Watch this when I die.

….
To whom it may concern,
It’s been a challenge writing this one. What I am seeking to describe can never be fully captured in words.
Still, is there anything more human than to wonder, to reach out, to seek to understand?
The way I see it, we begin life close to God, to the universe and to all things. Which is of course, 3 ways to say the same thing. And there are many more. The Sufi’s call it The Beloved. Jewish mystics refer to it as Ein Sof, meaning no end, no limit.
I believe there is a great connectedness to this world we find ourselves in and of, and yet, slowly, we grow up and fall fo r the idea that we’re all separate and isolated. I’ve fallen for this idea The grand illusion is that we think we’re finding our way by building up our identities, our accomplishments, our empires, but really we grow blind to what we are and where we come from.
I want to see clearly. I want to see beyond this illusion. I want to wake up. I need to remember that I’m not separate from the world around me. I can see that the things that I cling to, the things I want to own, own me. They blind me. I must surrender to all that I am terrified by. Freedom comes from letting go. That’s is. It sounds simple, because it is simple. Even so, I’m coming to realize that letting go of everything that I know about myself is perhaps the most terrifying thing I can seek to do.
Still, I find myself doing what I can to peel away the layers. Tearing off my armor, every last one of the walls must come down. It will take me a while, but eventually, I will go home. Maybe when I can see clearly, I’ll see that I am already home.
I have to remind myself that in the moments that I feel lost, I’m not actually lost, that’s just a thought. I can’t get lost if truly I am made of the same stuff as the stars above me and the dirt beneath me.
Nothing real can be lost.
I’ve come to learn that beyond every fear is a new discovery I will make about myself. I let the things that scare me be my sign posts, telling me where I must go next. What a gift, to be able to keep learning about myself.
And so I find myself in conversation with fear. It is not a conversation to be had with the mind, but with the heart. If fear is the tunnel, than my heart is the torch, the lantern, illuminating just enough for me to take my next steps.
When I am acting with my heart, I can say to fear: “Hello my dear friend, I see you. My mind tells me to hate you, to destroy but my heart tells me to be curious about you, to move towards you. I want to get to know you better because you teach me so much about me.”
Living this way is a simple recipe for a very rich life. I must say, I highly recommend it.
The heart doesn’t think, it isn’t strategic. It just experiences. All that counts is that I don’t protect my heart, because the heart is not for protecting.
So knock me down and break my heart a thousand times and give me a full serving of everything that comes with being human and I’ll thank you every single time because at least I am alive and feeling and learning. Learning to take off the armor. I am on my way back home.

[@mandelbro1]

“I can’t get lost if truly I am made of the same stuff as the stars above me and the dirt beneath me” ❤

[@kcjean9883]

This one in particular 🥰🫶

[@milena7646]

This sentence also really touched me, can't describe this feeling 🥺😍 Thank you Nathaniel, it was what I needed right now 🤍

[@learnlanguages1259]

Nothing real can't be lost...

[@DuongPham-kz8so]

Probably most people in Western havent heard about, but that thought really close to the idea of "The Five Aggregates" in Buddhism.

[@dylr7883]

Had this exact thought the other day. Weird to see it come up online. It was very personal for me, at the end of a long journey of stuff. But I guess we really are all made of the same stuff so why am I surprised? peace

[@johnl6371]

“You are not separate from the whole. You are one with the sun, the earth, the air. You don’t have a life. You are life.” ― Eckhart Tolle

[@mahamkhan2247]

This reminds me of the saying that we are, each of us, the Universe experiencing itself. It's such a beautiful concept, so simple yet so powerful.

[@asdfghjk8876]

Reminds me of the quote "you aren’t born into this world, you’re born out of it"

[@burngg1665]

I have been silently watching this mans youtube channel since 2020 and to say he is a great writer or filmmaker or philosopher is an understatement. Nathaniel, your work is beautiful. Your work ties perfectly in with your ideas as if we get a glimpse of your own thoughts, fully understanding your intents and memories. Your work is beautifully unique

[@normallyautistic50]

I was about to write a very similar comment. What a privilege to witness such a remarkable human being growth

[@robertcalamusso1603]

Lol You must have a very limited life

[@Ilovethefootball24]

"Knowing that you will die gives you the courage to do everything in life" Steve Jobs.

