What most “experts” get wrong about self-defense

[@Sovvolf]

Hello guys I'm Steven. The fellow who wrote the message and thank you for featuring it Ramsey Dewey. Think the big reason I didn't go for a choke or a grapple more than anything else is that... Maybe to you and I and those that understand grappling to some extent. We'd understand that it's a relatively harmless move meant to subdue with doing as little damage as possible. To a house full of family and friends, who are also pretty drunk. Getting someone in a rear naked choke... its probably not going to go down well... Here I just blocked, evaded and kept the attacker away. Using my training until we could escape the area safely. Because then, in front of everyone, specially when taking witness statements. It looks very clear that I did nothing that could be construed as an assault. Sadly the relationship with that family member is pretty scarred at this point. Though social services have stepped in with my niece and they and myself have been keeping a close eye on her. Was a bad night. Ruined Christmas. Ruined some relationships but I can take it. I'll take the hits because I can take it. I spent a few hours in a cell. Kid got away safe. Goal achieved

[@darrylsmith452]

Hi Steven! 🤗 I'm so very sorry to hear that this situation ever arose that forced you into this turn of events! Whenever social services get involved it is well documented that it was NOT always a good outcome! Please keep an extra vigilant eye on your niece and don't trust ANYONE!!! Look after yourself and those you love and care about! I would like to say more, but it would be deleted! So take care mate and know that you did GOOD that day! 👍🤗❤

[@solutionsforabrightfuture3579]

It's such a problem with cops wanting to handcuff and throw everyone in jail accept themselves.

[@BFGalbraith74]

When I was working security I resolved a handfull of attacks with circular footwork and head movement. Going hands on with strikes or a big throw or choking them wasn't neccessary and would have caused more problems for everyone involved.

[@Wittemn]

I had to put someone in a rear naked choke once in a public environment to realize what you said here. Common people will think you actually want to kill that person. It is indeed a technique that has to be used very wisely outside of the mats.

[@farkinarkin5099]

Hey, Mr Skelly, you did the best thing possible in a very difficult situation. Even if the assailant was not a family member, you recognized that if at all possible, do no harm (cue the Master Kan speech about "all life is precious"). I really hope that things heal over. The guy would not have tapped out, and for all you know there could have been complications. Again you did the best thing possible. Live well, train hard and thank you.

[@stanleylee5358]

Most assailants are known to the victim. Most murderers are known to the victim. Most rapists are known to the victim. Most robbers are known to the victim. Knowing how to fight is great but setting boundaries with the people in your life will get you more mileage for the time you spend.

[@michaelsanterre4208]

Well said Stanley.

[@skaruts]

I don't think that's true of robbers, though. I've experienced many robberies from strangers, and very few from acquaintances, and I think that's the norm. Of other kinds of theft, like con-tricks, you might have a point, but only if by _"known to the victim"_ you mean it loosely, as in including con-artists which are people who don't necessarily know the victim but the victim knows and trusts them. Some cons only propagate between friends and acquaintances (like pyramid schemes), but most cons don't. I don't think victims are usually acquainted with fraudsters, though.

[@jwhippet8313]

Fun fact: The two most likely people to murder you are your mother and yourself. If you can make it to 12 months old, the threat your mother poses drops off sharply. Makes it hard to stay safe by avoiding the most threatening people.

[@jaketheasianguy3307]

It's a sad reality that the law against violence around the world were mostly made by people who don't understand violence or haven't even experience violence. Putting people in jail just because they defended themselve without hurting the attacker by choking them unconscious is just plain stupid

[@manubishe]

Precedent. It's all about cowards making a precedent, and conservatives relying on said precedent, or simply lazy/unaware people. If you're not afraid of pondering about yourself as being violent, and/or finding violence around you as acceptable, then rethink what violence is, and bear the responsibility of living in novel terms, amidst people who'd rather accept the old version of "violence".

[@ratillecebrasquedubitantiu4451]

Like many police in the US, that only use extreme violence to protect themselves and others.

[@ratillecebrasquedubitantiu4451]

@@manubishe conservatives? It's usually progressive laws that punish the defensive individual

[@manubishe]

@@ratillecebrasquedubitantiu4451 Relying on precedents, and acting on autopilot, without straying off the beaten path, Is being conservative. Suggesting that choking out a person is better than breaking his jaw, and facial bones, would be quite the rebellion.

