Prisoners, What Unspoken Rules Between Inmates Exist? (AskReddit)

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[@katherinebeilschmidt4210]

Ah, yes, this will be so useful for me, the 19 year-old girl who cried when she stepped on a snail a week ago

[@dallama2616]

ok Katherine

[@Nycorexti]

Murderer.

[@sebathadah1559]

Oh the poor dear.

[@nahibylopez6801]

Oof

[@xxhenkdehunterx9255]

I would argue that you should be in jail, snail murderer!

[@thebigg8454]

don't waste food, or brag about what you have waiting for you on the outside

[@theginjaninja132]

"He man I have *X* waiting for me on the outside" *becomes prison bitch*

[@peep1476]

papakfmcnados king lmao

[@chucktowne]

Jody got ya girl

[@Wraithfire27]

Don't just touch anyone's dominoes.

[@wu1ming9shi]

Kind of common sense isn't it?

[@williammundey2033]

*Dont Commit Crimes Against Skyrim And Her People*

[@michaelinsomanywords3647]

But what if I’m with the guild, could you then look the other way? (332 gold)

[@kingfrog1266]

@@skoomasnewalt6566 PPPPPHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAAHHAHHAHAHAHHAHA

[@helpme213]

When I first got the game I hit a chicken in I think rookwood or something and was so shocked to see a woman coming at me with a club to beat the living daylights out of me... And now I just mess around in whiterun hitting people and killing them and just running off with the help of my healing spell.

[@davidcook8073]

@@helpme213 riverwood

[@smo-king6504]

@@davidcook8073 like 90% percent of all player unintentionally had to massacrate the whole town in their first run

[@ziggygunz2447]

So basically, like I figured, prison is an intelligent introvert's worst nightmare.

[@tomfoolery7797]

It's like a worse version of public school.

[@SPiderman-rh2zk]

Absolutely

[@hipstyhopsty2685]

yea

[@taelim6599]

Good thing I didn't commit a crime. Except jaywalking. I jaywalked.

[@SPiderman-rh2zk]

I did something fairly menial and stupid but I was remanded in custody until my court case (two and a bit months). It was my first time in trouble full stop tbh and I had no idea what to expect. I trusted too easily and initially when I did get into altercations I wouldn't hit back for fear it'd affect my case somehow. I couldn't hack it. I acted insane and got put in a single cell. after a month, I was put on the vulnerable wing where I found more intellectual people to mix with, but unfortunately also the nonces and mess heads that were in debt and on the wing for their protection. Prison taught me an awful lot of things about people and how different it is inside. Sure I wasn't in for long but those who haven't set foot inside should do so for a couple weeks and then talk to me about it. I refused to become like the other gen pop inmates and still have respect for the Police and the 'system'. I got a community order in the end and that's spent now, I'm glad to put it all behind me tbh.

[@Ch1l1C0nCarnag3]

The thing about not picking on the small guy definitely happens. I am relatively small (weight wise) and so I don't look like someone who can defend themselves. Add onto the fact I am not very confrontational. A guy stole a set of headphones from my cell the day before my release. This was a big mistake on his part. I generally kept to myself so I wasn't on friendly terms with many people on my wing. Somehow word spread around about what he did, probably bragging or some shit. So about an hour after it happened, a few guys I'd never really spoken to before came to my cell asking about what happened. I told them, and they just said "We'll take care of it" and walked off. Within two hours I hear a massive amount of noise coming from the wing, so I poke my head out of my cell, and what do I see? The guy who stole from me, covered in blood, and fighting with a bunch of guards who were dragging him from his cell. Turns out the guys who asked me about what happened got a group together, cornered him in his cell, and beat the shit out of him. Smashing his TV over his head, then just left. Dude, obviously being pissed tried to go on a rampage on the wing, which was the noise I heard. No idea what happened to him after he was taken to The Block (solitary). Was totally worth the £20 headphones to see that spectacle. Since it was one of the few incidents I witnessed during my relatively quiet 6 months,

[@justanotherself3916]

maybe i missed something but why they help you?

[@DHAGSFU]

@@justanotherself3916 if you pick on someone weak you will get beat up

[@omarkharnivall2439]

Good to know because im a frail asian mischief

[@dfkeija8213]

That's respect.

[@deadrussianliberal2897]

@@justanotherself3916 It's not about helping him, it's about punishing the guy who broke the rule.

[@daoodmughal3301]

Canadians seem nice, they say goof instead of bi*ch

[@garrofwar148]

We call each other every word in the book, but some insults are to the untrained eye sound silly come with a lot of weight and actually mean something. Calling somebody a bitch is vulgar sure but it's regular, calling somebody a goof which isn't used regularly actually means something and is way worse then being called a bitch.

[@lollipopchainsaw.]

@@garrofwar148 m8 it's a joke calm down

[@garrofwar148]

@@lollipopchainsaw. Jesus I'm just explaining the seriousness of being called a goof

[@des-ew4hc]

garrofwar148 which u don’t have to cuz it’s a joke

[@gabrielkerr3198]

CultrulAxis64 thanks, but I'm Canadian and the translation is not nice

[@dylantucker5374]

"Remember, licking doorknobs on other planets is illegal" - Spongebob

[@jackschiro6269]

Michele Tucker well I guess I’m getting a life sentence! :Þ

[@BrotherMalMusic]

Lmao what episode was this again?

[@BrotherMalMusic]

Sparkful Sparrow Is that supposed to be the name of the episode?

[@sovb]

That's the worst crime of all. They'll give you TWO death sentences for it. You heard me right, they'll fucking bring you back from the dead then kill you again.

