Two Dollars... (Better Off Dead)

[@Jsalrulz]

That paperboy is out there. He can't be bargained with. He can't be reasoned with. He doesn't feel pity,or remorse,or fear. And he absolutely will not stop. Ever! Until he gets his two dollars.

[@sha11235]

I would've just given him the two dollars the minute I had it and he showed up. I would make sure it was on me all the time after the first one so when he showed up, I'd give it to him and he'd leave.

[@chowder8802]

back then, two dollars was worth a lot more lol

[@SLee-kx5ke]

@Andrew well to a ten year old kid back in the 80s two dollars was a lot of money.

[@CaliforniaJazzy]

Jsalrulz Sir, this is the best comment I have ever read on the internet. EVER!! Nice Jaws reference!!!

[@ducksnhell]

Jsalrulz or he'll break some knee caps lol

[@amj112233]

30 years later.. "I WANT MY TWO DOLLARS" is still a classic and funny as hell.

[@Dastardly_X]

🌟

[@danb308]

37 years later, still a classic and funny as hell 👍

[@ericbattle4597]

@@danb308 , and still often repeated in the right situations.

[@privateprivate1865]

@@ericbattle4597 true.. like right at the end and youre ready for the cresits, and youve forgotten about 2 dollars.. here he comes .. lol . Perfect tried and true method.

[@ericbattle4597]

@@privateprivate1865 , he comes at the WRONG time. Monique wanted to see Dodger Stadium, and here comes Johnny. Little punk!

[@jareddeorsay6582]

I read an anecdote by John Cusack: years later he was arrested for some reason and was walking the perp walk through the jail. All the inmates started yelling, "I want my two dollars!"

[@watervillegangmember]

God I hope this is true

[@ckotcher1]

thepowerofIandI lmao

[@ckotcher1]

The main paperboy kid Demian Slade was my friend in High School (I was in Junior High actually he was a few years older) his Aunt was my gym teacher. Anyway we went to the mall one time and just about everyone we passed said “TWO DOLLARS!!!” And he just looked at me and said “happens every day” lol 😂 A few years later I met Keith Coogan, the guy from “Don’t tell Mom the babysitters dead” and for him it was the same only it was “The dishes are done man!!” Lol

[@taochi100]

@@ckotcher1 Shit thats crazy.

[@dickflinghammer58]

Only natural. It's the funniest thing ever

[@SillyLittleMunky]

"Didn't ask for a dime." Love it.

[@lorianns3475]

Every time he whips out that comb I just die!!! To freakin funny!

[@robbanta2979]

J.A Maloney ..... cash

[@slayer5813]

@@lorianns3475 "Every time" ? He only does it once throughout the entire movie. More like "Only time".

[@bbbmoody]

That's not even the right quote

[@eulahanderson4987]

[e-mail]

[@ryanjohnson6072]

" I want my two dollars!" "No, I can't swim."

[@SnailMaster]

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! 😂😂😂😂

[@TreonsRealm]

One of my favorite running gags in film history. I love that you can still hear the card clacking of the wheels on the mountain despite the wheels not moving, lol. This remains one of my favorite hidden gem movies since I saw it as a kid on the 80's.

[@tomnguyen8546]

I love how he waits for the garage door to open instead of blocking/catching the newspaper himself.

[@Fl0wchart]

And risk a broken hand? If it can break a window, it can break a hand!

[@kimmyfreak200]

he shoulda used a pool net lol

[@bloofan06]

"Didn't ask for a dime!" My best friend and I would watch this scene over and over and laugh till we cried!

[@fergalstackstreams]

For me it's the half-hearted AHHHHHHHH as he goes over the cliff.

[@ryanm6898]

🤣

[@Neck41]

This kid has a future in the collection agency.

[@randomguyonyoutube9955]

"He can track down anything or anyone"

[@bakulubaka3824]

Lmao 🤣😂🤣😂🤣

[@kimmyfreak200]

or the mob

[@koryandrews1665]

Lol I love the kid's scream when he goes off the mountain. Cheesiest half-hearted scream ever.

[@kimmyfreak200]

ahhhh! lol

[@jet5910]

enters the car wash..."no I can't swim!" lol

[@RudeBuddhist1]

jet fire yeah that's my favorite part too

[@theawesomeone6856]

I can never stop laughing at that scene.

