What moment in D&D spiraled way out of control?

[@demogorghon]

It's always a joy to hear a story I totally forgot I posted and slowly realise "wait... that sounds familiar"

[@Aaarrrgh89]

Minor spoilers for Curse of Strahd: we suspected a corrupt mayor of having an important item hidden in his home, so we decide to sneak in while he is away. Our warlock, who had already visited the house, knocked on the front door to distract the staff, and the rest of us entered through the kitchen. Terrible stealth rolls. We get discovered by the mayor's big muscle enforcer, and find ourselves in a dilemma. We decide to attempt to lite or way out, which fails, and then try to defend ourselves non-lethally. Our hope had been to stick around in this time, so murder felt inappropriate. Unfortunately, the guy manages to call for reinforcements before we can knock him out, and suddenly we are defending ourselves against four town guards as well. The warlock abandons the maid (which he had successfully seduced), and follows the guards upstairs, hoping he can deescalate the situation. Instead, a guard who didn't know he had a seemingly legitimate reason to be there attacked him, and he responded with an eldritch blast. CRIT. Guard dies instantly. We managed to subdue everyone else, and tied them up, all the while knowing that they had just witnessed one of us kill one of them. We begin searching the house, thinking we'll be left alone since the guards are tied up and the staff left once the fighting began. Turns out the mayor had a reclusive son who is still at home. And a powerful mage. He politely, but firmly explains that his party of the house off limits. His medium for explaining this fact is a fireball. We are now half dead and convinced we need to get away from there ASAP. The son never got a good look at us and seems entirely uninterested in who we are out what we do as long as we leave him alone, so the only real loose thread is the enforcer and the guards, who both saw our faces and witnessed a murder. So after dinner intense debate, we concluded that the only way we could have a chance of remaining in town meant leaving the lizardfolk barbarian alone with our captives for a few minutes. It was unpleasant, to say the least. The silver lining was that not only did the mayor not suspect us, we also convinced him that we were the best people to investigate the break-in. We ended up having plenty of time to find what we were looking for.

[@mamaliamalak7825]

What moment in D&D spiraled way out of control? The OGL update.

[@colton3989]

This story has so many moving parts that I could expand on, but let's try to condense it. A few years ago we were playing in a campaign that had a low fantasy gritty feel to it. The party was Caiden (my bright-eyed optimistic peasant with dreams of becoming a paladin and a hero), Dan (the son of our village's reeve with a strong sense of justice and lawful neutral to a fault, he was an Eldritch Knight), Quentin (the oldest of us from the village and a philosopher that held disdain for the Gods and was trying to play the forces we met against each other, he also felt responsible for us like an older brother, he was a Warlock), Anselm (the noble born son and knight-errant who my character ended up squiring for, Vengeance Paladin), Morgan (Servant to the God of Death, Fate, and Prophecy, Grave Cleric), and to a lesser extent Anton (a half-elf assassin, who joins towards the end) and Luke (a rough and tumble Barbarian with a love for fighting and drinking). The party had over the course of two months slowly added more and more powder into a keg we were all sitting on; we were on a quest to destroy an Ancient Red Dragon that we had angered for killing her mate, she had vowed to destroy humanity starting with the home city of Sir Anselm. The city was decimated, almost reduced to rubble. We began to round up any survivors we could find to lead them from the destruction. Seeing the devastation, Morgan had a crisis of faith, having been the one who guided us to the dragon we killed because she was receiving visions from her God. Morgan was convinced by Quentin to serve as the new vessel to his patron, a Demon Lord named Azazel; so was born Morzazel! So on the several month journey it took to lick our wounds we were hounded and psychologically picked apart by Morzazel as she tried to sink her claws into each of us. One incident towards the end of our journey had Caiden finally realize there was something fiendish in their midst, but when he confronted Quentin, he was convinced Quentin had things under control; Caiden trusted his friend that he had known his whole life. Things have gotten bad, but they haven't spiraled yet. Having entreated the kingdom's Mage Tower for help, Anselm spent sleepless nights looking for a weapon that would help him defeat the dragon and that is when he heard of a Runeblade in the north that could kill any dragon and had been wielded in many a monarch's death. It was at this time he knighted Caiden, raising him from peasantry to be a full fledged knight, one of the proudest moments of my character's life. I had convinced him that we should look for some other weapon and reluctantly he agreed. We set out with new purpose and entered this gateway which took us to this other world of walkways, stairs, and the void; it was the fastest way to get where we wanted to go, but was also dangerous. If we were not careful we would draw the attention of this entity that lived in the darkness. Well after several days of travel in the dark, we fail our group stealth and are forced to take the nearest gateway out. We exit into daylight just outside of an elven farm, further from our destination than ever. It was at this point that the Demon Lord who had been manipulating and corrupting our party for over a month now, in the body of our Cleric reached out her hand to Anselm, "I can take you to your heart's desire, all I need is your blood." A broken and desperate man after seeing the destruction of his home, Anselm gave up his blood willingly and Morzazel began to draw a teleportation spell using his blood. This sent the nearby elven farmers into a panic and as they began to run for help Morzazel told Anton, "Kill any attempting to flee." The assassin did as his master bid and let loose an arrow killing one of the elves. Caiden was stunned, conflicted between his duty to his friends and the wanton death and blood magic on display, "Let them be! They are no threat to us." Anton readied another arrow and said, "They have nothing to fear, if they don't run." Caiden could see the fear on the elves' faces, he had just sworn a sacred oath to be a shield for the innocent and those farmers would run. Caiden charged at Anton, but was intercepted by Luke! Anselm came to the defense of Caiden as he was struck down, while Dan and Quentin tried to bind Azazel to a magical dagger we had found earlier, failing with at least Dan being destroyed outright. Anselm gave the last of his Lay on Hands to stabilize Caiden before being pulled away by Morzazel to find the Runeblade which would liberate his home. That truly kicked off the first act or a four year campaign that spanned three separate games and after a year and a half break from that point I got to play Caiden again and learn what had happened in those elven lands afterwards. It was a truly epic campaign, but those sessions leading up to the CvC were intense! I have nothing but love for all the players in that group.

[@Gamer88334]

My favorite story in this video is the one that sounded like it would've made a good Monty Python skit.

[@MeyerLeah990]

Our party was investigating some documents and clues we'd found in the library of a monestary. We couldn't find information on some of the more cultish clues, so when our monk saw someone enter the secured section of the library, he shadow-stepped in. Right in front of the sister who'd just entered. Cue the rest of the session turning into a cat-and-mouse game with him and the guards, while the other two party members tried to distract the guards without implicating themselves. The session ended with the monk getting away after a minor hostage situation, and the two other party members being taken in to see the guards (though thankfully no one figured out we were helping the monk, simply that we'd been seen together).