[@BrotherMalMusic]

Mandick The Titty Smithy thanks G

[@actionman9357]

While in prison, (twice), I was called "The Professor" by several of the inmates. I would help tutor the "semi-literate' to improve their reading skills. Many "residents" have about a Fourth Grade reading level. I am also a skilled card player, and several "residents" would partner with me to play cards and gamble, and WIN! I was ALWAYS protected by many of the fellow inmates and I DID NOT "play them" and treated many with respect. In turn, I was respected and protected.

[@jackrobinson9403]

hi professor

[@actionman9357]

@@jackrobinson9403 Hi Jack! (hijack, I bet you get that a lot!) ;- )

[@Bucknasty117]

actionman935 what kind of card games, professor ? Can you go into details with prison gambling ?

[@jackrobinson9403]

@@actionman9357 lol when i went to lessons late back as a kidda, the teachers would say " eee jack ur late " and id piss myself laughing hahaha

[@kiazoblack.566]

That’s pretty amazing professor

[@theeunknown2620]

"Do not accept any gift whatsoever." This guy I know told me about this 1 inmate who went around putting honey buns on the beds of new prisoners. He was about to eat his until another inmate told him that " so and so put that there and if you eat it, it means that you want so and so to have sex with you." He said that not only did he not eat it, he gave him an extra 1 back.

[@jackrobinson9403]

so did he get to fuck the guy who wanted to fuck him instead?

[@stonem0013]

What happens if you eat all the honey buns on the other prisoner's beds as well?

[@pepelepew8147]

@@stonem0013 bro you will get beat up so bad that you might not eat the same way for the rest of your life.

[@geno9456]

@@stonem0013 a bad time I’m guessing….😭

[@stonem0013]

@@geno9456 but your belly would be full of delicious honey buns

[@NGMonocrom]

This will be a little different. Not too many unspoken rules among prisoners and corrections officers. But the big one is: _"Don't go out of your way to give a prisoner a hard time."_ There's a reason for that. If you single out a prisoner and get on his case without a good reason to do so. If you behave unprofessionally towards him. If you treat him differently than other prisoners and make him look bad in front of the others.... He will wait until about 15 minutes, maybe less before shift change is to take place, and then he will act out in a way just dangerous enough to cause a lock-down. That means, all guards have to stay until the situation is over, and then they need to write extra reports regarding the situation. This can literally take several hours. Meaning, as the guard who gave the prisoner a hard time because you just felt like it, you don't get to go home when scheduled. You don't get that hot meal you were looking forward to at the end of your shift. You don't get that amount of sleep you wanted/needed at home. Your plans after work, if you had any, just got cancelled. All because you wanted to push your weight around, and show a particular prisoner whose boss.

[@Alex-jf4ui]

CO here. this is true. we gotta hate everyone the same

[@indoorsandout3022]

I should be getting frequent flier miles for all my time spent in the mental hospital. But you know, it never occurred to me to start an incident right before the orderlies left. That's brilliant! They did shit like eat restaurant food in front of us while we had crappy state food, and if anyone complains, they lock the tv on food network. I really appriciate that idea. If there is a next time (I usually go in about once a year) I will be sure to use that, because fuck assholes.

[@NGMonocrom]

@@indoorsandout3022 Just a quick thing.... That's how it works in prisons. I have no clue if the same procedure applies to mental hospitals.

[@NGMonocrom]

@KDA (G) IDLE I understand what you're saying. And I understand your frustration. But you've got to treat everyone as just a prisoner. Ignoring what their individual charges are.

[@WolfLamborghini]

@@indoorsandout3022 Have you ever thought, you know, instead of going in and doing that lock-down thing, JUST NOT GOING THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE?

[@ratherande]

Video: unspoken rules of prison Me, a suburban white girl who hasn’t gotten in trouble ever: hmmm yes I might need to know these rules

[@ratherande]

lurch321 you’re right I’m gonna go commit a crime now

ratherande Good to hear! Knew you'd come around.

[@stegosaurusstudios401]

@i wonder if you're reading this I genuinely cant tell if you're shitposting or not and I'm scared

[@spongbee6436]

@i wonder if you're reading this box

[@caloreen1992]

What does your skin colour have to do with anything?

[@AuraRift]

Can attest that Scrabble, Checkers, Chess are super serious. Thought I was decent at Chess, not even close. Alright then, what about Checkers, that's a pretty straight forward game I learned as a kid;got wrecked, what even happened. Scrabble then, I've got a decent vocabulary; these MFs literally studying the Scrabble word book to memorize every 2 and 3 letter word to pull some crazy shit, don't even.

[@lyntonfleming]

Pretty sure "Someone tried messing with my friends kid" is an acceptable reason to be locked up, that everyone could get behind, if you have no knowledge of cars.

[@MindBlowerWTF]

@KDA (G) IDLE aren't these cases very public? As in present in media, so they could ask who was it or where?

[@ProfessorxVile]

@@MindBlowerWTF Or they'll just tap you to deal with the next chomo who shows up on the yard, and if they tell you to kill him, you'd better do it

[@vin2404]

crazy how inmates “find god” but won’t hesitate to hurt you

[@sunblooom]

god told them to

[@ethanperez3844]

ever played outlast 2 mate XD

[@estebanb7166]

God is pretty violent.

Esteban B Well, I've heard he's a really nice guy, but he can sometimes have a violent temper--he almost seems bipolar.

[@estebanb7166]

@ The God of the Old Testament acts like a pimp. He uses, abuses, discards. Lord works in mysterious ways. Very mysterious.

[@ShaunDreclin]

Sounds like a wonderful place to rehabilitate people into productive members of society 🤔

[@andrewg4412]

there are actually a ton of programs that set you up for outside life like qualifications, etc

[@blueberry1vom1t]

@@andrewg4412 Yes but the mental damage of being in prison can ruin you. And those programs aren't available throughout the world/country.

[@ShaunDreclin]

@@blueberry1vom1t Yeah anybody who thinks that putting somebody through that kind of psychological torment is going to make them a MORE stable person on the way out than they were on the way in isn't thinking hard enough about it.

