Who is the nanny?! // Malaysia 2023 Episode 3

[@freakishuproar1168]

That whole "why take a baby/small child abroad" argument people make is so stupid. Rupert doesn't have to remember the intricacies of a foreign culture or have any real understanding of where he is or what he's doing, he's still a baby! All of this exposure to different people and things is about helping his emotional development and socializing skills, giving him important lessons in how to (temporarily) adapt to anything out of routine or within his understanding, and that it's okay, because whatever is happening his mums are there experiencing it with him. Obviously you don't have to travel to a foreign country to give a child that experience, but I don't see why anyone shouldn't.

[@chuchu9649]

The difference here is that Rupert and their mom have heritage ties to the region, whereas most tourist parents are entirely foreign (usually white). This is a good cultural experience for Rupert and their family but tourism like this is usually exploitative of the local economy when done by foreigners. Point is, taking a baby on vacation isn't wrong but taking advantage of foreign cultures to have an extractive experience is. Learn more about this topic by reading about socialism 😄

[@NZKiwi87]

And also, what would people have them do, leave Rupert on the front step until they get back? Of course they all go together, they’re family 🤷‍♀️

[@GoingtoHecq]

Some people don't want children in their lives even if they have them. Thankfully Jessica and Claudia love their son.

[@mommingpursuit]

It makes so much more sense when it’s to see family as well!

[@mommingpursuit]

The rapid development is also exhausting because we are constantly reassessing how we care for them and keep them safe as they explore their new skills and push limitations!

[@ma-ri-ko]

my mom is hard of hearing and obviously i don't remember being rupert's age, but mom does have a story she likes to tell about how i figured out that she was reading lips while i was still in diapers and i made a game of covering my mouth and talking while she was changing me one time. i wouldn't rule it out that ru is trying to make sure that y'all can hear him 😂

[@milesdelatorre3001]

I’m a coda and yeah accosting my mom by putting my face right in front of hers is a way to communicate!

[@tiadeets]

That's a good reminder about special assistance. I usually don't ask it in advance and just ask them at the airport to skip the queue to board the plane (only intra-European flights so far), but for longer trips outside of the EU, I'll definitely make sure to ask because standing for 1h in a queue sounds like hell!

[@wildscotsman1]

I always advance book for assistance for my disabled wife and it does help tremendously with making our flights as stress free as possible.

[@asympti2185]

I was glad at least to see that most of the people in that line were masked. There surely were people in the line who were immunosuppressed to one degree or another, and anything to reduce their exposure in such a crowded space!

[@logo9470]

Haha “Oh yeah that’s George” 😳 I cried laughing. Your resort is gorgeous. Rupert is just talking up a storm. It is so adorable to hear and the clip with him in the chef’s hat! 🥰 🥰 I’m in love!

[@IndigoFalls1212]

Love your perspective on the importance of creating memories for all the aspects of our kids’ heritage. ‘Stepping stones of memory’ is brilliant! My spouse and I were fortunate to be able to do the same on an extended travel/living abroad adventure for our child when he was a toddler. He’s a teen now and those heritage-linked memories and experiences are definitely a part of him.

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

Oh absolutely! ❤️

[@Satopi3104]

Just to let you know, at 34:25, you can see about half of Rupert’s face. It’s a flash and only half his face, so it might be intentional you didn’t blur it, but just in case it wasn’t, I thought you might want to know. Sorry to point it out in such a public forum, but I don’t do other social media and this was the only way.

[@narnigrin]

11:00 Rupert being all adorable and encouraging towards the man like, "He did it!" I can't take it 😭😍

[@wheelie26]

That is a gorgeous room and resort. You are very lucky to have these opportunities and how lovely to go with Claudia’s dad. It’s great for children to have lots if different experiences early on, if you continue then he will be open to new things as he grows up. Rupert’s little bracelet is beautiful.

[@kellyfields3061]

George seems nice he just wanted Claudia to be his friend. Glad you had a good birthday Jessica.

[@babablacksheepdog]

Uhhh, to be honest if I saw George coming my way trying to be my friend I would start climbing the nearest palm tree.

[@kellyfields3061]

@@babablacksheepdog That's fair.

