What You’re Getting Wrong About Vegans (feat. Emmy Blotnick & Matteo Lane) - You Up w/ Nikki Glaser

[@ComedyCentral]

Nikki, Emmy and Matteo share their dating revelations: 0:11 Nikki talks about how her views on vegans have changed since she became one herself: 2:24 In “Dear You Up,” Nikki considers which factors make someone a good partner: 9:59 Off Air, Andrew Collin and Nikki find themselves at odds over someone she’s been messaging on a dating app: 18:14

[@jasoncarrick5461]

Nikki is trying to hard, plus her feet are jacked.

[@tempsitch5632]

Great input Matteo. Way to jump in with those golden nuggets.

[@BuzzLiteBeer]

This just confirms all the toxic pick-up advice men get. If you want to get laid by younger women, you have to be distant, you have to play games, and you have to be selfish. Maturity and compassion are for older women; younger women are attracted to men they have to chase and who make them feel insecure. Nikki sin't wrong that finding the right person is largely luck and time spent, but her standards are unfortunately too high. I do feel bad for her in the sense that she will never meet this unicorn of a man (tall, handsome, successful, compassionate, and most importantly, into her and not someone younger and more attractive). Leagues do exist and she's only into guys out of her league. She's prioritizing external metrics and has debilitating perfectionism when it comes to picking a guy.

[@leebishop7591]

I feel like she has so many potential suitors that she keeps pushing guys away bc she wants this pegasus unicorn to fly down and wisk her away. Each guy is cool in there own right but she keeps holdin out for the ONE and its easy to play around and not take these guys seriously bc they dont meet her list. I grew out of this at 30/31.

[@mushroom6707]

Dam u wrote a whole thesis on her love life

[@lindaclark5911]

Sounds like she wouldnt go out with you? Settling doesnt work. Id rather be single for life than settle for an egomaniacal mr right now. I hope she finds her soul mate. 😍😍

[@alenajackson8386]

Lee Dragon I don’t think she meant that she wanted it on purpose, it starts out by her friend explaining that you have to find a breaking point to stop putting up with that behavior.

[@BuzzLiteBeer]

@@lindaclark5911 There's a difference between being immature/expecting perfection and settling. Settling is being with someone out of fear of being alone; no one should ever feel like this. Being able to love people for their imperfections and choosing a few traits that align with your core values while letting go of the shallow shit is not settling.

[@uwaisis]

Please upload longer videos so Off Air w/ Andrew Collin can be a 20 minute segment

[@tbituner]

The Andrew part is the best part.

[@Paul-yj4ml]

@@tbituner yeah the only reason why I watch this thing

[@nocturnalferalguitarist]

Amen, I agree 💯% if it could be 200% , it would be, I love Off Air

[@guyplacencio9454]

Why does blotnick sound like she's crying the whole time

[@flyingman09101984]

I guess the side-cam doesn't help our brain understand what's happening when she's talking... Idk...

[@z-rossi3672]

Im not a psychologist, but it sounds like she's setting impossible ever changing standards as a barrier from meaningful relationships. Probably because she's scared it wont be that movie stereotypical 'the one.'

[@nealduran3013]

Found my girl friend, on badoo. 3.9 years later still kicking it. And a long distance relationship as I am a truck driver. Would not change it for the world. Also she has three kids. Sometimes you got to go with the flow.

[@Remi-bt7tp]

Nikki you have to be open to dating civilians, and not just the comedian/celebrities you have stated that are the only ones you can really date. The pool is so much bigger and thus your lottery chances go way up. Good Luck !!

[@susanv1596]

Remi 118 True. She should avoid comedians- most of the ones she has interviewed talk as if they are so great, when they are average or less; just because drunk women at their shows come on to them.

[@bryanw4637]

13:53. “I work hard on my physical appearance, and I want to share it with someone.” There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be with someone that shares the same standards as you. Couples, or at least the best ones, compliment each other and make each other better. If you “settle” that’s not going to happen and there will just be issues down the road. Your standards shows intelligence, foresight, and strength, and when you find the right guy you won’t have to keep justifying yourself in the relationship. You’ll be truly happy.

[@CrazedTacoEater852]

I thought my husband was very cheezy and corny with his love but i didnt push him away, i kind of fell in love with how tender and sweet he was even though i wasnt good at doing the same thing.

