what it's like to be an Asian American woman | the ugly truth

thank you for tuning in to 22 minutes straight of me putting society on blast :-)
@ my fellow Asian-Americans: stay strong and please continue to stay safe 💛
@ everyone else: please stand with us in the fight against anti-Asian racism. Below you can find links on how you can do your part.
RECOGNIZE YOUR PRIVILEGE
→Check-Your Privilege Self-Assessment www.psychologytoday.com/ca/bl...
EDUCATE
→Comprehensive resource on anti-Asian violence anti-asianviolenceresources.c...
→History of the Fetishization of Asian Women www.bitchmedia.org/article/th...
www.vox.com/22338807/asian-fe...
www.npr.org/2021/03/19/979336...
DONATE
→stopaapihate.org/
→hateisavirus.org/
→GoFundMe for Hyung Jung Kim (victim of Georgia shooting) gofund.me/6653b648​
→GoFundMe for Elderly Asian Woman assaulted in San Francisco gofund.me/d4977bce
📱 LET'S CONNECT
Instagram - / audreykao
🎵 MUSIC
Epidemic Sound
#stopasianhate #stopaapihate #hateisavirus
Chapters:
0:00 Intro
2:40 The School Years
3:40 The University Years
7:06 Dating as an Asian-American Woman
8:24 Breaking Down the Asian Fetish
14:06 How to Avoid Yellow Fevered Men
16:47 The Hate Crime in Atlanta
20:09 How to Make a Difference

[@korra999c7]

Thank you for this video! I’m loving the fact that more and more asians are talking about topics like racial gaslighting and Asian fetishization. Especially fetishization. The more we’re aware of it, the better we are at avoiding those certain creepy guys.

[@fromaudreykao]

thank you for watching! gotta look out for each other 💁🏻‍♀️

[@user-ci7vu7eo9w]

You stop fetishize white people

[@weskirkland5850]

fetishization is a solely western idea. its complete bullshit for 95% of the guys you accuse of this. let it go. If a man loves you and takes care of you and treats you with respect whats your problem? listening to these ideas will make you an old lady alone and sad.

[@korra999c7]

@@weskirkland5850 fetishization in the context of this video is based on the lived experiences of many Asian women from the west and in asia, throughout a few generations by now. If a non-Asian simply finds an Asian woman attractive, then that’s fine. I’m not talking about that. But there are many cases where it crosses the line into racial objectification coupled with misogyny, and the experience feels very dehumanizing. Again, these are based on our lived experiences, where we can and do differentiate the nuances on a regular basis. It’s ok if you don’t see the nuances due to not having the same lived experience, but please don’t act as if your nuance-less take is some kind of objective truth.

[@Guy_Tang]

Thank you for speaking up for our Asian-American community. You’re video is so powerful. ♥️❤️I connect with everything you are sharing and experiencing.

[@fromaudreykao]

hi guy!!! thank you for listening and supporting. love the work you're doing as well ☺️

[@user-ci7vu7eo9w]

Asians can leave west anytime

[@rev.andyh.1082]

Everything this woman says is spot on. I’m a white guy that’s been married 20 years to a Vietnamese woman. We started dating in middle school, dated through high school, and got married while we were both still in college. Our children are bilingual. I’ve never dated anyone else, never wanted anyone else, never loved anyone else. But if she and I had a dollar for every time some white guy winked at me or accused our relationship as being based on a fetish, we’d be millionaires! My wife and I find it deeply offensive when white AND Asian people bring up the whole “yellow fever” notion/accusation. What they are really saying is that our relationship is somehow less valid than their relationship. It’s like impossible for anyone to imagine that an interracial marriage could exist unless based on some weird sexual fetish. And I’m sick of it.

[@missmarie_8790]

You just proved that even Asian people get off on the fetishism of themselves. My fiancé dated a Chinese American girl before we met (I’m mixed white and Latino, and my fiancé is also mixed white and Latino, just for reference) and she would go on and on about how “white men are addicted to Asian pussy, because it’s the best,” her words not mine. And it actually made my fiancé uncomfortable as he didn’t date her because she was asian, but because they had similar interests. But she seemed to be stuck on the idea, that white men were interested in her because of her being Asian, which is really sad when you think about it, as she probably was extremely insecure, if she was willing to be ok with that kind of fetishizing and seemed so obsessed with it. But she also isn’t the only Asian woman I’ve heard, who has said that or similar. So i definitely feel like both groups are guilty of this fetishism, whites and Asians alike.

[@KTlisa]

I have so many Asian American girlfriends and this makes me sad. I appreciate this video! ❤️

[@fromaudreykao]

thank you for tuning in Katie ❤️ how lucky you and your Asian American girlfriends are to have each other!

[@piricarmen]

Love love love this video. Thank you so much for sharing.

[@fromaudreykao]

thank you so much for listening!!

[@aidaimcshmidai]

Hey I watched your video and I can’t believe how much I related to it! Thank you so much!!! ❤️❤️❤️

[@crystalfhang]

this was amazing - thank you for making this video and making a stand for our community!

[@777ikram]

Thank you for this. As a black man i knew this existed but I had no knowledge of how it was implemented. Thank you for sharing your experiences. Sounds very familiar...