[@Robb3636]

I would be thrilled to make friends with George! To be fair, I am also a big reptile enthusiast

[@jgardner4699]

You explained it so well, also he will enjoy seeing those photos as he gets older, meeting family, and im sure its very healing/meaningful for claudia to see him exploring Malaysia almost like a full circle moment

[@wheelie26]

JESSICA check at 34.26 bottom left corner. You need to blur R out.

[@Princess18505]

engaging for them to see this!!

[@anitadhm_]

commenting to boost💕

[@honorcollins6962]

How wonderful it is for you to be able to take Rupert to Malaysia at such a crucial time in his development! I’m sure he’ll remember little snapshots! Was there a reason you titled the video “who’s the nanny?” because I was wondering what that meant the whole video!

[@Quintinia]

I was wondering the same thing, maybe it was meant to be the title for next week's video about travelling as an LGBTQ family?

[@laurengallagher5137]

Yes I was also wondering about the title! But maybe they’re referring to Claud’s dad, watching Rupert while they have some couple time? 🤷‍♀️

[@AsDfaaaasssssdafffffffff]

Yes I was also wondering about this!

[@laurakeller1080]

she didn't directly mention it however they do talk about Claudia's dad watching Rupert when he's sleeping so that may be it

[@theresekennedy6320]

These vlogs are absolutely gorgeous and create such amazing content. I have Fibromyalgia and the tiredness from travel is completely exhausting and of course I look fine so it can be hard to be understood which only adds to the frustration! I love that you share the good days and the bad ones too. It would be very easy to show everything as being perfect. I really appreciate that you share and explain the tough times 🥰🇮🇪

[@jennifers5560]

What a fabulous resort! Even though it is physically tiring, I hope that you were both able to refill your souls and minds by getting away. (Smart move bringing Granddad!) 😉

[@lumKyo]

Every time I watch your family videos I just wanna be adopted by you guys, honestly (a biracial 32yo with the background of emotional abuse and bullying by her own family here). I just wish I can be a positive adult figure in someone's life eventually AND be reborn in a family like yours. Thank you so much for sharing these precious moments with us. Love and hugs!

[@electriclllady]

It is important and totally worthwhile to take him on trips like this! Also the first 5 years of development develops neurological pathways at an incredible rate - 1 million a second!!! So the more nourished with stimulation your child is and the more nourished with love they are the better! It's honestly about including him in the family and getting him to experience love and engagement and positive interaction with his culture. Children do remember a whole lot more from this age and as babies than people recognise- he will remember this, but regardless, he is bonding with his family, you and Claudia as well as the rest of his family and that's more important than anything ❤

[@Katherine-ds2ft]

Standing for an hour and a half! My goodness Jessica. I'm just thinking how hard that would be to recover from. So sorry you had to experience that ❤️

[@laurame5659]

Currently trying to finish my Master Thesis and freakig out slightly about the steadely aproaching deadline. Also, the weather is Not helping my mood. But watching your lovley travel vlogs und enjoying your sunshine is really helping me not get lost to much in my own head. Thank your taking us along on your your adventures

[@jennifers5560]

Good luck! You can do it!

[@dees3179]

Break it into smaller pieces babe, you got this. Even if you are just checking for correct citations it’s all progress. I found it helpful to make sure every paragraph has a particular function. And that those form a narrative. Sounds obvious, but the number I missed was in silly territory. Much better with waffle removed.

[@Ayalachan]

I'm right there with you. Wishing you the best, hang in there! Our time to travel will come some day soon :'D

[@mrsmmoose6775]

Totally been there. You need brain breaks! You'll get there, remember no single document written by one person has ever been perfect.

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

You've got this! ✊

[@lilypudd]

So beautiful!! It's great that Claudia's Dad is there to share the fun with R. You guys are so lucky to have such a loving family.

[@DB-sc2hg]

It was amazing, at 20 months, how clear Rupert was, when asking to get out of his buggy. His language skills are quite good.

[@PhoebeFayRuthLouise]

Oh, I felt that pain of explaining invisible disabilities! Yikes! So glad your trip has been wonderful other than that!

[@dr.gwendolyncarter]

The blue drink is probably blue pea flower tea. It's a natural pH indicator, so the lemon or orange slice added to the drink turns the drink from blue to purple. The rice from the second? Vlog was probably made with this tea to give the blue color.

