Tseev Yog Kwv Tij Yeej Sib Khib. 2/23/2023

[@nengher7518]

Yeej yog kawg lawm, sawv daws ib pab kwv tij yog tus txiv twg nkaum poj niam qab tiab es yuav kom tas nrho cov kwv tij nrog nws nkaum nws poj niam qab tiab ces yeej tsis muaj kev sib haum nawb. Hais rau sawv daws ua kev kawm, yog koj ua tsis taus txiv es koj cia koj poj niam hnav ris, koj hnav tiab ces koj hnav koj ib leeg kheej, koj txhob zuag koj pab kwv tij los nrog koj nkaum koj poj niam qab tiab es sawv daws thiaj muaj kev sib haum xeeb nawb.

[@ouradventuresnspecialmoments]

Word of Advice: If you're planning to get married, please make sure you are financially ready! The last thing you wanna be is a burden to your family, especially on your special day!

[@sailee8510]

Work hard, save money, pay for your own wedding/dowry! Same with your own funeral! Stop depending on your parents, siblings, in-laws, children, family to take care of these for you. As crazy as it sounds, I'm 31 years old, but already have my life insurance policy, selected burial plot, and casket chosen. I already have a will made out on how much to spend for my funeral and how I want it. Hmong people in general need to change their mindset. We will not live forever.

[@heysoniher]

Great job on getting all of that together. It will definitely make things easier for your children, if you have any, and everyone.

[@maiherher626]

You are so smart. Why can’t our Hmong people change their mindset like you.

[@MSMAIYANG]

I agree. You shouldn't be getting married if you are not financially ready or depend on others to pay the dowry. If anything, he should've worked to save first and the gf needs to help pitch in too because she is going to be his life partner. A lot of Hmong OG/parents failed their children when it comes to setting up their children's financial securities. I understand everyone is struggling but parents need to teach their young adult children how to be financially independent, find a job, start saving, have an emergency fund.

[@ashton8878]

Well, I’m broke so, I’ll just be cremated.

[@sunlee6984]

Well done but the OGs will change that regardless if they want to. It’s in their hands to do it so they will not listen to your wishes

[@KueVue]

Sorry you're going through that but I will say this in general. Save up for your own wedding/dowry. If you couldn't, you're not ready for marriage. You don't need to depend on people and they're not obligated to help you. You're better off with no burdens and family issues.

[@nkaujcuathoj4626]

ໃັ

[@nkaujntse5196]

Agree. This story is misleading. Everyone should tell the groom up front that it was a loan not help out as in kind donations because we are brothers.

[@houayang2014]

Tos koj niam tij thiab tij laug lawv ua li los koj kuj xav rau koj tus kheej xwb thaum hais txog nyiaj lawm koj twb tsis kam ib yam thiab ne , yog peb muab nyiaj saib hlob kev kwv kev tij , kev nism txiv , me tub me nyuam yuav sib tawg tag zoo li no

[@Loves_GodSR]

Lesson... save money for your own wedding, your kids wedding, and your own funeral. Saves you from owning anyone and upsetting anyone.

[@No1uknow68]

And don’t be afraid to plan your own funeral ahead of time. Hmong folks that’s bad luck…it’s not, it’s smart. Save your kids and families from quarreling.

[@debbieyaj4642]

Neb twb tau nyiaj phij cuam ntau ntau ces muab them tej nqi tshoob uas koj tij laug lawv pab rau neb kom tas ces thiaj muaj kev sib haum xeeb. Koj los koj yeej tsis xav kam neb cov nyiaj ntxiv rovbrau lawv es nej thiaj muaj kev tusiab lawm ne.

[@nkaujmoobleeg]

@debbieyaj4642~free money, that's why. He could have paid his older brothers back, but he assumed it was free money. It's too easy. So sad. They were all wrong.

[@hlubkojforever1901]

what you did is wrong too for not doing your father funeral. You allowed your wife to turn you right to left. You need to man up. Just because nobody pays for your wedding that you seek revenge on all your siblings. You need to be mature and pays for your own wedding as this is america not laos. Why do people always expect someone to pay for their wedding like your siblings owe you. You live with your wife family and disown your own family, you’re not making logic sense to me.

[@luvinniceboxers]

Realistically, no one should get married unless one can afford it.