[@timothyosborn7277]

I see it was 2 yrs ago you posted this, but, 2 yrs later it is still moving. Very well said

[@MrDelta88]

This video has made me a little wiser. As a black man, I'm no Stanger to racism. I always believe in respecting others, and not making assumptions based on ignorance. It's sad to hear what Asian American women go through, and the fact that people were down playing the deaths of 5 innocent women and refused to say their names is angering. I'm not buying that excuse that the media couldn't pronounce their names, they should've found someone who could. I don't like saying I have a "preference" for Asian women, saying so is dehumanizing in my opinion. I have an interest in Asian culture, and I want learn the experiences of other people. I believe my opinion as to why I think Asian women are attractive is honest and genuine, and is based on my opinion alone. At the end of the day, personality and who a woman is as a person is more important to me.

[@emerson8917]

thank you for this!!

[@fromaudreykao]

thank you for listening! 💕

[@wp4203]

When you realize it's Yellow Fever and not true love. - Every Asian woman ever

[@jimmyhoover7267]

I appreciate your help and time learning about the culture for I have friends that are Asin both men and women thank you so much for being willing to help me and others to learn what to keep in mind. I'm also Whit and dislike anyone who insulting all Asians.keep up the good work Jim

[@fromaudreykao]

thank you for listening and learning Jim!

[@lee-pb4ec]

Honestly yeah.....the amount of 5imes I've either heard ignorant people call me names, or say go back to China (I'm korean american) hurts.....but there's also fetishism I deal with. Now I'm back in school, im being praised? And actually liked, foe good and bad. I was called a virus a year ago, now I'm told I look like an anime character 😐

[@BlueSky......]

those people need to grow up

[@georgecrumb8442]

Did you read American history? European history? Whites have always hated other people -- unless it benefits them in some way. Why did you think otherwise? They've effectively colonized South Korea, and many other parts of the world. And now they're committing genocide in Palestine right now. This is who they are.

[@god-son-love]

Asians never feel at home in the US and Canada. At least that's how I feel after watching these videos.

[@truthlemonade9793]

A lot of us do.

[@rwxox]

Thank you for sharing Audrey!! 💕

[@fromaudreykao]

thank you Rachael 🥰

[@robertwilkinson8421]

Stop with all the Asian Fetish stuff already. Men just find you attractive, embrace it, go with it.

[@aden9237]

Thank you for making this video. It was comforting to know that I wasn’t alone in my experience, but it’s sad that we, as Asian American women, have to endure this fetishization and violence. I also struggled with my self hatred for years. I have also wondered if I was liked purely for my race. Our experiences are valid and I stand with all of my Asian American sisters. I really hope it gets better for us.

[@fromaudreykao]

thank you for watching and sharing, aden! I'm glad this video could speak to you and make you feel less alone in your experiences :)

[@user-ci7vu7eo9w]

You can leave any time

[@morinoko0802]

Similar experience as an Asian-Brazilian. Everytime someone asks about my ethnical background, I ask the same question back. Turns out the "whites" are of european heritage and the "browns" or "blacks" are of african heritage. In a sense, I try to make the point that we are all strangers in this same historically exploited land, so I encourage them to go dig up more about their own ancestrality (instead of questioning mine). 😜 Or I tell them to just adress me as a normal person, not an ethnicity. In my experience, my asian features are not attractive for the mainstream beauty standards. Only guys with yellow fever, otakus or those looking for "exotic" experiences may show some interest. It's a sad reality, but the psychological fact of "familiarity induces proximity" is real. I remember the feeling of belonging and being at ease as myself when I went to Taiwan before the pandemic. I felt seen as a person, devoid of any prejudice I've been accustomed to deal / ignore in my whole 36 years as an Asian-Brazilian. Thanks for sharing your experience 🙏 💐

[@gamarleton]

Often times I find people tend to forget why ppl try to liken themselves with others, and see this as "cultural appropriation" even when the person taking an interest in a culture doesn't have any ill intention. I think we all have some things like this where we need to remember who the true enemy is. But that's the only thing that I can't see helping this community. The rest of this, the amount of comments, getting called on the streets, the rapes... I'd be stupid to say it's not a real thing. So I never would. I'm sorry you have to deal with such a level of racism in this era. I know from some of my own - although different, somewhat familiar - things that I often get misstreated for, just how badly it can hurt you and damage you over time in childhood.

[@monsterego22]

The basic underlying point of fetishization or objectifjcation is the whole idea of "othering." Asians, more than anything, are seen as "perpetual foreigners ." That's where the idea of "exoticness" comes from. Statements of this type can come from non-asian too, not just men. Many believe that the fascination with kpop/K drama male actors by non-asian women is based on this idea too. Of course, there are no alarm bells ringing as there are in cases of men seeing women that way. I doubt the interest in korean male celebrities among non-asian women is sexual (it's just a fascination like a teenage girl into the latest boy band). Growing up, I often got comments about how "small" I was and "straight and shiny" my hair was. It was often from girls too. Theyre rooted in an overall idea of "otherness." It's usually only scary when a man specifically makes the assumption that an Asian woman is sexually subvervient.

