How To Deal With Difficult People | Life Skills To Know!

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[@nataliemarie4640]

I would love a video about emotional intelligence

[@sandycheeks2539]

Me too!

[@irinaioanadiaconu8879]

Same here!

[@alikruger6030]

Yaassss please

[@Gracie-ll7lw]

Yes a video about EI would be great

[@dianakinyasi7487]

Yes

[@judyb2199]

I will just say Thank you to them now (and do what I decide to).

[@teriwalls4169]

We all need to hear this, thank you ❤️

[@jeannfav2921]

Helpful video. Very helpful. Thank you

[@jeny1312]

You’re describing my narcissistic mother who also gossips behind everyone’s back, tries to bait me into arguments and bellyaches about everything under the sun. I’m kind of amazed that I turned out okay considering the mother who “raised” me.

[@doctormimi9486]

You’re describing me as well and I feel it has made me ‘needy’ -yuck--I talk too much and want others to like me far too much and ….ugh

[@JohnSmith86132]

Tracy, you hit it right on the head the inner dialogue "this person thinks I am incompetent"... I am so guilty of over-analyzing what people's intentions are with their words, but you are so right the idea that it's all about them and has little to do with me.

[@oceansaturn]

Last night I prayed for patience and wisdom to deal with my difficult person. This morning I woke up to this video in my feed. Perfect timing. Thank you!

[@pja546]

Prayer works! I'm sorry to say that I often forget to pray when I know I'm going to be around difficult people, but listen the the gremlins in my head. Thank you for the reminder.

[@lyncrafts316]

Dear Tracy, please do a video on Emotional Intelligence and how to avoid ppl who have low EQ. Thanks. Also can you please do a video on quiet shutdown when the other person is scolding or condeming you. I tend to shutdown when my spouse is being verbal and he hates being interrupted but interrupts me when I say something. Thanks dear. Stay blessed and stay safe. From, Marilyn from Malaysia.

[@marymarks7046]

I know that feeling. I took the ELI Assessment with Tracy and it's an eye opener. It helped me to figure out what I need to do on how I show up, how I can improve and follow Tracy on Instagram to see her stories. She has so many nuggets to share if you are unable to afford coaching. I will get to a point financially so that I can reach out to Tracy for coaching she is the real deal. There is nothing better than having someone directly coaching you, setting goals to maintain positive growth in dealing with every aspect of ones life.

[@lolakathol4109]

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[@athena3865]

Divorce works.

[@innerpeace528]

As a person who plans my day down to the last minute, I prepare for interactions with people who might be negative. I’ve learned to limit the interaction as much as possible.

[@oliviawinegeart6129]

Tracy, this is golden advice and extremely liberating. And the beautiful thing is there is a shift happening in our schools! I teach second grade and even at this age social emotional skills are now a part of our standards and even on our grade cards. We have daily lessons. Good things are coming!

[@dazed_and_amazed1296]

So happy to hear this!

[@cathyzhang2769]

Great video. My experience is that the freedom of being far away from difficult people is far greater than any benefits you may inherit from associating with them.Don't even think of making a team with them. Avoid if you can. They will damage you if you ever challenge them.

[@michelleforsberg5769]

Would love to see more low EQ videos!

[@KarenGarcia-rg4or]

Don't allow anyone to manipulate your emotions...be in charge of your faculties! We can't control all the situations around us, so we definitely need to keep our inner dimensions the way we want them...no more huffing and puffing! Coach yourself out of that!!! :) Be Happy!!!!!!

[@MagsChase1229]

Karen, I agree. Hold tight to that inner strength and if possible get away from them. Mine is the big wedding or bridal showers. Ugg, who will I have to be seated with? A thing I do is, I stand up, to head to restroom just as they start a difficult, boring conversation. My child is now an adult and busy with college. She told me, "I'm not going to those things. Twice at showers, she was told she had to sit with cousins....that weren't her cousins or was so much older. She 16, they 30 yr w/ infant. She was outraged, furious. I had to sit w/ the table I was assigned to. Hmm. It was ok with me, yet I kept going over to her. I wish I knew this info back then. She told me she will not attend this coming summer and nor does she want these family members to know where she is or what she is doing.

[@ppia5700]

Please create a video on emotional intelligence!! Thank you for all of your amazing guidance Tracy.❤❤❤

[@ppia5700]

This video is amazing. Please create a video on EQ, so many low EQ people I interact with on a daily basis and I need your guidance!❤

[@colleenpowell5324]

Yes, please tell us more about Emotional Intelligence.

