EXPOSING MY PERFUME ADDICTION AND FACING THE CONSEQUENCES

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U Smells Good

U Smells Good

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер: 322
@justaddlight
@justaddlight 5 жыл бұрын
Really glad to see you have such a supportive wife Eugene. Just as you mentioned, most physicians would likely tout that any behaviour or stimulant that directly activates certain neurological pleasure centres or results in a serotonin cascade can habituate an organism's biology to expect a continuous influx of that same stimulus, or else seek any means to obtain it. Unfortunately, the psychological parameters may be far more complex (and yet, rather easy to deal with). To be brief, it may be advantageous to seek counsel with a competent hypnotherapist that would essentially take you to the root of the problem on a subconscious level - be that a physical, emotional, ontological event or otherwise - allow you to make the appropriate changes/healing, and finally examine how those changes would manifest for you in the future. That's the beauty with working at those levels. It can take as little as one session. There's no need to give up collecting (or smelling perfumes) IMO, as long as the root is dealt with and a certain resultant objectiveness exists between yourself and "the juice". Although, it's very possible that you'll see perfumes differently afterwards (in a good way) and naturally want to sell some stuff to help others experience your passion. I went through something similar in the past and for me, it wasn't about what external objects brought me, but what they didn't bring me that a part of myself expected. Essentially, it was a way of distracting myself or "silencing a budding warning" within me, similar to the psychology procrastination. The behaviour of obtaining was sufficient to create the illusion of progress by giving me a tangible item (a result) onto which I would deliberately (subconsciously) project the idea of insufficiency, thereby feeding the cycle. For me, the solution was not about quenching a need per se, but understanding my relationship to it from a mental perspective, namely that part of me was looking out for my wellbeing. Once I began to listen and take the proper action, I became aware that the budding warning was about something completely different, that involved how objects mediated my relationship with others. Gotta love those base notes huh... Anyway, as far as perfume addictions go, it sounds to me that with your unique insight, you may want to write a book! It could offer health professionals a more personal perspective on the issue and how to better counsel others facing similar circumstances. I applaud your courage in coming forward Eugene and offer sincere thanks to Maria for her wonderful feedback! Happy 19th Birthday to her btw! Two more years and she can drink. lol Mandatory viewing for everyone in the community as far as I'm concerned.
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
Oh I love your feedback on so many levels. I am big on mindset work, digging deep and understanding the why behind our actions. I am really into anything that deepens the relationship with oneself. I believe that we have the power to change...even if that means getting a little guidance. Thanks for the birthday wishes. I am almost "over the hill". :)
@smellslikejosh2406
@smellslikejosh2406 5 жыл бұрын
You bring up a great point which is the aspect of it really NOT fulfilling what we are expecting it to. If we begin looking for our satisfaction from purchasing something, we will always be wanting. Because it never truly satisfies. I think the trick and hard part if find long ways to satisfy that place within us with healthy things. Then the perfume can just be fun and icing on the top.
@BrighterThanYours
@BrighterThanYours 5 жыл бұрын
Step 1 (pacify) CATALOG.... pull out a journal and every single day when you get that feeling like you want to buy more grab a bottle you already have. Start a catalog of the notes and the perfumer and some history about it. Then write how that particular perfume makes you feel. EVERYDAY make this a priority. You will strengthen your appreciation for what is there and not feel the need to add more. The only time you should add more is when it’s a development of the collection and not so much an “addition” if that makes sense. Step 2 (alleviate the clutter) sell whatever you have no used in an extended period of time. Scents that you have that are “clones”need to go. Find the best one of the bunch and sack the rest gladiator style. Try to condense and let the BEST remain only. All things do not need to be collected otherwise you’d be collecting dollar store copies right? Anyway good luck and I hope that you read this comment because this helps me.
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
Great idea!
@Amyleonhardt947
@Amyleonhardt947 5 жыл бұрын
Excellent advice! I think I should do this!
@Liev.H
@Liev.H 5 жыл бұрын
😮
@rbebawi1
@rbebawi1 5 жыл бұрын
She is Amazingly smart. you are lucky to have her on your side.
@peteyleewheatstraw6093
@peteyleewheatstraw6093 5 жыл бұрын
My wife and I raised 5 kids and we basically done without for many years because all our finances seemed to go towards their upbringing. They are all grown now and own their own. My wife took up crafting and makes many beautiful things for our house and our kids houses. I took up several hobbies but the fragrance hobby really pleased me. Now that we have lots of extra money It is really not a worry about how much she spends or I spend. We are just happy now to be alive and healthy. She buys what she wants and I buy 5 bottles of cologne at once. She is happy I am happy. When you guys get older and the kids are gone you will be looking for something to do. My wife now crafts and sells some of her work. I usually garden,do wood work and collect cologne. One day she and I will be dead and nobody will care what we did to get our kicks post family life.