[@GentlesirGibbles]

Yeah but what would the Prison Industrial Complex look like if it became an actual place of rehabilitation and not just taking advantage of that sweet 100 manufacturing man hours for a slave wage low cost of 28 dollars ( around 28 cents an hour )

[@amcglockton2]

Shhhh, you’re making too much sense.

[@supernova743]

Don't steal or commit any crimes against other inmates. There is no "getting away" with your transgressions. You can't just move away, there's only so many places to hide from others and usually you're going to have to rely on the protection from others. but then you can't be watched every second of every day.

[@cyberdreame]

Wat happen if someone drop the soap

[@theweepingskull9839]

@@cyberdreame I would assume anyone who sexually assaults another inmate are punished with a longer sentence or something. Rape is illegal, prison or not.

[@itsyaboiexplosion9377]

Zorba Zen then you crouch down to pick it up also look down while you’re doing to be extra sure

[@FormerGovernmentHuman]

You can claim someone is planning to kill/harm you in your wing and they’ll put you in solitary before transferring you. But chances are that the other wing will catch word and bust your head anyways.

[@jenster29]

So.. Don't be a criminal in jail.

[@markgarrett7428]

Man I'd be dead with all those rules about when you can poop. I poop like 5 times a day and there's no stopping it.

[@pinkguy5537]

Wtf are you eating?

[@darinaangelova2882]

5 times a day is a serious health issue... Never mind prison, go to the doctor and stay out of the ER.

[@markgarrett7428]

@@darinaangelova2882 Yeah I've got all sorts of gut problems but luckily I've got some meds

[@darinaangelova2882]

@@markgarrett7428 I'm sorry about that. I hope they help, so you get better and never need them again 😊

[@NewtonSparetire]

It's actually healthy. That means you're body is processing everything you eat hourly and you're running clean.

[@roxasdeviluke317]

And most importannt of all...dont talk about fight club

[@slavsaka9536]

Rule 1 and 2

[@BrotherMalMusic]

Please expound. I've never even seen _Fight Club_ yet.

[@BrotherMalMusic]

lurch321 Yeah I was about to say, I pretty much only hear about it being a classic. You're right though, it can't be for everyone.

[@quinnlaya331]

@ woah that's the nicest I've ever heard someone express their opinion

[@101bajan]

what's even fight club?

[@lildordor197]

Thumbnail is perfect but he probably already broke all these rules

[@RenegadeShepard69]

Yeah its a bit of a late upload for tekashi boi. Oh well...

[@ChocolateEffigy]

Na

[@anerdwhowritesessays9931]

He got filled like a twinkie

[@luging2051]

the weird actor I cannot tell if your a 10 year old fat boy or a 30 year old fat lady

[@anerdwhowritesessays9931]

maybe I'm both (ex files music starts playing)

[@vaasmontenegro481]

Don't call Canadians goof. Can confirm this is a nono

[@mutedgrey]

Goof

Vaas Montenegro What about hoser?

[@vaasmontenegro481]

lurch321 typically only Albertans are hosers so to anyone outside of Alberta, hoser would be offensive

[@roedgroed12]

What about Goofy?

[@bigchungus2990]

What about goofball

[@notnameless3805]

this is very useful for a guy who is even to scared to choose the rude dialogue option on walking dead

[@thebee9907]

I remember staying 2 nights in the countys general population, and when the C.O's did their daily checks... They were so worried about finding stuff in the bunks, that they never noticed the drugs that were taped to the ceiling... Literally rocks of cocaine, and a bunch of pills. Watched inmates put the drugs in the fingers of gloves, snap them against the ground to crushbthe drug, then snort it right behind the C.O. Oh, and also, if someone offers you their spread... Take it, and never offer someone epse to take your serving... Never a good idea to try to be nice like that

[@magmawmoldo1629]

Rule nr 1 : Don't go to prison. Edit : Holy shit thanks for the likes, you guys are awesome.

[@mr.sophistication2461]

Yeah, if I ever go to prison I'll either commit suicide if I can, or I'll try to get into solitary confinement.

[@NewtonSparetire]

Sometimes people get false charges and they just want free labor. Like Texas for example.

[@richsombie]

*nr*

[@japanpanda2179]

@@mr.sophistication2461 Same for me tbh, I can imagine it's a scary place. But I think anyone with our attitude doesn't sound like we'd either commit a crime to begin with, or get sentenced to prison for one we didn't.

[@mr.sophistication2461]

@@japanpanda2179 Haha! Yeah... It's not fear though, but rather the sheer disgust I feel towards the filthy animals in prison. I have committed a couple crimes though, one of which would get me sentenced to 5 years in prison. Thankfully though, I didn't get caught, and there is no evidence that I did it.

[@seanvibing6995]

2:08 it went from try not to make eye contact, don’t give your opinion, and don’t let people borrow stuff to don’t take the lords name in vien😂

[@Yujin4757]

When the soap gets dropped, a hole gets popped...

[@amj.composer]

Never spare a bender, especially if he's warm and tender. (I had my choirmaster say this to me once, holy fuck was he creepy.)

[@NetiNeti-gm5bz]

@@Anomaly-uz9pr a pope who was homophobic turned out raping little boys. Pedos and rapist tend to homophobic and sexist

[@jppitax]

@The Truth hurts Don t need to be racist dude (I m black BTW)

[@deadrussianliberal2897]

@The Truth hurts "I heard"... So, your boyfriend told you that, amirite?

[@deadrussianliberal2897]

@The Truth hurts hence the name

[@maxminton7861]

God... I desperately hope I never have to go to jail.

[@Anonymous-zd1ow]

you and me both, man

The Incredible Hulk If you go to jail, at least the inmates will know not to make you angry!

[@AngryEnby]

Then don’t break the law.

