What Happens Next? | Chosen Family Podcast

This week, Mom and Dad do their best to support Mak as she anxiously anticipates her first pap. Additionally, the fam discuss the next emotional steps in their careers and how they feel about the podcast now that it's fully up and running. What happens next? Find out this week on Chosen Family!
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[@FarronMoon]

Alayna has never sounded so much like a therapist than when she said "We've touched on this". I actually got happy therapy flashbacks from that phrasing.

[@lc360]

let's unpack that

[@jessicahernandez3090]

What did Alayna studied tho? Because she has always resembled a therapist to me

[@noemiedepatie3987]

@@jessicahernandez3090 shes doing her degree for psychology rn i think! Or something like that

[@prozierozie5692]

​@@jessicahernandez3090 She really would make an amazing therapist

[@chummy9396]

@@2nd3rd1st 27:26 oh really 😏😏

[@tayto139]

I recently discovered that I suffer from vaginismus (aka "super tight pussy disease" lmao) and it's actually because of past OBGYN trauma. Thus, it took me SO long to find a queer-friendly, compassionate, empathetic doctor and actually book an appointment with her. But I finally booked it for last November-- she was so kind, listened to all of my concerns, and told me everything she was about to do before doing it. Because of the trauma I shared with her, she had her assistant stay in the room with my consent, and the assistant even offered to stand next to me and hold my hand. Before even trying to insert a finger, let alone a speculum, she inserted a cotton swab. She asked me if I felt ANY sort of pain, and when I said yes, she said "Okay, that's it. We are done for today. I'm going to refer you to pelvic floor physical therapy". I've been in PT ever since, and next Monday is my last appointment because I've made SO much progress! Pelvic floor PT has changed my life, and I no longer feel pain when inserting anything as small as a cotton swab, tampon, finger, etc. I've been slowly working my way up a set of dilators, and I'm almost able to use the largest size. Once I can do that, I believe I should be able to go back and get a full pap smear without any issues! I never thought I was EVER going to be able to that, but here I am and it's only 4 months later 😄 TLDR; vaginismus sucks and any pain when inserting something into your vagina is the worst, but you've got this Mak!!! YOU CAN DO IT 💖💪

[@ashgavs]

For those with pain: read this!

[@rheron3312]

Pelvic floor physio can be life-changing, and it's probably needed in anyone with endo, pelvic pain, or even trauma histories may want to consider it.

[@cleosworld9096]

Omg I love u sharing this. I do not have this but I know ppl who do. This is more common than u think. Also I’m so so sorry for ur past trauma. And I’m so happy u r almost ready to get a regular papsmear. That is so great for u. Also if u r wanting a sexual relationship then u will be able to do things u thought u never could if that’s wat u want to. I’m just so happy for u like a mother is for their child and I don’t even know u. Hooray for u

[@EmSamO]

Damn…TIL this is a thing and I think I have it. I’m almost 28 and have never had a pap because of a bad OBGYN experience in college. The pain, etc you described sounds just like what happens to me and I always assumed that’s just how I am and there’s nothing I can do about it. But reading your story gives me hope, thank you for sharing it!

[@tayto139]

@@EmSamO I’m so sorry you’ve also had bad OBGYN experiences- and I used to think I was always gonna be this way too, but pelvic floor PT seriously changed my life and I can’t recommend it enough 💖

[@katnissgayverdeen]

Dear chosen family, I’m 26, been avoiding my smear for a year now because of the same fears Mak has. I got an automated text a couple days ago from my doctor reminding me to book it. If it wasn’t for hearing this podcast this morning and taking it as a sign to BOOK MY PAP SMEAR I probably wouldn’t ever go. So thank you. Now hopefully I don’t chicken out 😅

[@brennapiersma6747]

You've got this! So proud of you for taking the leap and booking it!

[@katnissgayverdeen]

@@brennapiersma6747 thank you 🫶💕

[@cariiinen]

Great! You're taking care of yourself and that is so important! Good luck.