@jenic_7455
@jenic_7455 5 жыл бұрын
Realest post in all of fragcom. Realest post I’ve watched on KZbin, period, in a very long time. Thank you so much for being real, brave and honest. After years of frag addiction, I’m deeply in debt, embarrassed, trying to dig out without my family finding out. Your wife is wonderful. Please keep posting updates. Very inspirational. ❤️
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
I am glad this video stirred something within. It is very brave of you to admit to where you currently are in your journey. This is not about being perfect. There is no such thing. It is about being aware of how our emotions and thoughts drive our actions. We, humans, know deep done whether something is really good for us or not. If it is not, then taking a step into a different direction. We need to get comfortable with asking WHY we do the things we do. Even if it feels uncomfortable.
@MrStewbee
@MrStewbee 4 жыл бұрын
I can't tell you how much I appreciate this post... I've participated in many collecting addictions through the years, and now that I am 70, I have accumulated so much stuff that I never needed in the first place. I wish I could convert it all back to cash and lost time with loved ones... Thank you both so much for this inside look.
@smellslikejosh2406
@smellslikejosh2406 5 жыл бұрын
Amazing video man. Brave and vulnerable and kind. I take it to heart man thanks for doing this and thanks to your wife for doing this. This is a really important conversation. Great video.
@eve123w8
@eve123w8 5 жыл бұрын
Oh wow. This hit home. Happy birthday Maria! Please come back and talk more about visualization and creating new behaviors.
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you! Thats a great idea!
@TheVoid964
@TheVoid964 3 жыл бұрын
Never watched this channel before but damn this video hits hard, for real. Feels like the most real content I’ve seen in a long time.
@davidsantiago1380
@davidsantiago1380 5 жыл бұрын
Dear Eugene and Maria: thank you for sharing this video. It takes plenty of courage to publicly acknowledge and talk about personal experiences, moreover vulnerabilities, so I praise you both for that. The content: oh how complex! It’s been one that had me controversially immersed with agreements and disagreements until I finally decided to agree on María’s statement. I think we all have addictions (in greater and/or lesser levels). In a society of generalized anxiety, stress, and many other health-threatening triggers, we must find a way to “escape” to our safe havens, or “spiritual temples”. This, however, must be absolutely controlled to maintain sanctity and order. If it gets out of control, then intervention is required. I do praise you both for sharing your experiences with these personal temples and for showing us where the thin line resides. I do understand Eugene, being a fragrance “collector” (though some might say “hoarder”) myself. To me, fragrance is more than just a new toy; it’s about memory, emotions, sensations, and experiences. However, I must be reminded about María’s standpoint: in the end, it’s just scented water; and this should not be vital. Anyway... just wanted to comment that this content has had me through four stages of emotion: controversial; enlightening; inspiring; acknowledgement. Thank you for sharing this with us. Abrazos from Puerto Rico. - Dave
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for your feedback. I am glad this video resonates with you.
@Amyleonhardt947
@Amyleonhardt947 5 жыл бұрын
17:10 it was an addiction born out of a genuine enjoyment. I wouldn’t get rid of the ones you want. I have no advice, but thank you both for sharing so openly.
@andiepaige2871
@andiepaige2871 5 жыл бұрын
What a breath of fresh air! I too, have recently acknowledged to myself that I have a fragrance addiction and have let go of those which I do not absolutely adore. I’m down to 20 bottles on ONE shelf. Still a stunning collection and now can focus on making memories with my family. I hope you soon find what works for you! Your wife is lovely and you are lucky to have one so understanding!
@builtfit1291
@builtfit1291 5 жыл бұрын
You were very brave to admit your addiction on this platform. As a recovering addict myself I have to watch my fragrance buying and not let it get out of hand. I do enjoy fragrances and have to limit my buying to only things I really like and only purchase a few bottles a year. Your wife is a caring, intelligent woman, kudos to you both.
@jonkomatsu8192
@jonkomatsu8192 5 жыл бұрын
Happy Birthday Maria! Yup, I have been there. Only at a lower level. Cannot afford too many full bottles, so found myself buying tons of samples and decants. Thousands of dollars worth! Thousands that I really couldn't really afford. Am now much more selective and careful with my spending, and much happier for it. Many thanks to you folks for so willingly and openly discussing this topic. Mahalo!
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you for the birthday wishes!
@MuddyGreenMonster
@MuddyGreenMonster 5 жыл бұрын
Thanks, guys. This was very interesting & informative. Like Eugene, I fully recognise that I have a fragrance addiction & I found this very helpful. Eugene, you're very lucky to have such a understanding, intelligent & beautiful wife. If me & my wife had of made this video the first 5 mins would've started of similar & then the next 20 mins would've just been a full blown fight!
@Greggieboy76
@Greggieboy76 5 жыл бұрын
A brilliant video guys - I think most of us can probably relate!
