Unexpected Italian Lessons: Body Language, Food, and Caring for Others

[@kristenandscott]

If you have ever been to Italy or another foreign country, what nonverbals have confused you?

[@Ponkelina]

Fascinating!

[@kristenandscott]

I know, right? Everyday I am learning something about myself and the culture!

[@Ponkelina]

@@kristenandscott Wonderful insights. Are you not planning to buy a place there or move there?

[@kristenandscott]

@Ponkelina My husband and I have been talking about it. We are causally looking. So, hopefully? We shall see what the future holds.

[@mamma8786]

I think every culture has it's body language in fact I see it vary slightly even with in families. I get nervous when people start to talk with there hands don't speak that language. LOL Off topic but we just got back from our mission trip with MDS. We did alot of work helping the AME church there in Punta Gorda try to clean up. The boats that washed up on the streets were amazing .Thought of you while we were there, hope you places were OK.

[@kristenandscott]

So true. Yeah, I saw the boats still of the sides of the highways in Punta Gorda. Our place came through the hurricane just fine! Thanks for asking. For those of you curious, this is our place and the area we are talking about! kzbin.info/www/bejne/jXLCZoShnK6GlbM

[@giorgiodifrancesco4590]

So, Italian gestures are complicated. Depending on the rotation of the hand (in one direction or the opposite) the meaning changes and can mean “come closer” or “move away.” It is a movement that is made only when complicity is sought. You cannot perceive the meaning of the rotation because you come from a different cultural background. As for, on the other hand, “bella figura” is something the person has to put on, to show others what kind of person he or she is, both outwardly and inwardly. It does not mean being superficial and only looking out for appearances. Rather, it is respecting oneself in order to be respected by the rest of the world. It is not a uniquely feminine thing. The concept of “moderation” you understood it well and also the concept of female “sensuality.”

[@kristenandscott]

Yeah, you know another viewer also pointed out that I missed the nuance of the hand rotation. All looked the same to me! 😂 Regarding, Bella Figura, I totally agree. That is what I was trying to get across. I think the way one presents themself on the outside is a reflection on the inner self. Thanks for watching and for sharing your insights. I am always looking to learn!

[@voiceyourresilience209]

Adoro i tuoi video! I have just returned to the States after 6 months in Italy. Living there, I felt SO alive, as well! Have had the same observations of the culture, how women carry themselves at all ages! I'm also in the arts (opera singer/teaching artist). Everytime I watch one of your videos, I'm amazed at our commonalities. Buona fortuna con la tua procedura di passaporto!

[@kristenandscott]

That is amazing! Were you studying in Italy? or here for something else all together? Are there any videos of you singing online I could check out? Thanks for the well wishing regarding my citizenship journey.

[@voiceyourresilience209]

Here's an Ave Maria I improvised in a church in Guglionesi a few weeks ago... kzbin.info/www/bejne/fJSqY2uEhKtgsK8si=XOrv2c2pWaeFNZcz Yes -- I was mainly living in Perugia studying Italian and trying out living there long term with husband supporting me :) Am also a dual and returned to my grandfather's village in Campagna just a couple weeks ago!

[@italianspoken]

Italy must have been an amazing experience for you as an artist and singer! Did you feel a different kind of appreciation for art there compared to the states?

[@voiceyourresilience209]

@italianspoken depends on where you are. But in Perugia, absolutely! It's deep in the fabric of the culture.

[@janmarsh5643]

Ah Kirsten, I will be sad when your stay comes to an end but I know too your husband and son must miss you too. I have loved all that you have described about the things you have learnt. Especially about la bella figura. That’s inspiring. ❤❤❤❤

[@kristenandscott]

Thank you. But when I leave Italy, it will not be forever. The adventure will continue. Plans are in the works!

[@janmarsh5643]

@@kristenandscott oh that’s a relief. For a long time I have wanted to return to Italy and have been learning Italian on and off between life’s dramas. The two visits I experienced were the happiest in my life. I am now 77 years old and I live in hope that I will be fit enough to make another trip. It would be a dream come true. ♥️♥️♥️

[@kristenandscott]

@janmarsh5643 Fingers crossed that you will be able to do that someday.