[@gnarlycat]

I love how terrified he is of the paperboy

[@kimmyfreak200]

love when he says OH MY GOD!! in pure terror when he sees him

[@kevinscott4081]

It's one of those movies you can re-watch and it's great every time.

[@filmmaker89]

It always killed me that you could still hear the cards in his spokes even thought he's on skis.

[@ManekiNeko1972]

And his wheels don't move down the slope.

[@kimmyfreak200]

lmao must be the ptsd from dealing with his weird ass lol..

[@wilfordbrimley9554]

I had a cameo in that movie. They only paid me two dollars.

[@sjtimmer7]

You mean: It paid two dollars, but they never actually paid me...

[@Jondsmusic]

Well you made up for it with Quaker Oats ads as well as home medical equipment pitches lol

[@npcDroneClass]

did you give that kid beetus?

[@gmjunky87]

Hope you're managing your beetus well. ❤️

[@AnnusMirabilus]

RIP, brah

[@cgh7337]

"My Grandmother dropped acid & she freaked out.." LOL 😂😂😂😂😂

[@kimmyfreak200]

lol

[@kimmyfreak200]

his whole lie reminded me of orgazmo movie when the mormon guy is trying to lie on the spot about the film he was starring in and he said it was a new version of death of a salesman.. "He didn't die from su!cide in the first film thats what u were led to believe...the CIA killed him for ...selling smack..... to... nazi's"

[@BILLSFANsinceHiTomShady]

legend has it the kid now has 3 kids and a wife but still wants his 2 dollars .

[@basedbattledroid3507]

Legend has it he's also still a paper-boy.

[@Mred9455]

that's Hella Funny

[@Mred9455]

that's Hella Funny

[@Mred9455]

that's Hella Funny

[@TimeTravelinc]

I heard legends that he was a hitman, and was knocked off by the same guy who short changed him.

[@GameaPlaya]

I was laughing my ass off when the paperboys emerged from the woods, that was epic! XD

[@Farrell0208]

…………. KEYYYYSSSSS!!!!!!!!!

[@TheGaminggoddess1]

I have decided my dying words are going to be "two dollars!"

[@DavidSmith-ki2we]

lol thats funny

[@bobsmith8942]

Maybe mine will be, "I can't swim."

[@LEDBOO]

lol. Classic. "Didnt ask for a dime" This kid was gangsta. lol

[@EarthaStoneQueenOfCards]

The kid is a legend lol

[@jruth77]

My little brother was laughing his butt off at when he went over the cliff

[@SkippyBob]

...there's something following them. (crowd gasps) LOL

[@jamesl8478]

2 DOLLARS! (Whish!) Lol take a hike brat...... AHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhh

[@swaggyginger8247]

*enters car wash* NO I CANT SWIM worlds greatest movie

[@FunkySaurb456]

As a former paperboy myself, I can sympathize with the boy's persistence in getting his payment. Collections at the end of the month were always a bitch, and sometimes you had to put in extra effort to ensure you got paid. That this gag was exaggerated through the whole film made it doubly hilarious for me, as I often found myself in similar situations. :-)

[@tyr7876]

You've mastered the ability to create shadow clones of yourself? Simply increadible.

[@pbsfinest2004]

This kid's persistence is admirable. He is my hero!

[@emmanueldunk8290]

This is one of my all time favourite movies because it's so fucking original, is extremely entertaining with all the surrealism and plots woven together and can appeal to kids, teenangers and adults. It's 80s cinema at it's finest.

[@Farrell0208]

Back when things weren’t so PC and you didn’t have to worry about misinterpretation going off the deep end and everyone’s feelings being “hurt”.

[@jasontodd7496]

when you teach your kids the value of money

[@ginnrollins211]

You don't understand, this paperboy is the bringer of smashed windows. He will never eat. He will sleep. He will never stop until he gets his two dollars.

[@WingDiamond]

Love your avie, Lucy Loud Rulez!

[@ginnrollins211]

@@WingDiamond Thanks. :)

[@rozzie101]

I don't really remember the movie, but after all these years I remember that kid yelling 2 DOLLARS!!! I want my 2 dollars!!!

[@joshburns4611]

Same here. I was 5 years old when this movie came out and hadn't seen it since till now, but i will always remember that line. I forgot how scary and creepy that little fucker was.