[@CherryBerryFashion]

Low EQ Giving unsolicited advice Thinking that if my wife did sth then you must like the same thing too Always relating things to their own experience as a measurement for what’s “right” Constantly interrupting people Always talking about themselves They don’t like asking about you & When they do ask you about sth it’s most likely sth they want to challenge you on How to deal with it: When they show up as themselves - belive them Don’t take it personally - if you wouldn’t go to them for advice in that area then just ignore it - one ear in out the other When they ask you about sth like why you do things “in such a way” just chime in and ask them about themselves - they will love to talk about themselves Holding space for their perspectives and their limiting beliefs Our agenda shouldn’t be to fix them, to change them, to make them see things our way. - cause that’s just the same thing Just accept them where they’re at Highly emotional intelligent people don’t need to challenge one another back and forth

[@rachelblevins5775]

Seeing the title of this video reminded me of an episode of The Office in which Phyllis googles article about “how to deal with difficult people” because Angela is being horrible to her. Lol

[@sable747]

yet, Phyllis gives out "great" unsolicited advice! LOL!

[@lauraneaves6912]

EQ is so needed in the world!! I thought of you last weekend when my husband and I went hiking. The trail we chose was a creek bed and was basically covered in ice for the first part of the hike. Many hikers were using poles or had boots with small spikes on them, we did not. No problem; we maneuvered our way around and slided/shuffled through the challenging icy parts, the rest of the hike was flat and fine. Near the end there was a more challenging icy upwards part. There were two women hiking towards us on the way down. Without skipping a beat as she passed me, she said: "You can't do that without spikes." It's like her thoughts just came out, almost under her breath. It was so funny to hear her say that. As in "just because it was challenging for me or because I couldn't, neither can you!!!" Just matter of factly - YOU CAN'T. We continued on and this part of the trail was not an issue for us. Just very interesting....they're all around us! Don't let others EVER limit you!!! 🙌👊

[@TracyHensel]

Perfect example of low Emotional Intelligence. Thanks for sharing!

[@ladysilverswirl5588]

LOL, reminds me of the hike I just went on in the Smoky Mountains. TN is my home state and I have grown up surrounded by woods my whole life. We have a 400 acre farm but brown bears are just slightly out of territory here, by about an hour. So needless to say I was excited for the chance to see one in nature. I came around a bend on the most popular trail in the smokies and right smack dab walked in front of me a juvenile bear. Not a baby and small enough to be worried about mama being behind, but a small timid young adult. I stuck my arm out to stop my travel partner, and stepped about one step closer and pointed in a hushed tone so we coule stay a safe distance away to observe without scarring the animal away. A scared idiot tourist with his family was standing on the other side of the trail wide eyed. He immediately looked at me and shouted BEAR, BEAR, freaking completely out. I had already stopped and was clearly very aware of the creature. The man behind me on the trail did the exact same thing as us, stopped quitely and watched as we warned him. The typical idiot tourist family was the only one making any fuss. The funny thing is the man was walking past and saying wow thay was close that was a pretty good sized bear lol, when it was very small and 100% minding its own business. Some people are just clueless and out of their element in nature, and that woman you spoke of and the man probably both walked away thinking wow I really saved their skin when they were the ones over estimating their own abilities.

[@jeanneflynn8657]

I love the emotional delivery you express behind your truly impactful messages. It really resonates with me. Thank you so much for doing what you do, every day!

[@wigglebolt4079]

Wish I could like every word a million times!

[@debbietalish2968]

Hi Tracy, this was an amazing video today! I got so much out of it and would love to see a video on low emotional intelligence. Thank you!! 😘

[@fritziskunterbunteschaos9173]

After having a run in with one of those people in my life just this weekend and having been badly derailed by it emotionally because I wasn't prepared, I really needed to hear this today.

[@marymarks7046]

QTIP is one of my favorite acronyms. Love these nuggets Tracy. Best use of my morning break to listen to Tracy.

[@tinarobinson6448]

I wish unsolicited advice was all my difficult people/family did!! I am dealing with much more unacceptable behavior than that. 🤣🤣

[@dradicicorina3090]

Amazing video! Thank you so much, Tracy! 💕

[@deannawebb6772]

Tracy I noticed that you talk with your hands as you speak and I to am a hand talker as I speak but I get made fun of by many people for it. Does it say something about us hand speakers vs none hand speakers? ☺️

[@TracyHensel]

Hi Deanna! Yes, using your hands when speaking does say something about the speaker. We are more engaging and entertaining. Those that make fun of you could be jealous as they are less engaging and entertaining and therefore have insecurities around it. Let's face it, most people want to be like us, as we are pleasurable to engage with. Have a GREAT week!

