Transformers: The Last Knight reviewed by Mark Kermode

[@Scerttle]

"here we go again..."

[@varunspersonal8130]

I laughed right at that.

[@TimeandMonotony]

"I was less angered by it than many of the Transformers films." Put that on a poster, it's probably one of the nicest things any critic has said about this movie.

[@moodyreviews5498]

After analyzing Mark's reviews of the Transformers genre, this is what I have concluded... Transformers = Shock Transformers 2= Anger Transformers 3 = Bargaining Transformers 4 = Depression Transformers 5 = Acceptance

[@Fenix399]

so transformers equals a sickness

[@mshara1]

All the colors turned up to Retina Scorched.

[@fredh1720]

Stages of grief. Apparently the newest one was respectable though? It wasn't a Michael Bay creation I don't think...

[@charliedawson6318]

@@fredh1720 The new Bumblebee film has no connection to the previous films and simply left me thinking, _Of course! Why weren't they doing this all along?_

[@KamradO]

If you bingewatch Mark's reviews of Bay movies, you can clearly see how much life they suck out of him each time. Here he's basically a shell of a man devoid of any emotions.

[@okilfeathermusic]

Was thinking that same thing, the most severe case of Bay fatigue I've seen to date alright.

[@InsaneGamersOfficial]

And there's 14 more coming. Yes. 14. Look it up.

[@SteveSmith-wk9dx]

Is disappointment an emotion? I think disappointment is too strong a word. Resignation? It still feels too strong. Nope, can't find one word to cover it. Abject resignation?

[@browniePOWER01]

InsaneGamers No. This is Bay's last Transformers movie. There are two more planned Transformers movies ('Bumblebee' and untitled 'Transformers 6') however these will not be directed by Bay. What you may be referring to is when Bay stated he had 14 plot ideas for future films, however he did not confirm that these films would be made in any sense.

[@AbrahamEspino1]

InsaneGamers not by Michael Bay

[@robertellis1994]

'He is about as funny as an air filtration system'- Mark Kermode, 2017

[@spacedew]

as the workings of an air filter system* lold

[@spacedew]

This guy gets it. The good name of the air filtration systems must be protected against such brutal attacks.

[@Qwazin]

"... Sir Anthony Hopkins is living with a robot..." That's all I had to hear.

[@muchograndeyolatengo]

Worked pretty well in West World though

[@DJOptimusFunk]

I saw this film for free and I still feel robbed.

[@lynn8735]

Optimus Funk time is money, so I'd say you still paid for watching and your feeling is justified

[@ColeEdits]

Optimus Funk Robbed of 2 hours of your life.

[@LegoTim82]

Optimus Funk me too

[@mattwales2734]

Having Mark Walberg and Anthony Hopkins in the same scene together is a crime against humanity.

[@Lark1610]

Matt Wales He worked with great casts and did well (Boogie Nights: Burt Reynolds, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Julianne Moore, Don Cheadle, William H. Macy, John C. Riley, Luis Guzmán, Alfred Molina or Departed: Leonardo di Caprio, Matt Damon, Vera Farmiga, Jack Nicholson, Martin Sheen, Alec Baldwin, Ray Winston; in Boogie Nights he had scenes with almost every member of the cast since he played the main role, in Departed he was in most scenes paired with Sheen, and had dialogues with di Caprio or Baldwin for example). The crime here is to watch Hopkins directed by Bay in 5th installment of a franchise about gigantic cosmic robots morphing into cars.

[@reecejennings9637]

We live in a world where both Wahlberg and Hopkins have been nominated for acting Oscars...

[@avanishdutta2658]

@@reecejennings9637 He does deserve credit for his best performances in The Departed and Boogie Nights. He was much better there than in transformers.

[@tomtalks23]

Never clicked a Kermode review so fast.

[@613and802]

Same.

[@margaret928]

HA, same

[@natenbox64]

Same

[@Shokarneda]

Thomas Broome-Jones Kermode is the only reason why I want Michael Bay to keep making Transformer films.

[@MGSBigBoss77]

Yo, had to hear him destroy another bayfest yet again!

[@TheSt1092]

The review we've all been waiting for from Michael Bay's no 1 fan.

[@Ryhan_Beard]

I'm surprised Mark never brought up the part during the film which implied that the Transformers helped out with the Underground Railroad and were friends with Frederick Douglass.

[@natenbox64]

"SIR, Anthony Hopkins.."

[@joynerkt]

Natenbox64 😂😂😂😂

[@pamelairving3817]

😆😂😂🙏

[@innersmiff]

Five films in, we've managed to get to one that merely makes us sleepy and tired. Progress!