[@ammerudgrenda]

Sensible comment. Thank you

[@Goldenboy1377]

I LOVE THIS POST!!!

[@candicef9638]

I’m a black women who had no idea. Thank you for sharing!

[@gwailou5]

Very good and informative video!

[@fromaudreykao]

thank you for watching!

[@jessethepersiankitty2377]

Blame patriachalism which stems from blaming Eve. Society by and large highly patriachal. It's sinful, and wicked I agree.

[@truthlemonade9793]

A) You are so right! Yes! You are indeed extremely privileged! B) I see so many videos and read so many articles from Asian American (or Canadian) women who say they felt so ugly growing up and wished they were white. They make these videos and write the articles becusee they know that people think they are now beautiful. Asian men feel the same way but we don't make those videos or write those articles because we know that people will say, "Yeah, but you are ugly." C) Even if all of that 19th and early 20th century Asian woman "fetishization" didn't happen, Asian American women would still be clamoring for white men as they are now. D) A lot of white men who you accuse of having "fetishes" and have a "long history of dating Asian women" really want white women but can't get them so they settle for Asian women but can't admit it because that would be an even bigger turnoff to Asian women who clearly prefer white men. E) To a lot of white men, white women are essentially "blondes, brunettes, redheads, and Asians." F) Do you even consider dating Asian men? I see you have yet another "warning guide for Asian women when dating," as if it is expected that you will date white men and not Asian men. G) If you think I am being "whiny," well what do you think about this video? Or are you only interested in women's feelings? H) "We need allies! Especially those that are male who are not Asian." Did you seriously say that? Right, because Asian men do not exist. Got it.

[@jessicaderosa9625]

I am an inmigrant in germany , the misogin and racism have lend me having hard case of body dismorphia. I am not asian, i am italian/argentinian but i know how u fell

[@Bruce_Wayne35]

Germans are racist towards Italians?

[@lockheart619]

I’m not asian but as a black american I definitely relate to your experience. I appreciate you being vulnerable and telling your individual story on this platform. It is disheartening that you faced the struggles you did as an asian woman, but I stand by you and other asian women that have to go through what you do.

[@hyperboy4803]

This should simply have more views. Time to educate my friends.

[@foodlover195_]

As a white guy I totally feel called out. I have a preference for Asian women because I've always had an interest in (mainly east-)Asian culture. I've never made it a focus or ruled out dating a person because they're not Asian, but my preference comes from a place of finding someone who shares a common interest / understanding for certain aspects of my life. In regards to meeting new people, especially for dating, I think race is just as valid as basing someone on blonde hair, height, or confidence etc. because at the end of the day you simply can't get to know everyone and assumptions are basically the only filtering option you've got. Obviously as you would know that doesn't excuse rudeness and ignorance, and people are still gonna have incorrect/possibly racist assumptions - but I'm just saying, I don't think it's always so black and white. Either way, I enjoyed the video and I think you should keep spreading your message :)

[@drb-kb5sp]

Such strength

[@invisibletraveller944]

You talk about yellow fever but what about white fever? AF tend to date white and put down am. Thoughts?

[@fromaudreykao]

I’m not sure I understand your question. What do you mean by “white fever”, “AF tend to date”, and “put down am”?

[@invisibletraveller944]

@@fromaudreykao when Asian women exclusively date white men. And they put down Asian men...oh reminds me of my brother! Etc ...in USA Asian American women have reputation of white worship. What's your opinion?

[@fromaudreykao]

@@invisibletraveller944 interesting perspective! given that Western society (and Eastern to an extent) prefers white individuals over people of other racial backgrounds, it is not surprising that some Asian women have a preferences for white men because they, of course, have not been excluded from the socialization that programs all of us to see white as superior and everybody else as inferior. Asian women, just like every single other person in the Western world, have a responsibility to check their biases and ask themselves "where does this bias come from?" and "could I possibly be misinformed?"

[@invisibletraveller944]

@@fromaudreykao hey Audrey. Thanks for reply. Appreciate it. Love to dialogue this subject with you. We need to be honest that there is deffo love of whiteness in the Asian American community. Everytime I see an Asian American female media personality she is always married or dating White guy. That speaks volumes. Even university campus Asian females talking about Asian men negatively. also someone told me once Whyte suprmcy works very well in the Asian American community. I read and heard Asian females are well educated well paid etc but when it comes to rcsm Whyte suprmcy they are completely ignorant. Where are the social racial conscious Asian American females like yuri kuchiyama?? Do they even exist anymore?

[@adamgorz9679]

@@invisibletraveller944 Great insight buddy. 👍 I'd bet all her tinder crushes are tall VVhite guys. And you're completely right about Asian women flocking to vvhite supremacy groups. Asian women fetish tall vvhite men more than vice versa.

[@Craig-pm2kc]

Next "What's is like being a non-asian living in Asia".

[@oldgus01]

Hold on, I've got a list I can send you. I just need your fax number.

[@Craig-pm2kc]

@Zaden Uchiha I'm sure she's happy to have you speaking for her.

[@icytadbull]

Glad to see an Asian woman standing tall! Be proud of who you are and keep going!

[@ohlawd3699]

LOL

[@nmonye01]

Great video. I am Nigerian American...a lot of this resonates.