[@colleenchan9872]

Koj tsis khiav koj cov kwvtij ib plab yug los koj yuav tau khiav koj cov kwvtij koom dab qhuas nawb neej tsa yeej zoo kawg tabsis thaum koj mob koj yuav tuag lawv yuav muab koj pov rau koj cov kwvtij xwb ov es nco ntsoov li ntawv! Twb tsis tsim nyig neb chim rau neb cov kwvtij hauv tsev vim nothing is free yog yus tsis muaj 💰💰ces txhob yuav pojniam xwb!! Nej yeej siab kub tsis paub sib hais thiab tus phem los muab phem tshaj qhov phem os! Cov neeg khib mas yeej muab kab mob khib nawb nws ntxhub koj ces tus kab mob khib yeej muab nws noj ib tog zuj zus li os ..

[@MyConfessions]

At the beginning of all these problems.... I mean your brother's wife is not wrong, though they could have waited until you are financially stable to ask for money back. But they're not wrong. If you have dowry money, why not pay it back, better than knowing that you still owe people money. We have to change this mindset that the parents and siblings have to take care of everything. If you want to marry, please wait and be financially stable to get 10 grand for your wife. No one wants to ask money back, but as a grown man, you should already know. You dont get anything for free.

[@lnchannel1186]

I 100% agree. If the shoe was on the other foot, if your wife and you paid for your brothers wife, your wife would want the money back as well. They are struggling just as you feel you are struggling. It sounds like you are selfish and only want things your way. Yet when they don’t show up to your events you feel they don’t love you, yet when you don’t show up for their events, you have your reasons. I would say the majority of the fault is yours.

[@tradingkite3571]

To add, we also need to change the mindset that if parents don't want to fulfill their obligations as a parent, don't expect your children to take care of you or your funeral when you die.

[@lnchannel1186]

@@tradingkite3571 things are changing now. Our generation will no longer expect our children to take care of our funeral.

[@heysoniher]

@@tradingkite3571 Agreed! It's so weird how Hmong people think about family. It's a "I scratch your back and you scratch my back" kind of deal.

[@ShouaTojsiab]

In this day and age, that is the case. Not too long ago it was the expectation that the least parents can do pay for their son’s bride. It would be this guy’s fault if his parents didn’t pay for all his brothers’ wedding. The issue here is the niam tij’s jealousy of his wife.

[@meesuranatkosan977]

zaj neej neeg no txiv neej tsis yog txiv neej poj niam yog txiv neej xwb.

[@panenglor8294]

To the guy in this story, paid for your own wedding, why do you expect your siblings to take care of that for you when you know you can't do the same in return smh. You and your wife has education and has money but refuse to help too, your whole family greedy sib phim. Don't call him my tij laug

[@V.I.P2418]

Yes I think this dude is really ungrateful

[@heysoniher]

You need to remember that nothing is free in this world. You knew you didn't have money, but still got married anyway and expected your dad/brothers to cover the cost for you. You are wrong on that and Hmong people need to stop this practice. Work for what you want and stop depending on others because it's not their responsibilities to take care of you. What your niam thij did was wrong and just plain petty and I'm surprised you guys took this long to break free from her. If she pulls those Hmong cev cai on me, I would just laugh in her face and move on. You live in the USA not in LAOS, those rules don't apply here.

[@thestoryofmylife6979]

Listening to this story, it’s seems like I need to hear both side of the story to judge.

[@seeyang5951]

True. Sounds like he just defending himself and how smart his wife is.

[@maimoua1371]

LOL agreed his wife no either perfect

[@maiherher626]

I’m sorry to say but all of you are in the wrong. First of all it should never be your parents responsibility to pay for your marriage. That’s is your own responsibility. You Mary your wife for you not your parents. Second of all your parents are your responsibility no matter what. They gave you life and loved you. Using your parents not paying for your wedding as an excuse to not bury your parents make you the bad ones. I don’t understand why’s boys always think their parents owe them that.

[@ThePrincessWorrior]

Because they are boys. Men probably won’t. Boys say “it’s not fair!.” Like this dude, he never became men and stays boy, who couldn’t buy his own mama, but want one and expected mommy and daddy to pay.

[@maryly09]

💯💯💯 people are too entitled now a days.

[@maimyceo]

SAY THIS LOUDER!! 100%!!!!!

