Stupid things People ACTUALLY Say about my DISABILITY!🙊 | THINGS NOT TO SAY TO SOMEONE IN ♿️

[@keelie300]

My favourite is “oh you don’t need all that medication, you just need to eat right/exercise more/do yoga/go vegan/etc.” Gee thanks, good to know that you know better than someone with a medical degree /s.

[@Wheelsnoheels]

Ugh I bet that is tiring. :(

[@spiceyourspace]

When you get told all of the new fangled miracle working products you should've already been using

[@mzkayza8595]

Well in some ways and for some people nutrition and movement can do wonders. I know. IN the past year I have changed so much in my health from doing just that. Each person needs to be their own DR first. Also they may just have had the same experience I am having and want to help.

[@AutieDino]

'go vegan' grrr oh they can get in the bin, Scott Pilgrim wasn't a documentary, there are no 'Vegan Powers' >_

[@_top_cat]

Mel BunBun I had someone say “try juice plus! It’s amazing and can cure EDS!” 😳 First of all, I find it incredible that top scientists across the world haven’t found a cure yet juice plus will cure me. Secondly, no amount of juice will change my genetics and thirdly, stop trying to sell me your shit and kindly shove your juice plus up your arse 🙄🤦🏼‍♀️

[@VampFaye]

When people tell me "You don't look disabled," I reply with "You don't look stupid, but I won't hold that against you." I've also had people yelp about handicapped parking. One elderly guy yelled at me for taking his "old person space." I replied with "You don't know what's wrong with me and I don't know what's wrong with you. Are you a gambling man? Wanna trade?" He apologized, threw his car in gear and sped off. I guess that means no?

[@ThereIsAlwaysaWay2]

Wow! Nice one. :)

[@tntgamerdotnl]

Thats an epic response! Will keep that one in mind 😂

[@sketch__5972]

Those are amazing responses! xD

[@BlakeGeometrio]

Nice. Mind if I use those comebacks next time?

[@darcydoll437]

Wow, I love your reply. Like others have asked would you mind if I borrow that should the need arise? I get the "looks" more often then anything though thankfully less now living in a smaller town. I am relatively young (in my 40's) and am currently not needing to use a cane or a walker so I must not be disabled right?!? Ugh. Some folks it is their "right" to police others disabilities. Like why don't you go about your day, and leave others alone...no really.

[@Avabliss]

I can't imagine hearing crap like this all the time. I was in a chair for a brief period while recovering from a spine injury and was shocked at the things people did and/or said. I remember being in Ikea with my family and a man walked up and pushed me out of the way (and away from my child) so he could walk past....like I was a lone shopping cart and not a person. Or when I got up to use the bathroom (I could stand and walk with great difficulty and pain) a woman told me it was selfish of me to use a chair when people have "real disabilities"....I was so humiliated. Good for you for standing up for yourself and others!

[@Wheelsnoheels]

wow those stories are terrible. You poor thing. Thanks for sharing. xx

[@OldSport1987]

Amanda B are you kidding me? Thats so disrespectful! What an ahole! 😲😡😠 I can't believe someone would say or do that to you I'm sorry.

[@DrunkChristmasSkunk]

Oh I have been pushed away too. It's humiliating.

[@SandraFrancisca]

(Last christmas i walked out of my wheelchair, in church, because i can walk a littlebit, and i saw everyone was looking very strange at me..... so i shouted "its a miracle" just to shock everyone a littlebit. That felt amazing.

[@Wheelsnoheels]

hahahah. ;)

[@TDSSterkenburg]

Yes! Queen!

[@addisonwolsiffer9952]

SandraFrancisca And I hope that someday you'll get your wish. Hope you get better❤️❤️❤️

[@SandraFrancisca]

Otter Lynn i don't need to. I'm happy the way i am. My legs will never be stronger and that's fine. I don't need to change

[@SandraFrancisca]

Otter Lynn i can't get better. But why would i need to? It's not that i don't like my life because of my disability. It's how the world reacts to me that makes things difficult

[@EmilyCheetham]

The most stupid thing someone said to me that actually left me crying is a work coach (from ingeus) telling me that because they had overcome their problems and was now able to travel on their own to a place they had never been before for a job interview that I was perfectly capable of doing so. It literally made me cry that she wouldn’t listen to me and I was told not to cry when I was crying. They wouldn’t listen and they wouldn’t give me an alternative or assistance. Eventually they gave in and didn’t force me to go to this place. I was sooooo angry with that person. Good for you if you over come your problems but that doesn’t mean everyone can.

[@schnauzermom6352]

What chaps my butt is when people ask me why I'm in a walker. One guy actually told me to get out of it (I was seated on it) because his 90 y/o grandmother didn't use one so I shouldn't either. My medical history is not up for conversation unless I bring it up.

[@Wheelsnoheels]

defo!!!! I get that sometimes!!! And "what chaps my butt" made me lol :)

[@annettevillain4352]

I think that must be a common experience. I've had that same remark made to me

[@shodellafriends6772]

What chaps my butt .... love it ... lol

[@Jaimi_Crystal]

I'm in a wheelchair also, and if I'm out & about with someone else in a chair, people tend to say "you should race each other" or "Can you do a wheelie?", "it must be so fun to be in a chair". I've had people ask me if i sleep in my chair or a bed, how do i shower/get dressed and I've also had people talk to me like I'm deaf and stupid and/or can't see them very well - they speak VERY loudly, slowly and an inch away from my face.

[@Wheelsnoheels]

yes I can relate to that ;)

[@atonyathehun6639]

One good thing about a wheelchair is … just slowly roll away😂

[@EmilySuydam]

I was born with spina bifida. While at work I was told by a customer that I relied on my wheelchair too much because I was "giving up" and that I shouldn't have taken no for an answer when doctors told me (when I was a toddler) that there was nothing more they could do for me surgical wise. She told me about how she broke her leg once and needed a wheelchair, but she got better because she "refused to give up". That's the day I realized I had perfected my fake politeness with customers.

[@sprouting_lady]

At least she wasn't your PT. I've been told that I need to avoid using my cane by my PT because "you're far too young to be dependent on that." I have fucking EDS/JHS, it's not gonna just disappear from my genetic code with some if I do some exercises; and I definitely would rather be reliant on a cane than walk around in excruciating pain. I tried following her advice once through a very painful walk, and "ignore the pain" became the primary thing I remember from it and I overslept my nap by 2 hours afterwards due to exhaustion. Fuck that shit.

[@EmilySuydam]

Ugh! Why would someone go into the medical field, especially physical therapy, if they are going to remain that ignorant about physical disabilities? Hopefully she doesn't do any more harm to others.

[@rosastrohhut]

EmilyS My surgeon forgot what state I was in constantly and could not remember he told me to put no weight on my hip whatsoever 4 weeks ago and got upset because I was coming the way from the carpark to the office in a wheelchair. He was a good butcher, but nothing more. So just because someone is in the medical field does not make him more empathetic or understanding or even organized. :(

[@useAnEllipse]

Ugh! I hate when abled people are like that, they spend like a month or two needing mobility assistance and think they know everything about being disabled.

[@kloklowhat]

I have spina bifda too. I was after having a massive operation and was needing my wheelchair more than ever. I usually could walk small distances. But anyway I was going to my local shop and was buying sweets with my cousin and the cashier said "You shouldn't give up walking, you should have walked here. Someone I know has ___ (insert completely different condition here) and they walk all the time! So you can too! Don't be lazy!" I was so offended I know they ment well but I got extreme awful pains in my legs and she knew I had a massive operation too!

[@kreepyskera]

I get pushed around in a wheelchair do to fatigue (I’m a teenager) and the look on small children’s faces is priceless! They are utterly amazed that someone other than an elderly person is in a wheelchair. My guess is they’re thinking “it’s a big kid in a stroller” haha. Much love❤️

[@Wheelsnoheels]

awww yeah. I get that too. Probably down to media miss representation. When ever we see ad's for mobility aids, its always the elderly advertising the product. :S

[@babypoof]

sera whitt that reminds a lot of times when i go out with my friend (she has a brace) small children just look at her leg trying to figure out what it is. Some people think she cant even wall without it

[@pytho8976]

Ahaha I totally wish we could still use strollers as teens!! All the gadgets

[@TheMazinoz]

@@babypoof Yeah, I wear them to support my crappy EDS joints. I wear them under clothes if practicable.

[@mywanderingwheels]

I think most stroller age kids more think of it as an adult in a stroller and are wowed.

[@stretchkitty21]

I get a lot of comparisons with other people with disabilities. They assume "if so and so can do this you should be able to too." Also "you're too young to need that / to be disabled (in a questioning way not even a sympathetic way , though neither is good)." Lol I kindof agree with them but unfortunately my body does not. Lastly, as a part time wheelchair user THANK YOU for reporting that officer (officer right?... one who said "it's a miracle")!