[@garrisonnichols7372]

It's Better Off Dead from 1985 I believe.

[@joshuahilliker2364]

I remember in fifth grade when we were asked to donate 2 dollars for something I can’t remember, and the teacher, being somebody with an actual soul, played this movie clip to show how important it was for each of us to give 2 dollars. Again, I don’t remember what it was that we were donating for.

[@kelabell6330]

This shit was to funny lol straight classic they dont make movies like this no more the 80s was so cool.

[@BushidoBrown76]

KEYS!!! My brother and I would always say that whenever something was about to go wrong...LOL

[@markthomas9273]

One of the best 80’s movies!!!

[@ericalderson8702]

My son was telling me that I owe him $2 for the past week. I showed him this video and it made him smile.

[@not.supermario]

The way he fixed his bike with skis earns my respect. I've never seen anyone do that before.

[@czechmex88]

5:19 That was the most relaxing death in movie history -_- ahhhhhhhhhh.................

[@TheDemolitionMan100]

LOL . ._.

[@SuperCJ9112]

but he didn't die

[@sbatou87]

They never did find his body.

[@thewhoman3182]

Stalin pushed him off the mountain as he was in the way of the skiing contest he fell off from a high distance yet still miraculously managed to survive...

[@thfpt]

I half expected a parachute to pop out of somewhere. That kid is resilient and relentless...

[@alexanaya6820]

sorry kid I ain't got a dime, didn't ask for a dime, 2 dollars! cash..😂😂😂😂✌

[@Shockzone1495]

Legend has it Jonny is still searching for his $2.00 decades later.

[@whiterooksme]

I was just like that paper boy. Spent all my free time trying to collect paper route money from deadbeats always trying to get out of paying a couple bucks for a months worth of work.

[@dosbaggos5575]

Worse job ever! Getting back several bounced checks, move outs .

[@xomthood]

No joke, if deadbeats didn't pay, the paperboy takes the hit.

[@realperson9104]

I mean, in the case of the movie, the reason they didn’t want to pay him is because he kept breaking people’s windows

[@Ejb905]

Me also. From 1984-93 most of the time i was a paperboy delivering the Montreal Gazette. I worked about 10 hours a week, i made about a dollar per paper a week. 200 papers, $200 then tips, I payed my way thru university, cash upfront, No taxes to speak of

[@Ejb905]

@@xomthood When people were assholes and lived in mansions and didnt pay they'd get woken up by a paper hitting their windows and doors LOUD!!! And if i really didnt like the customer and they left their milk bottles out for pickup they'd be shattered

[@drooliuscesar3654]

One of my favorite movies! My younger brother owes me $2 and I've been harassing him, "I wan't my $2 dollars!" Over and over! He doesn't get it because he wasn't born yet. He just thinks I'm weird. 😂

[@maryellenkeehmer8020]

I grew up with this movie..thought it was funny then and can't wait to get a DVD of it now...it's one to share

[@harleygal420]

I remember this movie. Loved it. Still do and I still want my two dollars. Lol.....

[@Skinsfaninjerz]

me and my dad used to crack up watching this. i showed to my son a couple years ago. he cried laughing he's 19 now and still quotes parts to this movie.

[@randomfools808]

The way they tied this in for the motivation in the final scene is amazing. Can't believe it took me this long to see this.

[@devine999]

The looks on the kids face in the first scene...so angry. Great acting. This movie had so many side gags, fantastic. And just the fact he just doesn't give him the 2 dollars, but decides to always run.

[@zrocks2001]

lol great movie when i was a kid that was the phrase of the summer back then

[@Revelation6_7-8]

+zrocks2001 still a great movie. still a common phrase.

[@whogoesthere9306]

+Revelation6_7-8 Agreed. Was just quoting this to my friend!

[@Revelation6_7-8]

Toundelea Johbson didnt ask for a dime...

[@DavidSmith-ki2we]

i know right?? lol

[@scottbuckmoyer477]

you're right this movie is one of my favorites

[@bombsawaykitty3955]

I'm honestly impressed how many people were craving some better off dead ✨️ never met another soul who've seen this outside of me and my brother! Rock on.