[@bosslady8498]

Agreed!! Well said 💯‼️👏🏼

[@wendylee4892]

From my understanding, Hmong parents help the sons with the bride costs. So when the parents go, the married sons will give them a cow for their funeral. But of course, I don’t think the parents are obligated to pay 100% for the bride. Especially if you’re able to help pitch in too. It’s your parents so you should help pay for funeral costs, especially the sons. In a way, it’s an owe me, owe you system. I’m young and know this so all the OGs are all aware. 🤷🏻‍♀️ It’s the Hmong OG system.

[@hlixyooj8179]

Everyone should prepare for themselves, including both wedding and funeral expenses. Not fair to push these personal expenses on others, causing them hardship.

[@cheehawj15]

The lesson in the last 10 mins are 100% true. I grew up poor, but once I was able to save a little and started traveling the world, my friends envied me, but my own family (sisters and brothers) hated me. I could never understand why but now I see they hated that I enjoyed life differently now.

[@hlubyang4072]

Nej cov tij laug thiab niam tij es ua li cas yuav txawv ua luaj li....peb tsa tej kwv yim tas ces tas lawm xwb peb tsis tsib rov qab li nawb....

[@meeyang8411]

Thaum tsis muaj niam txiv twb tsa tsis tau tub nqe nyab. Qhov no qhia tias ib leej niam tseem ceeb npaum li cas. Hwm nej niam mog.

[@tsachijdawb3536]

Hais tau yog tshaj plaws li os kwv tij kuv lub neej ces zoo kiag li koj lub thiab os

[@maylovang1880]

Neb ib niam txiv no los siab me thiab siab phem kawg thiab yus yuav poj niam yus them yus los yeej tsis ua cas li os, pheej yuav tos lwm tus yuav poj niam rau yus no,

[@b3cali83]

it's so sad to hear that this has become so normal in the hmong community 😔 a parent funeral expense shouldn't be an excuse to cut off ties. Hmong ppl need to stop doing an extravagant funerals and go back being humble. Shouldn't matter if your parents pay for your wife or not, you should pinch in money for your own parents' funeral. you owe your parents for giving you life and that should be enough reason.

[@lnchannel1186]

100%agree

[@pavang5531]

Agreed 💯

[@heysoniher]

Agreed! Hmong people living backwards. A time of grief is not the time to show off how great or expensive you can do a funeral.

[@touyang5608]

Yup, Hmong meska is crazy and spend money to entertain people. I’m going to cut all of those says tradition…when I go. No need to do all of those shits to please anyone

[@V.I.P2418]

@@pavang5531 yup, so true!

[@baoyang6462]

Ua cas u khib luag es u tau dab tsi los naw luag muaj dua u los yog luaj hmoo xwb tsis txhob mus khib luag u khib luag ces kav tsij rau2 siab khwv xwb yog u khwv2 kawg lawm los tsis muaj li luag ces yog u txoj hmoo yeej tsua los li ntawv xwb kav tsij nrog lawv siab xwb u yim khib lawv ces u yim txom nyem xwb thiab tsis txhob mus muab luag tej kwv tij hloov hlwb kom lawv sib ntxub u los yeej yug tau 1 pab thiab yog u mus ua li ntawv rau lawv sib ntxub ua ntej ces lwm hnub u cov yuav ua raws nraim thiab u yug tau u yeej xav kom lawv sib hlub thiab txhob khwv ua phem rau luag thiaj ua neej kaj siab os .

[@laceyoneoone]

You guys forget your father did what he knew best and raised all of you brothers through hard times and into adulthood. How embarrassing that you and your wife use her “4 year degree” as an excuse. Her degree helped you advance in life but it obviously did not advance your intelligence about life. She’s just as selfish as everyone else, influencing your actions towards your family. You, your brothers, your wife, and your niam tijs, you guys are no better than the other. Learn to love. No amount of diploma and degrees is going to teach you that.

[@tsisyoojyim3875]

Neb 2leeg cia neb 2tug pojniam coj neb ib yam nej cov kwvtij thiaj sib tawg. Peb yeej yuav pojniam lus ibyam thiab, tabsis yuav qhov yuav tau xwb.