[@tonimariehurley]

I love your blouse and matching eye glasses!

[@kristenandscott]

Thanks a bunch!

[@GreenThumbGardener65]

Very interesting! Now I understand some of the things my Mom did from time to time. 😊

[@kristenandscott]

@@GreenThumbGardener65 It is true. It helps me understand my grandparents as well.

[@cathleencrobons]

I’m a mom of 4 and married for over 25 years…I often wonder about taking a trip to by myself and rediscover who I am 🙂 It’s wonderful to see you doing this!

[@kristenandscott]

I am a mom of two. Certainly didn't make this decision lightly, and not without the blessing of my son and husband. But that being said, it has certainly been a trip of self-discovery and better understanding who I am! I checked out you channel btw! Loving the vibe!

[@cathleencrobons]

@@kristenandscott Thanks! I feel such a big tug to venture alone. Not because I want to be away from my family but because I really do forget who “I am”…not to get all mushy. But life is a lot at times☺️ Thank you for sharing so openly with your journey!

[@kristenandscott]

@cathleencrobons That is indeed.

[@LeeMoraglio]

When Conan and Jordan went to Italy, they visited a winery. During a wine tasting, Jordan (who has been to Italy many times) told Conan that he was holding his wine glass incorrectly and described it as a "bruta figura," or inelegant. Conan was holding the glass instead of just the stem. I hope you get a chance to also visit the rest of Sicily. You are so close to Palermo, Catania, Taormina, Syracuse, and Mount Etna. You could probably see a lot of the east coast over the course of a long weekend, and there are trains and buses that can get you there. Everyone wants to visit Taormina because it's beautiful, but also because it is where season 2 of White Lotus took place. Observing differences in culture is fascinating. Your description of la bella figura was very interesting. I'm so glad that you are enjoying your time there. Your videos have been very interesting! Continued good luck with your efforts to become a dual citizen.

[@kristenandscott]

Bruta fugura! Makes sense! I did visit Palermo with Laura my cousin who has been in some of our videos. Working on a future video of Palermo, which should probably be out in a few weeks. There are definitely may places I have not visited yet and which are worth visiting! When we visited Sicily in 2017, Scott and Kiefer climbed Mount Etna.

[@rosaliegalasso791]

Buona fortuna, enjoying your experience, Italian Americans share this wanting to know our ancestors village, life, and to connect. Going to Italy to visit multiple times, over decades, has made me feel more American than I thought I could be and yet the call of the ancestors is so deep and sincere that it make me feel deeply conected. Learning Italian helps so much. Yet, one thing I miss while in Italy, is I don't know what is proper, or expected because it is a different culture, here I know what to expect, there it is somewhat of a mystery, even in the arms of my family. ( I also found that most Italian women, know so much, how to make a bargain at the store or market, how to put an outfit together, how to throw on a scarf and look gorgeous, how to cook really easy things that are delicious. how to cure an earache, you name it, they know it, )

[@kristenandscott]

Very true! I think I have noticed that longing in many Italian Americans as well. I have also noticed in in Irish descendants. The people I have encountered are, in general, glad they have come to America, but have this longing to see, visit, stay for a bit, in their country of ancestry, Dare I say they have perhaps romanticized it a bit. I think though it is our longing to feel connect to people and to something that drives this.

[@sharonbarresi9725]

How goes the progress on the dual citizenship? You are a great story teller! 🐈‍⬛

[@kristenandscott]

It is STILL moving forward....I hope to share an update soon!

[@alemassa6632]

"Moderation" is the key word.

[@kristenandscott]

@alemassa6632 Yeah. Not always easy...

[@diane7925]

You should definitely buy a house there, even if it’s as a holiday home for now. You’re appreciating the difference of a life there & how it’s affecting your soul 😊

[@kristenandscott]

@diane7925 Awe...that IS a good reason...my husband and I definitely have that on our radar.