[@moistsquish]

Aww little Rupert saying up up is too cute

[@themarvellousmrsmorticia]

Rupert is such a busy little person, adorable 🥰 x

[@DaemlichesStueck]

If you read this Jessica: I get a migraine prevention pen from my neurologist once a month. The medication is called Aimovig (in germany, might be something else in the uk) it reduces my monthly migraines from 6-8 times a month to once! It's magic!

[@alicerosfield8078]

You guys are hero's for taking a toddler with you on holiday. Oh how I wish we had gone away more when ours were tiny and immobile! We haven't left the country in 6 years. Thanks for keeping me company when the big one's are at school and the baby naps. xx

[@anaalicekohler1268]

omg first time watching the video right when it’s posted! Love your content, Jess, it makes me hopeful about my future being queer (i’m eighteen!). Love from Brasil🫶

[@resourceress7]

As someone with dietary restrictions because a lot of things make me ill, it's very stressful when I go somewhere where I did not make the food. How are you handling this, Jessica? You always look so happy in the restaurant clips, but I have found there's only so much questioning that can happen comfortably. And the answer is I need are not always known by the staff, so I can't trust what's safe to eat. Ugh. Eating is so stressful.

[@yasminceleste3844]

I cannot express how much joy theses videos bring me! And also seriously make me want to go spend a week in a resort in Thailand... Not sure when you're heading back to the UK but wishing you safe travels xx

[@ameliajohnson5006]

It’s a good day when Jessica uploads after Rose and Rosie haha

[@arvlis1469]

Concerning the passport queue, a helpful thing that I've seen people do: When I was standing in an hours long queue in a hallway waiting to get to the front desk of a doctor's office (you went to the desk first, they would check you in and afterwards you'd sit in the waiting room until the doctor called you), elderly people who came after me would ask the person in front of them "hey, I cant stand for so long, so I'll go sit down in the waiting room already. When I see you at the front of the queue, I'll jump back in my spot" You could do something similar at airports, explain to the people in front or behind you what you're doing and then granddad and Jessica can go find a seat somewhere.

[@vilmalonneborg]

So happy to see you enjoying yourself! I did just want to point out at that 34:24 we get a quick peek at Rupert’s face. It’s very brief but just wanted to point it out in case that would be something you’d want to censor

[@FOJO27]

I noticed too - glad you pointed this out

[@HeyItsZee_]

Yea you're right!

[@honorcollins6962]

Barely! It’s only a corner of his face at an angle

[@megdelaney3677]

Thanks so much for sharing your lovely holiday! Rupert is so cute! Did I catch him signing at the turtle pool?

[@diabolicaldebbie]

Amazing parenting. It teaches a child how to be adaptive and it will benefit them greatly later on in life.

[@marikotrue3488]

The colors are so clear, so saturated and obviously beautiful, is it Thailand or a new lens, guessing it is primarily Thailand. Traveling with a toddler or any young child is fine as long as the child accepts change and noise. I agree while the memories will be faint, the saved images online or in-hand via book will do. Amazing how very young children can take experiences like this trip as an acceleration to learning...everything. Plus learning always moves faster and more successfully with FUN!

[@MeghanIstrePhotography]

I love living vicariously through you guys. I have PTSD and my fear keeps me from going places outside the USA. I would love to travel to so many different countries and experience different cultures.

[@whoviangirl3878]

(CODA here) i feel like i totally did that as a kid lol

[@Imberis]

It seems like a lovely trip all around for the most part! And how nice that Claudia's dad got to come along for part of it. I can't believe they don't even let you take a buggy through the passport line! So if you have a small child that can't walk you just have to carry them the whole way?

[@kaz555]

Am really enjoying your holiday vlogs. Sorry about your experience at the airport. I can't stand for long periods of time, so I understand an hour feeling like a day. Love the ring for Claudia. Rupert is adorable as always.

[@FOJO27]

@34:25 Can see Rupert's face 🙈 (just pointing out so you can blur/edit)

[@jamesdinkinslll]

Happy birthday, Jessica Fozard! My love and blessings to you.

[@Ruby.D]

Not Rupert vibing to ABBA 😭

[@joray5756]

Jess, Claud and Rupert are the cutest family.

