Where I've Been

[@TokidokiTraveller]

Man reading your comments made me tear up! Thank you for sharing your stories and being so kind ❤️ also I wanted to mention that I do see a therapist and have been going regularly for 3 years! She’s helped me figure a LOT of stuff out and has been great for me. Wishing you guys so much luck on your own journeys ❤️

[@pfteve]

We in this together, fren.

[@mrboo2983]

I wish the absolute best for you as you deserve it! Well done on consistant therapy and never give up

[@ueel2577]

It sucks to be sad and it's so much part of the human journey, at least for some of us. What is hard is trying to put a smiley face on top of a sad one. Love those long shots you have of traffic going over the bridges, it's such a japanese movie moment, capturing the daily experience of life just living on

[@lncompetentGaming]

So glad you’re feeling much better 🥰

[@helloprole1053]

going through the same shit man, thanks for sharing. it's cliche lol but you're inspiring me!!

[@user-vj4nc6ng6l]

“What a blessed life... God I’m depressed” MOOOOOOD. Also this pandemic has not helped anyone’s state of mental health. I’m not sure what may help you but what I personally do when I’m in that mood is just ride the wave. Cry if you need to (seriously crying helps to yeet the emotions from your body), take a hot shower, eat comfort food, stretch and take deep breaths, drink lots of water, and take lots of nature walks. I love to watch your channel and you’re always so funny and creative! Hope things are able to start looking up soon :)

[@thomasinajefferson9971]

Yeet the emotions 😂🏆

[@Yoyocreative]

That part was so hard to watch for me! I reacted exactly like that when I was in deep, deep depression! I'm glad to see she's doing a bit better!

[@Khwerz]

It's helped me a lot. I Used to have an atrocious mental state. I turned off. Played games which seems the only way I know to get out of my own head and move on from my actions.

[@LaNoir.]

It helped me cause I don't like to meet people xD

[@Differentiation]

She back! And she going through some stuff. Honestly, identifying cycles before they begin again is the first step of regaining your own power.

[@GliderZero555]

How do you even do this, that would be so fantastic if I could

[@rinciel4999]

@@GliderZero555 Everyone's process is different. But most importantly I think YOU can do it. 💪

[@Differentiation]

@@GliderZero555 It is not easy. It's painful and it's hard and it's often accompanied with feelings of despair. But you can do it and you can get through it.

[@momomiyya]

On a completely different note: your outfits and make-up looks are on fire 🔥

[@AndrewFriedberg]

Videos like these de-stigmatize emotional distress and help people to feel less alone and weird about their own traumas. Takes courage, takes sincerity. Good onya (apologies for possible misuse of slang)

[@TokidokiTraveller]

Thank you! It was really hard to press the publish button and I debated it a lot but I’m glad I did!

[@slax4884]

@@TokidokiTraveller it helped a lot of people that you did:)

[@ordinaryaverageguy76]

@@TokidokiTraveller Thank you for hitting that button. I've not seen much of your channel for a while (damn the YT algorithm) and I appreciate this sort-of catching-up a bit content. The artists I've come to appreciate most are those who are kinda transparent - not faking the "up" mode. Wish I had wise words of advice, but I don't, only a virtual hug for you on your journey of Emma-discovery. Be kind to yourself.

[@Lisa-gq7qh]

So true!

[@LaNoir.]

feeling so-so about it. It helps to see that others feel the same, but the world also looks so much more depressing xD

[@Stryke777]

Thank you sincerly for sharing.

[@haku_puzzle6862]

Hey I hope you’re feeling better don't worry you’re not alone and even if you’re feeling sad somedays remember that eventually it’ll go better and you'll be happier.

[@TokidokiTraveller]

When I think about past things I went through, I can remember it hurting but I don’t feel that exact pain anymore. So I know that one day I can look back at now and feel the same. Every day is a step in the right direction

[@thomasinajefferson9971]

@@TokidokiTraveller Well that just made me realize some things about myself. Oof.

