Uninvited Guests Series 2 Episode 28

to present arthur lowe, john lebezra and clive dunn in dad's army, [ Applause, ], uninvited guests, featuring john larry, arnold ridley and ian lavender. With this week's guest bill, pertwee, frank williams and edward sinclair, [, Music ] here is the news of this is john snyder reading it as the nazis scourge sweeps Relentlessly across europe.
Scattering whole nations like so much chaff before the wind. We at home give grateful thanks to the brave men of the home guard, who are on constant alert ready to repel any nazi invader, foolhardy enough to step ashore on british soil. It is office in the church hall at warmington on sea.
Captain mannering is talking to the chief arp warden i'll just say, i'm very sorry to hear about your hq yeah blunderbits. It was I'm glad to see that you escaped unharmed. I wasn't in there very fortunate I was in the boozer yeah.
Well, that's how i'm very sorry, but I didn't see what I can do well, as my quarters have been put out of action. I've official permission to use this. All here swallow the earth hall and who's.
The solitaire see yourself. There's a letter from the town club count assigned by the vicar. Now i'm a reasonable man.
We've had our differences In the past mannering, but we're both on the same side and i'm going to be generous. I'm not shutting you out altogether. I'm prepared to go shares with you.
You can keep that end of the office by the window and i'll. Have this end? What are you doing just making a chalk line on the floor, so we know where we stand now when it comes to the desk. You keep your stuff on that side and i'll keep Mine on this side.
Don't you dare put chalk marks on my desk? I'm only trying to be reasonable and fair. I should rub it out. Well i'll talk it again and i'll rub it out again.
Look, I can talk quicker than you can rub mate now. You've probably noticed that both the doors are in my arm. I'm going to be fair.
I'll put a chalk mark down the middle of the floor like this, and over here like this Now that'll give you a path to the doors. That's tom, tiddler's ground. I've had just about enough of this.
Oh, just i'm gon na get back you're standing on my bit. This is absurd. Now, the only thing I have to insist on is the phone that has to be in my arm.
No, no, it doesn't. This is my artery of communication. If hitler invades some other part of the coast first, that is how I shall be informed yeah.
Well, it's my artery. Every Time the siren sounds, if hitler's coming i'll take a message for you, this phone stays exactly where it is, and I give you precisely five seconds to get out of this office. One two: three: four: five: i'm not going we'll see about that wilson jones, yes escort this person from my headquarters.
I'm sorry mate, i'm staying here. This is my headquarters. Wilson prepare to carry out my orders Now.
Would you mind leaving like the captain says, no look. I've got authority from the town clerk, then it is in black and white. If you do not leave you'll.
Have this bed up you and you will not like it might. What you're doing with that? Shall I give him the cold still, so the old coal still is steady right. I'm going but you'll hear more of this well done jones.
They don't like the coal still, so they Can't counter that old filter. Oh we'll see the last of him. I don't think we have today.
What do you mean i'm here just a minute, not too close to the window, or they see you, but hodges has colored the vicar and a virgin he's done it now. Vickery has done it now. Do try and control yourself.
Mr hodges whatever's up mr rogers, you look like a soul in torment. Is that mannering? I love him. I will i'll.
Have him do stop jumping About mr hodges you'll. Do yourself an injury now? What happened? He threatened me with a bayonet? Oh, never did you hear that your reverence it's true, mr hodges. Of course it's true if I hadn't got out quickly to cut me to ribbons here.
You live it by the sword, shall perish by the sword, and that goes for bainits and all I don't think, there's any need to get quite so dramatic, mr yakman i'll go in and have a word with captain batman. I shall be right at your side. Your Reverence, who knows where they'll strike next yes and i'll, be right behind you well come on, then we'll go in through the side door.
That's the nearest! Oh lord! What is it wilson? I think we're in for a visit from the three wise men. Aren't you worried, sir, got a cold steel ready, sir i've got a culture jones. Put that banner away.
Ah, mr battery, would you mind not using that door in future vicar? It's for my own personal use, mr maverick, I think You're, forgetting the whole of the hall, is church property and i've, given mr hodges here permission to use this office now I understand that he's been molested. Yeah threatened me with a bayonet, nothing but vandals. They are.

[@craigcrawford685]

“Shall I give ‘em the cold steel,sir?”😂

[@courtneyrushfirth]

They don't like it up 'em

[@minicle426]

Always enjoyed Frazer's stories.

[@vincentskinner3250]

“Pike” 😂