[@MagsChase1229]

You go Deanna, you talk anyway you would like to. God Bless you for being so engaging as you are.

[@thlp6872]

Thank you for this video. Unfortunately, my biggest critic is my dad. Dealing with him is an exercise in futility. Always heavy and alway uncomfortable. Working through it and knowing i will be stronger from the experience. Yes, please do a video on EQ. How about not taking on the emotions of someone else when they are in a bad mood or expressing negative energy? Is it the same thing? Love your sweater and 💄 lippie..

[@TracyHensel]

Thank you! Very common to hear a parent. While they mean well, generally their advice is coming from their own experiences, not yours. It's their negative inner voice and GAIL's showing up. GAILS: Gremlin / Assumptions / Interpretations / Limited Beliefs from their life, not yours. Once you recognize this, you will be less bothered when he offers you advice and you will know what to retain and what to let go in one ear and out the other. Same with a person's bad mood and negative energy - it's about them, not you. Good Luck!

[@pennyhare925]

Thank goodness for you! Grew up with out EQ people now I’m eating this up like candy !!

[@jaylaw.7660]

You know it just hurts so bad, because it’s your family you know! (Mom &dad)

[@leannebeer3401]

Hi Tracy, Good topic i would like to know more about emotional intelligence.

[@jaymeeh7894]

I can’t tell you how much I needed this video this morning. Thank you!

[@AntonioRobertoFreitas]

Today is really a special day and should always be celebrated with joy and admiration. Gradually we understand the incredible values ​​of women. Regardless of social class, culture or region, women have a fantastic, necessary and unparalleled value in the society around them. In addition to the natural gifts of the human being, the woman has a feminine natural intuition, feeling, she can see where we men cannot see. The woman positively impacts the environments where she passes, with wisdom and knowledge, brings life to light. Happy International Women's Day!

[@TracyHensel]

Thank you Antonio!

[@robinmoser7343]

I was looking for this target advice and I knew you could address it somewhere! Perfect! Thank you!

[@Iris-jm1pe]

great great great video!!! So many insights! I’m loving your videos, Tracy, just found you, so glad I did!

[@tinan266]

The way you talk about it with grace is much appreciated. So encouraging and helpful! I would love to have this making into a series ("how to deal with" for example)

[@robinmoser7343]

Thank you for the technique of changing the subject. Moving them on or shorting the exposure to their boundary invasions.

[@saintinlower48]

I don't know why I'm not smart like you are in all these topics you discuss! 😅 But I'm not, so I need you to help. I've prayed to let go of a woman's mean comments to me about my socially struggling 15 year old son who has health issues he suffers from daily. And have had a hard time. It happened 2 weeks ago, I did not respond in an unlady-like way, but my heart hurts. And I know as a Christian that I am to forgive. You may be an answer to help me let go. God bless.

[@rachellerockel]

Please do more videos on developing IQ and how to respond to manipulative people. Also how to communicate boundaries. Thanks!

[@themalachilife6752]

I love that- “would you go to that person for advice?” No! #1believe #2 Q-T-I-P love this needed this... God bless 👩🏽‍💻

[@DoeRaeMe]

Your tips are a God send!!!! I wanna be a classy lady, even in the difficult situations💃

[@vidalavi6086]

Pls do a video on low EQ thank you in advance

[@nenameza2982]

I am new to your channel, I love it 😍 very much. This video for me is one of the best. However, I have watch only a few.🌹

[@ericanorris3101]

This is a fantastic video! I have watched it several times depending on which relationships I need help with.

[@elizabetha9630]

Thanks Tracy, loved this video! Felt like you were talking about one of my colleagues hitting every nail on the head!! I found this so helpful and would love a video on Emotional Intelligence.

[@sheriparnell3944]

I have learned so much from you! You’re such a classy beautiful lady! ❤️

[@jillcassill8743]

I would love a video about EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE also..

[@lindawright5984]

It’s also how they talk to us. My mom talks to me in a hateful way and tone. Her sister even asks why she treats me that way.

[@ashwinapatel109]

Hello Tracy. I live in UK. Can I still get advice and help. Please let me know. I await to hear from you. AP

[@TracyHensel]

I coach globally. Yes, I would be happy to help.