[@Wheelsnoheels]

yes a CUSTOMS OFFICER!!! at gatwick air port!! In the DISABILITY LINE! Where you would think they would have had training. shocking. :( I made a video on what it feels like to be paralysed, and said that even if i was to meet someone with the same level injury as me (T10) our "symptoms" would be completely different. A spinal cord injury is as unique as a finger print. And thinking about what you said, so are disabilities. xx

[@zoewashburn4678]

Omg yes the "well this person has the the same condition as you and they can do this why can't you". I remember one time when I misdiagnosed with asthma and I had to sit out of PE. Some kid came up to me and said "you know Kate has asthma and she still does PE you should just suck it up like her" it took every ounce of strength I had not to start screaming at her.

[@augustpritchett4521]

When I was a kid, about 8 or so, I was in my push chair/stroller contraption thing and was in line at an ice cream place with my 2 aunts while vacationing in Florida. They were talking with another woman who was asking questions about my disability and she asked them, "How's her mind?" They told her that I was highest in my class, but still. How on earth would anyone think it's ok to ask whether someone is mentally disabled just because he/she is physically disabled? Another one from my childhood that still irks me sometimes is when my aunt and I overheard a girl ask her grandmother why I was in a wheelchair and they weren't. Her response? "Because we're blessed." Really????

[@Wheelsnoheels]

Oh my goodness!!! People hey!!!?? Thank you for your comment. :)

[@sketch__5972]

That really made me gasp. smh

[@TheMazinoz]

I've actually had a NURSE ask me if I was "special" as in intellectually impaired because I had at that time an "invisible" disability. I'd just finished trying to explain Ehlers Danlos to her. There is no intellectual impairment with it.

[@shraddhakulkarni7109]

Exactly! Couldn't agree more

[@Erin_Coke]

"If I shot you in the foot, would you be able to feel it?" Someone asked me this when I was 9-years-old. NINE! "Wow, you struggled so much getting into the elevator. Your life must be terrible." Someone said this to me just a few weeks ago. "I broke my foot last year and had to use crutches. I know exactly what you're going through." "Can she walk AT ALL?" A guy at an amusement park in America tried his hardest to not give me a discount about 10 years ago. He must have asked my dad this 5 times. Waiter at restaurant: "What does she want to eat?" My mom: " I don't know, why don't you ask her?" This happened to me for YEARS.

[@Wheelsnoheels]

awww yep i think i have had nearly all of these too.

[@erin4930]

I was at a local movie theatre and the person you buy the tickets from was not familiar on how to discount me...instead of asking another employee on the matter they asked me if I was able to use their washroom. If I answered right I guess I would be considered disabled enough for the discount. They were dealt with and I got free tickets. Its never happened since then.

[@AutieDino]

Jesus! :(

[@tinnybird1971]

@@AutieDino Good Lord!

[@atonyathehun6639]

Or when you give cashier your money & they hand it iced your shoulder to the able bodied person who’s I’m shopping with. Which is why I prefer to shop alone🤷🏻‍♀️

[@SubbyStar]

I hear “watch out for the lady” sooooo many times when I’m out in public. I’m not going to suddenly go beserk and try to take out people like they’re on my own personal bowling alley!

[@harrietbrown6415]

Well, since people give you the opportunity, you know? I'd love to know what happens.

[@fintasticfinley232]

A lot of things people say to me are things like "you can't have anxiety, you talk to people to much!" Or "anxiety is fake, people just use it to try and be cute" but one of the things that really gets to me is when they just tell me to cheer up and get out of the house more when they learn about my depression.

[@Wheelsnoheels]

awwww. Mental health is so hard for people to understand. I feel like i need to make a video on "invisible" "disabilities or mental issues. XXX

[@babypoof]

lieutenant Marshmallow yeah stuff like that just gives me more anxiety. Its just hard for those that dont deal with to understand.

[@virgil.6539]

Gosh, I hate people like that? My own mother can't figure out that I have depression because I'm not sad 24/7, which is disappointing because she herself is a doctor.

[@taradaves3096]

i took care of my disabled mother and, after she passed, I registered her car in my name and traded in her "disabled" license plates. The woman at the counter shamed me for "taking" disabled plates when I clearly wasn't disabled. The irony being, I am disabled, but not in such a mobility-limiting way. I should have told her not to disrespect my dead mother.

[@Wheelsnoheels]

ugh that is so bad. :(

[@KiKiQuiQuiKiKi]

One must brace oneself when dealing with the DMV (Department of Motor Vehicles, in the USA)!

[@morganmcclure5001]

I don't have a physical disability, I'm autistic and recently I was told by a psychiatrist who I won't be seeing again 'you're very well spoken for someone with autism.' The worst one, however, has to go to 'I can't be around you if you're not medicated,' that boils my blood

[@ashbygail]

My mum's disabled and uses crutches to walk around. Her biggest issue is when people are overly sympathetic towards her. People she doesn't even know come up to her and tell her she's doing brilliantly for having left the house or for 'trying' as if being a disabled person automatically makes you an invalid. They also turn to me and tell I should be proud to have such an inspirational mum. People mean well but I can see how much this knocks her confidence. I just wish people were a little more aware of how what they say can affect people.

[@Wheelsnoheels]

yes for sure. :)

[@erin4930]

if only people would think before they speak life would be easier!

[@margalothegreat_hams]

Yeah I hate how people are always like "You're so brave for coming out of the house!" They wouldn't say that to a person who didn't have a disability. It's like, they're just living their life people!

[@atonyathehun6639]

God that pisses me off when folks do that to me! I get really mad when I’m shopping & price comparing & folks always asking if I need help!! I lost a leg not my mind🤦🏻‍♀️

[@mywanderingwheels]

Yeah that praise for existing with a disability thing is really weird.

[@yourlovelynightmare1]

I remember going to the grocery store with my fiance and I saw a woman in a wheelchair. Of course I stared for a second out of instinct then felt terribly rude so I walked over and told her how gorgeous her hair was. We sat and chatted about makeup and hair routines and a bit about family, then when I left and found my fiance his first question was "so what happened?" I didn't understand what he meant apparently because "oh we talked about hair and how I've always struggled with acne" wasn't the reply he was after. XD he says "no, why is she in the wheelchair?" I literally just smiled, shrugged, and said "oh, I dunno." as he looked at me, DUMBFOUNDED that I could have a conversation with her without asking! XD if she wanted to divulge, she would have. If not, that's fine. I hate when I have a nice conversation with people and then they just hardcore stare at my lip and ask "so what's that on your lip?" I have a scar. A very noticeable scar from a skin graph. But I was hoping you came over to actually chat, not ask about my scar. X.X haha

[@Wheelsnoheels]

awww thats such a lovely story thank you for sharing. :)

[@margalothegreat_hams]

Yeah it's so annoying it'd be like if people were constantly coming over to you and asking "so why do you have brown hair". It's like that's just the way they are people! It's not a big deal, they're just a normal person living their life.

[@CameraShySmash]

I am not disabled but I do have an interest in your sort of content. I also follow chronically jaquie and some other people with disabilities and illnesses. I don’t want to say I find it interesting, but I do like hearing the stories. I would, however, never confront somebody and ask them why they are in the wheelchair or whatever it may be. I feel since I have started watching these sort of videos I have become even more alert and compassionate and if it looks like somebody needs help (example: today a customer dropped his card) I make sure it is okay before I assist because I understand many people are completely capable of handling many things. I enjoy the conversations that you can have with a person once you’ve gotten to know them about their struggles and accomplishments. I want to be a nurse someday, and learning about different people with different abilities to myself makes me want to be a better person. Long story short, I really appreciate your content and feel that you’re doing a great thing by sharing your story and experiences ❤️

[@Wheelsnoheels]

Thank you so much. My aim so to raise awareness for all, so its wonderful to hear that you find it useful. Im sure you will make and awesome nurse, and what better way to gain a bit of understanding and compassion that to watch videos like ours. I have unfortunately had may encounters with horrible healthcare professionals, and i wonder why they choose it as a job!!! Good luck. xxx

[@babypoof]

CameraShySmash im kind of the same regarding awareness. My friend is disabled physically and because of that she grew up around those with mental disabilities. I have come to realize how unfair people are towards those that are different. I try to stand up for those that cant stand up for themselves. It sucks tho, cuz no matter how many times they get in trouble for mistreatment, they just revert back to what they originally thought. Its hard to make a change, but hopefully there are enough of us that can spread the word

[@LJ13222]

i am a fully able-bodied person and watching your videos has really opened my eyes. Obviously i never try to say something offensive or rude but just seeing your perspective on this makes me more aware of the things i say in general. love your videos!!!

[@Wheelsnoheels]

thank you so much for taking the time to comment. Im glad it has helped you. xx

[@mywanderingwheels]

THANK YOU for watching this and trying to understand.