[@seeyang5951]

I don't understand why people expect parents to pay for their bride dowery and if they don't than these kind of issues arise. From this guy side of the story, if your wife is smarter, college degree and you received alot gift money back, what's wrong with just returning your brothers money back to them. I don't get it. Something so little but make it so big for your own greed.

[@V.I.P2418]

Totally agree! I don’t feel bad for him at all

[@nkaujntse5196]

They were all too greedy. Expected the less unfortunate to pay for their wedding. Money can be earned but not family. All the sister in laws including this guys wife are siab mes2.

[@maipaj3117]

Koj yog ib tug txiv tsev ruam tiag2...muab yus cov kwv tij txiav tag tseem qhuas tias koj yog tus ntse...wb twb muaj niam muaj txiv, kuv tseem los pab kuv tus txiv khwv them wb li nqi tshoob na..wb tseem txawj hlub cov laus tshaj thiab yeej tsi xam khib ib qho txog tej kwv tej tij li os....

[@shawnlee420]

You have to know that you can not control others but you can control yourself. If you are secure enough than no one can destroy you.

[@maiherher626]

Totally agreed

[@mlee6092]

Bro, sounds like you're talking about my life 😆 🤣 😂. Yes, the most jealous people are those closest to you. Your niam tij is as toxic and sick as mine two. I feel ya. Just cut them off and live your fab life. These people waste their time and energy trying to tear you down. Thats not a bad thing for you. That way you cam keep moving up while their energy is never devoted to themselves so they'll never catch up with you. So, it's a good thing. Keep making them jealous. Keep moving, keep achieving and let them stew in their own toxic jealousy. Who cares?

[@blasukhang7995]

Tsi Yog li Koj hais nawb me Phooj Ywg Kwv Tij npaum li cas los Lawv hlub tsi tau Koj nawb mog, Tus uas hlub Koj ces Yog koj tus Txijnkawm xwb.

[@meandeverythingelse2056]

I don't know why. Some people expect others to pay their wife for them.. it's your wife your wedding PAY FOR IT YOURESLR. go get a loan go around BORROW others. What you feel wrong that your older siblings didn't pay your wife for you? And your wife is mad that you two have to pay.. GROW UP.. FREE LOADER ARE ALWAYS HAVE OTHERS TO BLAME.

[@naothao1788]

tej laus hais tias yug tau ib pab los yeej twb tsis muaj ib tug yuav ua tau txiv ces yog zoo li pab txiv tub no tiag.

[@ILJA-c2q]

Money is the root of all evil. Be prepared, have your own money, and don’t depend on others.

[@leelaiyah789]

If you're gonna be mad be mad at yourself be mad at your dad. You are not her son it's not her job.

[@OppoOppo-eh4iz]

Zaj dab neeg no zoo kiag li kuv pab kwv tij tam sim no ntag os

[@dr3ambab3e]

Both sides phem ib yam xwb os. If you don't help nobody don't expect them to help you, koj tu siab tsis tau vim koj tsis pab thiab nes.

[@chervang6550]

Nej ces phem ib yam xwb os!

[@ThePrincessWorrior]

Yom? Tib co thaub kaus thiab pog ntim xwb

[@malyvu3333]

Don't be upset at your siblings and their spouses. If you want to be upset, be upset at your parent(s). It is not your siblings job to pay for your wife dowry. you should pay it back. It is not like your siblings are rich or well off. Even you admit that you're better off than your siblings. So just back then back. 🙄 your wife doesn't sound so great either.

[@saykaomee]

If you can't even pay for your own wedding then why are you getting married? There are so many highly educated women and their in laws don't hate them so there's wrong with your wife.

[@nkaujntse5196]

He is too blind to see his wife’s doing.

[@myyearmouanoutoua6908]

Yeah kwv tij tsis sib haum.ce yog peb cov poj niam..ua los sab raum los..tsis txawj sib coj xwb

[@EmTsu24]

Koj chim tsis tau tau koj cov tij laug. Koj tus kheej yuav tsum paub npaj nyiaj ua ntej koj yuav mus yuav poj niam. Koj tus poj Niam hais tsis yog lawm, nws txwv tsis tau kom koj txhob kiav koj cov tij laug. Koj txiv los kuj ua tsis yog lawm thiab vim nws yog txiv nws yuav tau pab li nws pab tau. Poj niam yog yuav rau koj tsis yig yuav rau koj cov tij laug thiab koj expect tsis tau kom koj cov tij laug txhob expect koj them rov qab.