[@cariiinen]

Adding a smiley face to make sure you know my "good luck! :)" is genuine and friendly

[@spriddlez]

You can do it! You face the world every day as a person with a cervix. If it's gunna cause you all that trouble you may as well get it checked out ;)

[@Neveko]

Alayna hits Ashley right in the throat while she's being vulnerable and I'm so proud of both of them 🥹

[@jasonwalker4003]

Proud of Ashley for opening up and being vulnerable and proud of Alayna for sensing that vulnerability and going straight for the kill

[@Kvbain1967]

41:51 for anyone who wants to get to this part first

[@bobhendricks4024]

Yes, straight people are among you! Older southern white straight male to be exact. I did start watching this podcast to help me understand a new aspect of my dear gay niece. I stayed for the humor and wonderful discussion of interesting people. What a wonderful, thoughtful show! You each are so talented and such wonderful people and help so many people. I hope you each find the meaning you need from your creative efforts! Ashly, you should try Zen Mind, Beginners Mind by D.T. Suzuki

[@suzy3899]

Bob this is the sweetest thing ever. You are a gem of a human ❤

[@bobhendricks4024]

@@suzy3899 thank you so much for your kind words! I very much appreciate them.

[@brennabreithaupt4224]

This brings me so much joy and faith in humanity. You’re an awesome uncle Bob ❤

[@TheSarahmmkk]

Alright, that’s it. Bob is OUR uncle now 🥹🥰

[@raymitts7698]

tears in my eyes bob, tears in my eyes

[@sublene333]

ashley being aggressively supportive is everything

[@kateo5846]

It's so beautiful to see this kind of deep friendship and mentorship between all three of these Friendly Lesbians. Also please make the Tell Her She's Cute merch so we can give you more $$$

[@kapowjam3462]

I want a Tell Her She's Cute shirt! Or a Tell Them Their Cute shirt!

[@AnimaLiberationist]

​​@@kapowjam3462 them they're* and I'd love this too

[@agatheblanckaert4686]

Such a good idea also for people like me who want to support such an amazing project but can't give monthly!

[@siamesefightingfish2861]

​@@kapowjam3462her shirt is cute

[@FZ-bk9kh]

Med student here! The 'super tight pussy disease' that Ashley is jokingly referring to at 15:25 is called Vaginismus Actually fairly common, can lead to pain and spasm during sex. Often linked to past sexual trauma and/or infections like thrush. If someone has it they need to let their doctor know before a pap smear is done so that they take necessary precautions

[@cael_aj]

I think I might have it because I've tried to get a pap smear a few times and it was always so painful that we had to stop. But my doctor said I couldn't have vaginismus because I'm able to use tampons. And she didn't offer any kind of precautions or alternatives, so now I'm about to turn 26 and I still haven't had one. What precautions can they take?

[@sampsonspadafore]

I have told all of the gyno’s I’ve been to that an exam is extremely painful to me and they never do anything differently. I haven’t gotten an exam in probably 4 years or more at this point because of it

[@brennapiersma6747]

To anybody whose OB is gaslighting them about this pain, a pelvic floor PT can help with this diagnosis/expected diagnosis as well - so glad there is a med student in the chat to be able to advocate for this common issue that isn't talked about enough!

[@sashashashashaaa]

This KZbin comment was wildly comforting, thank you for sharing

[@shravyashetty3491]

Any diy remedies for this? I've been using pads my whole life... Virgin... I invested in the smallest size of menstrual cup, but just can't get it in for the life of... And the tiny part that's in hurts soooooo bad...

[@FATIMA-tq8ec]

Loving the extra 10 mins we got honestly why can’t these episodes be like 2 hrs

[@kemizehabib-mohammed8791]

I like wishing that I could get more at the end of each episode; it makes me look forward to the next week. 2 hours would realistically be too much 😂

[@merokosama]

WORD I could listen to this all day long 😭😭

[@user-xg8qj4nz2h]

Ashley should start doing Cameos where she just yells motivation at people. I know I would definitely buy that.

[@TheCankleBandit]

not me crying every time I hear Ashley's voice crack before she cries. This was such a great and informative episode. Hoping Mak gets her Pap (it's really not bad, a paper cut with hand sanitizer is worse than a pap). I love how yall are fans of each other and help each other grow

[@isobelwhitehouse4459]

Why do the topics of conversation on these episodes always come at the right time? Literally the therapy session I didn't know I needed 😢❤

[@emjaysankofa]

Word! Completely agree

[@stephaniehawkins4047]

Literally! I JUST had my annual yesterday and it had been a while…..The doctor thing is soooooo scary sometimes. It’s also just intimidating with how many specialists you have to find for every t different health thing.

[@stephaniehawkins4047]

Another reason I love listening to this podcast as a woman in a hetero relationship.

[@Lovely-ry9do]

Same here 🙋🏼‍♀️ I moved here from Europe and I'm so scared to go to the doctor here, especially gyno.. I don't know how to find the right one for me, so this episode is scarily perfect for me right now 😂

[@ishapurandare5685]

I need someone in my life to yell-motivate at me like Ashley does.