[@seariakett6929]

I'm in a wheelchair and I was, once again, waiting patiently for an able bodied person to finish up in the Handicapped stall. ALL of the other stalls in the Ladies Room were completely empty by the way. When the woman FINALLY finished she came out and actually said to me ... "Just give me a minute to wash my hands and then I'll help you get undressed." ??? WTF ??? I'm 54 years old and perfectly capable of going to the bathroom myself thank you very much. I told her, thank you but her assistance wasn't need. She then told me of course it was and it was okay because she was a Home Care Aide. She actually started tugging on my purse to take it away from me and then on my shirt all the while I was outside of the stall. I finally had to yell at her and physically push her away. She said that I was being unreasonable and she was just trying to help. I told her that if she was a man and had put her hands on me like that I would have had her charged with sexual assault. She finally stopped touching me and before leaving the bathroom she told me how UNGRATEFUL I was for not letting a complete stranger strip me naked in the middle of the Ladies Room and stormed off. This is just one example I have experienced in which people assume that my body and wheelchair are public property and they can do anything they want to "to help me" without my permission.

[@TheMazinoz]

She was so arrogant and narcissicistic. Unfortunately I've met a few nurses and paramedics and doctors like that too. I'm beginning to wonder if I should get a panic alarm button to protect myself from these "aggressive helpers".

[@mywanderingwheels]

WOW

[@emberacademicservices-sara5115]

I'm so scared of using a motorized wheelchair due to this. And cost. I'm so scared it will make the constant threat of and occasional actual assaults worse or more frequent, which I endure almost every time i leave my house and park. I'm in north Florida in the "progressive" city that seems more *regressive* compared to everywhere else I've ever been... they keep asking "why I don't" at voc rehab. Because you able bodied people keep attacking me, and I don't want more of you to see a target... how about that?

[@miriamharris-kaplan6997]

I’m sorry you went through dealing with this piece of garbage.

[@Leahintrigued]

The run over peoples feet thing does happen in America too. They apologize almost everytime. I get people telling me I'm just lazy. Like if I tried harder I wouldn't be disabled.

[@Wheelsnoheels]

*eye roll* yeah people just don't understand. xx

[@MrWereWolfGirl]

I swear some people are just straight dumb, I don't have a visible disability but I have panic attacks and meltdowns I can't help, I also have some hearing issues, asthma and anxiety, and the amount of times I was told that I should just smile and be happy chappy and all will go away is so stupid .-." Especially asthma, I am stuck with it for life, meds help a little bit but I still get major attacks if I get spooked or get a panic attack, and the meds take a bit to kick in and so many people can suddenly be doctors and are like: "Just breathe normally and it will pass." if I could breathe normally don't you think that I would instead of wheezing and hoping not to run out of air and suffocate?

[@SnoozleTheWaterWizard]

Ah yes those darn lazy disabled people, because having a disablility means your just not trying hard enough. -_- *facepalms*

[@MrWereWolfGirl]

Some people's logic I swear, you don't know if you'd laugh at them or cry because of how stupid they are .-."

[@sunshineespeon517]

Honestly, if someone in a wheelchair ran over my foot, I probably would apologize. If someone walking by stepped on my foot, I'd probably apologize. It's just because I view myself as in the way in that situation.

[@janinebean4276]

"You can't wake up in the morning? Just get up! I get up every day so you can! Just try harder! Just make yourself do it!" ....yeah okay lol

[@Wheelsnoheels]

ugh thats tiring in its self! xx

[@louiserees4]

Stumbled across your channel, I must say having a disability that isn't always visible you have given me the confidence , I don't need a chair yet but looking at a rollator to be able to achieve things on life, and totally agree with the way I have been treated especially with family that have said, you don't need that surely x

[@floofthebird525]

My favorite one "But you went out without your cane a few weeks ago!" Yeah, not all illnesses and disabilities are consistent. Some of us do have better days ya know! If I can go out for a short trip without one of my hands being taken up by a cane Imma take the opportunity, even if it means I'm limping about, I still like having both hands free for a change!

[@Wheelsnoheels]

yep I know what you mean. :)

[@theblackzodiacqueen6600]

big mood though

[@SandraFrancisca]

I work 3 days a week in a supermarket and someone once said "yeah thats what i would do too..... being lazy and sit down all day doing nothing"......... excuse me?????!!!!! Hello?????!!!!! I'm working here!!!!!!!! It's not that i'm sitting down in my wheelchair just for fun........

[@Wheelsnoheels]

WHAT!!! Ugh people.!

[@June-rb1nx]

There's a man who is in a wheelchair at the supermarket I shop at. He is what is known as a greeter.....Some people aren't very nice to him, which I think is ridiculous. People are so nasty at times....This man chose to try to work, rather than sit home and do nothing and collect disability payments. I am always shocked at how people react to me.....so, I am very surprised at some of the things you say people do, when you are out and about in your wheelchair. My disability cant' be "seen"...and unfortunately I have heard a lot from people when I park in a designated Handicapped Parking space.....the nasty comments I have heard, you wouldn't believe.

[@SandraFrancisca]

June1708 i can't drive but we can park on special parking places too. And when the rest of the family gets out of the car people are staring! Pfffff

[@user-qh1um8zf6y]

I’ve heard so many of these said to my mum time and time again 🤦🏽‍♀️ she’s got ME so days are up and down, but she has a blue badge, an assisted wheelchair, mobility scooter, and many a walking stick depending on the day. Most recently we went to a shopping centre and I drove (she can drive but I offered to that day) and I pulled into a disabled bay, got out of the car clearly able bodied, and an elderly man started shouting from a few cars over that I’m ignorant, taking things from the disabled, etc. I just walked around to the back of the car, got out the wheelchair and helped my mum into it not saying a word. Looked back at him and he looked so sheepish and was bright red! Don’t ever assume what you don’t know!!

[@Wheelsnoheels]

Ugh I hate this! yes this happens to us. People will watch my husband (able bodied) until they see him getting my char!!

[@teganshadow3509]

Because I can walk a tiny bit using crutches or leaning on my wheelchair someone from my uni said "shes only in a wheelchair for benefits." I was so upset and angry and could not believe what just came out of her mouth. My whole day was ruined cuz of that.

[@bluechord2928]

I have multiple disabilities and two learning disorders and I've genuinely had a lot of either "Really? Are you sure you have all those problems?" no! I'm sure my doctors and educational psychologists just lied to me, and "aren't you a bit young to have all those problems" like there's some age limit on being disabled

[@dancerockslife]

"YOU'RE TO PRETTY TO BE IN A WHEELCHAIR"???? Really??? How stupid! I cannot believe those comments. Actually, I can and that's the sad part :( Gem, I know I have told you many times before: You are AWESOME 💕

[@dancerockslife]

And I a cry laughing at your acting. It must be frustrating sometimes but I love how you deal with it!

[@Wheelsnoheels]

awww thats babe!!! yeah when i hear other peoples shocking story's I'm like..yeah i actually can believe that!!! You just have to laugh and move on. :)

[@mywanderingwheels]

I've gotten this same thing on multiple occasions. WTH?

[@terrasilvershade5678]

I hate being confronted by people when they see me walking. They act like they just caught me in a lie and it’s their job to bring me to justice. It’s so annoying to have to continually explain to people about my disability(POTS and arthritis) and that I am able to walk. It’s like I have to defend my case against an attorney and it happens almost every time I take out the trash.

[@samthescotsman]

one time back when i was in a manual chair i was waiting at a checkout with my mum (bear in mind i have an extreme pain condition in my right leg) and a man pushed me into the counter and crushed my legs deliberately. my mum was paying and having to concentrate on the money (she is dyslexic) so she didn't notice but after she finished and saw me holding back tears she got really angry but the guy was long gone. on the plus side one the best experience i had was going into a subway with my mum and the lady serving who turned out to be the manager lifted up the food shield so she could talk to me directly and she also asked how i had found the accessibility as she was trying to make the shop as wheelchair friendly as possible. this was great as i usually get completely ignored like you said. i have autism and ptsd as well so that doesn't help with dealing with people.

[@Wheelsnoheels]

thank you for giving us a positive story too. Happy holidays. xx

[@mywanderingwheels]

!!!!!!!

[@sunny4lady]

''Oh! It's good to see you outside!'' That really infuriates me - yes I actually live a normal life and go out and about! And during the winter I like to stay inside more because its COLD outside...just like everybody else!

[@addisonwolsiffer9952]

I am speechless. I have nothing to say about this. I am absolutely shocked. Has the world really come to this?

[@urbanhawk2886]

Yep I can definitely relate to everything you mentioned but I did also have a new experience today lol. I was in the tin section in Tesco and some woman came up behind me, I didnt realise she was there and instead off asking if I could move. She decided to push my wheelchair out of her way to get the tin she wanted. Got my own back though I pushed myself back to where I was before she could get it and ran over her foot in the process 😂😂

[@Wheelsnoheels]

OMG wow!! I haven't experienced this. There are some other people who have said similar things though. Wow I can't believe that happened!!! Gota love a bit of karma though. ;)

[@atonyathehun6639]

Good for you cause I might a grabbed them by the hair $ threw on the floor for scaring me. I was an abused child & don’t react well to folks popping up in my bubble n touching me!!!