@TheSmokey1523
@TheSmokey1523 5 жыл бұрын
Great video and topic, I have the same compulsive habits regarding shopping emotionally with a specific emphasis on both food and perfumes. I was also from a very financially disadvantaged background and envious at how others got to eat “exotic” foods in restaurants, new clothes, etc. When I first started making money I aspired to “catch up” with others and make up for my perceived deprived childhood by buying, clothes, music, food, perfume. I felt special and glamorous for buying stuff like this and couldn’t understand how other people can be so boring and mundane as to want to save their money. It actually shocked me when others did not share my enthusiasm for these objects at first. However once you bought these things they were almost never as magical as you wanted them to be and you started getting bored and dissatisfied because ultimately these object are merely things that I held up as symbols in a form of self delusion. This was unhealthy relationship because if I spent the money for it I should get good usage or enjoyment from it. But a lot of food, clothes, perfumes were not used or liked or suited to me because I bought impulsively and didn’t understand my own preferences. After I realized that things are just things my shopping process was less emotional and refined to suit my needs, I was able to actually enjoy my choices a lot more. I think a lot of the compulsion was driven by curiosity and fear that I was missing out on something amazing. As for perfume, it’s okay to keep some that you don’t like at first because someday you can end up liking it since tastes change frequently. Also some cheaper perfumes are fun on days that are casual, it doesn’t always have to be all that serious. I’ve had a collection since teenage years and have purged several times and felt great about it. Also I recently made a Excel file of my collection and put my notes and comments and feelings too, its fun to go back and read because it’s so personal, one day I might self publish this in a book. I have a tab based on perfumes that I want and go test them and strike them off my list with comments. It’s help me become less impulsive and lets me enjoy my existing collection more. Best wishes on your progress.
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for sharing this. I can relate to this on so many levels. I hope you write your book.
@kevinc2301
@kevinc2301 5 жыл бұрын
This just became one of my favorite channels.
@thekevermelho
@thekevermelho 5 жыл бұрын
Really powerful testimony of love, human nature and passion, at many different levels. Thanks you both.
@smellslikejosh2406
@smellslikejosh2406 5 жыл бұрын
I agree with you that keeping your collection and still enjoying the hobby is key. There is a balance that I think can be achieved. The fact you’re having these conversations means you’re on the right track I think. And this really puts me in check myself. I have a history of alcoholism and drug addiction which I have had treatment for and have been sober for years now but it’s clear I have replaced those with the fragrance obsession. Constant;u thinking about it, reading about it, watching, shopping. So this is a huge wake up call for me. Just wanted to say that. But I do still think there’s a healthy way to enjoy all the good aspects to of fragrances.
@sergiom5907
@sergiom5907 5 жыл бұрын
You guys seem to have a great relationship, I love that you both can speak openly and with such vulnerability about your issues and support each other. I think fragrance addiction much more common than we think so I'm glad you put this video out there. I have a pretty small collection myself but I can sense the impulse to dive into this hobby and spend lots of money when things aren't going so well in my life.
@gabmano4877
@gabmano4877 5 жыл бұрын
Very honest, and you're very lucky to have such a great and intelligent(and beautiful) woman with you, I think it's a good start to heal from whatever it is that your addiction is from.
@josecrisostomo2970
@josecrisostomo2970 5 жыл бұрын
This is such an eye opener. I thought it was just me. Hearing Maria discuss perfume addiction smacked me in the head, making me realize that I suffer from it, too. You have a lovely wife and a very understanding one. She’s a treasure!
@RichMitch
@RichMitch 5 жыл бұрын
Its brilliant that u have someone to support and help u and that can do that. A lot of people have family that want to help but dont know how. Community and support are massive parts of recovery
@dorningarts
@dorningarts 5 жыл бұрын
wow, this is a surprising video, very honest, I really appreciate such a frank discussion with your lovely wife.
@ivanmanos8221
@ivanmanos8221 5 жыл бұрын
Eugene you guys are so lucky to have each other
@jean-luc6158
@jean-luc6158 5 жыл бұрын
Obviously you two have a great marriage. To be able to be so honest and to feel that you you can work on things together- that’s not common. This video is very honest and shows your vulnerability with each other. Thank you.
@Jessejrt1
@Jessejrt1 5 жыл бұрын
Kudos to you Eugene (and wife and kids). This took a lot of courage. I wish you (all) success both individually and as a great family. All my best to you bro!
@jeremyhinze8837
@jeremyhinze8837 5 жыл бұрын
Real talk, thank you for putting yourself out there and sharing, your wife sounds very intelligent and also understanding 😃 this should hit home for a great many people watching.
@metalalloy419
@metalalloy419 5 жыл бұрын
Amazing and brave video. I am sure a lot of people can relate to this. Kudos to your wife for being as understanding and supportive during this journey. Happy birthday Maria!
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you!
@markjacoby5607
@markjacoby5607 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you for tackling this topic and sharing your journey with us. Also, I appreciate your honest discussions on the mass marketed crap in circulation. Fragcom is currently oversaturated with sponsored videos and generic lists that original content is refreshing. I’ve been collecting since November but now I realize I’ve been withdrawing from my peers. My favorite aspect about collecting is the research and the hunt to find the fragrance. Recently I’ve experienced anguish from locating DHP in the United States. Now that I’ve found it at the normal price I have no desire to purchase it anymore. An endless cycle for me that I will now seize control over. Thank you again.
@niels9565
@niels9565 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you for being open about this topic. It is a relevant problem for this community to be aware of. I also notice that you are in very loving and supportive relationship which is nice to see.