[@luaourus]

Just so you know, around 34 min, when Jessica is helping Rupert with his breakfast, half of his face shows up! I don’t know if it is much, but perhaps you’d like to be aware of it 😊 I absolutely loved this vlog, it was really relaxing and it is always good to see you having fun! 💖

[@HOHNancy]

I enjoyed this video! ❤️ Gorgeous rooms you all stayed in; George the monitor lizard (LOL); all the delicious food you showed us; Jessica’s birthday; and Claudia’s beautiful ring. 😊 So much fun! 😊

[@sallyjordan4869]

I’m happy that you had such a lovely birthday, Jessica. As always, you and Claudia and Rupert are so pretty. 🎀💖🎀

[@ElicBehexan]

Wow! As I sit here in Texas, with snow and ice - yeah, I know... - and hoping my flight won't be canceled AGAIN. I look at you in that beautiful warm place... **sigh**

[@michaelnewton5873]

Rupert was so cool in the red chefs hat.

[@scilines]

This was so fun! Glad you enjoyed your birthday 🥰

[@mxg75]

Diet Coke was formulated during the New Coke era in the 80's, and was supposed to taste like the sweeter New Coke, rather than Coca-Cola Classic. People didn't like New Coke, so they brought back Coca-Cola Classic, but never reformulated Diet Coke. Coke Zero is a supposed to taste like regular Coke, but if you like the Diet Coke, it make sense that the Pepsi products would taste better to you then Coke Zero.

[@meinhartfrancois]

Glad the Pepsi Max works for you & tastes better than the Diet Coke! I read somewhere that Coca Cola was formulated to taste best icecold, but Pepsi worked on a formula that didn't require refrigeration... supposedly, at their respective temperatures, they taste the same. I've never tested it myself & I don't know how it applies to the sugarfree versions, but perhaps it's something you could look into, if you want? A late happy birthday!

[@myribunt5261]

I'm so glad u guys are having such a fabulous time, you deserve it! Also my initial reaction to Claud saying "you're talking over me" was like ooh Oop. But perhaps it's just informative because deaf?

[@noamschwarz4512]

great video! I did find the transitional music to be really loud compared to the audio in the talking bits (but I know that can be hard to balance sometimes)

[@_andrewvia]

Your hair, in the sun, is so beautiful. I met a girl once who had dark red chestnut-colored hair - deep and rich. Yours is (of course) lighter in the sun - almost like copper. So wonderful. Thank you for situating your vlog location in a bright place.

[@_andrewvia]

I could see the migraine in your face. You are amazing to record a vlog during that time.

[@LadyDarkSunMoon]

Wow, thank you for sharing all the nice sceneries with us who can't travel at the moment. It managed to uplift me mood. I'm glad your travels have gone well, even though exhausting, and that Rupert seems to enjoy himself a lot, too. It is also quite nice to discover all the cultural tidbits here and there.

[@krystakree]

My son is a CODA, he has slowly started realizing to look AT me and not just in my direction. My nephew however, yes. He will turn MY head to look at him haha

[@katerrinah5442]

I love seeing you guys have a lovely holiday, looks like a blast! Also what is it with us IBS/EDS people and pan Asian cuisine... I swear me and everyone I know with the same cluster of dietary issues are so into it! I had to go get dinner during this video because oh man the food looks AMAZING

[@judebrown4103]

So glad you had a lovely birthday. This made me smile and relax after an exhausting evening. No energy for more comments though, so thank you for taking us along with you. (Long time ME/CFS)

[@cherylcarlson3315]

First thing I thought is how much standing and walking you are doing. Amazing. This time made ginger tea to watch you by to counteract the food footage desire. LOVE sapphires but never got my rich relative to go buying for me when she goes to SE Asia and does the circuit. Great ring

[@jennifers5560]

That ring did look beautiful!

[@CoraBorealis]

Oh I think George is a Tegu! They're gorgeous lizards and can be very friendly

[@Catfishemporer]

Hes a water monitor! Tegus are from South America. Water monitors are really common in South east asia. They are really chill and often wander around urban areas.

[@jennifers5560]

@@Catfishemporer I don’t think Claudia was vibing with George no matter what he is!

[@MoonMan422]

When Claudia stopped at “fancy pants” my brain just went “Jessica has pants?”