[@drb-kb5sp]

I love international travel of all continents and countries. If i inquire about your ethnicity culture or nationality it is a genuine interest. Please don’t take offense. Even if you are Nigerian, Sri Lankan or Inuit, i am generally interested in your life. I. am a New Yorker that grew up diverse. Thank you for sharing your life with us 😊

[@jhnyjoejoe69]

You shouldn't worry about the yellow fever. Everyone has preferences and Asian women often have good traits. I like Asian women because they're the only girls who have shown genuine interest in me before and not giving mixed signals, playing games, etc.

[@themaple_dove]

By the time I'm watching this, this video was published about two years ago. As an Asian-American, your experiences hit way too close to home. >:(

[@dr_fantom]

I'm sorry for what you've experienced but tbh, people who would prefer a certain race over the others are pretty much the same. Growing up in Asia, I've known and seen many Asian men who openly/secretly fetishized white women as well. Obviously for a different set of characteristics found in white women but it's more or less the same thing and everything they like about them is of face value. Of course, it never becomes a big deal because Asian guys rarely get to be with them so it's swept under the rug.

[@alexs.5675]

Damn if you do damn if you don't

[@drb-kb5sp]

Black guy In America completely understands

[@primatejames]

If you don't care I don't care.

[@MetalHead-ks9zq]

Hey a lot of guys have to ask themselves does she like me for myself or just because I am financially successful??

[@iHeartAMP]

Look y'all wether you are white brown blue or purple. We dudes are gonna do what we do best "yo I love gormankuan females, they purple skin is so exotica" 😂😂😂

[@floydwhatchacallit6823]

"Some of you are going to be real mad at me." Goes on to be an overly polite Canadian. It did need to be said though.

[@rajeevkumre7469]

I have yellow fever , but once you come to know the person things are not same... 🙃 , The video is really informative... But being racist is not cool at all... , If you really want to know the person race doesn't matter.... That's how I overcome my yellow fever 💛

[@truthlemonade9793]

@kitnascimento002 A lot of white men who have a history of dating Asian women only do so because they are unable to date white women. They cannot admit this because that is actually in fact more demeaning to Asian women than admitting they are settling. So these white men are accused of having an Asian fetish when in fact they are just making do with their available options and taking advantage of the hordes of Asian women with white fetishes.

[@kitnascimento0]

@emonade9793 I also like some white woman but not necessarily blond. There was a period that i was like into black woman but it was misguided. Why? Because when i first watched porn in cinema (i had no VCR and there was no internet😃) i became like fascinated with what i thought was black porn actress that was like a sex machine (vanessa del rio) even in the movies. I later realized she was not black at all so me looking for another like her in the black section was a waste😄All of the black woman basically sucked and i never saw one that even come close to her since she was actually a dark latina🙂

[@jessethepersiankitty2377]

. I'm a white female btw and think you're absolutely wonderful.

[@LEEekgus]

I know what you're talking about majorly in this video due to experience but as another Asian, I can't pronounce other Asian words or names the way they should be pronounced. I immigrated to Australia little and I think that it's normal for people to feel you are different. I recently moved to Korea and any other race other than Koreans are treated differently. It's a normal human instinct to stick to what you're used to. White people here in Korea feel the same or worse here being bluntly marginalised due to their whiteness. Just some perspective that it's maybe an embedded human survival instinct than racism. And that white people also experience racism in other cultures/countries too. Nothing superior to being white.

[@brettldouglas]

1. First she complains that men don't find her attractive. 2. Then she complains that men do find her attractive. I've heard enough.

[@metalucas8022]

Head - you loose Tail - I win

[@user-yc9ib2he7l]

The hamster in her head is on crack. Major problems! You will be her next false allegations person of convenience. Say away from the landmine.

[@aggelos-db8ik]

Your favorite asian doll

[@GrizzlyWrath96]

If y'all deem it as a fetish perhaps we shouldn't deal with y'all at all. Maybe I shouldn't have a preference at all as a man with whom I want to be with or spend the rest of my life with. Maybe perhaps I shall categorize every relationship that you or any other Asian woman who wants to deal with someone outside of their race as a 'fetish'. When we see a woman who we are attracted to we want to get to know them and that comes knowing their backgrounds as well as their culture. Soo it never was a fetish.... it's a preference. Just like how woman have preferences who they want to be with but throw a categorization upon someone who they don't want to be with/attracted hence 'Asian fetish/yellow fever'.

[@LifeHappened]

Best content sharing friend// Stay connected👍👍👍🔔🔔🔔❤❤❤

[@80sGuy.]

There's a little secret and let me share that with you: First of all love yourself, then love your ethnic background and its people. All else will follow. Playing the typical hypocritical victim card ain't gonna cut it and it is getting old.

[@OceanicPearlz1]

I’m scared of this in college…. 5:07 As I am going to a mostly White Ethnicity School. I always lived in the Asian Bubble.

[@OceanicPearlz1]

My ex was like this… he also mocked my mother tongue…

[@truthlemonade9793]

And you dated him, so who is the fool?

[@kitnascimento0]

That is disrespectful if he does not have a close relation with her but he´s close that may just a way of being funny. Same way you will not call a person you just met using their nickname even if you know but once you became close you would use the nickname.