[@xc208]

Nej pheej hi hi tej cov hleb peb this hnov Rhiab Rhian pob ntseg li peb this xav hnov thov txim Tham ntau ntau

[@svang2148]

Wow.. tus niam tij no has some jealousy issues. Her grudge is deep

[@jinlyyang423]

Yog Xav yuav poj niam mas yus yuav tsuv khwv nyiaj yus yuav yus mam me kws ua cas twb nyob tej chaw Vam meem thiab nyob tej chaw khwv nyiaj yoojyim cas yu Tsis khwv yus es yus mam mus yuav poj niam rau yus es tseem tso niamtxiv tu Tsis txawm ntses yuav poj niam rau yus. You not good a brother

[@hova6421]

Kwv tij ceg yog sib2 khib nyiajj li no yeej TSS sib haum og yog neb txawj xav ceg neb ob niam txiv tsa tug kwv yau log yeej tau lawm nawb yog ob tug niam tij phem xb kj tss phem ceg kj yeej ua tau lawm nawb

[@leek-te5dx]

It is true there are outside Nyab that come into the family and ruin all family relationships so long as it is not hers.

[@heysoniher]

If you don’t want an outsider to ruin family relationships then be responsible for yourself and don’t depend on them. In this case, it’s niam tij’s money as well so she has a say in it. You’re not entitled to anything just because you’re family.

[@leek-te5dx]

@@heysoniher I know what you mean but there are Nyabs that wreak havoc on their husbands' side of the family burning everyone and creating so much drama for the sake of a few grand. Those type you stay far away. This brother did not read his sister in law correctly he should have paid back no matter how broke quietly because Niam Tij make sure she don't lose a dime. in that case you heard enough of those orphan stories.

[@heysoniher]

@@leek-te5dx Yes, unfortunately there are those crazy people you have to stay away from.

[@fulovelyly9161]

Mloog koj piav xwb mas zoo li koj tus txiv niam tij nyiam kj ua ntej koj yuav koj tus poj niam lawm nawj… nws hlub koj lawm nws thiaj li coj li ntawd rau neb

[@mouavang3371]

Brother I feel your pain. It doesn't matter brother or sister, never borrow money from them. I have similar experienced. The bank is your best family. It's easier to make monthly payments then a lump sum payment back to your siblings.

[@maryannthao6029]

Tus niam tij ko seb me dhau lawm peb muaj niam tshiab xwb niam tshiab yeej tsis them peb tan sis peb cov kwv niam tshiab yug ces peb pab ib leeg 2 txhiab peb tsis hais them li peb cov nus yuav peb ib leeg ib txhiab😂 peb tsis need them li as peb tej tij laug me nyuam poob Tom qab peb ib leeg ib txhiab yuav pib nyob hoom tos tuaj peb tsis need the li

[@ylauj3523]

This type of stuff happen in every hmong family with family members like that who need enemy 😢 sad too shy

[@muajmoo9621]

Yus ua zoo ces yus tau qhov zoo xwb yeej yog tim koj thiab

[@LymeeCha]

Honestly, she's in love with you that's why it bothered her so much when you got married and why she did that when your brother died.

[@ThePrincessWorrior]

Some percent possible. He must be niam tij’s txiv yau before. So sense he got married and didn’t stay her txiv yau, she got mad. She hoped to be his niam yau, when tij laug died, but still can’t get him.

[@yerlor8328]

Teb chaws meskas hauj lwm ntau li ntau ua hauj lwm tseg kom Tau nyiaj yus mam li yuav poj niam thiaj tsis muaj neeg tsib tsib nqi ntawm yus tsis txhob tias yuav tos niam tos txiv them nqi rau yus

[@ภานุกรอัศวรุ่งเรืองกุล]

ใช่เลยครับผมยังเจอครับ💯

[@ntujdubntujkaj339]

Koj thiab koj cov kwvtij nej ces zoo ib yam xwb os lov koj los yeej zoo phim lawv thiab os lov txhob xav tias koj yog tus zoo no os yeej zoo ib yam nkaus xwb nej pab kwvtij kos na

[@nengyang6746]

Pem ib yam

[@amponpaplern4695]

เรื่องไม่ว่ากันนะ..แต่เรื่องพ่อของคุณคุณทำไม่ถูกต้องแล้วจ้า

[@kaimarro517]

Dude there are banks for a reason. Why do grown adults depend on others to do anything? It’s a hardship on everyone. Not everyone can afford to give freely.