[@honorcollins6962]

I’m fairly sure she wears pants 😂

[@resourceress7]

American here. I had the same brief reaction to the word pants.

[@knittingmoose]

I am so deeply envious of you're meeting George. If I saw a monitor lizard in the wild I would lose my hecking mind. So cool!

[@ruthcousins3110]

Wow how beautiful 😍 also its so lovely to travel with grandparents gives everyone amazing family time and parents a chance to enjoy a date night without kids

[@0777sadie]

I would Love the name of the resort. I do believe it's made it to my bucket list... 36:38 Didn't realise how long your hair really is because it's usually got the curls. Looks Gorgeous!

[@BethAge95]

It truly looks like paradise! But even more than the surroundings it's your love for each other and your family that makes it so special. It always warms my heart when I see you together :)

[@TherealHRHMarissa]

My little family and I have been sick for the eleventyfirst time this year. My two year old will watch your vlogs with me if I fast forward to the bits with Rupert and the dogs. After watching this one we actually felt so much better! Despite having watched tv all day in an attempt to forget the misery. Thanks for wholesome content that’s not overstimulating!

[@elizabethwhite1477]

You beautiful people! Been watching you for ages and then on your parenting journey and it has been an inspiration. Did lots of Montessori research. I am now expecting and am inspired as ever by your parenting style and choices. Question: how do you deal with problematic behaviour? How do you Montessori in the more challenging moments? You have a beautiful family and I respect that your online presence is yours to choose. I am not looking for dirt or anything, I am just hoping for some practical guidance for dealing with difficult situations that aligns with your calm and kind parenting approach that I hope to use myself :).

[@logo9470]

Congratulations on your little bundle of joy! 🐣🍼

[@mrsmmoose6775]

Jessica, thank you a million times for this video, it cheered me up so much. Is it possible to share where you stayed? My partner has PTSD. Having a real-life video of a resort like this, and knowing which one it is, would allow them to check it out and see if they feel safe going there. Sorry if I've missed the name in the video.

[@mrsmmoose6775]

Edit: worked it out. Thank you for sharing your holiday experience in such detail, it's so helpful for people like us who have challenges accessing fun places.

[@julescaru8591]

Love this video, looks like you’ve had an , overall , lovely time, aww grandad ! All the best Jules 🌈💕

[@abigailwood-bodley5205]

Me dying at how cute babies with British accents are. 🥹

[@TheSpideycounselor]

Diet soda in other countries is all over the place! When I was in South Africa there was Diet Coke (my go to), but for some reason Coke Zero was more common and tasted better!

[@meowmeowkittycatmeowmeow]

Loving your videos! ❤️ Really interesting to hear the difference in the way airlines deal with disability. I've only done domestic Australian flights, and there is a tick box as you book the flight with no evidence needed, and several questions about if you need extra care or if someone travelling with you will be able to assist. They will gladly push the person in the wheelchair for you if it's one provided by the airport, and then they can load you up the lift prior to everyone else boarding (if you aren't on an expensive flight with an aerobridge), although you will exit the plane last, which has never bothered me as we would be waiting for checked luggage anyway and you're not in the bustle of people leaving and end up leaving things behind. Although, we have had some mishaps with cheaper airlines where you cannot precheck in online or at the self check in, and neither can an ablebodied partner, so we did both miss a flight that was technically still open for check in only because we were both marked as disabled and stuck waiting in the staffed line to see someone. Also got to security lines and had to ask the airline staff to help skip the nearly empty winding able queue because they wouldn't open the disability line for our wheelchair? We've also had lots of lovely experiences with staff being more than happy to help though, but these have just been some unfortunate and sometimes expensive (when we didn't want to have to have more unpleasantness arguing with the airline) experiences too.

[@anxen]

Jes, may I strongly recommend buying a vounot trolley with seat (actually in my profile photo) which is a life saver for chronic fatigue when travelling or just any situation where there might not be seating available.