[@rustyshackleford6633]

@@TokidokiTraveller When I think about things that happened a long time ago, I still feel the same pain I felt back then even f I know its something that shouldnt matter anymore.

[@knawdlimbz2212]

Hope this msg gets to you. Thank you for sharing. I've been a fan since the video you did with your friend at the Japanese Love Hotels... And since then, I've been a fan. I just wanted to thank you, you may not think it, but your Videos have been therapeutic for me, I have some health issues, and I'm getting them addressed. I have been dealing with severe depression and anxiety as well as having other health issues that have been adding up... It's been hard NOT knowing whats causing panic attacks, and bouts with feeling alone, and almost like your in a body that is NO longer YOUR body. It's like I'm a passenger in my own body, and I've given the negativity the wheel... And Now it's driving us off a cliff ,until it gives me the control again. The point is , stay strong. Stay amazing, Because you are... Your a very unique soul, and because you have these traits, you are , will Always have a leg up on those who don't have the strength, the drive, the heart and soul... To get back on your feet... Your amazing. Thank you for everything you do .. I wish you luck on your journey called life. Keep your head up, keep kicking ass, and I'll be there supporting you and your channel as long as your still doing this.. your friend ... Tim

[@leafcerulean92]

"god I'm depressed...." *bursts out laughing* relatable.

[@ahmedk8612]

this is what's called madness or the point of start to lose your mind.

[@USMarshmallow]

Sometimes, all you really can do is laugh at how depressed you feel. When everything around you looks wonderful, but you can't feel it. All you can do is laugh at the irony of it all. It really is relatable.

[@yoongified93]

Hey Emma! I feel you so much, right now I'm in this very stressing point of my life (25 here) in which I feel like i should have more inplace than I do. Also learning to let go of certain persons and focusing on myself has been a very tough process, I will always be glad to watch your videos that you decide to put up for us. Hope you're better!

[@foomp]

As a 37yo and know many others that are older and younger, I can say with confidence that there's no real reason to overstress yourself about your direction in life. Spend some time thinking about what it is you want. Do your best to narrow things down as much as possible if you have thoughts going all over the place. Failures in broader perspectives are usually unavoidable, which is something people don't really get until they actually do something, so understand that dwelling on them without a productive outlook isn't going to help anyone. Find the (broad) direction you want to go and just do it. Start small if you want to (get an entry level job) and work from there. Be productive. Try new things if you want to. Just don't delude yourself into thinking things will happen without you doing anything meaningful to make it happen. I know someone who is nothing but positive, but is far too lazy as a result because of that false positivity that things will just work out without the need to even try. Finds every little excuse to grasp onto his belief that he can just do nothing and then lose hundreds of pounds and find a 6-figure job (has no job currently and no work experience). Thinks eating a few bites of lettuce, while eating nearly 5000 calories of junk food, is huge progress. It's pretty terrible.

[@yoongified93]

@@foomp thank you for this! I am in the process of trying to balance my life out just for the sake of a better future. I'm studying, learning, reading, exercising and making sure I am in touch with my friends and loved ones. After being at my lowest, I think the best I can do is be kind to my current self and work so my future self is proud and can have it easier.

[@biteofdog]

@@yoongified93 " I think the best I can do is be kind to my current self" I agree with this, you are taking the right step, I just wish I was kinder to myself in my 20's and learned to set more boundaries sooner with people in my life. Now I'm in my late 30's and I'm still figuring things out, I've had failures in the past few years in my career ambition (in what I thought was what I wanted) but now I'm free of that and focusing on starting my own business (I'm tired of dealing with bosses). As you get older you will naturally feel more comfortable with yourself because of all the experiences and lessons you have. I wish you luck, and if you are really having a difficult time therapy is a great way to take care of yourself.

[@gentronseven]

You don't even have to work towards or care about anything if you don't want to. It's your life just do whatever you want because it's not as long as you think it is.