[@foxybingo1112]

Lee McQueen The first one was terrible, but with a few redeeming qualities. The others are laughably bad.

[@Aqquila89]

It's disappointing. If it was outstandingly terrible, at least we would've got a good Kermode rant out of it. But it's just run-of-the mill terrible, and only makes him tired.

[@MGSBigBoss77]

The first movie, everybody had to go and see how Transformers were finally adapted for the big screen in live-action, so there's no shame in saying you had to go and check it out. The sequels on the other hand, have been utterly awful and they've all been a difficult nightmare to get through!

[@ps5stuffguy]

James Smith First one was fantastic. 2nd one awful. I enjoyed 3rd and 4th. 5th was pretty bad generally.

[@hudsonsirheshicks2653]

My condolences to all film reviewers have absolutely have to sit through it to spread the ill cheer. Dayum, that's two and a half hours you'll never get back.

[@MisterIm313]

Grabs soft roll... this gonna be good.

[@nickmattio3397]

Grab a brewski while ur at it too lol

[@EnzoTheBaker]

Soft roll? Here, that means toilet paper (the brand) But then, that might be relevant too when talking Transformers.

[@MisterIm313]

EnzoTheBaker haha. That works too.

[@RuhBuhJuh1]

"It is by no means the worst of the previous Transformers films" one for the poster

[@scotty_blocks]

An air filter system is actually funnier.

[@Tennislover511]

I will never get tired of mark’s transformers rants

[@NoWhereMan95]

Sad to see Hopkins in this, after his fantastic performance in Westworld.

[@krombopulos_michael]

To be honest, Anthony Hopkins has been in plenty of trash, despite being a great actor. At least he got paid well for this trash.

[@NoWhereMan95]

+GilRayne Fair point, thought it is Sir Anthony Hopkins we're talking about. I doubt he needs the money or the added recognition. I don't know maybe it is a nice change of pace after a gruelling TV job. He is an old man after all.

[@NoWhereMan95]

+Krombopulos Michael True, true. There's no denying the amount of garbage he's been in.

[@benw8263]

He was good in Westworld, pity Westworld wasn't what it was hyped up to be!

[@FantaLiteBrav]

Ben Grizzly Westworld was excellent

[@holmbjerg]

I have been waiting for this.

[@Swatyo]

Michael Bay : "My powers have doubled since we last met, Mark"

[@Elyk91388]

Kermode: "Good. Twice the budget, double the fall."

[@natenbox64]

Me too

[@holmbjerg]

I expected a little more fireworks.

[@ryankearney9685]

The fact that Mark rocks in with a suit, on a radio show, to give a film review means he clearly is the original G of the Film critic world. Mans a don

[@huzhuiwei]

"Just sounds like an Einstürzende Neubauten concert with the volume turned up" ha ha ha ha ha

[@misomiso8228]

"Less Angered" - That's High Praise Mark!

[@johnredfern448]

You know when it's a Bay review that's over 10 mins it's going to be a good one. Feet up, adjust headphones, hit play. I think i'm going to enjoy this.

[@pujaproductions]

"That soundtrack that sounds like Einstürzende Neubauten meets Aerosmith"

[@poorlypaidpoet3206]

Throw the dog a bone, take the phone off the hook, get the popcorn.....Mark is about to review a Transformers movie. Lovely!

[@Melvinwacko]

Hope Bay keeps making these as long as you keep reviewing them Mark.

[@MrPboys1]

a einsturzende neubauten gig turned up to eleven would make very happy.....

[@lionofjudah6753]

"I said "so." Please throw a book at me."*crumples up paper and throws it*"Thank you.""That wasn't a book, it was an email from a listener.""Fine." Love it!

[@BradleyAdams]

I went in with high expectations, and left disappointed. I am, incidentally, referring to the review rather than the film, which I have exactly zero intention of seeing. I was hoping for a review of the explosive rant variety, but instead was treated to one of the fleetingly frustrated but mostly tired variety. The latter is plenty of fun, but less fun than the previous four.

[@ElVindicto]

"I was less angered by it than many of the Transformers movies..." Noooooo Mark, don't you know that's why we're here? Give the people what they want.

[@donovansan]

Transformers AND Pirates in one year? Excellent time to watch Kermode

[@TheDenohora]

Fantastic. My favourite part was when you listed as a 'positive' that there was less of it to endure than the other movies

[@vincevirtua]

Anyway, go see Baby Driver instead.

[@alexmeyer5260]

I have no intention of seeing this movie now or ever.

