Transform Your Relationships: How to Accept and Love Your Parents Through Presence | Eckhart Tolle

In this video, Eckhart Tolle highlights the power of presence in transforming your relationship with your parents. He discusses how embracing the present moment can dissolve past resentments and open the door to genuine love and acceptance. Eckart also explains how to navigate emotional reactions, understand your parents' limitations, and find freedom from past conditioning.
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About Eckhart:
Eckhart Tolle is widely recognized as one of the most inspiring and visionary spiritual teachers in the world today. With his international bestsellers, The Power of Now and A New Earth-translated into more than 50 languages-he has introduced millions to the joy and freedom of living life in the present moment. The New York Times has described him as “the most popular spiritual author in the United States,” and in 2011, Watkins Review (now Watkins Mind Body Spirit) named him “the most spiritually influential person in the world.”
Eckhart’s profound yet simple teachings have helped countless people around the globe experience a state of vibrantly alive inner peace in their daily lives. His teachings focus on the significance and power of Presence, the awakened state of consciousness, which transcends ego and discursive thinking. Eckhart sees this awakening as the essential next step in human evolution.

[@TerriblePerfection]

I was blessed with loving, supportive parents. My heart goes out to anyone who lacked or still lacks that. May you find love anyway. ❤

[@milica4527]

Thank you so much❤❤dont know why but your message touched my heart..so nice how you didint expirience it but have compassion for people who did..thank you🥰

[@TerriblePerfection]

@@milica4527 🤗

[@randomelvis3359]

You are very kind …. Blessings ✨

[@Sandra-fc8pc]

So nice of you to say that! It’s like my biggest dream to have parental love and support and my biggest sadness that I don’t have it. That is my main struggle in life. I have a big problem with all the negative and cruel people in the world, since I had/ I have that as my ”support” system in life. Like no support, just evil. I can’t even understand how they can be like that. Traumatised 3-4 yearolds in adult bodies? Now decaying and soon not here anymore. Is it there gift to me, so I have to seek enlightenment? I think so.

[@milica4527]

@@Sandra-fc8pc You will find peace ,just be patient..you deserve happines..i love you🥰❤️

[@michepriest]

After not talking to my mom for 18 years except for 2 attempts to reconnect, I needed to hear this. Thank you. Thank you 🙏

[@thetemplelaboratory]

Be prepared, just because you've looked inward and have grown doesnt mean she has. I suggest forgiving her in private, well before you reach out to speak with her. Don't fall for the trap in thinking she will finally snap out of it and apologize for her actions and beg for forgiveness.

[@pueraeternum]

I'd like to add to what Eckhart says about acceptance because in our usual way of thinking it might seem like this is an effort that we must give, like an action that we take, but I find that simply observing, allowing the conditions in our mind to be as they are, without any judgments or needing to change them already is the acceptance. So it is more like an attitude, disposition of soul than something that we do.

[@santiago1983ism]

From my experience of 8 years of practicing the power of now, continuously, I know that it is actually not that simple and that easy, definitely. There are emotions deeply rooted within the body, there are terrible pains that have been stored for many years, and just observing is not enough. Sometimes, a therapy that works deeply on emotions, such as bioenergetics (from Lowen), will be necessary. Osho's dynamic meditation is also spectacular for this. I know this from my own experience. If it weren't for bioenergetics and Osho's Dynamics, I would not be able to continue living in this body. It would be impossible. The pain was too much. In fact, it still is. Every day I need to clear my emotions, cry deeply, because the pain left in my heart and chest due to childhood traumas is very great. Especially because I had an extremely complicated mother - I witnessed a lot of violence, a lot of violent fights, a lot of drama, beatings, blood, police... And that's just part of it. So, just observing is not enough. One cannot neglect the need to get emotions out, emotional pain out. Especially those who have a lot of emotional pain.

[@vangestelwijnen]

I have a mother who talks constantly. Repeats a lot of things, tells how bad the world has become, how bad her life is, why oh why... And when she stops, just for a few seconds (like Eckhart tells too), I can see a glimpse of her being without the mind. That helps me through the day.

[@juergenbloh45]

Probably iam your unknown brother..;)

[@SCBlahBLah]

I have a grandma like that, lost in her own fury and her incessant chatter and hatred toward the world pretty much push all of us out of her life at this point. It is a horrible thing to witness and experience as there's nothing we can do but simply watch.