[@GoldAceNews]

No wonder nowadays most of these women never settle.

[@thuyvihoang9421]

Hey thank you so much for your video. It makes me happy, to know I‘m not alone with this issue and that those topics are going to speak up about it. I‘m sorry for the weird comments how has the audacity to be so rude and not understandable about that problem. Keep doing it, you doing great.🫶

[@MrKINGZEBRA]

So does a man who thinks that being with an Asian is normal make me a creepy guy??

[@truthlemonade9793]

You say "man" do you mean "white man"? And I would say "no, it does not make you necessarily creepy." After watching this video and her guide to knowing if the man (implied white man) has a fetish, it is abundantly obvious that she dates white men as the default.

[@rpgdreamer8690]

i'm a southeast asian male and I am attracted to asian women but am too shy to approach them... I feel like they are out of my league. :(... Not to mention making friends with them ... Also I have no one to talk to because I am a loser and a loner :0

[@rpgdreamer8690]

@Ciara Martinbw? As in black women? I had a crush before on my sister's black friend, but I knew she was too good for me haha. I was already an introvert shy person, and being around her made it worse because I was always anxious... That probably gave her the impression that I was rude and stand-offish though, which a lot of people seem to think when they meet a stranger with anxiety. It is understandable because people with anxiety and other issues do seem/appear sus to the normal folk. Also the same reason I get nervous when encountering public servants like police because I feel they think i'm suspicious and hiding something because I try to avoid eye-contact with them and sometimes keep my head down. Like im hiding drugs or something....

[@rpgdreamer8690]

@Ciara Martin Was bullied alot in school and at home. Mostly verbal but it does hurt. Made me question who I should be and how I should act. Doesn't help that family and relatives made me feel imasculated, no manhood, unable to think for myself... To feel dependant and worthless without them... So nowadays, I feel a little regret now that I am approaching my early 30s, that I wasn't able to experience young love... Hoping to meet someone that can boost my self-esteem and confidence. I was always searching for something to make me feel good to get rid of the trauma... Videogames, anime, porn, hentai... e.t.c. They were my escapism. I watched a sermon a few years ago about the effects of media on the brain. One part said something along the line of "parental neglect, especially that of a father, drives many a young men to pornography." And now that I think about it, I discovered porn because I wanted some new stimuli to make myself feel good as appossed to always feeling sad, gloomy, and depressed. Thinking that the women on my computer screen can fill the void of my dark soul... For a very short time I did find it pleasurable, and would even say I was momentarily happy, or in better words... Satisfied with life. But of course that was further from the truth. Till now, I am pretty bitter against my parents. All those emotions I have held inside me. I despise my parents. And although I do hate them for not loving me enough... This too, is one of the parts of the deficiencies of human nature.

[@charmander777]

i would suggest going to church and study the Bible. Confess your sins and you will be saved. Then start building your self-confidence.God will give you wisdom. i am sure you can find SE asian women who are definitely within 'your league' one day and have a family with her.

[@BeranM]

I rarely, if ever, find East Asian or Asian women attractive, but I realize now that even if I did it wouldn't matter. If a Non-Asian person is truly smitten and has genuine feelings for an Asian or East Asian person, true romance and legitimate love cannot be experienced in a natural way because the initial attraction always stems from a fetishization of the other person. I realize this now. Thank you for enlightening me.

[@charmander777]

5:26 maybe it's just a probability thing. I mean, in Montreal Odds are pretty good that if you're asian, you're most likely Chinese just by the fact that it's the largest asian population. And if you're Chinese, most likely Mandarin speaking. Odds are very slim you'll run across someone from say the Hmong population or Mongolian for example. But yeh, i get your point.

[@tevi5082]

I wish Asian Americans to stop stereotyping Asians from Asia and saying "I'm Asian AMERICAN and I'm not that submissive doll me-love-you-long-time doll from Asia". There is no me-love-you-long-time BS in Asia either. It's a sick fantasy. Nobody cares if you are Asian American or Asian from Asia so stereotyping Asian from Asia simply backfires everyone with Asian physical features.

[@thuyvihoang9421]

Go cry about it

[@Super-yw7ss]

When a race feels compliments are racists, yet many other ethnicities/race have stereotypes yet they don’t complain or wish they had these compliments. It’s good to educate ppl but sometimes ppl go too far with saying this is racists, it doesn’t matter if a person loves a certain race for whatever reason, in the end the relationship will work or not, and it won’t be because your a particular race, it will be because they really got to know you. No disrespect, Just my 2 cents.

[@JonathanLit]

This woman sounds awful. I just got an Asian American girlfriend for the first time in my life and I was trying to understand her better so I came here. I have blond hair and blue eyes. All this woman did is make me feel bad about myself and be very negative towards men like me. I hope this woman develops some more empathy in the years to come.

[@milirocfresh5491]

I know she sounds pretty ignorant talking about all white males where there are black and other race of men that have fetish Asian women or any race of women like that's a preference why this chick in her feelings

[@mattcoleman6780]

nobody refers to asian women when talking about being exotic.