[@TheMisterDarknight]

@@AngryEnby "WOW! WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT" every prisoner

[@AngryEnby]

@@TheMisterDarknight Well if you think about it, people who were smuggling drugs and robbing banks knew they were breaking the law and knew they had a risk of going to jail. So that’s on them.

[@RS-bz1et]

not a prison, but a psych ward, because I can't don't have reddit but feel this could be valuable information. 1. This might have just been the one I was at, but don't say anything if you see someones scars, even if they're bleeding, fresh, especially the old scars. Almost everyone has them. There's no real need to cover them at that point. 2. keep your mouth shut, but your ears open. It's always good to listen, especially when there's drama, but don't participate. Simply nod and confirm you're listening, but don't take sides. 3. Again, might've just been mine because we didn't have that many seats but; there's no "saving a seat" for a friend in the day room. First come, first serve. If you wanna sit by your friend, sit in the floor next to them or in front of them 4. If someone's crying, pretend not to see or ask if they'res anything you can do. Respect their decision if they don't want to talk. 5. Playing off that- unless its a staff member, do not tell anyone else they're crying or even mention it. 6. Bring a couple books, markers, and coloring books/sketchpads before hand, you'll need them. 7. Always offer your leftovers to the pregnant girls first. In mine they only let you get seconds if you were not on UR (unit restriction). 8. Be decent to the staff. 9. Make friends with the janitors or cleaning people. They aren't supposed to be "watching over you" so you can often ask them for items in exchange for favors or other things. 10. DO NOT touch other peoples things. Ever. I made this mistake once with a book, but I was lucky enough that the owner was an overall kind person. 11. Be decent to your roomate. If they've been there longer than you, let them shower first. 12. Get used to threats of strip searching and constant screaming/fights. And that's abt it. Again, some of these might've just been my ward, but hopeful someone found this helpful.

[@xxka0tikkxx]

Generally these translate in any situation where you're stuck around other people 24/7 however, I'd say being nice to "staff" can get you in trouble in jail/prison. Obviously dont go out of your way to be an asshole, but you don't want to be seen being buddy buddy with a CO. Rumors then start about you being a snitch. Other than that, most of what you said would translate over.

[@indoorsandout3022]

Yeah, someone wadded up one of my drawings (crayons were my thing, it looked like a bob ross sunset, but with crayons) and threw it across the room. Soooo... I just glared at them until they apologized. That works great. Whatever you say to someone can't top what they hear from nobody. And I know that one from exp. I had plenty of chill and my only fears were the things that didn't actually exist. I stopped someone from fighting once at the state hospital. They attacked and beat up this one guy, and I just kinda moved out of the way. You know, let the nurses deal with it. But then she came after me, and I stopped her from fighting by telling her I agreed with her and was on her side. She got so confused that she stopped swinging and sat down on the floor to think about it. Then after she was totally calm the nurses tackled her and took her off to the room that nobody wants to think about. Pretty much no reason for that.

[@RS-bz1et]

@@indoorsandout3022 sorry you had to go through that man

[@indoorsandout3022]

@@RS-bz1et No biggie, that's life with Schizophrenia. I'm in about 2 weeks a year on average for med adjustments.

[@elpocakoca120]

Thank you all for sharing! This is really interesting. Thank you.

[@ogun4921]

The biggest rule there could ever be: *Don't go to prison*

[@ogun4921]

@ Sorry, pal!

Matrix Black Eh, don't worry about it! Better late than never.

[@ogun4921]

@Wuanslm Twas just a joke, my friend. Obviously no one has complete control over their own fate and future. We can truly only hope that things go alright in the end.

[@ogun4921]

@ True that!

[@JohnDoe-on6ru]

When I was in we had an unwritten rule that nobody snitched and if ANYONE ever broke that rule we'd take our pillows, corner the guy when nobody was looking and have a big pillow fight with him but it was all of us against him so it was totally unfair, then after he lost we'd tickle him for awhile then run back to our cells before anyone would notice us. Sometimes if the offense was REALLY bad we'd give him a manicure during the night without him even noticing.

[@MHLivestreams]

A bit of humour actually goes a long way in prison, man. You would be just fine.

[@JohnDoe-on6ru]

@@MHLivestreams WOULD be? I WAS IN PRISON, I still have nightmares, like the time the cafeteria was out of vegan food and everyone in the cafeteria cried, we all hugged each other and tried to comfort ourselves.

[@russellmooneyham3334]

Lmao!!!

[@TimpBizkit]

It's okay until the pillow fight involves pressing it over the face until the person runs out of air.

[@AkameGaKillfan777]

"That's the evilest thing I can imagine!" -Mojo Jojo

[@Quintonias]

What this video is telling me is that prison is essentially a post-apocalyptic society.

[@xxboonisbadfortnitexx1549]

Yep

[@xxboonisbadfortnitexx1549]

Lol

[@matildakeith9575]

*me, a rural Christian white girl who feels guilty after killing a tiny ant* hmm, yes, this will be very useful.

[@kukifitte7357]

Get in, you're going to jail for first degree murder on an ant

[@thereisnosanctuary6184]

One ant is a tragedy. A thousand ants is a statistic. Same with people.

Matilda Keith SEEK FORGIVENESS IMMEDIATELY!

[@halamohammed9285]

Who cares tbh.

[@superfox7274]

@@halamohammed9285 the 44 people who gave a like to the comment

[@blobs5440]

I like how all the murderers, kidnappers, robbers, drug dealers, etc. will always be against pedos Edit: Damn, this blew up fast. ThAnKs fOr AlL tHe LiKeS gUyS!