[@nancypha3576]

Tus txiv tsev txua yam no tim koj 1 leeg xwb vim koj tseem pheej vuag mus cuag koj tsev kwv tij ne tos koj civ niam tij niam ntxawm ntxub neb ua kom neb neej puas kav tsij ua li koj poj niam hais zoo dua nyob nrog kwv tij lo luag tsis hlub neb lawm txhob ntsaw ntsaw kwv tij os koj tsev neeg yog cov khib khib koj ntag cas koj yuav ruam txog qhov koj tseem hlub tseem pab lawv na koj muaj lawv pluag ces lawv npav ua kom neb tuag mus xwb cas koj yuav ntse ua lawv kwv tij ua luaj na muab pab yeeb ncuab no xab lais mus txhob tsaw mus noj mus haus lawv os tim koj xwb vim koj pheej kav khav theeb thiab koj thiaj mag mag teeb meem

[@amponpaplern4695]

คุณเป็นคนไม่รักพ่อคนเป็นพ่อจะเป็นอย่างไรเราต้องเป็นคนใช้

[@kuatxobvh4481]

thaub koj muaj tus laij dab tsi es ho mus pes koj niam tij os pes lawm ces yeej txhais tau tias koj lees yuav niamtij lawm ntag hos kuv xum tuag kuv tsi xum pe niamtij na

[@shengvang9610]

Tuabneeg nyag muaj nyag sab Kuv tug kheej mas yog kuv tug sister los yog kuv tug brother muaj los yog ntse mas kuv txhawb hab zoo sab xwb. Sib hlub sib paab zoo dluas sib kheeb.

[@tsavtxiajlwmlis8531]

Niam ntsuab teev, luag lwm haiv neeg khuxabnas luag hais lwm yam zoo xwb. Ua cas peb hmoob khuxabnas mas phem li no: qaib sib ncaws, nyuj sib daus, life insurance npaj rau qhov tuag thiab qhov kawg lub hleb thwdays, ua li cas peb ua neej mus rau sab kev tuag nkaus xwb!!!!

[@tvang8]

Seem to me like the problem started with $ to buy your wife. Seem like you and your wife did well financially. In my opinion, you and your wife are no different from your brothers and their wives. You and your wife could have still been the better people and not do what they did to you.

[@khouher5412]

Zoo li koj yog ib tug tib neeg uas tsis tshua txawj xav vim nyiaj yog nyiaj nawb txawm yog koj los koj yeej yuav yuav rov qab thiaj naj. Saib koj pub puas tau rau lawv thiab maj mloog koj hais xwb yeej paub hais tias koj siab haj yam me tshaj lawv koj yog ib tug neeg xav kom lwm tus pab koj xwb koj tsis xav pab lwm tus. Kawg hais tias koj txiv kiag koj tseem txiav cais tau naj phem tshaj koj ces tsis muaj li lawm.

[@maryly09]

Nws haj yam pub tsis tau rau leej twg. Nws txiv lub ntees kiag xwb nws twb tsis kam pab. Nws tus tij laug lub ntees xwb nws twb tsis kam pab thiab. Muab hais los nws tseem cuaj khaum tshaj.

[@ameeshayang8949]

Thov mloog tus niam tej sab soj

[@hx7161]

Hmong people need to stop relying on their parents to do THEIR wedding. If you’re a grown adult and can’t even pay the bill for your own wedding then don’t even get married. 🤦🏽‍♀️

[@MsMaivNeeb]

If you can’t afford to marry then don’t. Your siblings should not have been put on the spot and forced to support your wedding expenses. They work hard for their money/savings and have a family to support as well. Go take out a loan from the bank or some place. If you are man enough to marry then be mam enough do deal with your own problems and actions. You are an adult and should not rely on others. Money is always an issue that breaks up a family. If your siblings have the heart to help then good for you but it’s best if you don’t ask.