[@jdjperez]

As a parent of Asian mixed daughters, I know is true. I have seen it myself and know how upsetting it is to my daughters and their Asian American friends. I am not a woke, leftwing or apologist for the left. I grew in conservative Orange County, California. To be fair, not all whites, blacks, hispanics, etc, and not all males engage in microagression or racist, but if you call an asian american girl “exotic,””asiatic,” “arroz” or “chinita” you are racist.

[@LuckBrown-re7yg]

Yeah there are billions of them. What is so exotic of slanted, no ass ,no boobs women.

[@stevechan6244]

As an asian Guy I went to dance clubs sitting around doing nothing for 30 years without ever being asked for a date or getting past just talking...or anything? I am now OLDER and more settled as a Medical Professional and still sit around at clubs doing nothing but drinking. I am former US Miltary as well. If you are Asian Male and are new to America or Canada know that YOU are REVILED and HATED by most WHITE WOMEN. You are better off going to Asia and maybe starting a life there instead. Even if you are finacially successful you are not ikely to ever find a lady person to just be happy with EVER! I have since flown to Asia/South East Asia and have been very successful to date there instead. I do not know why I ever thought I would be able to find someone here? I am 5'11 and weigh 210 lbs so I am not small or large; but rather average. If you are an Asian Male then BAIL from North America! Maybe you will never come back?

[@st4r444]

Hey white girl. It's nice to see you with white last name and white kids white privilege while Us people of color over here struggle but proud of our culture

[@realmartin.minkov]

My gf is Japanese. I love them because of their uniqueness. Beein Asian does give them attractive advantages. I don't see how this is a bad thing. Man are sexualy attracted to many types of girls. I prefer asian to western, you can call it fetish or whatever but I don't see why this is a bad thing.

[@metalucas8022]

Many girls are crazy of guys with blue/green eyes and a chad jaw line, by their logic it’s a form of oppression They just like to invent problems for the purpose of playing the rebels against the racist bad society

[@lalalala7738]

Uniqueness? I don't see how it is a bad thing? sexual attraction? You are literally the person she was talking about in the video, but if your girlfriends are gaijin hunters, I hope you are both happy dating each other's race instead of each other's souls. You might not see the problem because you are not seeing the big picture, when the general idea is that you are a sexual object that acts a certain way.. chances are you are at risk of being the next Eva Liu or Mengqi Ji, murdered because you are not the submissive exotic fck doll they thought you were supposed to be.

[@syrenaxhaferi7278]

Kids are mean

[@thesilvertechie3070]

As a white male who has had these preferences for many years, you gave me a lot to think about. Thank you for taking the time to share your perspective and opening my eyes to my racism. I will strive to do better.

[@fromaudreykao]

thank you for being open to listening and learning!

[@superidol654]

Lucky I don't live in america lol I will come to american to study college.

[@rastaman39]

You’re a gorgeous beautiful soul ❤

[@oldgus01]

As a white guy with a majority of my ex's being Asian, I don't got much of a leg to stand on. But that said, there's nothing I hate more than seeing a new English teacher roll into town and just *knowing* he came here for all the wrong reasons. Seriously, those guys give us honest teachers a bad name. The most use they are is as a distraction for the Gaijin Hunters. Sincerely, an 11-year ESL teacher in BFE Japan.

[@VulcanXIV]

Damn, going even further, korean men must be getting hunted ravenously

[@uDubRiceBoy]

Where are you from? ... Where are you really from?

[@Dominic-rw9dj]

So, geishas were first sexualized and objectified by Western men...? Agree about WW2 red light districts though, all came into being because of US forces, including the red light districts in Australia...

[@kitnascimento0]

Not really its because they come from a anglo sexually repressive culture where sexuality is stigmatized. That´s not the case in asian cultures like japan or china. Other cultures like many in middle east are even more repressive. For instance notice that these culture practice male mutilation aka circumcision? Why? To remove pleasure and discourage sexual relations.

[@audreyluan5325]

YOu have the same first name is me!!!! :)

[@drb-kb5sp]

Black guy In America

[@truthlemonade9793]

Are you suggesting that this is the experience of most Black men in America? I would think that most Black men in America should feel so lucky. I would think that most people on the planet earth wish they could be so lucky.

[@bdmenne]

When I was 9 an Asian-Hawaiian-Euro girl was my first crush. I’ve always been attracted to round face and brunette hair ever since. Also euro men & women have been objectified in media (porn, Hollywood, marketing), but no one admits that destructive practice. Apparently, we need to mix to oblivion destroying all differences, and install one language/names or we segregate to preserve/save variety/true diversity.

[@bdmenne]

@Ciara Martin its Neotany. Asians have the most of all races. All men are drawn to neotany a.k.a. Youthful looks which implies more innocent, naive, inexperienced, which is valuable to men’s selection as it increases the decreased odds of previous sexual partners, children and/or STDs. It’s biology. Okcupid did a pattern reveal of this phenomenon. Frustrated, hurt, confused and ignorant people “socially construct” it as a pathology needing to be addressed and cured. Segregation will follow. Humans love to think on themselves as being above animal. 98% of our Animal DNA is shared with Chimps, and 93% with Bacterium. Just love when a “woke” Leftist quote “Trust sCiEnCe!!!” when they avoid it when convenient.