[@dcpink7498]

One of my favourites is when I need to pass someone and say excuse me and they reply with, " oh I'm sorry, I didn't see you DOWN there " with a sympathetic sorry tone, I always reply with "where else would I be" lmao

[@Wheelsnoheels]

hahah oops!! I had one just like this, except she said "OHHH i didn't see you there, maybe we should get you a little bell!!!" Umm nooooOOo lady I'm not a freaking cat!!!

[@user-gv5di8yp9w]

My sister has been in a wheelchair since she was a baby and can’t do much on her own in her state, but people are always thinking it’s gonna make me breakdown if they ask me a question about her! (She can not talk either) but I respond with “ it’s fine she’s been like this since she was born” and people are like “ that’s so TRAAAGGGIC”

[@Wheelsnoheels]

ahhh i know what thats like. sometimes people react like that when i explain my injury. But we have to move on, adapt and get on with life. Does your sister communicate by sign? and dose she get out? xx

[@user-gv5di8yp9w]

she is what alot of people consider special and she can talk, but its like teaching a baby to talk, she can get syllables out and some words but not alot

[@chooselivingbysteven3373]

Unfortunately, I am not surprised by any of those comments. Some people are uneducated/ignorant/naive/stupid (delete as appropriate!) but I must say things are improving all the time. No doubt videos like yours are helping.

[@Wheelsnoheels]

ahhh thank you. Yes i belong to a SCI Facebook page, and these topic comes up now and again, and unfortunately its not shocking. But you are right, things are getting better. My accident happened when i was 9, and I have defo seen improvements over the years. :)

[@chooselivingbysteven3373]

We need to accept there will always be arsehole's around and people who just don't think before they speak. I feel more 'accepted' in society than I did just 10 years ago when I had my accident. Or maybe I have just grown in confidence and don't let things bother me. Anyway, great video!

[@dennishein2812]

Depending on my mood sometimes I say “I’m just too lazy to walk” and other times when they ask what happened to me I say “ life caught up with me but I had fun getting this way”. My wife was born with cp and is also in a chair. She’s heard some really wild ones.

[@sketch__5972]

This video and all these comments are making me feel so much better. There is no stopping the rudeness of people so you have to just *cough* roll right past. I was thinking about getting a cane just to put out on public display that I can walk, so maybe when I have to stand up for some reason I'm not getting told off, or receiving the endless glares... but I don't think that will stop it.

[@rosesnow2013]

Omg this is 100% relatable!! 😂🙌🏼😭. My disability is not an ice breaker- love it!

[@skystrife_gaming7949]

I'm not disabled but i know people who are, one that they get often when in wheelchairs is people trying to take over and drive their wheelchairs for them, without permission, or even talking to them at all beforehand. When my friends tell them to stop or leave them alone the other people always get either flustered or offended that their help wasn't wanted or needed. Its so weird

[@erin4930]

I have had that happen to me a lot....people have forced help on me.....now I find that because I have said in those times that I don't need the help that those people just standing around and watch me physically struggle to do whatever it is....if your not sure if I need help just ask but don't be offended if I say no.

[@TheMazinoz]

Why is it that people think that because you have a disability you are "less than" and entitled to treat you with disrespect?

[@mywanderingwheels]

There's someone on etsy who makes spiked wheelchair handle covers to solve this problem.

[@kikitinkerbell]

I relate to all of these. every time I go anywhere and ask for assistance the person will talk to who ever i'm with as if i'm deaf...or I was in Malta a few years ago and the guide turned to my mam and asked 'can she hear okay' as if because I am in a wheelchair, I can't hear...I get the "why are you in that' question. I get drunk people or religious people 'praying for me' and that just irks me because i'm not religious, I get people that say 'move out of the way of the wheelchair' as if i'm not there at all. Our bus drivers in Ireland are jerks and if its busy and there's a buggy... you're supposed to fold the buggy to allow for disabled passengers, but some just shrug it off and say there's no room...I've been disabled my whole life and in a wheelchair for two thirds of my life and it gets harder to deal with. some days I just laugh it off or joke, but other days it actually makes me so upset I cry myself to sleep...but this video cheered me up so thank you so much for this relatable topic

[@Wheelsnoheels]

awwwww We all get tough days. And yes sometimes it makes me cry at night too. Hugs from me. Im glad this vide made light of it for a bit. xx

[@moonlight-ps3di]

I have the opposite problem in shopping centres, people don't move they don't respect personal space, they will literally stand right at my wheel whilst I'm looking lean right over my head like I'm not there!!!! and I'm like oh I'm sorry because I'm shoulder height with ur stomach am I not here?????? I have on few occasions knowing they are there gone to push myself away with my elbows out and elbowed them and they just stare at me like. "wait it moves????" I'm just there like "sorry I didn't see your tall standing up self leaning over me". on the good side I have met 2 amazing humans in all my time in a wheelchair, complete strangers, the first time I was doing a bit of food shopping and i was fully wheelchair bound that day, a lovely lady working on the till actually held up the line to help me pack my bags, it's a small gesture but the first I ever experienced! the second was, I was waiting at a table in a cafe near the till whilst my mum brought the drinks over, this lovely women in the line comes up to me and says "there is a lady who has been coming to the church that I go to for 12 years is in a wheelchair and she always says to go up to people in a wheelchair and say hello because people in wheelchairs always get ignored"! this is so true in my case I always get ignored and treated as if invisible, and i nearly cried because it was such a nice thing! anyway thanks for reading my rant, have a nice day.

[@Wheelsnoheels]

thank you for your comment. :)

[@moonlight-ps3di]

Thankyou for your reply I have only found your channel recently and can't wait to binge watch all your vids, I think your a great role model to everyone xx

[@babypoof]

Evelyn Chapman my best friend is disabled and a lot of times when shes walking in the hallway at school, students literally nearly trample her. Like sometimes i have to stand in front of her and literally push them out of the way because no one gives her time or space.

[@moonlight-ps3di]

baby poof that's what my mum/ anyone who's with me has to do as well, I can tell you your friend appreciates that a lot not many people realize how stressful it can be in a wheelchair/or when having to go at your own pace! when your practically surrounded by giants lol.

[@babypoof]

Evelyn Chapman lol yeah. Like no one can wait a couple minutes, NONE of then have patience

[@greydoe]

Hi. New to your channel, and in the US. I didn't think anything could make me laugh - it's been a very rough month! But then I heard you talking about (well-meaning) people yelling "MAKE WAY! MAKE WAY!" and I literally laughed so hard my housemate came to see what was so funny. lol I have a good short story for you in the same vein... I was still able to walk at the time, parked my car in the disabled parking space in front of a store. I was with a good friend of mine. When I walked past an elderly couple, the woman said to the man, "She doesn't look disabled!" My friend turned to her and said, "And you don't look ignorant, either, but you are." I could hardly control my laughter. Have a great one!

[@Wheelsnoheels]

hahah thats amazing. Ill have to use that one ;) Glad you enjoyed the video. :)

[@angangieangela5216]

Every day, literally every single day someone will say ‘Oh do you need help’ with only the best intentions I’m sure; that said I often wonder what do they imagine I do when they’re not there to ‘help’ me?!?

[@StikFigureChik74]

I really needed the giggles I just got whilst watching this. I can relate to all of these and then some. Besides my wheels, I nearly always have my assistance dog by my side. Kima is the main reason I can live a mostly independent life, but she does have a way of incurring even more comments and questions. I don't mind people offering their assistance when shopping - and honestly appreciate it when it comes to getting things from top shelf - but the "you're shopping by yourself? that's such an inspiration!" comments make me want to run over the offender's feet!! I **generally** am good at biting my tongue, esp if my nephew is with me, but I've been known to give a sarcastic reply or two. Cam, on the other hand, is quick to come to my defence with a snarky remark when he knows I'm nearly out of patience. He's 12 1/2 and generally is an extremely polite young man, but he's starting to become quite protective of me. It really bothers him to no end to have people speak over me and ask him (or anyone else with us) what is wrong with me. Lately, before I can silence him with a look or a touch on the arm, he'll snap back with a loud "NOTHING!! What's wrong with YOU besides being an idiot?!?" I know Cam loves me and because he does is protective, but I need to figure out a way to address this with him before it escalates a situation. Anyone have any pointers for talking to a tweenage boy about this? Gotta check out some more of your videos. I subscribed after watching this one!