[@calipo97979797]

I've never been this early. Just woke up (I'm from Germany) and clicked on the video. I'm not even completely awake 😂.

[@fionag7589]

Same😂

[@JuMixBoox]

Saame.

[@natkastoowska9875]

Same, I'm from Poland 🙈 Hi neighbor

[@jessicahernandez3090]

same!! but in Italy😂

[@nikkidl13]

Netherlands hi 👋

[@jessica_belmont]

Endometriosis/Pelvic floor dysfunction sufferer here! Pap smears suck for me, but finding the right doctor is *key.* My doctor will bring in her assistant, who holds my hand. It's still very quick, and as painful as it is, it's still not something I'd skip. Please book your appointments! My mother passed from cervical cancer and never went to doctors. So, it's so worth going, even when it's scary.

[@ashgavs]

Thank you for sharing this. Can we pin it?

[@jessica_belmont]

@@ashgavs Absolutely! ☺️

[@marycopper4463]

This is a part of my wendsday morning routine and it makes all the midweek bullshit toleratabable. Thank you for that!

[@ZestonN]

This and The Mandalorian is my whole Wednesday. 😁

[@rosetehrani6502]

Ashley being Mak's and Alayna's hype person is sending me!! so much love :)

[@sarahm7086]

So cute and funny how Mak continued to say schmear during this

[@sammybecause06]

"have you ever caught a nail" my whole body physically cringed in pain PLEASE ashley 😭😭😭

[@blakemtg47]

The three of you bounce of each other so well. Umami of podcasters

[@emjaysankofa]

I’m dead 💀 that’s hilarious! Completely agree!!!

[@FellowDayer96]

Man, they talking about the pap smear made me think of my GF, I'm a trans guy and never in my 26 years of walking this life had I ever gone to a Gyno appointment, In walks my GF telling me somethings are not normal and like an Angel calls the doctor office and makes an appointment for me, holds my hand in the waiting room and helps me calm myself before the appointment, the support when doing this kind of thinks is so needed.

[@krissicarsonart]

I just want to say to Alayna that your audience is also growing older and making career changes and other life changes. One of the things I've really enjoyed as I've watched some KZbinrs for a few years now is watching people evolve. Don't get yourself stuck because you're afraid. No one gets to the end of their life and says, "I'm glad I played it safe." Take the risk. We'll go with you wherever you go because we genuinely enjoy listening to you.

[@zoerphl]

mak the schmear really isn't bad at all once you're there. you're a big boi & we believe in ur health

[@Andrea-bv4ep]

So I was exactly like Mak for a LONG TIME. I was terrified of being touched by the OBGYN. It wasn't due to any significant medical trauma. What I didn't know then was that I am asexual and everything surrounding sex and stuff was a general ew and I did not want any of it. So between the time I was 16 until I was 23, I declined an internal exam and pap smears. I let them do breast exams around 20 years old. That feels just like a pretty nice massage. Thankfully, since I'm not sexually active, it wasn't an issue, but once I found the doctor I liked and I grew to know her, I opened up about being asexual and she completely understood and asked me to just think on it, since it is important for my health. Later in my college years, when I went in for my yearly exam with her, I consented. She knew how uncomfortable I was and talked me through it. It wasn't as quick as I would have liked and it was uncomfortable and a little painful, mostly because I was tense and nervous. But we got it over with. Since I'm not sexually active I don't have to get paps done every year. I can defer to doing it every 3-5 years. When I go in the years between, I just get an internal exam which is not uncomfortable at all and a breast exam. So Mak, I've been there. I know what you are feeling and its okay to feel like that. Find a doctor who understands. Have several meetings with them if you need to get to know them first. Bring a support person if you need to. Try to relax during the smear as best you can, talk during it, it helps take your mind off of it. This is for your ultimate health and well-being and it'll all be okay. You got this!

[@hfoorss13]

In Sweden we get sent kits to do our own Pap smears! They test for HPV, and if it comes back positive you have to go in and get a proper one done :)

[@Emmsley14]

Omg that actually sounds really cool! I feel like that would make people so more comfortable with it!

[@Popopatop]

Omg of course they do. Sweden does a lot of things in great ways.

[@rheron3312]

If that was an option for me, I would actually do it. I hear Australia has this option too

[@mjp7496]

Oh my god, I wish we could do that in the US!