[@tzaeru]

On the other end, would probably be just as or more so sad if laws regarding violence were made by people whose primary credential was being good in violence. Firstly I will say that I am a quite skeptical about the claims that people were put to jail simply for defending themselves from a violent attacker when they caused no permanent damage on them. I've not really seen many verified cases of this. Maybe it's happened a few times, but it doesn't seem very common at all. Googling right now, I can't find a single case of someone being put to jail for choking someone unconscious in self-defense, though I did find this: metro.co.uk/2019/04/10/worker-cleared-of-choking-boss-to-death-because-it-was-self-defence-9144932/ Secondly, laws are a complicated thing, and one important thing to note is that law and punishment is supposed to direct behavior in the long term. If you allow one person to choke someone unconscious in a situation that wasn't a true acute life-or-death situation, then you're basically allowing everyone else to do the same. And a lot of the time that's not going to go so well. There's lots of violent people out there working as bouncers, security guards, or just looking for fights off the street, who try to claim self-defense on anything, and the less likely they are to successfully do that, the better. And even a trained person can kill or seriously injure someone with a choke. It's a high octane situation, adrenaline rushing in your veins, and there's no referee. You end up holding a blood choke several seconds longer than necessary and it is possible to damage the arteries or cause a stroke. This very rarely - almost never - happens to trained athletes, but those people are subjected to chokes under a controlled environment and they also tend to be physically fit, which does lend some significant protection. I don't think you should choke someone unconscious unless that's the only way you can realistically keep yourself safe in that situation. In the situation described on e.g. this video, I would imagine that if you're in a position to choke them out, you're also in a position to simply control them until the police arrives.

[@Codac6]

This reminds me when people say "There are no rules on da streetz" Of course there are, they're called laws 🙃

[@Sovvolf]

Anyone who says "There's no rules on da streetz" has had to sit in front of two police officers asking you to justify what you did as reasonable force. Even when no strikes on my part was thrown. The police don't seem to give a shit about someones power fantasy.

[@Jono793]

^^ This!

[@Groteskfull]

Law of da streetz 😎

[@wilfordgrimley4339]

The law doesn't stop someone from stomping your skull into the concrete. The law womt prevent your family from losing you whether the attacker is punished or not. Damage is done. Prison wont bring you back. The point of saying "there are no rules on the streets" is to point out that human beings are capable of some crazy shit and you'll never know what until they display it for you. Laws don't assure your attacker getting caught. They cant be compared to rules inside a ring that are INSTANTLY enforced.

[@Codac6]

@@wilfordgrimley4339 Then go ahead, break the law.

[@stevensonchambers5577]

The biggest mistake everyone makes is always envisioning ideal, react-able scenarios where one is mentally and emotionally prepared to appropriately defend yourself

[@OrfinMusik]

Bro I appreciate your insight, a lot of people would just say do “A,B, or C” without considering the ramifications of doing those things legally, and their lives may be unjustly ruined because of their ignorance of their local laws while trying to really do the morally right thing.. Thank you for your honesty there’s a reason I enjoy listening to your insight and the consideration you’ve shown today is the exact reason why I love hearing from you. Cheers man.

[@MassiveSwingingProductions]

Hey coach just wanted to let you know I ran further than I have before since the quarantine. Your videos are super motivational to me and are helping me get the covid weight off. You rock dude!

[@OG_Fireflare]

Keep it up! Good work!

[@franciscohuber5264]

Let's go man!!

[@ttctexas9714]

You wanna race me

[@MassiveSwingingProductions]

Heck yeah dude

[@ives3572]

Unlike combat sports techniques and maneuvers which are tried and tested over and over again in fights, self-defense techniques and maneuvers are not that really tried and tested. The only time those techniques and maneuvers are tried and tested is when you are least expecting it, which is a great disadvantage.

[@zachariahz]

That's why it's best to listen to operators and people who have actually been around that stuff (Mick Coup, Geoff Thompson etc.), then integrate that knowledge, rather than just listening to martial artists - even those that compete/fight. Martial artists have a tendency to try to shape their idea of how non-consensual violence happens around their martial arts training, competitive history etc, and often it's not a very realistic fit, unless they've been there themselves. In short, being a martial artist( even a high caliber one) does not make someone a subject matter expert on self defense.

[@BFGalbraith74]

I agree 100%, though strategy should be significantly different.

[@ricksterdrummer2170]

They have however been battle tested. Just not against modern combat sports. That’s what both self-defense people and MMA people get wrong. “Self-defense systems” are made to handle pre-fight scenarios like a push, a threatening grab or a suckerpunch, NOT a guy jumping around in a fighting stance. We need to realize a system like Japanese Jiu-Jitsu was designed to handle rapists and robbers from the 15th century or so. Wing Chun was designed by a woman to fight against Kung-Fu. No self-defense system is fake or untested. Most are just outdated and haven’t evolved. Those are the facts.

