Weaponized Incompetence on TikTok is a NIGHTMARE

if you’re in a relationship and you deal with this, oh baby RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN..
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[@SophieM-n2d]

Boyfriend once washed the dishes terribly. Like dried food stuck to the silverware and plates. So I served him dinner on the dirty dishes, and he never tried to pull that shit again.

[@uglyrobot1975]

That’s what I was thinking. If my boyfriend wiped up the ketchup on the counter like that, I’d demand his arm. I’d put a little bit of ketchup. And I’d clean it up alllll over his arm just like he did. What do you mean? This is how you clean.

[@ButtersDefender]

I helped my BF Clean once and the next day it was an absolute mess again. So I told him how tf to clean it and made him do it himself without my help. He was more conscious about keeping stuff clean. I then broke up with him a month after cause he was a man child.

[@RamonaGelosi]

slay

[@jadecoolness101]

@@uglyrobot1975 If I have to soft parent him like that it's over. The fact you're almost bragging about this online.... Women's standards are in hell.

[@JNellyBoi]

My roommate STILL does this after years of living with him, I point it out to him and he kinda just shrugs. So now I just need to avoid his dishes like a landmine...

[@wooshydog]

They have the nerve to say that they're leaders but then act like idiots to get out of things like children

[@kilee2568]

exactly, and how can we trust them to lead when they seemingly don't know how to put leftover food in a ziplock bag ffs🙄

[@Krispykreme15]

I love your sans pfp

[@wooshydog]

@@Krispykreme15 EYYY CHARA

[@purpleflowers8723]

FACTSS

[@YoYo-AndCookie]

I LOVE YOUR PFP BRO

[@frenchiethetoucan]

It’s always crazy to me that some grown adults won’t complete basic necessities

[@chasehedges6775]

👍💯

[@chasehedges6775]

Are people going insane?

[@Kits_A_Star]

Seriously. We all make mistakes, sure, but an adult should be able to take care of themselves.

[@DeliciousBoi]

My mother in a nutshell.

[@BlueSourcandy]

Literally!!

[@reinahachem8091]

i dont understand how someone could think "oh yeah, lemme act like an idiot to get away with stuff" ??!!

[@thecozyconstellation]

male entitlement. mind boggling.

[@tatiana4050]

And then think women will still want them if they act like a toddler.

[@Melissa-sx9vh]

A while ago I saw a Reddit post by a man who just had a baby with his wife and he was asking other men how to never have to do anything to help because he didn't want to change his routine now that they had a baby and the men were all telling him to do things very badly/dumbly (basically giving him the 101 on weaponized incompetence) so that after the second or third time his wife wouldn't ask him to do anything ever again. It was sickening seeing them congratulating each other as if they had found a loophole and not a way to make their wives hate them...

[@sweariefaerie9621]

I've seen it in realtime. My stepdad "can't" use hot enough water for dishwashing, but he'll "do the dishes" every now and then, and I'm just now realizing how very calculated that move is, as it tells my mother "this is why you shouldn't ask me to do shit". Sorry for the run on, but I literally just blew my own mind. Also, we've had a dishwasher for over a year now, and neither he, nor my adult nephew, have ever loaded or unloaded the damn thing. I'm staying single forever.

[@jmarshal]

@@Melissa-sx9vhthere’s whole groups with men teaching other men these “skills”, especially on places like Weibo in China.

[@scarlettelhive2785]

What's worse is when they purposely mess the thing up and try to blame you for asking them to do it- "I told you I couldn't do it" 😭

[@l3gallyhispancc]

exactly like..wdym you didn’t fold your laundry bc “you couldn’t do it” it’s literally the easiest thing ever

[@aeoligarlic4024]

If he keeps it that way then the only thing to fight it is by pettiness. Oh they won't do any help in the kitchen or laundry? That's too bad, from now on i'll be cooking single serving meals for MYSELF and wash ONLY my laundry and dishes

[@jupiterthree5228]

That's when you force THEM to re-do it until they do it right. Seems like most women just give up.

[@aeoligarlic4024]

@@jupiterthree5228 this! Especially the older generation of women, they're exceptionally permisive with their husband and sons but never forget to berate their daughters for the slight mistakes

[@imdani4997]

worse, they taught their sons to do the same because obviously they can't be the only useless family member

[@Me-hn6ni]

Weaponized incompetence, media illiteracy, and lack of social awareness trifecta that will never fail to make me tweak

[@shrikerrrr]

oh this is just the generic guy in the south with a thin blue line flag punisher skull on his truck that he thinks its appropriate to rev up in public spaces when he literally tore the muffler off himself.

[@slartibartifastoverdrive195]

God KZbin has done so much damage to people's ability to consume and criticize any form of media

[@Me-hn6ni]

@@shrikerrrr what are you talking about?

[@sophiakoshetz8521]

I remember situation when I accidentally left one piece of clothing on the couch (I was too tired after cleaning up the rest of apartment) and my mom did "I'm so disappointed in you" rant because of it. Week later my dad left the whole refrigerator to rot and her reaction was "well he's disoriented sometimes." He was supposed to simply put food into freezer. This is so crazy how men and women are differently treated when things comes to domestic labour.

[@86Framer]

And some spouses (mostly husbands) get blasted for folding the towels slightly wrong or buying a grocery item for themselves that their wife doesn’t enjoy.

[@aeoligarlic4024]

That's is, that's enablers. I bet she's also a boy mom and will never expect her sons to be burdened with chores as well

[@aeoligarlic4024]

​@@86Framer trying to make this a competition huh?

[@86Framer]

@@aeoligarlic4024 It’s not a competition like how many cats you have versus your friends, but men do get the exact same treatment.

[@zoerice4227]

​​@@86Framer not the cat lady accusation lol. What next? Going to imply she eats a tub of ice cream by herself and watches romcoms? Men are so embarrassing. Oof. Even your misogyny is low effort.

[@azura.lit.des.livres]

the "he pays the bills" argument is so weird like... as if women didn't work. as if they weren't paying for anything in the house. as if it wasn't maybe her house and the husband wasn't living with her.

[@DrinkYourNailPolish]

My husband pays the bills (I am disabled and can't work) and he will make dinner for us, put the leftovers away (in our nice tuperware), takes care of the yard work etc. I do the dishes, laundry, vacuum, dust etc but even then, when I am having a rough go of it due to my disability he will pick up the slack. That's how a normal traditional marriage should work. These guys who are like "uhhh I don't ewen knew hew tew tewn on a light swetch! Hewp mweee!" 👶 Are PATHETIC!!

[@wlfie950]

And if the woman works and pays the bills they say "it's still her job to come home cook and do housework"

[@lorrithelinguist]

Ppl always underestimating domestic labour.... Maintaining a house ain't easy!!!

[@captainngoose]

Lol right This isn't the 1950's, women work too. No normal couple can afford a home on single income alone these days

[@Em_Elizabeth]

Yeah, the whole "I break my back at work every day so we can have a future together" rant stopped working when I learned that some of his colleagues were able to keep a clean house and help out their wives. Of course he wrote it off as "if they have the energy to do that they must not be hard workers."