[@sushi_girl4768]

I actually noticed and laughed a little too hard when Ashley sipped from the microphone

[@erwane.106]

Ashley's advices on this are so good. Ashley, you have a way of explaining and putting things into words that is phenomenal. The way you talked about your jokes and how you want to be friends with them again is such a beautiful and clear metaphor. You always have such an analytical point of view on everything you do but you also explain it in a beautiful and very clear way, always.

[@autumnguthrie3177]

Ashley is so incredibly smart in so many ways. I admire her SO much. Anyone who has her in their life is super lucky.

[@ashgavs]

Wow thank you so much. This really means a lot to me as a writer and a performing artist

[@gracelarmee]

Right!!!!!?!?!? Like everything Ashley says (especially in this episode) is said so eloquently and really connects with others in a deep way and it feels like she completely understands how you feel and helps put things into those words to help you realize exactly what you are feeling

[@Anne-si1kb]

I wanna be friends with my passion too. Funny how Ash saying she’s not gonna be relatable, was the most relatable thing this episode to me. ❤

[@cael_aj]

Yeah, it reminded me of my relationship with my writing and how it's taken me years to figure out how to prioritize it without putting so much pressure on myself to write that it's no longer fun.

[@LamAnopro_]

What have you been writing?

[@cael_aj]

@@LamAnopro_ I've been working on a fantasy series on and off for almost 10 years now, since I was 16. I've completely rewritten it multiple times as I've learned more about life, myself, and writing, but there was about a 3 year period where I couldn't work on it at all because I was so burnt out on it and trying so hard to make it perfect. Now that I'm back writing it again, I'm being really careful with how I think about writing, making sure that I'm not putting any pressure on myself to make it perfect in the first draft or to write a certain amount of words a day or anything like that. I've been writing since I was 6 so it was really painful in that 3 year period where I couldn't write much of anything. It felt like I had lost a friend, kind of like what Ashley said. So now that I'm writing again, I'm making sure to give myself credit for any and all writing I do.

[@tivicerush4921]

Omg Ashley! You had me in tears because you are one of the biggest somebodies. So much that a couple of my roller derby teammates and I are planning to travel to TN from Atlanta just to see YOU do standup. Ashley you are a star ⭐️. Never question that.

[@musiclover191]

The way they all show off their imposter syndrome to each other as they talk about how they felt at the beginning of starting this podcast together is too relatable. God this is healing?!

[@dannieden5049]

I adore this episode, this podcast and the entire Chosen Family. You all were in sync from the wardrobe to the vulnerability and pull toward growth and passion. I feel like this wasn't a dinner , more like a family photo. A moment to look back at, in the future to remember where you were before the next leap.

[@themorales6]

The reaction to “catching a nail” had me ROLLING!!!!😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@akaricarty2241]

getting an actual birthday present ❌ getting a new chosen family pod video because my birthdays on Wednesday ✔ but genuinely this podcast has help me so much i cannot explain it, thank all three of you for being open and making a chosen family its helped way more than i thought a podcast ever could. This podcast is also giving me great topics to talk about with my therapist 😂 edit: THANK YOU FOR ALL THE BIRTHDAY WISHES 💕

[@MOMOD854]

Happy birthday!

[@akaricarty2241]

@@MOMOD854 thank u!!

[@alternativelyabled3757]

Same! And Happy Birthday!

[@Kassandra_Karma]

Happy birthday!!!!

[@madison28R]

Itssssss yo birthday! sending the loves

[@FinallyBeingMyself]

I have a lot of trauma and getting a Pap smear is something I honestly never planned on doing. Laying there and having someone put something in me has been a solid “no” all along. I turned 33 last month, and I got my first Pap smear ever 6 days before my birthday. Breast exam, pelvic exam, and Pap smear. I go to Planned Parenthood and they’re genuinely the best people ever that work there, and that’s what made it okay. Well, okay-ish. I was still very anxious and there was a moment that I was really kinda panicking, and the NP calmed me so easily. It was weird. It was definitely weird. But she told me everything she was doing and it didn’t take long at all! Thankfully everything came back normal, but it’s still an anxiety inducing experience. It’s not nearly as bad as we make it seem in our own minds. You’ll be okay, Mak 💜

[@NotCheyenne]

This podcast is an advice podcast, even though you didn't get to any questions, this episode is definitely one of my favourites! The advice was all still there, I still feel supported and motivated, absolutely awesome conversations!!