@Shylade
@Shylade 10 ай бұрын
I’ve had problems with addictions my whole life. Be it love, collecting dolls as a kid or teenager to substances, work, shopping, even obsession with learning new things. I overdue and overthink and over compulsive ruminate about something every moment of my life. Running was the only thing to set me straight where my body set my limits. I don’t know… it’s always be a part of me I just have to work on it every day of my life. Sadly enough.
@StefanFragrance
@StefanFragrance 5 жыл бұрын
One thing I gotta work on for Sure!! Being SUPPORTIVE and spending time with the ones CLOSEST to you!!
@UnknownChap
@UnknownChap 5 жыл бұрын
Something that really needed to be spoken about in the community! Facinating topic and sincerly appreciate you both being so open and honest with everything you decided to share. I know i've caught myself in an almost anxiety attack until i sought out & found a fragrance i want to buy. i didn't even need to buy it 99% of the time. Thankfully i caught that and i'm better at that but it still happens at times 🙏
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
Awareness is the biggest and first step to change. Well done!
@TherapeuticFragrance
@TherapeuticFragrance 5 жыл бұрын
Wasn't expecting this. This is an excellent video, thanks you two for being so open with your lives. This meant a lot. If we could all be this raw and forward what a world it could be.
@cud828
@cud828 5 жыл бұрын
I have to chuckle at the fact that the whole time you are discussing this perfume addiction you are clutching on to a bottle of perfume! What does that mean?!!! Thank you for posting this video and for being forthright about the effect it has on your family. I try to remember that a passion is good (for me). But, as with paintings and other works of art, I don’t need to OWN it to appreciate it. Happy Birthday, Maria!!!!
@enriquevasquez9088
@enriquevasquez9088 5 жыл бұрын
Awesome topic. Glad you talked about as it affects many people. I feel that will all have problems and we try to escape from them. That is when sometimes an addiction begins. It is very important to realize of the problem and to have support of family. Thanks, Eugene.
@gabrycozzolino3044
@gabrycozzolino3044 5 жыл бұрын
Only a strong man can so openly talk about his weaknesses, for when "I am weak then I am strong" St. Paul told us. Thank you for the video.
5 жыл бұрын
Amazing and honest video. Everyone on this community should watch this piece of content. Thanks for sharing it. And happy birthday Maria!
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you for the birthday wishes!
@t_rose
@t_rose 5 жыл бұрын
This is really great to put all your cards on the table and educate people about this addiction because you are definitely not alone. I feel like so many suffer from this and are not facing it maybe because they don’t feel it’s legitimate because it’s not say a drug addiction or gambling like your wife said but all addictions are equally valid and thank you for being open about your experience and trying to face in especially in a KZbin video. Good work
@beefcurtainz69
@beefcurtainz69 5 жыл бұрын
Totally hits very close to home. To make my situation bad too is it’s not JUST perfume unfortunately, it’s spending money on whatever I find interesting at the time and right now it’s buying pocket knives. As soon as I buy the one I love, I go straight back to the internet and automatically start to research and find the new must have, without even enjoying my latest purchase. It’s the chase and needing what I don’t have. Always thinking there is a better version out there that I don’t own yet. I go through these phases constantly and they usually last for about a year or two per item. I would love to see you create a schedule with your family that is your time together and, then have your dedicated separate time for your internet.
@MsBarbara.651
@MsBarbara.651 5 жыл бұрын
Same with me. I've always been a shop a holic. Part of it is the thrill of the chase. Part is the thrill of getting a good deal. Part is rewarding myself. But part is filling a hole, that will never be filled with "things". It's been many different things over the years. But I'll buy more and more until I switch to the new thing. I do love more than just buying perfume though. Smelling scents does help my moods. I love studying and learning about perfumes. I could quit buying perfume (maybe). But it wouldn't be long til I'm buying something else. For me... I always say I'm grateful I'm not addicted to drugs or alcohol. It could be worse!
@beefcurtainz69
@beefcurtainz69 5 жыл бұрын
BettyXO yes it is so much better imo that the addiction is not hard drugs or heavy alcohol drinking. You are right when you say it could be worse. Much worse
@melisaperez1801
@melisaperez1801 5 жыл бұрын
Wow you guys have been a blessing to my life. Not too long ago, I realize that I've been replacing an addiction with another addiction for a long time now. Thank you for confirming and now I will start picturing new habits and hobbies. Thank you Guys again. God bless you
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
Yes, this is quite common. Trust me, you're not alone. My addictions went from food to insane spending on travel, back to food. Then to working out. It was all to escape the pain within. Awareness is the first step in the right direction. I wish you all the success in your journey.
@anas.9155
@anas.9155 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you for sharing this personal experience in which I'm sure that more than one will find themselves reflected. I had the same problem for years and the guilt feeling was eating me alive, until last year when i decided to come clear and stop buying everything whenever i had the urge to feed up my ego. I started to swap, to sell, to buy less, and the most important to be honest with my partner. It wasn't an easy run, but it most certainly worth the change. If i made it, I'm more than sure you can make it as well, especially having the support of the most important people in your life.
@Baz4
@Baz4 5 жыл бұрын
Deep and personal. Very brave of you both for sharing your stories.