[@KoharuMacchiato]

These are the SAME MEN who complain why their wives divorce and leave their butts! Like HMMMMM I WONDER WHY!

[@Sunny_DeeMILLER]

Exactly 😭

[@UnrealDreamer3598]

'I didn't do anything!" That is exactly why she left you sir.

[@TheJustineCredible]

THIS! ALL THIS!! My GROWN-A son, moved back in with me about 6yrs ago. Since then, he went from being a competent, considerate, normal ADULT to reverting to an inconsiderate, lazy, mooch who has perfected the art of "Weaponized Incompetence!" I didn't raise him like this! I raised him to be able to do FOR HIMSELF! To not have to rely on a woman to do FOR HIM. I taught him to wash his own clothes at ten, taught him to cook throughout his life! He's run restaurants, ran a household. But since his break up and loss of his job, he's turned into a 12yr old who makes excuses for not taking care of himself, let alone doing anything around the house! I REFUSE to constantly be on his back, begging him to do NORMAL ADULT things like take out the trash, wash his dishes, put away anything. I'm OVER being his "Mommy!" He's 35yrs old! I'm in my late 50's, I work full-time, I pay ALL the bills, cook ALL the food, do ALL the shopping and household cleaning. He sits on his computer, chatting away with his "musician friends" on discord, not making a DIME! I'm SICK OF IT!

[@katrina3560]

Lay down the rules, and if he doesn't comply, you have every right (and really should) tell him to leave!

[@Moonpie90]

Sounds a bit like my husbands cousin, managed to survive 2 years at uni alone before he got thrown out for plagiarism (12 years ago), moved home and hasn't worked, dated or done anything except playing computer games. His mummy hasn't gotten fed up yet - hope you kick him enough to figure his life out, good luck!

[@adr3anna]

Umm.. It sounds like he could be depressed? I always give people the benefit of the doubt, but especially bc you said his behavior changed after the breakup, losing his job, being older, and having to move back in with you (his mom). That does a lot to someone’s confidence and he might not care enough about himself to take care of himself like he used to. Did you ask how he’s been mentally? Maybe convince him to try therapy. Just a suggestion, but I could be wrong.

[@aeoligarlic4024]

@@TheJustineCredible MIGHT be depression (it's not always the usual gloomy look like they portray on tv), but that doesn't mean it can't/shouldn't be fixed indeed!

[@katrina3560]

@@adr3anna while you might be on to something about depression. If he is comfortable being this way for 6 years with his mother (so he was aboit 29 when he moved back with her), I imagine it must have been a NON treat to be in a relationship with him. 2 things can be true at once: he may be depressed, but he needs to do something to partake in the household he lives in. She has described a grown toddler man that NO ONE will want to live with, let alone partner up to. Enabling him to continue to live this way is a disservice to herself and him.

[@Moonpie90]

My husband is dyslexic, he spells his own middle name wrong. So no judgement when he spells my middle/last wrong but he always gets me to double check spellings and grammer before he submits serious things. Couples with genuine faults use eachothers strengths, children play up their weaknesses for mummy to fix their messes

[@trianglejenn]

Yes to this!!! Couples should work together and support each other. I think it's fine to genuinely split up tasks based on preferences and who is better at certain things, but it should always be about teamwork and helping each other.

[@baby.nay.]

I’m dyslexic and always ask my bf to proofread something important for me . He has a lot of anxiety and knows I have high emotional intelligence and he asks me to review a text he’s sending out for different reasons . It’s really beautiful when 2 people love and trust each other and can lend each other their skills and strong suits .❤

[@yaboyjosh3023]

You had me at; "My husband is dyslexic" 😂

[@Femfemio]

He uses your labor. He is not a child in need of correction from a teacher. You have chosen wrong in life and he is exploiting you

[@khina3061]

​@Femfemio your whole existence is wrong

[@sig4la]

the makeup goes HARD woah

[@giralarv]

OH MY GOD YEAH

[@cdmp777]

Really tho she looks great

[@allhailralsei]

it slays tbh

[@jigglewigglebug]

REAL

[@star1wolf2]

No for real today’s look was really good.

[@michellereedus9148]

i dont think any women are wondering why men are single. Ive never seen a single video of a woman talking about how men are choosing their cats over them, or going to die alone because they are too picky... thats men. Men are doing that. THEY are the ones not happy theyre alone because they want a mom, not a wife/gf

[@GabrielleTollerson]

exactly!!

[@tiahnarodriguez3809]

Spot on. Women are used to making do and pivoting, while men would rather blame women and wait for us to fix their problems like mommy did because they think it’s our responsibility. Well it ain’t happening.

[@tiahnarodriguez3809]

Men think anything wrong they experience is a woman’s responsibility to fix because that’s how they are raised, while women are raised to make do and pivot. Thats why red pill preaches using women and making us submit.

[@kinkyxkitten666]

They can stay mad lmaooo

[@Em_Elizabeth]

Yeah, I dated a guy who weaponized incompetence. He said it was his learning disability and physical issues but it got to the point where he'd refuse super easy tasks that could easily be done seated. It was ridiculous. Then he said I was a typical selfish b**** and that I was being picky, sorry he wasn't perfect when I left. No, he was bottom of the barrel bad.

[@kanokaamanai5794]

My dad, nearing 60s, born and raised in Mexico and rather traditional. He's been the main provider for the family for a long time and even with my mom working I do believe he takes care of most of the bills. One day my mom was working overtime, so he asked me to do his laundry for his work uniforms (my mom usually does it) and I ended up getting sidetracked with my homework. You know what he did? He called me from my room and asked me to teach him how to use the washing machine. He's never asked me to do his laundry when my mom wasn't around since, he does it himself. When my mom got her job and filled up her schedule sometimes she couldn't make food for us so what does my dad do? He makes his own food or gets take out. There are no excuses for weaponized incompetence.

[@THEYuYama]

you had me in the first half ngl. props to ur dad for using his brain and learning ✨

[@raeraebadfingers]

Okay the air fryer thing enraged me. Like.. regardless of if there were electronics in it or not, that's just a ridiculous thing to even think to put it in the freezer is just lazy and idiotic

[@yourmom9474]

right? like way to focus on the wrong issue and out the blame BACK on the woman

[@erinnadia0409]

I would have divorced him over that

[@raeraebadfingers]

@@erinnadia0409 my boyfriend would probably have Mr committed if I did that 😂

[@rosethorne9155]

Yep. Just disgustingly stupid and selfish.

[@GinaBlythe]

My ex husband said that when both people work that both took care of the house. Once we were married, he forgot how to wash a fork. And, I work with divorce attorneys. The men always say "I did nothing" and it's like that's why you're here. It's because you did nothing. She's given chance after chance after chance and you still did nothing.

[@GabrielleTollerson]

"WHY DO DIVORCE COURTS FAVOR WOMEN MORE??? 😭😭" - these men

[@HuhWHODIDTHIS]

Real. I’m glad to hear “ ex husband “ in this comment.

[@igobothwaysallidoismakewav5039]

"It's because you did nothing"!!!!! All of that!