[@zoberajaburz8859]

well obviously, being a pedophile is worse than robbing someone or being a drug dealer

[@blobs5440]

@@zoberajaburz8859 pfft of course

[@Cacowninja]

Taking away a person's life if they didn't deserve it, kidnapping someone, stealing from someone, (okay drug dealing is okay if it's peaceful), still makes them shit. Murder, kidnapping, robbing? That's ok. Touching a kid? RRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! Yeah touching a kid is horrific maybe even worse than murder but prisoners getting on their high horse who have fucking killed innocent people is just disgusting. IT'S STILL BAD! Also prisoners should just mind their own damn business. I mean you're in jail, your only job in to serve your sentence, don't stick your nose in other people's crimes. God some of these people are such demanding assholes.

[@loremipsum5697]

@@Cacowninja Found the kid diddler.

[@Cacowninja]

I'm not a kid diddler so keep using your small mind with those poor detective skills if you insist. I just want people to mind their own business in and out of prison.

[@RagingInsomniac]

69 probably got filled up like a Twinkie in prison Edit: oh almost 700 likes yippee

[@ВиталяКекс-ц6е]

Nice

[@anerdwhowritesessays9931]

Yes

[@AmazingRebel23]

Anyone who wouldn't bang 6ix9ine is frickin gay lmao

[@kittyjadhav4841]

IceBetweenEyeliner why would anyone wanna fuck a child predator w rainbow teeth n hair n weird arse tattoos?

[@allorepink3218]

Trainwreck727 exactly lol

[@thepinkterror2907]

So what I’m hearing is that North American prison systems encourage hostility, and we should convert to the prisons they use in parts of Europe, which have shown to be MUCH more effective at rehabilitation.

[@dorph6407]

Well, yeah, but rehabilitation isn’t profitable, Thepinkterror.

@@dorph6407 You want your tax dollars feeding and housing rapists and murderers? Inmates should be doing back breaking labor for free if you ask me. Forget China when we could be making iPhones right here in the US of A. (Tim Pools beanie bursts into flames).

[@abrahamnotlincoln3439]

@ or maybe do what china is doing with their own prisoners, harvest murders, rapists and pedos for their organs and give it to people who need them ( china is harvesting their prisoners organs )

[@daniel-zh9nj6yn6y]

Norway's prison system was changed in 1968. I couldn't find any data about crime before the change, but I don't think they had the same problems the US has now. If you want to compare, England is the most similar to America. Teenage inmates there go live on KZbin while locked up, they think it's something to be proud about (they're allowed to own smartphones, and they have internet access).

[@vincereterram8150]

@ Lol you don't know how the world/politics work.

[@Laptop46]

It always amazes me how prisons seem to be more civilized in some ways compared to the outside world. Like that thing about shutting the fuck up is something I wish all society knew about.

[@afterdark8485]

As someone who has spent most of their life in prison I can tell you, Prison Mike truly is the scariest thing in there.

[@amberriche30]

Where is prison Mike

[@Addchrist2smite]

I don't know, the dementors were pretty bad.

[@kylebradley3]

What was the food like?

[@christino3852]

Reddit After Dark I thought this was a real type of prison terminology I somehow missed but nope, I just don’t watch The Office.

[@maysn6893]

@@imyrhcklebrry3169 yeah my dad just got back after a 6 year sentence and he cooks meals every day (my fridge literally looks like Gordon Ramsay's right now) and he always says you don't even want to know what they made us eat it'd make you throwup

[@johnblackstone5261]

It's not gay if you look each other in the eyes.

[@squidward8073]

No it's not gay when you say no homo

[@CriticalTechReviews]

@@squidward8073 I'm old school, I thought it wasn't gay unless the balls touched?

[@ABW941]

Aproach opponent, say "no homo", stare him in the eyes, errect testicle to testicle barrier, start to have non gay related man on man prostate stimulation.

[@misterkaos.357]

It's not gay if there's another dude between the two of you #689

[@ABW941]

@@misterkaos.357 That would be gay^2, you need a lesbian inbetween you to make it 0,5 gay, a straight woman will onky get you to 0,7 gayness.

[@beneaththesurface1569]

"Goof" in prison terms means someone in for molesting little boys specifically. As the prisoners were little boys themselves and might have had their lives wrecked by inmates like that, it's no wonder it's the most dangerous insult.

[@MHLivestreams]

is this an american term? in Britain we just call them pedos, or nonces.

[@jaredcrabb]

@@MHLivestreams Apparently the american tern is chomo.

[@darthnihilus3447]

Here's the run down: don't stare, don't snitch, don't steal and pay your debts. Also, don't be put away for crimes involving kids or women. Follow those rules and you'll be ok

[@plaggsa]

Yeah, the looking one is good advice. And funny. In school I looked at my bully and he saw me, he waved in a petty way and I kept staring. I slowly started staring behind him, in which he turned around and was confused. He waved again, the teacher saw him and asked him " why are you waving?"

[@samhayes-astrion]

This just shows the system needs to be improved. Prisons are for rehabilitation, not so much as punishment. The fact prisons have rules like this make me feel prisons aren't doing their job of helping people, and are just producing people worse off than when they went in.

[@Cacowninja]

Ironically they're called "correctional" facilities.

[@vebvin]

Never been to prison or anything but I heard this a lot from other people: DO *NOT* TELL *ANYONE* when you’re getting out. They will try to mess with you and get u in more trouble. Even if you’re getting out that very day, DONT.

[@MHLivestreams]

that's true, iv'e seen people get their cell trashed, pillow pissed on , etc. Best say nothing, and just get out in the morning before anyone else is up.

[@akufromthefuture7159]

In jail, we made everything from rock candy, taffy, various cakes, and the usual (for people in there) dips, burritos, etc with ramen, chili, and various other ingredients all in the microwave. These dudes go to jail/prison and become Gordon Ramsey. I was shocked my first time, as they are like food alchemists. I can't stress enough just HOW creative these guys get. It's magic how much they can make with a microwave.

[@chongology1602]

prisoners: "aight im a man of god now" also prisoners: "lets jump this guy"

[@MHLivestreams]

righteous indignation is a thing, bro.