[@Wheelsnoheels]

Hi there. Thanks for subbing. Really glad you enjoyed the video. Hmmmmm I don't have much experience with tweens, my daughter is nearly 9, so a few more years and ill be there!!! Im currently editing a video on how to "talk to disabled people for the fist time." Bit nervous about it, and not sure how it looks yet. Il will be up soon i hope, and i hope this might help your nephew. In the mean time ill have a think. Im sure as he grows up, he will find a more diplomatic way. x

[@moppleinga7025]

Worst worst is "whats wrong with you then" sometimes with "if you don't mind me asking"..yesyes i do mind but now it is too late. being forced to relive it everytime you go for milk is not fun. it makes me feel like they think i owe them my entire life intimate details which they feel entitled to know "Because its their tax money"-thankyou newpapers and government,,it spoils my day quite often-especially when they dont give up. all the thank yous get exhausting and i find it lowers my self esteem,,as if i have to have everyone make efforts for me to just go shopping. there was the shop lady who huffs and puffs when i can't lift the dog food onto the till.. what do you recomend as retorts to this? we in the uk are so polite and they seem to need you to be super nice all the time-its like a pressure to be angelic. i find it very very stressful. as i want to reply that i dont like what theyre saying to me..but dont now how or what to say. yes i get the "oh its paid for" sooo much..and im like no..no it is not..its about 500-3000 just for one..and i have to have several different chairs, they go wrong, some are backup, some are for rough terrain, some are for the bus which only take certain types.and some are for decent mobility in the house thats narrow. oh your van is paid for surely..no its not..needing a powerchair adaptation is NOT included in that..only manual chair adaptation. dont get me started on all the aids you have to buy, taxis when your bus already has awheelchair user on it (they wont take two-health and safety) taxi for 25 miles..ouch! "always have a smile on your face" "good to see you out and about" work related ones are so horrid-theyd never ask if you were not in a chair.. "so where do you work" "what do you do then"..and you can tell its passive aggressive by the the look in their eyes. normally no stranger would come up and say that!esp before knowing your name!come on. when they ask what i have its clearly so they can judge whether i should be in a chair or not! when i do say something i get "so and so couldnt walk but she refused to give up-her mother told her she had toforthe kids and you know she did it.." ??????? assumptions you are paralysed-then get funny looks when you transfer or move your feet-suspicious looks-and it sure as hell is not nice. to transfer with every single eye of the cafeteria focused on you. it seems youre out on display to be assessed and judged. over time ive notice ive become reluctant to go out sometimes as i just hate the staring alone. its just crappy. some people stay in or neaer their car to watch me do the five minute entry into mine..looking through my windows..before they start their engine. how would they like it? some people start a conversation, dont ask my name, then it becomes clear theyre leading up to the what happened to you question..you answer then they just go-one feels used! medical staff are the worst too. not doctors generally but nurses or hca's i get panic when they just grab my chair after ive transferred and wheel it away-how about asking? seeing as you seem to know how to show your displeasure, could you do a video on things to say back? x

[@Wheelsnoheels]

wow thank you for taking the time to comment. Yes it can be hard sometimes. I think about how i can do a video, I can relate to everything you are saying. xx

[@moppleinga7025]

xx i went on a bit-lol :@) yes people don't realise the spotlight you get put under-hard for anyone let alone someone super shy. i wasnt before, and now i am, as one spends time avoiding stares and comments-which sucks x

[@Wheelsnoheels]

awwww Im sorry to hear that. Yeah its almost like being famous lol!!! You stand out a lot. as usually you are the only disabled person in the shop etc. I have made a video on how to feel more confident on wheels. Im not sure it will help. I don't know about you, but i have just become de-sensitised to it now. just used to it. xx

[@moppleinga7025]

I am hoping it will come with time that i get used to it too x

[@andycraddock7677]

Thank you Gem for sharing and greetings from across the pond in the State of Colorado. I found myself unfortunately nodding my head with so much of what you shared. I’m actually new to a chair and unlike so many users I don’t have a SC injury but use and need a WC just as much. I’m sorry for the comments you’ve endured. Expect many if not all of us have from mean, ignorant or occasionally well-meaning (presumably) but misinformed people. I’ve actually had total strangers walk up to me and say things like “You just use that cause you want the attention!” Ahhh, yes. Myself and my insurer (after a wheelbarrow of paperwork) spent nearly $3,000 on a pointless chair I have no need for, the things that require us chair users twice as long to complete, the endless modifications I’ve had to make to my home, transportation headaches- you know the story. Unfortunately it seems like the same here in the US. Wishing you a happy and good life and please keep the great posts coming. I’ve learned so much. Thank you again.

[@mywanderingwheels]

Right? Like it is somehow easier to have an expensive chair and all the headaches that go with it than to walk?

[@katharinamonch4223]

The part where everybody jumps out of the way like crazy I hate completely! I have seen people actually hurting themselves doing it!

[@tranquility9325]

I have an invisible condition, fibromyalgia. Ppl can have it in degrees of mild, moderate or severe, and it can vary from any of those at any time. I am unable to work as a result. I made the mistake of telling this to a broad who works at the cable company. She sat back in her chair, with her arms folded across her chest and said... Well my friend has fibromyalgia, and she's able to work. I calmly explained to her about how not everyone experiences this condition are the same. I dislike her as a result of her ignorant comment, and lost quite a bit of respect for her.

[@FabrayFashions]

The only time I have found the disability to be an actual ice breaker is when the other person has a disability too. i.e. i have spoken to and even gotten helpful tips from disabled veterans

[@TheMazinoz]

Yes, I'd sometimes disclose I had a disability to others when working for a charity to assist people with a disability. Also I did a cybersecurity class that was chocker with vets with illnesses / disabilities, so told them too.

[@tacticlee2872]

I laughed the whole way through this video! It's all so true! Either you're invisible in the mall with everyone suddenly inspecting the ceiling as you roll past or the act like Moses parting the waters of people!

[@MsJimmysgirl]

I totally understand what you mean. I have degenerative disk disease due to a car wreck in my early 20's and I get so tired of people asking me what is wrong with my neck being that it is obvious I can only turn my head ever so slightly.

[@mobilemermaid5414]

I got one for you : it took a year for my doctor to actually finally decide to have me go through an Xray, and MRI insisting I wasn't paralyzed " I am: due to physical abuse" turns out, today actually that a neurologist provided a very involved and way too personal examination to determine that "Surprise" i was telling the truth, but for literally a year my doctors, physicians and even family would ask the same question over and over again " can you walk" or " can you move your legs" or " can you stand" even after I explained several times to each of these professionals that I couldn't. I almost wonder if some medical professionals have a sort of intolerance of paralyzed patients.

[@KiKiQuiQuiKiKi]

I think most doctors are uncomfortable around people with medical issues!

[@roxyndra]

What a beautiful introductory video! I'm not often asked these things as of late, as most people in my life these days are better acquainted and informed. But indeed, making new friends and navigating all this stuff can be difficult. It's really helpful to have someone else help navigate. It's hard to inform people without seeming rude. Thank you.

[@lebenaufraedern]

Due to Multiple Sclerosis I'm in a wheelchair for five years now. The most stupid advise was "oh, just drop some 20 kilos or more and you can walk again" ... directly followed by "go where you live, you don't belong here"

[@kidswright2986]

I broke both of my legs once and couldn't walk for like 3 to 5 years but my teacher in 4th grade had the nerve to say on my first week of being in the chair said "Oh your fine get up." I couldn't I hadn't even started physical therapy and I told her that and she made people hold me up while she grabbed my chair and threw it across the room. I couldn't stand without leaning on something. She got fired and when more than one person kept saying that it was annyoning. I'm out of the chair but still wobbly. (I mean no offense to any else in a chair it's like real hard experience.)

[@Wheelsnoheels]

ugh thats horrendous!! you poor thing. I had a few horrible teachers too. :(

[@margalothegreat_hams]

Wow that is so rude. My mom has a friend who is visually impaired, and once their professor said "No dogs in the classroom" even though it was her guide dog. The professor was going to tie the dog to a tree outside even though she kept telling him that it was her working dog, but he said that she was disobeying the rules and that some people might be allergic to dogs. Luckily she had her cane in her backpack and went to tell the headmaster. Guy got fired. He totally deserved it.

[@mywanderingwheels]

OH MY GOD.

[@neilbanschbach1508]

I, too, am using a wheelchair and people can say the darnedest things. I love your videos and you are such an encouragement to, I'm sure, so many people. This video was really funny. Thanks so much for putting a smile on people's faces. Congrats on having a beautiful daughter and an amazing supportive husband!!! Blessings to you and your journey!!!!

[@notdaisyadoptme6907]

wow!!! its pretty crazy what people say. I know a friend of mine sometimes gets asked by complete strangers if the can "pray for him"

[@Wheelsnoheels]

oh dear, yes i have had that too. :9 people just don't think 😃

[@brittanyfox8873]

People do that to me all the time. I don’t mind it a bit because I know they are doing it cuz they care. They may not have all the facts right but it’s the thought that counts and I appreciate that they care enough to ask and in alot of cases they stop and pray for me on the spot. It makes me feel good knowing there are people that care about me and my struggles even if they don’t know me.