[@Kysyourself2]

​​@@GabrielleTollersonbecause they're biased and they think that women can do no wrong The same with abuse when a woman abuses a man, the cops just laugh in his face and don't take it seriously when a woman grooms and takes advantage of a young boy He doesn't get taken seriously and they make jokes out of it but if it was the other way around The man would be crucified as he should but if it was a woman oh who cares. He must have liked it It's disgusting this world is disgusting

[@SpookySal13]

The fact that grown adults are acting like this on purpose just baffles me. I became disabled a little over a year ago and it kills me that I can't do a lot for myself and I'm so unbelievably grateful that my partner doesn't act like that

[@RachelVonLee]

I am in a similar boat. I was the perfect homemaker, became disabled, and now I’m watching my house fall apart because “that was my job.” Legit makes me want to unalive myself.

[@SpookySal13]

@@RachelVonLee oh my gosh, I am so sorry!

[@mrssherlockasy4236]

I went to my piercer once. He told me a story when his friend called him for an emergency. It seemed very serious until the guy said he didn't know how to make food because his girlfriend was away. My piercer told him to make pasta, the easiest thing to make and his friend didn't know how to do it. That's why I believe remaining single is a good move. I don't want children anyway.

[@tiahnarodriguez3809]

When I lived on campus, people who couldn’t cook used Google to learn. That’s why I don’t buy the “I don’t know how to cook” excuse.

[@user-bo4dg7sm1c]

DIVORCE PAPERS WHERE TF ARE YOU

[@aeoligarlic4024]

@@user-bo4dg7sm1c they're expensive that's where they are, beyond paywalls 💀

[@cryeah1800]

📑🖊️🙂‍↕️

[@86Framer]

@@user-bo4dg7sm1c How about just not pulling down one’s pants in the first place for a slob? That would save a lot of time and money getting divorced

[@user-bo4dg7sm1c]

@@cryeah1800 thank you bbg

[@Barkinglikeiwantitbbg]

That's what I'm saying, leave the man baby atp

[@GenerationJonesi]

Years ago i had to work on Thnxgiving and asked my bf to vacuum the living room. As i was walking back to the kitchen, his friend said -just do it crap and she wont ask you again. I turned and said -if you do a crappy job, you'll do it again until you get it right. And, im telling your wife(the friend) what you said. Im sure she'll be interested in that. ...Yeah, the shtf at his house and my guy vacuumed the LR. My brothers know how to cook and clean. If you dont know how then you'll learn. I'm not having your lazy ass.

[@GabrielleTollerson]

IKR

[@joem-q4m]

girl, I would have kicked him out right then and there for even suggesting my bf do something childish like that... then I'd question my bf if that's really a "bro" he wants to have in his life. god, and these are the same babies that whine about not being able to get a gf. I bet if that same homeboy witnessed a woman doing this with her girlfriends, he'd flip and go on a rant about women.

[@carolinpurayidom4570]

Girl you should have dumped then and there

[@jocelynsmyth6604]

Good on you GenerationJonesi - he can vacuum the living room, you're his partner, not a maid. Gotta work together

[@milaclarke7904]

This is why it’s important that parents don’t baby their kids ESPECIALLY their boys. It was happening with my brother for a while, it was our first time me and him had to do chores, taking turns every night loading the dishwasher. At first he would make excuses not to do it or he would “forget”, but that wouldn’t cut it for my mum anymore. He started loading the dishwasher incorrectly on purpose, plates facing down, bowls left wherever, CUPS LEFT UPRIGHT TO COLLECT DIRTY DISH WATER, you get the idea. My mum had showed him how to do it right several times, and it got to a point where I had to step by step show him because his abysmal stacking left more dishes dirty for me when it was my turn. He deadass said if I was so fussy about it and new how to do it properly then I should just do it instead. He knew what he was doing, it was very intentional, eventually I was doing the dishes every night for a while until I went on strike. My mother was just letting him get away with not doing his fair share and I wasn’t going to stand for it anymore, I started feeling like a mom having to do everything when I still had to survive high school on the side, I wasn’t the one who had kids so why should I have to parent my brother?? (Mind you he’s only a year younger than me, so there was no excuse of age). Now she forces him to do all the dishes while I’m on full laundry duty. He still stacks things wrong sometimes, usually when he really doesn’t want to get on with it, but through enough repetition and my mum not letting him get away with it anymore he’s starting to be better weaponises his incompetence less. It really does fall on parents for a lot of this stuff, if a son grew up in a house where his mom did EVERYTHING he’s going to grow up with the expectation his future wife/ SO will be his maid, and will inevitably be difficult when they actually have expectations and bare minimum effort they have to do. I don’t care what your job is, you’d need a job even if you were single, your stay at home partner is the one who is facilitating you to do your job and making sure your lives are running smoothly enough that you can maintain that job. So unless your job is so exhausting you can’t even wipe your own ass when you get home there is no fucking excuse why you can’t do the bare minimum house maintenance, (who am I kidding, there’s men out there who would rather let it crust than do their part).

[@HannahSoMaFu]

This reminds me of my brother and mum She is rightfully so annoyed with me when I don't participate in the chores as much as I could but still changes the sheets for my brother ..I'm 26 and he is 20 💀

[@dance_for_me]

This is the same anger I feel when my sims put dirty dishes around the house...

[@lindseyhiccups]

This is such a great comparison 😢 they just put it down, not even put it away

[@ketameanii]

YES

[@bubblexx11]

My bio dad used to do this to my mum, acted like a full on teenager boy and then me, his 15 year old daughter could do jobs better than him. There's a reason i call him my bio dad now.,

[@86Framer]

If your mom didn’t use a sperm back to conceive you, or it happened through “grape” then you really shouldn’t use “bio dad” as his title. He was good enough to live with your mom for well over a decade and allowed to finish inside of her to help produce multiple offspring.

[@aeoligarlic4024]

That's still too nice tbh. He's more like a dna blueprint contributor or sperm donor

[@Thesecondaryman-ol2pp]

y? got rubber/latex dad now?

[@thayanebraga4872]

@@Thesecondaryman-ol2ppshe got the same ones that you put on your @ss every night

[@86Framer]

@@thayanebraga4872 Your internalized homophobia is showing

[@xLivvyxx]

THE BABY FROM THAT VIDEO… I SRSLY HOPE THE LIL GUY’S OKAY!! LIKE- WHO HAS *THAT* MUCH “INCOMPETENCE” TO LET THE BABY GET STUCK BETWEEN THE COUCH PILLOWS…?!?!

[@elenalizabeth]

I think it was on purpose to act like a squeezing cuddle feeling for the baby. It’s probably not the safest though 🤔

[@xLivvyxx]

@@elenalizabeth definitely not safe- i’m not a parent but i do know from experince, from putting my arms or legs in between the couch cushions, that those things are TIGHT.. like- it doesn’t hurt- but it’s alot of pressure-

[@UnkxwnEvan]

Eliza the baby was crying 💀.

[@jenirichard380]

@@UnkxwnEvan If you rewatch the video, it says the baby was crying, then there was silence.

[@rosethorne9155]

That guy didn't "let" the kid get stuck. He wedged the baby in there on purpose.