[@zachariahz]

@@ricksterdrummer2170 The counter to this argument is that unlike martial arts and combat sport, non-consensual violence hasn't changed all that much, discounting things like firearms.

[@ricksterdrummer2170]

@@zachariahz That’s actually very incorrect. It has indeed changed. 9 out of 10 bullies knows how to do a roundhouse kick and a rear naked choke. Not pretty but effective enough to get the job done. In the time of “traditional martial arts” this was not the case.

[@pst5345]

You cannot choose your relatives but surely can choose your family.

[@ttctexas9714]

But what if your family is also your relatives? 🤔

[@eldudemp6195]

@@ttctexas9714 that's good too, maybe even better because you're probably gonna spend more time with your relatives than with anyone else

[@emmanueltavares4823]

@@ttctexas9714 its the same thing, but thats not what he's implying. "We may be related by blood, but we are not family". You can choose your family. My best and closest friends to me are family, but we are not blood related. Same goes for anyone who is blood related, but to you personally they were never or nor longer family.

[@Sovvolf]

One thing I don't think I mentioned in my email and should maybe make mention here. Something that's also not talked about often: The guilt. Man, I was sat in that cell feeling guilty. For days after the situation I was feeling guilty. Hell, even now to this day my head asks if I did the right thing. I think most people expect to come out of a genuine attack like this feeling an absolute bad arse. Like "Yeah, I'm the hero, I saved the day" its really not the case at all. Even though on a rational level, me stepping in and taking the hits and stopping the child from getting hurt should be a no brainer. My head doesn't think like that. Some of my family even turned on me for it because they either didn't understand the context and thought I shouldn't have got involved (The whole bystander effect there I guess). Even in what should be a clear cut situation, there's consequences. I didn't even start training again until a few days ago because something in me said I wasn't worthy of it. That's probably the roughest part about it all.

[@JR-sz7dw]

When you KNOW you can handle yourself...You tend to worry about others more than yourself. Your ego gets armor after you train and get fight experience. If you care about people, their safety becomes more important than your own.

[@jamestickle3070]

Reason I switched over from kickboxing to BJJ. To control uncle Billy without bloodying his face up. That said, glad I had some striking so I know realistic ranges. BJJ always starts too close.

[@wearblackclothes]

This story hit home. My mom used to be that angry drunk relative on a Wednesday afternoon. I started jujitsu when i was 15 and thought i could stop her but she was my mom. The only time i actually did she was literally pissed drunk and tried to get in the car and to this day i still get lip from her side of the family for it.

[@realitycheckselfdefence7840]

Absolutely - Just another reason why context is so important. Rich Dimitri raises many of the same points when he talks about real world violence - You don't want to hurt the people you care for, but you also don't want to die, very hard to train for that mental barrier.

[@Sovvolf]

See, when I wrote this message, that's what was in my head. I've been at a lot of different gyms in my years and trained a lot of different styles. Some that have offered self defense style classes and some that don't. I've yet to come across any that have handled such a difficult topic and yet, as Ramsey Dewey rightfully points out, you're probably going to end up in this situation with a family member more often than some stranger. I mean, it's so easy to dehumanise the attacker, specially where in most situations we're picturing a blank faceless attacker (or masked attacker) that you don't really think about what you're going to do when the attacker is a loved one. Thankfully in this situation I managed to get out of it without hurting anyone and just kept with the mantra of "Protect yourself at all times". Also the Thai long guard (which I usually use to set up shots) was surprisingly effective at just creating distance and stopping this person from getting any clean shots. Also I check out your channel quite often. I'm a big fan. So thanks for your insight mate.

[@ratillecebrasquedubitantiu4451]

Ramsey, you're so smart about these sorts of things. You should definitely make a series about these kinds of things if you have time.

[@kuragui5quero]

Thanks for raising awareness about legal implications. Once someone tried to rob me with an alleged "pistol" that was covered by clothes, Adrenaline kicked in and I got really angry and because the guy was smaller and really nervous I thought I could gain his back and hurt him before he could use his "pistol". Fortunately I just took some breadth and decided that it was not worth it, i didn't give him my stuff but neither showed resistance. When I didn't move his nerves betrayed him and uncovered the "pistol" to show me he wasn't actually armed and left. Have I attacked him I would had have a terrible time justifying myself legally for attacking an unarmed assailant. In a second you can go from the defender to the aggressor.

[@GuitarsRockForever]

Well, good point about friends or family members. However, if it is really bad, you have to do what you have to do. Sometimes, there can be no choice (certainly hope that situation never happens).