[@ursulamullikin4723]

Wow I can't believe how many women and it is mostly women here that want a video on low EQ , so we are all aware of what we are lacking

[@marieleemcgill5011]

Everyone feels like they should give me advice all the time unsolicited advice all

[@YoYo-nt7yf]

Yes sometimeswe cant really move on And here I am now doig the best I can.

[@stacylbrewer]

Thanks Tracy, for the wonderful advice. I'm trying so hard to get rid of ppl like this who are in my life. Of course, if it's a family member, this may be nearly impossible to do. PS. I'd LOVE to learn more about emotional IQ

[@Fahim_Lalani]

❤what an amazing video thank you 🙏 friend

[@Avoid_Low_Frequency]

PLEASE do EQ videos!!!!!

[@nene-b6p]

Thank you for reminding me that I still need to work on myself, I needed this! xo

[@RealTerresa]

Please do another video on low EQ! I have been navigating this with family members and I've been letting it drain me.

[@thejajane7803]

Great content.... please vid on emotional intellj gence

[@alejandracamacho3902]

It’s very hard listening to unsolicited advice.

[@cindywiemers9149]

Great information Tracy! Yes I would love to see a video about emotional intelligence. Thanks! Cindy 💗🌻

[@nelsonquinney1520]

Outstanding Great Stories Tracy For Beautiful Day

[@Jamie-mq1bh]

Would love to hear more on EQ. Especially if someone has a high EQ but still pushes their opinions? I know that high IQ does not always mean high EQ, and just because they are in that field of study doesn’t give an automatic high EQ. But I truly believe this person to have a very high EQ. For example- I have a very successful person in my life who has several Masters degrees and is a very high up social worker. I would go to them for advice, but they are also someone that offers advice unsolicited. However, they are not a person that I am extremely close to or really even ask their advice so it’s not someone that has “free range” to give me advice like a sibling or parent, if that makes sense. Years ago I made a general post about my partner and how I loved that he was reading to our niece. This person private messaged me, unsolicited, and said that they “love my excitement but be careful about how much and what I share about my relationship because people take it as an opening to share their opinions” I never shared anything extremely personal(still don’t) and the fact that they messaged me based on a post that was SO general goes to show they just wanted their own voice to be heard. I responded gracefully and let it go in one ear and out the other because I knew I was NOT oversharing about my relationship, even in the slightest. However, I did feel the need to explain myself to them at the time. I wouldn’t feel the need to explain myself these days. Though I let it go in one ear and out the other, their message is something that I think about very often because, ironically, to this day(several years later)they are still the ONLY person that has ever offered us unsolicited advice about my marriage. 🙃 I think it truly comes from a place of love, but many people that know this person agree that their delivery comes across as cocky not confident and the “I’m better than you, smarter than you and know it all, so here is my advice and you should take it” type demeanor. So I’d love to hear how EQ relates to those types of situations!

[@TracyHensel]

Although I have a few thoughts and yes, this would be a display of lower EQ, you nailed it when you said that you believe this person just needed her voice to be heard. Often that is all that it is and it comes from a place of not seeing their own worth and value - Gremlin message. Glad you let it go in one ear and out the other.

[@kellihammond4956]

Yes...i would love an emotional intelligence video.

[@chantalouellet8421]

I love you so much, Tracy,, for all the good that you bring into my Life ! 💕

[@Tina_Pedirn96]

Such a strong amazing woman. Thank you for your words

[@salimanathoo1441]

Please can you do a video on low emotional inteligence

[@SarahDial-f5x]

Please do another video on low EQ!

[@marieleemcgill5011]

I need it now , but really needed it when I worked

[@b.Oraelosi]

Ugh. This video is so good and what I needed.

[@lindseye2750]

Would love the video about emotional intelligence please

[@heatheruptigrove3056]

Oh! How I needed this!?! Perfect timing!

[@julias8763]

Happy International Women’s Day, Tracy!!!! Thank you for the video!😍😍🥰

[@TracyHensel]

Thank you Julia!

[@nataliakralikova9436]

Thank you from Slovakia.

[@mjj5039]

Yes, please do a video on the areas of low EQ.

[@alinemf404]

I needed this video. Thank you

[@Avoid_Low_Frequency]

I love my Tracy friend!!!!

[@sabamuzaffar4217]

Please make one on emotional intelligence

[@dawna-ba-da-bing]

Love your hair in this video!

[@sharikabamjan416]

Take them for who they are..💜😍

[@sable747]

This one was exactly what I needed to hear. Tracy, you mentioned a while back (maybe, on IG?) that if you were doing all that you did now when your children were young that your parenting would have suffered. This was a lightening bolt to me. How do you determine if the timing is off or the gremlin is telling you to "play small"?