[@shortsightedfarseer4350]

Listened to this on the day and laughed all the way through, probably even funnier watching it again. Just love the fact he makes no attempt to hide his contempt for Bay as a filmmaker. The fact that "it made me less angry" is the most positive thing he says about the film says it all.

[@tinmachine693]

Einsterdennuebarten(incorrect spelling)!!!! I saw them live once. It was a terrifying experience. I left before the end.

[@breengreg]

This review is the movie critic version of "I'm not angry, I'm disappointed...."

[@Dninny1]

Mr. Kermode, thank you as always. Worth the wait. Same time in a couple of years.

[@michaelcoull8590]

I know it's out of context but I have no idea what's going on in that clip

[@theofficialvernetheturtley338]

Thanks for explaining the plot Mr. Kermode. The film never did.

[@Prolix8]

Can someone please send me a transcript of the plot? I have no idea what this was all about...

[@connie_d]

Watching this now. I have no idea why. Does anyone know why the aspect ratio keeps randomly changing? That's more interesting than the actual film.

[@TomCamies]

I think there is three or four different aspect ratios. It's completely bizarre, at one point Wahlberg is thrown against a wall by a transformer and in two seconds of film it changes about four times. Just what were they thinking? No rhyme or reason for it. But to answer your question Christopher Nolan has popularised variable aspect ratio films with Dark Knight, Dunkirk and others. Bay is copying this trend but in the most incompetent way with none of Nolan's skill in visual filmmaking.

[@GoldenGyroBalls]

THE TIME IS FINALLY HERE!

[@stevechandler3598]

Not sure if he liked it or not.

[@TBullsGhost]

"The colours are turned up to retina scorch".

[@iv0rysh0es39]

Thanks for actually using his Sir title.

[@llcooljaz1097]

"...all things come to those who wait, and I have waited so very long for this moment..." (skeletor) thank you lord for this transformers review by the good doc

[@ViperChief117]

Sat through this movie so disappointed. I laughed at dialogue moments that shouldn't be laughed at cause they were so bad. I had to watch Logan afterwards to try and wash away the disappointment.

[@bobvanilla7903]

Been waiting for this one since the film was announced!

[@stevethomas74]

If you look up the definition of 'damning with faint praise', you will find Lord Kermode's review of this movie right next to it

[@awsom50]

Love listening to Mark's reviews of the Transformers movies... and that's even though I actually really enjoyed The Last Knight... Hopkins' enthusiasm shines through and I just had a blast watching it.

[@1080TJ]

S I R

[@rockinchimp]

Thankfully this series is looking like it is turning into less of the money machine it once was, this opened in the US with a series low for the weekend by a substantial margin.

[@adamcarroll2033]

I have to ask... as god awful as Michael Bay is would you agree that the Rock is a pretty phenomenal action movie. I really like the theory that Connery is playing an aged James Bond in that role

[@jackhammer40k_]

Not in any way to defend Michael Bay-splosion, but isn't it the responsibility of the BBFC to make sure that this is correctly rated; if the language is "15" then rate the film "15", no?

[@Derek_Smallshorts]

New poster quote: "By no means the worst." -Mark Kermode

[@rajakarim4381]

and people think he's not open minded. he's kinder than me

[@chriswilson3126]

Liked it before finishing the vid, you guys are the best!

[@Hortster]

where can I turn my tv colors up to 'retina scorch'? ;)

[@nickshale6926]

Oooh - Have I been waiting for this! ...have at them Mr Kermode. You magnificent ranting beast you!

[@peterhaskey8018]

nick shale i

[@MasticinaAkicta]

Ah Micheal Bay Transformers movies, actually most if not all Micheal Bay movies. It is like expecting a train crash and getting one with extra explosives and sexy babes, just because. Gotta say though ending up on a level where the story doesn't even matter and characters just exist, that is even for him quite an achievement.

[@alexsowden8394]

Mark Kermode's 10 min review of this film is far more engaging and entertaining than the film itself could ever be.

[@roxyqueen2]

Hey, that's Alnwick Castle in Northumberland! Also known as Hogwarts in the first Harry Potter.

[@foxybingo1112]

Wow. Transformers the radio play. There's something I need to see.

[@nealmceneaney3771]

Not fair to suggest MacDormand, Tuttturo need to immediately make an arthouse film after making transformers but saw Hopkins is a genius for just taking the money 💰

[@LaMortesAbyss]

The world of the Transformers is about factions - with their own models for governance - that arose from a corrupt society at a time when said world's resources were on a sharp decline. It's a story - if told properly, that really belongs in the world as we know it today. But time and time again, the owners of the franchise let this overgrown child with a gun powder fetish. It's baffling. They'd make just as much money with deeper storytelling.