[@georgianasstudio]

I’m 53 and still learning about myself. So glad you are living in a world where therapy is now acceptable and you have good support xxx

[@whend.licious8525]

I think your vids are great! hair looks fab too 😊

[@butterflymuse2707]

Your red hair is 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥! Sending big hugs and healing vibes to you! Congrats to you, though, for realizing and breaking the cycle and taking steps to be the best Emma you can be! ❤

[@TokidokiTraveller]

WAH THANK YOU I felt that so much in my heart I really appreciate you ❤️

[@butterflymuse2707]

@@TokidokiTraveller I appreciate you too! :) Always be unapologetically you, Emma, and hang in there. You got this!

[@mushroomlena]

Also learning that those breakdowns are a part of growing as a human. It’s freaking messy and hard. As a kid I imagined adulthood would be like leveling up and up, but it’s more like a roller coaster with sometimes really low downs.

[@DavidAndDannyShow]

I also had a breakdown since you last up loaeded, I was sectioned on a psych ward for 3 weeks. Everyday is a step in the right direction no matter what happens

[@kamatmehbro]

stay strong brother. Reach out if you ever want to talk

[@TokidokiTraveller]

That’s a great mindset to have, you’ve got this ❤️

[@micheles5431]

i like your new hair colour emma. keep up the positive attitude. Just know that we are all here listening and relating.

[@karlos1008]

I’m 30. I’m basically going through this same process. I reckon everyone goes through this at some point, whether they realise it or not. Keep your head up. Hope to see your next video real soon and keen for your next stream! :)

[@human_maybe6690]

Thank you so much for sharing ❤ I'm working on my journey too! We got this!

[@golddust872]

Well, a positive is your hair looks fabulous. As someone who has been down that awful depression road a few times, and pulled herself out of it, always look for a positive. Everyday I find one thing that makes me smile, no matter what it is. And, for me, being proactive about things on my find. Fixing what I can, when I can, and learning when to just let things go (easier said than done). But, Padre Pio said it best, "pray, hope, and don't worry."

[@karatecat46]

Gosh, I can relate too much. It was a blessing to hear from you. Sending happy vibes. And your hair looks gorgeous!

[@cecilekiddo5185]

“What a blessed life… God I’m depressed” is the most relatable sentence ever…. Went through a pretty big depressive period few years ago, it was not fun to work through all my stuff, but I can say that today I’m feeling pretty good most of the time…even with all the virus things happening. So chin up Emma!!! You’ll get through this! It’s gonna be tiring, sometimes really hard, but it’s always worth it!!! Thank you for sharing this with us, and always be so real on your channel!

[@jaimyw.8842]

Thank you for talking about your journey! Wishing you all the best along the way. I'm praying for you!

[@MicheMunro]

Hi Emma, I'm 29 and I'm having an extremely similar time in my life. Realising that patterns of behaviour are rooted in my traumas, and finding that it's overwhelming, the concept of healing myself into self-love. It's all daunting but it's the journey, isn't it! Sending best wishes and sincerely hope that we both flourish.

[@watsonlj]

Thanks for openness! You are one of my favourite KZbinrs my thoughts are with you and PS love the hair!

[@gregcromie9939]

From a fellow Aussie - You're a bloody champion. Hang in their kiddo!

[@bradbailey3235]

Best wishes for you on your journey.

[@phlebotnum]

My mom warned me basically my whole life that turning 25 was going to be a big life stage shift and learning/breakdown space, and low and behold, SHE WAS SO RIGHGT! I had a major shift in life practices, goals, habits, and self understanding between about 25-26 and it was ROUGH. Girl, I completely see you having this transition and I just want you to know that it's tumultuous and dramatic and super hard day-to-day, but you WILL get through it and come out the other end knowing so much more about yourself, your journey, and how you want to live. Good luck as you weather this transitional time and know that the people around you who love you and and stick around through it are the ones who will see you through other transitions later on (hell, I'm 38 and still learning stuff about myself every year!). You are immensely talented and introspective, so just remember to think about what you need to change while also making a point to think about what you are already good at and can strengthen.