[@anonymous-jp7bo]

in what way you guys talking about?

[@DynastyTrickDogs]

Nice quote

[@DynastyTrickDogs]

@@anonymous-jp7bo The quote is describing that you only get one life, so if you don't do it while you're alive you never will and therefore will have intrinsic motivation to go and do what it is.

[@anonymous-jp7bo]

@@DynastyTrickDogs ok looking forward to what life has to offer for me🙏🌍

[@davidsousa7176]

Romans 3:23-25 For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and all are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus. God presented Christ as a sacrifice of atonement, through the shedding of his blood-to be received by faith.

[@madhouse8301]

”I have to remind myself that in the moments I feel lost, I’m not actually lost. That’s just a thought. I can’t get lost if truly I am made of the same stuff as the stars above me and the dirt beneath me. Nothing real can be lost.” Nathaniel, you are a poet ❤️

[@kloehjohnson]

„The heart is not for protecting, so knock me down and break my heart a thousand times and give me a full serving of everything that comes with beeing human and I’ll thank you every single time because at least I‘m alive and feeling and learning.“ This had me smile-crying!

[@timgregory448]

We think we are separate but we are not. You got it bro . Go beyond, that's where love is.

[@drewjamespatrick4054]

After just losing my father....This message has me crying like a baby! It is also a beautiful reminder note to express and write my own. A preface to a love letter and life well-lived, though pain has been my constant! Thank you Nathaniel!

[@dinokostas8901]

Nathaniel, this is one of the most inspirational videos I’ve seen in a long time. Sadly so many of us run around defining ourselves by what we have or who we “used to be” that we forget to take notice of everything around us, including the preciousness of the moment. I feel so fortunate to work in a field (psychology) that enables me to connect with people at such a fundamental level; but admittedly, there are times that I get caught up in the collective crisis of human self definition. Thanks for the reminder that it can be much simpler than we make it out to be.

[@sickedude4life]

How lucky I am to exist in sync right next to you, being able to witness how you see the world and what you make from it! Forever grateful to be your friend 🙏🏼❤‍🔥

[@coreybennettboardman]

It's amazing how a video like this can find you at the exact right time. Thank you for having the courage to explore and share this. Thank you Nathaniel.✨

[@iamrjdennis]

A beautiful film, Nathan. Much love to you, my friend! 🙌🏻

[@hajnihercz]

"So knock me down and break my heart a thousand times and give me a full serving of everything that comes with being human and I’ll thank you every single time because at least I am alive and feeling and learning." Oh, life is so heart-wrenchingly bittersweet and I am so much in love with all of it. Beautiful words, Nathaniel.

[@lorenzo.ramani]

I don‘t know if it makes any sense, but this one really reminded me of the „old“ Nathaniel. Maybe the more things change, the more they truly stay the same. (:

[@RenzoMaano]

The most beautiful thing I've heard in a while. This feels very emotional yet stoic at the same time.

[@rebeccabaradas7699]

Jesus said this in Luke 9:24: “For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake, he is the one who will save it.” ‭‭Luke‬ ‭9‬:‭24‬ ‭NASB1995‬‬ This happened to me but now I found the real Life in a personal relationship with Jesus! Thank you for sharing your stories Nathan! ❤️🙏

[@Thisismehdii]

God knows how much I needed to hear these words! All the things that you've said are echoing in my mind, playing my life before my eyes like a movie, and I see myself moving towards something..endless. "I'm on my way back home." It shakes my entire being! Reminds me of the fact that it's such an honor to be the great character of this story, this journey, and like Sir Walter Raleigh once said, " This comedy!" Thank you so much for creating this video. I truly enjoyed the videography and the philosophical messages that you have delivered. Sending you love and wishing you the bests.

[@shaminasenaratne3615]

A masterpiece @nathanieldrew . I think of the young man I first came upon by accident here, during the pandemic. How you push the boundaries of your life, seeking understanding, value, growth, satisfaction. And in a few short years you produce this beautifully written, shot and edited film essay, distinctly you. May you live long, but in the meantime, thank you for your dying words. We are connected. To so many we may never have known, have known us ☺️

[@laurakirkpatrick7911]

This is insanely beautiful. You have a gift with art and a work ethic like no other ❤

[@DynastyTrickDogs]

This is beautiful! So inspiring, Nathaniel!