[@bdmenne]

@Ciara Martin ?

[@tklmmft]

I don’t care about the negativity among Asian women particularly Chinese women like you. You are so beautiful inside out. I meant it and I’m an Asian American guy by the way.

[@davidparks4835]

What’s wrong with preferring Asian women? I understand what you are talking about as being felt as if your not an individual and being fetishized but some men just have unique tastes. I find a lot of you Asian American women attractive just like a lot of other different female groups. Great video content by the way! It was nice seeing your perspective on this. I learned a lot!

[@blossomhernandez6664]

Having a racial preference just sounds wrong and most people that have racial preferences is because of stereotypes and as she said in the video can be damaging

[@fromaudreykao]

thank you David! there's nothing wrong with having preferences, but it's important to know where those preferences come from, especially if your preference is women of a certain race. i hope this video opened you up to the historical and societal context that your preference for Asian American women lies in!

[@davidparks4835]

@align with audrey It has! Thank you!

[@hemanshuchudasama3535]

@@davidparks4835 she is gonna end up marrying white male as well 🤣🤣😝

[@jollyjumper5784]

your insecurities about your background make you overrate the relevance of your ethnicity. everyone has some features that stand out and thus will be adressed; and this isnt mean, it makes you special. my and my friends' names are butchered every day - so what, how can you expect others to know how to pronounce languages they dont know, should they learn every language? just because you broke up with your white boyfriend doesnt mean all white men are bad, and pretending some nervous guys pointing out the first thing that comes to their mind when they approach a girl, is violence is an insult to all who actually suffer from malicious people. your hatespeech against white males makes asians look really bad because its sexist, endorses the idea that whites are in any way superior, which they are not, and capitalizes on the construct of race, which in fact does not exist. its racist by our own terms. you are a hypocrite for advocating people pay special attention to asians whilst complaining that they are too much into asians. further more, preferring a certain look is neither uncommon nor specific to whites and does not even tell anything about ethnical preferences: one of my friends always ends up with red haired chicks and doesnt even seem to realize they all resemble his second girlfriend! lots of people gravitate to partners resembling their first big crush...

[@rp6879]

Asians and Canada. LOL!

[@yerusalem4832]

Womp womp

[@kevinbrathwaite1116]

I think you're a beautiful woman Audrey Lao be strong and don't mind the negative toxic people, haters will hate💪I 'm not white though but I love Asia, Asian women and Asian cultures, I have Asian friends, It's sad that all the so called minority groups and (POCs) still have to be dealing with some kind of racism in the 21st century.

[@wenkaiyang1487]

I don't agree with what you said about foreigners saying ni hao to you. You take curiosity as offense. That's over sensitive. I would be happy if they are interested in my language and culture.

[@thuyvihoang9421]

You really don’t want to understand it huh.

[@clionechan2553]

The point is that they also say it if you're not Chinese, though... or don't speak Mandarin...

[@djlkasdm9129]

I understand what you're getting at but how about people just greet people normally instead? Consider this, maybe a hello? If the person that is being spoken to isn't Chinese at all then what then after you just said Ni Hao? I have trouble understanding people that proclaim this, if someone was really interested in our language and culture then shouldn't they maybe find out where we're actually from after greeting us normally? I get mistaken as Chinese time after time and people say Ni Hao to me as a way to mock me. I'm not even east Asian at all.

[@superidol654]

When they say ni hao why don't you speak white language to them back like hola

[@evhookalways]

I have worse, I am 40% Turk%30Persian %8 Greek %22 Slovakia. I have strong accent and I hate that White ladies act like I am less than them, Spanish, Blacks and Asians act I do not belong to their groups. I have my family here, my husband is from Ohio and my special needs child should live in the US. I love our flag, my English is very good, I am majoring psychology, I respect everyone. But 13 years everyday people ask me where I am from originally, how did I met my husband etc.etc. I cannot even have friends because people see especially in CA we have gaps:(

[@ContrarianExpatriate]

Professional victim. Not appealing at ALL!

[@partlysimpson5154]

I have yellow fever, what can i do?

[@levertfairley4603]

well mrs audrey im a blackman do you think i still have a chance with an asian women

[@coolestrarestthings8442]

You are so cute what is your zodiac sign?

[@WittyFlush]

😂lol she doesn’t understand dating climate from Americans men.

[@waynecorder7675]

I'm sorry you have had some bad experiences with white people. But they all are not like that. I dated many different races as a young man but was always used as a stepping stone for the next bigger better deal to come along. It wasn't till I married a lady from the Philippines that really showed me the family values that I had been missing in my life. We have been married 21 years now and have a daughter and as a mostly white American man I wished I had never bothered with the previous white American lady I married, somehow humanity has been getting worse instead of better. Asian women are not ugly, your beautiful and you need to believe that in your heart 1st. The rest will follow. Because of peal harbor and Korean War plus Vietnam War alot of ignorant Americans put all Asians in a box and seem to have hatred towards them. This is such a bad thing. Yet we buy Toyota Kia Nissan and other Asian products I don't get it. Anyway I try not to be closed-minded about anything and my daughter is dating a Korean kid who seems really nice, I will trust her judgment on who to date. I wish I had seen your video or something like this a long time ago. I was always taught to respect others it seems many others didn't get that message. Sad to say.