[@dogables]

That happened to me too.

[@natalyrausch]

25-27 was really hard for me too. I had relied on co-dependent behaviors to bring me happiness, and when that wasn't there anymore, I had to create a new way to cope. It's hard, but worth it to change. Change will happen anyway, just make sure it's positive and worth your time. :)

[@miri_miri_chan]

I started this turning point at 25 and I'm 30 and still figuring things out. Will it ever stop, dunno but now I'm in therapy which is good

[@jadduck]

I turn 26 next week and, man, your mom is right

[@rpie1382]

Damn I’m around that age group and am going through a transitional phase that has been very rough.. respect your elders they know what they are talking about…

[@sm-rz7jp]

You're awesome and brave and real and just fabulous. Keep taking care of you! We'll be here when you're ready, but you comes first! 🌱🌻

[@pfteve]

Sometimes the hardest expectations to live up to, are our own.

[@pete1503]

God I felt this! I’ve been (am still) where you are! Thankyou for sharing this part of your journey, you’re amazing 💙

[@nataliewebber3139]

"what a blessed life. ....................... god im depressed." *manic laughter* Yeah, been there girl. Hang in there. I'll always watch your videos and support you in anyway I can

[@carlosscampos314]

OMG that hair is beautiful!!! Breakdowns are sad and hard, but it can be transformed into something a bit more positive if we can take something from them that makes us move forward and into a better place!

[@sethusk]

Hey Emma, I know you touched on this a bit during your streams, but I'm glad to see you are working through things. I had a trauma point from childhood that I basically crushed deep down for several decades until I had a breakdown myself. I think the most interesting thing during recovery was how emotionally ignorant I was about myself. It's like the basic of basics they were teaching me during therapy and I didn't know any of it. It felt like learning a foreign language and I really wondered why no one had taught me this stuff growing up. Anyway, really happy for you. Working on that stuff sucks, but is definitely worth it, as I'm sure you already know. I'll just join in with the "you're not alone" people who feel the same! Good luck on your journey.

[@amara560]

Your comment is so relatable. I literally had to (re-)learn how to feel my feelings. Felt so bizarre to be missing such a basic staple of emotion regulation.

[@lilaskys]

Perfect timeing 😅 I had a breakdown today too. This video kind of help a little today. Thanks and lot's of love to you too,

[@xalanii]

The whole period of my mid 20s to early 30s was just constant fear of getting left behind, not doing things in the proper order. But...then again you get older and just don't give a shit and do thing on your own timeline.

[@thesillyhatday]

Thats good to hear, as I'm 29 and feel left behind.

[@GauravSingh-ku5xy]

@@thesillyhatday If you don't mind, what exactly is it that you feel left behind in?

[@Alertse]

Yup 34 and feel like have done so much and yet nothing at the same time ...didn't do any of the traditional things like marriage kids house etc but I have travelled a lot....but sometimes feels like whoops I'm really behind people my age

[@conradf2747]

I needed this video. Thanks for posting. I’ve been processing some stuff too. The willingness to process is often half the battle. “Keep your stick on the ice.”

[@rachelmaggi7266]

I just turned 26 and over the last year I've finally started learning and accepting things about myself that I think I've always, in some part, known but found too depressing to truly acknowledge. It's always easier to pretend you're fine and normal until it eats too much of yourself away. So I think it's really brave of you to not only acknowledge this thing and the cycle you find yourself in, but commit to doing something about it! That's really amazing! I'm wishing you all the happiness and growth in the future.

[@afsanahossainimu3500]

Hey Emma, i have been following you on KZbin like forever. I saw how much u grown as a person and also in everything. And it helped me in many way too. Inspired me. Seeing you sad today made me sad too. But it's okay Emma. Don't worry, like will get better. Everything will be alright. Hope you see this comment. Wish you all the best in life from the bottom of my heart. I was worried why you weren't uploading videos. Love your hair btw. Really suits you 🧡

[@jellewils3974]

Being alone means getting confronted with ourselves eventually, which isn't easy but can be a healing experience if we're willing to face our fears, allow grief for past trauma (Yes, your hurt is real!) and turn past anger into healthy boundaries. Also, the whole process is quite fascinating and helpful for further developing personal emotional intelligence.