[@TimpBizkit]

It's that "intermediate stage", where people have a little bit of Christ, but still have most of the tendencies of the devil, like some of the disciples wanting to "call down fire from Heaven" on someone.

[@joselinehernandez1405]

Staying with ur own race couldnt be more true

[@neffyg35]

That's sad:(

[@NewtonSparetire]

But they'll just as easily kill u as breathe

[@joselinehernandez1405]

At least u live longer when u stay with ur race

[@SilentHellVG]

@@neffyg35 Did you expect anything different? They're in prison. A lot of those people probably committed some sort of hate crime.

[@damnsonwheredyoufindthis.3830]

@@SilentHellVG Still kinda dumb in some ways. I get people who have life sentance but who don't shouldn't wanna get a longer one by beating someone to death or near death. Its just gonna add up your time. But then again if no guards snd cameras are around they won't find our who did it.

[@richieamore7557]

Canada has jails?? For what?? Jaywalking??

[@tonyalcaponey]

Yeah. No fortnite dances allowed.

[@daniel-zh9nj6yn6y]

Someone else wrote: to join a Canadian gang, the initiation is bumping into someone and not saying "Sorry !"

[@daniel-zh9nj6yn6y]

I remember a video of a Canadian inmate who died from internal bleeding, after a group beating. He owed some money.

[@HandlelessTML]

I went to county for 3 weeks once and the "be a decent artists" part is true. Once the block learns you can draw, you'll be sketching tattoos and pictures for others to send to their family. By the time I left they'd made a wall of my art lol.

[@MHLivestreams]

it's true, it's a great way to earn tobacco, sugar, biscuits, etc.

[@robertcorbell1006]

Earned me extra snacks such as fruit when in the psych ward.

[@sadrabbit53]

Soooo I can't get decent employment with my skills, but I'll at least get respected in prison...? 💫The More You Know💫

[@thecoolcario9048]

Today I learned that if I go to prison, flush as soon as you crap. Anything else I need to know?

[@killcharge4338]

Yeah if you drop the soap then do not touch it, floors are nasty and that soap flew across the floor .that soap is gone . also hygiene is a must ,if you are buying your soups and twinky but not soap and deodorant then you will have problems. Also you need to buy a lock period, you can lock your stuff and use it for fights which you will get into ,that's just part of it. And if you bump into anyone or need to squeeze by someone then say sorry or pardon me . respect is necessary or you will have problems that you do not wanted

[@thecoolcario9048]

@@killcharge4338 this lucario doesnt want to do hard time. I might run into a machamp with a bad temper

[@japanpanda2179]

@@thecoolcario9048 Yeah, just stay out of trouble...

[@vsgfilmgroup]

@KDA (G) IDLE Well, THAT's not a worry. I don't want to own a prison; I'd rather not be there in the first place.It's a shame; you'd think you'd be able to make time go by faster by talking to people, but apparently that's not a thing you can do.

The Cool Cario Uh...…………...stay out of prison? Can't think of anything else.

[@chloehall4922]

Sees cook county jail My brain: don’t do it, don’t do it! Me at the top of my lungs: *THEY HAD IT COMING THEY HAD IT COMING! THEY ONLY HAD THEMSELVES TO BLAME!*

[@martiniquejunebug2284]

I love the second one, because the Canadians are too polite to consider calling each other any worse insults than "Goof"

[@Knifeys]

lol all the huge man-children in prison... its like 9th grade never ended for some people

[@ziggygunz2447]

Exactly!

[@metalheroify]

Its nothing like that at all. It's the one place a man truly has to be on his toes 24/7. If you let your guard down or speak out of line you very well might die. It's okay not to understand what an actual man is. Plenty of you are incapable of understanding anything beyond your own nauseating little lives.

[@ziggygunz2447]

@@metalheroify LMFAO!

[@justrinat2207]

@@ethan5739 ... Doesn't make it any less true ...

[@lazykranch3205]

Actually alot of them are just being polite and having good manners.

[@jamesduffy965]

Only been in jail. Learn to count cards or at least get good at spades. If you're good at something get something for doing it. Defend yourself, saw an Asain guy bout my size (5"10 150) who was asked to give up his shoes and box (bigger black guy 6"+ 180+)when he refused, he was hit a few times (asain guy) then proceeded to beat the conicness out of the guy.

[@shukri975]

Hypno Toad jail i believe is where you’re held before your court hearing/sentencing. you stay there generally for a day or a bit more ? prison is where you’re held after you get your guilty verdict. thats where the jumpsuits everything is

[@jamesduffy965]

@@shukri975 not far off Jail I'd typically where you wait to go to court, but also houses people who got less then a year+ sentence. Also Prison has levels 1-5 depending how bad of a crime you committed.

[@Cacowninja]

So the Asian guy got his ass kicked?

[@cyndai7324]

@@Cacowninja no the asian guy kicked ass

[@LifeOfFox]

"If you don't help beat a child molester to death the prisoners will turn on you thinking you're a sympathizer" Very next post: "Dont ever get involved if people if people are fighting"

[@loyaltyovereverything7675]

You dont ask what they're in for. You dont watch fights if they're in cells. Prison is not jail!

[@alexg3911]

The one about inmates making up lies about your case won't work where i live, since by law in sweden you can't get a shorter sentence for testifying against someone else

[@blueberry1vom1t]

The american prison system is a lovecraftian nightmare.

[@alexg3911]

@Tt Miller youre going of one case and judging the entire system... Rocky didnt even go to prison And trust me, the amount of innocent people in american prisons are far greater than in swedish prisons

[@vargpooperness2519]

Are we just gonna ignore 6ix9ine in the thumbnail? 💀

[@ParkerTheSlayerClips]

Don't. Drop. The. Soap.