[@Dr_Ducker_Quack]

Being somewhat new to D&D, and wanting to help a friend find a game, we joined a game that turned out to be a oneshot. I tried to be creative and create a swashbuckler rogue, and took inspiration of a certain character from the Gorillaz, making a halforc named Cobb. But because of complications where I made my character and what I wanted to do, I had to change him to a fighter. Me having only played a Kobold Cleric in the past, saw nothing swrong with this. In our group, everyone was somewhat new to their roles, so our DM didn't know all the rules to combat, and balance in the game. So we recceived special and rare gear, with even some magical items. Everything went well until our group hit level 3. I was playing Cobb the way I imagined him, a pirate wielding two handaxes getting in the face of enemies to intimidate them. But with a combo of Double wielding, action surge, savage attacks and Champion. He grew out of control... Fast... Us not interpreting criticals correctly caused me to double attack damage on a nat 19. and triple the damage on a nat 20. Causing him to do a maximum of 64 damage with a Single swing. But that's not the bad part, then using double wield you could make that a max of 128 damage, and action surge with the same moves would bring that to a max of 256 damage. Let's just say that the enemies we faced, were not made for that, and I might have killed a adult green dragon in 2 turns. So for the rest of the game, balance spiraled down as enemies became extremly tough and the party increasingly became crazily strong. And the final fight for the session was against a thug with 4500 health. At this point we realised that the game had gone way out of control. I can safely say that I was the root of this problem as I didn't know what I was doing, and our poor awsome DM had to deal with my broken fighter. TLDR: I made a fighter that spiraled out of control and led to the end of the campaign, and now I just want to play my Kobold cleric with permanent disadvantage on insight

[@badpressure]

"New kind of pineapple"=pineapple style hand grenades?

[@vibechecker3168]

Mercenary company raided a VERY fancy hunting caravan, oddly anonymous though. As we were wrapping up the attack and thieving everything in sight, our bard, who was a very well travelled musician in the royal courts, found a body, recognised it as the heir of the neighbouring principality. Needless to say we skedaddled out of there before we could be caught as the instigators for the war that would surely be about to happen. Thankfully we weren't flying the colours or else we would be blacklisted off the market, not to mention killed by the prince. Tldr; we start a war in the pursuit of shiny trinkets.

[@frytoslawpl1070]

So literally yesterday I was DMing my campaign to my friends. (By the way - we play our own RPG invented entirely by us, it's called Querhan, so the rules are a bit different here than in D&D.) The players were supposed to eliminate a gang of bandits attacking merchant caravans, led by three sisters. While exploring the underground garrison that served as a base for the bandits, players found an armory with a trap workshop and gunsmithing stations. When they asked me if they would find anything interesting here, I said without thinking that there was a small cannon in the corner. It was a mistake. The player who played the dwarf immediately rolled for taking this cannon. He threw a nat20. I had no choice but to let him take it. In the final fight, after killing one of the sisters (here, players rolled for avoiding the negative effects of breaking a sister's blood bond), one of the players came up with the idea of loading the defeated sister's body into a cannon and firing it into another. This precedent took them an entire turn of combat, but they finally managed to fire the cannon. The eldest sister didn't stand a chance. This is how my players made a prop kill with the body of a dead sister. P.S. It was a very weak campaign because half of the six players were constantly fooling around and completely avoiding roleplaying to just fight everything that moved. Me and my three good players often looked at each other, but we couldn't do anything because two funny guys came from afar and I didn't want to kick them out. As a consolation, I promised these 3 buddies a D&D campaign as a reward for good behavior, and I will simply not invite the rest to my campaigns.

[@greatestbud750]

Our team was doing a one shot, and we were literally at the end, and one of us chose to cast fire bolt on a bunch of barrels. They dealt 180 fire damage, but the dm let us roll a dex saving throw to half the damage. We were level 3.

[@postapocalypticnewsradio]

PANR has tuned in.

[@Explodinghairypotatocat]

Rad.

[@Microwaveables11]

real hey um I'm low on supplies is there a chance you have a foodbank of some kind, kinda struggling against the giant vine-covered cockroaches

[@postapocalypticnewsradio]

@Animated Anon we here at PANR do not have the facilities required to feed the masses. However, there is a settlement fifty kilometers to the east. They will have the necessary resources to provide you all you require.

[@winstonwoodward8325]

Am I the only one that thought the first sub was a perfect example of meta gaming ?

[@athena1491]

i mean, if zombies existed in your world, you would probably know a bit about them, kinda like bear attack advice irl, so imo "zombies are stupid and attack the nearest thing they can see" doesnt seem any more metagaming than "dragons breathe fire or acid or ice," or "glaives have extra reach" I think a lot of it would be common knowledge for people.

[@winstonwoodward8325]

@@athena1491 it’s been so long at this point that I don’t remember what the story was about. But I will take your word for it

[@athena1491]

@@winstonwoodward8325 valid, respect the honesty, was arokora flying over zombie horde so they focused them instead of the party

[@patricksocha6930]

The party was set on a path that ended with us coming into combat with a deity. Before the beginning of combat, the DM set some character sheets face down for downed and dead players to play as throughout the fight. One of those characters was a Jar that’s only thing it could do was “Blast”. What blast did was deal xd6 in accordance with any and every character in combat. You could get out of taking damage if you rolled some number or range of number I can’t remember which. Anyways, my character eventually ended up not only going down but dying. Not only did my character go down but at least one other did and they got control of The Jar. With its only attack action being Blast, on their turn they consistently used Blast. Since I was already using one of the other characters the DM provided that added another d6 of damage for Blast. Suffice it to say I went through at least 3 different characters that combat encounter including my character that I believe got Blasted to death.

[@patricksocha6930]

The party had stopped in at a tavern. After a bit, another party member who was playing a Dragonborn came in with a suspicious looking character in a trench coat. The rest of the party rolled high enough to see that it was three Kobolds in a trench coat. The Kobolds and the Dragonborn sit down at the bar and eventually, I can’t quite remember how, the Dragonborn ends up either stuck in between a ceiling beam or something while the rest of the party do shenanigans to the Kobolds. First off me, a rogue used sleight of hand to remove the middle Kobold and put it on the ground next to me to get the Dragonborn to notice that the Kobolds weren’t a normal person but actually 3 Kobolds in a trench coat. What then proceeded to happen was a third party member started tossing and kicking one or two of the Kobolds around the tavern for a bit. By the end of the shenanigans, the Kobolds decided to leave, which then prompted our DM to question why every time he introduced an NPC to the party we instantly caused problems for them.