[@ashleybarker8121]

Thank you for sharing and I hope you feel better soon 🥰 on another note ! You look amazing, not that you didn't before, but you're really looking amazing !

[@audreymills4845]

"I want to live in ignorance bliss but that's unhealthy" OH MAN I FELT THAT ONE. You made the right first step in figuring out patterns, now you have to do the grueling work of working them out. I wish you the best and you got this! Also, damn girl, your hair is FIRE.

[@gimmemoremusic]

We love you, Emma! My twenties were mostly like that and phew, what a relief and joy it is when you're past depression! You'll get there!

[@abrunosrq]

You’ve brought so much joy to others and I hope we random strangers of the internet can return the favor. But whenever you’re ready. No pressure. Big virtual hugs 🤗 And, girl, that red hair is 🔥!!

[@marisamarie1837]

How awesome that you are being brave to take care of your mental health and dealing with tough issues so that you can heal and come out a healthier version of you. I can't support this journey enough and can totally empathize knowing I went through something very similar in my 30s. I also want to add that you looked absolutely gorgeous being real and vulnerable and every outfit was beautiful and dang that hair color is fire!! It fits you so well and looks like you were born with that color.

[@brendanfarthing]

Great video, thanks so much for sharing! It is indeed valuable for others to hear this kind of thing. Onwards and upwards for you. G'day from a lovely lockdown in Sydney!

[@r00k917]

Just the fact you are sharing this journey means a lot to people dealing with the same stuff. It never gets easy but we get stronger each time we get through it.

[@jojorosey]

I personally enjoy these videos that people can connect with, understand, and realize they're not alone. BTW, digging the hair!

[@casg3m]

The pandemic hasn't been kind to anyone but it's been even more trying for people with depression. You're super relatable and you're not alone. Also, you are killing it with the red. Such a fox.

[@1152pm]

This past 1.5 year has been perfect for breakdowns indeed. Good luck on your journey Emma! love the fitss

[@gwynnmccallan8856]

Sounds more like a break through than a break down. Life is just one long journey with your best friend...you. And the red hair looks great on you!

[@invaderbacca]

You're super well at being vague but also sharing? Happy you're back. Stay healthy and you do you.

[@Vlidery13]

3 minutes in and I'm like: 'Hey this has been me for like the past 3 years.' sad, empty, numb, trying to do things that normally make me happy and then realising it doesn't make me happy and then being sad again. (I need a new job lol)

[@kellynguyen353]

Yes self healing!!!! Take as much time as you need and I CAN wait for your apartment tour!

[@Ferncovered]

I'm 32, and just went through the biggest life shift over 2020, and I'm now on the other side feeling whole and happy. Every step, every day is important and every ounce of work we do is important. I hope you get to your other side soon too, even if another bump pops up after, I hope you keep getting to your other sides. Your videos helped me through my rough patch, I'll often go back and re-watch old ones because your voice feels soothing in the background while I'm working. If you have given me this gift, I hope I can give you one back in the form of supporting your work and your journey. Thank you, so much! No matter what comes, I'll be a supporter of your channel in all the ways I can!

[@Differentiation]

I just want to say... yea. This.

[@Keepingitreal123]

I have micro breakdown after every work shift so I totally feel you! Feel better!!!!!

[@cactustactics]

Emma, you're always such a genuine, positive and all-round cool human being. I really appreciate you sharing this side of stuff, especially when it feels so personal - I'd like to think that being comfortable about showing it means you know you got this! I'm sending you all the vibes mate Also the hair is awesome, and that colour with the eyeshadow is just chef kiss

[@joshuaashe7553]

Sending prayers and warm wishes your way! Keep fighting the good fight. Glad to see you back!