[@gingerflid3221]

Ah bro I watch it vids 😃

[@EvilFookaire]

Pft, dropping it is fine. Just don't be the idiot who tries to pick it up, because it won't be shampoo that's oozing out your ass afterwards.

[@NetiNeti-gm5bz]

But that's how gay people survive in prison

[@butternutyeeetsbanana.-.5389]

Karma - Real Voice r/AskReddit Stories lol I what i got from that is dont drop the soup lol

[@NotACutie]

Give it a few years and you'll be doing it on purpose.

[@bearshunnypot302]

I ever go to jail, I'mma be sitting in the corner doodling, not talking to anyone unless they ask... Then I'mma wait for them to line up for tattoos lol.

[@zazygaming6970]

6:48 don’t get involved in people’s feuds/ fights. Story before: get involved, you don’t want to be labeled as sympathetic. Me: WELL WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO?!?

[@aickavon]

that's why you keep an ear out for drama. Figure out who the pedophile is. Show no sympathy for them.

[@Anonymous-zd1ow]

EXACTLY

[@ameliakyle7054]

You are oversimplifying it a bit, the story before says to absolutely join in on beating a pedophile but the story after is saying stay out of other people's drama, basically unless it's a pedophile it's not your drama, stay out of it, if they are a pedophile that's EVERYONE's drama.

[@mankind-redefined1982]

I feel like it's beyond ridiculous that our prison system is so backward and broken that people have to treat it as if it's a desert island wherein there are complex webs of rules and expectations you must follow in order to *literally survive.* Absolutely unacceptable, in my opinion.

[@evermoreonline3537]

2:07 Um. I’ve been using that eye contact one since first grade. ...

[@werewolf4358]

Perfect, just learn to flush while crapping and you're all ready for your first day of prison.

[@zkmk8593]

I was with my friend, and we talked to his dad, who went to jail. He basically jist clarified common steryotypes. When we got to the drop the soap one, he said "That doesnt happen alot, and if you try it you will be harshly shunned and/or beaten up"

[@MHLivestreams]

communal showers aren't a thing in Britain anymore.

[@Chosinn]

Inmate 1: "Hey! Welcome to C block, my guy. Whatcha' in for, eh?" Inmate 2: "Ohhh you know... I done goof'd up, yah..." Inmate 1: *Lights up a rip and cracks knuckles* ".......Say what now, bud?"

[@jakesweet1000]

ahhh what a great way to reform criminals.

[@kalisahhhh]

My grandfather used to give my mom snack money when she was in prison and she’d share with everybody. She was so chill with everyone, even the black girls were braiding her hair.

[@Grimmy41]

I have a feeling that this will go like: "Never went to prision or jail, but..." "Never broke any law, but..." "Not a human and not on Earth, but..."

[@Alex-jf4ui]

CO/guard here: heres some more. Don't mess with count, dont mess with the CO, dont get loud, and if youre gonna hussle do it slick. be good for it or be good at it. cussing a CO or getting my attention is a no no. let me do my rounds and get me out of your area so you can go back to whatever it was you were doing. dudes will get beat up because they werent ready for count or are cussing me and i go to that area and search it. Ideally they want me to do the bare minimum of my job and get me out of the way. they try to fly under the radar as much as possible so they can get away with breaking the rules. Respect is huge and worth its weight in gold. Never disrespect someone and not expect to fight, that includes disrespecting guards. its kinda wierd but on the surface level at least we maintain a pleasant respectful demeanor with each other even though the inmate might hate me and vice versa.

[@iphonecharger2707]

basically what i learned from the video: learn how to hold in your tears if something upsets you, don't be polite if they aren't (sometimes) if you're unable to fight or unable to defend yourself, don't act tough flush while you shit never steal (sometimes) respect saying grace with gang members and don't say the lord's name in vain don't talk about your sentence to anyone always be careful about who you talk to try your hardest not to offend anyone who looks like they can beat you in a fight don't hold eye contact with someone who looks tougher than you, but don't avoid it either. be neutral don't make friends with the guards *in conclusion* prisoners are like wolves and once you are a prisoner, you are a wolf respect the alpha and drink your yahoos

[@unbothered.186]

Exactly!😉

[@918kickinwing]

Cellies help other cellies. I spent a weekend in the general population. My celly (over 40 years old) was finishing 90 days as I was spending my first night. He chatted it up, and gave me the rundown on rules and whatnot. While talking, another inmate came by the cell and asked for his stuff. He just said “I gotta take care of my celly.” No issues or anything. The pod was cool and the only time it got crazy was when the trustees would come by and get made fun of. So while getting out, i gave my things to the inmate next to me bc I didn’t have a celly. I didn’t intend to break precedent but I also didn’t want waste food or items that were needed.

[@michaelsoares5908]

0:34 BAH! A Lannister always pays his debts!

[@jackmack4181]

I remember a murder case where the murderers killed a few kids and when they were sent to prison nearly every prisoner attacked them for hurting a child

[@ErwinSchrodinger64]

So the prison system has adopted particle physics language, like "nuetron", into their vernacular.

[@americanpig-dog7051]

I heard if you tell everyone you're in there for kiddy diddling they'll know you're not violent and just leave you alone.

[@totenkopfan6296]

Is this… sarcasm? I heard they kill pedos in prison

[@darinaangelova2882]

LOL

[@speedandpower2808]

Totenkopf ßänß heavy sarcasm

[@maniacalshowz8284]

Don't call anyone a "Chomo" means child molester >source half brother's mom is a correctional officer

[@bro...whyyoudomelikedis]

Never. EVER try to be a bigshot. These people aren't highschool students they're hardened criminals and would definitely see through you.

[@Anna-zp1ok]

I don't know why I watch this, I feel guilty for taking free samples without asking first.

[@vbgvbg1133]

This will help me, a goody-two shoes boy whose heart rate jumps to 1000 beats per second when i do something even remotely against the rules.

