to say its quite refreshing to see someone making a video about her that isn't just using this whole thing as an excuse to be transphobic. I like that you didn't take most of what that subreddit said seriously and i like that you went over Lily's response to the allegations against her without taking things out of context and making her seen even worse than she is. And I'm saying this as a trans guy that's known he wasn't a girl since early elementary school, kids should definitely be able to explore their gender without some adult telling them they aren't (or even are sometimes) transgender, if that makes sense