[@islabotty]

As someone who is also going through a time and stuff like this, it's nice to know I'm not alone

[@TokidokiTraveller]

Definitely not alone! This stuff can be so essential for growth but it’s awful to go through 😭 I hope yours gets better and better!

[@islabotty]

@@TokidokiTraveller I'm trying my best❤ (p.s. a long time ago in a livestream you said everyone should try and see therapist just to see if they liked it, so I it gave me the confidence to do so, and its helped alot so thanks for that too I guess lol)

[@Dyundu]

For all of us going through stuff right now, it's important to remember that none of us are truly alone. Take care all.

[@funstick569]

I related a lot to this video and you put into words what I can’t. Thank you for sharing, you’re a star Emma!

[@HeadlessClient]

A few points: 1) The hair looks great! 2) Unsolicited anecdote: I went through a similar event that came to a boiling point in 2019. It caused me to make some drastic and sweeping changes. It was terrifying, lonely, and exhausting, but totally worth it in the end. I'm happier now than I've ever been in my life even though I still feel tremors of some past events, but they're getting a lot easier to iron out now. 3) I'm glad you're doing well and look forward to seeing where you go from here (even if it ultimately is the end of your vlogging pressence.) Genuinely wishing you the best, Emma. Never stop looking forward.

[@amberthest]

2019 was quite a time to make big life decisions just in time for 2020 😅 right there with ya though

[@0wliin]

Your hair looks amazing! Take your time with healing and moving forward, you have to do it at your pace. Don't rush for anyone/anything. Take care, we love you

[@myownbravado]

This is definitely very relatable and something that I agree a lot of us are going through right now. There's been a lot of time, maybe too much time, to think about ourselves and the past lately, and it's definitely done both bad and good for me. I'm still trying to figure it all out, but it's comforting to know that so many people are going through the same. Sending you the best vibes Emma and everyone else going through it

[@tylerdrummond4078]

I relate to this too hard, going through something similar. Thanks for sharing, and all the best on your journey!

[@ob1quixote]

I'm just a stranger on the Internet thousands of miles away, but I think you're great. I'm sorry for your troubles.

[@Tizdizwiz]

Oh lord I have never identified more with you than your moment staring around you in comtemplation and saying "what a blessed life.. I'm so depressed!" and bursting into laughter. Me too hun. Me too hun.

[@xqueenofspadesx93]

DAAAMMMN THAT RED HAIR IS 🔥🔥🔥🔥 Emma gurl you are fine 👏👏 you are stunning!

[@TokidokiTraveller]

Omg thank you! ❤️

[@xqueenofspadesx93]

@@TokidokiTraveller you're welcome! I can't wait till you feel better 😊

[@karthic1765]

I so relate to the part where you talked about being comfortable in the loop of hurting yourself to the point where you forget that you could come of out it.

[@sfoxhound]

dude, the fact they came up and you dealt with those feelings whwn you realised them was amazingly brave, coragous and a massive win/,investment for future you. and to do that in a country renound for "just be more happy" is testimate to your stregnth and tenasity.

[@Pazx]

this is heartfelt and touching. i hope things get easier for you, and thank you for sharing

[@berrykage]

I’m glad you took a break. It’s good for you. Now you’re ✨ g l o w i n g ✨ Your hair looks amazing btw ❤️

[@TimeParadog]

Thanks for sharing this. I've hit a super weird point in my life myself where I've started to connect dots going backwards to something traumatic that happened to me and figuring out how that correlates to how I act around certain triggers or moods I end up in. It's helpful to know other people go through similar garbage sometimes. Thanks again for the video and being open about this stuff. I hope you have a nice week. :)

[@606Jelly]

Those riverside visuals of the trains and cars, with that weird town bell music really capture *that* feeling. All the best to you, Emma. Transitions are fucking hard. On the plus side, guitar oven sounds keen to offer support ;)

[@tracyscott2887]