[@brianburkart]

One of my favorite podcasts/KZbin channels. Thank you Nikki! You're a national treasure.

[@rebeccasalter2425]

I was over 50 before I was able to feel attracted to someone who was nice to me. So glad that won’t happen to you, because you are working it out now.

[@number1sun]

So Nikki wants a handsome tall rich successful guy with status and a rockin bod who is perfectly compatable with her? She's going to be single forever! lol

[@-themercyseat]

Not to mention she doesnt look that great in this video imo

[@rebekahmullins5703]

Not to mention someone who’s not too close or too distant and has a foot long dong, that can be her shoulder while not being clingy and can meet every single one of her endless needs. She’s not unrealistic at all or narcissistic.😂

[@suzannewilcox9329]

@@-themercyseat you are an idiot.

[@johnrobbins2932]

@@rebekahmullins5703 She's setting up her own failure. Her shopping list is a mile long. Lol

[@harryheart6018]

It's not unachievable. She'd need tits tho.

[@TJForystek]

I can empathize with your experience in relationships. This episode spoke to me a little. Timing is everything! Great Stuff.

[@devanshbisla9311]

20:37 "A puss" hahaha best joke of the episode

[@singingsunflower9000]

Matteo is so nice I would love to have a friend like him. It is so refreshing to see men that put care into their appearence.

[@morecowbell235]

sarcasm? He looks like he woke up and stumbled to the studio

[@brandir432]

Andrew and Nikki at the end was the best fucking part XD

[@robert-maxbob]

Very insightful episode. The Andrew segments are a plus, keep them.

[@sailaway258]

Nikki the fact that youre famous young and still looking means youre trying so dont give up.

[@charlesbukowski6455]

She needs to speak for herself before stating why people become comedians. Nikki glazer comes off as sort of sad and narcissistic, she needs to humble herself and stop worrying about a guy for her happiness or contentment before her own self. Otherwise she’ll continue to be a broken record. With a personality like that she deserves exactly what type of guy she’s constantly pursuing. I know it’s not the nicest thing to say but none the less

[@chubbybehem0th]

Her expectations are so unrealistic, and she has many flaws that she considers a virtue. I can think of a million reasons why she's single.

[@patrickjames268]

Wow. Incel’s seem to be getting more & more empathetic.

[@kimmyball4961]

I'm sure the same can be said about most people.......

[@harryheart6018]

Reason 1.000.001: no tits

[@DirtyFrigginHarry]

Andrew: What are you doing! NIkki: Um...I don't know alright let the thumbs ups roll in

[@the.noooooticer]

she's a babe, and funny, but it's pretty clear her being single is her own fault

[@belforio]

more Andrew and Nikki

[@luvyou-baby]

I feel bad for her and understand how she feels. It also reminds me of ted mossy from how I met your mother, and how he felt this way as well

[@salemi7438]

I'm so glad I have found someone else who recognizes that olive garden carbonara is an affront to carbonara

[@stevenl6283]

Carbonara is the most underrated pasta

[@AB-nb2ic]

Omfg, Bacon Is NOT Pancetta !!!

[@richardnokes6438]

The Goodwill comment slayed me! 😂

[@SsooFfetch]

I just came to a looped version of Nikki saying "peripatetic". You up? Hell yeah.

[@Hellowhatup98]

I love Emmy and Andrew they are so cute and funny

[@scottreutter]

Love her!

[@Szaam]

"Do you think I turned gay yesterday?!"

[@alexdewayne9392]

Hitting that wall sucks dont it

[@slickoboy04]

I'm here because I just discovered Matteo and I'm thirsty for his co--his comedy! 😏Too bad he couldn't get a word in. Btw, I love how Nikki made a career telling stereotypical jokes, such as about vegans; and now that she is a vegan, she is "better than that" and feels entitled to criticize other comedians and explain to them what is actually funny... Such a vegan-approach to comedy. #LGBTQ

[@kerflop]

Maybe ur obsessing about relationships and thats keeping you from just letting go. Its also not luck, its openness and work. Good relationships happen when youre feeling free and not overanalytical.

[@FrozenFrames]

Yes nikki, i do live in India

[@brianburkart]

Also.... Nikki: I'm a professionally trained chef, I have no ego and a wicked since of humor. 6ft tall... svelte. I'm right here.