[@kaylynngraham1056]

I love how they can cry/tear up and it’s perfectly normal❤

[@Zarsu470]

Mak, i got my first pap smear when i was 30, so i absolutely get it. Ask to have a woman doing it, to bring someone with you. Ask for all the things. But i do have to say, after the first 2 times, it gets WAY easier. But keep asking for what you need to be comf. Maybe even do a meeting before where they go over with you about everything that will be happening and then do the pap another day. Love you all!

[@nikkidl13]

Jesus Christ, ASHLEY you just, that peptalk did it for me, and then you got emotional, and I just started balling. All of that spoke to me so much. Thank you ♡ I've been struggling with expressing myself and my thoughts and feelings about stuff, just thinking no one wants to hear this from me. And Alayna, just the story of how you started your youtube channel is such a lifehack I might actually do something similar to get started with stuff.

[@katiebear877]

still waiting for that "tell her she's cute" "tell them they're cute" merch hahaha i would totally buy

[@_asantesana_squashbanana_]

My adhd ass is suprisingly early. Ready for this mood changer/stabiliser lol this podcast makes me feel like part of a gay group of friends/lesbian community, all the way out here, rural country Australia. Thanks Chosen Family 💙

[@XiONtv]

Pap schmeer got me in stitches😂

[@euryalewho]

If I had a dollar for every time I've cried listening to this podcast, I'd have at least 5 dollars. I love this friendship and this podcast. Y'all are tsars of content I'm so proud to be a listener ❤

[@jesssvaladez]

“sometimes you catch a nail!” 😩😂💅🏼

[@Lexi-mx5cm]

I love it when they are funny and rapid fire cracking jokes but I also love how comfortably they share their most vulnerable thoughts and feelings and this podcast honestly is just such a safe space especially as a queer person and I feel like I’ve never had something like it and I’m so great full for them and all that they have done on here so far❤

[@Fbaker04330]

Alayna, your loyal subscribers won't go anywhere. Don't worry about us. Just follow whatever you want to do.

[@chiaramessorio]

the vulnerability you showed, the vibes you sent, the way you supported each other...this has to be one one of my favourite episodes so far. And to hear you speak so profoundly sincerely about your passions and insecurities is so inspiring. As someone who has been a fan of all of your work for almost a year I genuinely feel like no matter how many steps back you took, if you're doing it to invest in yourself it's only worth it. And it really also feels very encouraging. Don't know if I'll finally have the courage to get our there in the world, but I really hope at some point I'll start trying. So yeah, thank you!

[@hannaheiserman1632]

Not even Ashley gave “pap schmear” the attention it deserved. Holy fuck, I can’t stop laughing. 😭😭😭

[@jessiedickerson4555]

You were all talking about the smear process and then your advertisement for ZocDoc came on and I thought all of a sudden you guys were going into very precise detail about where Mak could go to make an appointment 😂

[@cariiinen]

Alayna: go for it, do your thing! Doing what you're passionate about, you will shine and that will illuminate your path in a whole new way! And we WILL follow you

[@angelmccarthy559]

In Ireland we don’t need smears until 25! To say I’m great full I’ve had experience in gynaecology and now know what a smear is I feel so relaxed about getting one. Also you should absolutely be allowed ask for a chaperon with any medical exam!!

[@freedomastrology6567]

It was the new moon yesterday ! I believe in you all and I’m putting it out there your intentions will manifest a way that will brings you each joy, peace and emotional fulfillment 💗🙏🏼 Lots of love !

[@VictorVonGrooove]

I think there's 8 stages of Pod instead of grief. I fucking love you guys in how true you are with your emotions.

[@heathermcneelyy]

I literally hate all of you you're all ridiculously genuine, kind, humble human beings. Also anyone else sobbing at 42:00 and then laughing their ass off at 42:31 bc Alayna just full on ruined the moment?

[@mrfredbasset]

13:07 hearing Ashley talk about a man being cool is actually so helpful. In my town we only have men (you also can’t go out of certain borders for things. You have to do it in your jurisdiction) and that’s what’s been making me be so nervous to go. I know you shouldn’t listen to TikTok but seeing so many people talk about their bad experiences with the male doctors has made me more nervous

[@emjaysankofa]

I have had actually mostly had male OBs (just by coincidence not purposely) and I have found they are actually often more calm, gentle, and communicative. Not sure why…I attribute it to them not knowing how it feels so they err on the more gentle approach🤷🏽‍♀️ doesn’t matter why, but that’s my experience least (for what it’s worth) good luck and I’m wishing you well. 😊

[@mrfredbasset]

@@emjaysankofa that’s good to know. Thank you for sharing! It makes me feel a lot better about it

[@ashgavs]

There are a ton of issues due to men in the medical field, but it shouldn’t prevent you from trying a doctor. You can stop seeing them at any time (even during the appointment). You can always get a second opinion.