[@MisterKauffman]

>Kermode reviews Bay >over ten minutes long Oh, this shit's going to be juicy.

[@saffmichael4369]

Even for someone as simple-minded as Michael Bay, every filmmaker has a motive for putting a line, an exchange, in a movie. ......so, WHAT was the whole point of the Romeo and Juliet law exchange he included in this garbage dumb? Bay chose to make their relationship fall under this statute; Bay chose to make them discuss this......WHY? Does it establish something about the boyfriend that is key to who is character is, something about his journey? OR, is the Bay's "subtle" way of trying to work a discussion of "well, not all men who are accused of being perverts actually are predators and perverts" Who really thinks that dialogue has ANYTHING to do with developing the story?

[@BozQ]

Wow. Dr Kermode's review is rather tepid. I'm quite surprised.

[@potterpotty01]

mark kermode should meet dan murrell from screen junkies for an epic micheal bay rant off!

[@omgsolikevalleygirl]

loving the sound design though

[@svenof9]

I'd love to see Mark Kermode review The Transformers: The Movie (1986) ;)

[@DarthContinent]

"Wanna go see a dead robot?"Channeling "Stand By Me".

[@radicaladz]

Ka-ching! "Ah, my old regiment - the Third Mounted Cash Registers."

[@whiteydiamond]

My favorite part is when the movie stops and looks at the audience to tell us Marky Mark's daughter has a boyfriend with a licence to date underage girls. How did Bay survive cancel culture???

[@CursedWheelieBin]

I'm in the pub. Haven't watched this video yet but I love it already. Like like like

[@whateverangeltaken]

I haven't seen the movie, but I have seen the house it built

[@horatiohuskisson5471]

Age of Extinction/Age of Ultron and now The Last Knight/The Last Jedi

[@mandalorion]

I've been looking forward to this.

[@Batman89057]

Why does everyone complain about the noise in these films? Like its only average noise for an action film, no need to exaggerate it

[@darrenowen76]

I didnt bathe in clorox after this....i drank it

[@H.Ash9]

Been looking forward to this

[@hassanchaudhry4153]

the movie isn't so bad but making optimus against humanity for 5 mins was pointless well at least bumblebee has his voice back thanks to nemesis prime just before optimus goes back to his normal self , the main thing is that michael bay is retiring and tf6 will be about bumblebee most of the time

[@shadowdramon01]

I think it's less Michael Bay listening to his critics and more that we finally got a Transformers movie not written by Ehrin Krueger. It's still horrible, true, but slightly better writing than the last three. Slightly.

[@maolsheachlannoceallaigh4882]

I've only seen a few Kermode reviews. Are they all this PC?

[@JD1010101110]

Doesn't Michael Bay make his sets incredibly fun to work on, that's why actors love working with him?

[@FatSnorlax]

Here we go!!!

[@Yablon925]

It's here!

[@robert.mercer294]

Don’t like the slight against ende neu, must say.

[@tonevogel]

I made a mistake and saw this and fell asleep it is so boring boring boring I woke up and it was still going then fell asleep again woke up and the cinema bloke was telling me to go so bad so so bad

[@FantaLiteBrav]

Lol Michael Bay doesn't determine the BBFC rating mate. He creates the movie and then it is submitted to bodies who certify the rating in that particular area. If the studio are given feedback they may edit it to achieve a lower rating. I'm surprised you don't know this.

[@ethidian3444]

Just the plot synopsis of Transformers makes me wheezy.

[@pastrychef1985]

RLM did a better review.

[@Aricloud]

So a bottom up shirt and a long skirt is a stripper dress? I’m confused 🤷🏽‍♂️

[@8ulls3y3]

Well played sir, as always.

[@Inhuman0]

You want to know the only reason why I hope Transformers movies will keep being made ? So I can listen to Kermode trashing them so eloquently.

[@bengejuknowit3048]

I know Mr Kermode doesn't like the transformers films but as a fan, I can say this is by far the worst one! I know none of them are perfect but this one stood out for being boring, silly historical plots & for anyone who grew up with characters like Hotrod & Unicron, a massive slap in the face!

[@RichardBatchelorComposer]

The time is here, do we all have enough popcorn? I've waited for this impending massacre all year.

[@movieman82us]

Cutting language because of a rating? What a silly criticism to have of the movie. How about instead, give the movie the rating it deserves. It's not on the filmmaker to censor them self. It's up to the ratings board to give it a proper rating. You are attacking the wrong person. Yes, I know, you hate Michael Bay. But this is not a valid criticism IMO.