@Twasdanight
@Twasdanight 5 жыл бұрын
Great video you two! Eugene what I have done and what I think will work for you is to pick a number and keep your collection within those constraints. For me I picked 100, so if I want a new fragrance, I need to sell one first. It is a great system and forces you to only have fragrances you actually really like. Plus the micro managing of your smaller collection is a hobby in and of itself. So my advice is to pick a number that works for you and that will force you to sell some of the ones you don’t like. Simple easy plan and it works.
@joeribt
@joeribt 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you for sharing this, this is important to all of us. Indeed, when does a hobby become an addiction? I admire the two of you and how open you discuss these issues. Thank you for doing this and thank you for continuing while keeping yourself in check.
@slickadam
@slickadam 5 жыл бұрын
yes, that's true addiction, driven by dopamine, the "chase" pleasure hormone. your therapist shouldn't be surprised. perfume, porn / sex, ... the SAME thing (chemically in your brain = drug).
@pmrp12
@pmrp12 5 жыл бұрын
This was so brave, informative, and helpful to me on a personal level-certain points definitely hit home. Your wife is so incredibly lovely and understanding-reminds me of mine in many ways. You’re so lucky to have each other as you work through these issues. Much luck to you and your family. All the best!
@brianelswick7374
@brianelswick7374 5 жыл бұрын
Thanks for both of your honesty. This was a deep and meaningful video and certainly food for thought. I will say my latest infatuation is with buying decants. I feel like a perfume has to REALLY impress me (compliments from my wife being a big bonus) to become a full bottle purchase.
@Liev.H
@Liev.H 5 жыл бұрын
Can't believe this was almost half an hour, it was THAT engrossing and a masterclass in relationship goals for sure. P.S. Eugen smiling! 😮
@FragrancewithSteve
@FragrancewithSteve 5 жыл бұрын
This is a very sensitive subject. Mainly because as Maria mentioned there’s an addict in most or even all of us. It just comes out differently. I feel addicted to perfume too. And going to the gym, and food. I literally just had a conversation with my wife about this. She wanted to use a sample of a fragrance I want to try. Well not so much sample because in my mind I already know I’m going to buy it at some point as I’ve tried it twice before. So it’s more like holding back the sample to know in my mind I can spray a little of it when I want to before I ever get the full bottle. It’s ridiculous, because I have a few hundreds of bottles and I share them all with her. Why hold back the sample when I have so much other fragrances to spray, right. And often I get new fragrances and forget about them really quick. If I’m really honest I could sell probably half of my collection if not more and still be happy with what I got. But as you probably know it’s difficult parting with an old friend, and going to the hassle of selling it online. I am slowing down my purchases really quick, as we bought a house and need to renovate. I understand it needs sacrifices on my behalf and I would feel bad if we ever fall short on money because of fragrances. I never want to see that happen. Besides as great those high end niches are, you don’t always need them to smell great. A good bottle of Invictus can lift up your mood right?! 🤣 Joking aside, I hope you get your mind set Eugene. Thanks for sharing ✌🏻 And keep bringing us uncompromised fragrance reviews 😊
@scottfulghum7875
@scottfulghum7875 5 жыл бұрын
Eugene and Maria you guys are really a breath of fresh air. I think we're all faced with addiction. It's that door we find wide open and decide to in for better look. So compelling these journeys are behind that door that we forget to come back home. Scent is so powerful. I spent 11 hours yesterday sitting in front of my amplifier playing guitar and spritzing Gerlain Heritage edp into the air around me. That scent is my companoin for solitary creative times. Hell of a great day! Eugene, encouraging to seeing your desire to come back home!
@mheusler
@mheusler 5 жыл бұрын
Believe me this is a healthier addiction than some that I’ve had lol. I kind I’d switched from purchasing perfume to creating my own which is where I think my love of perfume has sort of transferred to.
@F4M05D4V35
@F4M05D4V35 5 жыл бұрын
A healthy addiction is a contradiction.
@mheusler
@mheusler 5 жыл бұрын
Sam G fair point BUT being addicted to perfume is a bit more safe than being addicted to Fentanyl. So maybe that’s the word that I should have used.
@smellslikejosh2406
@smellslikejosh2406 5 жыл бұрын
I feel you man
@fosco3183
@fosco3183 5 жыл бұрын
I totally agree Max, I really got into perfume when I quit smoking cigarettes, and the diversion has helped me big time.
@WeirdCreature
@WeirdCreature 5 жыл бұрын
Mmmm Fentanyl by Max Heusler...oh the smell of it! lol!
@duplomacette
@duplomacette 5 жыл бұрын
Good on you for posting this. I’m in a similar boat but have finally slowed the spending/hoarding train down. I’m not banning purchases but I’ve reduced them greatly and am in the process of organizing and enjoying what I have. I won’t beat myself up making several purchases a year considering I don’t spend much on clothes or going out and I don’t smoke or drink but this hobby can become a slippery slope real fast and addictive behavior can get the best of us.
@taffyj531
@taffyj531 5 жыл бұрын
Love the candor and intelligence in this dialogue. Maria is very inspiring, and she must be an excellent coach. She certainly sparked a desire to examine my own perfume obsession and the acquisition aspect, which has been making me more uncomfortable rather than relaxed and content. Thank you both for the helpful and thoughtful discussion. P.S. I come from a similar background as Maria and totally understand the "full fridge" syndrome.