[@recordgirly2567]

Thank you dear sweet Eckhart ❤ It's all an illusion and As long as we live in our minds/egos it's freaking unbearable! Trapped in the illusion of consent thoughts ... But I've found some truths i can try to share. I try to separate myself from thoughts by simply saying, "That's a thoughts .. Look at all those thoughts etc" Not believing every thought. To try to simply be the observer of each thought. I try to meditate 5 min each morning and just focus on my breathing and quickly thoughts will start, so I'll gently bring it back to my breathing. The MOMENT I realize I'm back to thoughts I'm the observer! There's the real "me", the observer, my soul and separate me, the crazy, upset, unhappy ego! But unfortunately The suffering is necessary to motivate us to go through this process. Even though this 5 min is a quick easy way to get out of the unhappy ego/mind and to find some freaking peace in this crazy world, it's still the hardest thing I've ever done! You've got to want it bad and realize the ego is a frighten child that doesn't want to let go ... To let go and let this shift in consciousness happen ... But its exciting that so many are watching this video to ask and learn of a deeper meaning and it's even more exciting because it's happening all over the world! (Eckhart Tolle is A true living spiritual master!)

[@helion333]

Eckhart you’re my best friend, those who are physically close to me are often much further from me so I accept the distance

[@randomelvis3359]

Don’t accept abusers… this makes you an enabler of their behaviour ✨

[@dennishartmann6838]

I struggled a bit with this as well. Having experienced pathological behaviour from family, there is a point where staying available for that person to act out their disfunction plainly becomes harmful to yourself and doesn't help anyone. And Eckhart says this in other talks: It is fine to walk away if you are in danger or the person is "too lost". I consciously went to my family thinking that I can help them make peace with each other. I tried staying with them in presence but things only got worse. I suffered greatly because I thought this was my job to help them. Walking away was the best decision for me after it finally became too much to bear.

[@robinmorgan2713]

The body itself has a wisdom that can also be accepted and honored. Walking away is not a failure, but may be the best of kindness and acceptance . You can still love them but accept that you cannot be in physical or social connection with them.

[@mayfar4961]

Accept your parents words, emptions and feeling as they speak . Then allow your emotions to be and observe you emotions without reacting as you give yourself space by being still. This allow you to transcend . Best spiritual practice .

[@johngreen4683]

Feelings and thoughts ( self talk in the head) of fear, anger, judgement and grudges against others can feel like a friend who is on our side and is supporting us, they encourage and maintain our negative thinking by telling us how justified we are in our dwelling on fearful, angry judgemental thinking and feeling about and towards others , but in reality they are our downfall that prevent our natural state of inner peace and happiness from being a way of life 🙏🙏🙏🙏

[@ChildofGod98765]

Begging for prayers please pray for me and my sons.

[@thegloriousbloodpig9153]

🙏 🙏 🙏

[@oliviacasino8888]

Peace and breath…peace and breath…all will be well

[@freespirit9806]

Parents can be triggers to pull one back into “ person hood””. Toxic parents need to be kept at a long distance.

[@oliviacasino8888]

We are all little lambs finding our way;parent and child. The journey may be long or short but the heart yearns to love and be loved…go forth and keep trying without judgments and shame. Peace to all…

[@paulohlsson27]

Hi Olivia, How's your day going with you?

[@pierrefiliatrault6167]

Complète acceptance......this discribes where I am. Thank you for such a practical solution to a very potentialy complexe situation

[@belindaspechtenhauser6621]

Mr Eckhart Your a beyond a human being Your enrichment is superior and people not only need to listen to you They need to practice and cherish all that you believe in and share I've never known someone to be so spot on I'm not a religious person , but very spiritual and believe in God and our Savior There's a Big difference between the two My gracious thanks for your teachings and wisdom

[@farzinkhandan8502]

Maybe my ego speaking, but one of my biggest dreams is to see this man not from this portal screen, but in person. even my ego loves him 😂

[@rodriguezgomez7515]

Thanks Eckhart 4urwisdem.. thanks to God...☄️⚡💥

[@user-gj2oz3qj6g]

My parents were the best parents they could of been with what they were taught and went through. I guess I’m lucky to have seen the trauma in them and try to release it from myself when it became apparent it was in myself. They were my biggest teachers weather they knew it consciously or unconsciously. Weather it was “good” or “bad”. I found through Eckarts video (there’s one when he talks about a lady who’s deeply unconscious and then becomes conscious in his presence) if I practice or become still before seeing my parents, my mum especially. I can hold my energy whilst in her presence and for that time, she becomes present herself. I could never live with her though (she’s an alcoholic). It would be too much for me to handle on a constant basis. I too hated my parents, angry and disappointed in them. See them make some unconscious choices. The above helped me appreciate them and love them AS THEY ARE!!