[@seaofsolace]

So beautiful! Beautifully written, beautifully shot. ❤

[@benowa]

Nathaniel! I’m so glad you shared this, thank you from the bottom of my heart! This represents exactly what I’ve been thinking and living these past few months, and I’m so grateful that you decided to share this with everyone!

[@lore_watson]

Follow the fear ♥ What a beautiful piece of art, Nathaniel!

[@stephwaggg]

Your ability to tell stories and evoke emotions is unmatched. Thank you for having the courage to share your voice and your art with us all. Bless you

[@WaNoJudo]

Might be one of the best videos I've ever seen ! Thank you for putting the work and the suffuring into those words and feelings ! Means a lot to young and lost people like me ! Stay well ! ❤❤

[@kcjean9883]

That was an unexpected 4 minutes of tears lazily traipsing down my cheeks. Gorgeous views, thought provoking words, and just an all-around beautiful video. I dont know why it just randomly showed up on my feed but i think the all of everything wanted me to see it. And i believe it was meant for me to see. Wonderful work Nathaniel. I hope to see more and surely look forward to it 🥰

[@rosaellie5064]

Cried through this whole thing, your videos/content just keep getting better and better. So profound and moving, thank you.

[@grabowskycountry]

A heartfelt tribute to yourself Nathaniel with lessons we need to realize before we go. I’m an old gal that loves to see the youth non-fearful of exploring their lives. Gives my soul a reminder to know all are not lost, they are experiencing the scenic drive.

[@14GlitterDoll]

I was definitely feeling lost and diminished today but this really was the medicine I needed. Thank you Nathan

[@mtts7]

Goosebumps and tears in my eyes. Truly one of the best videos you’ve made so far ❤

[@lisha4152]

I can't even begin to describe the depth of this video. Truly, a piece of art. Thank you, Nathaniel! Thank you so much for a reminder of what's truly, life. ♥

[@lagomholly]

Your storytelling is just exquisite. I get lost in your videos. Thank you for always providing such thought-provoking and emotional content Nathaniel.

[@BenjiLewisMusic]

Wow. Thank you. Yes to following your heart, to keeping it open and experiencing everything that comes with being human YES ! Beautiful and what a powerful reminder

[@atharvadeuskar]

It's been a while since I have commented on any KZbin video and watching this has me made my hands type. Thank you so much for such a profound creation!

[@francoveritas2]

By far the best way to describe your journey throughout KZbin is this amazing video! Deep, unapologetic, genuinely real just like you are!

[@Megg028]

Nathaniel, those lines touched my on a deep level and resonated with me to take those steps I have been avoiding to take. Thank you so much

[@mairapl]

Your words brought tears to my eyes, these tears had the taste of redemption & joy. Life is just so beautiful. What you and your team are doing with these videos is a generous gift to every human out there. After watching this my heart, spirit and soul feel even more grounded and luminous. It is truly a unique feeling, realising the existence of unity.

[@feliciadelina]

Watching this just now helped me come to a realization in my life. Something I've been resisting for so long suddenly became so clear. And it feels like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders and my heart. Thank you for this x

[@dariadova]

Watching this after meditation was incredibly beautiful. Thank you Nathaniel for sharing your art.

[@emmacheung2411]

I can always learn something in Nathaniel's video. Thank you Nate for the good work. ❤

[@itsmarionfink]

This one is the most beautiful piece of art I have seen in a long time! Thank you 🙏✨💜

[@Deliciouslyvibrant]

One of my fav videos of yours Nathaniel; gosh you’re so talented and I needed to hear all this. Meeerci! ❤

[@TrueSilvo]

What an inspiration to carry on living the best life! Thanks Nathaniel, this is truly exceptional!

[@pkpmendez3]

It has been a long time since anything has spoken to me like this video. Thank you for the powerful impact this has made on me. May others be touched and positively impacted as I have.