[@ragreen2]

I'm not crying 😢 ... you guys are crying 🥹 ... #wearecrying #tearsofsupport

[@Aquanaba]

I went to the gyno for the first time at 30 (like Mak I was raised in a "you can take care of everything naturally" situation which often dissuades me seeking legitimate doctors, I have trauma, general anxiety about a stranger being in there, every well-recommended doctor in the area was a man and that was a hard no.... you get it.) The doctor I ended up finding, as it turned out, was trauma informed and she and her nurse were incredible. They walked me through the whole process beforehand, they raised up the bed instead of having me go into stirrups. It was Not Bad At All, and I'm so glad I ticked it off my list, and set up my return appointments. Did I love it? No. It's not "comfy." BUT. I had built it up a lot, and there is a relief in just having done it and knowing what there was to know, as opposed to the constant undercurrent of "I wonder if something is wrong. If I go they may tell me something is wrong. If I don't go I don't have to know... but I will wonder." (I also scheduled it in tandem with a dentist appointment I was overdue for, which meant I got to make a lot of "It's a top to toe orifice day" jokes.)

[@coleydotmp4]

Thank you, seriously, for being pro pap smear and demystifying it. My mom died of cervical cancer, and I truly believe its because she put off getting a pap for 5 years. When they caught the cancer (cervical is super treatable in early stages!) it had progressed so far that she had a small chance of living. Had she caught it earlier, I can't help but wonder if she'd still be here. I've seen WAY too many people on tiktok opt out of them because of the fear mongering, or they heard someone had a bad male doctor who made it uncomfortable, etc. etc. There are valid reasons to be apprehensive about getting one, but goddam people. Stop being chronically online and get your damn pap smear!

[@coleydotmp4]

^^ I want to add that 2 of my friends, around my age (24-26), have caught precancerous cells via pap smear since hearing my mom's story. Another friend, 19yrs old, caught STAGE 3 OVARIAN at the gyno when she had symptoms but pap came out normal (pap doesnt detect ovarian). PLEASE. Take care of yourselves. be brave, like ashley said, its like sleeping with a femme and catching a nail. Its NOT that bad. Get a new doc if it's painful.

[@kaelineckels763]

I find it fascinating that some families would ever raise their children with fear in their hearts towards something like medical care. It's terrible and sets them up for failure later on. So happy Mak has a support system like this now❤

[@LinnySays]

I just got fired because the recession has hit my line of work hard. But this episode really solidified the intention I already have for myself: to finish my book. Sometimes the scariest moments in your life make room for what you really want to do deep down in your heart.

[@Shoot4AlarmFire]

Good luck! You got this!!

[@katrobinson5167]

Fuck I never thought Ashley's voice cracks would make me cry instead of think of a pubescent boy🥹 love and appreciate you 3 as your genuine selves so much

[@nikkidl13]

My new moon intention is less doomscrolling, more time for myself and my own thoughts. Making my life interesting again and focusing on getting more energised. I want to go out and do stuff again but also value my alone time like I used to.

[@addie1080]

the supportive aggression from ashley is hilarious!

[@mariameunome]

THAT SPONSORSHIP WAS SMOOOOOTH

[@cristophersebastianrabanal509]

I know it will sound a little dumb and everything but personally I never had a good relationship with my family and I've always felt like a stranger aground my dinner table but really, even though is accross the phone listening to this podcast has helped me a lot going through the rough patches in my life so what I'm trying to say is thank you for allowing me to be a part of this beautiful chosen family :3

[@aquamarine3699]

1000% agree with Ashley. If you ever decide to take a step back from youtube, we are not going anywhere

[@teresaoleagonzalez9926]

New moon intentions: 1) make space to becoming a better learner so I feel like graduating with bachelor's is not just a bullet point off my life's checklist but instead a transformational process 2) make friends by doing things I've always wanted to do like rock climbing and martial arts 3) find and create comfort in all the spaces I inhabit Love this ep, thanks y'all

[@Blubberblase7]

as someone who does experience pap smears as very painful, I can tell you Mak, it is doable. I do have some physical trauma in that area, so I´m extremly sensitive to everything there. I handle it like I do with the dentist. I look away, focus on breathing and try not to cry. The good thing is, the pap does take just a couple of seconds and many docs are super gentle when you tell them that you´re afraid. You can do it ! : )

[@GrapefruitCat2]

God this episode was emotional rollercoaster I wasn’t expecting to hear how grateful y’all all are for each other and the podcast. This makes me so excited for what’s to come; THIS IS MY NEW FAV PODCAST!!!!!(after ladies and tangents and the sesh)

[@mininjas]

I'm trying to listen while working but Ashley saying, "sometimes you catch a nail" and then cracking up is killing me

[@angiemurray4458]

This Chosen Family was an episode of “Father Knows Best”.