[@yingyang6080]

The gesture you show at the begining of the video it actually means "go away" or "don't come here" or even shooing somebody away. The one you mean - "come here" or "please approach" - is done with hand moving in the opposite direction, not outward, but inward. Better get it right as otherwise you might offend somebody or, at best, get the opposite result of what you mean.

[@kristenandscott]

I had a few other people indicate that I missed the nuance of the hand gesture.....

[@goodboy65]

mi sembra strano che in siclia facciano il gesto opposto al resto dell'italia. hai fraintesto il movimento che inizia con le dita in orizzontale e poi si piega il polso si abbassano e significa vieni qui se invece inizia con il polso piegato le dita verso il basso e finisce con le dita in orizzontale significa vai via.

[@kristenandscott]

Ahhh ok. Thank you for clarifying. I guess as a foreigner, I did not catch the nuance of it.

[@italianspoken]

I was raised in New York, (my father is from Calabria) and the Italian community here is so unique that it became it's own culture. It’s fascinating how similar, yet different, the Italian-American culture is compared to Italy. Did you grow up with a different version of Italian-American culture than the one you're experiencing in Italy?

[@kristenandscott]

@italianspoken Yeah. I grew up in Edison, New Jersey. My mother, who spoke Italian growing up, refused to speak as a teenager due to the stigma attached to Italians in America early in the 20th century. So while I always referred to myself as Italian, the culture was a blend of Italian and American influences.

[@italianspoken]

​@@kristenandscott We have similar experiences! My father always said it was easier to speak English since we’re in America, but he regrets not teaching me more Italian growing up, and it weighs heavily on him. I took it upon myself to learn in every way I could, so I could connect with my family in Calabria. I can’t imagine my life without being able to speak with them. That being said, I truly admire what you do and the sacrifices you're making to ensure the next generation has the chance to connect with the culture 💕.

[@kristenandscott]

@italianspoken Thank you. It is a temporary sacrifice being away from my family, but they are coming to visit over Thanksgiving break so I am excited!

[@robertoposa1120]

Congratulations - your best video so far - you have a lot of Sicilian genes in your blood and you might become a real Sicilian

[@kristenandscott]

@@robertoposa1120 Thanks!

[@GianniPT]

How are your Italian language skills progressing? Do you notice an improvement? When I was in Sicily, I had just completed Italian A1. I was able to do some very basic things like order in a restaurant, but not much beyond that. After just a couple of weeks I found that my listening skills improved a lot. Are you attending language classes?

[@kristenandscott]

I don’t wanna sound braggy, but I’m definitely getting better. My Italian friends comments on it and it’s great! 😊

[@GianniPT]

@ You earned the right to brag! That’s great!

[@enricacantori2984]

Vorrei chiederLe: ora si trova in Italia per il tempo necessario ad ottenere la cittadinanza, in questo periodo Lei sta facendo un percorso personale sicuramente gratificante, ma, mi sembra di capire, più resta in Italia e più le mancano, ovviamente, la Sua famiglia, le sue abitudini, il suo modo di vivere; una volta ottenuta la cittadinanza la userà per cosa? Questo Le permetterà di trasmetterla anche a Suo figlio, che di italiano non ha niente.

[@kristenandscott]

So let me answer the question this way: 1. One of the reasons for pursuing dual citizenship is that my husband and I might live here one day. While we have not made any final decisions regarding that, we are certainly talking about it. I would love to do that, and he is open to it. 2. He is coming to visit soon. I'm so excited. Kiefer is coming as well. 3. My husband is looking to retire next year, and we are looking to move overseas. Initially, it will most likely be Portugal. My son is looking to study there. But after that, who knows?

[@enricacantori2984]

​@@kristenandscottSenza polemica: avrei preferito che mi rispondesse in Italiano, comunque grazie...

[@kristenandscott]

Lol. I will do my best. My written Italian is terrible though. -->. Lol. Farò del mio meglio. Il mio italiano scritto però è pessimo.