[@EXC334]

The potion bottle, this happened before I returned to forever DMing due to scheduleing issues. This was a homebrew campaign run by my friend, we've been playing on and off for around 5 years now. The rest of the party was new, like first session new. I was playing Adanay Eserita Torla, a valenar high elf, now Adanay has a fairly traumatic backstory. When I made Adanay I made her with the DM. My friend the DM knows that roleplay is my favorite thing, and that I method act for roleplay, each time I go into a session I am truly in that time period my character. The DM and I sat down and wrote her backstory together, now we were both curious what I would do with a traumatic backstory as I tend to stay on the tamer side, to spark note it, Adanay was from Valenar, sge frew up in the lower slums of the valenar capital roaming the streets with a thieves guild, she spent the time she wasnt stealing or scamming taking care of the street urchina and orphans, about 100 or so years later a cataclism struck Valenar, the border between the material plane and the plane of the dead broke open and the spirits of the depraved began a mass extinction of Valenar, Adanay now having grown into the Valenar military led the evacuation effort. Adanay and a small group of other Elves started a push back into the Valenar capital to find any survivors, during this process Adanay became connected to the dead (giving her her subclass, phantom rougue) finding no survivors they fled across the ocean. Adanay haunted by her memories and the whispers of the dead she knew roamed which is how she met the party. Now to the actual incident, it was probably four sessions in we had just finished with the starting village and low ranking kill the goblin quests as most parties have just starting out, we had travelled a few weeks to a large port city, while the parties other Elf, our sorcerer and Adanay stayed in our carriage waiting in line to get through the gates the rest of the party, our fairy ranger, dwarf fighter, and satyr barbarian, had decided to walk up and speak with the guards about jumping line as we had some time sensitive mail. While the rest of the party was waling the couple miles to the gates Adanay and the sorcerer were talking, the conversation was fairly mundane, it slowly moved onto more personal subjects touching on things like home and family, now the DM has a rule about not sharing backstories with eachother, I also use this rule as it makes for great roleplay, Adanay started to become vague and alittle standofish, the sorcerer not realizing why "mom" as the party called Adanay, as she pretty much was the mom of the party, was being standoffish for some reason took this as the perfect time to flirt with Adanay, now Adanay has nothing against the sorcerer or anyone else in the party, it's just the simple fact that she is far older than anyone else, the sorcer was easily a hundred and fifty, however to Adanay being close to three hundred herself thinks of the rest of the party as children, or in the sorcerer's case a teenager, she thinks of them as her children, replacements for the lost urchins she used to take care of, granted this is a really unhealthy way of copeing with trauma, I know this, Adanay does not and so I rolled with it. Now Adanay has essentially just been hit on by a child in her eyes. To deal with the sorcerer's flirting i began to look through my bag and found i still has an empty potion bottle, I called to the DM, i said i throw my potion bottle at the sorcerer, the DM rolled with it and asked to me roll to hit, Natural 20, it did 1d4 damage doubled, i rolled and got max damage for 8, not only that but the DM described it as ricocheting off of the sorcerer's head and returning to my hand. We all had a laugh and continued, but the potion bottle wasn't done yet, the DM quickly made up a magic item and sent it to me in a private message, I had a magic potion bottle of returning. Adanay sheathed it in her belt. Sge used it several more times to deal with inter party arguments, think a mom with a wooden spoon kind of deal. The potion bottle still lives in fear to this day.

[@Silver-jf9vf]

This is one of my favorite nat 20 moments. We (me a few friends) are playing curse of Strahd. So we where coming back during the sun festival and decided to go to the cart, that cart had a saber tooth in it and our DM forgot I had the ritual speak with beast. I decided to try befriending the saber got a few low rolls. Then when we decided to go into the cart, we had to break the lock on the door. So a lock has only a few health points. Now my friend decided it wise to break the lock with the sunsword, nat 20. After that we just fed the saber tooth some rations with a dirty 20. Let’s just say I can call a saber tooth to my hand at any time with a whistle. (Turns out that a Dragonborn ranger with 2 crossbows and at level 6 is really fun to play and a bit hard to keep your health over 20).

[@williamsrdan]

Playing a DnD3.5 druid that specialized in wild shape (quicken metamagic feats). We reached the end of the dungeon and found a huge dragon. I rolled kinda low on intitiative, but got out the free words "I got this." So those with higher initiative than me just moved around the room instead of attacking. My turn: Quicken Baleful Polymorph on the dragon, it Nat1s and becomes a mouse. I quick wild shape into an owl, then swoop down and ate the mouse. But apparently dead Polymorphed creatures revert........ So then the chewed up bits of mouse explode out of owl-me's chest as shredded bits of dragon and owl feathers. (I was totally ok with that death)

[@thearoaceinvadingspace138]

I don’t know if I’ve already commented this story but me and a friend were going through a dungeon and we got to the end to face the cult leader. My friend asked to flirt and “have fun” with the cult leader who was like 90 y/o. Needless to say he rolled a nat 20 and my character stepped out of that room very quickly

[@PistonWorks]

More of this please it's just perfect

[@DistendedPerinium]

Rifts game (sci-fi fantasy post apocalyptic). Party was a godling (physically oriented, very high physical stats), a young dragon who thought he was a ten year old boy (and spent most of his time in that form), a glitter boy pilot (think of a ten foot suit of shiny power armor with a huge gun that would throw the one ton armor back 30 feet if not braced) and a mortal human priest of Ra. The adventure was discovering, then rooting out, a band of vampires from a traveling carnival. Most of the carnival staff had no idea as the vampires who ran the whole thing deliberately kept their numbers low to avoid drawing attention. The adventure arc was brimming with intrigue, a couple of infiltration missions, a stealthy rescue and an impromptu water balloon fight (midday, sans vamps). The whole thing was going well until the party accidentally forced the vampires to reveal themselves, causing the four vampires to flee, as the sun was rising, in off road semi trucks containing their coffins. What followed was the dragon pouncing on a trailer and knocking it over whilst biting and rabbit kicking it like a playful cat. The godling was chasing the other two trucks on foot (fifty or so mph) jumping on, tearing them open and physically tossing the vampires out. The GB pilot had figured out how to use the massive recoil from his gun offensively; shooting at one target while slamming his armor backward into another. The poor priest, meanwhile, was trying to herd innocent carnival attendees and staff away from this maelstrom of technological and supernatural carnage. I think there was an airstrike from the local militia involved at some point too.