[@nicolewebb1649]

In Australia they’ve just started giving the option of self testing for paps. You go to the doctors, they give you the kit and explain it then leave you to it. It is basically just a swizzle stick not the full cervix scrape. It only tests for HPV not the full spectrum of tests and can only be done if you have no symptoms but is meant as at least a stepping stone screening test for people who otherwise would totally avoid testing and potentially end up with a very advanced cancer before they realised.

[@gabibrito]

can we, as Brazilians, take a pause to appreciate Ashley speaking so fondly of the alchemist? i know our intelectual culture is really worshiped around the world, but we, as a society, tend to not do the same. if you didn't read this book, you should, it's a national treasure.

[@celinears]

Ashley was so inspirational in this episode

[@melissaeastridge7402]

Hahaha I thought the same thing Ashley thought when Mak said “it won’t be a boy right?” 😂😂😂

[@realdirtbagOG]

Alayna!!! No matter where you go, with or without KZbin, you’ll always have my support! I adore you and you have been so important to me while I’ve been stepping into my queerness. I hope you do the things you want to do because I want you to be happy! I really appreciate you starting this new adventure with the podcast, and it is such a good look on you to see you trying new things ❤❤❤❤

[@marialuizamenezes3115]

how can each episode be more special than the previous one? I cant stop crying about how much i love all of you and how incredible you are. individually you were already my faves from the internet. you three together make me so so so happy. I hope we can choose to be a family together for a veeeeeery long time.

[@izzy7159]

Intention: make mindful choices on what I agree to. If I say yes to everything, I lose out on the things that truly bring me joy.

[@carolinemiller2737]

Just found this podcast this week. Have literally binge watched/listened to all 22 this week. I've always identified as bisexual, but married my highschool boyfriend.. and recently separated. This has been super educational for me as im a little scared of starting my first real dating experiences in my 30s. I love this new chosen family.

[@ryanflake3481]

It is just one voice here, but after hearing Ashley's comments it should be said.... I came here because I followed her. From clips of her Stand Up to finding this and these other two awesome ladies. Every one of you is bringing people into the audience, none of you are small fries.

[@Mariethechaotic]

Alayna, as someone who has been watching you since your second year and being a Patron for the last 3 years I will 100% still continue to support you in whatever you do. I am so proud of you even though we've never met. You're not letting us down, no matter what you do. I'm glad your fire is the podcast because while I say that and mean that, I really am glad to hear that the podcast is the thing you're not considering stepping back from....I obviously love your KZbin channel but I have found myself looking forward to these ones even more. I do hope you keep those Boog pins coming though, because I do genuinely love them, especially the pride one from last year.

[@lovestruck90]

Ashley, totally agree on the male gyno! My first gyno was the guy my sister saw that delivered her daughter, and I loved him because he was so funny and kept things light! He was so sad when I moved specifically because he wasn't going to be able to deliver my babies

[@yellow6409]

42:30 alayna fucking nailed it, i was so not expecting that, what a legendary moment

[@elizabethpadmore850]

I found Mak on TikTok and discovered her channel on here when I decided to delete TikTok, and that has led me to your guys' lovely community on here that makes me feel so seen and recognized. You can definitely tell when a creator is passionate about their craft, and I can feel that here. Thank you for everything you guys do ♥️

[@AlaniSugar]

I'm okay with this just being a hanging out podcast, with an occasional quiet ever few episodes ❤ we love hanging out at the dinner table with you guys!

[@SpringTheFiberEnthusiast]

Thank you all for touching on this subject!! I had endometriosis and had to have a complete hysterectomy. Four pound mass of all my female organs. Thankfully it was only on those organs and not elsewhere! Paps are important!