[@scottt7309]

I remember watching a video by Iain Abernathy who explained the difference between martial arts and self defence. One of the points he raised was learning the laws of self defence where you live. I'm glad to see that you are also sending out that message. Needs to be said alot more than it is.

[@gokussj397]

Great video! I'm a 'certified self defence instructor', but never thought about this. I'm actually a little bit ashamed about my training anyway (not because of this, but because of the lack of fighting skills) and wouldn't return teaching nowadays, but they never talked about this.

[@kenh.5903]

Once at a family reunion I had to try to control a family member that was going crazy. We rolled around throwing punches and kicks and I was hit over the head with several drinking glasses. My grandma is a serious bad a$$.

[@johnathannelsonento2040]

I get this entirely. Not too long ago I interceded in a domestic issue. this was the second time, but this time the guy tried to fight me. I dabble in judo and boxing, so I was pretty confident I could deal wth the situation, but I had to make the decision not to hurt this guy and leave the situation because I had people I'd have to answer to.

[@tiunchampion9681]

Love your channel

[@RamseyDewey]

Thanks!

[@stephanwatson7902]

What have soldiers done for thousands of years when disarmed and faced with a sword? Wrestle...grappling is a large unknown part of sword fighting

[@IamJigle]

When they are disarmed facing a sword they just get killed or run away lol

[@stephanwatson7902]

@@IamJigle very untrue, alot of swordfights turn into grappling anyway. No soldiers didnt just turn and run every time when they're disarmed, that's a good way to get a sword in the back buddy. Go watch the fencing instructor Matt Easton if you want to know more about actual historical swordfighting. How the hell would you turn and run in formation with soldiers all around and behind you? Do you say "Excuse me fellow soldiers, I just got disarmed in an instant and now have milliseconds before my enemy stabs me with his sword! Could you please make room so I can turn and run?" If you get disarmed and your opponent is still right infront of you, you're best option is either backstep if you can and look for an opening, or close in to grapple so they cant swing

[@IamJigle]

@@stephanwatson7902 hence my comment- they either get KILLED or run away.

[@aqdjbcr]

Glad I know Jitsu so I don’t have to hurt them if I don’t want to

[@js1741]

I ended an altercation between my father and little brother. To be clear, my father wasn't abusing young children. Little bro was an adult and being a huge ass, and my father lost control, put him in a schoolyard bully headlock, and started punching. I know you don't have a high opinion on eye gouging in self defense, but I found it highly effective and an immediate fight stopper. It doesn't work in the way "reality based" instructors say it does, driving your fingers into the attackers skull to mutilate them; that's bs as you've pointed out in earlier videos. Rather, humans are so instinctually averse to eye damage that they will drop what they're doing on reflex and pull away. Other than some temporarily blurred vision, dad was fine.

[@ArtofOneDojo]

FANTASTIC discussion Sir. You covered some absolutely critical information here, thank you for doing this topic and putting it out.

[@Sovvolf]

Just passing by here and wanted to say I'm a big fan of your show. It's a great watch and very much inspires me as a martial artist. Keep it up.

[@stephanwatson7902]

There are rules in a street fight and they change given circumstance, they're called laws

[@ThirdPointInLine]

I love the way Ramsey speaks, and also the way the video is just one honest continuous take

[@gwaffa]

I love watching your channel. I have learned so much, and I like how you bring out the human aspect to this issue.

[@vellitical1532]

i love your videos and advice, would love to have you as my coach as i have learned so much from you so thank you Ramsey.

[@dylanmorgan5589]

I thought self defense in a home was putting on a gas mask and breaking the valve on the chlorine gas tank. Or am i weird for having a chlorine gas talk?

[@RamseyDewey]

Do you make that a habit at family holiday gatherings?

[@dylanmorgan5589]

No. Still on tank one. My family has been behaving........so far.

[@Discalle112]

I dont train anymore but instill watch your videos. I just love that you talk alot about theory and not just the physical. Great stuff

[@gnomenorthofthewall1982]

Good video and an important one. Also one point, in many cases, there is the option, if you have the skills, to just keep the attacker on the ground until he/she runs out of steam and anger or the police arrive. This of course depends on the situation and attacker. Unfortunately usually self defense "experts" just try to teach how to really hurt the "bad" guy

[@MER_Metal_Catto]

What I really love about martial arts is that they give me the chance to control someone without putting them in the ER.