[@jeremyrichard2722]

I have a lot of experience with RIFTS, and Palladium in general and I'm not sure if what you describe the Glitter Boy doing is actually viable as in order to fire the GB actually fires anchors from it's feet into the ground to stay in one place. This is part of the justification for the high "Roll With Impact" bonus. I would think if the armor was modified to remove this in an absolute best case scenario he'd be shooting wild, and I don't see how the GB being blown back by a shot into something would do much damage at all given that in most cases the blows from melee weapons wielded by giant robots only do a few D6 MDC overall. Also unlike most RPGs Vampires in that setting are outright immune to damage that doesn't come from certain sources, and neither a blast from the infamous "Boom Gun" or being slammed into by a 10.5' powered armor suit would even damage one, unless the armor or gun rounds were dipped in silver first.... and with the Boom Gun it's a fletchette cannon so it's not like you've just got one projectile to dip viably. At any rate those are minor quibbles about the situation, just bits that confuse me about the narrative. Generally when a GB pilot fights Vampires in particular they are forced to wield other weapons. Also unless they are using planes dropping water or something (like onto a forest fire) why the heck would you ever try and air strike Palladium Vampires. That said, as a final note, as a runner of a fair number of successful RIFTS campaigns over the years, even long after it was popular, I will say I have never known one to NOT go off the rails, even when the GM is incredibly careful with what he allows as PCs.

[@DistendedPerinium]

@@jeremyrichard2722 For the narrative, I had to condense a total of 13+ hours of play time. Some shit got left out. The only ones actually fighting vamps were the godling and dragon. The GB was trying to keep vehicles carrying vampire thralls and accomplices from getting away. As for the Boom Gun recoil (for those unfamiliar, yes, that's what it's called), we were playing the revised edition, so I had house ruled some stuff. The rule I had for the GB recoil suppression system was that it automatically engaged. However, I assumed since rules were in place for if the system was not engaged, that this automatic function could be manually overridden, which the player did. He wasn't doing much, if any damage to stuff he slammed into. He was mainly knocking it around. In MMO terms, he was doing massive DPS while splashing crowd control. This was also a sort of for fun/parody game, so we were playing a bit loose with the rules. The general rule was if it's not stated you can't do it and it's funny, then go for it. And a flying GB playing linebacker with his boom gun was funny. As for going off the rails, I've generally treated Rifts the same way as Paranoia. GotR is never a matter of IF, but WHEN. Shadowrun is kind of the same TBH.

[@terrafirma5327]

I was DMing the session and put a few fairly weak enemies in a dungeon. Go figure though, that the first round of combat the ooze crits and insta-kills a level 1 player. I felt kind of bad since there was no way they could afford resurrection but since they are all veteran players they wanted to figure it out themselves. Cue the trap room... there were three suits of armor in the room and a strange pillar in the middle. If they tried to walk past the pillar, the suits would become animated armor and fight them. The players made successful Perception and Knowledge (Arcana) checks and determined it was a magical trap that would trigger animated armor (which was now identified). What do the players do? They scrub the magical runes off the pillar, steal the animated armor guardians, and took them to the mage's tower to sell. Being as animated armor is heavily enchanted full plate armor... they got a lot of money and easily afforded to resurrect their dead teammate. The dungeon owner also became very mad that they "stole his dungeon" and became an antagonist from that point forward. Also, they never completed the dungeon after stealing the armor.

[@Ekami-chan]

...Yeah, Christmas D&D with plot being saving santa, only to find out he's dead after saw puzzles...That player was justified being pissed and others were huge jerks literally kicking them out, wtf. :'D

[@storyteller-1962]

I have a lot of these, but heres one of the most memorable. We are chasing a very old vpire who is all about disease nd decay, following him into the human empires capital. The inquisition who hates undead are trying to contain the disease and the vampire, and we go to kill him. We try to sneak over to his new lair via the sewers, but accidentally awaken a bunch of antimagic constructs. Bad enough, so we flee to the surface. One long rest later, we find out the sewers are now clean, have no vampires and anyone who goes in doesnt come back out. We go for a head on approach, trying to just kill the vamp in a head on fight. We spend about an in game hour doing so, then long rest while near his stuff. We leave the base and discover a brand new tower in the middle of the capital, constructs everywhere, and now I, a wizard, andthe otherparty casters, cannot leave via magic when we tried to word of recall, use a cursed coin, and get a good arcana check. We slowly start to clear out the city of the constructs that went so far out of control cause we didnt really even try to fight them in the sewers, but it isnt done yet. We finally manage to make it to the top of the tower, fighting one of the big bads of the campaign. Most of the party is fine, but we are running low on resources, so the other wizard comes up with an idea: fire ball the explosive canisters. The dm checks some stuff and the damage is rolled, and I am the ONLY ONE STRUCK BY THIS, but feeling bad, the dm gives shrapnel in the hopes to harm some of the monsters, which hits me twice, two other party members and nothing at all. I am nearly one shot by all this and begin falling to my death from my flying broom, but the artificer saves me with feather fall. The cleric needs to revive me or at least stablize me cause i work for a different big bad they dont want after them yet and thay we are all aware I work for, so he uses the "mummies hand of curses". The dm realizes the boss cant save and has no legendary resistances cause i burned them all, so he gets the curse. Basically, meteor swarm happens... And 3 of the party members are right next to him. With now 4 party members down, 3 up, and 2 of the downed ones basically dead, one of the downed party members points out "arent those explosive canisters next to the boss?" Cue the boss taking 5x his health, 2 party members dying in the initial explosion, the tower beginning to collapse, and the totem barbarian running through the air to avoid falling all the way down. I am barely rescued by the artificer, the cleric finally teleports to safety near the artificer using an item, and the tower finishing its fall, setting off an equivalent of a nuclear bomb in the capital we were still in. In the end, the only living party members are myself, the cleric, and the artificer... Until everyone starts making deals, 2 with THE DEVIL HIMSELF, an angel, and a fey goddess of some kind, now changing the party to have one member fighting for hell, one fighting for heaven, one trying to get the most powerful dragons soul for hell, and the fey boi trying to steal our magic items for his goddess... And get a beast to bite the barbarian who is the one trying to get the dragon soul.

[@luckyowl314]

Thank you for making me laugh

[@feradojuega3450]

That first party was metagaming hard. That's not even clever

[@MattHedgern]

This one game I played back in high school, on our way to our current goal (don't remember what it was but it was story-relevant), one player saw this mausoleum off to the side of the path. They ended up checking it out, with the rest of the party following suit. Cue the rest of the session being a dungeon crawl of the mausoleum, putting the entire story on hold. Then, some time after we left, had that goal taken care of, we're off going to another story-relevant area. None other than the heckin' mausoleum shows up again, and the same shenanigans ensue. This happened so god dang often throughout the campaign, it was ridiculous. But hey, I ain't complaining, I got an enchanted Minecraft sword out of it one time.

[@cheesusabidas77]

in the first story the zombies could just climb onto themselves

[@cheesusabidas77]

"...a dagger named "Nyarlathotep" which was said to be a tentacle cut from Cthulu" you can't blsme the guy who named it, he must have lost all sanity after *cutting a Cthulu's tentacle* so no wonder he got the names mixed up

[@pman37000]

Our party got tasked with investigating something related to an up and coming God and we were told to go north as my barbarian asked some one. however he not so good on directions and thought north was actually west and suddenly were on another continents and are still dealing with those problems a year later

[@KertaDrake]

Ah, the Kobold-salted bomb. The wastelands it produces are filled with radiation that turns anyone who succumbs to it into yappy undead lizards.