Your honesty with your mental health is super super helpful to me and probably others whom have struggled with depression. I get what you’re saying: I haven’t felt real joy in years but I’ve had a few changes where there is hope. I’m in the middle of the journey too…

[@NozoASMR]

You know, ive had the same depression and anxiety building over the last year and...the funk is real. The breakdown is real. We all have to find ourselves and figure out who we are. Not who we were. You are not alone. I dont know what's going on of course but facing the breakdown is a win. Don't forget that. 💜

[@doogelyjim8627]

wishing you happiness and strength

[@mlsmrz]

Emma, ​​thank you for sharing this learning journey with us. As someone who is trying to figure out how to react to certain things in life, this helps a lot. Hopefully you have peace knowing that you are doing what is necessary.

[@jakerigby9736]

Thank you for sharing your story Emma! Really hope you feel better soon. It is so important to tackle these issues head on, you are an inspiration to us all.

[@eirikp.3588]

Emma you'll get through this I know you will. When ever I'm feeling down I just put on one of your videos and the lovely tone to them always makes me feel so much better. I wish I had videos for you to watch and make you feel better. PS one the new hair colour very beautiful and love the black dress with those knife earrings you look amazing !!!!

[@Muffy.from-Oz]

Blessings Emma. Stay strong you bring us so much joy. Cheers Muffy from Oz (Australia) xxxx

[@swsarah]

I had a break down 2 months ago. Had to grieve the loss and all the messy stages, but I'm slowly reaching acceptance of the changes in my life. I hope your friends are supporting you, and know your internet family cares too! Much love! 🤗

[@JordanlMaximiliano]

All our love to you too!!!! Greetings from Brazil, Glad you're ok

[@tccandler]

What I have always found helpful is to bottle up my emotions and bury them deep inside my soul... so deep that I can pile all sorts of distractions on top. Then I just keep piling on more and more and more until I have forgotten what is truly important to me and I can just continue focusing on the trivial nothings that will ultimately lead to my untimely demise. That is chapter one of my self help guide. Stay tuned for more later!

[@tccandler]

Chapter 2: Ignore the problem... it will go away.

[@tccandler]

Chapter 3: What's that old saying... "Denial is the Best Medicine."

[@tccandler]

Chapter 4: Fixed.

[@IAmBlackRosee]

@@tccandler hide the problems with self deprecating humour, don't forget about that

[@GrimReaper-ii6qd]

yeaaa thats not healthy at all just speaking from my experience but best of luck.

[@TsunamiKitten56]

Videos like these make me feel less alone. They make me feel like my feelings matter. Thank you ❤️

[@MsTrain69]

Storms make trees take deeper roots ~ Dolly Parton Don’t worry, Emma. This too shall pass and you’ll be stronger for it. ♥️✝️

[@Catssonova]

Emma, thanks for being so open! I can relate so much to having previous problems that have affected me and caused depression. I'm really glad to feel like I'm not the only person who deals with this! I love your hair!

[@Wyrdwad]

My rule of thumb is, when someone is going through stuff but won't specify what that stuff is, I always come up with ideas of what they're going through, assume I'm correct, and respond accordingly. So on that note, I'm so sorry to hear that you adopted a stray gecko, named it Hildebrande, and fashioned a jacket for it out of 10,000-yen bills, only for Hildebrande to escape into the sewers and take roughly 500,000 yen with it (it was a VERY thick jacket!). It's quite unfortunate, too, that you decided to chase Hildebrande into the sewers in vain, only to encounter the nomadic Chikabaka people living beneath your feet, whom you were content to live with briefly until they force-fed you large quantities of dairy. You made your escape in the dead of night, but emerged in Sapporo somehow (the sewer system is a surprisingly convenient shortcut!) and had to hitchhike your way back, with each driver being progressively more implausible than the last, from a circus strongman to an actual baby (wired into an advanced AI). Worst of all, I'm sorry you forgot to film any of this, and also pledged a vow to the last hitchhiker that you would speak of none of this on camera for perpetuity... in exchange for your 500,000 yen back (turns out Hildebrande was actually her pet, though its real name was Hildevrande... you were SO CLOSE!). It's quite an incredible story, though. Too bad you aren't able to tell it. ...In all seriousness, whatever happened, I'm glad you were able to find out a bit more about yourself, and I hope you know that we all appreciate you and want the best for you. Few of us know you personally, of course, but we feel like we know you from your outstanding videos, and we definitely appreciate you for being you. Best of luck with the continued self-discovery, and do whatever you gotta do to find your happiness again!