[@jayve4433]

Awesome, another great video on important info, you are right on what you say, definitely something all self defense programs or teachers need to talk about

[@permadsen1479]

The three best self-defense techniques you can learn is: Laws on self-defense Situational awareness Conflict De-escalation

[@rayedjualidan1504]

Thanks Mr. Dewey this was one of your best episodes. Now I need to go check the self defense laws in my city 😅

[@solutionsforabrightfuture3579]

Wow that is what I call a total bad*** when he was able to defend himself and kids without hurting the other person. That's a superpower. The best motivation to learn Muia thia. To see that in real life not even the attacker is harmed.

[@noobiesensei6281]

I mostly think it's the big coat. Armor helps. Especially since he didn't allow himself to strike back.

[@daniel-zh9nj6yn6y]

Maybe the one with the stick was an aunt, so it wasn't that hard.

[@Sovvolf]

@Brad Thomas Yeah I was lucky to have been wearing a winter coat and also a thick jumper underneath it which took a lot of the sting out of the blows. Think if anything it wasn't the toughness from training that helped just the ability to keep calm while being attacked.

[@dloobo2381]

Rory Miller addresses this is his Book "Facing Violence: Preparing for the Unexpected", a very good Book.

[@SamBamSalam]

Ah yes! Adress your "glitches". What if the attacker isn't a big bad stereotype? But like in this case, a family member. Or what if it is a woman, pregnant woman, child or mentally disabled person? How would you respond?

[@dloobo2381]

@@SamBamSalam exactly, there is often no happy ending to this situations, but if you are aware of it you have the oportunity to make a gameplan in advance for such an situation, how you would act if it happens. for example if you're mentally ill child try's to stab you and you're options are using deadly force or dying. you may chose the later or if you where aware of such a possibility you may would be even able to prepare in advance to evade it. don't think that self defense will definitely save you, it will increase your chance, it's not some kind of superpower. by the way sorry for my poor english not my first language.

[@SamBamSalam]

@@dloobo2381 self defense will indeed increase your chances of you being able to limp away after an incident. That said, if you miss the cues that would have prevented the situation all together.

[@dloobo2381]

@@SamBamSalam i consider situational awareness as an equally important cornerstone of self defense as the physical application. The few people that i know, with knowledge of it do it also. It was self-defense against a person that is family or friend, that was to my experience a blindspot for most people that i knew, me included. i have to say that i'm out of the loop for about 6 years but at that time this topic was not often enough pointed out, if ever. maybe women have another view of this topic, but as a man it never crossed my mind.

[@栗栖が萌じゃない]

I thought that this will some reaction, but I learned something instead, thanks coach :)

[@Altitudes]

Self-defence concepts/techniques always need to be the kind of thing you're actually capable of using. It's easy to say "Well, if it's me or them" but the truth is it's a lot harder than that. I used to be very much of the opinion that it was all about learning to strike well, but part of what turned me around to grappling and submission based defences is the idea that you're actually in control of the level of damage you inflict and the escalation/de-escalation of the situation (at least to a much greater degree than swinging punches). We think of self-defence too much in that "me or them" mindset when a lot of situations you might need to use what you've learned are going to be the type where you only need or want to restrain someone. Never fall into that trap of thinking it's going to be a crystal clear life or death scenario where your lizard brain kicks in and allows you to do whatever you want. The world is messy and complicated, highly situational, and training needs to reflect that.

[@fasteddie19999]

Steven, you did everything right. Everything.

[@Sovvolf]

Thanks man. Means a lot.

[@fasteddie19999]

@@Sovvolf No problem. A situation like that really sucks, especially if there are children involved. I can't rate it high enough that you solved it wirhout violence. Wish you all the best.

[@perrenchan6600]

Another great take on a serious topic. Context is so important. Context of law, context of situation, etc. For example my Kickboxing coach would always advise us to use an "open hand" guard for the chance that if there is cctv in the area then it becomes clear that you're the victim and your trying to protect your space. If you instantly respond with the English fisty cuffs stance, there is a big chance you could come across as the aggressor.

[@davidhoffman6980]

Good for you Ramsey. You always encourage critical thinking more than most self defense teachers I've seen.

[@toddkimberlin7609]

Idk what it is about this guy for some reason I have a lot of respect for him and the way he explains things just seems like a real genuine dude

[@keithsinkhorn9031]

The most important things to know are when the law in your jurisdiction allows physical force and when the law allows deadly physical force. After that, one should know the difference between what is legal and what is wise. Finally, anybody old enough to walk around at night alone should have a flashlight on his or her person at all times. Flashlights are legal everywhere in the world, and you will never have to worry about hurting someone by shining a light in his eyes.