[@alganhar1]

Whats with the Pineapple? Specific type of fragmentation grenades, the US Army and British Army used very similar appearing frag grenades during WWII which had an outer shell cast to allow for better fragmentation. They just happened to look vaguely like pineapples, hence they gained that name amongst the troops. The grenades are the British Mills Bomb, and the US Mk II, if you google either of them you will see where the name came from.

[@Phantom-hh6gq]

This was much tamer than I thought it would be

[@winterfire567]

One of my normal players took up the mantle of GM for a single session. She had put together a fun tropical island adventure for us and we were all low level adventurers on vacation after a harrowing boat ride (we were all hired to help guard a merchant ship and got attacked by Sahuagins.) So we're enjoying our generous bonus for making sure the merchant arrived unscathed (think crystal clear waters, gorgeous ruby sunsets, tiki huts and coconut beverages.) We check in with the owner of the local tavern and find him whining about something in the basement eating his stuff, and say we'll take care of the matter, thinking it'll be the standard rats in the basement quest and we'll get a few free rounds or free lodging for the night. So we get down there and start poking around. Turns out "basement" in this case, was a long, rickety staircase down to the beach. The tavern owner had a nice, secluded little cove set aside at the based of a cliff upon which his tavern was built. There were a few tide pools here and there and the place is stacked with barrels of booze and the standard tavern perishables. As we move further in, one of the pools catches our eye, slightly discolored with what looks like an oily film, but not before the pool attacks - a Grey Ooze. Two of them, actually. In one round because of a lucky couple of surprise pseudopod crits, our party's bard goes down, leaving three of us - myself (the fighter), a cleric, and a Chaotic Neutral rogue (in all the worst ways). This is where everything goes wrong. The rogue immediately panics. "Wh-what are these things?" The GM responds, "Make a knowledge roll." Rogue gets a nat 1. "You have no idea. It might as well be a really slimy bear to you." The rogue decides to take this quip quite literally. "Okay! I... I immediately collapse to the floor and poop myself!" When asked why, she responds: "Well, you're supposed to play dead when you encounter a bear right? And when you die you release your bowels!" GM responds with: "....make a deception check." She rolls high, 17 or 18. "You succeed. These things seem to be leaving you alone." Now it's just me and the cleric and we try to fight them for a round, realizing that our metal weapons are starting to corrode. We take a couple of hits, and look at each other. The cleric pulls out a torch and lights it, running back toward the stairs with me following behind. These things looked like they were an oil slick earlier, so they must be weak to fire! She hurls the lit torch at one of them - nat 1. The torch bounces off one of the oozes harmlessly, landing a few feet away - right at the base of one of those booze barrel towers mentioned earlier. The cleric, eyes wide, immediately flees up the stairs with me following. When we get back to the tavern proper, she screams "everyone outside, now!!!" Two rounds later, there's a BOOM as the entire tavern is simultaneously blown off its foundation and engulfed by the fireball. The two people we left down in the basement are absolutely dead, and the cleric is wracked with guilt. My fighter decided the best course of action was to slip out in the confusion and secure other lodging for the rest of her stay, and to not take up any quests that involved basements or alcohol. tldr: In the span of two hours, a fun tropical vacation adventure ended in shock, horror and guilt after two party members died when we accidentally burned down/sank a tavern.

[@patricksocha6930]

Some backstory before getting into it. So, the entire group, before starting session 1 decided we all were going to play as Wild Sorcerer Kenkus who were all half siblings due to our horrible father leading all of us to hate our father. We also decided to use a homebrew Wild Magic Table for the campaign. We eventually found our father and had a brief encounter with him. During the skirmish, one of us used a spell activating Wild Magic. Suddenly the entire room started to fill with Watermelons causing damage to anyone within range. This not only gave the Father time to escape but also killed to of the party members in the process of trying to escape the room being filled with Watermelons.

[@dylanmcafee6679]

the Pineapple was a hand grenade joke

[@Lolholm]

Just had a moment spiral out of control last session, minor spoilers for Rise of Tiamat ahead: The group consist of: Me a human swashbuckler rogue and the least important character for this story, a life domain hill dwarf cleric, and a goliath rune knight fighter. Tldr: Dwarf cleric tries to help lost travellers on the road, ends with us having to flee from a raging wildfire started by our fighter. So we had been tasked by an npc to track down and preferably capture a high ranking member of the dragon cult, and was tracking him through a wilderness when we heard voices coming from further ahead. Our dwarf cleric casts Tongues in order to find out what they are talking about and realise one of them is scolding another for having gotten them lost for the sixth time, now our cleric bless his kind heart decides he wanna help them out, with my rogue being concerned it might take away precious time, but we decide to go along with it, with me and our fighter trying to stay out of sight as our cleric goes talk to them. Now what our cleric finds as he steps out into a clearing, offering to help these fellow travellers, is a band of lizardfolk who immediately spot our goliath fighter because he failed his stealth roll, rather than doing the smart thing and being grateful for the offer of aid, they look at our cleric and fighter and decides that, seeing as they have a significant advantage in numbers they want to take them as slaves. A battle ensues where we soon get the upper hand due to a combination of me consistently hitting shots from stealth, one-shotting or doing serious damage from a hidden position in the dense foilage, our fighter being absolutely deadly himself, and a really good tank, and our cleric being no slouch either, the lizardfolk then decides to form a shield-wall and retreat into the dense foilage on the opposite end of the clearing from where I was sniping them, with mainly me and the fighter giving pursuit. The fighter being the first one inside this dense grass to tall for him to see them, decides to use a magic item he has to blast the area where he can hear them with fire, hitting one of them, but as our DM points out starting a fire in the dry grass between them and us, he decides to yell for us to get out of the grass, and I of course do, on his next turn he then use another charge of that magic item to discourage those lizards from pursuing us. We soon pick up our arrows and thrown weapons and start running the way we were going as the DM rolls for what direction the fire spreads each turn, we soon find ourselves pursued by a raging inferno, but we eventually make it out, slightly singed to a rocky area without vegetation for the fire to spread to, from a vantage point in this area we soon spotted the lizardfolk in the distance, them having been luckier about the direction the fire spread (the fire mostly spread east, we were going northeast, they were on the western side of the fire), that wasn't the last we saw of those lizardfolk but they were a lot less lucky the second time.

[@FizzieWebb]

13:21 Really? Pineapple is a slang term for grenades. A new species of pineapple means the dwarves invented grenades.