[@iamcoco_yo]

If my husband/bf doesn’t do something correctly, I’m definitely asking that mf to do said task again. Obviously, you need some practice boo n we’re gonna do it til you get it right🤣🤣

[@Hawra-t8q]

Either he has learn or we getting a divorce

[@Jellieisbi]

Have to agree. My bf is amazing at compasses (we were doing Duke of Edinburgh) and I was not great. However even if he could’ve done it faster and more accurately I made him show me how to do it so I could calculate bearings etc by myself. In my mind it’s like that for any other task, if you don’t know how, learn!

[@imdani4997]

I saw someone said the problem is we encouraged women to go to work (rightfully so due to current economy) but doesn't encourage men to learn or do housework. Hell, even basic things like cleaning up after themselves or small chores is good enough. Women lives in the present but (some) men still lives in the past. Still treating their wife like their mom. Wanting to be coddle and kiss in the forehead but still being seen as 'the head of the house' to boost their ego. It's embarassing

[@toxiczombiewolf5692]

Or even wash themselves properly

[@Em_Elizabeth]

Yeah, when the housework and cooking is viewed by some families as the "women's work" instead of as basic life skills, the boys grow up not knowing how to keep a clean house or cook their own meals when they're older.

[@UnrealDreamer3598]

These men leave skid marks on their pantsu, then wonder why women won't sleep with them.

[@Gothofasaia]

as an autistic woman i always wondered why i am always compared to neurotypical men..i feel like this is why

[@ketameanii]

😭

[@lk-vq3qh]

why you think they are neurotypical

[@valentinecore]

i would say that the difference is you might not be able to or know implicitly how to do certain things, but it’s not on purpose. w these men, it’s on purpose

[@JoeyisDREADful]

​​@@valentinecore yeah, when I do things a dumb way it's either a) my way of doing the thing is weird but I have a reason I believe this to be a good way to do the thing b) I took what you said so literally that I've done something ridiculous but it's precisely what you asked for and I genuinely thought I was being attentive. 😅 Either way when someone's like "wtf" I will explain the autistic ass reasoning to my madness and we can definitely have a conversation about the miscommunication so I'm not driving everyone insane. Autistic people can *definitely* still do weaponized incompetence though. If you are just having miscommunications but you just go "can't help it, autistic" you're still weaponizing it. If you're functional enough to have relationships, you're functional enough to talk through to a solution. Anything you legitimately can't do still is something you need to discuss. My partner cannot STAND the way I load the dishwasher, just a pet peeve, and I legitimately do not understand what they think is so different about how I do it so I just do all the putting away and everything that needs handwashing, they load. We got a "dirty/clean" magnet sign so I don't forget to unload as well. There's always a solution if you give a shit.

[@AdgbbdgyMdgarcdgy-ub2bu]

Anytime they screw something up on purpose, take it away. Can’t clean the toaster? Ya don’t get to use it anymore. Can’t put the cookies away? No cookies for you! You won’t fold the laundry? No clothes for you.

[@Em_Elizabeth]

If they want to act like kids, they'll face the silly consequences like a kid.

[@AdgbbdgyMdgarcdgy-ub2bu]

@@Em_Elizabeth exactly

[@jadecoolness101]

@@Em_Elizabeth if you have to soft parent your boyfriend, at that point, just dump him.

[@fermentedstrawberry]

If my man ever dares to act like this it's an immediate divorce. Idgaf I will start yelling

[@Dagothae]

It's a very real form of manipulation. I would shit on weaponized incompetence guys with the guy who was using it against me! It didn't register because he had a valid reason to be a little mixed up at the start (we were freshly 18 at college and his parents had genuinely equipped him with zero life skills) but it came with other manipulation and abuse, it was awful.

[@nightmare5693]

My brother weaponizes incompetence like this to. He’ll leave plates in the fridge with literally scraps on them, or when you ask him to put things away like food he’ll just put the whole pot in the fridge or freezer. My mom literally has cancer and he is still refusing to do anything. All he does is sit on his ass and play video games. When you ask him to do the dishes he breaks a dish, because ’woops’, you ask him to throw things away and he throws it next to the trash can, you ask him to take the trash out the trash bag magically rips every time. You ask him to do the liter box and suddenly there is cat shit everywhere. You ask him to sit down and have a chat on how you are gunna help take care of your mom who can’t currently take care of herself because she has cancer in her thyroid and needs it removed and you can’t keep cleaning the house by yourself while trying to start school again, ‘I can’t do this right now, it’s to overwhelming and I need a minute’. He did this even before we found out about the cancer so I know it’s not something else. It sickens me. He has literally walked past my mom as she is throwing up and asking for help, and he called me on the phone from downstairs to come upstairs and said nothing more. I can’t deal with him anymore and I don’t know what to do. I just hate him now

[@HoneyBunny.]

Ask your brother if he wants his mom to "kick the bucket?" Because him not helping his own mother is certainly not helping her situation. I would then tell him if he doesn't start helping, and she "goes to the great beyond, " that you will make sure that everyone who knows him, will be told how he treated his mother in her final moments. Tell him that you will tell in great details, how he treated you during this time. If everything is "too much" for him to handle now, let him know that things WILL get much more uncomfortable than anything he is dealing with now. Shame and consequences of one's own actions can be great motivators, when just doing what's right because it's the right thing to do, isn't enough to get up and do something. I hope that this helps you if you decide to try it. Please let me know how things turn out if you tell him this!👍🙏❤️ I just want to say, that I hope that your mom notices everything that you are doing for her. God bless you and your whole family, may each of you be gifted the strength that you need in these trying times.

[@akarifuyuki9763]

Don't take care of him. Just your mother. Let him cook his own food, wash his own dishes and clothes. Don't care if he does it right or not. Separate your and mother's belongings from his. Some men are fine living in dirtiness so just let them be. Don't forget to always say "Oh my poor baby brother can't even take care of their own shit. Poor him".

[@NotSoWickedMystic]

Throw it out, sis. You and your mom don't need that. Love, a Single mom, cancer survivor

[@HazyDayzPlayz]

Regardless of electronics. In the air fryer basket, they're *not designed to go in freezers*. The outside is plastic. He could have completely ruined the integrity of the plastic and next time they go to use it, either completely break the basket, or potentially leek plastic chemicals into the food.... Disgusting..

[@ganja_bb4203]

How do men think we know how to do stuff? We didn't just wake up one day knowing how to take care of a kid or clean a whole house. If we can learn, there's no reason they can't.

[@iloveyoutothemoonandback5451]

They took Rodrick’s ideas of how to get out of chores way to serious

[@Doll._.Face5518]

LMAOOOO BWAHAHAH😭😭😭

[@elawa_]

im the only girl in my class, i study electrical engineering and every friday is for cleaning the hall we work at, my whole class thought that oh obviously cuz im a woman im just going to clean up after their asses too right? these fuckers legit sat on top of the tables scrolling tiktok while i cleaned. told my teacher and now i get to leave early and they all clean :D

[@irisateastick]

Omg i hate it.. Such immature behavior

[@dabignoseseal]

Honestly !! Like what??? Grow up

[@polarbearsarecutee]

it SUCKS! Husbands and wives like that need to grow up and suck it up

[@rivzr]

real because what the actual fudge

[@polarbearsarecutee]

REAL

[@aeoligarlic4024]

The scary thing is that we usually wouldn't know until we're trapped in the relationship

[@86Framer]

You can easily see a man/woman baby slob coming from a mile away, if they’re not living with their parents.