[@danmclean7375]

i think the real deterrent might be the 3lb handle full of C-batteries on that steel mag-light your carrying... nothing illegal about it UNTIL you swing it.. and you probably won't need to.

[@keithsinkhorn9031]

@@danmclean7375 That was true back in the day, but LED technology has come a long way since 1990. As little as 20 USD can get anybody a pocket sized light with over 500 lumens.

[@spencer1980]

Wonderfully nuanced perspective on self defense. Could not have said it better myself.

[@Emcron]

well, I guess that makes my country's self-defence laws one of the easiest: they don't exist - you fight, you get charged in court, no matter which end you were on =(

[@Wittemn]

What country?

[@Emcron]

@@Wittemn Singapore

[@Wittemn]

@@Emcron That's crazy man, I had heard a lot of good things from there before.

[@Emcron]

@@Wittemn haha well...alot of the good stuff is only skin-deep...

[@Wittemn]

@@Emcron Can definitely understand, although Colombia (my country) is better known for the bad lol

[@benjaminvega7186]

As much as I love boxing and karate, I've only been in one fight in my whole life. And it was my brother who attacked me. He kicked me in the stomach and 3 times in the chin while I got him to the ground and subdued him. Didn't throw a single punch

[@geoffreyfletcher6976]

This is a very good point, as rarely is any self defense situation solely black and white in its morality. Especially in the USA, where in some states, you can legally defend yourself against someone attacking you, and thus avoid criminal charges, but that same person has the right to turn around and file a civil lawsuit against you for any damages you may have caused them while defending yourself against their attack. Doesn't necessarily mean that they will win the lawsuit. But any use of violence to defend yourself, always has an aftermath that has to be dealt with.

[@glennbeard7219]

Such valuable information . I continue to be impressed by your content and also your impromptu unscripted delivery. Very sincere and probably unrecognized

[@rwdchannel2901]

I live in California and worked as a security guard for ten years. The company requires us to take an arrest and control class every six months. The classes teach some Judo and Jujitsu such as foot sweeps and wrist locks so you can handcuff someone. Before any of that is learned they teach the levels of force so you can respond with an appropriate reaction to an attack. You're not going to pepper spray someone for using some profanity at you, but you will if they take a swing at you. In California they have penal code 837 that allows you to make a citizen's arrest. The arrest and control class won't teach you to be great at self defense, but will teach you how to stay out of jail and that's important too.

[@melisslacour15]

Great topic that's not brought up enough. Great video as always!

[@josecuriel1328]

Ty Mr Rumsey for this information, I really appreciate your valuable information

[@cbeaudry4646]

This is a really great topic, and totally overlooked. In addition to being overlooked with martial-arts self-defense, it also negates (kinda) the gun-guy argument against martial arts ("I'd just shoot 'em" and " gun beats Karate, everytime"). This also gives more credibility to the wrestling pin

[@temwananinkana3419]

As always , very wise words for complex life situations

[@johnf7332]

You’re a very wise fighter, Ramsey. I love your insights into self defense (and other topics that you cover)

[@terranentity]

Well done. Spread the word!

[@pedrotenoriomendes]

Ramsey is wise beyond the scope of martial arts. His analysis of the situation proves that. It's like the knowledge of martial arts can unlock paths in your brain that may give you greater understanding of life as a whole.

[@alLEDP]

Ah and you have a point with 'a lot of self defence situations are avoidable because you know each other'. As much as I love combat sports and full contact i find it very important to teach and foster a character who doesn't adhere to violence. And doing that actively and also with kids. Of course full contact sparring and competition will humble a person and most of the combat sport athletes wouldn't foster any aggression because they know it hurts. I just find it amazing that Martial arts which market their things lifestyle teach and praise those values up and down.

[@35november]

Whenever I discuss self defense with people i bring up the law, and how similiar cases have been judged.

[@cesaralvesdemoraes3187]

I also like leg kicks for that kind of situation. It won't be seen as an attempt on someone's life and it hurts just enough to take out their will to fight.

[@mongoslade245]

Self defense classes sound good, but there’s no substitute for training and sparring. This letter demonstrates that.

[@interestingtopics419]

find it very useful and yes its a legal term very well said

[@therottingrat7204]

Havent watched your videos in a bit, but somehow your talking skills got much better and yet your still the same :D

[@makenjikarate]

Thank you, self defense is a legal term yet so many martial artists don't understand that. Its really funny when I see ads for children's classes and they advertise they teach self defense. I'm there wondering, what laws do they teach them 😂😂😂.

[@stevemann6528]

If you are arrested and your not sure what the laws are, don't say anything or no comment, until they release you or your lawyer turns up upto advice you. Many people have been sent down not for what they did but what they said.