[@glamzebra410]

Yeah I get that a lot too. What's funny is when they lay hands on me...then ask if I mind!! Lol I normally just go with it because I figure it's positive energy headed my way! :)

[@glamzebra410]

"Oh so you're the cripple girl!" That was said to me when someone thought I was just sitting in someone else's wheelchair. Then when they realized it was mine, they said "well you just looked so comfortable". So I'm not supposed to be comfortable?? I have also gotten "You're too beautiful, too young, too happy to be in a wheelchair. It must be nice to be able to just ride around everywhere." One time I fell in a parking lot and a guy walked by and asked if I lost my car! I dont know if he thought he was being funny?Then there is all the dumb comments I get about my service dog! Like "I wish I could take my dog everywhere, that's one spoiled dog". People definitely say some weird things! I wish they would open their minds or at least think before they speak!

[@TheRealMythril]

Pretty much dealt with every one of these situations over the years, from when I was able to get by with a single stick, to crutches, self propel wheelchair and with a few new additions since the powered wheelchair! Usually the powered wheelchair inspires panic either that or the odd lift ( elevator for Americans) syndrome which usually entails people behaving as if you are highly infectious and refusing either to let you in a lift that has clear space, or that they refuse to share the lift with you even if there is a ton of space free in it! This is usually amplified if there are children present!

[@Wheelsnoheels]

oh no thats terrible :( I'm sorry that happens. xxx

[@roxyandharrisonsbestlife6509]

sometimes when I'm in an elevator here in the US (I would be in my powerchair) I will get into the small elevator first, head in so I can turn around facing the doors. However, at times people will rush in behind me so I can't turn around, and then I have to ride the whole way facing the back wall!

[@jasonosborn5726]

i have multiple sclerosis so i look just fine on the out side. if i go food shopping on my own, i have to use the store scooters. i get all kinds of mean looks from people. or if im in my wheelchair some people even when they see me coming and know there is no other way around still dont move so i can get past

[@Wheelsnoheels]

awww bet thats annoying. :S

[@jasonosborn5726]

Wheelsnoheels yes it is. And what is bad I live right by the Villages Florida, witch is quickly becoming (if not already) the retirement capital of the nation. So you would think people would be more mindful of those in wheelchairs. Nope why would they be concerned about others.

[@TheMazinoz]

@@jasonosborn5726 I'm considering doing this for a very large shopping mall and even if only going to one shop. I have Ehlers Danlos and am "getting on". Here they have "power shoppers" which I think are like elec wheelchairs. You have to book in advance, have evidence etc. The "shit" I might experience concerns me before I've even tried!

[@Aelffwynn]

Even as just a friend of a physically disabled person, it really annoys me the looks and comments some people think are okay. A close friend of mine has cerebral palsy (he uses crutches or a walker) and occasionally we run errands together. Inevitably, people stop to congratulate me on how helpful I am to this poor disabled man. We have learned to laugh at it, but it's annoying because they assume that I'm doing it out of charity/pity and not because we're just friends hanging out together. We're FRIENDS! No one calls me an "angel" for going to the grocery store with people who can walk.

[@WildKat25]

I have the wonderfully invisible disability Fibromyalgia. Which basically means my brain is sending false pain signals all over my body (for me it tends to be very painful in my chest area). These false pain signals cause my muscles to contract in order to try and "protect" where the pain signal says it should be. Thus, causing me to be fatigued all the time and I sleep at least 12 hours a day in order to do simple tasks. The best advice I always get is to "get up and go to the gym or go for a walk." "Change your diet and cook super healthy food." All I can think is that one trip anywhere requires a nap immediately after. The whole thing about this disability is that moving and doing anything hurts and is super tiring. The energy and pain it would cause to try and make one super healthy meal is just not worth it. Asking to sit in the disability areas always ends with a few nasty stares like I am lying since I am in my late twenties. I have to carry around a cane just so people will let me sit in the disability seats on the bus.

[@Wheelsnoheels]

awww. I hate how people with invisible disabilities are discriminated against. Ill be making a video on this to raise awareness. :)

[@WildKat25]

Wheelsnoheels Thanks so much! I know my poor husband gets so frustrated trying to defend me from being called lazy; especially since he gets to see my suffering that others don't. Raising awareness is the best thing that anyone can do for someone like me. So thank you!

[@vampers3]

I have considered the cane thing myself. I take public transit to school because parking downtown or driving downtown is a pain. but the Max (train) is always full so I Have to stand. I don't feel disabled enough to sit in the handicap area because people can't see it. Explaining it always ends up with people telling me how to rid my body of fibro or how so in so has it and they do this that and are fine. I work and go to school but standing more than 10 min kills me and fatigues me. Thats just my feet! they don't know the rest of my body is also killing me!

[@felixgarnet]

A nap? Like a five hour one??? I need a week in bed after anything more exciting than Coronation Street. ;-)

[@TheMazinoz]

@spirals 73 Maybe you need to make some new friends.

[@Ezlivin]

I was given a religious pamphlet for a "healing" evangelist and invited to the service. The pamphlet spoke of miraculous healings and even said, "George literally leaped from his wheelchair." I am still waiting to leap from my wheelchair....

[@Wheelsnoheels]

Oh goodness. Yes I have had people ask if they can "pray for me."

[@Trekkifulshay]

One time I declined a religious hand out only for the woman to put it in the basket of my daughter's wheelchair without asking. Maybe god needs to heal the tactless first.

[@tinnybird1971]

That's so fake I don't even believe that.

[@Ezlivin]

@@tinnybird1971 Too bad I didn't keep the pamphlet then.

[@scottyletsplays9649]

I love this girl so much the whole time I was sitting on my couch screaming I KNOW RIGHT

[@yvonnejackson3451]

I've had a man in a theater complain about me laughing at a comedy play, at the end he said "you're lucky they let you out these days, a few year's ago you would have had to stay indoors" but the one I get frequently is mainly from older ladies, they pat my head or knees and say "ah bless you you're doing well to get out" "ah are you having a nice ride out?"

[@Wheelsnoheels]

Omg this comment made me so mad!!! I can't believe you get/got treated like that!!! xx

[@mywanderingwheels]

This is sickening!

[@waltkahn]

thank you for making this video. my wife is mobility impaired and walks with a cane 99.99% of the time. Since she can't walk long distances, we keep a wheelchair in the car for when she needs it. I have found that the few days that she is doing really well and does not need the cane (VERY few and between these days) compared to when she does have her cane, even though she still walks slowly, people still are a lot nicer about giving up their seat or moving out the way if she has her cane with her or in her wheelchair. When we got together 18 years ago her disabilities were a lot more hidden than they are now, even though they were still there. Back then we would get looks from people when she went slower than normal or used her HP Parking Permit. I do not have a HP Parking Permit, but as I get older I found that I'm in more pain and sometimes use a cane to help me walk, I also found that those days that most people will hold doors open for me, and will get out my way faster.

[@susancolberg935]

I had a neighbor who’s father had passed. I planned on going to the wake with my husband. At the time he was not accepting my disability. I have Spinocerebellar Ataxia (SCA) and cannot walk and have no balance, so I’m in a wheelchair. My husband told me I shouldn’t go because I’d be taking the attention away from the family! The next day I know he went to the neighbors to ask if it was alright for me to go because he didn’t bring it up again. He finally came around to accepting it and helping me, especially since my symptoms have progressed.

[@rockykoast7065]

Though a relatively new wheelchair user, I've already experienced 90% of the things you talk about..the tilt of pavements towards the road ( when I first experienced that I thought 'how the heck are you meant to keep going in a straight line?'- so I went on KZbin, discovered some helpful channels like yours..& realised you just have to tire out one arm at a time..). Living in France and not being an attractive young woman I've not experienced some of the things you talk about,lol, but I have been 'kidnapped' - had someone grab my wheelchair & push me across the road! This is alarming in different levels..it's scary a complete stranger taking control of your vehicle uninvited..but also because often the kerb us not lowered quite enough to get over it without popping a wheelie and you know your wheelchair could come to a sudden halt, you could get thrown onto the ground...People being 'toi helpfulness.Mmmm. yes. Got that one ticked...but overall kindness is preferable to the opposite...Keep up the good work!

[@SarahKDB]

I hate is when people say "Oh my God, what's wrong with you!?" Also, I get the "you don't look disabled," all of the time.

[@tinnybird1971]

I get this too. I get it when I tell people I have cataracts and they always tell me I don't look like I have cataracts. Always tell them, If I don't have cataracts, Then I WOULDN'T be asking you to read that sign or asking you what bus that is coming from a distance. Or if you can please read the menu on the side of the food trailer. You don't have to look disabled to be disabled it could be due to a condition. Don't people realize this? Damn! They are so stupid! Not knowing that they can become disabled someday & people are going to tell them the same thing.

[@TheMazinoz]

@@tinnybird1971 I have to admit, I pray for it to happen to some of them.