[@marliesd5830]

Okay somehow I started of this week with realizing "oh wait this year I will definitely have a first pap smear appointment", then yesterday I saw a bit of a comdy routine also about pap smears, and then today this episode drops, also about pap smears. It's one big coincidence but still, damn. Also, in the comedy bit the woman was like "somehow there's always a trainee doctor when I have to get my test", and then Alayna mentioned that she has that too. It's a real phenomenon I guess

[@diannaw3034]

I have type 2 diabetes.. and my medication for my condition causes me to be soooooooo damn sensitive down there. Well .. that means for me my pap smears are painful.. however not as painful as Cancer... so I force myself to get them done anyways.. for prevention!!! The pain lasts only seconds.. and then I at least can be confident in knowing I am Cancer free... and if I ever got a positive result.. it would be caught early and I could get it dealt with immediately!! That's a good trade off!!! Mak ... get the damn test done already!!!! You matter and your health matters.. annnnd it's way too important not to get it done!!! Love yourself enough to push through it!! You got this!!!!!

[@mariannetfinches]

Yes! Exactly this! I once had a minor additional procedure & I am soooo glad I didn't have to have anything more invasive, which might have happened if I had put it off & it had progressed.

[@Oxahna]

"What the fuck was this episode?" Pure love, and I'm here for it 🥰

[@8infinite8possiblities8]

I love how your personalities are rubbing off on each other in the best way!🤣🤣🤣

[@juliasprocatti7050]

Okay, I used to be super afraid of going to the gynecologist, so I never went, until I felt a horrible pain in my lower back and had to go to the hospital for it. Turns out I had a huge teratoma and had to take out both of my ovaries, now I'm really struggling so... get checked out please.

[@kristinh4686]

Mak, I'm 32 and just had my first pap smear last month! Details aside, I basically was nervous for a long time bc I had a rather traumatic experience in the ER several years ago. I told my doctor about it and she was super understanding, and talked me through everything. Just remember to take deep breaths if you feel yourself getting nervous. It helped me stay calm and relax my muscles. You got this!

[@coastalcassi]

Intentions - Following and trusting my heart and the space I make for it. Since 2018 I feel like I have been on this treadmill of trying to reach goals society and others have set for me. 6 months ago I set a REALLY hard goal of listening to MYSELF and allowing myself to take up space. I want to take up space and feel good about what I’m doing.

[@bythewater1963]

I’ve been watching this podcast since episode one and didn’t realize I had missed this episode until today. Holy crap such a special flashback, I’m so happy to see how far you all have come since this point and damn was Alayna right on in saying this podcast would mark the beginning to a new season for each of you! Ashley’s got Jen, Mak is FINALLY in her LA apartment with her girlfriend and Alayna got into the competitive Masters program. I hope y’all see this comment so you can maybe look back and appreciate just how much you’ve grown. I truly look up to you all so so much 💛

[@JP_doesitall]

Ashley out of absolutely nowhere: “Let’s set some intentions for the new moon.” Me and Mac at the same time: 😶

[@zehnerka]

Hi! Not Pap smear related but my Gyno found a lump in my breast during the breast exam and said I needed to get a mammogram and ultrasound because they were nervous about it, it ended up being cancer. Needless to say the Gyno and Pap smears are very important! I’ve never liked the doctor either but had I waited any longer who knows what the outcome could have been and now I’m cancer free! You’ll feel much better with peace of mind once you go!

[@palmtreesdude]

Actually listened on Spotify but came here just to leave a like so Mak will get her pap smear ☝

[@claraboe2755]

Lol im a med student currently in gynecology practice so ive been the weird second person in the room ^^ sometimes i even did the exam myself. And i have to say the gynecology center where im at has the nicest personal ive ever worked with - idk if you can generalise this but maybe its something about it being mainly women caring for women or idk. Theyre definitely very gentle and very aware of how intimate and vulnerable that stuff is and try to make everyone feel safe

[@ariadnarivas260]

I wasn't expecting to cry on this episode. When Ashley started to cry, I immediately cried as well. I love this episode so much. You're so special to me. I think I'm emotionally attached to your podcast. Today, I was feeling like craving interaction of some sort. With you, I feel at ease. Thank you so much.

[@bethandickenson5801]

I skipped my Pap this past year because they wanted me to do it without giving me a heads up that it was going to happen at all, and it was extremely painful the first time. But I think that if I wasn’t as scared the year before getting it, it would not have been so painful. Listening to this on my way to work at 6 AM. I’ve already texted my husband to ask him to come with me next time so I can get my Pap smear. 😂

[@carterpeele4913]

I love that I found Ashley through her stand up and loved her because of how "harsh" her comedy is and now I've found this podcast and I've loved watching her be so vulnerable and emotional and real. It's so refreshing to see someone who seems to have such a tough exterior get emotional in the way she has. I love seeing it 🥰