[@michaelroach2959]

Someone mentioned Rory Miller's books on the subject; I am going to add Marc MacYoung's work to the list. They both have a lot of work about recognizing why and how violence takes place, how to respond appropriately, and how to use violence if/when it comes down to it.

[@asarishepard8171]

hey Coach Dewey!

[@RamseyDewey]

Hi

[@asarishepard8171]

@@RamseyDewey i love your videos sorry i havne't been commenting lately ^_^ hang in there in china.

[@johnsecheverell7824]

Some other difficulties are in the fact that your opponent probably does not know how to properly fall. Even if they do, it is easy to forget when your drunk. Between that and the hard cement or flooring you have to be careful with the kind of takedowns you do.

[@marcusaaron4135]

Great video this video hit home with me as I have had several close calls with violent relatives and people close to me. I also hope to start mma or kickboxing soon.

[@bntaft5133]

Thank you, Ramsey.

[@mmareviewer.2372]

Those coaches just need more common sense.

[@richfv829]

Best channel and best coach 💪🏽

[@Dr_V]

In most countries using your fighting skills specifically for defending a child is regarded more leniently by the law even if you do end up getting prosecuted, as long as you don't inflict permanent damage to the attacker it's unlikely to be convicted to more than a fine or some community work hours. That said, I commend Steven for his restraint, I don't think I'd be as patient and clear headed in similar circumstances.

[@MartialArtsViking]

every self defense video should incorporate a section about the legal side of self defense, i am trying to do this but it seems to be boring and people just want to see crazy techniques nowadays

[@cwhitetkd]

Finally somebody said it! I've luckily never been attacked, maybe I don't hang around enough bushes in the park. But I've had plenty of larger male friends and family come up at parties etc and bear hug me and say, "Well what are you going to do, where's your self defence,' and yeah what am I going to do? Gouge their eyes out? Break their knee?

[@fireeaglefitnessmartialart935]

I think for most of the United states, at least for wisco where I studied criminal justice in college...10 yrs ago, the law of thumb was basically, necessary force to stop/negate the threat. Mostly all encounters should be non-lethal, and only as much force as need to stop the initial attack and continuous attacks that may follow. A punch, a hip toss, maybe even a choke hold, could be legally justified depending on the situation. As well as the person being attacked whether they believed their life or serious injury was imminent. For example, a simple bar fight with just a couple fists flying doesn't warrant a knife stab or gun shot necessarily. That would be excessive and the ine that used excessive force would be in more trouble. Also depending on if someone pressed charges.

[@jeffreywright2294]

That is very difficult situation very emotional and of course is he said legal and I'll say moral and whatnot that's you know the sticky situation

[@great4061]

Defending ones self is alot about dirty fighting and not fighting at all

[@simonmorris4226]

Simple answer is practice a combat orientated version of aiki Jutsu or aikido. And actually build up to practicing realistic attacks at full speed.

[@vellitical1532]

i was wondering if you could do a video on head movement in the context of MMA? when i box i seem to be able to avoid punches quite well but i keep getting kicked in the head when it comes to MMA and kickboxing

[@Memorixt]

One of the best self defense (theory) videos I’ve ever seen (listen to) on KZbin.👍🏻 With a bit better redaction would be perfect; but the main point, the content was simply excellent and to the point (sic!)!🙏

[@RamseyDewey]

Thanks

[@Nuetral768]

THANK YOU!!!! THIS IS THE REASON TO TAKE SELF DEFENSE CLASSES!!!!!!!! That being said, a favorite middle ground between the two that I like to use is a loose rear naked choke, use the knee to push their hips forward and pull them backwards, once they start to fall walk that same knee forward so it supports their body and keeps them from fully falling... it's a very precariously weak and unbalanced position that is nearly impossible to do anything from... however, after that it's very circumstantial and though a good self defense instructor may be able to help you pre-prepare to make what choices you wanted to under the circumstances the truth is that it is very rare in such a set of circumstances for everything to go just as you would have hoped... You did very good kid. 😊👍

[@jwhippet8313]

Just an overlooked point: there are not only criminal laws but civil laws and they have two separate standards of evidence. You may not be criminally liable but be supremely sue-able.