[@KUCHYRock]

I saw her on Conan and couldn’t believe how she was single. I just watched this and totally understand now 😂

[@jenl5992]

Nikki, don't assume that your sex drive is going to decrease as you age.

[@SeeStuDo]

Emmy is a straight dream girl. Matteo ain't so bad either.

[@sushantgambhir]

Your soulmate is definitely in India. Its me.

[@harmony202]

Go get our bhabi 😂 ;)

[@rebekahmullins5703]

There’s someone out there that couldn’t meet your needs? Shocker🤔 😂

[@iloveyou231165]

Imagine that, once you become a vegan you automatically assume the moral high ground and say you can't make fun of my choices 😄😄😄 now that's a fucking joke.

[@tropicaljustin7450]

Looking to see an update on how things went with the guy from the app

[@rs2705]

I miss this show

[@gurugee2112]

Nikki met her "soul mate" at 18 by discovering comedy stand up. Everything since then is really in support of that.

[@txgt4463]

Is this TMZ twice

[@ryanallen863]

2:36 Are you talking about Joe Rogan? That bit was hysterical. #vegancats

[@txgt4463]

Is called growing up to find the right man

[@ashwoodward3630]

Parapetetic: Traveling place to place.. Good word.

[@jamisonmunn9215]

Its never the right time and its never the right person, some people are just willing to make things work.

[@zigfreidbop]

Maybe the problem is the elitist dating app. Who advertises themselves on such an app without being a narcissist?

[@MadvillainMonarch]

Was kinda into this until she started complaining about wanting a man with "status". I think that mentality is pretty damaging. How many people are able to achieve said status? It sucks for her for sabotaging herself from potentially being in a great relationship and perpetuates a shitty standard that we place too much value on in society.

[@nathanlayman]

Nikki does tend to act like women are the only ones being drained from unhealthy relationships because they are the givers etc. There are plenty of men who are the givers in all of their relationships and feel taken advantage of a lot. I would love for her to talk to some men about their side of relationships it feels like typically it's only when women are on her show that she talks to them about those issues.

[@tomineumann5073]

Totally hear u LOUD AND CLEAR!! Hang in there!!! Me 2.. it’s wicked but ya can’t quit..

[@clermeil]

(How do you find one type of guy attractive all your life, but end up with another?) 1:02 "You have to hit a breaking point of dirt-baggery..." Or in other words: One has to settle for men that are not as attractive so that they will stay in a relationship.

[@txgt4463]

A responsible man

[@badandyg]

Its gotta be because of the pool of dudes in California.

[@rodney1818]

Thank you for reminding me how Petty and in mature women are at your age Nikki

[@sabbathjackal]

In mature ??

[@kimmyball4961]

Good grief, you can't just lump everyone together.

[@sabbathjackal]

@@kimmyball4961 yes we can. How else are we to create stereotypes?

[@meganconner5539]

How humbly illiterate you are.

[@Jaybles2113]

If you’re gonna attack someone to make yourself feel a little bit better, maybe try to avoid making yourself look like an illiterate hillbilly. It’s “immature”, for the sake of your future efforts at condescension.

[@user-wg7nw3mh2e]

Wow. Ice cold. Also, Nikki isn't like... particularly successful. I mean like there are plenty of 35 year olds who make a lot more money than she does...

[@stevenl6283]

She's more successful than you, has comedy specials on Netflix, has had a tv show, and is a millionaire. She's literally in the top 1% of income earners so what are you talking about.

[@DoctorHemi]

As long as she keeps working out, Nikki will still be hot well into her 50's and beyond. My ex (who, incidentally, reminds me a !ot of Nikki) is 52 and she's still smokin' hot (because she's worked out regularly since her teens) and that's after having our two kids.

[@kimmyball4961]

Must know if there was a date with Jason!!!!!!! Please.......😂🤣😉

[@azeemahnakhoda1869]

yes i must know this information... like i know shes on like episode 65 or something right now...and this is episode 9 so i am assuming it didnt work out or we would have heard about it... but i would like to know if she ever went out and basically the rest of the conversation

[@kimmyball4961]

@@azeemahnakhoda1869 I wonder how we could find this out!! Just tragic to leave us hanging like that!! Lol 🤣

[@mortishanocturnal71]

I c a future with nikki and andrew♡

[@damienlery7550]

So did you get that guy ???