[@lucky-lu6tc]

its very interesting but also very shocking to hear that as a northern european in our prisons there is rarely violence/racism and after inmates get out there is a way higher chance they get back on the right track rather than going back to prison for something stupid like it is in the usa your prison systhem just creates more violence and criminals... the core of your justice sythem is so rotten... i dunno correct me if you think im wrong

[@jaredcrabb]

Yeah, our justice system (and honestly society in general) is so fucked.

[@technobabble123]

That's because your prisons are designed to rehabilitate. Here in America, there are people who have a vested interest in making sure prisons are as full as possible, and that anyone who gets released eventually gets sent back. It's because most prisons in the US are privately owned, and thus, are run as businesses. And any good business owner would want business to be booming.

[@satan3090]

Farting in locked cell is a no no hold it or quietly let it out and hope it don't smell.

[@ReformedCatfish]

@@spockgirltrekkie7135 prisoner: *farts* Other prisoner: *proceeds to beat the life out of the farter*

[@gabrielegr8282]

I hope i never go to prison but hey, just in case, i'll learn how to tattoo.

[@Grayfox988]

Here's what you do when you arrive in prison if you don't want to get fucked with: 1: find the biggest baddest dude in there 2: step up to him and suddenly knock him out with a single punch 3: you just earned everyone's respect as a fearless tough guy After that of course they'll all stomp you to death three times over.

[@Tarik360]

United States prisons make me wonder if they could be a huge study on group organization and perhaps even anthropology. Like how men form tribes and what not.

[@jodieyoder5906]

So basically don't do anything but don't do to little and be inconspicuous but not to inconspicuous this is giving me anxiety

[@zwakblaze3596]

If you drop Cpt. Soap you will have to pay a Cpt. Price

[@TheCrimsonCake]

This sh*t must be f*ching scary, like you could get the piss knocked out of you at anytime.

[@zannatirajib5157]

Prisoner: I got sent to jail for murder White prisoner: I got sent to jail for saying the N word Prisoner: wait that's illegal

[@paulmares9815]

Those 'rules' are absolutely mental. How is it possible dangerous inmates are permitted to interact with other prisoners!?

[@lizardplant5351]

How about you find out by going to prison?

[@paulmares9815]

@@lizardplant5351 How is that question relevant or how would that change anything? My question remains the same; how is all that permitted? All the guards all corrupt or something?

[@CupidRed40]

Ah, yes this is what a wholesome teenager needs to know

[@incensejesus]

“Don’t talk about what you’re in for” actually no, you do. Unless you’ve harmed a child. The inmates have various ways of finding out anyways, so you might as well say it. Otherwise you’re going to look hella suspect until they find out. Obviously only if your case is closed and all that

[@EmpanadaDeCaca]

This. Dont lie about your case like that dude told in the post about stealing expensive cars. Inmates will find out and it will be worse.

[@AkameGaKillfan777]

I've heard this too.

[@darinaangelova2882]

Is there some unspoken rule about giving away some of your stuff before you leave as you will be free and won't need it anymore, but it's very valuable for the people still inside?

[@Alex-jf4ui]

A lot of people wont even talk about when theyre getting released. this is because they will be targeted and pressed for items and the ones doing it know that the guy wont fight back or else he could lose his release date. some do but its generally not a good idea.

[@slenderminion289]

I don't ever want to experience it myself, but the prison life between inmates is really fascinating to me. It's almost like a completely different civilization, confined to a few buildings and rooms.

[@Aya010]

Who do you stay with if there's no one of your race?

[@godgodson1765]

Black or Other

[@alexpollock6932]

Goof being fighting words in a Canadian prison is the funniest thing in the world. I know what It means but it’s still funny when you don’t know the context. Also pretty funny even with context

[@bradleybirman6568]

my uncle told me about his time in prison he also taught me 4 moves he used in prison that stopped other inmates from beating him up told me that he used those moves, kept his head down and never irritated anyone enough to warrant being stabbed. he would have to do this a couple of times, every time he went to a new prison or block he then showed me a way he learned to defend himself to lessen the pain from a beating then i spent 3 weeks learning how to "walk" so i don't offend people, the type of people i should avoid and the type to be near at the end of the 3 weeks i was told i wouldn't survive prison and if i do get sent to find a tough m*therf*cker an become his b*tch or bulk the F up till my muscles have muscles or i wouldn't last a week before i get shanked now i'm to scared to even be near drugs that aren't given by a doctor and i'm uncomfortable being in a store alone. i also am afraid to speak near a cop and always make sure to never answer more then asked and to keep it as short as possible i also avoid trouble like the plague

[@ClipsofFury]

Bradley Birman what do you mean by (4) moves?

[@MHLivestreams]

last time i was in jail, 3 guys got shanked, and one got slashed.

[@jaredcrabb]

Hell, Im uncomfortable just being outside alone, especially at night. And Im a man.

[@papamilfz1565]

That "dont back down" thing depends on the area. Some people will challenge you to a physical challenge and then beat you up after you're tired.

[@petetrask8121]

Man prison sounds so racist. We need to spread the message of equality and inclusion in our prisons! I'm sure if they had a field-day style event with sack races, slip&slides, and popcorn these guys would all get along and learn that value of teamwork and togetherness, and everyone would get along.

[@TheMightyKinkle]

Are there prisons for "nice" criminals like hackers, mild fraudsters, people caught speeding etc?

[@AkameGaKillfan777]

Just jail

[@slimyfurby]

2:16 that's gonna be hard for me to keep in...

[@alexfreetime9597]

It makes me laugh that they're so strict with their "rules" while they're in, if they actually gave two shits about such things they wouldn't be locked in in the first place.

[@slcc5005]

The first rule is only if you’re locked up on the West Coast, I hear East Coast is different