[@adream2inspire]

This was just brilliant. I don’t have the words to describe how I’m feeling. But I’ll just say I’m in tears, I am deeply inspired, and I feel like I have to process all I’ve just seen and heard. Thank you!

[@SusannahPerri]

What a beautiful, film and message, thank you!❤

[@justferdiaz]

Oh, my. I'm crying so hard. Thank you so much for sharing. You are certainly an inspiration to me. I am fortunate to feel that every time I feel lost and watch one of your videos, I come back to me. I have a deep admiration for what you do and most of all how you do it. Again. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

[@kmiknik4861]

This. This. This. Like a prayer I'll watch it over and over. Beautifully done.

[@sherrieshatzen3801]

I don't know if I have ever seen a more beautiful piece of work. You are inspiring. You speak absolute truth. You stand with all seekers.

[@Summer-Vibes]

This touched my soul Nathaniel and it made me cry!!! I have no words but simply want to say thank you for living & sharing your human experience!!!

[@majopacheco3100]

I think this is my favorite film from you so far... AMAZING! Deep, touching and authentic. Thank you for this 🤍

[@UnfurlWithYu]

This is such a love letter to life and to oneself 😭thank you for this beautiful piece of reminder and poem 🤍

[@supermario1006]

I love this guy sooo much and he has no idea how much he inspires me.. keep being you Nathaniel❤❤

[@ricardoferreira8793]

That was not only beautiful, but meaningful as well… Would love to see more poetic productions like this! Thank you, keep it up! 👏🏼

[@SabolaCool]

I was hiking through a cold forest, and wished to go home when my body started hurting and getting too cold. At one point, I suddenly started thinking, or more so understanding that the pain and cold I was feeling, that seemed so unpleasant, with a soft shift of a mindset started feeling pleasurable. In that very moment I began to feel so appreciative of the pain and the cold, because I was feeling something, I was alive. At that point I realized how the mindset I had moments before made me feel bad about the hike, but through the pain and cold with a shift of mindset I enjoyed every second of the hike till the end. It is so easy to shift your own mindset, so easy I couldn’t even believe it, and the result could touch the soul, or even be physical. your mind is so strong you just need to realize it within yourself.

[@amanda-clairebennett6132]

I have watched a number of your videos over the years and I must confess I agree with a lot of what you say. I think you are an extremely intelligent, thought-provoking person. I like your videos very much and I think you are a talented film maker, thanks for the upload from Perth, WA.

[@petermoulding4578]

You got me, Nathaniel. That was beautiful

[@PowerOfAIandMotivation]

The videos are beautiful and your thoughts captured the real truth of spirituality of truly just waking up, tearing down the armor, leading through the heart and sharing. Thank you Nathaniel

[@ToadSage24]

This resonated with me on a level I can't fully comprehend. I don't know why you showed up on my KZbin feed but, I am glad you did. I needed this right now, more than you know.

[@kingsleykwesimensah]

You're doing great Nath. Every video you make comes with a unique realization that goes a long way to help me live my life. Today, you have helped me confirm how important it is not to disconnect myself from my environment all in the name of achieving or obtaining something that has been made to look like an isolated or personal goal or journey. Thanks so much. I'm a CAD and Research Engineer and I'd love to get a video on relationship dynamics with team members and how not to be the only person who always wants to get the glory when a project succeeds. I believe many people can relate as well. Thanks.

[@bethanyryan404]

Life has broken my heart in so many ways. And after every painful or crushing blow I see things so much more clearly. Beautiful film and beautifully written!

[@karifishc3376]

wrapped this up 3 times. I cried. too beautiful.and profundly thank you.

[@JeyFlowzy]

This is absolutely breathtaking 💕🙌🏽🤌🏽 thank you so much for sharing.

[@lcdemack]

This is Beautiful. Not really what I was expecting, it's not even written in the past tense, and not really a list of things you've learned, but what you're striving for today. I love that you wear your great sense of wonder at and about the world and those emotions on your sleeve, making no apologies or excuses for them, but instead even championing this amazing heartfelt human thing. Thank you for your KZbin content and keep on keeping on. It's wonderful. 💚

[@user-hn5em2zs9r]

You honestly made me cry, I felt it deep

[@yvonnebirch6026]

I love listening to you. Thank you ! 🙏💕🌷

[@anjelikapernstich]

This is beautiful and so needed! Thank you, Nathaniel.