[@rodney1818]

They make books designed to increase your vocabulary

[@jonwhitehead5426]

Why doesn't she hook up with her friend in the end?

[@JustinGauvin]

“Comedy” Central

[@azeemahnakhoda1869]

i need to know if it worked out between nikki and jason. i will pay money for this information... @nikkiglasser

[@breitbandig]

why the long face nikki?

[@Fanaz10]

genetics

[@kennyt0342]

I shared it with the make a wish foundation

[@jamisonmunn9215]

It's not luck, 50 years ago the average married couple lived less than 10 miles apart. Were those people some how soulmates, no? People went on a few dates and decided they probably wont be murdered by this person.

[@onthemarksales]

If Nikki wrote me I would literally juice

[@DirtyFrigginHarry]

Oh god based on what Matteo and Emmy said here I think I might be a comic

[@ryane1383]

There's actually decent advice about eating healthy in here

[@Duderonamus]

peripatetic... good vocabulary word

[@grizla1895]

first time watching. laughed my ass off.

[@1StepForwardToday]

Nikki should end each video with a few words with only her in the shot, n then back up to wide shot with Nikki and Matteo, where he says something ridiculous.

[@dugfriendly]

glad that female comics aren't a representative of the general population

[@TheBobcatvictim]

Always be yourself Ian

[@BooBuKittyPhuk]

They always say "comics", but it's really just 'humans'.

[@tylermcrae1598]

Fuck all the negative comments she’s an attractive woman with her own problems like anyone else. But god damnit she better at least give that bumble guy a chance to get drinks lmao

[@krcjayhawks]

It's luck, for sure. I feel like I usually end up in relationships when I'm least focused on it...and I hear a lot of people say that. And no - get that status dude. Nothing wrong with high standards. I bet Bumble and Tinder would be a nightmare for you lol

[@nklauskirk06]

Nikki, I understand that you have your standards but I feel that you are limiting yourself with your shallow tendencies. Be a little more open minded. People might surprise you. Good luck, I hope you find your person.

[@rolanddes]

Least attractive narative in woman to me: I had to date the dirtbags and get it out of my system before I could appriciate a good man. **I am out of here the moment I feel this. **

[@stevenl6283]

Get over yourself lol

[@rolanddes]

​@@stevenl6283 This is the single greatest comeback anyone can think of. "Get over yourself" O.K.

[@ferna2294]

26 and you are grossed about love? Too young? LMAO. That´s not normal. This is the type of lady that ends up beaten up by some idiot. She didn´t deserve such a good fella.

[@tanrredwards8739]

Took ever bit of Nikki to not say Fame!🤣

[@AMPProf]

I'm cofused.. what is this

[@BigMike00]

Nikki I feel the same way, all work no play makes Nikki a dull girl

[@rustknuckleirongut8107]

What a shitshow of broken people. I feel sad for anyone that has the misfortune of catching feelings for these monsters.

[@nikolalutov8898]

People with that attitude either die alone or, eventually, settle for someone way worse than their ex! Deservedly so... :D

[@johannes7654]

I'm german and confused

[@dugfriendly]

when she desires intimacy and stops fetishizing sex, she will be happy

[@emmanuelruiz1000]

this has got to be the saddest episode I seen of this , like comedians can't accept love when it comes their way jeez , so it's the take way don't date comedians man this is ding sad

[@joeshanahan2919]

Her definition of “emotional labor” is not correct at all.

[@harryheart6018]

That shirt. Flat, yes. Flattering, no.

[@dtrsounds]

There is no such thing as a soul mate. It’s a myth

[@Videoorbiter]

Ill be glad when we get through the giving boring millennials jobs era of entertainment.

[@rodney1818]

Yeah and try having a vocabulary instead of saying like so much

[@mushroom6707]

I can eat a whole bathtub of zoodles dont come for the zoods

[@michaelhart7282]

I wanted to hear about the Mariah stuff #lgbtlamb

[@peted8750]

Great podcast, but get someone besides Matteo. He's alright, but we need a better push back & forth from a male POV.

[@deiselnoe1]

Am I watching the view?