[@bernieeod57]

I had a wife and stepdaughter who became violent after refusing to to support a 15 year old girl dropping out of school, doing drugs, and bringing home boys to have sex with. This did not come to light until I left active duty. When I tried to stop it, she and her mother became violent. I just stood there and took the blows exclaiming "Is that the best your drug addicted MTV watching body can do? I did end up with a fat lip, nose bleed, and a few bruises. Had their blows become mite effective, I would have started blocking and if necessary, strike if necessary to open up an escape route. It was not until after things calmed down and we tried to have a rational discussion where they explained how I deserved the violence, depriving a 15 year old girl her drugs and sex life was child abuse, and failing to reel from blows I deserved was domestic abuse I packed up my things? Left, and never returned

[@yuriysemenikhin302]

This is EXACTLY the kind of situation that Aikido had been developed for

[@solutionsforabrightfuture3579]

No way would I ever trust aikido. Throw a cup of lemonade or a hundred dollars in ones then get those kids out of thier before that aikido stuff.

[@yuriysemenikhin302]

@@solutionsforabrightfuture3579 Throwing lemonade in someone's face to distract them, while taking up a superior positing for a grapling take down, is a 100% legitimate Aikido move :-) And very much like guys from Graciebreakdown in their "Should "Chokeholds" be Banned in Law Enforcement?" video, Aikido is against choking people.

[@Aegis---]

Depends i suppose, none of the bs traditional "ki" moves it has would ever be useful, which is why I prefer tomiki aikido, much better imo

[@goosebiden6937]

Good video but brand jumper are you wearing? it looks good

[@RamseyDewey]

That’s a hoodie from the Dragon Fighting Championships, it’s a Chinese MMA show that I do reffing and judging for from time to time.

[@egontokessy1610]

Hope you have a podcast, I like listening to you :).

[@RamseyDewey]

Yep. I do.

[@egontokessy1610]

@@RamseyDewey started following on Spotify.

[@simoneriksson8329]

Yes advice like "gauge his eyes out", strike him in the throat" or "attack his groin - grab, twist and pull" might sound smart in theory but chances are that if your not somekind of sociopath you won't be able to bring yourself to do that to another person, even less if its a person you know an care about. Because of this aswell as the difficulty of training such tecniques aswell as the legal and social reprecausions you discuss in the video I feel like "superdeadly" tecniques and even striking in a lot of cases are pretty useless for selfdefencetraining. I think that standing grappling (hand and gripfighting, clinching, takedowns and takedowndefence etc...) is a better focus because that are things you are more likely to actually do. Ramsey I know you don't really like to talk about selfdefence but I think it would be really intresting if you did a video exploring different ways to control a violent person without hurting them (asuming you are bigger and stronger than they are and know atleast abit about fighting).

[@AirQuotes]

Once again giving great advice

[@SkarrGaming]

Aren't family Christmas parties great!

[@shattereddnb3268]

Here in sweden choking someone out is considered attemptive murder and getting away with self defence at all is very very hard if you are a non-elderly man

[@stevendrew5360]

Awesome video!

[@jatsantsa]

My jiu jitsu master used to teach us. You should protect your self and people around you and also you should protect the atacker. Only problem is for that you need to outclass your opponent.

[@daniel-zh9nj6yn6y]

There's a video of a drunk guy being kept under control by a BJJ coach, without using chokes. The drunk was outside the gym, he wanted to challenge the coach. I think there's a Gracie Breakdown of that event.

[@c99kfm]

In Swedish, we have two concepts: Självförsvar - "self defense", literally. Training, equipment or actions intended to increase your safety. Nödvärn - "emergency warding", sort of literally. Violence against another person in defense of yourself or another person. The latter is the concept discussed in legislation and is coupled with the concept of "nödvärnsexcess", or "excessive emergency warding", which is when you went too far EVEN THOUGH a lower level of violence would have been acceptable in the circumstances. These two concepts are merged into one term in English, which is something I think confuses the matter to non-lawyers.

[@abujasm2223]

Great video as usual Mr. Dewey, but can't choking someone unconscious, with a rear naked choke, lead sometimes to permenant physical damage? Or perhaps the information i read on the internet is faulty?

[@ddg-fi5bp]

If rnc is not an option, mount and wrist control is also a good way to stop a single guy.

[@CaptPostmod]

The kind of self-defense situations most martial arts academies encourage their students to fantasize about feel analogous to training for car wrecks to me. Like you're driving your car. Suddenly, through no fault of your own, there's another car in front of you without warning. There's really NOTHING you can do to not hit the other car at that point. Actual self-defense would have been preventative-knowing dangerous intersections, being aware of your surroundings, making sure to observe suspiciously moving vehicles, etc. No amount of knowing how to roll with the punch or special kung fu is going to save you from getting wrecked by the point the obstacle has already popped out at you. The same is true of random thugs ninja jumping out from the bushes on your evening walk.