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for the compliment. I am glad that this video has made you pause and think. P.S. I still struggle in the food area.
@southernsillage3327
@southernsillage3327 5 жыл бұрын
I was an active opiate addict for over a decade which I’ve been clean of for going on seven years now. In the past couple years I’ve definitely noticed a lot of the same compulsive and obsessive traits that I had in my active drug addiction. I’ve just recently started trying to turn it back a little to get it back in check. I definitely think there are many members of this community that suffer from this addiction whether they have realized it yet or not. Great video, who knows there may be Fragrance Anonymous meetings before long.
@southernsillage3327
@southernsillage3327 5 жыл бұрын
I’m afraid the therapist might be right. In my experience with drug and alcohol addiction, you can’t continue to just “meddle” in it. That just never works, every addict will eventually end up back in the same dark place of not worse. I hope I’m wrong because I don’t want to toss my entire collection either.
@seunbejide4475
@seunbejide4475 4 жыл бұрын
Every now and then I find myself coming back to this video because of the incredible insight it’s given me into addiction.
@magic_powers
@magic_powers 5 жыл бұрын
Maybe put her in charge of all the finances? Keep online usage to 1 hour per day? Best of luck. She is a keeper and perfumes come and go.
@ScentedMoments
@ScentedMoments 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for sharing this video! Everyone should see it! Loved the topic, the brutal honesty and especially the courage to face and share your addictions with each other. Happy Birthday Maria! 😊
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you!
@arnold1446
@arnold1446 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you for sharing, Eugen, and for your candor, and thank you Maria, for your insight. We wish you and your family well!
@vetiverfreak1890
@vetiverfreak1890 5 жыл бұрын
Great video. I like your chanel because you're honest. Funny: my wife is social worker and when we met she thought I am an OK guy - I did'nt drink or used drugs. Soon she knew that I'm not drinking because of alcohol addiction but years go by, I'm stil sober and that's good. But in reality alcohol addiction was only changed by perfume addiction, which is less evil I guess, cause I hope I can manage it easier. We'll see. Thanks for the video!
@kenzschueler
@kenzschueler 5 жыл бұрын
This is a great conversation. I'm glad it has been brought to light. I have been doing much better. I am newer to the community. But when I started collecting, I jumped in way to fast. I have backed off, yet still collect. My goals going forward 1. Only buy one fragrance a month within a certain dollar range 2. If the fragrance(s) I am looking for is under projected budget, and I have money left over to buy another and not go over budget. I'll buy it. 3. If I dont love it, I dont buy it I dont go off of compliments, if I don't love it, why wear it? I enjoyed this video, thanks guys for your testimonies
@RyzFragz34
@RyzFragz34 5 жыл бұрын
This was amazing guys. Such great points. Thank you for sharing:)
@cmx3063
@cmx3063 5 жыл бұрын
Wow I looooove her 😍 (I'm gay so.. not like that), so empathetic. Congrats Eugen for having her in your team. Thanks to both for willing to be so open and authentic, and thus relatable, it can indeed become addictive and some don't even recognize it or opt for denial. This took guts. 👏 Oh yeah and feliz cumpleaños.🥳
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
Thanks for the birthday wishes!
@smithpatricemary
@smithpatricemary 5 жыл бұрын
This really resonated with me, I cant go into specifics here. Great video to share and to help many others who are going through the same thing. It puts it all in perspective. :)
@GoodDaySir
@GoodDaySir 5 жыл бұрын
Great video. I don't think I am fully in addiction phase myself (then again what addict ever admits that in the throes of it) but I am actively cutting back on purchases. I think for me its more of a case of what more can I buy? I have great frags in every category now....but it's cost some money to get there that's for sure. Nothing I can't afford but still. Good on you for facing it, and for putting it on film to help others. Your wife is a smart and beautiful woman and very supportive, you are very lucky to have her help you with this.
@koarrowfield6364
@koarrowfield6364 3 жыл бұрын
I adore you even more now after watching this video! Your wife Maria is such an amazing woman, beautiful, intelligent, matured, and most importantly she has a great sense of humor! Thank you for sharing this video with us, I am officially addicted to your channel! Cheers!
@robertperricone5848
@robertperricone5848 5 жыл бұрын
Im glad you have brought this up..I have noticed the past few reviews as "we" talked about recently that they were angry/terse etc...I knew you were coming forward w/some new thoughts. I had mentioned that I have given up on frags for a bit now..I want to use what i have and enjoy them. Sometimes "re visiting" them is just good..we find new or even familiar things about them that made us purchase them to begin with. Maybe you could go on a revisit journey w/us...that way you can still make your videos and we can appreciate your thoughts as well. I have been over the past months been thinking that your concern w/"overbuying" is a huge concern of spouses of many reviewers too.. Most of the people that i see here are i would from what i can surmise are middle class people who IMO spend way too much money on fragrances and probably have mis allocated funds from the "household" or even their own budgets............There are"guys" here who have hundreds of fragrances and how can that NOT make a dent on funding...........so...Thanks Eugene and Maria for your video exposing a situation in which i think many people fall prey to.............Sending much support..Bob
@jamesbroadfoot5269
@jamesbroadfoot5269 5 жыл бұрын
Great video guys... thank you for being so honest. Eugene, maybe it’s time to do a 20 fragrances for life video and dump/sell the rest? 😬 Have you done a video like that? I’d be curious to see which 20 you’d choose if you HAD to trim your collection.