[@pajlisyaj1716]

Teb chaws no twb muaj hauj Lwm ua twb khwv tau nyiaj es txhob tos tej Laus li nyiaj los nta yus Lub neej yus twb ua hauj lwm khov kho es vim li cas tseem yuav tos lawv nyiaj thiab ,

[@payoaxiong415]

From my observation. The Hmong first to second generations that came to the USA. Still have a small and greedy mind set. Hopefully this is a lesson for the newer generation to open their heart to help each other. Family is very important but it all comes down to support and respect.

[@Ty6475-r1o]

Oh vim nej cov kwv tij ua tsi taus txiv. Nej mloog poj niam lus txhuas tus. Mus lawv neej tsas tau kawg tabsis xav kom txog hnub koj puv 120 xyoo neej tsa leej twg yog tus yuav los lees koj ua kev ua cais rau koj os me kwv? Es koj puas rov mus noog txog kevcais ntawm koj cuab kwv tij lawm. Yog koj tsi mus noog txog tij nov li lawm ces kav xyeem li kos es thiaj li yooj yim xwb os mog.

[@susbcusthao7151]

Some people just can’t stand when someone is better than them. Jealous and evil people will find every little tiny thing to destroy others so they can sleep better at night. These type of individuals will not get far. Karma will hit sooner or later.

[@leevue7803]

Tom nej muaj kev kuv ntxov li no los vim nej yeej tsis txawj sib tsis txawj coj ib tug poj niam xwb es nws yuav tsim yus tsev neeg yeej tsis tau na yog yus ntse txaus

[@panouthao6350]

Never borrow money from families. It’s gonna create conflict. And if you want to get marry, please save money first. Majority of us are just living paycheck to paycheck. You can’t blame your families too.

[@kevinlee4631]

Yog lawm kuv yog 1 tug uas raug cem rau saum KZbin ntag tabsi kuv tsis tu siab vim nws pluag ua yam twg los nws ua tsis yeej kuv nws thiaj li muaj sij hawm mus cem kuv ua cas nws tsis muab lub sij hawm khib ntaw los mus khwv nyiaj

[@lotusvert7024]

Ibqho tseem ceeb kuv xav hais rau nej cov me tub hluas thiab ntxhais hluas na nej twb txawj 2 hais tiam 21 none, nej yuav tsum mus khwv kom nej tau nyiaj ua nej lub tshoob lawm nej niam thiab txiv mam pab qhov tsawg xwb mas thiaj li. Nej twb kawm ntawv tsis tau tag mas twb sib yuav lawm ces nej cov hmoob ameka thiaj pheej muaj2 teebmeem li niaj hnub no lomas.

[@hlubforlife]

This is what happen when women becomes the BOSSES by wearing pants and the guys wears the pink dresses.

[@maikiaher4662]

It is not 1975. If you are not financially stable to marry a wife just don't. Why should anyone else pay for your wife. Same goes for funeral. You and your wife should plan/save for your own funeral. In regards to the story: the guy seems to brag too much about how smarter, richer & has a better life he has. Maybe that's why his clan don't like him 🤔 when ppl are jealous they hate. Hope you have a happily ever after !

[@maivang6987]

Peb twb yog niam tij tiam sis peb tsis lim xyiam li koj kos es peb ua niam tij thiab kwv mas yuav tsum ua neeg kom zoo thiab cov kwv thiaj xav hlub niam thiab tij laug cov menyuam os yog ua ces kuv los yeej tsis xav hlub li nawb mog es txhob ua neeg siab phem22 mas duav thiab ntxub tshaj nplaw es mus ua neej thiaj tsis npam es ua siab kom zoo es thiaj tau ntiuj ntoos thiab los liam xyiam ua luaj li .cov neeg lim xyiam mas ntim ntxub thiab dhuav tshaj plaws lios lawv .

[@houahyang8791]

Yes mostly because of the wife being troubled into the family because each came from different families.. the brothers have to be strong enough to handle their own wife’s…

[@wendylee4892]

The guy in the story is absolutely right though! Hmong marriages/funerals are complicated especially when it comes to the money part. But nowadays, guys should have enough to pay for his bride. The parents absolutely should help too. That’s how you keep the peace and love. ❤ Family is all about supporting one another but if you don’t have the $ to help out your siblings, you’re not obligated and they shouldn’t be offended. But I guess Hmong people never learn and always burn bridges after funerals??