[@Rubinakhan-kr3pb]

great job, After divine love we should love our parents

[@Sirius263]

One can also refer to Philip Larkin's poem: "This Be The Verse" 😆 about parents, which has a wry, cynical, alarming clarity and resonates with most people.

[@carolinecaroline6567]

Thank you for your teaching 🙏 ❤️ 😘 😊 ❤❤

[@user-kv3fi5bt5x]

Soothing voice & beautifully explain❤❤..

[@LTUharis93]

So needed this..Thank you.

[@Feensang]

Wir lachten wo andere weinten Freude heilt alle Bitternis dankbar und wahr

[@andretim75]

Oh yes -- german parents can be really difficult 🤣😜😆 Was he actually describing my mother ? It seems Eckhart knows her really well 😂

[@Prophezora]

Same😂

[@jillybean1438]

This is incredibly helpful and important guidance. Thank you for your many years of sharing the Truth of enlightenment. 🙏🏻💖💫

[@bheenachoytooa1604]

Waah, that's superb and well explained.

[@mikeheavyheart5114]

8:00; The Bubble of Perception,...

[@Wako83]

Ancient wisdom reminded by Mr tolle.. Thanks sir

[@vincechopard6481]

Thank you for this nice and wise talk. 🙏🙏

[@abdelmajidnajid2632]

Very good advice

[@yangyan4657]

It 's very useful I think I will practic in many situation,than you Eckhart

[@carolinebirgersgard3754]

Thank you 🙏🏼

[@TheLUCIANA63]

❤ gratitude

[@Redpepper01]

I’ve been asking my guides for assistance with acceptance of my mother and working towards forgiveness . Right on target. Thank you Universe, guides, angels and all! Thank you Eckhart ✨✨💖💖✨✨

[@paulohlsson27]

How's your day going with you?

[@philwyatt2176]

Thanks 🙏

[@EckhartTolle]

Thank you for your support.

[@aishawf]

🔥🔥🔥 Thank you Sir!

[@user-dz3ni8lc4s]

Gracias

[@mollyringwerm9224]

"Only presence can dissolve the past". Imagine if psychotherapists understood this simple but profound principle.

[@TehDawg]

@@paulohlsson27there’s a time and a place mate

[@NancyBeaulieu]

😂😂😂 I’ve come a long way over the years. There is a lot more peace in visits.

[@paulohlsson27]

Hi Nancy, how's your day going with you?

[@paulohlsson27]

Thanks for the thumbs up, how are you spending your spare time?

[@Spiral.Dynamics]

My mom is dying but she doesn’t know it because she has dementia. Her personality is still there, but barely. We are spending her last weeks with her. She is ready to go.

[@johnbowen4442]

Saying Prayers for her very helpful Mother Mary's Rosary ( its universal ) giving the Violet Flame invocation is also very helpful ( Kim Michaels version recommend on youtube ) for her transition blessings .

[@reallythere]

Letting go the past is hard. True. But what about the day after. When there's still no one for you and you are still the family scapegoat to them.

[@mipatataquierido]

agreed. there were time I forgave and accepted and carried on but then more terrible happened when more interrections. Finally I chose no communication, no drama, no conflicts.

[@reallythere]

@mipatataquierido I wish I had maintained no contact but I went back thinking I could... big mistake!

[@meloniestewart2940]

🙏🏼

[@sorrykarkat4865]

❤

[@CB-ke9rs]

Wha is the "field" is it the spiritual plane or rather our spiritual being?

[@josephh1283]

Ekhart!!