[@chibisaraface]

There's Pepsi Max syrup for soda stream now. Makes my life so much easier haha

[@alexvainio]

What a lovely vlog, enjoyed every minute. Thank you! ❤️

[@bipolartorecovery1485]

I do wonder how Jessica manages her meals while out. I am on a low fodmap diet, not unlike her and eating at restaurants is equally disappointing since no one can make safe food that tastes decent besides myself as well as scary/intimidating since the staff ask "what can't you have" when really the question should be "what can you have" i would think that parts of Asia are more familiar with cooking Jain style which means no onion or garlic. I am curious what she does to get ready for these adventures and how she does her pacing while away from her normal environment

[@asecretcourtofcrowsandcloc4084]

Seems like you’re having a good trip, I think it’s great that you took Rupert with you and gave him all these l developmental experiences

[@Nao_Craft]

Thank you for the reminder about special assistance at airports / while travelling. I have a big international trip this year and while I didn’t need assistance for a short inter-state trip last year, I will do anything to avoid those major passport control queues!

[@maddieev]

Hi Jessica, I noticed Rupert's face is in frame for a second around 34:27, just wanted to give you the heads up if you wanted to blur!

[@_andrewvia]

My Mom said that she had no idea what she was doing when she raised my sister and me. She did what made sense. In Al-Anon there's a saying: "When you are stunned by stress or loss or confusion, do the next right thing."

[@ryguy56]

rupert’s hello kitty plate is too cute!!😅

[@meowmeowkittycatmeowmeow]

Also, interested to know more about how you dealt with the possibility of needing emergency healthcare as a disabled person, as that is currently a barrier (other than money) to us travelling to other countries. How did you decide that the places that you've travelled are safe in case of a medical emergency, both health care wise and insurance wise? Currently, I'm thinking that countries that have reciprocal healthcare to mine (usually within the commonwealth) are a good bet, but I find it more relaxing in my mind to just stick with my own country as there's still lots I haven't seen here.

[@debbiej6211]

To early for captions. I will be back

[@perfectlyhopeless]

How have I never noticed that Claudia has tattoos until this moment

[@cathrenriddler45]

I love seeing you all so happy! Even with the slight health hiccups. Rupert is getting so big and becoming the most sweetest lil gentleman. I know we only see the good parts most of the time but I can't picture lil Rupert screaming a fit!! Well done Mommas!!

[@sianthesheep]

Thailand looks absolutely idyllic! As someone who also has POTS waiting in queues is the worst thing for it so I really feel for Jessica having to wait in line for an hour.

[@leahstumm9662]

My next door neighbour is from Thailand. She’s an awesome cook!

[@ronjaj.addams-ramstedt1023]

Beautiful! Will rewatch properly when the captions have arrived.

[@HOHNancy]

Same 😊

[@Armedngirly]

38:50 Jessica what lipstick do you use? How is Claudia not covered in lipstick?! 😆 Whatever you're using I need it!

[@Maryfs1]

As someone who's experiencing 0 degree temperatures right now, I gotta say, I'm REALLY jealous.

[@leslieyancey5084]

Happy birthday, Jessica! I wish you and your family much happiness for many more years to come!

[@spriddlez]

When I was in Japan I had Coca Cola with fibre. tasted perfectly normal! And as a kid who did a lot of travelling before I could remember it I did find it frustrating when I grew up. That said that's when my parents had the money and time to travel so I just try to be grateful they got to see many cool things.

[@mattlewis9261]

I always really enjoy your travel vlogs. Glad you had such a nice birthday.

[@natashaa43]

Oh dear, passport queue horror flashbacks. I travelled three times to the US when my youngest was a baby and toddler and had experienced 2hr Orlando queues (btw, when/if you go to Disney World, fly into Tampa, not Orlando, it's a wee bit better). Anyhoo, Yes, I didn't get my pushchair back once and it was before my daughter was able to stand or crawl. It was the FRICKIN WORST.

[@janisjoplinsgf5382]

32:25 you can see Rupert’s face!!! (Commenting this so she can blur him out)

[@janisjoplinsgf5382]

* 34:24

[@94HopeRemains]

So I'll need to know which resort that was! It looks awesome and fairly accessible, even the non-accessible room would do for us (partner paraplegic, very active, narrow wheelchair). It looks quiet and luxurious so would love to know the name for our future travels!

[@lenakataeva7525]

Resort is amazing! Wow! I have never was in such gorgeous and big place.

[@MilenaxDx]

WOW YOUR HAIR IS AMAZING!!!!

[@luizamatias8625]

You are such amazing parents! Is a delight to watch your journey, lots of love from Brazil 🖤