[@maryannthao6029]

Kuv txiv yawg pab wb rooj tshoob $10 dua xwb thaum kuv txiv pub ib puas xyoo kwv tij Phuab peb ib leeg $10 txhiab ces peb 7 Leej ces 70 txhiab xwb mas ua rau tej laus thiaj tau koom hmoov os

[@leevue7803]

Mloog los nej cov kwv tij muab nyiaj los ua qhov tseem ceeb ces yog nej ntag

[@kanetoews7747]

I have a family member like your niam tij and I no longer talk to her and that’s the best decision I ever made

[@maryannthao6029]

Tus niam tij ko liam dhau os

[@laijtebchawslaos6685]

Nplmoog koj zaj neej neeg no mas tsis yog tim ib leeg yog tim nej sawv daws

[@jouvafamily2229]

Some niam tij are full of drama it’s their always the victim. Ours are like that too never had help from them but she always tell the world she does everything for us younger one. But since I’ve been married in this family I’ve not yet seen her help any one but outsiders.

[@viyanaxiong4914]

I would say everyone of you are the same!!! 😢

[@suxiong2240]

This is America, the bank is your brother and sister

[@maryly09]

These ppl must not know how to utilize banks.

[@khlee25]

I think it’s you that keeps thinking negative. Sometimes we think too highly of ourselves, either because of our education or bank account. I think you shouldn’t distance yourself from your family. Your wife is wrong for telling you to ignore or not care about your family. She’s selfish for giving you reasons to care for her family only. You and your wife shouldn’t think that your family is responsible for your wedding. It’s not your brother’s responsibility for that. I think you and your wife shouldn’t even get mad when they ask you to pay them back. If it wasn’t for your brothers, will your wedding go thru? It’s not selfish for their wife to want their money back. Maybe they didn’t have lots of money and did see that you guys received a good amount of money back from your wedding. No one owes you and your wife to have to pay for your wife for you. I don’t know why your wife think your brothers owe you and her that. Your wife shouldn’t pull you away from your family. And not just that but you should know better to not let her brainwashed you and make you have hatred towards your brothers. You guys seems like u guys just didn’t want to pay no one. You guys didn’t seem poor like that. You may not think your brothers are worthy of your time and effort but maybe down the years you’ll regret it somewhat. And also maybe it’s your wife who think she’s too smart and too high educated to get along with your family. I feel bad for men like you sometimes. It’s ok to man up and have a voice. I wouldn’t want to be the man in my relationship and my husband be the girl. You have to know your role. Good luck & take care🙂.

[@nkaujntse5196]

Agree. This guy let his wife makes the decisions only to her benefit not in the interest of the families.

[@touyang3403]

Thov lau, hnov qeej nrov lawm. Ho cia nruas nrog rau peb mloog thiab? Thaum nruas nrov lawm, tsoom mloog mam nrog txiav txim?😅

[@atthao5631]

Neeg phem es quav qab ntxhiab dab tsi.

[@Linkcutevaj]

Ub niag poj dab no mus tsuag 2 os ntxub dhau lawm os

[@lnchannel1186]

It’s not your older siblings responsibility to pay for your wife. Your siblings are struggling just like you feel you are. It sounds like you and your wife are selfish

[@Kyang1992]

Even if your brothers are not struggling, they can use their money for other purposes. I’m sure they have kids to raise and a mortgage to pay.

[@heysoniher]

Yep, he’s selfish and entitled!

[@ThePrincessWorrior]

100% SELFISH

[@nkaujmoobleeg]

🤣free money! That's why! The only thing the older brothers did wrong was that they did not make it clear that they have to pay them back. They assumed it was free money..

[@xwmkabyang354]

cov pojniam phem li no ces kawg tawg kwv tawg tij xwb tiag tij laug tuag ces lawb cuag lawb dab xwb mas.

[@crystalxiong735]

No yog tim niamtij khib thiab siab phem xwb. Ces yog yus cov kwvtij ua tsi taus txiv ces kwvtij kawg sib tawg

[@Kyang1992]

Is this a 2023 story? Hmong men still act this way? Geez, just live together until you can afford the bride price! You should be ashamed for telling your story.

[@jefferythao4243]

Got to be the man my brother

[@hova6421]

Twb nyb teb chawg vam meej log tseem sib txeeb nyiaj thiab phem xb og