[@lauralanthalasa7]

You can know. Live with the guy before marriage.

[@86Framer]

@@aeoligarlic4024 You can always find out if they’re a slob or not before you let him raw dog you or get married

[@86Framer]

@@aeoligarlic4024 Slobs can easily be spotted a mile away. Maybe just stop dating or pulling your pants down for them?

[@Mupyeong]

​@@lauralanthalasa7Nope. I have seen marriages where the guy randomly evolved and others where they turned from a functioning human being into an oversized toddler. You can never ever expect this shit to go smooth. Be open and up front about what you expect and find compromises. If your husband/bf/wife/gf sucks at chores but excels at yardwork expect them to put shit in the sink but wash it yourself.

[@Candied3]

men like this make me SO ANGRY

[@wlfie950]

Don't waste any energy on them. Just leave quietly

[@Em_Elizabeth]

It hits close to home

[@okayolek]

2:00 im afraid you underestimate how little men have to do around the house growing up. my younger brother is 18 and till very recently (i moved out; before that him me and our mother lived together) the only thing he had to do around the house was throwing away trash. and even that he had to be reminded of. every. single. week. because our mother never held him accountable for fcking up. EVER. so he never felt like there would be consequences for forgetting to do something or doing it badly. because our mother would ALWAYS make ME do it, while he could fck off to his room. even till this day, my grandma says 'you know how boys are' when i complain how my brother does nothing around the house. and it turns out, the same story happened to my mother and her own younger brother. the cycle of letting men get away with not doing the most basic tasks continues generation after generation. i moved out because i was too frustrated with how my mother wouldn't stand up for herself and demand her son help around just a little bit. :(

[@joem-q4m]

if i ever have a son, im teaching him not to be like this. people really need to raise their damn sons better. im sorry you had to deal with that.

[@anstraerie]

that sucks. :/

[@jmarshal]

I keep saying it but the solution to weaponized incompetence is malicious education. If they’re going to act like a five year old, educate them like one!

[@Kenji-fp1ln]

I'm an autistic teenager who can't do the basic things a normal teenager can- but it's mostly because I was neglected most of my life and never learned how to do them. Acting dumb on purpose to not have to do things is just so terrible of a thought to me.

[@dont_harsh_my_mellow]

But you can learn. All it takes is a google search or a KZbin video for most of this stuff. My friend’s eight year old niece was neglected until last year. Also autistic. Family wanted a “perfect child”. Now, after being adopted by her aunt, she’s learned how to help with the dishes, put things away, sweep, fold clothes, and help with food prep. It just takes a bit of work! You got it! Woooop!

[@MorbidMaximus666]

Adding onto the support train as another autistic person :D! I was never really taught how to do basic chores either, and was screamed at when I did them incorrectly, which basically made me just.. Absolutely terrified to do anything ever. I was so scared of doing things wrong that I tried to just do nothing at all. I’m slowly reparenting myself and learning that making mistakes is not the end of the world, even if it was beyond scary when I failed years ago. A helpful thing to keep in mind is that the tasks themselves aren’t generally difficult, it’s overcoming your anxiety of failure. Your brain is only trying to protect you, but it can wrongly identify a situation as dangerous-like basic chores. It isn’t scary because it’s hard, it’s scary because you associate it with punishment. When you do it wrong and don’t punish yourself for the mistake, it gets easier to do, as you realize that you’re not in danger for messing up. One of my favorite quotes from Anime that just happens to be super inspiring/motivating is from My Hero Academia; “Focus on how to recover from a mistake, instead of the mistake itself.” Lots of support, we’re in this together. ♡

[@fujoshisforronaldreagan]

@@MorbidMaximus666thank you so much for your comment!! As another autistic person that’s really helpful. 🫶

[@Carla-ez4yi]

My younger sister always used this tactic during the whole childhood. I was always the one that had to do chores/tasks because she did them so horribly that she wasn't even called to do them anymore/did the bare minimum. The worst part is, that I was always held accountable for my sister's actions, because I was the oldest and should "set the right example". You wouldn't believe with how many stuff I had to put up during something as basic as going to school. She'd always prefer to walk home with her friends (I didn't like them) when we were supposed to go by a bus home. Once I got fed up and decided to just go home alone by a bus while she had to walk. I received an earful when I got home first.

[@DrinkYourNailPolish]

I will never understand parents that are like that. It's like "Here, you raise your sister".

[@ketameanii]

@@DrinkYourNailPolishit’s frustrating fr as an oldest daughter that got parentified

[@discoduckgandolf]

To Carla's parents: It's a parent's job to "set the right example", not the child's. That's whole point of being parents. To Carla: Yeah, I think it's pretty obvious that the weaponized incompetence started with your parents, because obviously, they were weaponizing their incompetence as being parents, which in turn taught your sister to use weaponized incompetence.

[@toecutterjones]

When they leave a scrap of toilet paper on the roll that wouldn't even be enough for a squirrel so they don't have to change it drives me bananas.

[@LittleLadElia]

i GASPED when i saw her makeup in this video it's so stunning

[@IDK14333]

Realll

[@YourNewSleepParalysisDemon]

I'm trying to teach teenage boys about how to clean up after themselves. Because when you're the head of household, this behavior is irresponsible and kinda sad. I mean, these men are literally wasting their time and resources to pretend they're useless. Not in this economy. The kids are mad, but i have unlimited patience. It's inexcusable to expect someone else to cater to you. Especially a partner.

[@akarifuyuki9763]

Please! Never ever let your children, boy and girl do nothing! I experience it first hand how does it feel to live with someone like that. It's so tiring but no matter how many times you talk to them, remind them again and again, they will forget it. Plus it will cost their health too. If they're not an active person, don't do any exercise, just eat whatever and sleep at home after work, they may become an obesse.

[@Peajay007]

my narcissistic ex thought it was funny to throw his dirty clothed next to the hamper instead of in. i told him if he doesn't put them In the hamper they wont get washed. guess what. he didn't have any clean clothing. he lost his shit then shoved the clothing in to the hamper so hard he broke it. i kicked him out a week later. FYI the hamper was the beginning of the end

[@Kit.Kat_.Bar20]

As you should queen

[@Peajay007]

@@Kit.Kat_.Bar20it’s interesting what can tip a situation over the Edge. It was a nightmare of a week till that Sunday afternoon when I told him to pack his bag and get out.

[@Kit.Kat_.Bar20]

@@Peajay007 I can only imagine what you felt, I’m glad you escaped that shithead

[@lillianademedici8645]

These men... My step mom got upset when she discovered me teaching my son who to do laundry, make himself simple meals, and clean a bathroom. She "raised" a son and a grand son. Is there really disbelief this sh.. Is real?

[@Em_Elizabeth]

Some people are so extreme with the gender role thing that they think teaching boys how to cook and clean is somehow "emasculating" them. ... As if setting them up rely on someone else to do simple tasks is any better.