@anatolysdreamtheperfumebab9299
@anatolysdreamtheperfumebab9299 5 жыл бұрын
Great idea, start with a 20, 50, choose a number, for life. Name the ones you love most, couldn't live without. Just that, no trimming.
@will_9329
@will_9329 5 жыл бұрын
An incredibly insightful video. I Really appreciate this personal conversation as a tool for us in the community to use and help us with our own addiction. Really good stuff
@vangvieng1
@vangvieng1 5 жыл бұрын
Really wonderful.. Thank you so much. 5 years ago my life hit the skids.. Lost 36 kgs in 9 months from starvation. Twice went 10 days without food. Twice 8 days. Now 5 years later I am still compulsively shopping for food every day. Often food that I don't need... Now have just started collecting perfume.. Oh my Buddha.. But I am sure that having watched this will be a big help. Bless you both.
@gail3633
@gail3633 5 жыл бұрын
I respect and appreciate the honesty of both you and Maria. I would be interested in hearing how you navigate through this, to where you are content with your collection, spending amount, work schedule etc, I'm sure this will help so many. Happy birthday to beautiful Maria💜
@rrm1903
@rrm1903 5 жыл бұрын
I've spent thousands yearly through years on perfumes, although as hobby its up there as a priority but in my general time and budget management it stays a transparent part of my routine, I also am a audiophile and a biker and leather fashion collector and have tons of unnecessary spare gear for my profession (I'm a tattoo artist). but I still keep an schedule that prioritizes my job and love life, even my music, gym and social life, I think thats the trick to not let hobbies turn into obsession or worse, your life.
@scent007
@scent007 5 жыл бұрын
I tackled various types of friendly addictions and still do the one thing I constantly try to balance is my addiction to shopping (either food, clothes, perfumes or even gifts -yes I used to buy gifts for others excessively just because it made feel good.. I went through a journey of understanding why each addiction happens and why every while something new comes up that I have to work on it all over again and understand where is the key to balance it then move on. I can totally relate, and the good news is that when you know how to balance this kind of habits/addictions you will still enjoy doing it but with moderation, and you will somehow get that from those close to you.. One last thing, you have a gem of a wife .. Such a strong, wise and supportive woman.
@EricJohnson-vi6ri
@EricJohnson-vi6ri 5 жыл бұрын
Great video. I wonder if many of the reviewers on youtube and across the forums are in the same situation. I oftentimes think this when I see reviewers talk about a fragrance and have a full bottle in their possession every time.
@HarmandeepMuker
@HarmandeepMuker 5 жыл бұрын
Wicked video brother. Really hit home this time. I've started slowing down as of new year. And Happy Birthday Maria, you are a good woman to be standing by him. ✌️
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you for the birthday wishes!
@dwpolicelli1
@dwpolicelli1 5 жыл бұрын
Great video. This struggle is real and I can completely relate. Best of luck on your journey. I hope you will make more videos like this. It’s a needed topic.
@BobbyDior
@BobbyDior 5 жыл бұрын
We are with you, Big E ! It brings me joy to give away or sell lots of my frags to all the guys and gals in my life, and I'm not on ANY social media, by choice...I end up selling off at a great loss and I'm still happy I gave something good to a friend. And what with the peeps who have a thousand bottles of wine in their cellar?...So, what!..same thing right. Anyway, start to de-escalate the situation, and take in some fun as you do it...Keep the special, rare juice to pass down to the boys, or sell them off to pay for university, lol!
@AndresPerfumeMan
@AndresPerfumeMan 5 жыл бұрын
Wow man this is more than interesting, thanks for sharing such a personal experience
@MrFranplan
@MrFranplan 5 жыл бұрын
Heyy you look like a chileno man 😀
@nfltrrrqwsa7512
@nfltrrrqwsa7512 9 ай бұрын
He’s doing great. Just 6 more cabinets and a re-purposed wine cooler since then
@Slakhane
@Slakhane 5 жыл бұрын
Thanks for sharing, gave me few things to think about. You are a great couple!
@arapaimagold8088
@arapaimagold8088 5 жыл бұрын
You can start from buying travel size or minis instead of a full bottle. That way you still get original bottle and label, a satisfaction that we can’t get from decant.
@compassionplease7380
@compassionplease7380 5 жыл бұрын
This is a remarkable video. I think I can sense the love you have for one another. You both are being very honest and forthright, here. I respect that, very much. I wish you both the best. Addiction can seem like freedom but it’s really a prison.
@dayvidgee8767
@dayvidgee8767 5 жыл бұрын
Thanks for the video and i'd feel a little guilty now of indulging in your addiction if I watched your other videos - even though I am an addict myself. As i'm sure you are aware, you are very lucky to have such an intelligent and supportive wife, and I hope together you can make the addiction a little less effective on your life. Good luck and I look forward to an update in the near future as to how it is all going.