[@anjilou1027]

I have found that when I am in my chair (because yes, we can walk/stand, etc sometimes as, surprise! Not everyone in a wheel chair is paralysed) people will be over the top "helpful" and apologetic because they don't want to "offend" me. I personally believe that this has come from this country (england) being a tad too political in what is correct and not correct to say to certain people and on top of that it constantly changes too! So people never have a clue whether it is offensive to help or not help these days. I have only had the "it's a mirical" comment made once by an old man when I stood from my chair to reach something on the shelf that I couldn't reach sitting down and mum was getting something from a part of the shop my chair doesn't fit in so she couldn't get it for me. I do however get plenty of looks when I stand or transfer into a chair at a table when we eat (because sitting all day really is not great and it gets uncomfortable. So even a change of chair can be a small relief sometimes) and there are plenty of people that make comments to the person they are with that are rather inappropriate or rude. I get "hop along" soooooo much! I often use my sticks to walk unless its a long trip out then I use my chair and this is what gets the hop along "jokes" so I am forever explaining how inaccurate that is and that if they want to make a "joke" a much better one would be penguin or ducky as I waddle rather than hop. This gets rather amusing looks because people seem to find it shocking that not only do I call them on their bad joke but I give them a better one to use! I hope that it makes people think before they speak but if not then it gives me a giggle every time I see the look on their faces when I make a joke about myself :) sorry this kinda went in a bit :/ whoops

[@Wheelsnoheels]

I'm totally with you with the transfer thing. I transfer where possible, as i get very achy and sore. Its hard for people to understand, so its nice to meet someone who is like me. Thank you for your comment. :)

[@anjilou1027]

Wheelsnoheels it's nice to have found your channel and even better than you replied to my comment! :) it is definitely hard for people to understand, even my mum was amazed last night as she had a glimpse into how I view the world. We went out to meet dad at the pub for a work thing where the work people get to meet his family but when we got there mum found out he had yet to eat all day (and he is diabetic! Silly man) so mum said she would go to the shop to get him food and I went with her. Normally when mum and I are out we are inside a shop, it is soooo rare that we walk anywhere together and every time we came to cross the road I would pull her round the corner a little bit so I could use the dip in the curb rather than struggling with getting off the high curb. On the way back (it was only about a 10 minute walk, shorter if you're the average person who does not use aids. But it was a residential area so there was lots of roads to cross) she stopped and looked at me and said, "wow, sweetie I am sorry, I should really pay more attention to how much you have to look out for" in regards to me stopping her at every road so I could use the dip whereas she would use the curb. So yea, even someone who deals with and understands my disability still doesn't quite understand how much it takes to do every day things. Thank you for sharing this video, I hope it makes more people aware of what they say and do.

[@barbaracunningham964]

When I stand from my chair I usually say “it’s a miracle” myself to make people laugh and break the atmosphere. The remark I hate the most is. ‘What’s wrong with you”

[@acuriousperson9498]

Questioin for you and other people out there: Do you ever get stopped by people who in short say "can I pray for you"? Is this mostly an American thing? Like once I was at the mall with my mom and it was super busy (around christmas shopping season). We were eating at the food court and there was this big group of people (that I would later learn to be a church group) all in their 30's to 50's. I noticed that a few of them were staring at me we ate. I thought maybe they were mad we took a table near them or something because it seemed like they were waiting for us to leave. Eventually we finished, bussed our table, and started off to the next store. A bit down the way I'm stopped and surrounded by about 6 people in the middle of a /super/ busy walk way. One lady starts to talk to me and says "We're from (enter generic church name here) and we all saw that you were using a wheelchair" she went on for a bit before saying "we do this thing where we go to the mall and pray for disabled people. Can we pray for you?" This was mortifying, but let me break it down . 1) they assumed my life was SO horrible because of my chair that they needed to STOP me and my mom in the middle of a walk way to beg God to make my life less unfortunate? My life isn't that unbearable. That assumption is extremely rude and belittling. 2) The fact that they FOLLOWED ME is so creepy. 3) They go to the mall with the intention of following around disabled people?? That just left a bad taste in my mouth. And the biggest thing for me is the fact that it's so fake. They didn't want to actually help or hear my problems. They wanted to do a quick thing to make them feel like better people. If it were people at their church, friends, or people who asked, it would be different. This kind of stuff happens a lot (I live in the south, also). When this happened I was 17 (now 18) and had only been using my chair for under a year. It was my 3rd time using it in a mall. I was so freaked out and mixed with emotions that my mom had to step in to get them to leave me alone. Is this common? And is it common in other places? Thx (Also love this video

[@Wheelsnoheels]

This is a grate comment to raise awareness at how "can I pray for you" can actually be hurtful and not something all disabled people want.!!! Im in the UK and its only happened once, and the lady was quite nice and respectful when I said "NO." But the points you raise are very good. and these people should take note. and I'm sorry but i have NEVER seen in the news "quadriplegic, cured and walked from her wheelchair after she was prayed for!!!"

[@useAnEllipse]

Someone once wanted to pray for me in high school, between classes. He wasn't in my grade, and I'd never talked to him before in my life. I'm not religious at all but I let him because I thought, whatever, at the least he'll feel happy if I do. When he's done he asks me, "do you feel any better?" Son, I'm glad you have so much faith in God but even you must realize that thirty seconds of prayer does not instantly cure a lifelong disability. My friends told me I should have stood up (because I can stand for a short while) and shouted "PRAISE JESUS, I CAN WALK!" Would have been funny, but probably kind of mean, too. I live in America too, but up north. It is a weird thing to do for a stranger, and I agree that it's probably much more about making themselves feel like good Christians than actually trying to help disabled people.

[@mlsingleton90]

YES!! People always wanting to pray. Makes them feel noble or something.

[@patmccoy8758]

I've had that happen to me when I was hanging out with my Deaf friends. These total strangers physically grabbed onto us and started praying loudly! I remembered a Bible verse that says NOT to do that and quoted that verse at them. I have PTSD so they were lucky that I didn't lash out physically at them.

[@franlats0705]

I had someone ask me this the other week, I wasnt in my chair but I had stood up too fast and my POTs made me do the dizzy amni going to faint thing, and I got talking with her, I dont mind explaining my conditions as I believe they need more awareness and sure enough she didnt know about them. So she asked if she could pray for me, I said yes if she wanted to, I figured it wouldnt hurt me and I guess I just have a hard time saying no to people, I am a people pleaser hahaha, my faith is my own and I choose when and if I want to practice so this was odd for me but i think it may have helped her to process that these conditions exist and that people live everyday with the.

[@sharpma]

I was waiting at the bus stop one day heading to school and a guy looked at me , I nodded being polite and he proceeded to inform me that the reason I am disabled is because god is punishing me because of something I did in a past life. LOL!! My favorite one is when people talk down to me because it seems they think because my legs don't work well then my brain doesn't either.

[@Wheelsnoheels]

Omg what a horrible guy. Yes ppl are dumb.

[@jenniferddsanders]

I was in the military when I was injured. I gained some weight since then and I’ve actually had people say you wouldn’t be in that wheelchair if you lost weight. I was much thinner when I got in the wheelchair. So sad! I also like the way people try and push me all the time. I have had more bruised fingers that way, they get caught in the spokes or/and you push rooms. I hate waiting in line people always tell me “I could use the seat about right now”. I just want to have them.

[@ladyroxanew.600]

When parking they get mad at me for using the parking space. Then they see my chair and just walk off.

[@tinnybird1971]

That's because they want to use the parking space for themselves KNOWING that they don't have any disabilities. I see this all the time.

[@disneyqueen6319]

Due to my disability I'm a bit behind young people my own age. Such as they are all driving and going to university as for me I can't, I'm working in a job and still live at home. My English level and maths level isn't as high as my peers. But what I hated most back in school was that I was in a lower class than my friends depending on the level of academic but I let people get to me and say that I wasn't smart, that I was going to fail in life and you know what, although I didn't pass maths, I succeeded in English and now I'm working on a book based on a young person with a disability who is also a witch.

[@NicholasThorntonOfficial]

did you finish your book?

[@_Looktosee_]

It’s all so DAMN TRUE! I’m laughing so much now watching this, but it can be overly distressing when these things happen. You said everything perfectly, definitely and unfortunately true. ♥️♥️

[@N3RDYG0GGLES]

I have a couple/few invisible conditions and remember feeling really alone when I was coming back on my own from further down country via train (UK). I'd been to a pretty physically demanding training camp for my work and given that some of my issues involve minor pain and more major fatigue, even handling my bags was hell that day. I was too afraid to ever try to get help because I knew people would likely think I was just being lazy. But I felt a lot less alone when talking to this lass on the platform in a chair, it was a fancy electric one of some sort really prettily decorated with stickers (what actually caught my attention) and we turned out to be both artists and both loved colouring our hair. Sometimes it re-occurs to me how while it's important that people be aware of our disabilities and difficulties, it can be just as important to focus more on the person themselves and see them for who they are, not their equipment or aids. Maybe if more folks did, stupid harsh stuff like you listed wouldn't be said to anyone.

[@inthewindago]

The foot running over, overly apologetic issue. Sounds like something that happens in Canada also. We apologise all the time when it’s not our fault! Lol :)

[@jhroenigk]

The "make way" ppl who look about ready to jump out of their skin and/or dive off to one side, even though it was completely unnecessary and you both had plenty of room ... I really needed you to remind me that I'm in a wheelchair, thank you very much!