[@mememantyrique1029]

You talk a big game but let me guess, you’ve never dated a single Asian man. Not only that, you EXCLUSIVELY date white men. As a female that was born in a western country with higher education, you’re in the top 1% of privelidged individuals yet you claim all this victimhood status for some awkward comments you’ve received. Asian men are for more oppressed in so many ways, yet not a single mention of the fact that every single Asian female screaming about white “soup” in fact ignores and reviles their own men in favor of their self professed “oppressors”. If you’ve had a single white boyfriend you’re part of the problem. Btw stop calling yourself “Asian-American”. You said multiple times you’re a Canadian citizen

[@JoelLessing]

Canada is America.

[@thuyvihoang9421]

You can keep scrolling nobody gives a fuck what you saying. All asian woman can do what they want and deserving the right how they want treated. To discuss with you would be a total waste of time. So you don’t like her opinion fine, keep scrolling. You don’t have to watch it.

[@truthlemonade9793]

Right, I find her complaints to be very uncompelling.

[@helmutweikert3054]

Wow, really got those liberal talking points down.

[@steve19811]

I know must you must be good at math so consider that a majority of Asians are 1st or 2nd generation westerners so, yeah, just deal with it as it's logical that you are your parents are recent immigrants and natural for people to make assumptions or have questions. God forbid they offend you.

[@levertfairley4603]

you are not ugly neither

[@11inch41]

preference is a thing, you live in montreal, a bilingual city, im canadian too, don't keep that crap up, people can ask you if you speak english since people can either speak just french or just english, it happens. stop making shit up.

[@shinhye3974]

I respect your opinion but just so you know us as men have something call preference. I like asians and latinas and the way you're mentioning your concern it sounds like you only want to be noticed by whites or your own race and that's really racist. I want to date an Asian or a Latina and get to know them personally and have a future with them and do my best to live for any of these two races I prefer so don't take our right to choose as men just because you want your race to be exclusive. That's very insulting.

[@thuyvihoang9421]

So you a male and not even an asian either. You have no idea how it is to be an asian woman. How creepy dudes treating us, don’t know if you even listen to the end of the video. But that video is a message for women and men, how it’s is in the asian view. RACIST/SEXIST/FETISHIZED expectations or fantasy about asian can be dangerous for asian woman/men. That why it’s a important message to all of us. How to be careful about those weird & creepy people and how to avoid them. I don’t to discuss with you, it would be a total waste of time.

[@jeremiahball3970]

I know that must be annoying. Admittedly,my race can be very lame. However,I must say,I am in love with Asian culture, history,and the people in general. But don't get the wrong idea when someone like me find women like you attractive. A lot of us simply prefer to date/marry ladies of asian descent. I personally find asian women more attractive than girls of my race. There's nothing racial about it. For some of us it's simply a preferance. Like how there's white women who prefer black men or other ladies or whatever. It's a sexual preferance. This can be confused with racial crap though, especially these days. I know there is this stupid thing that western culture tends to sexualize asian women,but downplays asian men. Like only the women should be found sexy. Yeah,that's good old western society for you.

[@fromaudreykao]

Hi Jeremiah, thanks for sharing. Not sure if you watched my video, but I invite you to watch from 7:39 to learn more about "having a preference for Asian women." I would also invite you to reflect on why you have this attraction towards Asian culture and Asian women - where did it come from? Have you always had this affinity? When did it start? I hope these invitations can give you some important insight!

[@jeremiahball3970]

@@fromaudreykao yeah,I checked it out. I can see your point. As to the where and why of my attraction,I really couldn't say. It's just there. I find the history, culture,music,and people to just be intriguing. Being heavily influenced by these things growing up,I guess that is how I gained the interest. For example,my earliest influence would have to be the music and films/anime. My siblings enjoyed jpop,kpop,anime and had an affinity for collecting katanas. This seem simple enough,and irrelevant but it sparked the interest all the same.Also, I'll never forget when I first was exposed to Seeing the great Japanese filmmaker's classic films like The last samurai, Gojira,all those type films. They were really revolutionary. Then with anime,I found a uniquely different and gorgeous art style that made a lot of western stuff pale in comparison. These things all contributed.And being a lover of history, naturally I gravitated towards the history of the asian people. It being a very rich and proudly colorful history.As for the people, I've found them to be very hard working,ingenuitive and have a better mind set in my opinion than the west. Moreover,Asian culture has,and continues to leave a great impression and contribution to American culture that it stands to reason that people like me would find men and women of Asian descent attractive. And seek to befriend and date/marry them. Sorry,I made this a little more long winded than what I meant it to be. But I hope I have clarified the mindset of myself,and those with similar interests as me.🙂

[@jeremiahball3970]

On a similar note,there are many Asian ladies who have a mutual attraction to western men. The same applies to them. Everyone has their preferances.

[@jessethepersiankitty2377]

Lol give up buddy. She's not interested.

[@jeremiahball3970]

@@jessethepersiankitty2377 not trying for her buddy. Furthermore,if I want to hook up with an Asian lady,I'll just do so In person. Not comment on youtube lmfao 😂