[@MarkZimmerman1776]

6:21 I wanna know who exactly puts part of an AIR FRYER IN A FREEZER. Like, seriously?

[@Rawrz4starz]

this is how my parents r. if my mom goes somewhere for a day or 2 the house is a MESS bc my dad cant clean up and my sister makes it worse and i the oldest has to clean up the house and take my mom's place. its so annoying that my dad cant do it but his oldest daughter can. it just kinda makes me mad. the fit goes hard tho i love the necklace :)

[@GabrielleTollerson]

I so want to know where she shops for her things 🥹

[@Rawrz4starz]

@@GabrielleTollerson fr like clothes shopping leak ??

[@alphamarina1371]

I know that feeling. My brother (26) doesn’t do his dirty dishes and leaves them in the sink, leaving me (22) and my mom (59) to do it. My mom has talked to him about it so many times and she’s told me to pick up after him and I’m tired of it.

[@Kits_A_Star]

Seriously this is so annoying. Don't look at the gender, look at the age. These are grown adults. I understand that even adults make mistakes, but grown adults should be able to take care of themselves. It's genuinely funny to me that people think that the grown man shouldn't have to clean his mess but the woman should clean it for him. AN ADULT SHOULD BE ABLE TO CLEAN UP AFTER THEMSELVES.

[@Annathestickman]

You're not "unable" to do the task, you're just lazy.

[@jupiterthree5228]

More like evil. They're trying to push as far as they can and when they can't push anymore they call their wife/girlfriend a NAG to further bring her down.

[@renamon5658]

I use to be lazy. But started to be more mature when i was in my late 20s

[@UnkxwnEvan]

Theres older men who are still lazy 💀

[@tiahnarodriguez3809]

That’s normal and apart of growing up. These men, however don’t grow past a certain stage for some reason. Like it’s not even just entitlement, they literally don’t develop past 15 or something.

[@UnkxwnEvan]

1:24 Scary to think a guy woulda saw this and thought he was being a "funny dad"....

[@Void-thingy]

WAKE UP POOKIES! MOTHER HAS FED US

[@cosmicalnight]

I AM AWOKEN. But also.. ninjago fan spotted?!??!?!??! 😍

[@H34RTS4CHUUYA]

I have risen 😈

[@happykats513]

@@cosmicalnight STAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWP I READ THAT AS NIGGA HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLPPPP MMMMMMMMWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE✋🏻

[@PaletteDreams-i1p]

IM AWAKE

[@Void-thingy]

@@cosmicalnight :3 someone noticed!

[@rainqueen3385]

"Throw it away, Jeremy. Throw it away, Jeremey!" Has the same energy as " It's Candy Mountain, Charlie!!! "

[@moss_phrog4065]

my 24 year old brother leaves his food in the microwave then gets mad when someone takes his food out of the microwave to use the microwave 🧍‍♂️ like brother man, it’s the FAMILY microwave, we’re gonna use the gah damn microwave too

[@mickslife365]

I always felt like if you go out of your way to be “bad” at house work so your partner does it, you don’t want a partner, you want a mother

[@yaya_pagan]

Strangely enough my older sister is the one who uses weaponized incompetence she 20 years old and claims she doesn’t know how to put a dog in a kennel, take meat out to thaw, or unload groceries from the car, but she’s majoring in biochem at university.

[@user-dx2dm8oq8g]

Some people don't wanna learn and some know and do it on purpose. I've ran my social experiment and seen men in my family live in filth rather exert energy cleaning. Walking up to you asking what's for diner and starve when no one else cooks. This has turned me off completely from wanting to date and marriage.

[@shannarastorm451]

My almost 10 year old can do better than half of these men 😂 Boy loves doing the washing up 🤷🏼‍♀️

[@ppenelopee]

"what if he was stoned" you could get a whole ass lobotomy and still not think of putting an eir fryer in the fridge

[@ketameanii]

11:54 bruh the way he just spread it EVERYWHERE instead of getting a wet nappy and using that to pick it up😭😭😭😭

[@kys00011]

Exactly😭 he also wasnt even trynna scoop it up he was fully spreading it everywhere.

[@bugboy6676]

As a man, I wish that I could do everything for my girlfriend. If I could I wouldn't ever let her touch a dirty dish or a rag to clean. What has happened to men that makes them want to make their partner do everything for them? Are they just not in love enough to want their partners life to be the best possible??

[@ClearViewReports]

most beta male thing i've ever read.

[@Voidbitz64]

It baffles me what some of these people do?! I'm an autistic young adult living with a parent and considering I'm not that able to do many things which would be classed as general everyday things I'm still not as far gone as these people, at this point this sort of stuff should be common sense😭

[@GabrielleTollerson]

SAME

[@Frankie-v4q]

Him putting the baby in between the couch was actually dangerous. The baby could have had trouble breathing being stuffed in between the couch like that.

[@HazyDayzPlayz]

My ex was a man-child. He worked full time at Clark Rubber. I drove him to and from work almost every day because he still didn't have a licence until he was 30 (I was 19, he was 25 at the time). I studied at university full-time, had a part time job, had to do *all* of the chores around the house. If I asked him to hang the washing on a sunny day when I had to leave for work, he'd put it in the dryer. When it was his turn to wash dishes, he'd leave it until there were literally no clean dishes left; he'd do as much dishes as would fit on the drying rack and say "I'll finish the rest later" and then never finish them. He wanted a kitten (I wanted a cat from the rescue, because their personality has developed and you'll know if they're a good match); it was supposed to be *his* cat, but I did all of the cleaning up, making sure the water was full, vet appointments; I still have the cat because when we broke up he moved somewhere they don't allow pets (I adore the cat, and I'm his person but he's been an inconvenience to my life on occasion). He refused to shave, even when I would be in tears, because kissing him with stubble was really painful. He once literally yelled at me for calling him out for falling asleep at his computer instead of going to bed, insisting that he wasn't asleep... I stayed with him for far too long because he was a "nice person" 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 Thankfully my next two relationships were/are with wonderful people, who not only take care of themselves, but take care of me too 😊😊😊 Don't settle for anything less than a *partner*: someone who will work *with* you, not act like you're against them..

[@vcutler4735]

Expressing concern about the air fryer basket is valid because extreme Temps and humidity can damage electronics! So then it's not only dumb but it could also destroy the air fryer!

[@lilianecardoso2865]

I just had a fight with my boyfriend because he didn't close everything that he opened, everything that you saw in this video he doe's the same, I really thing being alone is the best think. His answers when I told him to close the thinks he open was "omg, everyday the same sh*t". Is not lack of communication soo I don't know, I am soo tired, I feel like a can't count on him for nothing. My health has been affecting even more with his behavior, I am always stressed out. Don't do this to ourselves like me is NOT worthy.

[@angela_tarantulas]

I feel you ❤️‍🩹 almost the same here 🤬

[@Melissa-sx9vh]

Leave him, a man is never worth your health! If you stay with him do you want to raise children with him? If you do, do you want him to teach your potential children that? Do you want to have the same argument everyday until you are 70? 80? 90?

[@GabrielleTollerson]

he gaslights you,WOW. Dump his goofy ass

[@cet1r1z1ne]

Get out of there! He has no respect for you with a comment like "same sh*t every day", and he will only get worse when he thinks you can't/won't leave.