[@jenniferc7857]

Gratitude for this🙏 I'm hearing this from a "parenting" prospective. To prevent myself from un-presence babbling at times when expressing "worries" to my son. I really try to see an hear me, As I speak, but sometimes the chatter takes more ahold of the wheel ❤

[@unkolawdio]

I did,,,they refuse to stop punishing me

[@anthonywilliams5070]

How do you be in the present moment when you have a lot of inner child healing?

[@nkastropil]

❤❤❤

[@beremaria9831]

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@selbstsein967]

An die Frau welche das Thema zur Familie gebracht hat: Du möchtest ihnen etwas sagen, was Du Dich nicht getraust aber auch (noch) nicht weisst 🙏

[@jacquesboutelet8643]

Although I listen to Eckhart regularly ,sometimes I think it is easy for him to be relaxed and talk ,he has no children and is filthy rich !

[@rogerlin9602]

7:10 Space comes from acceptance. Space is freedom. Thanks Eckhart. 2 March 2024.💖💖💖🦆🦋🦋🦋🌷🌷🐌🐌🌻🌻🌹🌹

[@mikeheavyheart5114]

10:18; 7:03; 2:00; 0:03;

[@pilargarcia6724]

🙏💛🧡❤️🩷💜🤎💚🩵💙

[@user-rj8py9ld3j]

Jesus glorifies his Father, the one true God (John 17:4, 7-8, 22, 25): Jesus said to the Father, “[4] I have glorified thee on the earth: I have finished the work which *thou gavest me to do.”* [7] Now they have known that all things whatsoever *you have given me come from YOU.* [8] For I have given unto them the words which *YOU gavest me;* and they have received them, and have known surely that *I came out from you,* and they have believed that you did send me.” [22] And the glory which you gave me I have given them; that they may be one, even as WE are one: [25] O righteous Father, the world has not known you: but I have known you, and these have known that you have sent me. [3] And this is life eternal, that they might know YOU-the Father-the only true God, AND Jesus Christ, whom you have sent (John 17:3).

[@chiptowers1]

Let me break this down as I see it. Zen, the aim of Zen is to achieve sudden enlightenment and usually using Koans to transcend rational thought. A Koan is a riddle without a solution which is used in Zen to demonstrate the inadequacy of logical reasoning and provoke enlightenment . And this teacher says Parents are afflicted with their past mental emotional conditioning which he says he calls it a disease as does Zen Teachers. What! So that makes Zen Teachings and Zen Teachers correct and sane and their Parents have a mental illness. What! I mean who really has a mental illness, it would have to be anyone who is talking in riddles and self inflicted just to prove inadequacy of logical reasoning to provoke enlightenment. Can you see the absurdity of Zen and this Teacher. I mean Zen is supposed to achieve enlightenment but that enlightenment comes from the PRESENCE within, same PRESENCE the Parents are being Conditioned by. In this case, one ( parents) is already conditioned and the other is still looking. The point is in Zen mode when enlightenment is achieved ( whatever that would be) what they see or have learned they don't believe its true and call it an illusion.. So Zen is a revolving door of confusion and you can see it in the face of the Teacher and in particular the lady asking the question. And now the Parent has to accept their Childs Zen mode as well and a child without a solution. You got to be joking.

[@randomelvis3359]

Accept and love parents? Children of narcissistic parents feel free to disagree here👇

[@Moniquesprovincial888]

I have horribly narcissistic parents. Since I’ve awakened I’ve gained compassion and forgiveness but I also have boundaries with them. Accepting them frees you, rather then feeling like it’s freeing them. I was horribly abused by both my parents and are low contact with them but stil have compassion for them for it’s not them,it’s the conditioning of their separate self.

[@jayaugustine7938]

So we have to make up imaginary ones 😢

[@thegloriousbloodpig9153]

I believe this can be done from afar if need be. I get it. Right here with you on that but that’s also holding onto your own conditioning to a certain extent. It takes a long time to dissolve completely. No one here is alone on this.

[@adamhope8689]

Boundaries are key!! You can love from afar. Forgiving them is forgiving yourself

[@thegloriousbloodpig9153]

@@jayaugustine7938No not at all. Don’t compare your situation with others. I totally get it tho. It’s weird to say but you alone can be way better parents then them to yourself.

[@analauraaznar1552]

Thank you

[@MonicaEGolak]

[@paulohlsson27]

Hi Monica, How's your day going with you?

[@alfreddifeo9642]

❤‍🩹🙏

[@margaritadipp8595]

❤