@bloodrivercanyon
@bloodrivercanyon 5 жыл бұрын
You should have your wife with you more often. I didn't know you knew how to smile. It looks good on you.
@Superinky
@Superinky 5 жыл бұрын
Eugene, thank you for your honest video. I've been thinking about it all day.
@NashNaosh
@NashNaosh 3 жыл бұрын
I found you while looking for reviews on Chanel Les Exclusifs and wow this is deep! Great insight into an issue that many frag reviewers and viewers may be in denial of, don’t even know is an addiction or even don’t know how to deal with it yet in all these cases it’s be negatively affecting their lives whether relationships, finances, physical or emotional wellbeing
@walid7885
@walid7885 3 жыл бұрын
So happy that I saw this. I went through RAD, SAD and FAD. Respectively "Razor acquisition disorder", "Soap acquisition disorder" and "Fragrance acquisition disorder". Am at the end of FAD now. It just hit me when I saw today a video mentioning the death of Carlos from Brooklyn fragrance lovers. I saw a video of him next to his collection of bottles full at 99%. The whole collection is worth around 100k. Fragrance lovers never finish their fragrances or if they do it's just one bottle and they actually continue rebuying the same one. So where do these bottles go now? He left them behind and he sadly needed a go fund me for his funerals. This was eye-opening.
@amnaaziz3840
@amnaaziz3840 5 жыл бұрын
Dear Maria and Eugene. A really interesting and intriguing topic that all perfume fiends can relate to. I agree we all have some kind of addiction some people admit to it whilst others are in denial. Cheers
@Curdle7
@Curdle7 5 жыл бұрын
I could see some ideas firing off in Eugene’s mind when Maria mentioned “if you want to do this full time make a living on it great I’m there with you” hahah hey not a bad idea
@youngmc5040
@youngmc5040 5 жыл бұрын
Big thumbs up for this video! I think we have all done something like ship a frag to work or we are on our phones WAY to much! The only way I get around it is I am a catch n release type of fraghead! That is the only way to keep the collection small! They part my wife get pissed about is splitting all the frags. That shit takes time. I thought about stopping it because I think about it something and it really isn’t worth it. The only reason for doing it is to get money for the next frag or “high”. They you have the ungrateful SOB that get pissed because you didn’t ship the next day! Nice work! This hits home for a lot of fragheads out there I am sure! - Mychal
@jordanlouie_
@jordanlouie_ 5 жыл бұрын
This video has a ton of helpful insight. Had to favorite this video to watch for later.
@gunmetal2445
@gunmetal2445 5 жыл бұрын
So much courage!
@RichMitch
@RichMitch 5 жыл бұрын
*cologne 🤣🤣
@lindastevens6926
@lindastevens6926 4 жыл бұрын
Thanks for keeping this up Eugene. I hope that you are doing well as can be. The more I watch your videos the more I actually care about you and your well being. I went from being a drug addict to an alcoholic to collecting perfumes. I just wanted to say thank you for your channel and time.😊
@dennisdarnell1953
@dennisdarnell1953 5 жыл бұрын
OMG,Its official i have a problem with buying frags also,Ive been in recovery for another addiction for 45 years,I guess i might bring this topic up in my weekly group session...people are gonna laugh but so be it! Thanks for airing your laundry,listen to your wife,I did!!
@ninyli1
@ninyli1 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you for sharing, Maria and Eugen! This topic affects many youtubers.
@007peter
@007peter 5 жыл бұрын
Thanks You for making this HONEST video about Fragrance Addiction. It's a serious problem that FragCom try to ignore. People even go → Debt over it.
@IO-hg7oe
@IO-hg7oe 5 жыл бұрын
This video really hit home for me. Not only do I feel I have a fragrance addiction but I also had an alcoholic parent. This question is for Maria - Do you know anyone who has gone to Adult Children of Alcoholics meetings and what methods have you used to cope?
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
Hey! I have had two clients that had alcoholic parents. I myself had the same experience. In my own personal experience, I went to therapy for about seven years. I had a lot to process and work through. I think everyone could benefit from therapy at some point in their life. I feel it comes down to whether you feel your experiences are impacting you in a negative way in the present moment.
@razscott
@razscott 5 жыл бұрын
Very interesting and well done, you have a diamond there man, thank you.
@SamuelGustav
@SamuelGustav 5 жыл бұрын
Amazing video, and very courageous of you to admit you have an addiction, i do think, more or less we all have addictions, it all depends how we act on it etc, what Maria said is true, we need to face what triggers such behavior. You have an amazing wife Eugene :)
@DaretoHealWithin
@DaretoHealWithin 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you for your feedback. I truly believe that we all come face to face with habits that perhaps are not the best and/or maybe become addicted to because of how it makes us feel. I am definitely not perfect. As I mentioned I had a food addiction for a very long time. Once I was able to see that food was a sore spot for me, I was able to deal with it. It has made me very self-aware. When I start to notice habits/behaviors that are steering me in the wrong direction, I am able to pivot.
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