[@marljusweety]

So happy I decided to read this whole thing. Amazing!

[@haidanhaikaz1582]

You sound like such a wonderful human being, bless you!

[@missAUDACITY]

This is the best thing I’ve read this week. Motion for this to be the official reason!

[@stephmillano]

Beautiful

[@AyakoSapphirePhoenix]

hildevrande killed me 😂😂

[@kenfrog03]

I only recently discovered your channel, and have been thoroughly enjoying all of your content. I'm so sorry to hear of your troubles, but the struggle will get easier, and you will only be better for it! Just know you have a lot of people sending good vibes your way!

[@BigGreenRapist]

Such a kiwi and Australian thing to make humour out of shitty situations, you’ll get there Emma! Sending love from across the ditch 🇳🇿🇦🇺

[@kellimayor4580]

I feel you! I'm about to turn thirty, in my last few semester's of college, no love life and living at home with family. The struggle sometimes. just think you have over came every single bad day thus far. You are killing it. You are so funny, down to earth and very relatable. A fan for life here. :)

[@johnyinnit]

Take care Emma - your comedic stuff is hilarious and you deserve all the happiness

[@bluedutchess6656]

Good luck with your journey! :) I'm also on a journey to break my own "known" cycles, it's hard but not impossible. Recognizing there is one (or more) is a great step! Also sharing a bit of my positive energy with you

[@harrycrumb40]

I don’t really use the word “recovery” because mental health is a roller coaster. It’s about learning what works and building a tool kit. Boundaries are also really important. Take care lovely lady☺️

[@lizawithaz9524]

Hey Emma, firstly thanks for sharing your feelings so candidly. Externalising and/or addressing your issue/s is a great step forward to unravelling pent up anxiety etc. Recognising and being insightful about what triggers your bouts of depression is (ironically) positive. I agree, Life's a journey - a continual rollercoaster of emotions. It can be scary, sometimes lonely, but also truly wonderful. Reaching out to someone you can trust whether it be a friend or a professional is key. Be gentle on yourself x

[@JayColor]

As someone who has struggled with depression for a long time, I know enough to know that no one knows how you feel but you. But we're pulling for you, and I hope you find some of the same joy that your channel brings to so many others.

[@dmore]

Hair looks great. All the best with your stuff. Look forward to the flat tour :)

[@Evo2Infallibility]

There is nothing more complicated than dealing with feelings of depression. However, one thing I will say is I really look forward to your videos. I'm sure there are more people here that feel the same but you brighten my day with your content.

[@ToliBera]

good luck on your path to wellness, it's going to have a lot of peaks and valleys but you'll get there one step at a time. *Cheering you on*

[@jarshaarashi]

I hope everything is okay ❤ it seems so easy to bottle everything up, but the bottle is only so big so eventually stuff comes out. Usually at the worst time too. I can sympathize with how you feel, the past few years have been very hard for me. I've just been trying to plug away every day and hope that things will get better.

[@gilberado]

Thank you for sharing up and downs. I hope you will feel better and remember that you will overcome it.

[@fnkyfreak]

I like the fact that you are so openly honest about what is going on in your mind, many of us hate to admit it and even refuse to deal with it until it destroys everything. It is amazing that whatever is going on in your life has not negatively impacted your creativity. Your video was so beautifully shot, framed, narrated and edited that it would have no difficulty being part of an art house exhibition at a gallery. No matter where you are in your journey your viewers are here for you. I look forward to your next video as always. Tc.