[@dwightkeen5160]

One of the all time best movies ever! Loved it when I was a kid! Wished I could've had a car like that too! Good times!

[@tassco.thec.e.o.of2am]

🤣😆😂 Sooooo funny watching this as a kid 😂😆🤣 And I was a Paper Girl, so I feel his pain😂😆🤣

[@basedbattledroid3507]

Did he say his grandmother hijacked a school bus full of penguins?

[@hsaladwegg]

Yep, after she dropped acid.

[@raymondsolisjr.1262]

It was the 80s

[@gentlegiant6585]

Yep 👍🚌🐧😎!

[@allenstaab5416]

@@raymondsolisjr.1262 Dropped acid first the hijacked a buss full of penguins

[@chrisauten2039]

One of those movies u never forget especially the part about the paper boy!

[@TheQuintox1]

they paid homage to "i want my two dollars" in the movie hot tub time machine. right in front of john cusack.

[@Theomite]

I think that line was ADR. The guy said it off-screen. John's pretty touchy about his comedy work in the 80s for some stupid reason.

[@TheGhostofMrArthurs]

@@Theomite GTFOH really? Fuck that thats all i know him as. This, One Crazy SUmmer, that shit is endlessly quotable

[@missymyers9786]

Crimson Shadow He wouldn’t be acting today, if not for those ‘80’s movies’ he was in. He needs to get over it, cuz it made him RICH AND FAMOUS THE PAST 40 YEARS!! He’d be in a trailer or apt in nowhere USA WATCHING HTTM on DVD. I get bummed when I hear actors who’s early work MADE THE WAY for their start and so few got that back then, and now want nothing to do with the reason they have the life they even have. It’s called UNGRATEFUL that you even got the role, or often, were lucky to be BORN into it, and nepotism that put em there.

[@dcaseng]

@@missymyers9786 This is why i don' like knowing too much about entertainers, they usually end up disappointing you. Fuck Cusack, this is one of his best films. He should be proud of it, but these people always end up thinking they are the next Shakespeare.

[@Farrell0208]

@@TheGhostofMrArthurs he’s gone on to say this was his least liked movie he worked in.

[@girtisholland]

I’m into obscure cult Halloween costumes and this one is on my list for potentials. I’ll obviously have to make an obligatory “$2 dollar” sign to save from explaining it all night, but it’ll be a hit with people of my mindset lol

[@notta3d]

That is such a great comeback line? "Didn't ask for a dime."

[@ciao7371]

One of my all time favorite movies, I feel sorry for those who never saw it!! great soundtrack to boot!!!

[@omartyre]

Little guy said he cant swim..classic...

[@IMTony245]

I would love it if they brought back both actors to do one of these scenes for a commercial screaming, “Two dollars!” 🤣

[@ZovietUnionBlox]

This is making me laugh so hard xD "I want my two dollars!" LOL

[@esrayildiz5287]

My childhood in one phrase! Good memories

[@ExplicitstyleXXX]

omg i was telling my son about this little boy today. Thanks for making the video it brings back memories.

[@mindriot91_96]

Classic cult movie from the 1980's, a true gem.

[@KBez73]

"Didn't ask for a dime." Maybe it's just me but, this movie is hilarious. Possibly you require a sense of humor to enjoy. Also, weed helps.

[@AdhamOhm]

Would he take 20 dimes?

[@thediamondlord8528]

*shoves foot in door* Didn't ask for a dime. 2 dollars.

[@alyssakomorek5410]

Elishah KB I cannot stop laughing!!!

[@Rockyinlp]

This movie is awesome

[@fritzbucher4726]

No! I can’t swim! 🤣🤣🤣🤣 I loved this movie growing up. I know I wore out at least 1 vhs tape 🤣🤣🤣

[@johnnygasparini32]

i want my two dollars!

[@jaygasper4853]

Johnny Gasparini great name!

[@5150Reaper]

Johnny Gasparini 🤣

[@theprotector6099]

Generation Z in a nutshell

[@Aaron17988]

What now? Go outta here get lost Take a hike brat

[@juicer67]

That is one determined little kid.

[@bobhope8412]

My favorite movie of all time. Stupid nostalgic reasons but still my favorite go to when I need a laugh. LOVE it.

[@MrGretajean]

Thanks for putting the best segments together..These are the most memorable ones!