[@NXTangl]

Maybe they were Xanth pineapples. That's effectively a very slow nuke...

[@CPTic19]

Oh buddy. I’ve waited for this one. It’s about 11 years ago. My buddies were doing a campaign and wrote me in for a session before I moved. I can’t recall the details but I was a werewolf who had rolled a bit crazy on the character sheet on top of all of the buffs the DM (My room mate at the time) had given me to at least be comparable to the rest of the team as they were much higher level. My character is introduced as a werewolf who had been put to sleep by a spell for a long time and the party accidentally breaks the spell. In a confused Rage I attack the party. My buddy Rory was playing a giant as he’s practically one in real life. So much so we to this day call him ogre. He swings his hammer at me and my response is to block it with one hand. Should I have rolled well it wouldn’t have been a problem. It was a Nat 1. Rory on the other hand rolls a nat 20. The DM starts yelling at me that I just joined the game I can’t die already. He forces Rory to make two more rolls. I was sent through three walls of the dungeon and “knocked out” by Rory rolling 2 more Nat 20s. I think we broke the DM with that one.

[@jonathanmarks3112]

3:49 WHAT? Please explain! 4:20 Creative! 7:40 Oh no. 7:41 Well that alters the campaign. 7:52 If I was DMing, I'd probably eventually be forced to RFED- "Rocks fall; everyone dies." 10:01 *Majora's Mask vibes intensify* 12:45 Whaaaaaaaaat?!?

[@craftsmenMC]

You saying Krampus as “kramp-mas” makes me strangely upset XD

[@LeRodz]

Wasn't looking at the screen and genuinely thought the op had created a monster based on krampus by the way he was saying it.

[@Madchemist002]

It drove me insane. How did that 'm' get there‽

[@danadnauseam]

The pineapple is probably like Buckaroo Bamzai's watermelon.

[@Wargwolf91]

I went alone to try and spirit away a magic book from the BBEG and basically, in order to get away, I had to yell at my Deity... who used a tree to teleport me back to my party, taking my magic away for 3 days (the rest of the session)

[@ashtongiertz8728]

1:31 that's when you pull a world war z and have the zombies start climbing on top of each other.

[@szysi3k]

I read somewhere a similar story to that of Charity the bard. But it was some kind of succubus or other lust abomination and the dude who went with her almost died. It was said that they never tried sexing other NPCs after this.

[@benjaminblackdeath5727]

Krampmus.... Why, do you say it like that?

[@sherylcascadden4988]

More than once... Krampmus instead of Krampus. Spelled right in the text, too.

[@benjaminblackdeath5727]

@@sherylcascadden4988 exactly! I had to pause and read it carefully to see if i was tripping or if the guy made a mistake but noooooo bryan why do you have to torture us like that

[@cheesusabidas77]

and he misspelled Nyarlathotep too

[@LeRodz]

I kinda understand his problem with simulacrum (kinda), but...krampus is such a simple word to pronounce.

[@colinhawley8050]

My Kobold Drunken Master tried to assassinate a Goblin leader , Nat1’d, and ended up hugging him. Two sessions in a row

[@foobietv]

I can only make it to bout 3 mins watching these till I have to fake a heart attack to excuse myself. UnHoly cow !

[@robertpowell1464]

Well, I had planned for the one session to get the party hired to get someone out of prison and escort him to the commissioners ship. Pretty straightforward, even wrote out if they decided to talk to the warden what bail would be. From the get go, the party didnt trust the commissioner, split into two groups, spent a long time shopping for mostly useless items, then when one of them sent a message via magic two of them thought aliens were speaking to them and panicked. Now they are outside the prison at night in the rain contemplating how to break in to a facility that is not just a prison, but also a garrison for the whole north of the kingdom. Why I expected it to be an easy in and out I dont know.

[@Ackbano]

In my homebrew, goblins are made of soup. Hundreds of years ago a wizard tried to make a perfect homunculi assistant with all his intelligence since he didn't trust anyone. The creature stole the recipe and ran, attempting to make a companion, but didn't have the right ingredients so it needed to use substitutes. Each subsequent goblin used lower and lower quality substitutions, leading them to eventually become the hot mess of a species they are. "Cauldroners" are a type of adventurer/exterminator job where you steal or destroy a goblin tribes cauldron so they can't make more. My players were hired as cauldroners by a town that would pay handsomely to end the stolen livestock and kidnapped children. In the woods they found a child being attacked by wolves, that was actually a runty goblin with a dent in his head. He was kicked from the tribe for being a liability, and was easily tricked by the party to guide them past the traps and to the Soup Mother to convince her to let him back in. Once there, the party starts wiping out the goblins, but stop when the paladin realizes they're protecting the young, and there's no actual sign of kidnapping victims. Turns out the mayor made up the missing children report so they could get priority in clearing out the goblins, as there's precious ore under their encampment. I thought "hey, they're starting to see that this campaign is gonna have a lot of moral grey areas, cool". I expected them to fake wiping the camp, let them escape, then collect the reward and go home. INSTEAD, the paladin is appalled at the realization that goblins aren't inherently evil, but are closer to refugees that never had a nation of their own. But she won't let them continue stealing to survive, either. Rather, she and the rest of the party used the goblins to quickly mine some of the ore, used the money to buy wagons and supplies, and have since moved with ~40 goblins into an abandoned town to start a new city-state, with the ultimate goal of goblin representation in the Courts.

[@dethkruzer]

Soup goblins. Was not expecting that.

[@Ackbano]

@@dethkruzer highly recommend, it's SUPER FUN. Typically goblins are a level 1-3 enemy and get stale super quick. But since each goblin tribe uses whatever they can get their hands on as "soup ingredients", every tribe is at least a little different. Goblins that live near rivers and lakes use more dead fish and frogs as a main source of raw material, leading to somewhat amphibious "aquablins". Cave dwellers end up pale, sometimes sightless, but with an innate sense of direction and tremorsense. Goblin tribes that gather the dead after human battles end up with hobgoblins: larger and more humanoid, forgetting their old lives but somehow retaining the muscle memory of combat and the knowledge of war tactics. The tribes that are competent enough to take out large beasts can create their own bugbears to bolster their ranks further. As a DM they're fantastic for flavoring, allowing for tons of interesting combats as they can "evolve" into nearly any niche within just a few generations. The only reason they don't have more power than they do is that most nations immediately squash them if they get too noticeable, and if they can't get their hands on good raw material their ranks are severely hindered. I've given them way too much thought, I really like goblins as a concept and world building is what I do when I should be being productive...