[@valerieannrumpf4151]

A few years ago , I was at the mall in holyoke ,Massachusetts and I was exiting Target headed towards sephora when some guy came up to me and said "how brave I was to be out shopping during the Christmas season", I told him that I had every right to be out shopping in my whèelchair just like everyone else who was running around like a nut getting their last minute shopping done.

[@mc8180]

Like the comments say, it seems to be a pretty common thing that people won’t stop looking at you....I don’t know why those people have never seen a wheelchair before! I really love your videos and that you have this great community where everyone can talk about this topic in the comments.👍🏻

[@Wheelsnoheels]

thank you. Yes its nice that people can all share and feel less alone here as we all have something in common. :)

[@mc8180]

Wheelsnoheels - Gem Hubbard I really want to thank you for your YT Channel ❤️

[@ambertyler2349]

I live in Oklahoma but grew up in Michigan, all my friends and family are there and in Florida. When we moved into our house the neighbors had a block party, a pampered chef party things of that nature. Well one day they starting talking about going on a lady's day shopping trip in Texas at the outlet malls and just planning a great day, then one lady looks at me and says well we'd like to ask you to come BUT.... we really have a ton of locations we want to get to and you would probably hold us up but maybe next time. I felt a huge lump growing in my throat and could feel tears fill my eyes so I turned to go home and said well I see not a problem ..... oh FYI if anyone had offered I would have said thank you unfortunately I have plans. BUT since you didn't just not invite me you had to go and say something that EVEN MY 2 YEAR OLD knows is just plain cruel and coldhearted so I'll say this ......... never mind you'd never understand because you have a collective IQ that is matched by what you have in your hearts...NOTHING! And as for next time don't waste the energy you may need it. After that I stopped talking to anyone in my neighborhood.

[@AMBELLINA_X]

I absolutely lost it when you did your "MAKE WAY!" impression hahaha subscribed just for that. Everything else is a bonus! You're HILARIOUS!

[@rebeccajohnson9423]

People tell me I’m not praying hard enough to be healed

[@Wheelsnoheels]

Ugh some people. :S

[@randomrainbow4479]

Mm...if you should happen to hear this again, would you consider deadpan whistling at them "If I Only Had a Brain," from The Wizard of Oz in response to their nonsense? Maybe slowly turn away before they can say anything and continue whistling the song as you casually egress? Might be fun. If you can't whistle, perhaps a recording of someone else whistling it or try using...dare I say it, a kazoo? Not knocking religion, but damn. That is a whole lot of ignorant right there.

[@JustMe-sm9bu]

Rebecca Johnson i hate that

[@EmilyCheetham]

Other than talking to people about their disabilities as I also have a hidden disability of my own I am not guilty of doing these things. It shocks me whenever people do these things. Iv seen people do things like make everyone get out the way or apologise for being run over. I I always think WHY are they acting like that. I’m. It in a wheel chair but I do have epilepsy and autism. I don’t care if people know and I’m not embarrassed by it. Iv had things said to me over the years (thankfully most I cannot remember what the exact things were) but the most annoying thing I personally get very frustrated with is when I talk to people about my epilepsy or autism and people say I shouldn’t be talking about it inline or letting people know I have these disabilities. WHY not? I’m not ashamed of my disabilities. Im making people aware and reaching out to others. Im showing i. A normal person watching the same dang videos as you. Or showing that I have similar problems to said person. Or just educating people on stuff. PLEASE people don’t tell me what I should or shouldn’t be posting. Pleas don’t tell people who have visible or invisible disabilities what they should or shouldn’t be doing.

[@richardholder8970]

Gem whenever we are out and it’s possibly very busy, people don’t see me sat in my wheelchair and I’m happy propelling along, and I always try to avoid young kids or elderly people but when people just cut across you and they may knock into me they may apologise but I’m sat in my wheelchair and feet are clear from the ground,it’s the people who are trying to walk through or get pass you, they get their feet squashed or toes rolled over and they are the ones who maybe in pain, not me they need to be aware of people who are a lot lower down than they are👨🏻‍🦽

[@patmccoy8758]

When I was participating in a political demonstration for civil rights for the disabled, one of my disabilities flared badly, my knee swelled up to twice its size, and I lost my ability to walk in the middle of the march. I was loaned a wheelchair so I could continue the march. When I went to one of the Congressional buildings to see my Representative, I struggled to get in the door. The revolving door is impossible for wheelchairs and the regular door was hard to pull open, and stay open, while trying to get the wheelchair through. Someone finally gave me a hand with the door and I rolled on in. I roll up to a staff person and asked which office my Representative is in. Staff person directs me, IN A WHEELCHAIR, to a SPIRAL STAIRCASE!!! I rolled back to the staff person and said, HELLO!! WHEELCHAIR!! How do you expect me to get to the upper floors? Staff person tried to tell me that elevators were off limits except to Congress Critters. I pointed out that I have a RIGHT to meet with my Representative regardless that I'm in a wheelchair!! Eventually, I was permitted onto the elevator. I get into my Representative's office only to get told by a staff person to go away because seeing handicapped people made him uncomfortable!! By this point, I LOST my patience AND my mouth filter and verbally went OFF on him! My Representative heard my loud mouth and came out of his Inner Sanctum to listen to what I had to say. He didn't blame me for getting mad when I described what I was forced to go through just to be able to talk to him! I think he got it. I told him the staff in his office building needs some education!!!

[@tabitas.2719]

I loved your number one because it's a common misconception and I unfortunately don't remember when it was revealed to me, but awareness definitely has to be spread!! :)

[@theamazingbiff]

Ambulatory, but I used a service dog for many years and heard SO MANY witty comments from random strangers. People's sense of entitlement never ceases to amaze me! I got a lot of the "you don't look disabled," to which my favorite comeback was "YOU don't look like a doctor!" And like you with a able-bodied companion, I had a lot of people talk to my dog when I asked them questions in businesses. He was a border collie, but even border collies aren't equipped to do taxes or home-improvement projects.

[@billm6294]

"Yes I can" well of course! :-) Another wonderful video. I must say the times I've visited the UK the people seem so polite, but of course you are talking about a small subset of the many folks you encounter. Roll on and be well.

[@Wheelsnoheels]

ah thank you. Having a tough week with pain this week so this video was fun to make and lifted my mood. 😃

[@Wheelsnoheels]

SooOooo many more stupid things people say to me, but not enough time, what have people said to you?!!! Don't forget to give me a thumbs up!! If you've enjoyed this video then feel free to buy me a drink to show your support to my channel! ko-fi.com/wheelsnoheels

[@Wheelsnoheels]

the EXACT thing happened to me 2 days ago!!!! i was so mad!

[@yourlovelynightmare1]

Oh, also, I have different anxiety disorders, depression, borderline personality disorder, and possibly more. And the question people ask my fiance a lot is "are you sure she's not faking it?" yes, I love walking into a store simply to buy groceries, and then feeling like someone put a numbing agent into my veins. I love when my thoughts get so scrambled I legitimately cannot remember what foods I enjoy. And I love crying uncontrollably literally out of the fear of crying. XD that's all just so fun, and joyous. No. I'm not faking it. Just because you went through a hormonal teenage phase when you were like 13 and thought you had anxiety and depression, doesn't mean that me, a 20 year old long time sufferer of depression will just grow out of it. Or get better. No. Just..no. x.x

[@HighTen_Melanie]

I watched this one again and must tell you I laughed so much I nearly fell out of my chair. I can relate to all of them but the way you tell them is utterly hilarious. All your videos are great but this one is my absolute favourite!

[@gracer503]

My dads mum, after her stroke, and sister, MS, were both in wheelchairs, so being raised my brother and I were taught to give way without making a big deal out of it, and to never stare. Obviously it's common courtesy, but people really don't understand that a wheelchair has a person in it that has feelings and a voice to be heard.

[@LanaRay-ie7fc]

As soon as I saw the title of this video, I thought of how I have heard “You’re too pretty to be in a wheelchair-“ and yep, it was on your list! I enjoyed your humorous commentary. I’ve had most of these things happen. Got a big kick out of your CLEAR description of what it is like on sloped terrain-ONE HUGE ARM 😅gave me good chuckle. Of course, soon enough, there is a slope in the opposite direction to balance out the other arm ha ha ha.

[@pixie_foxarts]

I'm not disabled, but I have severe athsma, and it ticks me off to no end when, I'm in class and for some reason I need to use my inhaler, so i go to the medicine cupboard we have in the class and i get it out of the basket and i use it and everyone just goes 'OMIGOSH, ARE YOU OK?!' and I just go : 'yea why???' and they automatically assume, that, because I'm using my inhaler, I'm having an athsma attack. I kid u not, that's what almost everyone in my class thinks. I want to slap some sense into them so badly u have no idea.

[@patmccoy8758]

My Voc. Rehab. Counselor started screaming hysterically when they saw my rescue inhaler in my hand! That was NUTS!!