[@cherylwilcox9648]

One of my favorite movies!

[@GarretGrayCamera]

That night scene with the other paperboys is so well done. I like how they all had their paper bags on, despite being off work.

[@eyesuckle]

When you're a paperboy trying to collect. . . you're *never* off work.

[@kimmyfreak200]

haha its their gang colors

[@MarvelousLXVII]

That was such a great movie! Probably my favorite of the 80s.

[@Silverwind87]

Just be thankful he's not charging interest. He'd owe the kid five pounds of 24 karat gold, three twelve ton cells of high-voltage plasma from Russia, every holographic legendary Pokemon card in a laminated cardbook bound in the foreskins of the full cast of Jungle 2 Jungle and maybe Jumanji and The Notebook, depending on amount of leather required, a sandwich, my brother's sandwich, 30 human souls... and two dollars.

[@jamesvanitas]

That’s oddly specific

[@DEAH-01]

I refer to this all the time , it is hilarious! Tx for posting .

[@jebby16]

That final scene was priceless!!!!. This and Ferris Bueller were my favs.

[@randomsasquatchwithwifi4090]

you can tell the approximate age of a person if you randomly say the phrase, "two dollars", and they instantaneously know the reference.

[@speeddemon4539]

John Cusack is legendary!

[@ellisonlowrimore7751]

Still one of my favorite movies of all time!

[@timm_3r]

*goes into car wash* "I can't swim!" xd

[@heathermathias9193]

Thank you!!! It's one of the movie quotes I actually remember and have always had and people look at me like I'm crazy!

[@DavidSmith-ki2we]

they obviously didnt experience this awesome movie then lol

[@robertclarkguitar]

I miss these days. Born 72...by mid 80s the movies brat pack and all were kick ass.

[@jhightest-u5g]

Thank you for putting that together dragonlord! I was just watching Premium Rush and whenever the bike cop was chasing the messengers all I could think of was those scenes with Johnny the paperboy. Love that movie!

[@thatepisodesimp4469]

"It's Kiiinda a family crisis soo" Love that 😂😂

[@markplotkin1166]

One classic 80s movie 🍿

[@EnchantedPlantQueen]

i showed this to my 9 year old who was hounding me for 3 dollars...its still relevant. thanks for compiling this awesome clip!

[@ManorHQ]

2:19 Dustin Henderson became a paperboy in 1985. Stranger things have been known to happen.

[@Joe_334]

You missed the part when the garage door slid down, lmao!

[@tendrago444]

Omgggggh, this was classic

[@HypeMaster1473]

This is both scary as hell and Funny as hell!

[@Mrphy86]

One of my favorite movies ever

[@basedbattledroid3507]

The back of a mal teasers packet brought me here. Also Lol, 'I Can't swim' when they're going through a car wash

[@jayoshay3709]

Such a great 80s classic!!!

[@markgiordonello6710]

they don't em like this anymore....classic 80's

[@vegasnative6394]

Why can’t this be available on any/some platform to BUY!!! One of the best 80’s movies!!

[@ArttuTheCat]

I bought this movie on DVD from a flea market back in the mid 2010's 😺👍.

[@gentlegiant6585]

Just quoted this to my brother who is 9 years younger than me. However, we both went to school in the 80's. I graduated Poway high (San Diego county) class of 1985. Actually saw this in the theater 😎🇺🇸

[@herbgardner420]

J.G. Wentworth, the early years. "It's my money and I need it now!"

[@MrBadBoy2105]

how persistent is this kid

[@justinbusby1860]

Thank you dragonlord1958 this is great.

[@ZyxthePest]

Personally, I love "I can't swim! Ahhhhhh..." Just because of its sheer stupidity.

[@chiefnut48]

What a great movie and thanks for posting this one.

[@regularguyfixes3142]

Next to Back to the future this is one of my fav 80s movies. One crazy summer good to.

[@louderbro8382]

Thanks for posting dragonlord1958 you are a true og webmaster. This paperboy was a coffee room topic (there's a spandex biker around here who pops out of nowhere scolding pedestrians and motorists) but couldn't remember if it was Zapped! Valley Girls or what movie .

[@pimpinsi]

Damn kid wanted them two dollars

[@HSG_YT]

***** I know right! It just gets to me every single time I think about it XD