[@HazyDayzPlayz]

Leave him. He won't get better. If he doesn't respect you now (which he doesn't) he won't respect you in the future. Being single is *far better* than being with someone who doesn't respect or care about you.

[@casscat7]

men forcing women to do all the household duties, trying to make them all traditional and everything, and then being a lazy biach themselves, is so awful. more men, and people in general, need to clean up after themselves more and have more common courtesy. i have siblings that are beyond lazy, when me and my mom often try to keep the place clean

[@DenizDuzyol]

"He pays the bills" as if he wasn't in a relationship he wouldn't do house chores AND pay the bills also. The hypocrisy

[@blueberry-the-wolf6095]

Never understood this argument. Like paying the bills isn’t even remotely taxing as doing domestic labor which is something you do every single day of the month and not once a month like paying bills. This is also the 21st Century where women can work and have bank accounts, paying the bills and being the breadwinner isn’t enough because an actual adult can juggle being a breadwinner and domestic labor.

[@DenizDuzyol]

@@blueberry-the-wolf6095 yess like millions of women who have full time jobs and are also responsible for all of the domestic labor are not even part of this conversation. The double standards of this topic is so ugly.

[@blueberry-the-wolf6095]

@@DenizDuzyol ALSO!! We live in the age of the internet where you can teach yourself to do anything online! Like you can’t tie your tie, there’s videos on how to do that. Can’t cook? There are so many recipes online that you can use. These men are so childish and the fact they have no shame is just disgusting. One reason I’m glad my mom made sure me and my brother and sister knew how to do chores because those are basic life skills.

[@DenizDuzyol]

@@blueberry-the-wolf6095 exactly. Looking after yourself is a basic survival skill. Kudos to you and your mamma ✊

[@bindedbygloves]

My father uses weaponized incompetence quite often, my mother has noticed but a lot of the time she won't point it out. Though I dont mention it often either, neither does my older brother

[@ThomasWake1]

Doing something intentionally wrong and playing dumb and innocent is so EVIL

[@SarahXTsunami]

If he can build a pc, he can put dishes away. no excuses!

[@jupiterthree5228]

My boyfriend is also an adult. We split the chores. For example, he will wash and dry the clothes and I will fold them/put them away RIGHT OUT OF THE DRYER. Everytime :D We never have a dish in the sink, either. He washes the bulk of the dishes before he eats. I'm never letting him go.

[@Hawra-t8q]

i inspire to have a bf like him

[@jadecoolness101]

The fact that men are so universally worthless that one doing the bare minimum is "never let go" material... "NoT aLL MeN!" But all men benefit.

[@thecauldronkeeper4458]

Not my husband, but my dad was HORRIBLE when it came to weaponized incompetence. I wanna say i was like 6(? Maybe 7) he literally ADMITTED TO ME that if he just did whatever my mom asked him to do bad, she wouldnt ask him again. I never told her because it was pretty freakimf obvious, but i did start to call him out on it as i got older. He doesnt do that type of stuff anymore but maaaaaan was it annoying.

[@UnkxwnEvan]

Men saying this is childish behavior? Boi you act like a child 💀

[@GabrielleTollerson]

IKR 😂 the lack of self awareness is astounding!

[@Em_Elizabeth]

Yeah, they insist we are overreacting when we're rightfully mad.

[@Anonymous-rs1ue]

one of my male colleagues is the definition of weaponized incompetence. where i work, my department does a looottt of regular cleaning where we follow a protocoll of how, when, where we should clean; as well as how we should place the things getting away from cleaning. this man, put everything on our working stations, on the floor, took 3 hours (it takes me an hour even when i am interrupted every 5 minutes), didnt clean well enough, i even wrote him step-by-step instructions on how to clean "properly" so we dont get a complaint from the HR. tell me why, he suddenly does not know how to read? or has common sense?

[@Anonymous-rs1ue]

I live in a all-woman household and thank god I dont have to put up wish this level of chosen-incomptence on a regular basis; except when I am on the same shift as specimen A from my initial comment.

[@mm-ln9sw]

i don’t know how any of the men that act like this get laid. if my husband was like this i would be so unattracted to him i wouldn’t even want him lmao i probably wouldn’t have even married him. thankfully mine knows how to be a real man and step up to help me when i need it. it is supposed to be teamwork anyways!

[@Anarchy_Angel94]

​@@mm-ln9sw Men who act like that tend to think sex is owed to them and will guilt trip/manipulate their wife's into continuing to sleep with them. Some will even resort to cheating if they're not getting any from their wife, and then they blame the wife becoz they're certainly not gonna blame themselves. I see men like that as being no different than dogs.

[@GabrielleTollerson]

​@@mm-ln9sw IKR

[@Anonymous-rs1ue]

@@mm-ln9sw and they act like their wives dont have a full-time job outside the house, or when they are housewife that their work is NEVER done. yet they can come home after their 9-5 and call it a day while their wives work 24/7 and have another child (husband) to take care of. since when was basic human survival skills not taught? like it started cooking for myself at 9 because my parents worked 24/7 and came home at 8pm. And a grown ass man doesnt know how to store "leftovers" properly?? like how???

[@l3gallyhispancc]

bro i always rage when i see videos like this, and theres always people defending this foolish behavior 😭

[@erinmartin1768]

I'm not sure if it's the phenomenon of weaponized incompetence in my house. My fiancé grew up in a hoarding situation and has OCD. He is capable of picking up after himself, doing his own laundry, dishes, ect. However, he didn't get the memo on cleaning the house. Again, he didn't grow up in a clean house so I can see why it wouldn't occur to him to do so. Luckily, if I ask him with help around the house, he obliges without protest. On his OCD, he got the intrusive thoughts but nothing in the way of organizing. His spacial awareness is non-existant. So its a weird mixed bag of "nurture vs nature". He keeps his mess confined to he spaces in the home and I keep mine to my spaces. It somehow works. 🤷‍♀️

[@akarifuyuki9763]

I don't think it's weaponized incompetence, except he intentionally do that so you stop ask him. Some people are just that incompetence and they can't understand the problem, because of various reasons. It's like people nag at you but you still don't get it, because you can't see their problem "I don't see what's the problem, how is it a problem".

[@star1wolf2]

My siblings and I have actual issues and make fuck ups all the time because of our numerous mental illnesses (and my siblings have more experience with controlled substance use) and yet we still haven’t done really any shit close to this. The worst situation I can think of was a my sibling accidentally putting my ice cream cake in the fridge. But she just forgot I told her to put it in the freezer and apologized after. (She also would have cleaned it up but I was fine fixing the mess). Like this is unacceptable man, not even my grandpa whose memory is failing does anything close to this. (If anything sometimes he does the opposite which is decide he’s going to do my dishes for me when they are left in the sink just soaking for half an hour while I eat. He used to be bad about yelling at me afterwards for being lazy even though he obviously also doesn’t do his dishes until after he eats. But he’s gotten better at that part).