[@klasodeth]

My party once had the situation spiral out of control twice in the same mission. We were trying to hunt down an evil cult that was operating out of an otherwise legitimate woodworking business. The complication was that a magic altar was onsite that would continuously regenerate the cultists if they were in range, making them immortal. This wasn't the first cult cell we had encountered with this sort of arrangement, so we knew how difficult the situation was. Our plan was to sneak in after hours to locate and destroy the alter before the cultists could intervene. At first the plan went quite well. Avoiding patrols, we located the secret basement containing the altar. Using the plentiful woodworking tools and lumber, we decided to make improvised barricades to trap the cultists inside their rooms. Unfortunately, a patrolling cultist started walking our way, so we had to temporarily stop what we were doing and hide. Unfortunately, this guy was the Sherlock Holmes of carpentry, and immediately detected inconsistencies with the placement of tools and lumber. He immediately put the base on high alert, forcing us to engage in battle with many of the still-immortal cultists. We could take them down to 0 HP, but they'd soon regenerate enough to rejoin the fight. As we tried to figure out an exit plan, inspiration struck! I cast Moonbeam in a back room, then put myself on corpse duty. Pico, my Tabaxi Druid, had Feline Agility and Boots of Speed, and could move very quickly even when dragging a body. As the rest of the party cut down the cultists, I grabbed the bodies and tossed them into my Moonbeam, relying on the damage from the Moonbeam to counter their regeneration. We soon had the cultists defeated--but only until my Moonbeam ran out, and I could only cast a few of those. With only minutes of time to act at most and no restraints available to us, I had the party break away the flooring to reveal the earth underneath. A few castings of Mold Earth later and we had a large pit. We quickly stripped the cultist bodies of all their possessions, then tossed them into the pit before filling in the pit. Now that we had regained control of the situation, we turned our attention to the altar. Knowing it had other powerful defenses, we knew we needed to destroy it as quickly as we could before the regenerating defenses overwhelmed us. We decided to use what we called "large fire cylinders". They were actually rockets from a technological society, but all we knew is that they could explode. Without understanding just how powerful the explosion would be, I recommended using two of the rockets. Our fighter/wizard, Raseri, was concerned about the potential size of the blast, so we arranged for the main explosion to occur behind the alter and we took cover behind the walls outside the room. We launched a fireball to initiate the explosion and... BOOM!!! The earth shook as we all experienced a blinding flash of white light! The explosion did more than twice my maximum HP, enough to kill Davac and I outright! Luckily, our GM had introduced Fate Points at the beginning of the campaign, and we had previously earned enough of them to allow us to survive the otherwise instantly fatal explosion, each with a mere 1HP. But we weren't out of the woods yet. Instead of the two-level woodworking business above us, we now had an unobstructed view of the night sky--and the flaming wreckage that was beginning to rain down around us. Complicating our escape was the very large group of people who rushed the scene of the explosion, including many guards. I cast Conjure Animals to summon Giant Badgers and Wild Shaped into one myself, digging an escape tunnel that allowed us to flee without being seen. We promptly hid our remaining cache of rockets, then healed up and did our best to pretend that everything was fine. Our troubles didn't end there, as everyone in town was talking about the massive explosion. The explosion exposed the bodies of the now-dead cultists, which the authorities promptly interrogated via Speak With Dead. The dead cultists ratted us out, which wouldn't have been a problem except for the use of dangerous technological artifacts--artifacts we secretly withheld from our employers. We were immediately summoned to report on our mission. Led by an amazing act of deception by Raseri, we managed to convincingly bluff our way into blaming the cultists for causing the explosion, salvaging the situation in a way that didn't result in serious political fallout for us.

[@0PercentImagination]

So a small bit of context a campaign I was playing in had a large city not too far from where we were at the moment, we actually needed to go there at some point to report an incident that had happened outside the city but for now we were at a much smaller place run by someone named dawn. After we manage to prevent an incident from occuring within this town (or whatever it was) the party decides to have a rave party complete with hallucinogenic drugs we just happened to have because a player had it in their backstory they were a drug dealer and the dm found it amusing. However it all went horribly wrong when my character innocently helped convince Dawn to take some of the drugs. What the players didn't know, but the dm had already written, is that Dawn was actually the avatar of the real one who was in hiding and rather unstable mentally. So when the dm started rolling secret dice to see if the real her would be affected by the acid trip her avatar was on we knew something was up. A couple more big dice rolls and a few Oh no's from the dm later the real Dawn reveals themselves to essentially be a huge dragon-like creature that in their drug boosted insanity lays waste to their own settlement before flying off towards the next closest place that had people. And so with more secret rolls we later on learn of the complete and total destruction of the city we were meant to go to and pretty much all of its civilians. The kicker is that it was a joke that my character had spent most of his life sleeping around and starting families, the first family I was meant to re-unite with was in the city however the dm rolled a 1d100 to see if they survived and they got a 1 revealing they were actually the first victims...

[@tius_thus_reborn]

Well... I was DMing a homebrew campaign, in my world's equivalent of 1750-s. Party came together in this city-trade hub, under the long siege from the flying giant bearded bats. The first problems began when the I fucked up the difficulty of the first encounter in the catacombs under the city river, killing two characters and making party run with third unconscious on their hands (there were seven of lvl4 PCs of them at the beginning, so I overestimated their fighting prowess a little bit). They assumed that the man that contracted them to clear out the sewers send them to die. They were not very wrong, the man was indifferent to their fate (he was a mage ruling the city and supposed to be a shifty suspicious type), but they took that personally and attacked the man in the middle of compensations negotiation. The mage was 18 level and had sword that ignored the armor (it assumed target AC as 10+DEX for the attack), but of course, the group that struggled with 10 thugs and one Warlock with seven members took on CR 12 Wizard with 9th level spellslot with 4 lvl4 PC's with exhausted spellslots and abilities and practically won, forcing now de-facto BBEG of the campaign to use Timestop TO ESCAPE. Queue the escape from the castle, capture of the one of the party members (one who did nothing both of the fights, by the way), some work for the local thieves guild, brilliant bullshittery and bullshit brilliant rolls for History and Persuasion by the captured PC in court to be left under the house arrest for the time of the investigation. But it was nothing but a introduction for the final episode of "shit goes sideways". After some time, the party discovered that their member was, in fact, not in jail but under house arrest and decided to visit her. In the process two of the party, the Barbarian and the Warlock got heated and Barbarian physically shutted the mouth of the Warlock. Being a criminal with connections in a different from thieves guild organisation, Warlock decided to right this wrong by killing the Barbarian with mafia goons and taking his obscene amount of gold he accumulated. After connecting with the "lost" party member they become the target of the deadly ambush by the City Mage's man. Everyone being on the edge they return to their base and begin to roleplay the blame game, in the process of which the Warlock tries to sneak away (to say to his goons that they need to change the position of the ambush on the Barbarian), unsuccessfully. Barbarian, being already suspicious of the Warlock, just goes into rage immediately, and in the campaign this means that he can't do non-lethal damage. The Bard of the party, who was holding on her sanity by a thread from the beginning of the campaign decided that situation became unsalvageable and shoots herself in the head with her cavalry pistol. .50 led bal, autocrit, party Cleric can't ever Revivify her because there is no more head. With this blame game somewhat stopped, as Warlock spent all of his temporary spellslots gained by sacrificing the head of local church ti his Patron to escape with his life and Cleric roleplayed the faith-losing moment, and I decided to wrap up the campaign as is, before more murder-suicides and edgy "I kill you" shinenigans. Was able to give them all pretty cool epilogues though.