[@TracyHensel]

Great topic. Everyone's situation will be unique to them. In coaching, we would peel back that layer to find out if the timing is off or the gremlin is telling you to play small.

[@brendabrown7130]

Don’t have instagram.

[@sharonw.2589]

Great topic! Would love to see more videos on EQ. Thanks Tracy 😊.

[@merariquezada9034]

OMG. I have low EQ!! Do you have a video on how to change this?

[@TracyHensel]

The first step is to identify it. Good for you in recognizing that you have low emotional intelligence. Working with a certified coach can help tremendously. Working with a coach experienced in EQ, attitude, and energy is important.

[@susanhouston5501]

Really enjoyed this. How did you get your knowledge on all this?

[@TracyHensel]

Thank you - A lot studying and observations.

[@paulahatcher150]

How about getting along with your adult daughter? The struggle is real😩

[@TracyHensel]

Would love to help.

[@brendabrown7130]

What are you to do with a person that is ALWAYS coming to you with their problems and emotional upsets or situations?

[@TracyHensel]

Quit saying yes to it. This is on you, not them. They believe you for showing them who you are. Show them something different. Check out my Instagram Story today. I addressed your question in more detail because it's a common thread with people.

[@lw1959]

Yes, videos on EQ!!

[@KathyCrampton]

I also would love advice

[@R.A.A.1980]

So good! Do you tend to set boundaries or simply steer clear?

[@TracyHensel]

All relationships are different.

[@tamerajackson2432]

Excellent video 💕

[@lynnpatterson5285]

Yes a video on Emotional intelligence.

[@sarahmichelle6385]

great colour on you x

[@karenmiller998]

I'm searching for videos on sarcasm. Why are people sarcastic towards others. Sometimes they try to be funny, but it's a sarcastic comment that hurts. Can you explain why people are like this and how best to deal with them?

[@TracyHensel]

Hi Karen. Simply put sarcasm should only be used in close relationships where the smack talk is mutual and never hurtful. It sounds like the poking fun you are experiencing is not viewed as fun. Unfortunately, these people are not 'reading' you cues that you are uncomfortable with this joking. The best way to deal with them is express your wishes, distance yourself or eliminate them from your life.

[@karenmiller998]

@@TracyHensel thank you so much for responding! The sarcasm was directed at my husband from my two brothers-in-law. One an attorney who hasn’t worked seriously since he married my sister. The other is on his third wife, my other sister. They’re both highly educated, but love to banter with each other, and unfortunately, other innocent people who don’t appreciate it. Many years ago, the one lawyer brother-in-law loved to tell dumb blonde jokes. My husband told him to stop as we have two beautiful blonde daughters and don’t appreciate the “humor.” My husband dreads visiting my family because of these guys. We’ve been married 42 years and are the longest married couple in the family.

[@judysmith8725]

Love your advise

[@pannaanna8723]

Thank you for this video 🥰 Definitely video about EQ please!!!! Kind regards from London

[@debiluv64]

Thank you for this very helpful video!🙌

[@deinamorgan413]

This is one of those repeat videos for me. Days like today, I need Tracy’s pep talks, thank you so much for this! ❤

[@racheleschmidt]

I’m trying to implement these principles with parents who don’t respect boundaries and come from a authoritative parenting lens even though I’m 30 years old. It’s been a struggle but I know it’s worth it.

[@lprein]

Where do you go to get all this lesson and practice?

[@TracyHensel]

I'm a Certified Professional Coach, so a lot comes from education, as long as my own wealth of knowledge of studying people and their behaviors and tendencies, as well as triggers.

[@RS-ov2st]

So true. Good food for thought. I think sometimes, as people are different, so are peoples intentions. I think intent is I important when forming opinions of others. I think there are those that “are” know it all’s, who can come at you from a judging point of view, or skewed. I think there are also those who truly think they are being helpful by giving advise, or their opinions. They may feel that they are just being friendly and truly mean you no harm. I think some people really are not aware , that it may be something to hold back on in regard to giving advice. Some are really innocent in offering unsolicited advice, while some people are really sizing you up in an inconsiderate judge mental kind of way, eager to get their point across. So, I think intent, or knowing how someone is, if you have that opportunity, is helpful in deciphering interactions and relationships. Sometimes it can be hard to tell, until we get to know someone. It can be a slippery slope sometimes.