[@HazyDayzPlayz]

Yay for mental illness! /s (I have adhd). The ice-cream cake reminded me of a funny story: I had one for my 13th or 14th birthday. There was one slice left and I was going to have it the next morning. It got left out on the counter and the next day I said "where's my cake???"..... 😅😅😅

[@Jesxaix]

My husband spelled my sons name wrong on his birth certificate after I had a very traumatic birth and couldn’t. He forgot the second T so I will forever remember his stupidity when I spell my sons name. RIDICULOUS

[@carolinemerciermusic]

They know how to get rid of the blood and bodies once they killed their spouse: definitely weaponised incompetence.

[@2008himedoll]

this is my worst fear fr I do not want a guy like this in my life

[@DeliciousBoi]

This ain't specifically a male thing, my mom and grandma tried to raise me to be their servant so they didn't even have to get out of bed. Whenever I call out their behavior they call me an ungrateful son/grandson and tell me I owe them.

[@happykats513]

owe them for what? them giving you food and shelter so you dont die, just like any other parent?

[@DeliciousBoi]

@@happykats513 That, "raising me right", and making sure I was too scared to drop out of a school that let me be as abused by students and staff as I was at home by family, because "getting a good education is all that matters, and I made sure you got that".

[@kichan]

While it sucks, that's not necessarily weaponized incompetence. That's just putting all of the responsibilities on you. Weaponized incompetence is specifically and purposefully doing a bad job at a task that you've been asked to do so that the other person will give up on asking you for help. It's a manipulation tactic.

[@DeliciousBoi]

@@kichan They've done their fair share of that too, which is what made me think of them. They would purposefully do shit wrong or even damage or destroy things because myself and others would jump their ass over not helping. Coincidentally I'm currently wearing a favorite black shirt I've had since HS that Grandma "accidentally" spilled bleach on one day when I asked her to start the next load of laundry as I was dealing with the dryer and folding the laundry.

[@HopefulDarkness]

You’re not wrong, but the majority of the cases seen is generally a man tryna do a piss poor job to make the wife do everything. So you’re right it’s not specifically a male thing, just the majority of the time is the man either being lazy asf or purposely having a toddler mindset to make the wife do everything.

[@jaymese.950]

I used to do this before I realized I have an invisible disability and actually was having a hard time completing tasks but no one believed me so I started doing this to save my energy

[@jamie6673]

thank you for acknowledging that it's different if the person can't do the task.

[@soybrujaja]

I have seen the scraps on plates in the fridge in single mens fridges more often than I'd like to admit 😥

[@GabrielleTollerson]

wtf

[@Em_Elizabeth]

If they intend to eat it later, at least put a wrap over the plate so it doesn't get dried out.

[@wedfomi5303]

My younger brother is exactly like this. He started this since he was a little child and my mother cept encouraging him instead of teaching him. This worked out for him, because my parents just forced his part of the cleaning and working around the house on me. But since I've got a job he's in big troubles, because my parents need to force my brother to do his stuff. So the tasks are pileing up and there's nobody at home to teach him. Half of the house is a constant mess, because nobody has time to do his jobs. He's 16 so he should know bether than playing dumb. I told him countless times, but he refuses to lissen. So I don't have a single drop of empaphy when he's freaking out, because he has no shirts to wear or his room is full of insects because of the rotting food and empty plates.

[@elliotangie381]

I mean, I can let this slide, if they let me tease them about how stupid and helpless they are. Every. Single. Minute of our together-life, until we eventually and inevitably break up. It’s fun to mock people.

[@RaphaPortoRP]

6:01 who puts an entire air fryer bucket inside a fridge? This man is insane!

[@carolklein8049]

Lol he didn't "clean" up the hot sauce, he "wipped" it up lol

[@RachelVonLee]

I hate it so much. It’s exhausting. I’m disabled and I feel trapped.

[@zedsterCH]

The guy wiping the counter is obviously an act lol

[@Riatehmonstrrbunneh]

I’m so glad I’m a lesbian, the shit people go through being with men just isn’t worth it

[@pandagalibardo3674]

SAME

[@diobrando1616]

Women can definitely be the same way but yeah its mostly (cishet) men lol. That's why I am likely not gonna end up with a cisgender man even though I'm a gay trans man.

[@RachelVonLee]

God I wish I was fr. Men are awful.

[@CatboyShadowbox]

Girls won’t save you from the fate of wasting your life on an awful relationship

[@diobrando1616]

@@CatboyShadowbox My comment was deleted for some reason, but I agree that women can be like this too but it is mostly men, which is why I am more cautious when it comes to cis men in particular. I don't know why but the more privileged someone is, the more likely they suck.

[@_zzofiom]

im aromantic but this makes me wanna be in a relationship just to show how easy it is to do something that you’re responsible for😭

[@bubbles9160]

oh my goodness. okay so my family is a pretty basic mexican family, but my grandpa is just an absolute baby in uniform. the second he’s home from work it’s “where’s my drink ?? what’s for lunch ?? put my phone to charge. why’s the couch not made??” and he just will NOT move from the couch. he has a specific seat at the table and the one time i wanted to sit there as a child he pulled me off by my ear !! no one sits in his seat now, but everything has to be done for him. i cant understand how my grandma has been putting up with it for so long…

[@PorkSzoda]

About a month ago after me doing all of our collective laundry since i moved in with him, my fiance OFFERED to fold it for me while i was away visiting family. Came home to my things stuffed into drawers while his were neatly folded. I took a deep breath and told him we would both be doing our own laundry from now on. I asked him why?! Why on earth?! Why just mine?? And he said he got overwhelmed. Dude I do that same amount of laundry every single week, sometimes multiple times a week. You couldve just folded it and left it for me to put away. I wouldve been happy with that. Needless to say ive been more touchy about distribution of chores lately.

[@GabrielleTollerson]

Massive red flags right there!

[@toxiczombiewolf5692]

Overwhelmed folding fucking clothes is he 5? Girl you deserve someone who doesn't act that lazy and immature I hope he improves his behavior

[@captainngoose]

Overwhelmed by folding laundry lmfao? He's not 5

[@tiahnarodriguez3809]

I lived with very toxic roommates who hated my guts, but long story short they folded my clothes for me and put them neatly on my bed while I was out of town, so if they could fold my laundry a person who is supposed to love me has no excuse.

[@JP-sx7fq]

You need to ask yourself if you want a lifetime of this nonsense. They get worse after marriage. Whatever bs they pull while dating, it will be infinitely worse.

[@mushroomsandfrogs]

My brother (13, YES 13) cannot even vacuum a floor properly. He doesn't even know the difference between my shirt and my four year old sister's shirt. He doesn't know how to dry a dish or wash them. He can't fold towels or clean the sink. He seems to do all this just so he has the short tasks in the house. I can do every household chore except shampoo the couch. I'm not much older than him either.

[@Picklemick33]

"I leave the door open when I take a little pee, and you don't know how to spell my name???" Has me wheezing over here

[@MonsterBlush]

I left to visit my little sister for almost 2 weeks and when I came home my now exhusband had done nothing. Trash from when I left was still in the kitchen like pizza boxes from the night before I left. There was fast food trash all over the dining room and kitchen, piles of dishes, laundry untouched, etc. He expected me to come home after a 12 hour drive and clean up after him. One of the many reasons I divorced him.