[@T4N7]

So the first pathfinder game I ever played had a dwarf psyonic who was a soldier whose entire unit was killed by a larger mechanical beast of a thing, n then the elf druid found n healed him as part of their backstory. Well a few sessions go by n we have just gotten to level 4 after winning every top spot in some festival tournaments n got these magical tattoos (never did find out wut they do cuz this was the last session before the game dissolved) n as we left the stadium we heard a loud crash n screams. Then we saw the mechanical beast n the GM expected to have a scene of this thing causing some hail before either we fled or it dipped (iunno wut its motivation was) but instead the dwarf decided to charge in like Leeroy Jenkins n got swatted aside n crashed thru a few vendor's carts taking like 40 damage n nearly killing him. The GM just said, I had about 10-20 more mins planned but we'll have to stop there for tonight cuz I did not expect u to fight it. "U didn't expect him to fight it? Seriously?"

[@pedrolopez8057]

Old Man Henderson. not DnD but in a class of its own

[@norokodven4768]

If I had to guess I would say the pineapple is filled with nitroglycerin

[@arnoldschpeiker7887]

Lost it at the pineapple bit.

[@waluigiisgod938]

First one is a wee bit meta-gamey, but I respect it

[@pulsefel9210]

im curious about "a nuke powered by kobolds"

[@joemono4727]

Hmm. Curse of Straud. Was a dhamphir gnome that accidentally became a kidnapper. The kids description was misleading... What can I say. There was the only indication from the gm" this kid is 6 ft about 180, 200 lbs of pure muscle..." Also made a big boi by accident and forgot about it. Pretty much blew up the campaign... Not allowed to play robots who tinker with corpses anymore for that reason.

[@otakubancho6655]

The new pineapple is the same inside,but it's smooth outside,and it stinks like rotten fish!😱😱😱

[@byrontheusurper6505]

Krampus, not Krampmas!

[@anabominationagainstman3597]

MY PLAYER ATE A MAN MADE OF PIZZA HUT PIZZA.

[@LeRodz]

What version of DnD is that where the zombies are described as only reaching for the closest food source regardless of reach? Is that from 5e? Because really seems like something the DM should have a say about instead of just running as presented. also htf was a ghost in prison

[@camile0074]

Hey, Mr. Ripper! Did you know you have followers from Brazil? Yes, I'm one of them; and no, nobody asked, but I thought it would be nice for you to know your content is traveling overseas, and also to non english speaking countries 😊 I enjoy your videos very much, ty for your effort!

[@Lumberjack_king]

12:11 no!

[@Karagianis]

I wonder how you make a supercritical Kobold?

[@minimishapsgames894]

I gave the Ranger a longsword that could do necrotic damage. That should have been the end of a very short and boring story... Ranger: Why does it do necrotic? GM: Um... I guess it was once cursed by a demon. Ranger: I TRY TO CONTACT THE DEMON! (nat 20 religion check ensues) GM pauses, then as a confused demonic phone teller voice: ... Hello? How are you contacting the Nine Hells? It says on your call that you found some kind of cursed weapon? Ranger: I want to talk to the demon that cursed this blade! Confused voice: Oh, well it says here on the file that the demon you are looking for perished long ago. Disappointed Ranger: Can you connect me to another demon that I could talk to with my sword? Voice: I can try, please hold. (rolls) Yes, I have another demon on the line for you, I'll connect you. Substitute Demon: Hi, I have the communicate through weapon ability, what do you need? Excited Ranger: What kind of Demon are you? Substitute: (rolls) A demonic bear. Extra excited Ranger: Perfect! I hereby swear allegiance and become your living vessel in the Real, please give me quests. ...And this kicked off three years of real time for this character doing everything from confronting another bear demon to discovering set items in a race with another demon-sworn that eventually became a love interest and on and on it went. All from the most basic of swords given in the most lazy of treasures.

[@jackreynolds3465]

This is the video I was waiting for! So our party was sent to deal with a dragon. We arrive and our druid decided to seduce the dragon. It worked! So he was stalling the dragon until our party could escape. Our DM had an NPC character named Helga, who had no idea what was happening and decided to attack the dragon. Our DM thought we could handle it but boy was he wrong! He ended up starting the "Helga civil war", to mend the situation I decided to attack Helga to stay on the dragons good side. I picked her up and placed in the arms of our druid so he could sacrifice her to the dragon, again since I didn't want to be on the dragons bad side and since Helga screwed us over. Now the rest of our party was very against it and we all fought until the dragon just decided to blast us all with poison. It got so bad that the DM just decided to retcon the whole thing lol!

[@JacobL228]

5:02 It's "Krampus", not "Krampmus". 7:40 That should have been more like "he came before he could even get his pants off". Impregnating her sounds like it would be a nat 20 result if anything. 8:48 The "h" is silent. In fact, it's usually written as "Baal". The name refers to the first and most powerful of the 72 demons of the Ars Goetia. 9:33 Nyarlathotep is an Outer God in the Cthulhu Mythos, and is the spawn of Azathoth, another Outer God. It has almost nothing to do with Cthulhu, a Great Old One. Also, yes, its name is very hard to pronounce. You said "Narlothep", which is a few letters off. 12:44 This is a pet peeve of mine; it's pronounced "nuclear", not "nucular".

[@rubycrown3891]

KRAMPMUS?!

[@electromancer2645]

"My deception is so high I convinced an innocent man he just killed someone".... That is not how deception or skill checks work. I hate playing in games like this.

[@scorch2155]

Way to many people think charisma based checks are mind control and its annoying.

[@45potato95]

So the bathhouse cultists. Would that DM happen to be Christian? I recall a certain Bible story on Mt. Carmel pertaining to bhaal

[@CooperAATE]

That first story is boring lol

[@danielhale1]

The new type of pineapple was obviously how they were refining Uranium. I liked the Cthulhu campaign. Seemed like a cool idea, and I'm sad it ended in player arguments.

[@irxosm1]

Ok

[@lt32p1]

1st one is the worst kind of metagaming.

[@vikrambal6247]

First

[@postapocalypticnewsradio]

Such speed!

[@Greatsword585]

woah