[@mmvilar]

Nathan, thank you! The right video at the right time changes everything sometimes 💛

[@Anastasiiia_an]

This spoke straight to my heart 💜 What a beautiful piece this is! What a strange, marvelous journey of human existence connected those two unlikely dots of experience from the opposite sites of the globe in expressing and understanding this intention of the heart. Nothing real can be threatened, nothing unreal exists.

[@alaenke]

I must say this is my favorite of all of your videos. It sums up so much. And I agree - Fear is my friend.

[@Jason_Polkovitz]

How lovely. Thank you. I’ve been needing these kinds of reminders lately.

[@lacthetomato]

Infinite love, love that song sm, it makes me feel the exact words you say, the wholesome way humanity can be felt

[@Terra.Angelova]

Woaaaaah! That is my favourite videos of yours. Thank you for diving even deeper. Such a beautiful expression of something that can not be expressed.

[@raynoladominguez4730]

The connectedness of us all, the strands that compose the sacredness of our true selves. Thanks for this message.

[@Waryfuls]

*"It's sounds simple, because it is simple"* amen

[@cecilia9364]

This is a masterpiece! So beautiful that words can’t express the emotion.

[@savvatsek]

what you seek, is seeking you. nice work brother

[@andreaps8966]

What an amazing video Nathaniel, one of my favorites. Thank U for sharing this beautiful words with Us. ❤

[@markoivankovic190]

Great video! I encourage you to keep making this kind of videos. I love how it allows your poetic side to shine through and deeply connect to viewers. I wish I could meet people like you more often in real life.

[@poli7997]

this is absolutely…. captivating. as everything that Nathaniel does, really. i always have some sort of revelation when watching your stuff, thank you man ❤️

[@nickfranco7977]

You should guard your heart Nathaniel, everything you do flows from it... like this beautiful video!

[@bbacalhau]

What a masterpiece man! Absolutely loved it!

[@saratoltec92]

This one is by far the best video you’ve made( in my opinion). I relate to it ❤

[@theyellowsparks]

Thank you, I really needed this today.

[@emil.petrov]

Hello, from Bulgaria Nathan! 🤍 Thank you for the inspiration, as always! Amazing storytelling skills! Best of luck! 🍀

[@jadahunt2016]

Hearing my own thoughts verbalized through someone else I dont even know is proof of the divine. Absolutely beautiful piece of work that provides comfort and belonging in the grand scheme of human existence.

[@jehamburg3110]

How absolutely wonderful is that! Thanks, Nathaniel!

[@santiagovruiz]

Ver y constatar tu progreso es tan hermoso. Gracias por seguir ❤

[@mario8833]

Beautiful. I really struggle with anxiety and angst so this video unsettled me but probably in a positive way, reminding me to experience things and being in the present. Even though I don't share the exact same thoughts of this video I can recognize its value❤

[@r0bert_v]

The deep thiking, with the storytelling, with the filiming, with the music... What a materpiece Nathan.

[@zonnestraaltje_g]

Nathaniel, I love the way your mind thinks, the way you express yourself with words and video/art. ❤I would love to know you in person, you are inspiring to me!💥

[@zomchakk.]

You've changed and grown in a such good and unexpected way. Glad to observe your life journey!

[@avefenixyt2405]

Bro It was the most beautyfull video that I ever seen in my Life. I Will keep this video for ever because you've just make me wake Up and open my mind. It fell like a rebirth and I'm gratefull . Thank you

[@Howtogetfluent]

Beautiful and profound. A stand out film among your so many wonderful ones. Thank you!

[@Laurelyli]

this really touched my soul. thanks for the reminder.

[@freyaveris]

Wow, so beautifully said and captured. Thank you. Made my day. 💚🌿

[@DigitalEngine]

Love it. You're a great poet.

[@TheAlliGShow]

This is so beautiful! The message, the imagery, the music.. Bravo!

[@isabellemarques3625]

this is so beautiful and sensitive. I've watched so many times

[@abigailmedina8743]

Que bello mensaje, que hermosa edición!!!! El mensaje me dejo sin palabras ❤